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The 50 States of Conspiracy: Minnesota · Conspiracy! The Show

• 0:10
  Speaker 1: Win True Insurance, did I true? I'm a check out.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Both good us. Oh hey, everybody, welcome to Conspiracy The Show.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: I'm your host, Adam Todd Brown joining me as co host.
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: This week, we got a guest, Andy Sell is here.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: How's it going, Hi, it's going all right. You all
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: know Andy. Everyone knows Andy. He's on so many podcasts.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: You don't even like this band most importantly.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's that's the top one probably which.
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: We host together, Look Good for the Boys, which he
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: hosts without me like a fucking trader.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: Sorry man, Yeah, sorry, And we actually have new episodes,
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: by the way of Looking for the Boys for the
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: first time in a very long time.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: This is not the time for plugs. Andy.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: Oh shit, that's later. I'm sorry. Top it.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: So we're doing a fun thing because I don't know
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: if people know this, but America's turning two hundred and
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: fifty Andy, have you heard about this?
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry? What too?
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: Fifty two hundred and fifty years old? The old USA.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: That's unnatural. Nothing should live that long. Shut it down.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: I mean, it feels like we're headed there, doesn't it.
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I'm I'm kind of surprised we made it.
• 1:36
  Speaker 1: To two fifty.
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: To be honest, we're limping toward two fifty.
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this country's entire It's like it's just a toddler
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: with a gun that it has been that way the
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: whole time. That usually doesn't result in living a long time.
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, now it's like a dementia adult senior
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: with a gun. Yeah, which is like a toddler with
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: a gun, same thing.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: I mean, And that's not even a metaphor, that's just
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: like who's in charge?
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: Literally, Yes, a dementia adult senior with a gun. Correct. So,
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: because me, Andy, everyone I know is so excited about
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: America's two hundred and fiftieth birthday, we are doing a
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: special series here at Conspiracy Show called the Fifty States
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: of Conspiracy, where each episode will be dedicated to a
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: different state in the Union. Here we got fifty of them. Ooh,
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: and it will cover the various conspiracies and urban legends
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: and things of the like tied to that state. Are
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: we going to get to all fifty states? Probably not.
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: Me and Alex Schmidt had a podcast once upon a
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: time called Your State Is Insane, where it was a
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: similar sort of thing, but more state history related, where
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: we would go through the crazy historical things that happened
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: in any given state with a guest who was from
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: that state. We were going in alphabetical order, and andy
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: when we got to Connecticut, we were like, who the
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: fuck knows anyone from Connecticut.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: That is really not far into things?
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, no.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: To be caught off guard, I actually know some people
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: from Connecticut. I could probably put you in touch with
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: some connetic I don't Connecticuttians. I don't know how they
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: refer to themselves Connecticutters.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: Connetics, contis comsensitive Conneticians. I don't know.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's gotta be something weird because they all they
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: have a C in their state name. They fully just
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: skip over. So cucumber sandwiches, right, That's what I know
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: about Connecticut.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: The only thing I know well of Connecticut is women's basketball.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: I know New Haven style pizza. They call it a pizza.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: Oh. I smoked crack with a guy from Connecticut once,
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: But who hasn't.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: I mean, even the Connecticut son are moving to Houston.
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: So yeah, still got the Huskies.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: Though the Connecticut bubble has burst, my friends, I mean
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: they do still have the Huskies.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and the men's team is pretty solid, just not
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: as solid as that women's team. But hey, we're not
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: talking about Connecticut.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: No, we're not. Indeed we're not.
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: We are kicking this off by covering the great state
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: of Minnesota because that's where Andy lives. It's where I live,
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: not where Andy's from. You're from Iowa, right, yes, yes,
• 4:22
  Speaker 2: So maybe Andy will be back for the Iowa episode,
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: provided I cannot book Hannah Stulky or anyone from Slipknot.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: You know, Ron Livingston is from there. I bet you
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: could get Ron Livingston on the show.
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: It goes Hannah Stulky, Slipknot, Andy Sell, Ron Livingston fourth.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: Ah Ron Livingston's right after me.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, I'll get him next. But yeah, we're covering
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: Minnesota this time around.
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: Hell yeah, Minnesota is great.
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: How do you like living in Minnesota?
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: I personally love Minnesota. I lived in South Dakota for
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: more than a decade, and I I say all the time,
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: the most enjoyable thing to do in South Dakota is
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: leave and go to Minneapolis. So I spent a ton
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: of time in Minneapolis when I lived in South Dakota.
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: I fucking love it there.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't want to throw shade, but I feel
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: like that's the case for a lot of places in
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: the Upper Midwest. The north is the best part of
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: living here is our proximity to Minneapolis. Minneapolis rules is terrific.
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: I love it. I absolutely adore it.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, if I was to move back to the Midwest,
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: it would be Omaha or Minneapolis, and I would lean
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: Minneapolis because of the availability of weed. Omaha is still
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: in Nebraska.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: Omaha would probably secede from Nebraska if Omaha could.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: Anyway, let's talk about Minnesota. We got a lot to
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: get through.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: There's a lot going on.
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: The first group of things I want to cover are
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: local legends and or things dealing with local institutions. Despite
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: my proximity to Minnesota, knowing a lot of people who
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: lived in Minnesota at the time all of that, I
• 6:05
  Speaker 2: had never heard of Old Saint Anne's pass.
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: No, this is a new one for me. And it's
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: funny because I just actually when I read these notes,
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: I was like, I have four books that I've bought
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: since moving here that are all like local Minnesota legends
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: and paranormal stories, haunted lakes, stuff like that. Local cryptids.
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: I have four books that I just anytime I see one,
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: like a thrift story used bookstore, I just pick it up. Yeah,
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: I don't think this one was in any of those,
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: or at least not any of the ones that I
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: had read. So this is a new one to me too.
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: It seems like this history exists solely in the head
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: of one man, and I think that's why it doesn't
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: show up in any of those books. Okay, because this
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: legend it goes way way back, but people didn't start
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: talking about it until two thousand and one. Here's what
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: happened Old Saint Anne's Pass. It is but one of
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: more more than twenty thousand bridges and overpasses in Minnesota.
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: Doesn't look any different from any other overpass or bridge
• 7:08
  Speaker 2: in Minnesota, but it does seem like it's the only
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: one that doubles as a portal to an alternate supernatural universe.
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: I feel like there's a couple that do that. There
• 7:20
  Speaker 2: might be, and I'm just not from there.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: There's a lot of bridges, like you covered, there's a
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: lot of bridges here. There's a lot of you know.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: It's so I feel like there's more than one that
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: does that.
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, people from Minneapolis heard me say that part and
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: are like done listening. This guy knows nothing. There's four
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: of those here. So it's on Highway fifty five, crosses
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: over the Sioux Line railroad, halfway between the towns of
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: Kimball and Watkins. Tell them conspiracy the show sent you.
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: I do think I've driven at least through Kimball and Watkins.
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: Those names sound very familiar. Me and my friend Doug
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: got horribly lost going to an audio slave concert at
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: First Avenue once. Maybe we passed through. Here's the thing.
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: It seemed like we weren't gonna make it in time
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: given how lost we got, and we made it early.
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: Maybe we passed through this fucking portal. Ooh, maybe that's
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: what happened. Yeah, so Old Saint Anne's didn't get its
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: name until a Sterns County, Minnesota man named Dan Becker
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: convinced the Minnesota legislature to change the name in two
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: thousand and one. It's named after a church and Becker
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: family cemetery that used to be very near that same location, So.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: It just didn't have a name before. Apparently it was
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: just this unnamed fucking pass.
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: Okay, well, what happened. It seems like and I'll link
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: to an article about this, it's worth a read. This
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: is a quite the tail. There are lots of twists
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: and turns from what I'm gathering just reading this article
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: a time or two. It seems like Dan Becker entered
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: into a dispute with the new owners of the land
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: and where this cemetery was. It seems like he wanted
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: to protect that cemetery in some way and lost that battle.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: And his next course of action to honor the family
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: name was get the legislature to rename this overpass instead.
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: And it seems like everyone was like, yeah, whatever, just
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: who cares call it the old Saint Anne's Pass? No
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: one cares. But after he got this bridge renamed, he
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: starts cranking out. I haven't listed in the notes as
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: self published books and short stories about the alleged history
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: of Old Saint Anne's Pass. Uh, It's more like a
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: crazy dude writing in his notebooks. These are not books
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: you can buy. The article has a couple pages from them.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: It looks like what would be in the books if
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: you walked in someone's front room and it was just
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: lined with notebooks all along the walls. Like in seven Yeah,
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: like yeah, you're like, oh no, what's this up to.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: This is what he's up to is concocting the history
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: of Old Saint Anne's Pass.
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 10:06
  Speaker 2: He mentions in one of his books that prior to
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: the man made bridge, souls used a spiritual gait that
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: had been created along this same blessed cemetery and church land.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: Which is he saying, the souls use the bridge now
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: like the man made bridge, or they just can't use
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: it because the bridge blocked it, because that doesn't seem
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: like magic if you can block it with cement, yeah, yeah.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: Or maybe angels are just really polite. It is Minnesota,
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: after all, that's true, so they just see this stone
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: and they're like, well, we'll go We'll find another way
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: we can. Obviously they don't want us to go that way.
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that could be.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: He says this spiritual gait existed until eighteen sixty five, which,
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: of course everyone will recognize as the point in history
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: when God used quote a violation of the Seal of
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: Confession to guide the devil away from the American Civil
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: War to an unpopulated, open plain area of the world
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: in preparation for the Battle of souls. We all remember that.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: We're all yeah, in grade school, what we aren't taught
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: is that that open plain area of the world Sterns County, Minnesota,
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: baby show.
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: Okay, that's convenient, that's convenient. Well that's I mean, why
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: would they teach that if we didn't go to school there,
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: Like I'm sure in Sterns County, Minnesota they teach that
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: part of it. Here's my question. I still am snagged
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: on this one detail about the devil being at the
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: American Civil War. Yes, I'm really curious to know what
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: side mister Becker thinks that the Devil was fighting on
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: in that particular conflict.
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I do need to know that because also the.
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: Thing about guys like this that write things like this
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: tend to get either anti Semitic or racist or misogynist
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: or weirdly homophobic, like pretty quick. So I need to
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: read these and see what kind of underlying bigotry is
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: at work in the mythology here.
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: I guarantee there's something not great about indigenous people.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean absolutely for sure, there's a thing about
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: angels and a blessed walkway spiritual path along land that
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: did not belong to us. So right, Yeah, for sure,
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: there's something about, you know, God being involved in that.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: Now, I don't want people to worry thinking Adam Andy.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: Holy shit, is the devil still in Sterns County, Minnesota
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: being cast away from the American Civil War? Where are
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: they gonna send him to cast him away from the
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: next American Civil War? Relax? According to Dan Becker, the
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: forces of good eventually triumphed over evil.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah, when was that January sixth?
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: Is that?
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: No?
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: Actually it was after a huge angels versus demon's battle
• 12:51
  Speaker 2: during the famous Armistice Day blizzard of nineteen forty.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I forgot. They did teach us that school. Yeah,
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: I forgot about that one. The armist is this day
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: blizzard where the angels and the demons had the big fight. Yep,
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: like in West Side story.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: That's why nothing bad has happened since nineteen forty.
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: She solved it.
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: Evil was defeated at.
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: Everything since is according to God's plan. Yep, according to
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: mister Becker.
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: We did it, We got him, got him mission to
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: accomplished Dan Becker. So in all, Dan Becker made seventy
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: five handmade short books that he said were spiritually connected
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: to Old Saint Anne's past. Fifty nine of them are
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: in a museum in Sterns County, Minnesota, although I'm not
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: sure which of the probably dozens of museums in Sterns County,
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: Minnesota that might be.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: So fifty nine of the meaning sixteen do I did
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: I do my math correctly here? Sixteen are still on
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: the loose, so unaccounted for. We need to track them down.
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: I feel like this is our mission, Adam. We need
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: to find the remaining sixteen books and assemble them all.
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: They need to be preserved.
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: Well, we assemble them all, obviously, because that is going
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: to reopen the portal.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, and that's going to bring the devil right
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: to distract him from the next American Civil war.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: Right, then we get contact with the devil, We get
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: to trick him into going away so we can fight
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: our next civil war in peace.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: I wonder if we're mentioned in these holy texts as
• 14:30
  Speaker 1: in some sort of prophecy.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: Probably I was, you know, I was in the Midwest
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: at the time. Yeah, yeah, so I'd be offended if
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: I'm not mentioned.
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're regionally famous, right, sure.
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: I gotta be the most famous comedian from my hometown.
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: Just joking Richard Pryors from where I'm from?
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: Oh man, I don't know if there's any comics from
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: where I'm from. But Elijah wood is So.
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: Are you from Cedar Rapids?
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Ashton Kutcher got the I.
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: Mean to be technical about it. He's from outside of
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: Cedar Rapid. Oh, he's from Animosa or whatever it's called.
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: Don't claim him as a native son.
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: No, no, he's not one of us. He is a
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: Cubs fan though, Oh good for him. Yeah.
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: So yeah, I don't know about Old Saint Anne's past.
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: I just know I need one of these books.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: Absolutely absolutely.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: People need to read this article and see these books.
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: They are something else. Well, just this illustration.
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: I can't tell, like if it's supposed to be a
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: map or if it's depicting an event.
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and there's a stone, chalice. There's all sorts of
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: shit calvalry hell is that? Yeah?
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah? Stone? Is that a devil? Is that the devil?
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: I don't know, because it's got clause for hands, but
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: also clause for a head and clause for a tail.
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: That is one of the devil's forms. Is just clause yeah,
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: just four sets of clause.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, this is fascinating to me. I had somehow never
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: heard of this, and I really want to go to
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: Stearns County, Minnesota. Now, let's next time I'm in the Midwest,
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: let's make let's make a pilgrimage.
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's not that county where like that corrupt sheriff
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: is like in charge of this, like militarized that where
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: they just like pull people over and it's just like
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: an asset forfeiture like gang ring. Probably that's in Minnesota somewhere,
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: and it's and it's like, I always make sure I
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: want to avoid that area.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're talking about the area that set a woman
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: to prison for eight years for having bong water and yeah, yeah, yeah, yah, yeah,
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: yeah that one, because they treat that as however much
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: bong water you have, they consider that the amount of
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: drugs you had. So if there's eight ounces of bong water,
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: it's considered that you had eight ounces of meth, which
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: is a huge film. So yeah, Minnesota's fun. All right,
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: Let's talk about this next one, the Kensington Rune Stone.
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: I have heard of this one. This one I had
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: heard of. They did a radio story on it once.
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: And we know this exists. It definitely exists. It's a
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: go see. It's a big ass slab of stone that
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: was discovered in western Minnesota in eighteen ninety eight. A
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: Swedish immigrant named olif Omen said he found it in
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: a field in Douglas County. It was named after the
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: nearest settlement at the time, Kensington. This is a highly
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: controversial artifact because it claims to be a document of
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: a Viking expedition to the American Midwest in thirteen sixty two.
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: This is the inscription on it, translated to English eight geats.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: In twenty two Norwegians on an exploration journey from Vinland
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: to the west. We had camp by two scaries. One
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: day's journey north from this stone. We were out the fish.
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: One day. After we came home, we found ten men,
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: red of blood and dead. Ave virgo, Maria, save us
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: from evil. Your goddamn right. That's how we do it
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: in the Midwest. Roll up, get rolled up, Get hit right,
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: motherfucking Vikings. Anyway, that's controversial because that's a full one
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: hundred and thirty years before Big Daddy Christopher Columbus found
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: America completely empty and unoccupied and undiscovered.
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, weren't there. I mean there were like Viking
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: expeditions to you know, Norwegian expeditions to like Nova Scotia
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: and stuff, right like that, or Newfoundland like that area
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: long before Columbus.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: Yes, but it has never been proven that Vikings made
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: it here.
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: And I want this to be real just because fuck
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: Christopher Columbus.
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah well he also never right, he furthest in he
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: got was Hispaniola. He never he never made it to Minnesota.
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you what if Christopher Columbus came to Minnesota,
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: fuck him up.
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: Too, goddamn right, find him red of blood. It seems
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: like the consensus is that this is not real, But
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: also think this is absolutely the kind of thing people
• 19:03
  Speaker 2: would launch a high level conspiracy. Oh yeah, because Christopher
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: Columbus is such a huge part of American history and
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: having to rewrite that and say no, actually, Vikings found
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: this place way before Christopher Columbus. No one's going to
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: want to do that. American history isn't going to want
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: to rewrite itself that way. So I absolutely think people
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: would lie about this also, Oh.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: For sure, for sure. But it's the kind of thing
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: that like either way, there's reasons to ignore it and
• 19:34
  Speaker 1: cover it up if it's true, and there's reasons to
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: fucking like fabricate and ride the hoax through on the
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: griff circuit if it's not true.
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: There is one school of thought that thinks this is
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: a hoax. But apparently also at some point in the
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: nineteen forties, someone got enough momentum behind the idea that
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: this was real that it was displayed in the Smithsonian
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: for a while. So I don't know enough about Vikings
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: to be like, this is definitely fake. I don't know.
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know. Maybe it's real. Here's
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: the thing, I wouldn't give a shit either way.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it doesn't matter. It's the liberty balance thing. It's
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: the when the legend becomes fact print the legend right
• 20:14
  Speaker 1: that like it's just a story and it gets everything
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: is part of a national myth, you know, and this
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: is just further evidence of that, especially if it like
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: is rooted in you know, Scandinavian politics, like like that
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: weird like the weird cont like contempt that all three
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: of those Lapland nations like or four I guess have
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: for each other. It's like, I don't know, Yeah, who
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: cares it's it's fun. It's a fun story.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: I even disagree when people say that thing about aliens.
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: If aliens actually land and we all see it, it's
• 20:50
  Speaker 2: gonna just change everyone's belief system overnight. No, it's not.
• 20:54
  Speaker 2: It's gonna be the same thing you see now. There's
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: gonna be a group of people who think it's not real.
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: There's gonna be a group of people who think it
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: is the second Coming of Christ. There's gonna be a
• 21:04
  Speaker 2: group of people who are like, ah, I don't know,
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: I gotta pay my bills. Are they gonna help me
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: pay my bills? I don't give a fuck. Otherwise, I
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: don't think it's gonna be the fucking drama that people
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: think it will be. And I don't think finding out
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: vikings found the Midwest in the thirteen hundred would actually
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: impact the world that much. No, it's just Americans want
• 21:24
  Speaker 2: to be right, you know. All right, So this next one,
• 21:27
  Speaker 2: I've seen this thrown around more as a joke or
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: an urban legend. I'll link to a Reddit thread I
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: found with a bunch of Minnesotans talking about the various
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: conspiracy theories from that area. And man, there's a lot
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: of talk about sex tunnels under Uptown Minneapolis. Prince has
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: a song called Uptown, so there's something sexy happen in there.
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: There's at least a sex tunnel for Prince there somewhere.
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: And my question is, isn't any tunnel of sex tunnel
• 21:56
  Speaker 2: if people are having sex in it?
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's I mean, it doesn't even have to be
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: like a regular ongoing thing. You can masturbate in a
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: tunnel and boom, it's a sex tunnel. Now you know
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: that happens once, that's a sex tunnel from now on.
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, then we're just talking tunnels under a metropolitan area,
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: which LA has tunnels everyone. There's tunnels under a bunch
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: of cities. That's but sex like dedicated sex tunnels. How
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: do you get invited? Where's the entrance?
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: I don't know, I can't. They're not gonna tell.
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: Me, aren't they. That's kind of why I had you on.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: I was hoping you would tell me where the sex
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: tunnels are.
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: Well, yeah, you to get like sex tunnel status, though,
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: to get that level of clearance, you have to be
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: like from here, like I yeah, I think that there's
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: a way. There used to be a naturalization process. You
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: could get kind of grandfathered in if you were around
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: long enough. But I know that that's been a hotly
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: contested ballot issue.
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: Is there like a sex tunnel golden visa thing where
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: I can just pay one hundred thousand dollars because I
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: totally have that.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: We had a candidate running on that platform.
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: Was it Jesse Ventura?
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: It was? It was Jesse Ventura. It was one of
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: his many campaign promises that he never delivered.
• 23:10
  Speaker 2: Upon foreshadowing alert he's gonna come up again.
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: I mean, if there's someone who knows where the sex
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: tunnels are, it's him. Oh hell yeah, so we should
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: probably you probably should have invited him on.
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: He's still alive, right, yeah, the predators showing using that
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: fucking heat.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: Nation, that's where That's where you hid from the predator
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: was in the sex tunnels. Because predators, I don't know
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: if you know this or not, their prudes, if you
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: display any kind of sex stuff around them or horniness,
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: they get so uncomfortable and they just forget all about
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: hunting you. It's true, that is true.
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, this last one for local legends and institutions.
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: This isn't even a conspiracy. I'm all of America surveillance
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: of Black Lives Matter activists. I encourage everyone to read
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: this story. For one thing, it happens way earlier in
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: history than you would expec When you hear what happened here,
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: you're like, oh, this must have happened. What twenty twenty two,
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: twenty twenty three, Now it's like twenty thirteen.
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: There is a depressing related thing that's more recent that's
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: kind of in the same ballpark as this, But whatever,
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: I'll bring it up later.
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, I might have a guess at what you're
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: talking about, but first, let's talk about this. For one thing,
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: I found lots of talk about tunnels under the Mall
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: of America, and it's like, yeah, that place is a castle.
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: It would be nuts to not have tunnels under there
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: to make it easier for people to get around. Also,
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: there was a rumor slash urban legend that there was
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: a secret water park in the bottom of the Mall
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: of America, as if someone would open the biggest mall
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: in America and keep the water park a secrets, Like,
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: that's not how malls work at It sounds.
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: To me like somebody confused the water park at the
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: Great Wolf Lodge, which is the big hotel with a
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: water park in it near the Mall of America that
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: people stay at when they come to the Mall of
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: America oftentimes.
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: Or the aquarium. There's an aquarium under the Mall of America.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: I didn't know that.
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: You've never been to the aquarium.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: No, it's great.
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: It's got a shark tunnel and everything.
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: What the fuck? Really?
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: I go to the aquarium in the Mall of America
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: every time I go to the Mall of a Madam.
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: You and I have been to the Mall of America
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: together and I did not know about this aquarium.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we were going for a Halloween thing. I bet
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: there's a haunted aquarium during Halloween.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: God damn, give me a hunted aquarium. Please.
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: You've met You did not know there's an aquarium.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: No, I've been to the Mirror Maze. There's a mirror
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: maze at the Mall of America. That's that I like.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: But I didn't know about an aquarium.
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: Aquarium rules I go all the time.
• 25:38
  Speaker 1: Well, shit, fuck, damn gosh, let's talk about Mall of
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: America security.
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: It was found out in twenty fifteen by the intercept
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: that Mall of America in the early twenty tens, started
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: monitoring Black Lives Matter active and just anyone protesting police
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: violence or protesting anything in or around the Minneapolis area.
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: And they did it by creating fake Facebook profiles and
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: basically catfishing these people and using that to build dossiers
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: about local activists. This is Mall of America Security.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: Mall of America Security doing cointel pro.
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: Yes, and it's not rumor, it's not alleged. The Intercept
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: requested court records from the trial of eleven activists who
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: were arrested after a protest at the Mall of America,
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: and all of this shit is in those court records,
• 26:41
  Speaker 2: says exactly what they did. Also, the Mall of America,
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: at some point during George Bush's War on Terror, started
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: an outfit called Risk Assessment and Mitigation that was a
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: private counter terrorism unit. And one of their most notable
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: achievements was the questioning of a Pakistani American man named
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: Najam Kureishi by the FBI. Why was he questioned by
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: the FBI because his father accidentally left his cell phone
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: on a table at the food court at the Mall
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: of America as only a terrorist would ram as this
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: department was called Risk Assessment and Mitigation, reported this obvious
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: risk to local authorities, who reported it to the fucking FBI,
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: who then traveled to this guy's home to ask if
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: he was a terrorist because his dad forgot his cell
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: phone at the mall. What the fuck?
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that kind of just shows you it's always been
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: this way. Yeah, right, because that was two thousand and one.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: No, this was well, yeah that was earlier. So that
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: was like sometime twenty tens when that happened.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was in the early two thousands,
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: because it was twenty eleven when it was revealed that
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: that happened, which is just like yeah, h and then
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: I mean target did something similar to this, uh in
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: twenty twenty.
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: Well I remember hearing that because there was one target
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: in particular that got burned down and people were like, oh,
• 28:10
  Speaker 2: what did target ever do? And I remember reading that
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: that target was where they basically tried out new experiments
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: in catching shoplifters.
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah there it.
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: Was like their test market for catching criminals.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it was a crazy surveillance shit.
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And their reasoning was, well, we'll put this in
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: a high crime neighborhood and we'll just use it to
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: test out arresting people. So it's like, yeah, that target
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: got burned to the ground. Go figure. Hey, since we're
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: talking politics, now, remember that time a bunch of fringe
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: leftist lunatics with Trump derangement syndrome killed two Minnesota lawmakers
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: and their spouses in their homes. I might be messing
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: up some of the details there.
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: No, that sounds like exactly what happened. You know, somebody
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: who wanted medicare for all rights for trans and queer people, Like, yeah,
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: sounds like something they would do. Yeah.
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, probably had money on a trans athlete winning some
• 29:07
  Speaker 2: competition that they were banned from and you know, gotten
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: their feelings about it. It happens, whatever the case. Almost
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: as soon as these shootings happened, conspiracies started going around
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: about how the murders were actually tied to Minnesota Governor
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: Tim Walls. And this was all based on the fact
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: that in twenty nineteen, he reappointed the suspected shooter, fifty
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: seven year old Vance Luthor Bolter, to a state board
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: that dealt with Minnesota's workforce. In some way granted the
• 29:39
  Speaker 2: governor of every state appoints like a thousand people to
• 29:43
  Speaker 2: these meaningless boards every year, probably never meets or speaks
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: to most of them.
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, no, they just get a list of names. Yeah.
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: But because of this one minor connection, right wingers like
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: Mike Cernovich and whoever the fuck else were like Tim
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: Walls order to hit.
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: It's like, what, which is it? I love? I love
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: the rights? Like, look, fuck Tim Waltz for a lot
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: of reasons. That guy fucking sucks for a lot of reasons.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: Having said that, he's like the bare minimum that I
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: think we should be requiring for like any kind of
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: decent state government leadership, everything to his right should be
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: just considered off limits. But like this idea, they're trying
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: to paint him as some kind of like, you know, yeah,
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: he's a nice grandpa in the face of it, but
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: he's a criminal underworld ye kingpin, you know. And it's
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: just like, there's no way to make that fly.
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: No, it makes no sense.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, fucking where the fuck is he right now? As
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: Minnesotans are being fucking indicted for the you know, yeah,
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: on terrorism charges, Like what the fuck?
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah that happened. Also, yeah, this guy can't do
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: shit speaking of conspiracies, and uh, let's talk about a
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: different batch of Minnesota law makers. Four Republicans in the
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: Minnesota Legislature, up to and including Senate Assistant Minority Leader
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: Justin Icorn introduced legislation finally to protect the people of
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: Minnesota from the detrimental impact of chemtrails. If you're unfamiliar,
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: that's the theory that claims that airplane exhaust fumes are
• 31:19
  Speaker 2: laced with chemicals that are used in everything from mind
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: control to forced sterilization.
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, my question always about a theory like this. It
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: was the same question I had about the idea that
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: five G Internet was some sort of weapon that was
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: going to be launched on people. Is how do the
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: people launching it keep from getting hit by it themselves.
• 31:43
  Speaker 2: It's not like you can go up and fuck with
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: the clouds in a detrimental way and then come back
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: down to Earth and some of us are fine, okay.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: But you're ignoring the fact that these people that are
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: doing this have successfully interbreeded with the reptilians, and so
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: the reptilian components in their DNA give them immunity from
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: the negative effects of the five G So they're not
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: worried about it because they are immune to it.
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: I feel stupid for not thinking about that.
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, look, it's this is basic shit. Dude.
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: You if you're gonna podcast about it, at least you know,
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: google it.
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, run it through chat GPT, see what they tell
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: you about reptility.
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: I mean that is funny though to me is that, Like,
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: so I feel like there is like this weird crossover
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: in like conspiracy theorists who do buy into the chemtrail
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: shit and stuff like that, who like they're it's it's
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: like this weird knee jerk fear to anything technological or
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: science based. You know. It's the people that are like, ah,
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: they put chemicals and all the bread. Like, it's the
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: same people that were like just they'll just use AI,
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: They'll just use chat GPT, Like it's not like it's
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: not completely destroying their brain, right right, It's it's so
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: hilarious in anyway.
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: So, this proposed legislation rows around a bunch of not
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: science terms like zenobiotic electromagnetism in fields dan Akroyd Right,
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: it requires county sheriffs to investigate citizen complaints of quote,
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: galuting atmospheric activity end quote bill doesn't outright discuss KEM trails,
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: but all that hallmarks are there. Here's a quote from
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: Holly Buck at the University at Buffalo in New York.
• 33:25
  Speaker 2: Because the text of this bill focuses so much on
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: electromagnetic radiation, you can tell that it is coming from
• 33:31
  Speaker 2: the community of people concerned with KEEM trails. End quote.
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it would be like you use a bunch of words,
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: you know that are only used in like automotive engineering,
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: but you never use the word car.
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: Apparently, lawmakers in at least seven other states have introduced
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: similar legislation, most of them stalled at some point in
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: the process, except Tennessee, where that shits sailed through and
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: is a law on the books. Now you cannot do
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: any snow piercer shit to the clouds. Next thing, you know,
• 34:04
  Speaker 2: we're all living on a train and there's only five
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: hundred of us. Oh gosh, was there only one train?
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: See, these are the questions, these are the questions.
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: We don't have time to litigate snow piercer right now.
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: It seems like the Minnesota bill is still up in
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: the air, even though this article is from twenty twenty four.
• 34:20
  Speaker 2: What's cute to me about this is I guarantee if
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: this guy truly believes for sterilization is happening at a
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: government level, I promise he also somehow believes it's happening
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: to like white Republicans, because there's no universe in which
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: this motherfucker would introduce legislation that he hopes is going
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: to protect and improve the lives of people of color.
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: Well yeah, because again he's gonna ignore the people like
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: Elon Musk or absolutely poisoning with industrial waste and hazardous
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: conditions like black communities and other communities of colors and
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: immigrant neighborhoods, like they'd never lift a finger for that,
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: or three M in Minnesota. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, but
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: this so.
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I guarantee he thinks, like if you were to
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: ask who's behind this, he's gonna say the Democrats. Biden.
• 35:12
  Speaker 2: It's like, I feel like Republicans are where America was
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: after the Berlin Wall fell and we were just looking
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: around like who do we fight now? Like who's our enemy?
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: That feels like Republicans right now, and they're just like, well, fuck,
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: Biden's gone. Who do we blame everything on? It's like
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: Obama again, do we blame Obama or shit that's happening.
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's weird. They want to have the like Trump
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: is the savior, delivering us from evil and making everything work.
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: But also why do things still suck? Maybe there's another
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: like they can't you know.
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: You guys won, Yeah, you want in? It still sucks?
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: Go figure. So this last one, I won't go into
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: a lot of detail about this because I did a
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: whole series of episodes about it. That is the death
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: of Paul Wellstone. That said, when I released that episode publicly,
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: I just kind of edited together bits from the four
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: episodes and put that out publicly and released it as
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: one longer episode. So I'm actually going to put all
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: four episodes out this week for free so people they've
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: been behind a paywall, so people can listen to the
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: complete series to celebrate this coming up again. But I
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: absolutely believe Paul Wellstone was murdered. I understand he died
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: in a plane crash. Yeah, don't tell me. You can't
• 36:24
  Speaker 2: rig a fucking plane to crash.
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it was when it was a small plane too.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: It's a very small plane. People should listen to the episodes.
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: There is a lot of weirdness. If you don't want
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: to listen to them. There's a book out there called
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: American Assassination The Strange death of Senator Paul Wellstone by
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: an Indigenous fellow named Four Arrows and a guy named
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: Jim Fetzer. It is out of print, but you can
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: find it for cheap on eBay. The Internet Archive has
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: a PDF copy that you can read if you just
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: log in and create an account. He makes a compelling
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: case for Wellstone being murdered, and it makes sense given
• 37:01
  Speaker 2: one the balance of the Senate at the time and
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: everything the United States wanted to do in the Middle East.
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: Paul Wellstone was the one guy who was opposed to that.
• 37:13
  Speaker 2: If you look back on that point in history, you
• 37:15
  Speaker 2: were getting called a hippie if you didn't think we
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: should go to the Middle East and tear some shit
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: up over nine to eleven. And Paul Wellstone was the
• 37:23
  Speaker 2: one guy who was like, no, no, this is dumb.
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: He was charismatic as fuck, he was about to win
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: another election. He posed the most serious threat to what
• 37:33
  Speaker 2: America wanted to do.
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: He's still basically synonymous in this state with like the
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: ideals of politics. Like he's still like omar I believe
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: just recently in an interview, like they asked her to
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: list like her favorite Minnesota things, like it was her
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: Mount Rushmore of Minnesota things, and it was like artist, politician,
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: and then like a couple other and Wellstone was her
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: politician and he's still Like there's a monument to him
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: in the cemetery that we that's nearby, Like yeah, he's
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: he's he's still like kind of you know, a folk
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: here hero here.
• 38:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah. He absolutely would have been a threat to what
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: they wanted to do.
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: She would have been on track for a presidency, I
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: think honestly, like, yeah.
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: Because he was the only one opposing that shit.
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: Mm hmm. He was popular enough that I feel like
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: he would have been able to whip the Democratic Party
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: into actually making them pay for it.
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: He was young, he's still young, Like he wasn't an
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: old dude. Ye had a lot going for him. I
• 38:32
  Speaker 2: actually think there was a plane crash a couple of
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: years before this where famously a guy running for Senate
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: I believe in Missouri died in a plane crash and
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: the guy he was running against still lost the election.
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: That's how unpopular, Yeah, that guy was, and the reason
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: he lost is the guy's wife ran in his place, right,
• 38:53
  Speaker 2: that's right, and this time they fucking took care of that.
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: Wellstone and his wife died on this plane, so there
• 39:01
  Speaker 2: was no chance that the wife was going to step
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: in and pull a Missouri this time. So look into it.
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: Read the book, listen to the episodes. I think Paul
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: Wellstone was murdered.
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah. People have bumper stickers all over that have like
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: Paul Wellstone quotes like I can't remember. He has one
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: really famous one that often gets kind of quoted as
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: like just like an anonymous proverb amost But it's something
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: that he said. I wish I could remember what it
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: was right now, but I see it on bumper stickers
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: and stuff over here in Minnesota all the time.
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: Yep, Paul Wellstone was a good egg. All right. Now
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: let's talk about some more lighthearted shit. Let's talk about
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: some sports conspiracies. These are almost all baseless, but since
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: we were just talking about a famous Minnesota politician, I
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: said he would come back up sports related conspiracies. How
• 39:51
  Speaker 2: about Jesse Ventura was the fucking governor for a while.
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: That guy's an athlete and hosted a show called Conspiracy
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: Theory with Jesse Ventura. Here's the thing. I have no
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: fucking problem with Jesse Venture. I feel like his heart
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: is usually in the right place. I don't think he's
• 40:09
  Speaker 2: a Trump supporter. I know he's he's a goofball. I
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: know he seems like not a serious person. But I
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: fuck with Jesse Venture. I'm not. I'm not mad at
• 40:19
  Speaker 2: this dude at all. One of my favorite television moments
• 40:23
  Speaker 2: of all time. Jesse Ventura on his conspiracy show is
• 40:26
  Speaker 2: at the opening to some government facility that's literally inside
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: a kate Like He's at the doorway of it where
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: you drive in, and there's a guy there with a
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: gun and one Jesse Venture is very indignant that he
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: can't get in because I'm a former governor. It's like,
• 40:42
  Speaker 2: no one fucking cares, and that doesn't get you in
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: everywhere you want to go. And then he's literally is like,
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: well what would you do if I just drove past you?
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: And the guy's like, I would shoot you? Duh, Like
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: what the fuck? I have a fucking rifle in my hand,
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: what do you think it's here for? But that was
• 41:02
  Speaker 2: Jesse Ventura. He would just roll up and be like,
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: our mental American, tell me what I want to know.
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: I'm asha. Yeah, I love that. You do a really
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: good Ventura. By the way, I don't know how you finish.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: That's a pretty spot on. That's an Adomian level, uh
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: Jesse the body of Ventura.
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: I believe we covered every episode of the Conspiracy Show.
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: So he's just in your head shot forever.
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: And I watched it religiously when it was actually on
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: the air. He covered some interesting shit.
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you gotta get you gotta respect, you know, I
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: mean likes asmired as it might be in a in
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: a sense of entitlement that comes from having a certain
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: level of privilege your entire life, there is a punk
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: rock spirit that you have to admire in that, like, well,
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: when it comes down to it, I'm just a person
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: and you're just a person. The only thing between us
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: is that gun. So if I do something and that's
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: not a threat to you personally and you shoot me,
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: I guess that's on you, even if it is the law,
• 42:05
  Speaker 1: Like there's a there is a there is a like
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: let's strip shit down to its essence here that I
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: kind of you gotta respect about that, at least that impulse.
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: He's also got a great moment on his show where
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: he talks about how it turns out when you get
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: elected governor, you get a briefing from the CIA, like
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: they sit you down and are like, here's what the
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: fuck's up. And he was like, those people look like
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: the dude in line behind you at the coffee shop.
• 42:34
  Speaker 2: They look like your neighbor. He's like your picture in
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: the CIA and thinking, oh, I'm going to see the
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: CIA when they're coming. He's like, no, you won't, No,
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: you fucking won't. That's why there was this incident that
• 42:45
  Speaker 2: happened back in Iran like ten years ago. I used
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: to do a bit about it on stage because my
• 42:52
  Speaker 2: argument was like, why should we have to save these people.
• 42:54
  Speaker 2: What happened is these three American hikers got taken into
• 42:58
  Speaker 2: custody on suspicion of being spies.
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: I remember this. I think I was on this episode
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: with you, and it was.
• 43:04
  Speaker 2: When they were hiking in Iran. And my question then
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: and now was well, who the fuck's hiking in Iran
• 43:12
  Speaker 2: at that point in history? If not a fucking spy,
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: I don't think you could just like go to price
• 43:18
  Speaker 2: line and be like book me a ticket to Iran, please.
• 43:22
  Speaker 2: It's like, no, the CIA is going to check up
• 43:24
  Speaker 2: on you doing some especially as a white person. So
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: it's like, if they weren't spies, what were they they're doing?
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: And if they were spies, why is it our fault
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: they fucked up at work? Like why do we got
• 43:34
  Speaker 2: to spend all this taxpayer money to go bail them out?
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, aren't they supposed to be like disavowed or whatever?
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: Isn't that the deal? Isn't that the rule? You get caught,
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: you're disavowed. Sorry.
• 43:44
  Speaker 2: And the thing is, if you look at them, they
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: don't look like spies, but also they look like spies.
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: Because spies aren't supposed to look like spies. My dad
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: apparently had lunch with a CIA agent or what someone
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: who he suspects was this CIA agent in like the
• 44:01
  Speaker 1: I want to say the seventies. I think he was
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: in like Sierra Leone. He was an export representative for
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: a major American appliance company, and he was always going
• 44:10
  Speaker 1: to like, uh, yeah, he went to Africa, Central America,
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: like it's in a lot of places as an expert
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: rep and like he said that he had lunch with
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: this guy that he's convinced was CIA.
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: It wouldn't surprise me. My dad had a friend when
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: I was a kid who even then my fan like,
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: my dad was best friends with this dude for like
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: thirty years and had no idea what he did for
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: a living, just no fucking clue. The dude was smart
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: as buck, like one of the smartest fucking people I've
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: ever known. No one had any clue what he did
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: for a living. He would just like disappear and show up.
• 44:49
  Speaker 2: He seemed weirdly interested in my sister, who was a
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: child at the time, all hallmarks of being the CIA.
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: You know. Yeah, it was weird. It was weird. I
• 44:58
  Speaker 2: don't even want to say his fucking name.
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: Well, yeah, because then they'll come after you. Yeah.
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: Also, I forgot it. You weren't that important, motherfucker. All right,
• 45:06
  Speaker 2: enough about Jesse Ventura. Bro let's talk about Gary Anderson.
• 45:14
  Speaker 2: Everyone in Minnesota just turned this off right now at
• 45:18
  Speaker 2: the mention of Gary Anderson. This is what I can't
• 45:21
  Speaker 2: find any sources for, just people suggesting it, and it's stupid.
• 45:25
  Speaker 2: But Gary Anderson. He was the Vikings field goal kicker
• 45:28
  Speaker 2: in nineteen ninety eight. Through the entire regular season and playoffs,
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: he did not miss a single field goal and then
• 45:37
  Speaker 2: in the NFC Championship game against the Atlanta Falcons, it
• 45:42
  Speaker 2: comes down to the Vikings needing a Gary Anderson field
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: goal to win the game, and that motherfucker missed for
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: the first time all season. That is a hallmark of
• 45:54
  Speaker 2: Minnesota sports. There are some absolutely heartbreaking moments in Minnesota sports.
• 46:02
  Speaker 2: I remember a dropped touchdown in the end zone in
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: a playoff game. I don't remember exactly who dropped it,
• 46:09
  Speaker 2: but I know people, I know Minnesota Vikings fans know
• 46:12
  Speaker 2: what I'm talking about.
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, there's also been a number of missed field
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: goals that have been like season ending things that are
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: kind of I feel like every time it happens that
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: Gary Anderson think comes up again. Yeah, and I feel
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: I mean, I might be whatever, but I feel like
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: it's happened more than once since then. I feel like
• 46:31
  Speaker 1: it's happened maybe two or three times since then.
• 46:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a couple really famous kicks in NFL history
• 46:38
  Speaker 2: that are always gonna come up. The Buffalo Bill's wide, right.
• 46:43
  Speaker 2: I think that was Scott Norwood who missed that, which
• 46:47
  Speaker 2: there's a fascinating conspiracy theory about that. That was the
• 46:51
  Speaker 2: Super Bowl right after the First War in Iraq, where
• 46:53
  Speaker 2: everyone was raw, raw, super patriotic, but also security off
• 46:59
  Speaker 2: the fucking charts. There was a helicopter hovering above the
• 47:03
  Speaker 2: end zone when he kicked that field goal, and there
• 47:06
  Speaker 2: are people who are like, that helicopter's what knocked it
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: off the right. Oh my god, that would be so funny.
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: That Cia just sent a helicopter.
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: Cia had money on it.
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: You don't understand. We have a deal with the Aliens.
• 47:21
  Speaker 1: If the Buffalo Bills win a Super Bowl were fucked
• 47:25
  Speaker 1: it feels that way. Yeah, Jesse can tell us all
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: about it.
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: Gary Anderson missing this kick on purpose is an insane idea. Yeah,
• 47:34
  Speaker 2: I mean, that's not how people who play sports work.
• 47:37
  Speaker 2: That's not how Gary Anderson wanted to be remembered. And
• 47:40
  Speaker 2: the argument is they didn't give him a new contract,
• 47:43
  Speaker 2: so he was mad at the team. It's like, no
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: athlete would do that.
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: This is how you know it's a weak conspiracy theory
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: because there's nobody at the top calling the shots. It's
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: just a decision they're saying he made. And it's like,
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: well that's insane, that's silly.
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he given a choice, would have absolutely that kick.
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: He is a professional athlete who is playing in the NFL,
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: where the ultimate goal, the thing your career will be
• 48:08
  Speaker 2: judged on, is did you win a Super Bowl or not?
• 48:11
  Speaker 2: No one would miss that.
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: And like, I don't care what he's mad about. If
• 48:16
  Speaker 1: it's a missed a contract he didn't get Okay, he
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: goes to another team then and gets paid more, Like,
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: I don't, It makes no sense, Like unless the contract
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: was specifically something, we're like, well you're done and you
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: can't go anywhere else, and we own you, like something
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: like we're gonna shoot your dog in front of you,
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: like something like truly vindictive. Yeah, that makes no sense
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: for him to miss. Yeah, it's the biggest moment. It's
• 48:39
  Speaker 1: going to be the defining moment of your sports career,
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: and you, as an athlete understand that that is a
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: finite thing and that you need to have as many
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: big moments as you possibly can, because if you need
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: a defining moment, you don't want it to be something
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: that's bad, especially if you're in a sport with the
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: that's as risky as football, Like it just makes no
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: fucking sense.
• 48:58
  Speaker 2: Gary Anderson is the definition of someone who is remembered
• 49:03
  Speaker 2: for his worst moment, he was a legend, Like he
• 49:08
  Speaker 2: was arguably one of the best, if not the best,
• 49:11
  Speaker 2: field goal kicker of all fucking time. And this is
• 49:15
  Speaker 2: what people remember when his name comes up. So the
• 49:17
  Speaker 2: idea that he would have done this on purpose is
• 49:20
  Speaker 2: fucking nuts.
• 49:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, unless the theory was something like, yes,
• 49:25
  Speaker 1: he was told to do it, you know, like, at
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: least give us a nefarious person pulling the strings.
• 49:32
  Speaker 2: I think of it almost the same as this fucking
• 49:35
  Speaker 2: hysteria about transathletes. It's like Christ, there is no male
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: athlete on earth who lacks the competitive spirit to be like,
• 49:46
  Speaker 2: all right, well I can't beat these dudes, so what
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna do is transition to a woman and go
• 49:51
  Speaker 2: beat a bunch of women. That is not how people
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: who play sports fucking work.
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just simply not a thing. It's just simply
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: not a thing.
• 50:00
  Speaker 2: No, it is never going to be a thing. You
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: would either quit that sport, play a different sport, or
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: practice harder and get better at that sport. That is
• 50:07
  Speaker 2: how competitors work. You might cheat, but you're not going
• 50:10
  Speaker 2: to cheat like that. That wouldn't fucking happen. It doesn't happen.
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: No, no. I mean, like, no matter which side you
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: fall on, whether you're you know, pro sports, and your
• 50:21
  Speaker 1: idea of it is like people get too caught up,
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: and they get caught up in the competitive edge and
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: it's an honor thing, et cetera, et cetera. Or if
• 50:28
  Speaker 1: you're in the negative camp about it, where it's like,
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: well it's toxically masculine, it's like even then, like, well,
• 50:32
  Speaker 1: that toxic masculinity and that insecurity, that whatever is going
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: to keep those people from Yeah, it's it's just like
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: it makes no sense. They're making up people that don't
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: exist to be angry at. It's one hundred percent just
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: manufactured hostility.
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: We talked a bunch recently on an episode of the
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: Monday Show about how professional darts just banned Hams athletes,
• 50:55
  Speaker 2: and it's like, you motherfuckers have mixed competitions, You have
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: competitions where men beat against women. How the fuck are
• 51:01
  Speaker 2: you gonna ban trans women? That makes no goddamn sense.
• 51:06
  Speaker 2: The idea that you need superior upper body strength to
• 51:09
  Speaker 2: be good at darts, fuck you. My dad ruled it
• 51:12
  Speaker 2: darts and he was a meager little man, Like there's
• 51:16
  Speaker 2: no way, there's no way, anyway.
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and any regardless, like there's you know, anytime it
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: starts coming down to like, oh well, let's have this
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: biological argument, it's just like already you've lost.
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: Anyway, what we're saying is Gary Anderson didn't miss that
• 51:29
  Speaker 2: kick on purpose.
• 51:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Gary Anderson innocent.
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: This next one, though, I can get behind this one. Also,
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: no proof, no reporting on it, just suggestions from Minnesotan's online.
• 51:43
  Speaker 2: But the theory is that the Vikings wanted the roof
• 51:47
  Speaker 2: of the Metrodome to collapse because they weren't making any
• 51:51
  Speaker 2: headway trying to get a new stadium out of the city.
• 51:55
  Speaker 2: I read something about them like cutting heat to the
• 51:58
  Speaker 2: Metrodome when this storm happened, because there was famously like
• 52:02
  Speaker 2: fifteen inches of snow on the roof.
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 52:04
  Speaker 2: But at the same time, it's like, has that never
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: happened before in Minnesota?
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: You would? Yeah, I feel like it would have had.
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: I mean, like there was the big the big blizzard
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: nobody shuts up about was nineteen ninety two, I think
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: ninety one maybe.
• 52:19
  Speaker 2: So there are all of these suggestions that the Vikings
• 52:23
  Speaker 2: did something to hopefully facilitate this roof lapse, and I
• 52:28
  Speaker 2: don't know, it wouldn't surprise me like that, big, big
• 52:31
  Speaker 2: rich companies and corporations get up to way worse shit
• 52:35
  Speaker 2: than intentionally destroying a roof so they can extort the
• 52:39
  Speaker 2: city into giving them a new stadium. Yeah, that's small
• 52:42
  Speaker 2: potatoes for Yeah.
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: No, destroying destroying property they already own is kind of
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: like that's on the large scale of corporate crimes. It's
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: not a very big one.
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah. One of the other conspiracy theories that I didn't
• 52:56
  Speaker 2: put in the notes, mostly because I felt like most
• 52:59
  Speaker 2: of the country wouldn't what a super America is. Apparently,
• 53:03
  Speaker 2: in twenty twenty in Minneapolis, there were a bunch of
• 53:05
  Speaker 2: Super Americas in one particular part of the city that
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: burned down. And there are suggestions that the owners of
• 53:12
  Speaker 2: those Super Americas burned them down for either insurance money
• 53:16
  Speaker 2: or because they didn't want to pay to renovate them. They
• 53:18
  Speaker 2: were just like, here's our fucking chance. I wouldn't be
• 53:21
  Speaker 2: even sort of shocked if that.
• 53:23
  Speaker 1: Was not at all, not at all. There were cops
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: burn and shit down, Yeah, I mean literally there were
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: cops out committing crimes like it's been proven and yeah,
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: and I believe that there aren't any essays anymore. There
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: might be a few, but like we had one in
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: our neighborhood that's a speedway now and oh there's there's
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: been or no, I mean quick trick and then it
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: became an essay and now something else. No, I think
• 53:48
  Speaker 1: it's whatever.
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: Quick trip is hard to compete with. That's yeah, that's
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: one of the world's perfect stores.
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: You know. And come and go is another one that
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: people like. A being from Iowa, I always hear the
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: joke about come and go. Right, here's the thing. Minnesota
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: has one called pumping munch, and I feel like I'm
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: sorry we've been talking about come and go this whole time.
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: When pumping munch is right north of the fucking border,
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: that's way more scandalous.
• 54:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that is way more intense if you're really crunching
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: the numbers.
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: Then a come and go, if you're really pumping the munches.
• 54:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, come and go is standard practice. But a pump
• 54:27
  Speaker 2: and munch that's porn shit. Yeah, after the pump, we
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: got a word for that. Look it up.
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: Urban areations for there's acronyms for that.
• 54:38
  Speaker 2: Damn right. So let's finish, get it. Let's finish talking
• 54:46
  Speaker 2: about another.
• 54:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, let's come and go.
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: Let's talk about a couple creepy unsolved murders in Jesus, Minnesota.
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: Bad to close out. This is another one that could
• 54:56
  Speaker 2: be a whole entire episode. I'll link to a couple
• 54:59
  Speaker 2: articles about it so we don't spend another hour on
• 55:02
  Speaker 2: this episode. The disappearance of Josh Guimond or guamand g
• 55:08
  Speaker 2: Uima bo Gimi. I don't know.
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: I don't know how you'd say that.
• 55:12
  Speaker 2: In two thousand and two. Circumstances of this are weird
• 55:16
  Speaker 2: as fuck. He was writing a paper in his dorm
• 55:18
  Speaker 2: room on the night of November ninth, two thousand and two.
• 55:20
  Speaker 2: At eleven oh six pm. He left and walked approximately
• 55:24
  Speaker 2: three minutes to a party at a different nearby dorm
• 55:27
  Speaker 2: called Metton Court. Friend was with him, said he was
• 55:31
  Speaker 2: in a perfectly normal mood. Got to the apartment, played
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: poker for a while. Weird detail number one. By all accounts,
• 55:37
  Speaker 2: he drank anywhere from seven to twelve beers and then
• 55:41
  Speaker 2: left around eleven forty five pm.
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: What time did he get there?
• 55:44
  Speaker 2: He drank seven to twelve beers in thirty nine minutes.
• 55:49
  Speaker 2: I have had some drinking issues in my life at
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: the height of my powers, I would not be able
• 55:55
  Speaker 2: to put away seven to twelve beers in thirty nine
• 55:58
  Speaker 2: minutes and not throw up immediately.
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, like I could maybe. You know, my
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: brother had this thing. He could chug a beer in
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: less than a minute. It was like ten seconds or something.
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: He would do that. But like, you can't do seven
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: of those in a row. No, Like, the only way
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: to drink this many beers this fast is that you
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: are slamming them. You are, and you're making a show
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: of it, which means you're getting very fucked up probably,
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: And yeah, you would puke, like just the carbonation of it, right,
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: Like to drink that many that fast, I don't buy it. Yeah,
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 56:29
  Speaker 2: Maybe his friends killed him if he.
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: Was doing a power hour thing like, but again that's
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: like his friends.
• 56:35
  Speaker 2: But then why do you leave? Because at eleven forty
• 56:38
  Speaker 2: five he gets up to leave, they said he didn't
• 56:41
  Speaker 2: seem intoxicated, which.
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: Sure is everybody else there drunk?
• 56:45
  Speaker 2: Is that it?
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: And they think, well, I wasn't that bad, so he
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: couldn't have been that bad.
• 56:49
  Speaker 2: And like, after thirty nine minutes, you're not gonna be
• 56:52
  Speaker 2: as drunk as you're gonna be eventually having drank seven
• 56:55
  Speaker 2: to twelve beers, but it's gonna be noticeable. Yeah, if
• 56:59
  Speaker 2: you're on beer nonumber twelve after thirty nine minutes, you're like,
• 57:03
  Speaker 2: it's people will recognize. So that part is all weird
• 57:06
  Speaker 2: to me. But they say he didn't seem intoxicated. He
• 57:09
  Speaker 2: had been implying that he had somewhere else to be
• 57:12
  Speaker 2: that night, so when he got up at eleven forty five,
• 57:15
  Speaker 2: they assumed he was going down to the bathroom. He
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: doesn't come back, so then they assume, well, he just
• 57:21
  Speaker 2: was drunk and decided to walk home and go to sleep.
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: That's the last time his friends see him. But a
• 57:26
  Speaker 2: witness sees him on a bridge between the two dorms
• 57:29
  Speaker 2: a short time after eleven forty five. And it seems
• 57:32
  Speaker 2: like that's the problem, because I say all the time,
• 57:36
  Speaker 2: the foundation upon which the entire true crime genre is
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: built is lazy police work. That's where all your unsolved
• 57:43
  Speaker 2: crimes come from. That's where all your people who get
• 57:46
  Speaker 2: exonerated after twenty five years come from. It's lazy fucking
• 57:51
  Speaker 2: police work. These cops heard, well, this kid was seen
• 57:54
  Speaker 2: on a bridge, he was drunk. He fell in the
• 57:56
  Speaker 2: lake and drown and that's all they ever focused on. Meanwhile,
• 58:00
  Speaker 2: there is all sorts of weirdness that points to that
• 58:03
  Speaker 2: maybe not be in the case. For one thing, there
• 58:06
  Speaker 2: was music playing on the computer in his dorm room
• 58:08
  Speaker 2: between eleven fifty two PM and twelve thirty two a
• 58:13
  Speaker 2: and evidence showed some of the songs playing were skipped,
• 58:17
  Speaker 2: implying that someone was physically operating the computer. That walk
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: back to his dorm was three minutes, so if he
• 58:25
  Speaker 2: fell when police say he fell, he wouldn't have made
• 58:27
  Speaker 2: it back to the dorm. No, and there's no real
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: evidence of him making it back to the dorm. But
• 58:33
  Speaker 2: someone was there obviously if they're fucking with his computer.
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah like that.
• 58:37
  Speaker 2: Also, the police never locked down his dorm room as
• 58:41
  Speaker 2: a crime scene, meaning anyone had access to his computer,
• 58:44
  Speaker 2: And sure enough, a few days after his disappearance, someone
• 58:49
  Speaker 2: accessed his computer and wiped a bunch of information from
• 58:52
  Speaker 2: the hard drive using a file shredding program. And nevertheless,
• 58:56
  Speaker 2: the police's conclusion was, Yeah, he drowned in a lake
• 59:00
  Speaker 2: on accident because he was drunk, And it seems like
• 59:03
  Speaker 2: the prevailing theory is that he met up with someone
• 59:06
  Speaker 2: he met online and was maybe killed by that person.
• 59:10
  Speaker 2: After Unsolved Mysteries covered this in twenty twenty two, police
• 59:14
  Speaker 2: released twenty eight images of men found on his computer,
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: hoping to generate more leads, but the case is still unsolved.
• 59:23
  Speaker 2: There are also suggestions that his disappearance was related to
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: a sex abuse scandal involving monks on the campus of
• 59:30
  Speaker 2: the university he attended. And when I first saw that,
• 59:34
  Speaker 2: it said that it was also suspected that he was
• 59:37
  Speaker 2: killed by a closeted monk. And my first thought was,
• 59:41
  Speaker 2: why would you pretend to be a monk? Why would
• 59:44
  Speaker 2: you like not let people know you're a monk? And
• 59:47
  Speaker 2: then I was like, oh, they mean he was a
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: monk who was closeted gay I get yeah. I was like,
• 59:52
  Speaker 2: what the fuck is the monk like a secret monk?
• 59:57
  Speaker 1: No, he means that Tony Shaloub, who can't be honest
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: with himself.
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 2: So again, this one could be its own episode. I'll
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 2: link to a couple articles about it, but this is
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 2: a fascinating story that is still unsolved. Had you ever
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: heard anything about this?
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 1: No? No, The next thing I have a little bit
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: of an insight on, but no, I'd never heard of this.
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the last thing. Smiley face killer theory. This is
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 2: legitimately one of my favorite theories of all time. I
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 2: know we've done a pretty scary episode about it. I
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 2: don't know if we've covered it on this pod. I
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 2: think we might have. But basically, there's a pair of
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 2: detectives who are convinced that dozens of drowning deaths of
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 2: college aged men, primarily in the Midwest, are actually the
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 2: work of either a serial killer or a group of
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 2: serial killers working together. And the thing that is driving
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 2: this belief is that at every death scene they investigate,
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 2: they found a smiley face painted somewhere in the vicinity
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: of the bot. As of two thousand and eight, faces
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 2: had been found near death's in Ohio, Pennsylvania, Indiana, Wisconsin,
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 2: and Iowa. They also found the word Sinsiniwa spray painted
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 2: at death sites in Michigan and Iowa. But seems like
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 2: that's a word that just shows up as graffiti throughout
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 2: the Midwest. It's an Indigenous word that I think means
• 1:01:22
  Speaker 2: rattlesnake or something like that. It's a common street name
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 2: in the Midwest. There's a social justice group called the
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 2: sin Sinawa Dominican Sisters that is dedicated to preaching and
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 2: teaching the gospel, social justice, and ecological stewardship. They are
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 2: based in Wisconsin. And there was a theory that maybe
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 2: it was a group of women doing this.
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 1: See I have, yeah, that the theory that it's women
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: that are possibly getting shitty men or something. I've heard
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 1: that as the theory. Yeah.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 2: Is that not a plot point in a season of
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 2: American Horror Story? Am I making that up?
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: It might be. There's multiple seasons of that show that
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 1: I have not watched. Yeah, but I have a cousin
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 1: who had a friend go missing after a party in
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: Iowa in college, and I guess days later they found
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 1: him and somebody had linked in theory his death to
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: this whole thing too. It was That's how I found
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 1: out about this Miley Face killer stuff.
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's a compelling theory. The reason Minnesota
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 2: comes up is one of the first deaths linked to
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 2: the Smiley Face theory was a Minneapolis college student named
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 2: Chris Jenkins. He was last seen leaving a downtown Minneapolis
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 2: bar on Halloween night in two thousand and two, and
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 2: his body was found four months later along the Mississippi River,
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 2: still wearing a Halloween costume, and police immediately wrote it
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 2: off as an accidental death because he was drunk, and
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 2: the family vehemently disagreed. They stuck to their guns, and
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 2: eventually a witness came forward saying that he not only
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 2: knew the exact location where Chris Jenkins went into the
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 2: river and also that he saw him get thrown off
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 2: a bridge. Police investigated that tip, and in a move
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 2: you literally never see out of the police held a
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 2: press conference and apologized to the family for their lazy
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 2: ass police work and changed the cause of death to homicide,
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 2: but that homicide remains unsolved. Fascinating. So someone just rolled
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 2: up and threw this dude off a bridge. Can you
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 2: imagine You're just drunkenly shuffling across a bridge and a
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 2: car just pulls up. A couple people jump out and
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 2: one of them's like, grab his legs, I'll grab his arm.
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 2: They just toss you off a fucking bridge. What a
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 2: way to go?
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, No, that would not be fun.
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 2: No, And that I remember reading about this and he
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 2: had apparently been kicked out of a bar shortly before
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 2: this happened, and there was a theory that this was
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 2: happening to like dudes who were acting up in bars
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 2: and like being a problem, Like that's how they were
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 2: getting targeted. And that reminded me of a true crime
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 2: episode I watched. I think this took place in the
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 2: Midwest also, but these two Doudes were on a motorcycle
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 2: trip across the country and they stopped in this small
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 2: town bar and were apparently just being obnoxious dicks, and
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 2: this group of dudes fucking abducted them, murdered them, and
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: fed them to pigs.
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 1: WHOA.
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so be cool if you're getting drunk and traveling
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 2: through small towns. Yeah, sometimes there's not enough police to
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 2: solve the crime.
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, you know, women poisoning, abusive spouses to
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 1: death and having people that know what's going on look
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 1: the other way?
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 2: Is it?
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 1: Part of it is a rich part of history.
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so don't you know whatever, I don't. I don't
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 1: know enough about these cases. I just remember reading about it,
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 1: you know whatever, fifteen years ago or almost I guess
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 1: almost twenty years ago now or so that like, oh shit, no,
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 1: this is a thing.
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's definitely weird. It's it's an interesting one and Hey,
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 2: that rounds out our Minnesota conspiracies episode. That's all of them.
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 2: That's every and go one, nothing else weird, unexplained conspiratorial
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 2: has ever happened in Minnesota?
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: Well, I'm trying to think of where that game that
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 1: the links lost to the.
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 2: Mercury was in the Oh that's questionable.
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, lista Thomas uh that If that game loves in
• 1:05:15
  Speaker 1: Arizona or here, I can't remember if it was here,
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: then that's a conspiracy we need to address at some point.
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, So, Andy, thank you for doing this pod. I
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 2: appreciate it. What do we have to plug before we
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 2: get out of here? I just want people to listen
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 2: to the Paul Wellstone episodes this week. I'll just put
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 2: them all up tomorrow, all four of them.
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 1: You know what. I'll listen to those.
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 2: I think it's an interesting case. And if you want
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 2: the book, I'll send it to you. It's still in
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 2: my garage. Oh shit, okay, yeah, it's fascinating and so yeah,
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 2: just do that, Andy, What do you want to plug?
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: Well, I actually you brought up the racket article. We
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 1: read a racket article for this episode, and I just
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 1: want to plug racket rack at MN they're great. Great. Well,
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 1: we don't have an all weekly anymore since City Pages stopped,
• 1:05:59
  Speaker 1: but the Rack it is basically our online all weekly
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: and it rules.
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there's another outlet called Reformer, I think, yeah, yep,
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 2: really good. That's Reformer is where I first read about
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 2: that county in Minnesota. You were talking about where they Yeah,
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 2: I think that h yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 1: Reformer and Record both great, both great local twin cities
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 1: Minnesota coverage. Also, as I mentioned at the top of
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 1: the episode, sorry look good for the boys, we actually
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 1: have a new episode out and we're gonna try to
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 1: make more so nice.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 2: And hey, check out the band Wilbur.
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, definitely listen to the band Wilburg for sure.
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 1: Check out Wilburt. Love them. Society of Chemists, great local
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 1: chamber jazz group that's releasing an album in August.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 2: And I think that's it. Let's get the fuck out
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 2: of here, and he say goodbye.
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: Let's go to the Sex Tunnels.
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 2: Bye, goodbye, everybody. We love Sex Tunnels.
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 1: About the batter in the Lava Data, the Lab, the
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 1: sept Ababa Dada and the Lava Dada Lava Data Ababa Alad.
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 2: The latter the bab, the latter in the marble lata
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 2: in the Lab