Latest / Shared Light / Ep. 38 - The 90's Called & Our Kids Answered: Style, Identity & 2 Chunky Boys
Transcript
- Dustie & JR: Greetings all. Welcome to another episode of Shared Light with Dustie and JR. I am obviously JR. And I'm Dustie. Welcome back to another fun filled episode. Kids and dogs chaos in the background. But it is it is what it is at this point. If you happen to hear some weird noises coming from the background. Our kids are on one. The dogs are on one. Yeah. good little segue into some bit of news. Yep. Pretty exciting around here a little bit. Punkin had her puppies. So we are on our second round of puppies. Yep. but she only had two. Only two, yep, for her first litter, which they're humongous, but they're too small. So they are they are massive little porkers for what they are. we were trying to just I think we probably have it written down somewhere, but we were just kind of comparing the two sizes of of litters at this stage between Peachy and Punkin and Peachy's babies did not get the size that these two are for at least two to three weeks, I feel like. At least two weeks. Yeah. But she had both boys. So Peachy had all girls. Punkin had all boys. I feel like is rare, but it's a little strange. Yeah. But Peachy is well, they call her a micro or pocket beagle because she's she's about ten inches, I think. Yeah, she's definitely smaller than the other two. so I kind of assumed that her babies would be smaller, but they definitely were compared to Punkin's two that she has now. Punkin's boys. You can tell are definitely boys. They're so chunky. Because all they do is eat and sleep. They just look like big old bellies with like little arms, little feet sticking out. so yeah, it's been a little bit of a it has not been nearly as chaotic as the first round. No. She's done a lot better with her babies. Yeah, I think she's a lot more confident and she's not as anxious about being mom and just kinda dives in and I do feel it. I do feel sorry to cut you off. I do feel like the biggest difference has been she's very overprotective of her nest. She is, yeah. So my girls have not been able to do a whole lot this round with the puppies. No. So her little welping area is here in our bedroom. and so she currently doesn't want her sisters. her human sisters coming into the room at all. So they're only able to kinda hold and see the babies when she's outside gone potty, but she's very protective, but I feel like she's getting better. Yeah, she did go out and see her sisters today. Yeah. A little bit ago actually. I think she's getting a little bit more comfortable. She did actually go by the other dogs as well and just kind of sniff them and make sure that They were I mean basically kinda like saying hi. Yeah. I mean her tail was wagging, she was but I mean, I feel like it took Peachy weeks to get to that point. Yeah, it was She wanted to go outside for five minutes. Yeah. I mean it it was at least three weeks before she was at the point where she was just that where she just kinda came out and roamed around and sniffed and seen her environment and And was interested in snacks and and Punkin's only four days postpartum, so our babies are only four days old and she's already out and about and she's not as worried, I think, about them I think she maybe feels more secure. Probably because she is behind a closed door. Yeah. And I think because Peachy decided to have hers in our living room, that was her nesting area that she chose. And so it left her kinda out in the open, I think. Well and even even when we moved Peachy, it was like a battle to get her to move. Yeah, so I think she just feels more secure and confident. But it's it's a different dynamic. Yeah, she's a different dog. The puppies themselves it's kinda strange 'cause she's very more in tune, I feel like, than when Peachy was when they were puppies. She really knows where she's at. In relation to where they're at. Yeah. She's not like r rolling over on them or anything. which with Peachy it was a constant battle of trying to round her babies up because she didn't know how to lay with them or anything. Yeah. So it it has been a little bit easier, I feel like. I know you're getting up a couple of times a night just when the babies get lost, which I mean that's the other side of it. Is we're comfortable enough with her leaving a blanket in there with her and the babies where we couldn't have done that with Peachy at all. No. No. She would have not been able to get out if they were under the blanket or rolled on top of But it's just it's different this time around and easier for us, I would say. Yeah. She is so hands on. Well and she's eating and drinking and doing everything she's supposed to. Yeah, they're all to a good one. I will say that like the biggest difference though is that she's a that over protection part. 'Cause she did even yesterday one of them was stuck a little bit and I went in to grab her and I think she must have thought I was gonna try and do something 'cause she growled at me for a second. I like, Hey, what are you doing? And then she mellowed out but Yeah. My girls for sure cannot even step in to the room. But you know, she sees them as like her equal. Those are her sisters, not her alphas. You know what I mean? I mean, she let my mom in there yesterday and she was excited to see grandma and let her hold the babies. So but I think with the girls it's just that's her playmates. Yeah, and they really did when they were when she was a puppy, they were still little. Mhm. I mean you figure that was what, three years ago. Yeah, and they just rolled around with her on the floor and played with toys and so that's kinda their dynamic. So she's just more protective, I think, of her babies with them. she'll come around. I'm not worried about that. She's not nipping at or mean or anything. She's just kinda letting know, like, hey, I don't want you near my babies right now. Yeah. I mean, so it's been pretty s off limits for them, but we have been letting them see them again when she goes out. Yeah. They're holding them and I think they were a little sad at first, but I think they get it. Yeah, and they I mean, we still have Piggly, which Piggly's three months old. it's gonna be close to three months now. She keeps them busy. But they're not lacking in the puppy department. And she has the same dynamic with them that Punkin did Yeah. Peachy was never that way with them because she was always Mm mm. I feel I don't know. She wasn't like we mentioned before, she was always kind of a Karen. She's very reserved and so she never really played a whole lot. Petey did. But Petey really gravitated towards the other two dogs. Yeah. So and the girls were just not as interested then as they are now. Yeah. So it really is that dynamic for at least Punkin and the kids that I mean they're litter mates. They they all grew up together. So Yeah, I mean she doesn't want them around just like she don't want the other dogs in her kennel either. Like get away from my babies. So that's pretty normal, I think. so yeah, outside of that, things have been Normalizing I feel like. Yeah. evening out a little bit. I mean we're still dealing with everything else outside of but I mean at this point. Well yeah, I mean but at this point it's it's that we don't dwell on it and we move forward and yeah. things will eventually work themselves out or they won't. I mean it's one of those things. You you're presented with challenges and you deal with them accordingly. So kinda go with the flow and figure it out. then along the way. But that has given rise to with us having well, I guess me more than anybody, really focusing, as I mentioned, my birthday. I which you know, turning forty five, you start to look back on and being at home, I look at my kids now at age you know, ten, twelve, eleven and twelve. my daughter's ten, but she'll be almost like next month. But I start looking at, what was I doing at that age, you know, some of those things. And so I was born in the eighties. We were born in the eighties. Yep. Dating ourselves. Exactly. I was born nineteen eighty Well I was I was I was eighty one. but you know most of my formative years were in the nineties. Yeah. Right? so you figure by the time I'm their age it's, you know, ninety one, ninety two. well what was in style back then? Parachute pants. Yeah. the JNCO jeans. As you yeah, as you so baggy pants, sagging as you progress later in, the later part of the nineties, the skate look was really in vans, the JNCO jeans, platform shoes, oversized flannels. The baby doll tops. Yeah. and grunge was making its Which is the segue into what we're gonna talk to talk about a little bit today. My girls, surprisingly enough, are really queuing into that style of nineties grunge right now. They really are. Yeah. so much so that the other day I heard that my daughter's really into Nirvana right now. Yep. the other day I was shocked that she was playing some was it Slipknot? Yeah. And on top of just the musical side of it. Yeah. Her styling cues for what she wants to her little personality starting to come out. Yep. So she's really looking to her style. Yeah. I mean she's ditching a lot of the modern I guess, motifs and really really diving headfirst into a lot of what made grunge what it was in the nineties, which it was kind of funny 'cause we got into a little bit of a discussion about how grunge was anti cool in the nineties. It was the that was the whole purpose of it. Right now it's very mainstream. So it's an interesting dynamic for me. We always called it alternative. Right. So but like The alternative kids and I was one for a while. They were the ones out in the back parking lot of the school smoking and you know. So they weren't necessarily the popular but I feel like now it like that it's come back around, it's the cool thing. Yeah, and it's it's funny 'cause I mean I've obviously as dad I'm gonna razz her a little bit about it. So she enjoys that though. I Your guys' banter I was, alluding to the fact that she's going against everything that grunge embodies. Yeah. Because it's very popular and mainstream right now. And back then it became popular, but it was never mainstream. And the whole point of it was we're anti mainstream. We're anti popular. That's yeah, the whole point of it. I mean, it was essentially rebellious. I mean you could equate it to what punk was in like the seventies or eighties or whatever. Yeah. but it's been kind of funny because I did not grow up in the alternative circle in the nineties. I know a lot of the music just because it's the nineties and yeah well it's popular. Yeah, so you hear it everywhere. But I really do feel like right now this is mom's time to shine. Yeah. Because you've been doing and I feel like I've kind of always carried over a little bit of that style, just 'cause I mean, the I've always tied flannels around my waist since I was in high school. Like that's just my thing. I've always loved, Converse chucks, platform shoes. and band tees. Like they've always been my thing for as long as you've known me. And so That's kinda just been my style since. Yeah, but your band tees then were the Who and the Doors and the Rolling Stones, not Nirvana and Metallica. Well, and so she's yeah. I've lost a couple pair of Converse to her already. My favorite band tee she just wore yesterday, even though we're supposed to share it. She thinks it's hers. I've lost a couple flannels to her. She did say you gave it to her. She's no. So yeah, I've lost some of my clothing to her because she likes it, she wants it and but they're also really into thrifting, so we found some good pieces for them thrifting and our youngest has a little bit of a different take on it. I feel like hers is more of a she calls it the hot topic style. Yeah, it's like a I wanna say it's like grunge, nineties grunge mixed with kind of anime girl style. is what she she's kinda combined the two to make her own. She really likes the anime makeup, like the a lot of blush and like cheeky girl kind of thing. she really is into leg warmers and platform shoes and but she doesn't do really the flannels and the band tees. But she really she wants the cutesy shirts. But she wants them distressed and she wants distressed shirts. Yeah. So she's kind of making her own which I like to see 'cause we talked about it before that she's trying to find herself and her kind of style and who she is and what she likes, not based on her big sister and what she likes. So It's kinda fun to see I've just kind of let them both be who they wanna be and although I did hear them yesterday when they were getting ready to go with their grandma comparing notes. like this looks really good. This doesn't this Yeah. So they're getting to that age where they are very much finding what they want in terms of who they wanna be and yeah, how they feel comfortable. It's my time to shine. It really is into makeup now. It really is your time to shine. and thrifting, which I hate. And thrifting. And and me and my mom love. And it's good for me that they're into it on the dad's side and the financial side because thrifting is gonna be less expensive. Yeah, Hot Topic's not anymore, but No, well I never really was. I will say that Hot Topic was never one of those stores where They're not bad though. I mean You can still get deals there. We didn't. We went with my mom last time. They had like buy one, get one free clearance. But or buy one get three free clearance. So we did want to take this opportunity for you parents out there. Yeah. To give us or to at least have Dustie give you some tips on how to thrift. how to be budget friendly when you're going to outings. things to look for, you know, Like we said, it very much seems right now like the nineties is very in and popular. So even for you people that are not parents that may be from our era, that may have some old clothes laying around, right now is your time to really hit this on eBay or wherever you're gonna sell some of this stuff. Yeah, like Vinted is the new app that people are using. but even, you know, if you're thrifting my kids have developed a love for Pinterest recently because that's where they're finding all of their outfit ideas and their makeup ideas and they can put this together with this. And so when we go thrifting, they're looking for specific pieces like, you know, the long sleeve underneath to wear underneath their band tees or you know, cheap T shirts that they can put holes in in distress or my daughter bought a tie. She yeah, she wore it yesterday. She wore her long sleeve and then her band tee over the top. My my band. It was a collared long sleeve. Yes. Under the band tee. Yes. And then she wore her tie. I thought it was really cute. And then her, of course, like her acid wash black jeans. Yes, and she's wearing which is this is what's hilarious, hilarious. So she how many pairs of chucks have we've gotten them throughout the years probably. so I have some platform chucks. Black just black and white platform chucks. And I I can wear kids sizes. So I had bought me a pair, but then I bought them matching. So they each had a pair of platform chucks. I just got rid of them this past summer, because they never wore They hated Well no I bought like two years ago. That's what I was getting at. So they're for Years refused to wear any of the chucks that we get. Yeah. They didn't. Mm-mm. They had chucks. And they had vans. and I've since gotten rid of them because they would not wear them. So I think it's funny now because they want Yeah, my daughter came in the other day and said, Well, I want these shoes. I'm like, You had those shoes. Number one. She came in my closet and stole a pair of mine. I'm like, and Your mom gave them away or threw them away or sold them or whatever. Yeah, so we gave them away. Yeah. And now two months, three months later, they're all about Chuck Taylors. Yeah. They're all about vans. Keep in mind that six months ago I couldn't get my daughter to leave the house in anything but Crocs. She won't touch her Crocs now. She hasn't worn them, so I'm gonna have to wear because they fit me, but then we bought her Crocs for Christmas because that's all she wore. I mean we bought her some nice ones because she was wearing out our other one. And she didn't like socks with crocs. Or she did, or can't remember. No, she did she didn't like socks. So we bought her like the lined ones. So that she could wear like in the winter without socks. I don't know. Anyway, she won't touch now, so and our youngest was really into Nikes. The pandas. She loved Nike pandas. Now it's But that I mean that's how it goes. I remember how many times I've changed my style. Since like middle school through high school. I've always done kind of the nineties grunge, like I said, up even to this day. But you know, a lot of my childhood I spent in Utah. So we would go to the rodeos and, you know, I went through a cowgirl phase and and then living in California, it's like I went through the overalls with the wife beater tank tops and the Timberlands, you know. So I think about all the times that you kind of change up your style back and forth. I don't think I ever changed. I don't think you did. But as girls it's different. So I feel like we'll probably go through quite a few of those if not changes, like adaptations into I still like a little bit of this, but now I'm liking this or Well, I mean, I do say I will say this about the whole thing is as a dad, I really am loving seeing the confidence that they're building around being able to explore some of these. And my daughter, my oldest, has always been one that did not care what she looked like, did not care what she wore. I mean, she gave zero Fs. And now she doesn't want to leave the house without her hair done. She's very particular about how things go together, what they look like. Yeah. Which it was bound to happen, I feel like, but at the same time I like that she's got the confidence to really just own what she wants to be. She owns what she likes. She doesn't really care what anybody thinks either. You know. She puts it on and she feels good and she's like she doesn't care if anybody likes it. Right. And my little one is getting to that point where she wants to wear what she wants to wear and Yeah. her style is unique enough though that people are really gravitating towards it in the fact that, like that's really creative that you came up with that and She's very creative, just in general. But yeah, she had a pair of sweats the other day that she hasn't gained any weight, so they fit her in the waist. But she's but she's taller now, so they were like capris at that point and she's like, no, I'm gonna keep She cut into shorts and then she uses the bottom half for her leg warmers. She just wears her little sweatshorts with the leg warmers and layers it up with a band T or whatever. And yeah. Yeah, but it she's so confident with her little pink platform she goes back to that style though of the nineties where you wore the big bottoms and Baggy style look and Yeah. She made flare out 'cause she I mean, they were sweats kind of cinched at the bottom. But then when she cut it's really wide up here 'cause it was like her thigh area, you know, the thigh. So she just flipped it. So it's like tight up here and then it flares. She was so funny about it. Very proud of herself. But to kinda go back to what we were saying, again, right now, if you have any of that stuff or are looking for any of that stuff, it's now's the time. Yeah, now's the time to really jump on that. I actually because the nineties have been so popular, I started looking at some of the clothes that I wore back then. And I mean it's some of like the Ben Davis stuff that I wore and some of those I mean you're talking like super spendy stuff now. I think the JNCO jeans we looked at were almost $200 When I remember buying some of that stuff like Kmart and you know what I mean? it was not meant to it was workwear. It wasn't Yeah. But and the I mean the Chuck Taylors thing, we wore those 'cause they were just cheap back in the day. It wasn't even 'cause they were necessarily in style. Yeah, like we couldn't afford Jordans. That was the big thing, so we got ch you know, we got Chuck. Or you got vans 'cause they were cheap. Or you got airwalks was another big one, which I think is made a huge comeback. Yeah. Skater shoes. I mean the thing about the skater shoes is they were always really comfortable. Yeah, they were. Yeah, it's all coming back. So I'm enjoying it just because I have girls and so they're into the makeup and As I get older, I'm not as much into it, into the makeup and the hair. So I just get to help them be who they wanna be and Well, and I mentioned the other thing to this is that it is popular enough that a lot of the music that we listened to back then is coming up is really it was funny to me 'cause the other day she took over my Spotify playlist and we were listening to you know, stuff she wanted to listen to. And it was like literally if you took like best of the nineties C D and put it on. I mean that's what we were listening to. Yeah. Yeah. I mean Nirvana, Sir Mix a lot. Sir Mix a lot. She really likes Sir Mix a lot. There was another one that we were listening to that I was shocked that she listened to. Was it Soul Asylum? Was it no Soul Asylum? I know she listens to Slipknot. I don't remember, but it's kinda cool to Typo negative? That's the one that really that I was shocked she was listening to the other day was typo negative. I was like, What the heck? Yeah. Like this was kinda far out there even in the nineties. Yeah. But a lot of that music, I mean she sings her little heart out. It for me it's nice 'cause it's music that I know. It's not a terrible music from today that I don't like. Yeah. And both of them. I mean both of them are like they can sing all of these songs. They're unfortunately you get you do get stuck with some of the boy band stuff that was happening back then as well. Yeah. They like a mixture of She's pretty eclectic though. Yeah. I mean she she's got a pretty far spectrum of music that she listens to. There's not much that she doesn't find that Yeah. Our youngest links some of that too, but she does like a lot more I would say like pop and hip hop and that way. Of the pop nineties than Yeah. Like the alternative nineties I would say. Yeah. But as a parent and really just because I'm trying to encourage them to do what they want and I also like the music that they're playing, I really do make it a point to not discount what they're listening to. I mean every now and then I may make a comment of like, do you even know who this is? But I try not to be like a gatekeeper. You know, and downplay The music that they're picking and The styles that they're picking just because it's a quick way to create a wall where your kids don't want to share things with you. Yeah. Yeah, it can be a really good opportunity to bond with them. And it has been, I think, for us to have them share that love of the music, that we like also. maybe not all of it, but No maybe not. But I I mean I think back to like even me as a kid and my mom and my mom really grew up in like the seventies, right? Because she was born in the sixties, but she grew up in the seventies. And we share a lot of the same music when I was growing up. Yeah. Because as the cycle goes, I feel like every twenty or so years that stuff becomes popular again. Yeah. so I listen to a lot of I'm I didn't take stylistic cues from that era by any means, but I listened to a lot of the music for sure of the seventies and sixties, and stuff that we both enjoyed that made it more enjoyable for her that we were able to bond together with. And my dad and I share a common bond on some things, it's a different kind of music just because of where he's from and yeah. But it's something that I still think back on and I think to myself, I mean, this is the time that I need to connect with my kids because they're gonna remember this twenty years from now. Yeah. But I mean as we get older, and as their styles change, I mean I imagine to your point that they'll probably transition at some point to something else. Because trends and styles and things come and go. Yeah. And I mean, I think our kids let some of that what's popular or what's trending influence them. But I think mostly they're influenced by their music and just kind of their own finding what they like. you know, even if it's not mainstream, even if it's not what's popular or you know, 'cause I feel like our oldest was kind of into this stuff before it even got real mainstream and popular right now. Yeah. I mean she was she was into the wearing the ties and she was starting to kind of experiment with the things like that that she liked before it really became super popular. so I feel like they kinda just well, and our youngest just kind of creates what her own whatever she really she really is When she's in her good mental space, she really is what I would consider like a trendsetter because she really does things that are not so far outside of the realm of like in this case, right? It's not so far out of the realm of the mainstream. Yeah. But it is a take on it that is very individual to her. That I could see being very popular, especially with just the popularity surrounding especially like K pop and some of those things. Cause I some of some of her look and some of the stuff that she gravitates to, you can kind of see the inspiration of some K pop, but some grunge, but some anime. So it's very like blended in a way that really she could. if she really applied herself, she could probably create things like that. Yeah. New styles, new clothing, which I don't think is anything that she's necessarily passionate about, but maybe. She at some point. Well maybe I mean right now she's really into cooking, but Yeah. cooking for her sister. I mean really for her it's all about creation. Like even with She's always been creative though. So in whatever she's doing with cooking, with you know, clothing, with Yeah, I mean she made up her own ice cream, which was crazy to me. Because she just kinda thought about it, went for it and her sister loved it. Yeah. She's just always been that way though. You think about even with her drawing her art, she'll just think about it and then she can start drawing it. And so but she's just creative. She has that creative mind. So So it really just Finding ways to let her explore that. And as a parent you want to do that not only because you want her to find out who she is and who she eventually wants to be, but you also want to support that creativity and support her in a manner That allows her to continue to develop new ideas, develop things. Because eventually, I mean, she might grow a passion for fashion or grow a passion for I I mean, for years she said that her passion was, in wanting to be a vet. She wanted to be a vet. but really over the last probably six months, I mean, she just had a conversation with you the other day about. Wanting to be a chef. Yeah, part of her school work was setting a long term goal and It was to be a chef, so I don't know, and that may change. I mean, you think about how many times you changed what you wanted to do when you grew up when you were younger, you know. There's so many different things I wanted to be and had ideas about. But But if I know she'll do something creative. But if you think about that, right? You had long term goals and you had things that you wanted to be. But as we've talked about in this podcast previously, the one thing that you always went back to was you wanna be a mom. Yeah. You wanna be That was my main goal. Right. Which is probably not uncommon, but what I'm getting at is I think somewhere in all of the stuff that she's had going on and all the stuff that she's she probably likely has something like that that she just not has been able to express yet. And and I do think you're probably spot on in the fact that it's probably something that's going to be very tied to her creativity because that's when you really see her get into like I call it the zone. Right, where you get so hyper focused that you tune everything out and this is like your soul focus. Yeah. That's where she thrives. And my oldest to a point is that way, but she's more that way with music and She really needs a lot of structure like I do to keep momentum. Yeah. She's her brain's a lot like yours and I think that she'll end up doing something more Where she's doing a lot of mental work. She's figuring a lot out and she's solving puzzles and she's, you know, doing that type of thing 'cause that's where she thrives. You know, you sit her down with something that needs to be built and Yeah, I mean she'll figure out Yeah, she she figures it out. You know, and she enjoys that. So I think she's gonna be more Who knows, like engineering or robotics or those type of she really enjoys. So we'll see. It's interesting to see how their little personalities are coming out and their styles and their Well then it's a good call back for us because Yeah. I again a lot of this came up because I was actively thinking about I mean at my age Where was I and what was I doing when I was that age? Mm-hmm. A lot of the music they're listening to now was really popular. A lot of the stuff that they're looking for to wear now was really popular. so for me is a lot of nostalgia in that. But it also helps me reflect on This is when A lot of they're going to be influenced by a lot of things. This is where as a parent We really need to ensure that we're supporting them in a manner that allows them to explore what they need to explore. Because as we mentioned on the last episode, like we're trying to raise people that are gonna be successful in adulthood. Yeah. I think you've mentioned it before, like you don't ever want your kids to say that they survive their childhood or whatever, right? Yeah. I don't want them to have a childhood that they have to recover from. Right. Right. So, And I mean nobody's perfect and as parents I know that we're not perfect. but When things like this come up, And when you're able to take out and zoom out and just look at the context of everything that's happening and reflect on what's happening. Like age twelve, age eleven for me was I mean you could point back to that was when I started making some poor decisions. Yeah. and Not that I'm scared that my kids will follow the same path or anything like that. But I also think about, I mean, what did influence that? What what type of things can I look back on now and say, well, you know, maybe that was a cause, or maybe that was something that was going on or maybe this or that or or the other, right? Yeah. And as hindsight can be twenty twenty. I also need to be cognizant of the fact that I'm not gonna be also able to be so protective that I am going to push them to do some of those things. And we've got a long road to go and Really I'm just happy right now that they are both getting comfortable enough in their skin that these are the years when you really start seeing kids who they're going to ultimately become. This is when this starts to to really form and and you really start to see how they're going to promote that. inner self, I guess. Or at least how they're going to show themselves to the world. Yeah. And it's really especially for girls, I think a time when they're just starting to develop their self worth and their self esteem. And so I think it's just important that we use these opportunities like in music and fashion and whatever they're interested in in the moment. To just connect with them and Not really redirect, but just be in their life, you know, be an active participant in not just being their parent and telling them what to do or making sure their needs are met, but going along this journey with them. Yeah. And getting to know them right now in this moment, what they like, what they don't like, who they're becoming, what they think about All different things, what they think about themselves. you know, I think that's a key part in them developing the skills that they need. Especially I think with mental health and their self worth. just being an active part of that as their parents. So that they have, that support and they have that. knowledge that I have my parents with me. I can be who I want to be when I wanna be it. you know, that is a main driver in I think a lot of success that people have later on in their life is when, they're so confident in I have my my support system. I know I can be and I can do and I have that confidence because of that. So I think that's just important that we are that for them right now. Yeah. And what I was gonna say is right now in this season in particular, this is probably going to be one of the easiest times it is to find things that are relatable that we can actually have some input on that we both like. I mean it's a common thing. It's something that we experience that we know that we can lend some insight to. Oftentimes when you're a parent, you are Totally lost on a lot of the trends. You're totally lost on why things are popular. I mean the six seven thing from a couple years ago or a year ago or whatever, I still don't understand. There's a lot of stuff just in mainstream media right now that I don't care to understand or understand. so this is one of those things when you can actually connect you can actually connect in a manner that is different than just that parent child relationship. And you may hear one of our puppies. just for context, he likes to make that noise when he's eating. he gets very into his his appetite and his food. so but I what I was saying is this is the time to really and whatever that may look like for you as a parent and whatever that may look like even for somebody that doesn't have kids that may want to relate to kids right now. You know, nineties are super popular. If you know anything about the era, it's a good time to connect with preteens on that level because you might have some insights into what the fashion was like, what the culture was like, what was in the music part especially. Movies, I would say not as much right now. Although my daughter is getting pretty into that nineties horror too. But Yeah, they are. my youngest doesn't like it, but no, I think it's just it's a common ground, I think, that you can connect with your kids or your nieces, your nephews, your whoever in your life. it's a good gateway I think to open up a lot of communication. Yep with them. Which I feel like at this age is going to be crucial in their development if they have that communication with their parents or their support system. because you will allow them to navigate through or even navigate by a lot of the dangers and a lot of the things that kids get can get into. Yeah, I mean like I said, I started making some very poor choices. right around this age. Maybe even a little younger, but this is the age when I really started making poor choices. Yeah. But you know, outside of that, we continue on. we are actively looking to enjoy this season with our kids, especially my wife. Like I said, it's definitely her time to shine right now. Mm-hmm. Fun. And, continuing with these two brand new little additions to the households that are very easy right now because they're not that mobile. No. Mama does everything right now. I imagine it'll be like this for at least another week before they're at least, yeah. kinda starting to move around a little bit and trying to to get into things in their kennel at least. probably two or three weeks before they're starting the terror That is puppies. Yeah. But I do challenge our listeners to to take a moment and share some of those old playlists with your kids or your nieces or nephews or you might be surprised that they may know more than you would anticipate about the music that you're playing. Yep. So with that, I do want to call attention to our website, www.sharedlightpodcast.com. we do have a shop tab. we do have a way to get in contact with us. follow us on all of your favorite social media platforms. like, share, and subscribe to this video. or this Podcast on your favorite platform. And yeah, we wish you a blessed week and we will catch you on the next one.