Latest / MyMaine Birth / 117. MyMaine Birth: Embracing the Warrior Mentality in Childbirth, Theresa's Story

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117. MyMaine Birth: Embracing the Warrior Mentality in Childbirth, Theresa's Story · MyMaine Birth

0:00
Theresa: when you are in a life-changing stage of life, it always pays to have a warrior mentality versus a fear-based mentality.
0:08
Theresa: Because it's very easy to be fearful of the stages of pregnancy.
0:13
Theresa: It's very it's kind of almost easy to be fearful of the outcome and it's you know.
0:18
Theresa: You can be fearful of labor, you can be fearful of new, newborn hood.
0:22
Theresa: You can be fearful of having a toddler, you can be fearful of having a teenager.
0:24
Theresa: There's just so many things to be fearful of new, newborn hood.
0:25
Theresa: You can be fearful of having a toddler.
0:25
Theresa: You can be fearful of having a teenager.
0:25
Theresa: There's just so many things to be fearful of and have that kind of mentality.
0:30
Theresa: But it doesn't pay like to do some more, you know to, to push through and have a warrior mentality where, yes, we will tackle that, like, yes, this will pass, this won't last forever, we can get through this.
0:42
Theresa: I think that it there's always a benefit to that.
0:48
Theresa: It was when I took a birthing class.
0:49
Theresa: They said do not get in the fear loop.
0:50
Theresa: When you start contractions, don't fear the next contraction, because you're not going to be able to ride it if you're fearful even before it starts.
0:58
Theresa: And they just said just know, we'll end and have a warrior mentality, and I think that's just very, very important, because if you have a can-do mentality, it will serve you better than having a fearful or hesitant mentality.
1:18
Angela: I'm Angela and I'm a certified birth photographer, experienced doula, childbirth educator and your host here on the my Maine Birth podcast.
1:26
Angela: This is a space where we share the real-life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine, from our state's biggest hospitals to birth center births and home births.
1:39
Angela: Every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated.
1:43
Angela: Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you.
1:51
Angela: Welcome back.
1:54
Angela: This is episode 117.
1:57
Angela: Today's birth story guest is Teresa.
2:00
Angela: Teresa reached out to me earlier this year, just before she was due to birth her fourth baby, and she was interested in my sisterhood birth package, which is birth photography and doula support.
2:11
Angela: Normally I am fully booked several months in advance, but occasionally I'm able to accept a few more families that inquire with me last minute.
2:19
Angela: So not long after getting to know each other in our initial consultation, I got the call that her labor had started and that she was heading into the beautiful birthing suites at Mercy Hospital.
2:29
Angela: During her labor, she utilized one of my favorite tools that I have in my bag as a doula, and that is the birth sling.
2:36
Angela: The birth sling is an amazing way to support upright and active labor positions, no matter where you choose to give birth.
2:44
Angela: I have a few of these, because every family that I work with through my sisterhood package gets one to use for those final weeks of pregnancy and during your labor.
2:52
Angela: If that's something you feel called to, so definitely listen through to this whole episode to hear all about her experience with that.
2:59
Angela: And I'm also excited for this episode because Teresa's mother, anna, joins us to share all about a very special postpartum soup.
3:09
Angela: All right, hey, teresa, welcome to my Maine Birth.
3:14
Angela: Hi so to jump right into it, would you start by sharing a little bit about you and your family, sure?
3:22
Theresa: I am, I would say, a Mainer.
3:25
Theresa: We moved to Maine when I was seven years old.
3:28
Theresa: We lived in New York City.
3:30
Theresa: My parents are immigrants, they're Chinese immigrants and I'm first generation and we moved to.
3:38
Theresa: Well, my parents lived in New York City but my dad got a job at BAW when I was like two years old, so he was living in Maine and we were commuting back and forth on the weekends, which was kind of crazy, but we were used to it.
3:56
Theresa: My mother really enjoyed her life in New York City.
3:59
Theresa: Especially her parents were there and they would help us with child care, help her with child childcare for me and my brother, and it was really nice for her to be in a city and have like a like a strong Chinese community.
4:11
Theresa: And she worked at the world trade center and as an accountant, so she really had like a fancy job.
4:18
Theresa: She was in the bombing in 93 on the 72nd floor.
4:22
Theresa: Her office, her and her entire office got out safe.
4:25
Theresa: But it was at that point that they reassessed and moved to Maine.
4:28
Theresa: So I've been in Maine since I was seven and grew up in Freeport and then I went away to college.
4:36
Theresa: I moved back to New York city for a year after college and at that point, um, they, I've come from a restaurant family and they my mother was opening a restaurant and they needed a manager.
4:49
Theresa: So I moved back and I opened that restaurant and I've been in the industry ever since amazing.
4:58
Angela: Now, jumping into your birth stories, would you start by sharing how you found out you were pregnant and what your thoughts were in choosing your care?
5:07
Theresa: I found out I was pregnant, for me very late in the process, which was only about six weeks.
5:14
Theresa: But my previous three pregnancies, each time I, I swear I felt like implantation cramping, like immediately, and I knew I was pregnant, oftentimes before the test could confirm it, and I would say, well, I know I'm pregnant.
5:32
Theresa: And Joel would say, well, the test was negative.
5:34
Theresa: And I just scream at him I know I'm pregnant.
5:37
Theresa: So each time I knew I was pregnant.
5:40
Theresa: But this time there was so much going on, like in life and with the other kids, that I, I guess either I wasn't as in touch with my body or I feel like, sometimes, like pregnancy hormones are it's kind of like any other, like drug that you would introduce into your body, like the more you expose yourself to it, like the more your body normalizes it.
6:01
Theresa: I remember the first time I was pregnant, I remember like the wave of hormones being so intense that sometimes I would like have blurred vision and like sunspots, and it was so extreme and I just thought like I can't, I cannot function right now.
6:16
Theresa: And then each time I didn't feel any symptoms, I didn't feel.
6:21
Theresa: I didn't feel different symptoms, I didn't feel.
6:27
Theresa: I didn't feel different I, I guess I just the the distraction of life really really kind of over, like glossed over the what was going on with me internally.
6:33
Theresa: And when I was probably right, when I was pregnant, like right like two weeks in, like when the cycle hasn't even started yet, my daughter asked me if I was pregnant, and she was only three years old at the time and I said no, I'm not pregnant.
6:48
Theresa: Like why would you ask me that?
6:50
Theresa: She said because your stomach looks different.
6:52
Theresa: And I just kind of wrote it off.
6:54
Theresa: And then, four weeks later was when I found out I was pregnant and I was shocked, complete and utter surprise baby.
7:01
Theresa: Wait, I mean, three was my bonus.
7:04
Theresa: The third child was my bonus baby, and this time I was completely and utterly shocked, completely taken back by it.
7:11
Angela: Wow, oh my goodness, what were your thoughts in choosing your care?
7:16
Theresa: I ended up at Mercy for the first of my because I was going through the midwives and the midwives deliver at Mercy.
7:22
Theresa: So I knew of mercy because I had been with friends who had birthed at mercy and I just loved it.
7:28
Theresa: I just really I really like mercy.
7:31
Theresa: I guess I don't know I don't have much of a basis for comparison because I'd only visited suites at Maine Med and heard stories and those are the two big players where I am.
7:41
Theresa: But I knew I wanted to go through the midwives.
7:45
Theresa: I just, I guess I didn't really know why I chose them, but I think I wanted the midwife route versus OB and I'm glad I did.
7:54
Theresa: It was very small practice, just like four midwives and like two medical assistants and one person in the office.
8:02
Theresa: So it just felt very small and felt very intimate and I liked the care that I got there and I very much like Mercy's labor and delivery department.
8:13
Theresa: After going into spontaneous labor and having a natural birth for the first time, when I got pregnant with my second, I did consider doing a home birth and I I talked with a few like my friend is a midwife and and I talked with her and I think, just like the, the financials were not that different and considering I just I just like the setup of Mercy so much that I decided to go back for the second and then for the third and fourth, I didn't really consider another option.
8:41
Angela: So how are you feeling throughout that pregnancy?
8:47
Theresa: option.
8:47
Theresa: So how are you feeling?
8:47
Theresa: Throughout that pregnancy I felt great, I'm fortunate, I enjoy being pregnant.
8:49
Theresa: I have very positive, positive experiences being pregnant and I I kind of view pregnancy like I am the type of person just in like my, my personal and professional life where I just like to optimize like every moment and I like to like find the best outcome and the best use of time and the best use of that resource.
9:08
Theresa: So for me, being pregnant is like the ultimate multitasking.
9:12
Theresa: It's like, oh yes, I'm doing this and I'm growing a human and I just love being pregnant.
9:17
Theresa: Yeah, I love like every day is different and I liked each pregnancy.
9:22
Theresa: As I was pregnant, I liked like challenging myself to have like a better pregnancy or to like get like more fiber and like to get more water and like have more regular bowel movements.
9:33
Theresa: And you know what can I optimize this time, what can I use from my past experiences?
9:37
Theresa: So I very much like being pregnant and I think I like postpartum too.
9:44
Theresa: It's a very peaceful time and I think it's it's nice to have a fast recovery because I had all my babies in such rapid succession that my body knows what to do afterwards.
9:56
Theresa: So I feel great, fortunately, yeah, that's amazing.
10:01
Angela: So how close in age are your kids?
10:03
Angela: That's amazing.
10:04
Angela: So how close in age are your kids?
10:04
Theresa: They're all two years apart roughly.
10:06
Theresa: The first two are exactly, almost exactly exactly two years apart, like with a matter of like three days, and then the age gap between the second and the third is two years and three months, because I didn't want a short age gap like that again.
10:21
Theresa: But then the fourth being an accident, the age gap is like 22 months, not an accident, a surprise, that's a euphemism, right.
10:29
Angela: Right.
10:30
Angela: Would you share a little bit about why you decided to hire a birth photographer?
10:34
Angela: That sort of happened later on in your pregnancy, right?
10:37
Angela: It wasn't long before you went into it.
10:39
Theresa: Yes, yeah, you and I didn't start talking until I was pretty late into the pregnancy.
10:43
Theresa: You and I didn't start talking until I was pretty late into the pregnancy, the third time.
10:46
Theresa: That my third labor was different than my first two.
10:48
Theresa: That because my support person became my best friend.
10:53
Theresa: She was game to be a support person in any way, be it take care of my two children as I went to the hospital or to come to the hospital with me.
11:01
Theresa: And last minute we all decided that the best thing was for her to come to the hospital with me.
11:12
Theresa: And when I went to the hospital with my, when I went into labor for the third time and I went to the hospital with my best friend, the energy was totally different in the room.
11:20
Theresa: It was like my midwife was the founder of the midwifery and she just had this really calm energy about her and and she's just been, you know, through hundreds of labors and I just knew I was in good hands.
11:30
Theresa: And she said is your husband coming?
11:32
Theresa: I said no.
11:33
Theresa: I said my best friend's here and she said I love all female birds, so never, never thought about it like this, but I love it too.
11:40
Theresa: So the the energy was very different.
11:45
Theresa: It was very playful or like you know, it was very light and and I felt like my best friend was almost there in place of a doula, like she was wonderful.
11:50
Theresa: And then because, because I'd given birth before, I didn't really need a lot of assistance from the nurses, and I think there were like two nurses that were like there to support me and one of them just said, like you know what can I do?
12:03
Theresa: And I said, can you take pictures to support me?
12:04
Theresa: And one of them just said, like you know what can I do?
12:06
Theresa: And I said, can you take pictures?
12:07
Theresa: And she didn't.
12:07
Theresa: She took great photos.
12:08
Theresa: She took great photos.
12:09
Theresa: And so when I thought about the last what is very likely the last birth, I thought, man, I'm not going to get that lucky again and have like a nurse ready and able to take photos, and it's just, it's just so special and it's just a special life experience and I would be remiss if I didn't have photos or if I didn't have tangible memories from it.
12:33
Theresa: So, yeah, I reached out to you and that's how that was my job process for photos Turned out, actually, that I had the same nurse that took the photos from my third pregnancy.
12:46
Theresa: She was my nurse again or she was like in the circulation of nurses that I had again when I went into labor for the fourth time.
12:55
Theresa: So I got to see her again and we said thank you so much for the photos and I said we love them so much that I actually I got in touch with Angela because I I couldn't, you know, I couldn't bear the thought of not having photos.
13:07
Angela: Oh, that's so cool, yeah, so now, what were the final weeks and then days leading up to when your labor started?
13:14
Angela: Like for you, final days.
13:17
Theresa: There were not a lot of tells that it was the final days, but the final weeks leading up I was so, so heavy and slow.
13:24
Theresa: Final weeks leading up I was so, so heavy and slow and my home is very tall and the doing the stairs with the young children, with the bedrooms so high up, was it was a lot.
13:34
Theresa: So I depend, I leaned on, leaned on Joel a lot for child care because I just wasn't, wasn't mentally there and was really hard.
13:45
Theresa: I felt like my children were becoming feral because I couldn't really like hold boundaries or discipline when I couldn't move.
13:50
Theresa: I couldn't string together many thoughts and, yeah, it just was slow.
13:56
Theresa: But I felt good and wow, it's like I don't even remember.
13:59
Theresa: I just remember feeling slow and feeling like I didn't know when the baby was going to come.
14:04
Theresa: But I have gone as early as two weeks early.
14:06
Theresa: So I just went into premature nesting mode and I just organized and cleaned and sorted things and rearranged kids' rooms for optimal entertainment after the baby was born.
14:18
Angela: Yeah, that's so helpful, rotating all those toys one last time.
14:21
Angela: So how did your labor start?
14:31
Theresa: I was going to labor overnight, always at like 2am.
14:33
Theresa: I realize now because I kept notes on each labor.
14:34
Theresa: That was my previous way to document the pregnancies and labor.
14:36
Theresa: I just kept notes like a journal on my phone and I realized that I always went into labor at 2 am or around that time and I think it was the rainstorm it was raining.
14:46
Theresa: With my second she was born during the full moon.
14:51
Theresa: I went into labor during the full moon and she was born within minutes of the peak of the full moon.
14:56
Theresa: So definitely some barometric pressures at play.
15:02
Theresa: But it was raining and I woke up and started having contractions and I called my best friend and I said it's happening.
15:10
Theresa: And I just said it's starting.
15:12
Theresa: I did not have false labor in the days leading up to real labor, it just started.
15:16
Theresa: It was kind of most peaceful, rolling contractions to start.
15:20
Theresa: I feel like contractions are a lot more bearable with water intact.
15:22
Theresa: So I've done it both ways and I definitely prefer my water being intact.
15:28
Theresa: I had the most peculiar labor this time where I could stop my labor fully just by sitting.
15:34
Theresa: I could just sit and it would stop so I could just take a break at any time.
15:38
Theresa: It was just crazy.
15:40
Theresa: I've never experienced that.
15:41
Theresa: But when I get to the hospital I had the nurses check me, check me, and it was like a game at that point, like how dilated am I?
15:48
Theresa: And the nurses said she's hoping for something more than five.
15:58
Theresa: And then she checked me and she said eight.
15:59
Theresa: And we all celebrated, which was very funny and yeah, when we got to the hospital, just we, we could very calmly discuss my plan because I could stop my labor at any time and just have a nice calm conversation.
16:11
Theresa: But the caveat was that the minute I stood up, I would, I would pay for it Like I would experience all the contractions with full force that I didn't have while I was sitting.
16:22
Angela: Yeah, and that's really interesting because you ended up birthing upright.
16:25
Angela: So would you share a little bit about your thoughts on the birth sling?
16:31
Theresa: I loved that sling and then everyone who came into contact with it loved it too.
16:36
Theresa: The midwives were like, how do we get one for the office?
16:38
Theresa: Like how do we get one of these?
16:39
Theresa: I loved the birth swing.
16:41
Theresa: I feel like the birth swing yeah, I was, I was upright, but I think I was like bent over most of the time until I finally started pushing on the stool.
16:50
Theresa: But I started pushing on the stool because my legs were giving out, because I had to stay standing in order to have like have like fruitful contractions.
17:01
Theresa: I had to stay standing and I think that I started having contractions at 2 am and I started pacing the house at like between 4 and 6 am and then I think the baby was born, really 2 pm.
17:17
Theresa: I don't quite remember.
17:18
Theresa: But whenever my midwife brought the stool it's because I said my leg was cramping she said, well, you've been standing for 12 hours, so I ended up birthing on the stool.
17:26
Theresa: But I love the swing.
17:28
Theresa: The swing it like it just is an instrument to help you, help your own body.
17:36
Theresa: It's like giving you so much like input or like that's not the word I'm looking for, um, I don't know.
17:45
Theresa: I feel like it just gives you information on your body Like, oh, like I can read, I can kind of redirect, like something is holding like me up so I can redirect my strength to like my arms, or I can redirect my strength to my legs because like my upper body is being supported or like I can lean back so I can alleviate, like holding myself up like, and like my back body is supported so I can more engage my front body.
18:13
Theresa: I really really like the swing.
18:16
Theresa: I mean the thing that I appreciate most about like going a midwife route is like just like the freedom to move, and that's what I like most about natural labor is just the freedom to move and I I feel like the birth swing is just like the ultimate aid in that process.
18:35
Angela: Yeah, your midwife followed you and yeah, you were kind of hanging out in the birth sling by the door.
18:42
Angela: She just, yeah, let you claim that power, like.
18:45
Angela: What was that like for you?
18:47
Theresa: It was wonderful.
18:49
Theresa: I feel like like there's just so much like respect given and like through that practice and the nurses and the hospital there, and I um trying to think back, if I have.
19:00
Theresa: Oh, yeah, I was.
19:01
Theresa: I was in the bed all three times, except except this time, and I didn't know up from down, but after looking at the photos I realized my midwife was just crouched on the ground under me where all the action was, because she just followed me where I was and yeah, I just knew.
19:16
Theresa: I just knew that's where I needed to be.
19:19
Angela: Yeah, that intuitive movement, yes, for sure.
19:22
Angela: So how was your immediate postpartum time?
19:33
Theresa: immediate postpartum time.
19:33
Theresa: I remember it's being very intense because I was, I was sitting and I was just kind of all exposed and I was shaking all over and, I think, maybe a little cold too after um, after exerting that much, and I think that it was my second hardest labor.
19:46
Theresa: For sure.
19:47
Theresa: The two labors before then were not as intense and I remember not having to work very hard the last two labors, but this one was a lot of work.
19:58
Theresa: I pushed for 10 minutes, which for my previous two births I only pushed one time.
20:03
Theresa: But this time I pushed about 10 minutes and I think that I could have had more contractions but I just wanted to be finished, so I pushed myself over the edge and so then postpartum, I felt all the after effects of that and I think the moments after birth are always very intense.
20:29
Theresa: This one was was pretty intense and I was shaking and I think that, like the, the, the heightened emotion was built upon by my mother coming in like just minutes after birth and she was so like it's such, such, I don't know such shock and exuberance and she was so happy and kind of shocked and she's very empathetic, so I think it was a lot for her to see me immediately post-birth and shaking, but I think it's better that way that she didn't see me in the throes of birth.
21:06
Theresa: I think that maybe it would have been too intense for her and then too intense for me to see my mother so worried.
21:12
Theresa: But she came in afterwards and she was still worried, but she was also happy and very relieved and she had been roaming the halls.
21:20
Theresa: She didn't know how to get inside the birthplace.
21:24
Theresa: She had been roaming the halls so I think she was very relieved to have found me and yeah, but I think that it was wonderful.
21:33
Theresa: I was just.
21:33
Theresa: I was just sitting and holding my baby and my mother was holding me and it was wonderful.
21:39
Theresa: It's a lot nicer than being in a hospital bed.
21:41
Angela: Yeah, that was so, so sweet.
21:43
Angela: Was there tearing, I didn't tear.
21:48
Theresa: I didn't tear and my recovery was great.
21:53
Theresa: I think I felt a little more sore just because of the.
21:56
Theresa: For me it was extra pushing.
21:58
Theresa: I felt a bit sore, like I hadn't felt sore in a while or like I did not feel sore with my third.
22:05
Theresa: She had a very small and cooperative head.
22:08
Theresa: She had a very small and cooperative head.
22:12
Theresa: She's just such a cooperative birth.
22:13
Theresa: But this time I felt a bit sore but otherwise I felt great.
22:16
Theresa: I felt great.
22:17
Theresa: It was my smallest time between births, so I feel like my body just knew what to do.
22:24
Theresa: I hadn't been that long since it had been in that condition previously and, yeah, I great.
22:30
Theresa: I probably did a lot of things that would not be recommended for a postpartum woman to do, like install running boards on a car.
22:38
Theresa: I did that because I didn't receive.
22:45
Theresa: I didn't get a new vehicle until four days postpartum, so I moved all the car seats by myself and it's a higher car, so I purchased and installed running boards myself.
22:55
Theresa: I thought it would be a fun postpartum project.
22:58
Angela: Wow, how are you feeling after that?
23:01
Theresa: It felt good to move my body.
23:02
Theresa: I feel like sometimes soreness is compounded if you kind of baby that spot, whereas if you get freshly oxygenated blood in those areas, like, I think it's good.
23:12
Theresa: I think it's good to move.
23:14
Angela: So I think, had you mentioned, your mom was making you some special soups that were like family recipes for your postpartum.
23:23
Theresa: Yes, there's quite a strict postpartum regimen that the Chinese follow.
23:28
Theresa: One is just being warm and being kept warm and having warm soups and nourishing broths.
23:35
Theresa: There is a soup that not a soup but like a stew that is made and it's supposed to sit and it is made of trotters, which are pig's feet, and ginger and hard boiled eggs and lots of brown sugar and dark soy sauce which is kind of like a caramelized, like soy sauce.
23:57
Theresa: So it's just very dark, dark soup and I think it's honestly supposed to mimic visually mimic afterbirth, like it's very dark and like you know, it kind of looks bloody.
24:11
Theresa: It's like very, very dark brown and the idea is that once you're no longer bleeding or passing clots, the soup is supposed to be eaten then and because trotters or pig feet have so much like fat and collagen, it's supposed to replenish what you lost.
24:32
Theresa: Mama, can you tell more about the soup?
24:35
Theresa: What soup Go to girl, my girl, paul, here's the expert.
24:46
Theresa: Hi this is my mother, hannah.
24:50
Anna: After she born the baby.
24:52
Anna: And then our traditions need some ginger ginger root.
24:59
Anna: You make the soup with chicken with some like the pork feet, because the skin have some collagen and then the help her Ginger is to push the air out.
25:18
Anna: That's our tradition thing.
25:20
Anna: We put some like dry mushrooms, because that's a natural mushrooms Like a root Clean your inside black, inside the areas black, push out.
25:39
Anna: Just like if in hospital after baby born they push your stomach like a push like the black out.
25:47
Anna: But my, our stuff you eat after, eat after it, help you push that stuff out, clean inside the system.
25:57
Anna: And then the they give more like um, protect your body because you lose a lot of blood, a lot of energy, ginger, just just all our, don't matter what age, even though now you every day have like a three-piece fesh ginger you're chewing every day.
26:17
Anna: That's clean your system to push the bad out, the air out, and then you don't have a lot of air in your stomach.
26:25
Anna: Then you never have like a stomach hurts, heartburn or something.
26:30
Anna: We don't have that kind of problems.
26:31
Anna: And then never have like a stomach hurts, half one or something, we don't have that kind of problems.
26:33
Anna: And then we have like some mushrooms that all like um, because the um or herbs like a kind of dry vegetables after we're soaking stuff and put together with the chicken or wine.
26:51
Anna: We put a little rice wine too.
26:53
Anna: But beginning we don't put that much because you need to give birth for the baby Ginger is good Ginger and then just make the soup more like a calcium, something inside, help the new mother get more energy back and then other things after 15 days later, because the blood already stopped Before she have, we think about have one more one month or one and a half months the baby be born.
27:30
Anna: We already started to cook some very special things like vinegar, pork feet and some.
27:41
Anna: The vinegar is not like a supermarket vinegar.
27:47
Anna: That vinegar at least their natural, natural vinegar, soaked for long times we call it black vinegar or mature vinegar.
28:00
Theresa: Or rice and rice and herbs and it is actually delicious vinegar.
28:08
Theresa: If you ever like, you can get it into in an Asian market, not a regular grocery store.
28:14
Theresa: But black vinegar is very aromatic and it's actually delicious addition to Asian foods, like anything that's very fatty yeah, it's a fatty, or anything that's very fatty.
28:27
Theresa: The mature vinegar is a great complement to fatty foods For a lot of ginger.
28:33
Anna: We peel the skin, the ginger skin, and then we use the wok to stir-fry.
28:40
Anna: Let them dry and then put the vinegar together, cook for like one hour and then let them cool and then every week just keep it.
28:52
Anna: Don't let it get mold or something, kill the drain.
28:55
Anna: Every week just reheat, reheat, let them burn.
28:58
Anna: After the baby born 15 days, we just put a hot feed egg all together, put inside the ginger and vinegar stuff, then you cook together, put inside the ginger and vinegar stuff, then you cooked every day.
29:14
Anna: Just give a little bit for the for the mother to eat.
29:17
Anna: And what's that for mama?
29:18
Anna: What is that?
29:19
Anna: For the same thing, just like push the bacteria out and no more blood in your stomach, in your earrings, because why the woman like a other.
29:34
Anna: Later they have a earrings, have problems, have a cyst, something.
29:39
Anna: But our traditions, or clean up after you born the baby, clean up everything the bad bacteria.
29:46
Theresa: So mom would you say there's a?
29:48
Theresa: There's a soup that you eat right after the baby is born.
29:52
Theresa: Then after you stop bleeding, there's a different soup.
29:55
Theresa: Yeah, both are for pushing out bacteria and cleaning out your arteries.
29:59
Theresa: Yes, to prevent health complications later in life.
30:05
Anna: Just don't leave any black breathing inside, just clean up all the system, my system, very clean.
30:13
Anna: And then when your next parents, parents the parent of the baby, not any something inside the bad material, just clean.
30:24
Anna: I think our traditions like, because we have 5,000 history, a lot of good things, they keep it.
30:34
Anna: The generation past generation, that's my.
30:37
Anna: I remember when I have her and my son, my mom already told me to do this and then my mom said does her mother teach her to do that?
30:49
Anna: That's all generation by generation.
30:52
Anna: In China, after the baby born we are very careful, like a big hat, don't let them get a wing, because they say if too cold, it gets sick.
31:02
Anna: Because you on that time you are very your immune system is not that strong like before, easy to get sick, so we don't go out.
31:10
Anna: But you know it's not that strong like before.
31:11
Anna: It's easy to get sick, so we don't go out.
31:12
Anna: But before it's not very clean, they don't know how to keep yourself, protect yourself.
31:21
Anna: But in our country we never let people wash hands right away because they say after the baby is born, the whole body, the uh course, I bought him a horse, yeah, the painful disability, uh, painful disciple.
31:39
Anna: So whole body, the pave all open.
31:41
Anna: Yeah, easy to get any uh disease, any cold, because you're very tired, not energy to fight with any disease, any drink.
31:53
Anna: So we're very protective for the mother just born the baby.
31:59
Anna: We don't let other people come in the house, just one or two, but they make sure they clean.
32:04
Anna: So in other cases.
32:07
Anna: To hold the baby, even to give the woman to the mother to eat all the stuff.
32:12
Anna: Use the hot water.
32:13
Anna: Born to stop no drink.
32:15
Anna: Make sure, even though long time ago they don't have like now they already know to cook all the stuff hot water.
32:22
Anna: They don't have alcohol, they just use that kind of uh the to to try to kill all the germs, protect the new mother.
32:30
Anna: I think it's good because I feel, even though now next year I'm 70 years old, I'm okay.
32:39
Theresa: One thing you said those leg injections, those anti-inflammatory drugs, can make you have less wrinkles she says that the collagen in the pig, in the pig's feet, are um, will prevent wrinkles too oh, good thing, yeah, we.
32:59
Anna: We eat a lot of pig feet, skin or something, not, not the fat things.
33:03
Theresa: We take the fat things out, just eat the uh so yeah, once the fat is rendered out of the skin and the collagen, that is what is ingested.
33:10
Theresa: Um, so it's less like eating the fat and, rendered out of the skin and the collagen, that is what is ingested.
33:11
Theresa: So it's less like eating the fat and more.
33:15
Anna: I'm okay, huh, I don't have that much wrinkle, oh my gosh, you look great that is amazing my mom.
33:22
Anna: Even though my mom she passed away on 80 years old.
33:27
Anna: She still walk.
33:29
Anna: Just take a bus, come to Maine to visit her when she have her first baby, but have friends come together with her.
33:37
Anna: But she walk very well and then she skis very good too.
33:41
Anna: Oh, wow, I think that this tradition is a help.
33:46
Anna: I don't have a, I don't do a lot of research, but they just from the all the family for the tradition help.
33:49
Anna: I don't have a, I don't do a lot of research, but they just from all the family for the tradition.
33:55
Anna: We all eat like this.
33:56
Anna: I push her, don't let her go out, put her hair on something, but she listens good, I just don't want to when her get older and get problems someday.
34:08
Anna: Some people like a shrink the hair like this, don't know they.
34:14
Anna: They say, because you don't put a lot of after baby born to put a lot of calcium to, to, uh, refill your system, I don't know, I'm, I'm okay yeah, that's amazing.
34:26
Angela: Thank you so much for sharing all of that.
34:28
Anna: I really very nice talk to you and then if we need something, I can help, we share.
34:34
Anna: We're all women.
34:37
Theresa: I have one Chinese friend.
34:39
Theresa: Growing up in Maine it's not very common to have a Chinese community but I did.
34:46
Theresa: I have one Chinese friend and she is a similar age to me and I remember the first time that I had one Chinese friend and she is a similar age to me and I remember the first time that I had a child.
34:53
Theresa: She said she's she's, um, she's a chef, so she knows all about like cultural foods.
35:00
Theresa: And she said that she consulted her mother on how to make the soup for me, like the postpartum soup with the trotters and the vinegar and the ginger.
35:10
Theresa: And her mother said well, you can't take her mother's privilege away to make her the soup.
35:25
Theresa: So I think it is very heavily cultural that there's a whole routine and community and ritual involved in caring for the mother postpartum.
35:35
Theresa: I think that's quite beautiful.
35:38
Angela: Yeah, it really is, and it's so important and I love hearing about all of that.
35:44
Theresa: That's very cool about the soup that I didn't know until this time around is that I hate ginger.
35:56
Theresa: I am a chef and I am Chinese and I hate ginger.
35:57
Theresa: I don't like eating it.
35:58
Theresa: I like the flavor Ginger tea, great.
35:59
Theresa: I just hate eating ginger.
36:01
Theresa: So my mother had to force me to eat bits of this soup Because you're supposed to drink the broth but you're also supposed to eat the solids, but I hate ginger.
36:09
Theresa: And she like cause you're supposed to drink the broth but you're also supposed to eat, eat the solids, but I hate ginger.
36:12
Theresa: And she said she said eat it, try it.
36:15
Theresa: And I said oh, I hate ginger.
36:17
Theresa: And then she took a bite of it and she said oh, this ginger is very mild.
36:19
Theresa: And she so the ginger is supposed to be indicative of the child's temperament and my son, my, my fourth born son, is he's very sweet and mild.
36:32
Theresa: I don't know if he'll stay that way, but he's incredibly sweet.
36:37
Theresa: He's just happy and he lays there and he watches and he observes and he tracks and he smiles and he laughs and if he's hungry he'll just complain a little and if he's tired he'll just complain a little.
36:49
Theresa: And anyway, she said that his ginger is is very mild and she said that my ginger was bitterly spicy.
36:59
Angela: Oh my gosh.
37:00
Theresa: She seems to think that I'm the most difficult child that ever existed.
37:03
Theresa: So she said that your ginger was so spicy.
37:07
Angela: Oh my gosh, that's really interesting as, as a final question, if you were to give advice to someone who's expecting, or even new parents, what would be the biggest thing you'd want to share?
37:19
Angela: I?
37:21
Theresa: would say that this applies to kind of all stages of life, but when you're in a life-changing stage of life, that it always pays to have a warrior mentality versus a fear-based mentality.
37:35
Theresa: Because it's very easy to be fearful of the stages of pregnancy.
37:39
Theresa: It's very it's kind of almost easy to be fearful of the outcome and it's you know, you can be fearful of labor, you can be fearful of new, newborn hood.
37:49
Theresa: You can be fearful of having a toddler.
37:50
Theresa: You can be fearful of having a toddler, you can be fearful of having a teenager.
37:52
Theresa: There's just so many things to be fearful of and have that kind of mentality.
37:56
Theresa: But it doesn't pay like to do some more.
37:59
Theresa: You know to, to push through and have a warrior mentality where, yes, we will tackle that.
38:04
Theresa: Like, yes, this will pass, this won't last forever, we can get through this.
38:08
Theresa: I think that there's always a benefit to that.
38:13
Theresa: It was when I took a birthing class.
38:15
Theresa: They said do not get in the fear loop.
38:18
Theresa: When you start contractions, Don't fear the next contraction, because you're not going to be able to ride it if you're fearful even before it starts.
38:26
Theresa: And they just said you know, just know we'll end and have a warrior mentality and I I think that's just very, very important, because if you have a can-do mentality, it will serve you better than having a fearful or hesitant mentality.
38:46
Angela: Yeah, definitely.
38:47
Angela: I agree with that.
38:48
Angela: So much it's.
38:50
Angela: Yeah, just having that mindset shift can make all the difference.
38:52
Angela: Yes, can I ask you how you felt when you saw the photos after your birth?
39:00
Theresa: Oh, I just thought they were so beautiful and it was so nice to to see it from a different vantage point.
39:06
Theresa: I just to have the experience in your head is is just not enough.
39:10
Theresa: It's so monumentous.
39:12
Theresa: I think, just to see it from a different point of view, like I think in one of the photos that you took it was my favorite one I'm just hunched over the baby and it's just me holding the baby and that's all I see.
39:22
Theresa: And I see my midwife sitting on the floor smiling at me and my best friend is behind me and she's got her arms up in victory.
39:30
Theresa: And you know, that wasn't my experience and it's nice to see that, holistically, this was the shared experience and I just I loved them and I'm so appreciative and thankful that you did that for me.
39:43
Theresa: Thank you.
39:47
Angela: Oh my gosh.
39:48
Angela: Well, you're welcome.
39:49
Angela: It was my honor.
39:50
Angela: All of the births that I attend are really just such an honor to to witness you know, you claiming your power and birthing your baby.
39:58
Angela: It's so magical, so thank you for letting me witness.
40:01
Angela: Um, yeah, it was such an honor chatting with you today, teresa, and hearing hearing your share your story.
40:10
Angela: Thanks for taking the time to chat with me and come on today.
40:14
Theresa: Thank you so much I'm glad my mom was here too.
40:17
Angela: Me too.
40:17
Angela: Before you go, I just want to remind you I have a ton of resources for pregnancy and birth.
40:25
Angela: If you're pregnant, whether you're a first time mom or if this is your fifth baby, I want you to check out the show notes, because I have some free trainings and free downloads that you can sign up for, as well as the link to access my labor of love, a comprehensive, self-paced online childbirth education course.
40:43
Angela: I created this course specifically for moms who don't want to be told what to do, regardless of where you're birthing or who you're birthing with, and I'd honestly love to teach you everything that I know so that you can prepare for an autonomous birth experience and prepare to step into your role as the leader of your birth journey.
41:02
Angela: So click to the show notes, check out all of those links and, if you ever have any questions, feel free to DM me at my main birth over on Instagram.