Latest / The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast / Ashley’s Mother’s Day Party!

Transcript

Ashley’s Mother’s Day Party! · The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

0:00
Speaker 1: This is the Benn and Ashley I almost Famous podcast
0:03
Speaker 1: with her radio. Hey guys, welcome to a girl's only
0:08
Speaker 1: almost same as podcast. In celebration of Mother's Day, We've
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Speaker 1: got a whole bunch of bachelor moms and well bachelor
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Speaker 1: not moms too, hanging out together in l a Um.
0:19
Speaker 1: They're going to get their nails done, their makeup done,
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Speaker 1: They're gonna go for a shopping spree at Macy's. This
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Speaker 1: podcast is brought to you because of Mazie's, which is
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Speaker 1: a great place to get your Mother's Day gift. I
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Speaker 1: mean they have everything, as you know, clothes, makeup, jewelry, perfume.
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Speaker 1: I can't think of anything that a mom would want
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Speaker 1: that you really couldn't find at Macy's. So um, I'm
0:45
Speaker 1: unfortunately not able to join them because Jared had COVID
0:49
Speaker 1: this week and I was exposed and all right, I'm
0:53
Speaker 1: so I'm having foamo over here. But a lot of
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Speaker 1: my fellow bachelor moms are having a day of pampering
1:00
Speaker 1: and just girl time over there, and I'm excited to
1:02
Speaker 1: catch up with them via zoom. So our first guest
1:07
Speaker 1: is going to be one of the most notorious bachelor moms.
1:09
Speaker 1: I guess notorious may not be. Maybe it's not the
1:12
Speaker 1: most appropriate word, but she's When you think of bachelor moms,
1:16
Speaker 1: you definitely think of Amanda standing because she so publicly
1:21
Speaker 1: dated Ben Higgins and others on Paradise Um with having
1:25
Speaker 1: two girls, and she introduced the girls too Ben on
1:30
Speaker 1: the show. So let's get Amanda on to talk about motherhood. Alright, guys,
1:37
Speaker 1: a man is standing sitting here looking cute as ever
1:40
Speaker 1: with your brunette hair. How do you feel bring a
1:42
Speaker 1: brunette now? I feel good? I love it. Actually, are
1:46
Speaker 1: you ever going to go back to blonde for the wedding? Maybe?
1:49
Speaker 1: I think just for the wedding. If it weren't for
1:52
Speaker 1: the wedding, I think I would keep it for a
1:53
Speaker 1: long time. But I feel like I need to look
1:56
Speaker 1: like myself at the wedding, and I just feel like
1:58
Speaker 1: I'm a blonde. So I feel like you're a blonde
2:01
Speaker 1: to you look beautiful both ways. But I think it
2:03
Speaker 1: would be crazy if for your wedding day you were
2:06
Speaker 1: your classic you know, um, your signature blonde. Yes, I've
2:11
Speaker 1: been blonde for thirty two years, so I got to
2:14
Speaker 1: do it for the wedding. Thirty two years. You've been
2:17
Speaker 1: blonde since birth? Your natural blonde? Okay, so I am.
2:22
Speaker 1: I was born blonde. I had blonde hair in my
2:25
Speaker 1: whole life, so probably, I mean, I think now if
2:27
Speaker 1: my roots growing brown, But I started dyeing my hair
2:30
Speaker 1: before that happened, so I've always been gotcha, got you? Yeah? Okay?
2:34
Speaker 1: So what role are your girls going to play in
2:37
Speaker 1: the wedding and how active are they in wedding planning?
2:41
Speaker 1: I feel like both of them are probably super into
2:44
Speaker 1: dress shopping and decor with you. It's so funny because
2:49
Speaker 1: Kins is so excited, she's so into it. So I
2:53
Speaker 1: decided to make her like my maid of honor because
2:56
Speaker 1: we're not having bridal parties, and then Charlie is going
2:59
Speaker 1: to be a flower girl. I fee like Charlie, She's
3:02
Speaker 1: she's very like distracted, she's not as into it. I
3:05
Speaker 1: feel like she doesn't really know like what's going on.
3:08
Speaker 1: So um Kins will be the maid of honor. Oh
3:12
Speaker 1: my god, that is so adorable, so cute. How is
3:15
Speaker 1: the wedding dress shopping going and are they going to
3:17
Speaker 1: be part of that? Yeah? So we've went We've went
3:20
Speaker 1: to a couple of places, actually, It's so funny because
3:23
Speaker 1: I was more into them trying on dresses than I was, Like,
3:27
Speaker 1: I care more about their looks than I do for mine.
3:30
Speaker 1: It's actually scaring me how much I am relaxed about
3:33
Speaker 1: the wedding planning. I feel like at the last minute,
3:35
Speaker 1: I'm going to be a brad zilla because I've been
3:38
Speaker 1: very relaxed about it all since my Amanda's been on
3:42
Speaker 1: the show. She got engaged to her fiance Michael. He
3:47
Speaker 1: has a great presence on her social media. So if
3:49
Speaker 1: you don't know Michael, now go follow her and get
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Speaker 1: to know Michael. Um, do you think that your chiller
3:58
Speaker 1: about this wedding plan because you've already been married before?
4:02
Speaker 1: I don't think so, because in my mind, I haven't
4:05
Speaker 1: been if if that makes sense, Like I don't count
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Speaker 1: my first wedding, Like it's weird for me to even
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Speaker 1: talk about. So do you not count your person wedding
4:14
Speaker 1: or your first marriage but the whole thing, it just
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Speaker 1: doesn't Yeah, Well, I had kids first, so I was
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Speaker 1: so young, and I just feel like everyone everyone gets
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Speaker 1: like one one practice round that doesn't count. So I
4:31
Speaker 1: don't think that's why. I think it's just hard when
4:34
Speaker 1: you have kids, and we're both so busy, and then
4:37
Speaker 1: adding wedding planning on top of it, like we're both
4:40
Speaker 1: so excited to get married, but we're both like super
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Speaker 1: chill about the actual wedding. Amanda, how in the world, like,
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Speaker 1: do you parents to kids have a job even though
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Speaker 1: you know your job is like you know you do
4:55
Speaker 1: it at home. Still, let's take away from any of
4:58
Speaker 1: the difficulty, because what I found is like staying home,
5:02
Speaker 1: like being a stay at home being a stay at
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Speaker 1: home mom who also does her work from home. It's
5:08
Speaker 1: really challenging because you have to like parents and work
5:13
Speaker 1: at the same time. And I know people will be
5:17
Speaker 1: little influencer working, but it's a real job. So please
5:22
Speaker 1: give me pointers on how you do this, especially a
5:25
Speaker 1: couple of years ago when the kids were younger, because
5:28
Speaker 1: now I feel like your your girls are pretty self sufficient.
5:31
Speaker 1: They are pretty self sufficient now. But it's crazy because
5:34
Speaker 1: even still, like during COVID, they were home and they
5:37
Speaker 1: were doing online school and I couldn't get anything done,
5:41
Speaker 1: Like it is impossible for me to get stuff done
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Speaker 1: when the kids are home. Even now they're in school.
5:47
Speaker 1: They're back in school now, so it's so much easier
5:49
Speaker 1: I feel like I get everything done while they're at school.
5:51
Speaker 1: Once they get home, it's just it's really hard. Everything
5:55
Speaker 1: slows down. Everything. Yeah, I'm able to do everything tech
6:00
Speaker 1: Nickeli still, but it'll take me three to four times longer. Yeah,
6:05
Speaker 1: you can get like, if you have a list of
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Speaker 1: like ten things, you can maybe get two of them done. Yes,
6:11
Speaker 1: I'm like okay. It's like Jared will be like, so
6:13
Speaker 1: would you do today, And I'm like, well, I swear
6:17
Speaker 1: to you. I didn't sit on the couch for more
6:19
Speaker 1: than an hour, and that was just when I was
6:21
Speaker 1: feeding him. But when I think about the things that
6:24
Speaker 1: I accomplished, all I can think about is that and
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Speaker 1: that and both of them. Pre baby would have probably
6:33
Speaker 1: taken me a total of like an hour and a half.
6:37
Speaker 1: I mean, it definitely gets easier, but it is still
6:40
Speaker 1: impossible for me to like work from home when the
6:42
Speaker 1: kids are home. It's it's hard. Okay, Well, I'm glad
6:48
Speaker 1: to know that I'm not alone. You're not. They start school, Oh,
6:54
Speaker 1: thank you, and probably when they start talking maybe no, yes, yes,
6:58
Speaker 1: and then they're just probably demanding yeah. Uh, let's talk
7:06
Speaker 1: about you having kids in the future. With Michael, I
7:09
Speaker 1: feel like, I know that you want more kids, um,
7:12
Speaker 1: and I know that you want a boy. So what's
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Speaker 1: the timeline on this? And I know that you can't
7:16
Speaker 1: promise yourself you're gonna get a boy, but why do
7:18
Speaker 1: you want a boy? And was the timeline? Okay? So
7:21
Speaker 1: I want to boy just because I already have two
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Speaker 1: girls and I think it'd be fun to have one
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Speaker 1: of each. But Michael and I swear we're going to
7:29
Speaker 1: just have another girl, like we think that we're just
7:32
Speaker 1: gonna have all girls. Um, So we want to be
7:35
Speaker 1: married for a year and just kind of enjoy married
7:38
Speaker 1: life before we start trying. Um. So i'd say like
7:42
Speaker 1: in the next two years, I hope. Okay, yeah, sounds good.
7:48
Speaker 1: He will be adorable and then he'll have snuggle time
7:52
Speaker 1: with George, the most amazing Golden Retriever ever. Yes, he's
7:55
Speaker 1: so cute. He's so cute. I love talk about sleepovers
8:01
Speaker 1: because you have talked about sleepovers on your insest story
8:04
Speaker 1: so many times. And I'm sure you're probably annoyed that
8:07
Speaker 1: I'm even bringing this up, but people seem so curious
8:10
Speaker 1: about it that I just want to talk about it,
8:13
Speaker 1: especially since I feel very similar to you. You don't
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Speaker 1: let your girls have sleepovers and they're still young. Okay,
8:19
Speaker 1: so what it's kids? Like nine? Kids is actually turning
8:23
Speaker 1: ten this weekend. Okay, so it's just during ten this weekend? Okay,
8:28
Speaker 1: eight and nine? I mean, so yeah, I think that's
8:32
Speaker 1: totally legit that you don't want them having sleepovers right now.
8:35
Speaker 1: Do you think that's going to change? And what's your
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Speaker 1: reasoning behind it? To be honest, I was shocked by
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Speaker 1: how many people were questioning it because I feel like
8:43
Speaker 1: it's kind of a no brainer, Not that I'm judging
8:46
Speaker 1: anyone who does let their kids have sleepovers, but I
8:48
Speaker 1: think it's pretty obvious why some people wouldn't. Um. I
8:52
Speaker 1: definitely don't see myself along allowing them to have sleepovers
8:55
Speaker 1: anytime soon. Kiins, I fully trust kids is more response
9:00
Speaker 1: able than I am. Charlie, she's never having a sleepover. Ever.
9:06
Speaker 1: I don't think, what do you think they're going to
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Speaker 1: get into at this age? I'm not so worried. I mean,
9:11
Speaker 1: I just I worry about everything. It's actually something I'm
9:14
Speaker 1: working on because even the thought of my kids like
9:18
Speaker 1: becoming teenagers and just walking to the park with their
9:22
Speaker 1: friends without me watching terrifies me. Yeah, I can no, No,
9:26
Speaker 1: I think that we should put chips in our kids.
9:28
Speaker 1: I'm not even kidding you. I know that sounds insane
9:31
Speaker 1: and like we have trackers on the phones and all that,
9:33
Speaker 1: but like they can easily drop their phone, or whoever's
9:35
Speaker 1: kidnapping them can also take their phone and turn it off.
9:39
Speaker 1: So my thought is that I would love to put
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Speaker 1: a chip in Dawson until he is eighteen, and then
9:46
Speaker 1: he could take it out. It would be like just
9:47
Speaker 1: like a dog chip, you know, because if we could
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Speaker 1: track where our dogs are if they run away. Come
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Speaker 1: on now, So do you think I'll stop when they're eighteen? Like,
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Speaker 1: my parents haven't like it when I go to a
9:58
Speaker 1: concert late at night and I'm whether I'm here in
10:02
Speaker 1: Rhode Island or at home, they always want me to
10:05
Speaker 1: text them when I get home, or they track me.
10:07
Speaker 1: They're they're always tracking me. Well that's how Kans is
10:10
Speaker 1: with me. So I was at coacher this weekend and
10:12
Speaker 1: she calls me a lot, and I didn't answer her calls,
10:15
Speaker 1: like for maybe twenty minutes, and I looked at my
10:17
Speaker 1: text and she was like, Mom, you need to text
10:19
Speaker 1: me back. You're giving me anxiety. She's so protective of me,
10:26
Speaker 1: she's so responsible, it's crazy. I was actually just telling
10:30
Speaker 1: Emma who's doing my makeup? That I'm like sometimes I'm like,
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Speaker 1: who's the parent here? But I still still won't let
10:36
Speaker 1: her do anything without me. Okay, alright, well, I mean
10:39
Speaker 1: it all makes sense. I could really talk about this
10:40
Speaker 1: and being overprotective for a while. I know it's going
10:42
Speaker 1: to sound like we're like helicopter parents, but there's lots
10:44
Speaker 1: of scary things in this world today. I think it's warranted,
10:48
Speaker 1: and I just to finish my thought. Like Dawson, if
10:52
Speaker 1: there was such a chip, he could take it out
10:55
Speaker 1: and I would never be like, you can't do this,
10:57
Speaker 1: you can't do that. I just want to know where
10:59
Speaker 1: you are and that you're safe. Like I don't like
11:01
Speaker 1: even so much. Well, I mean that's that's too vague.
11:05
Speaker 1: There's lots of bad things they could be doing. The
11:08
Speaker 1: bottom line is I just want to know that you're safe. Okay, um, yeah, anyway, okay,
11:14
Speaker 1: but sleep over at that age, like I I feel like,
11:16
Speaker 1: have them sleep over. I have them stay over at
11:18
Speaker 1: their friend's house late and then they can come home.
11:20
Speaker 1: That's what I used to do. I used to not
11:21
Speaker 1: even want to go to sleepovers. I just want to
11:24
Speaker 1: hang out with my friends late and then my mom
11:25
Speaker 1: could pay me up at eleven. Yeah, that's what we do.
11:28
Speaker 1: We call it a late over. Oh that's cute. So
11:32
Speaker 1: they can come over till it's bedtime. Yeah, that's perfect.
11:36
Speaker 1: It makes them feel adult enough exactly. Yeah. I love
11:40
Speaker 1: that constracts you because when I was in third grade,
11:42
Speaker 1: I had mad separation anxiety for my parents. Whenever we
11:45
Speaker 1: had a babysitter, I would be so worried that something
11:50
Speaker 1: was going to happen to them, and I would like
11:53
Speaker 1: I would just have to know where they were at
11:55
Speaker 1: all times. But we didn't have such technology, and it
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Speaker 1: made me so nervous. And I would love to be
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Speaker 1: a kid now and track my parents. I'm so crazy.
12:02
Speaker 1: What kind of kid wants to track their parents? Kinsley, Okay,
12:09
Speaker 1: I love the reverse situation. You're partying and having fun
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Speaker 1: like a kid at Coachella, and she's like, mom, answer
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Speaker 1: your phone. Yeah so cute though. All right, well, Amanda,
12:20
Speaker 1: I could talk to you about motherhood a lot longer,
12:22
Speaker 1: but we have so many guests to get to today,
12:24
Speaker 1: so go have fun, enjoy your shopping spree at Macie's.
12:28
Speaker 1: I'm so jealous. What are you going to get? I
12:30
Speaker 1: don't know. I just got here and I was getting
12:33
Speaker 1: made gip gum, but I'm gonna go take a look. Okay, fun,
12:36
Speaker 1: miss you by Now we are joined by not just
12:52
Speaker 1: a mother, but the mother of the Bachelor franchise, Trista
12:57
Speaker 1: Trista wren A Sutter, Trius Soter whatever you want to
12:59
Speaker 1: go sum. She's also the host of our UM spinoff show,
13:08
Speaker 1: formally Famous Or. She and Bob Guinea go back and
13:11
Speaker 1: talk about the old days of Bachelor Nation after rewatching
13:15
Speaker 1: old episodes. It's really fun. So so if you guys
13:19
Speaker 1: um have or have not watched old episodes, you can
13:23
Speaker 1: go and catch up with them, you know, go live
13:26
Speaker 1: in the like to the odds. That will be fun.
13:28
Speaker 1: Or you can relive old memories. That's also Yeah, we
13:34
Speaker 1: have a lot of fun. Okay, Trisa, we've talked about
13:36
Speaker 1: motherhood a bit. Now you're on my baby Shower podcast,
13:40
Speaker 1: so I'm going to ask you like some fun, random,
13:42
Speaker 1: not so like spiritual questions like, okay, have you given
13:51
Speaker 1: your kids the sex talk? Yes? I mean minor thirteen
13:57
Speaker 1: and fourteen, So yeah, compared to other moms here today
14:02
Speaker 1: definitely had to be done. Um, so we did it?
14:07
Speaker 1: Oh gosh, I want to say, did Ryan do your son?
14:11
Speaker 1: And then did you do? Know? Okay, so tell me
14:13
Speaker 1: everything started? Like how awkward was it? How nervous were you?
14:16
Speaker 1: Where did you do it? Did you like lock him
14:18
Speaker 1: in the car and You're like, I can't escape me here? No? Okay.
14:21
Speaker 1: So about three years ago, I was with a friend
14:25
Speaker 1: who had older kids, and I was just asking her
14:29
Speaker 1: how do I how do I do the talk? How
14:31
Speaker 1: do I what do I say? And she was like,
14:33
Speaker 1: I have a perfect book for you. So she gave
14:36
Speaker 1: me actually three books. I can't remember the name of it.
14:38
Speaker 1: I'll send it to you after I get home, but um,
14:42
Speaker 1: i'll send you the name. And so she let me
14:45
Speaker 1: borrow these books and individually I I sat down with Blakesley,
14:51
Speaker 1: and Blakesley is she's thirteen now, but she is way
14:56
Speaker 1: more chatty than Max's. Max's personality, I think we've talked
14:59
Speaker 1: about this probably is he's very much like Ryan, very
15:02
Speaker 1: stoic and introverted, and even though we have a great relationship,
15:06
Speaker 1: he is very introverted. So I was a little more
15:10
Speaker 1: worried about Max, being that it would be harder to
15:13
Speaker 1: talk to him. So I sit down with Blakesley. I
15:15
Speaker 1: was like, I want you to read this book. We
15:17
Speaker 1: kind of went through it together, and her eyes were
15:20
Speaker 1: just like saucers, you know, like what are you talking about?
15:25
Speaker 1: Your This is like the American girl book that my generation. Yes, yes,
15:31
Speaker 1: actually I almost got that book. Um, but I figured
15:34
Speaker 1: out like a puberty thing, the sex thing that's more
15:37
Speaker 1: of like a girl's body change book. Yes, but I
15:39
Speaker 1: think they I think they actually have a sex one
15:42
Speaker 1: now anyway. So so with her, she was hysterical all questions,
15:48
Speaker 1: you know, like are you kidding me? Like that's how
15:50
Speaker 1: I really what are you talking about? Like I feel
15:53
Speaker 1: like she was, um, kind of mad at me for like,
15:56
Speaker 1: you know, telling her about this thing that happens to everyone,
16:00
Speaker 1: puberty plus like you know, sex and that's how you're born,
16:03
Speaker 1: you know, did you like say did you like say explicitly?
16:06
Speaker 1: And then like the penis ki Oh yeah, we went
16:09
Speaker 1: through everything. She was truly mindful. She didn't know about No,
16:15
Speaker 1: she was younger. This was probably when she was ten.
16:18
Speaker 1: I think she was either nine or ten, and that's
16:20
Speaker 1: probably around the time like rumors started swirling at school
16:23
Speaker 1: that this is how it happened, and you're like, you
16:25
Speaker 1: are kid, and I think that TikTok had just started,
16:30
Speaker 1: and so they were like I was worried that she
16:32
Speaker 1: would find out from other people, and I wanted it
16:34
Speaker 1: to be from me, So so I told her and
16:37
Speaker 1: then Max, which you know, now he's had a phone
16:41
Speaker 1: for a while and if you try to have a
16:43
Speaker 1: conversation with him, you actually have to tell him to
16:45
Speaker 1: put his phone down so he'll listen to you. But um,
16:49
Speaker 1: he was. He sat we I did it in his room.
16:52
Speaker 1: I closed the door so he didn't feel weird about,
16:55
Speaker 1: you know, having his sister around, and we went through
16:58
Speaker 1: the book too. I left the book with him. But
17:01
Speaker 1: when we were in his room, he was completely focused
17:05
Speaker 1: on me and and what I was saying, and super
17:08
Speaker 1: respectful of everything I was saying and how I was
17:12
Speaker 1: saying it. He didn't have a ton of questions, but
17:15
Speaker 1: I was just really impressed that I didn't have to
17:18
Speaker 1: continue to tell him to pay attention and that there
17:22
Speaker 1: was this was an important conversation. Um, he was actually
17:25
Speaker 1: just really respectful and and listened, and then I left
17:28
Speaker 1: the book with him. And who knows if he actually
17:31
Speaker 1: read any of it. We've talked UM a little more
17:35
Speaker 1: about it since then. If anything ever comes up, UM,
17:40
Speaker 1: and you know how to treat a woman and how
17:43
Speaker 1: you have to be respectful and uh, I don't know.
17:46
Speaker 1: It's a really really important conversation. And I was super nervous,
17:51
Speaker 1: but it actually went really well. Do you think that
17:54
Speaker 1: he had any idea from school? I think he probably
17:57
Speaker 1: had somewhat of an idea, but he he was a
18:02
Speaker 1: little older. UM. I feel like there is one. There
18:08
Speaker 1: was a funny question he asked, but I cannot remember
18:11
Speaker 1: what it was at this point. Ryan m Room remember.
18:13
Speaker 1: But anyway, it actually just went. It went really well.
18:17
Speaker 1: Now they know. I feel like it's so important. You know,
18:20
Speaker 1: in my generation, my mom just gave me a book
18:22
Speaker 1: and that's it and didn't talk at all about it.
18:26
Speaker 1: And I wanted to be the one to have this
18:30
Speaker 1: discussion with them because I feel like it instills that, um,
18:37
Speaker 1: that sense of connection in them, so that they know
18:41
Speaker 1: that they can come to me if they have any questions,
18:43
Speaker 1: and of course go to Ryan too, but if they
18:45
Speaker 1: have any questions or any difficulties, I want them to
18:48
Speaker 1: always know that I am there for them and I
18:52
Speaker 1: am more than happy to talk about anything with them.
18:55
Speaker 1: So and when I was growing up, I didn't really
18:58
Speaker 1: feel like I could go to my parents about that stuff.
19:01
Speaker 1: It was just, you know, we hadn't talked about it
19:03
Speaker 1: at all. She just handed me a book. And so
19:06
Speaker 1: I think now Blakesley and I have really open communication
19:10
Speaker 1: and I know that she knows she can come to me,
19:12
Speaker 1: and I hope that Max does too. Oh that's awesome. Um.
19:17
Speaker 1: Is there any times that you're watching TV with them
19:20
Speaker 1: and something popped up and you're like, oh God, they're
19:22
Speaker 1: too young to address this and I know what they're
19:24
Speaker 1: going to ask about it? Oh my god, all the time,
19:27
Speaker 1: but I can't remember it now because I feel like
19:30
Speaker 1: now it comes up. Max has watched so many movies
19:35
Speaker 1: that I don't even know what movies he's watched. I'm
19:38
Speaker 1: not as worried about everything as I used to be
19:42
Speaker 1: because he's almost fifteen years old and he'll go to
19:45
Speaker 1: sleepovers and watch He loves horror movies. Oh, I cannot
19:50
Speaker 1: stand horror movies. Totally into horror movies. And I'm sure
19:53
Speaker 1: there's there's nudity and sexual content, and UM discuss sens.
20:00
Speaker 1: But um, I can't remember one specific moment, but yes,
20:04
Speaker 1: there have been a lot of moments where I feel
20:07
Speaker 1: like we pause the TV. If anything is coming up,
20:10
Speaker 1: we just pause it and then we redirect, go do
20:13
Speaker 1: something else. Let's take a break, let's go to the bathroom,
20:15
Speaker 1: and then maybe forward it to where we don't have
20:18
Speaker 1: to watch that part together. A little awkward when you're
20:21
Speaker 1: sitting with your parents and a sex scene comes on
20:23
Speaker 1: any show. Um, I do. I feel like I might
20:26
Speaker 1: have told you about this. So um, there we had
20:30
Speaker 1: iPads I don't know, like seven eight years ago, and uh,
20:38
Speaker 1: it was like a family iPad and I go on
20:41
Speaker 1: to look on Safari for something and I open it
20:44
Speaker 1: up and it is graphic. Let's just say, oh yeah, graphic.
20:53
Speaker 1: And they were young, and I was like, what it
20:58
Speaker 1: ended up? Um that I'm not gonna I'm not gonna
21:03
Speaker 1: say who did this, um, because I don't know if
21:05
Speaker 1: you know, maybe they'll listen someday. But um, it started
21:09
Speaker 1: completely innocent, and that it was around Christmas time and
21:14
Speaker 1: they were googling, um, baby Jesus, No, that's so funny.
21:27
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Oh yeah, I wonder what we'd find,
21:31
Speaker 1: would we if we google, Okay, how did baby Jesus
21:36
Speaker 1: turn into this baby Jesus? And then I think there
21:40
Speaker 1: was a picture um of like that. Then it was
21:42
Speaker 1: like baby boys and then baby boy butts. Yeah, I
21:48
Speaker 1: mean the most innocent thing turned into something not innocent
21:54
Speaker 1: at all, Like how horrifying is that? So my recommendation
21:58
Speaker 1: for parents, even if you think your kids it's we're
22:01
Speaker 1: not looking at anything, they could be googling something so
22:04
Speaker 1: so so innocent as baby Jesus, and so put the
22:08
Speaker 1: most innocent thing you can think of, the innocent thing, um,
22:12
Speaker 1: so put the there are like parental controls on Google
22:16
Speaker 1: that you can um. I think every parent should do it,
22:19
Speaker 1: no matter how young or old your kids are. Okay,
22:23
Speaker 1: well those are some good tips. I mean maybe not Dawson.
22:25
Speaker 1: He's not using it, but soon enough. Right now, he's
22:29
Speaker 1: just really into his high contrast book. Yes, I saw that.
22:33
Speaker 1: That was so cute. It's so cute. It's just black
22:37
Speaker 1: and white imagery, and he he you throw it in
22:40
Speaker 1: front of his face and then all of a sudden
22:42
Speaker 1: he goes like his eyes just grow. It's so adorable. Enough.
22:48
Speaker 1: I'm so sad he's not here. And you love your
22:53
Speaker 1: responses on Instagram. So sweet. Oh yes, I love him,
22:57
Speaker 1: love you. Thank you cut right, well, thanks for the
23:02
Speaker 1: sex advice for my son in about a decade. Exactly.
23:07
Speaker 1: You got a little time, Um, go enjoy your Macy's shopping,
23:12
Speaker 1: and do you have any idea what you're gonna get,
23:14
Speaker 1: Like if you had to, like say, your kids could
23:17
Speaker 1: get you one thing from Macy's right now for Mother's Day?
23:20
Speaker 1: What is at the top of your list? I don't
23:23
Speaker 1: know if they carry aviator Nation, but I'm super into
23:26
Speaker 1: that brand right now. What as is my daughter? It's
23:30
Speaker 1: like the rainbow they have like a rainbow stripe on
23:32
Speaker 1: the side of the sweatpants or like across the jacket
23:35
Speaker 1: like puffy coats. Um, that sounds so it's so cute.
23:40
Speaker 1: Actually it's it's adorable. And then, um, honestly, I need jeans.
23:46
Speaker 1: I need jeans, Like, give me some just good ripped
23:50
Speaker 1: up jeans and I'm a happy girl. All right, Well,
23:52
Speaker 1: I think you can go find that at Macy's today.
23:54
Speaker 1: So I have a great time shopping with the ladies.
23:56
Speaker 1: Thank you, thanks for having me even though you're not here. Course, Okay,
24:01
Speaker 1: thanks for like basically holding the fork down over there.
24:04
Speaker 1: Oh no, all good, all good. I got you okay
24:07
Speaker 1: by and before we get dog Mom Kitlin Miller Keys
24:13
Speaker 1: on the podcast, I just wanted to thank Macy's one
24:16
Speaker 1: more time for being the sponsor for this week's show.
24:21
Speaker 1: Anything that you can think of for your mom for
24:23
Speaker 1: Mother's Day you could probably find at Macy's and you
24:25
Speaker 1: can find it at Macy's dot com slash gift finder
24:29
Speaker 1: if you just want to do your shopping online or
24:31
Speaker 1: you can find something online, then go and run to
24:33
Speaker 1: the store and pick it up. All right, We got
24:45
Speaker 1: Klin on the line, and she's the kind of mom
24:49
Speaker 1: that I was just a mere three months ago, a
24:51
Speaker 1: dog mom. Caitlin, what is the biggest responsibility as an
24:56
Speaker 1: adoptive dog mom? Because you guys have basically fall stirred
25:00
Speaker 1: twice and then you've ended up adopting. So what is
25:04
Speaker 1: it that you just like have in your soul that
25:07
Speaker 1: is like I need to mother these dogs? Well, it's
25:12
Speaker 1: so weird. If Dean hadn't broken his flag, what was
25:16
Speaker 1: it like two years ago? I don't think we ever
25:18
Speaker 1: would have had a dog because we were just traveling
25:20
Speaker 1: too much. Um So before he broke his leg, we
25:23
Speaker 1: were only home like one week at a time, and
25:25
Speaker 1: then he broke his leg. We fostered Pappy, we fell
25:28
Speaker 1: in love, and once Pappy past, we just felt this
25:32
Speaker 1: little emptiness in our homes. So then we found Alister
25:36
Speaker 1: and adopted Alistair. But we've always been drawn to seniors
25:39
Speaker 1: because puppies are always going to get adopted, and I
25:43
Speaker 1: think the senior ones, like people look at them, they're like, oh,
25:45
Speaker 1: they're five or six or seven, and we don't want that.
25:48
Speaker 1: We want our dog to it for a long time,
25:49
Speaker 1: and but senior dogs are just the best. Ever. I
25:52
Speaker 1: encourage everyone to at least look at them. Well, that
25:57
Speaker 1: is so sweet. That is so so sweet. You guys
26:01
Speaker 1: really like create a cool life for your dogs, Like
26:04
Speaker 1: you know, they travel with you, they go to events
26:06
Speaker 1: and stuff like that. Do you find that that is
26:09
Speaker 1: something that keeps them young? I honestly think so. I
26:14
Speaker 1: think traveling with dogs like they're always finding new things
26:17
Speaker 1: to see, new things to smell. I think it definitely
26:21
Speaker 1: gave Happy a longer life. We haven't been able to
26:23
Speaker 1: travel too much with Alistair yet, just because he is
26:27
Speaker 1: more different Colt. He's with the trainer right now and
26:31
Speaker 1: we're hoping like soon enough and the trainer even said
26:33
Speaker 1: last night, soon enough we have people and he can
26:37
Speaker 1: be around people. It's just getting him trained first. And
26:42
Speaker 1: my last question for you is something that like I
26:44
Speaker 1: struggle with now being a mom to a dog and
26:47
Speaker 1: a baby, and that is like how much do you
26:53
Speaker 1: play with the dog during the day or does your
26:55
Speaker 1: dog just kind of like lounge around? Because I feel
26:58
Speaker 1: so guilty because I'm like, I need like a designated
27:00
Speaker 1: play hour with Lois where she just gets all the
27:03
Speaker 1: pets and we play catch and all that, but I
27:05
Speaker 1: don't have time for it. Is that something that you
27:10
Speaker 1: guys do on a daily basis? Is like it's just playtime? Yeah,
27:15
Speaker 1: it's kind of on Alistair's terms, Like Alistair gets super
27:18
Speaker 1: hyper and suddenly he'll be like he'll just like start
27:21
Speaker 1: play nipping at her hand or like pulling on our
27:24
Speaker 1: shirt and he lets us know, like now it's time
27:26
Speaker 1: for you to throw the joy. It's time for you
27:28
Speaker 1: to pay attention to me. Okay, that's so sweet. That
27:32
Speaker 1: also keeps them young and their heart healthy. And oh,
27:36
Speaker 1: there's not enough time in a day to be any
27:38
Speaker 1: sort of mom. We need I need like another twelve
27:41
Speaker 1: hours to really accomplish everything. I can't imagine it from
27:44
Speaker 1: your perspective, but I feel that from just a jog
27:47
Speaker 1: mom to perspective. Thank you all right, Umklin, thanks for
27:52
Speaker 1: joining us and um you can hear Kaylin regularly on
27:57
Speaker 1: the Help I Suck At Dating podcast. Thanks for being here,
28:00
Speaker 1: Kalen Thy, thank you. Than We are now joined by
28:05
Speaker 1: another bachelor mom, Ashley Fraser. My son wants to make
28:09
Speaker 1: a little cameo appearance, so if you hear him winding
28:13
Speaker 1: in the background, that's just some saying Hi Ashley. UM,
28:18
Speaker 1: My first question for you is does it ever get
28:23
Speaker 1: to feel routine? Do you ever get used to the
28:26
Speaker 1: fact that I am now sitting with a baby carrier
28:30
Speaker 1: on my chest and my hair in a classic bomb bun.
28:34
Speaker 1: Haven't washed my face yet today, but I'm proud to
28:37
Speaker 1: say that I have brushed my teeth. I will say
28:40
Speaker 1: it just changes. Like this stage, it just is one
28:43
Speaker 1: and then the next one is gonna be totally different,
28:46
Speaker 1: and it's just gonna be as hard. It's just different.
28:49
Speaker 1: It changes. But how do you do to like? How
28:54
Speaker 1: oh Dawson, how do you do too? It doesn't it
28:58
Speaker 1: seem possible? How a part are your girls? There? Two
29:01
Speaker 1: years apart almost to the day. Find that to be
29:05
Speaker 1: like ideal. Um, Jared and I are both two and
29:08
Speaker 1: a half years apart from our siblings, and that's kind
29:11
Speaker 1: of what I want for Dawson. Um. Was it helpful
29:14
Speaker 1: that the one was able to talk and walk at
29:17
Speaker 1: that point? Yes, since she was potty trained and so
29:21
Speaker 1: pretty much potty trained all the way, so that was
29:24
Speaker 1: very helpful. So, oh, he's so cute. I can't ry
29:30
Speaker 1: pretty trained by two, I feel like that. But I mean,
29:34
Speaker 1: we were in COVID, so we didn't having too much
29:37
Speaker 1: to do, so it made it a little easier of
29:39
Speaker 1: a time. No one was going anywhere, so we didn't
29:42
Speaker 1: have to worry about it. As Ashley is now listening
29:45
Speaker 1: to my baby crying and the way I look. I
29:51
Speaker 1: have to know what was the hardest phase of motherhood
29:54
Speaker 1: for you thus far and what was the most rewarding
29:57
Speaker 1: In your favorite I would say at the beginning, when
30:00
Speaker 1: I first had Navy, my oldest, it was really hard
30:04
Speaker 1: because I let so many outside voices fulfill this like
30:09
Speaker 1: need to be a perfect mom. And I was telling
30:13
Speaker 1: someone earlier. Once I probably hit three or four months,
30:16
Speaker 1: I realized, no one's going to know whether I take
30:19
Speaker 1: their advice or not, why don't I just do it
30:21
Speaker 1: my way? And Aaron and I had a big conversation
30:24
Speaker 1: about it, and he's like, do what your gut tells you.
30:26
Speaker 1: You know, He's very much like, you're the mom, you
30:29
Speaker 1: have the intuition. I'll follow your lead, which is very helpful.
30:32
Speaker 1: And I know that a lot of people don't get that,
30:35
Speaker 1: but he was so helpful in that and that was priceless.
30:38
Speaker 1: But once I let go, it really became so much
30:42
Speaker 1: easier because I was just just let what my gut
30:45
Speaker 1: said lead me. Besides that, was there anything that you
30:50
Speaker 1: did significantly different between your first and second No, I
30:55
Speaker 1: pretty much followed that gud of what felt right in
30:59
Speaker 1: the moment. I mean I breastfed both of them for
31:01
Speaker 1: such a long time. Um, Navy I breastfed for eighteen months,
31:06
Speaker 1: was pregnant, and then I breastfed Everley over a year,
31:12
Speaker 1: So I mean maybe that was a little bit different.
31:15
Speaker 1: But you know, we were in COVID, so we were
31:18
Speaker 1: home a lot too, versus with Navy. We were out
31:22
Speaker 1: and about showing her to everyone, and then the next
31:24
Speaker 1: one we were just home, so that was very different.
31:27
Speaker 1: Oh well, I've got to know, do you see any
31:31
Speaker 1: differences between the two, possibly because one one out more
31:34
Speaker 1: than the other. Funny you say that because Everley growing
31:39
Speaker 1: up in COVID is more outgoing than Navy. Navy is
31:42
Speaker 1: pretty shy, which I'm surprised that that is not the
31:47
Speaker 1: opposite way Everley. You would think, not being around people
31:50
Speaker 1: as much, she would be more shy, but she's not.
31:52
Speaker 1: So she's more my outgoing butterfly ash. We are um
31:59
Speaker 1: between a new business, a new house, and a new baby.
32:04
Speaker 1: Jared and I definitely have not had a lot of
32:07
Speaker 1: date time couple time. How do you keep the relationship
32:13
Speaker 1: thriving in a time like this because we're certainly not
32:18
Speaker 1: not do like we are great. We're just we are
32:21
Speaker 1: not romantic, We're not like it's not like, oh, we're
32:25
Speaker 1: just a cute, young, sprite couple. Is that gone forever? No,
32:30
Speaker 1: it's not gone forever. I promise it comes back. But
32:34
Speaker 1: just go out take some time for you guys. And
32:38
Speaker 1: someone once told me, go out and can you try
32:40
Speaker 1: to not talk about the baby for a minute, And
32:43
Speaker 1: we do try that. It's really hard because you think
32:45
Speaker 1: about how cute they are and you miss them and
32:48
Speaker 1: then you go down this little memory of like, oh
32:50
Speaker 1: my gosh, look how big navy is from last year
32:52
Speaker 1: at this time, and but it does come back. It's
32:55
Speaker 1: not gone forever, I promise. Okay. That is really really
32:59
Speaker 1: good to know. Um. And is there any advice from
33:04
Speaker 1: your mom or just like observations that you had growing
33:08
Speaker 1: up that you implant implemented in the lives of your daughters. Yeah,
33:13
Speaker 1: that's really good. I think making sure they're in church,
33:16
Speaker 1: our family is in church is such a good point
33:18
Speaker 1: for us because at the end of the day, that's
33:21
Speaker 1: the foundation that I want them raised on. So that's
33:23
Speaker 1: really important to me. My mom was tough. She you know,
33:28
Speaker 1: if you weren't bleeding, you're fine, and so if you
33:31
Speaker 1: weren't bleeding, keep going. Aaron is probably more nurturing when
33:36
Speaker 1: it comes to like girls getting boo boos, Like he
33:38
Speaker 1: runs to them, and now they're starting to run to
33:41
Speaker 1: him anytime they get a boo boo and I'm like,
33:43
Speaker 1: you're okay, you're not like you know, So that's something
33:46
Speaker 1: my mom definitely passed down, like this little tough cookie
33:49
Speaker 1: side of you're it's it's really just all going to
33:52
Speaker 1: be okay, and your mom instinct. You can hear the cries,
33:56
Speaker 1: you can hear the woes, the mommy crying. You know
33:59
Speaker 1: when they yell for you, you you know the difference between
34:02
Speaker 1: whether they're hurt or they're not. So that's you know totally.
34:08
Speaker 1: It's so funny now, Like every time I am not
34:12
Speaker 1: in the same room as him, I can just it's
34:15
Speaker 1: like I have a supersonic ear for crying. Now, I
34:22
Speaker 1: wouldn't normally be able to hear like that level. Right.
34:25
Speaker 1: Have you been in the shower and heard him crying? Yes,
34:28
Speaker 1: I swear I've figured it out. I think it's the drain.
34:31
Speaker 1: It's the way the water flows into the drain. It
34:34
Speaker 1: makes me think like my child is crying in the
34:37
Speaker 1: background one and like, But for the most part, it's not.
34:42
Speaker 1: It's nothing. I don't know, irrational fear that that is
34:49
Speaker 1: exactly when something terrible is going to happen. When I'm
34:53
Speaker 1: washing my hair soapas and my hair and I'm naked,
34:56
Speaker 1: something is going to happen in that moment where I
34:58
Speaker 1: have to rush someone to the hospital. That is my like,
35:01
Speaker 1: when I think about what could be a nightmare that
35:03
Speaker 1: moment showing up at the hospital like that, do you
35:07
Speaker 1: have any other anxieties that started when you first became
35:12
Speaker 1: a mom that have kind of continued on. Yeah, I
35:15
Speaker 1: I Aaron and I have this conversation all the time.
35:17
Speaker 1: I feel I hate to say it, but I feel
35:19
Speaker 1: like I became so morbid. I'm so fearful if something
35:22
Speaker 1: happening to me. Yeah, my stairs for me, It's like,
35:26
Speaker 1: every single time I go down the stairs with him,
35:28
Speaker 1: I just see us falling. Don't walk with socks on
35:32
Speaker 1: on woodstairs. Yeah, all those things I've learned to not do.
35:35
Speaker 1: I'm just always afraid, Like when I travel, when I leave,
35:38
Speaker 1: whenever I come, when I go, when they leave, when
35:40
Speaker 1: they come and go, who's driving them. I've got to
35:43
Speaker 1: the point where I just really don't even want anyone
35:45
Speaker 1: driving my child but me or Aaron. There's no need
35:48
Speaker 1: for it. I don't think that anybody has driven him
35:51
Speaker 1: other than me and Jared, and I don't think I
35:53
Speaker 1: want that to change. Just sorry, I just gave you
35:55
Speaker 1: that anxiety. Now I've had the anxiety. Man, what is
36:00
Speaker 1: the grandparents? His parents are like, we can keep a
36:03
Speaker 1: car seat base in our cars too, just in case,
36:06
Speaker 1: and I'm like, just definitely not you, Grandpa. Friend, because
36:12
Speaker 1: you can drive. Just say yes, because at the end
36:15
Speaker 1: you can kind of probably figure it out. Those are
36:17
Speaker 1: other tips that I realized. You can kind of just
36:20
Speaker 1: say okay, fine, that's great, and then you don't have
36:23
Speaker 1: to take it, or you can figure something out and say,
36:25
Speaker 1: you know what, I'm going to do it this time,
36:27
Speaker 1: or Jared's going to take him this time. You know,
36:29
Speaker 1: you can always figure out ways to maneuver around those situations.
36:32
Speaker 1: I promise. Okay, Well, I really appreciate the advice, and
36:37
Speaker 1: I'm really glad you got to spend the day with
36:40
Speaker 1: Macy's getting your nails done and then like shopping and
36:43
Speaker 1: all of that. If there is one item at Macy's
36:46
Speaker 1: that your girls could get you for Mother's Day, what
36:49
Speaker 1: would you want it to be? Oh? Man, maybe some
36:51
Speaker 1: Chanelle makeup. That's an easy go to, right, yes, that
36:57
Speaker 1: is yeah, look at him. My goodness, I'm like heynes Okay, So,
37:05
Speaker 1: thank you for joining us. Had a great day. I did,
37:08
Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Ashley. Next up, on our Mother'sday special,
37:22
Speaker 1: we have Annelie's puccini with her baby dog and her mom.
37:27
Speaker 1: So Annelie's how long have you been a puppy mom?
37:31
Speaker 1: We got posy in August and it's her one year
37:36
Speaker 1: birthday next month, so yeah, she's just a little one.
37:40
Speaker 1: Still so cute. How has that adjustment been Because people
37:46
Speaker 1: talk about waking up all the time with a human baby,
37:50
Speaker 1: but those little puppies will wake you up a lot
37:53
Speaker 1: in the middle of the night too. And and you
37:55
Speaker 1: know what's nice, um, with my baby, my baby baby,
38:00
Speaker 1: if he goes to the bathroom, all I have to
38:03
Speaker 1: do is go into his nursery and change him. But
38:06
Speaker 1: in the dog situation, you might be you know, if
38:09
Speaker 1: you're trying to properly drain walking them at four or
38:13
Speaker 1: thirty in the morning, and that freaks me out, you know.
38:17
Speaker 1: So it's kind of funny. I'm so used to like
38:19
Speaker 1: dog life that there's been multiple times with Dawson it's like, oh,
38:24
Speaker 1: after the speedy I'm going to have to take him out.
38:26
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, you don't have to take him out.
38:27
Speaker 1: You just got to just piper. It's very really easy.
38:30
Speaker 1: I can do what I want to do it. Well,
38:31
Speaker 1: I guess you could. I mean they kind of tell
38:33
Speaker 1: you when they're like, okay, you get this thing off me. Um.
38:37
Speaker 1: But there was many times in the beginning that I
38:39
Speaker 1: was like taking her out in the middle of the night,
38:42
Speaker 1: and uh, but you get used to it and you're
38:44
Speaker 1: just like it's funny. I think it's probably like with
38:46
Speaker 1: with a baby baby too. You just you you're like
38:50
Speaker 1: you do for the people and the things that you love,
38:53
Speaker 1: you know, and you like you're you're you forget like
38:56
Speaker 1: what you're doing, and you're just like your natural instincts taken,
38:59
Speaker 1: you know, take over, like for your baby or for
39:02
Speaker 1: your dog or whatever. Mm hmm. Now your mom's there,
39:07
Speaker 1: she is. How many kids do you have, Sally? Just one?
39:11
Speaker 1: That's all I could. You know, I got one, good one.
39:14
Speaker 1: I wanted to like five or six, but I only
39:16
Speaker 1: got one. My mom was told she could never have kids. Actually, yeah,
39:19
Speaker 1: she's a miracle baby here. Oh my gosh, a miracle.
39:23
Speaker 1: That's amazing. Um So because of that and because there
39:27
Speaker 1: was only one child, what do you guys feel like
39:31
Speaker 1: your relationship is even closer Do you think there's more
39:34
Speaker 1: of a friendship relationship than maybe if there's multiple siblings. Um? Yeah,
39:39
Speaker 1: probably because we didn't have to divide time with other
39:42
Speaker 1: you know, brothers, sisters. But she was always really popularly
39:45
Speaker 1: their friends who had siblings because she'd play with the
39:47
Speaker 1: siblings and and you know, the parents would love that
39:53
Speaker 1: since you did have um, since she was a miracle baby.
39:57
Speaker 1: Do you think about other people that were in your
40:00
Speaker 1: position on Mother's Day and the fact that you know
40:04
Speaker 1: a lot of women out there one moms and they're
40:07
Speaker 1: having a hard time doing so, Oh yeah, definitely. I
40:10
Speaker 1: mean I pretty much thought we were gonna have to
40:12
Speaker 1: just well, it wasn't a bad way to go, but
40:15
Speaker 1: we were in the process of adopting, and my mom
40:17
Speaker 1: did in vitro and she I mean, she was definitely
40:19
Speaker 1: one of the I mean, you could probably relate to
40:21
Speaker 1: a lot of women that have had a trouble, have
40:24
Speaker 1: had trouble getting pregnant or you know, yeah, it seemed
40:28
Speaker 1: like all my friends were getting pregnant, but before they
40:30
Speaker 1: even wanted to, you know, with the first time they
40:33
Speaker 1: even thought about it, it was like there they were. Um,
40:37
Speaker 1: so it's kind of one of the last lest of
40:39
Speaker 1: my friends. But um, you know, I didn't give up
40:42
Speaker 1: hope that either we had adopt or it happened naturally.
40:44
Speaker 1: And once I had her, I said, okay, now I
40:47
Speaker 1: can keep going. But and I have a step brother now,
40:50
Speaker 1: so it feels like it's funny how you know, how
40:55
Speaker 1: how family just like comes together at some point. Now
40:57
Speaker 1: we just have a big modern family and nieces and
41:01
Speaker 1: nephews and you know, like my stepdad's ex wife comes
41:06
Speaker 1: to holiday functions and you know, it's just like one
41:09
Speaker 1: big extended family, which is so nice. You know, you
41:11
Speaker 1: don't always get the family that you thought you were
41:13
Speaker 1: going to get, but you get the family that you
41:16
Speaker 1: you need. Well in her her stepbrother is also an
41:21
Speaker 1: only child, so both of them wouldn't have had, you know,
41:23
Speaker 1: extended family, So it worked out. That does work out
41:26
Speaker 1: really nicely. Analyst, Do you want to be a mom
41:29
Speaker 1: one day? Oh? Absolutely, I'm in the process of freezing
41:32
Speaker 1: my eggs right now, so hopefully that's in the cards.
41:37
Speaker 1: When did you decide that? If you don't mind, I'd
41:39
Speaker 1: love to get to know a little bit more about
41:41
Speaker 1: that decision. Um, It's been something I've been thinking about
41:44
Speaker 1: for I mean a long time, but it's just hard
41:47
Speaker 1: because you I'm thirty seven now, so I feel like
41:50
Speaker 1: every relationships that I've been in, I'm like, maybe this
41:54
Speaker 1: is the one that I'm gonna have kids with, and
41:57
Speaker 1: I'll hold off and then that relationship doesn't work out,
42:00
Speaker 1: and then I put it off a little bit longer,
42:02
Speaker 1: and then I think you can put off certain things
42:04
Speaker 1: in your life. But I think at thirty seven now
42:07
Speaker 1: I'm like, Okay, I gotta stop putting this off and
42:09
Speaker 1: I need to even if I am in the perfect
42:12
Speaker 1: relationship that I think maybe this is the guy, Like,
42:15
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna wait for that to be the reason
42:18
Speaker 1: that I, um wait anymore. I'm this is like it's
42:21
Speaker 1: a fully decision for me at this point where I'm like,
42:24
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna do it and it's gonna be my
42:26
Speaker 1: little nest egg and if I need them, I need them.
42:28
Speaker 1: You know. Do you think that's going to take the
42:31
Speaker 1: pressure off dating and you can just kind of relax
42:33
Speaker 1: and enjoy without feeling your biological clock tick? Oh? I
42:36
Speaker 1: think absolutely. I've heard so many stories of people be
42:39
Speaker 1: like yeah, as soon as I like, you don't have
42:42
Speaker 1: that energy of like I needed this to happen. You know,
42:46
Speaker 1: you're not forcing it anymore, Like I I completely feel you. Um,
42:51
Speaker 1: I was going to give it. I was going to
42:53
Speaker 1: give egg freezing to myself for my thirtieth birthday if
42:56
Speaker 1: it weren't for Jared coming around just like a couple
42:59
Speaker 1: of weeks beforehand. Yeah, I think. I mean it's a
43:01
Speaker 1: smart decision. I think for anyone who's like who that's
43:04
Speaker 1: a that's a question. It's just a yeah, look into it,
43:09
Speaker 1: see what you're able to do, and and and put
43:13
Speaker 1: your you know, fertility before anything else, because you know
43:17
Speaker 1: you're you don't have forever with that. That's the thing.
43:20
Speaker 1: There's a timeline for sure, I know. Um, so what
43:25
Speaker 1: what part of the process are you about now? If
43:27
Speaker 1: you don't mind sharing fairly I mean fairly early. I'm
43:31
Speaker 1: I think my my retrieval is scheduled right now for
43:35
Speaker 1: May five, so right around the corner. I mean, awesome, Yeah,
43:40
Speaker 1: I know, but I mean it's pretty at this stage,
43:43
Speaker 1: it's pretty easy. Um, there's nothing I really have to
43:45
Speaker 1: do except for like tell my doctor when I'm on
43:48
Speaker 1: my period or not, and then that's it. To kind
43:50
Speaker 1: of figure out really yeah, to figure out like when
43:53
Speaker 1: it is going to be the best time to collect
43:56
Speaker 1: the eggs. I thought that you had to do shots
43:59
Speaker 1: in the Mormon and so I will, but it won't
44:02
Speaker 1: be until I think it's next week. I go in
44:05
Speaker 1: on Monday actually, and then we'll start like figuring out
44:10
Speaker 1: when that all happens. Honestly, I feel so naive. It's
44:13
Speaker 1: funny because I've always felt like I get babies, I
44:16
Speaker 1: get you know. I've always been really into fertility and
44:20
Speaker 1: like motherhood and all that stuff. Um, So I thought
44:24
Speaker 1: that it would be something that I know a little
44:25
Speaker 1: bit more about. But going in for my first appointment,
44:27
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, my gosh, I know nothing about
44:29
Speaker 1: this process. I mean, when my mom did in vitro.
44:32
Speaker 1: It's funny. Um my only memory really of it was
44:36
Speaker 1: her and my dad were kind of like in a
44:39
Speaker 1: rocky place at that time, and so when my dad left,
44:42
Speaker 1: she was still in the process of of the hormones,
44:46
Speaker 1: and so I gave her a couple of her shots
44:49
Speaker 1: like as a child. Wow. Wow, Okay, Well, I mean
44:54
Speaker 1: I know I'm getting kind of personal here, but I
44:56
Speaker 1: am curious and like I am vulnerable. You know that
45:00
Speaker 1: Analy's was your miracle baby because the doctor said that
45:04
Speaker 1: you probably wouldn't be able to conceive naturally, but you
45:07
Speaker 1: but you did. No. I I got pregnant, but then
45:09
Speaker 1: I lost the baby and then they said my other
45:11
Speaker 1: tube was was damaged and this and that. So they said,
45:15
Speaker 1: you know, you have like ten chance of maybe ever
45:17
Speaker 1: getting pregnant on your own. And I just you know,
45:20
Speaker 1: every cycle that I wasn't, I kept thinking, oh my goodness.
45:23
Speaker 1: So then we were looking in vitro. Well, we lived
45:26
Speaker 1: in an adoption first and then we had her, so
45:29
Speaker 1: I didn't think I need to go in vitro because
45:31
Speaker 1: I thought i'd do it naturally again. But so in
45:33
Speaker 1: v was after me. Yeah, okay, so you did start
45:36
Speaker 1: that after you. It's amazing to know that thirty seven
45:40
Speaker 1: years ago we were doing IVF. Yeah, certainly something that
45:44
Speaker 1: they didn't talk about too much back then. Yeah, I
45:46
Speaker 1: think it was a lot more taboo, like you know,
45:49
Speaker 1: you you weren't there was something broken, you know, if
45:53
Speaker 1: if you had to go that route, and so I
45:54
Speaker 1: think a lot of people kept it so much more
45:56
Speaker 1: hidden where it's like I love that now and we're
46:00
Speaker 1: having you know, children later in life and like all
46:03
Speaker 1: of these things that or I've had like friends who
46:06
Speaker 1: have not postpartum, but like they have depression during their
46:10
Speaker 1: pregnancy and you know, we'll struggle with that. So I'm
46:13
Speaker 1: so glad that there's so many of these like topics
46:16
Speaker 1: around that because we see it's like Instagram versus reality.
46:19
Speaker 1: We see like one version of things that just seems
46:22
Speaker 1: so blissful and wonderful. I'm sure there's moments that are
46:25
Speaker 1: like that, but and I'm sure there's some people that
46:27
Speaker 1: that's how it is. But then there's all these other stories,
46:30
Speaker 1: and it's good that people are being able to feel
46:33
Speaker 1: seen in in those stories, you know, Yes, And I'm
46:36
Speaker 1: so grateful for you guys both share sharing both of
46:39
Speaker 1: those journeys. I really appreciate that it was an aspect
46:44
Speaker 1: of motherhood that I didn't think we were gonna be
46:46
Speaker 1: able to talk about today, and I'm glad we did. Yeah,
46:49
Speaker 1: I'm so distracted because Dawson's little face so silly right now, listeners.
46:57
Speaker 1: His eyes are just bugging out of his head looking
46:59
Speaker 1: at the scory. All right, Well, thank you ladies for
47:03
Speaker 1: joining us. I hope you had a great day thanks
47:05
Speaker 1: to Macie's and you're able to get some goodies for
47:10
Speaker 1: Mother's Day. To you, I have a little something in
47:12
Speaker 1: the I literally put in the mail for you yesterday.
47:16
Speaker 1: So is that a book? It's a book and a
47:18
Speaker 1: little something for Dawson. So thank you so much. Yeah,
47:22
Speaker 1: analy's quickly, please tell everybody about your new book. I
47:25
Speaker 1: wrote a book called a p Unwritten. It is a
47:27
Speaker 1: collection of my poetry and art that sort of journeys
47:31
Speaker 1: through love, heartbreak and healing and uh and it's just amazing.
47:36
Speaker 1: It's like I've gotten so much feedback already of people
47:38
Speaker 1: who have been like, oh, I totally conceive my story
47:41
Speaker 1: and that I relate and I feel like when at
47:43
Speaker 1: the end of the day, like, that's why I think
47:45
Speaker 1: people love you so much, because you're so relatable and
47:48
Speaker 1: so many levels, and like why I think talking about
47:51
Speaker 1: all of these things and like and sharing just a raw,
47:54
Speaker 1: vulnerable version of like my heartbreak and things that I've
47:58
Speaker 1: been through. It's just it gives people a chance to
48:01
Speaker 1: feel like they're being seen. So I think it's so important. Awesome.
48:04
Speaker 1: I'm so excited to read it. Yeah, you'll get it soon.
48:08
Speaker 1: Thank you, all right, see a lady, it's bye. Thank
48:11
Speaker 1: you all right almost a misus listeners. That is our
48:14
Speaker 1: Mother's Day special addition, thanks to Macy's, don't forget to
48:19
Speaker 1: head over to Macy's dot com slash gift finder if
48:23
Speaker 1: you have no idea what to get your mom, okay,
48:25
Speaker 1: because Macy's has got you covered in that department. And
48:28
Speaker 1: you can order it right there on the website, or
48:30
Speaker 1: you can go find something online and then go pick
48:34
Speaker 1: it up in store. They have everything you know, think
48:36
Speaker 1: about it, make up, perfume, how swears, um clothes, shoes.
48:44
Speaker 1: Macy's has got some beautiful stuff in there, So check
48:47
Speaker 1: it out. And thank you again to all the moms
48:49
Speaker 1: who joined us, and shout out to all the moms
48:52
Speaker 1: out there. Now more than ever, I have an appreciation
48:57
Speaker 1: for all the hard work that is involved in our lives.
49:00
Speaker 1: You guys are all seriously superwomen. Bye. Follow the Benn
49:05
Speaker 1: and Ashley I Almost Famous podcasts on I Heart Radio
49:08
Speaker 1: or subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.