Latest / Smooth Critical / C1 Ep.19: It Takes Two to Trance

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C1 Ep.19: It Takes Two to Trance · Smooth Critical

0:19
Welcome back to Smooth Critical. I'm your DM, Avni.
0:23
Quick question, Avni, are you OK?
0:26
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Avni, are you OK?
0:30
Are you OK, Avni? I am smashing unlike that
0:36
armored man, bullywug and high elf that the monos all smashed.
0:42
Well OK, let it say that. It says I'm a little.
0:45
Bit. More sexual.
0:46
A little more sexual than I intended.
0:50
Has entered the arena. Everyone's going back and
0:53
checking the last episode. OK, Smash doesn't beat bodies to
0:59
a bloody and unconscious state, right?
1:01
Didn't Didn't Abe actually smush the bullywug?
1:04
Yeah, X position match. More like sex position match.
1:08
Oh God, OK there. X in the city.
1:10
I think we'll be visiting this, I'm sure.
1:14
Well, you guys all fought very valiantly and let me introduce
1:19
you to my three gorgeous gladiators.
1:22
He my. Hello, it's Abe.
1:25
Very honest. Did you did you forget?
1:27
Oh, OK. Honest Abe, did you come up with
1:31
that? Sometimes too honest Abe, you
1:34
know, original idea, original nickname.
1:36
Might be using that going forward.
1:38
Harry. Bonta Willowind, who can never
1:40
tell a lie. To his.
1:42
Father to my father, my father's Cherry Tree.
1:46
OK, yeah, they have. And Charlie?
1:50
It's hey, it's, it's gumbo lobotomy.
1:52
I'm not, I'm not exactly a figure in American history or
1:55
anything like that, but but yeah, oh, wait, wait.
1:59
I was supposed. It's, it's, it's gumbo Lobo to
2:03
me. Haha.
2:04
That's. Me.
2:06
I'm pretty sure gumbo lobotomy was what I wrote my APUS history
2:12
thing on, which is probably. Why I got a one?
2:13
On it, but I can't believe they even gave me a score all right,
2:19
let's start our recap after an odd look from a man into the
2:23
crowd. What the hell did I just say
2:27
after feeling? A little silly today, guys.
2:32
We're feeling a. Little silly I got this.
2:35
I got this. After an odd look from a man in
2:38
the crowd, Beau was ushered into the cage for his one-on-one
2:42
fight against a heavily armored man.
2:44
The matchup seemed unfair to the onlookers as Beau was portraying
2:48
himself. As a skinny, weak orc with a
2:50
limp. The odds were not in Beau's
2:52
favor, but the two traded blows back and forth for a while, with
2:56
Bond secretly helping heal Beau as Bunty distracted Glorp, a
3:00
large Goliath, and Vaidu, a crazy Kenku who ran the place.
3:03
The fight was tough, but Beau inadvertently charmed this man.
3:07
This Midwestern orc won the sympathies of the helmed man,
3:10
who agreed to let Beau win in exchange for 500 gold pieces.
3:14
Little did Beau know that this man only had like 4 hit points
3:17
left, but he went down without a fight.
3:20
Oh well, we have a new friend in Rorick, I think that was his
3:23
name. Up next was Bond and Abe against
3:25
a High Elf and a bullywug mage. The bullywug mage came out hard
3:29
with a Vitriolic Sphere, but Abe and Bond were able to take only
3:33
half damage and negate the longer term effects, which was
3:36
very clutch. Bond casted his new spell Spirit
3:39
Guardians with Summon Drow Spirits to beat upon his
3:42
enemies. This did so much fucking damage.
3:46
The bullywug hurt Abe heavily and this actually caused Abe to
3:50
lock the fuck in and he knocked out the bullywug easily with
3:54
some quick blows and the bullywug laid flattened on the
3:57
ground after a devastating smush.
3:59
Abe also then shouted to Gumbo lobotomy Bo's alter ego, which
4:04
caused Vedu to ask Bunty how Abe knew Gumbo and ask where Bo was.
4:08
Then Bon moved his spirits to the High Elf who became trapped
4:11
in a corner. She attempted to polymorph him
4:14
into a golden retriever but Bonn was too wise.
4:17
The guardians and Bonn ended up knocking her out and that's
4:20
where we are now. So Bonn and Abe, you guys are in
4:24
this cage right now after winning your battle.
4:27
She tried to morph me into a golden retriever because I got
4:30
that dog in me. Bark for a bark for a bond.
4:35
And. Then I walk up to you and I and
4:38
I and I'm going to clasp your arm.
4:41
I clasp your arm back. I'm going to, I'm going to be in
4:44
the stands and I'm going to be like clapping and making a
4:46
really big deal about how I just won a lot of money off these
4:49
guys, but I don't know who they are.
4:51
It's like, oh, these guys, they're, they're really
4:53
something special out there. You know, they, they, they're,
4:56
they're like 2 peas in a pod. They're the way they
4:58
synchronized their attacks with each other.
5:02
Bo, give me your deception check.
5:04
I'm just saying this to a random orc next to me.
5:08
DC12. OK yeah I rolled an 8 on the die
5:11
but luckily my deceptions insane so it's going to be a 17.
5:15
Whoa, very good. Yeah.
5:18
The orc next to you is like, oh, man, you should have told me.
5:22
I would. I would have bet on them too.
5:24
I bet on that little little frog guy.
5:27
He was cute, wasn't he? Sorry there buddy, better luck
5:30
next time. Yeah, yeah, you did a good job
5:33
in your fight. Do do you want to fight me?
5:35
All right, maybe some other day. I'm feeling, I still feel a
5:38
little bit smartened from my, my last fight, you know?
5:42
He taps you on the back and hands you a gold piece and goes.
5:47
You can get a beer on me. That was a really good fight.
5:50
I actually won money off of you, so pretty nice.
5:53
Hey, I'm glad to hear it. You know love to help.
5:56
Everyone loves gumbo lobotomy. Take the gold piece.
6:00
I'm going to look at you Bond and be like, I don't know what
6:03
was going on during the fight, but when when things got real, I
6:09
was able to to fight normally. I don't know if that's always
6:13
going to be the case though. I can't seem to shake the fear
6:16
like once and and as the adrenaline is kind of coming
6:18
down, you see me like my face gets visibly tired and and the
6:23
damage from the fight is is starting to feel apparent like
6:26
all throughout my body. I kind of take this in and I
6:29
don't really, I don't really have like an answer for you
6:31
right this second of what to do. So I'm just going to kind of be
6:34
in here to listen, going to pat you on the back.
6:38
And I'll say well, after after all that, maybe we should go get
6:42
Bunty. Oh, I think he's probably been
6:45
tap dancing. He's a little hot out, Yeah.
6:46
And. You, you're here, you had and
6:54
you guys get out of the cage right now and are you picking up
7:00
a gumbo lobotomy to go up to talk to Vedu on the balcony?
7:04
What's the plan with that? No, I'm, I'm, I'm going to just
7:08
kind of leave. I guess I'll, if I figure I can
7:10
get away with it, I'm going to try to shoot a message to Bon
7:15
and, and just say, you know, I'm going to pretend that I don't
7:19
know who you guys are. You should do the same.
7:21
You can just say that that Beau, you know, left after being
7:25
almost thrown into the sea because he was scared.
7:29
Sounds good. I we walk up to kind of like the
7:33
the upper deck level where everybody is crowded around the
7:37
cages and I try to kind of like work my way in towards they do
7:43
and glorp. Yeah, when Glorp sees you, he
7:46
kind of pushes everyone to the side and turns to you guys and
7:50
goes fight. Good.
7:52
Me when? Money glor like you and gives
7:57
you a Hardy pat on the back and vedu goes.
8:01
Get knocked back a little bit, just hits me so hard.
8:05
I'm like almost drip and stumble.
8:08
I'm exhausted from that fight. Yeah.
8:10
How many HP do you have? I'm I'm chilling.
8:13
I got 40 HP. Yeah, he was good.
8:15
He was just almost a dog. He.
8:16
Only does 38 damage, yeah. Thanks.
8:21
Thanks, Glow. Yeah, I appreciate it Glow.
8:24
Yeah, me, me like you too, but. You, you imitate Glorp speak.
8:29
Yeah, I was going to be like, I feel like that's condescending,
8:33
Bond. Do do do you think Glorp smart?
8:40
Yeah, yeah, of course, of course give.
8:42
Me, your deception, Jack and Glorp's going to give me
8:45
insight. God.
8:48
Oh, no, it's in that one, yeah. Heroic Inspo.
8:53
Totally. I I totally.
8:55
Yeah. Well, all right.
8:57
Well, I mean, you know, you look really, really good at other
9:01
things. Give me a persuasion, Jay.
9:07
I'm trying to figure out what Globe's going to do.
9:10
That's a nine. Glorp goes over to you and picks
9:14
you up, just picks you up over his head.
9:18
This giant Goliath man turns to Vedu and says Glorp go throw
9:23
man. OK, Do you just lay limp in his?
9:26
Arm No, no, no, don't, don't throw.
9:28
Wait, wait, wait. Don't throw, man.
9:31
Yeah, Vedu turns and goes please Glorp, don't do that right now,
9:35
glorp. Don't worry, we'll we'll throw
9:36
him out later if we need to listen.
9:38
This was his one strike. Remember his two friends each
9:42
had one strike and he didn't have any strikes, so this is his
9:45
first strike. So put him down and if he gets
9:47
another strike then we can throw him and his friends out right?
9:50
And instead of Glorp speaking up, Bunty goes.
9:53
Yeah, throw him out, but only after doing strikes and Vader
9:58
goes. This guy knows it.
10:00
Oh my God, you guys have such a complicated strike system up
10:03
here. I wasn't expecting this.
10:05
Telepathically, I'm going to talk to Bunty.
10:07
Be like you are in so much trouble when we get home, you
10:10
are in so much trouble. Out loud, Bunty goes.
10:14
Wow, I'm really glad that I was here during your guys's fight.
10:18
It seemed like me, Vedu and Glorb had a really good time and
10:21
you guys had a really good time and no one died or had any more
10:25
strikes because I'm a good boy and.
10:28
Then he makes direct eye contact with you and then does a little
10:31
tap dance and. And telepathically I say touché
10:38
touché does the. Person bang the gong for for
10:42
bond strike. Do they ring a gong for each
10:47
strike? They they rang one for us.
10:50
That's really. I do think that was probably
10:53
more to get everyone's attention though.
10:55
Bo probably. Oh oh, that's why I've been
10:58
hearing a gong every 5 minutes. So many strikes are being handed
11:02
out right now. But yeah, you guys are up there
11:05
with Glorp and Vaidu, Abe and Bond.
11:08
You each have one strike. Well, thank you.
11:10
Thank you Vedu again for not throwing Abe here out of the
11:15
arena, out of out of these fights.
11:18
This is Abe, by the way. Hi.
11:21
Hi. I know you've you've seen him
11:23
before, but like, he's a lovely person.
11:25
He's a good fighter. He sounds like he made go up
11:28
some good money. So we appreciate it.
11:30
Thank you so much. I kind of like half bow half
11:32
curtsy strangely with my cloak. I really like that actually.
11:38
That was really nice of you. Thank you, Abe.
11:40
Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah.
11:42
So what's up? What are you guys doing the rest
11:45
of the night, you know? Oh.
11:47
I whispered to you, Bon. Are you trying to post game with
11:50
them right now? What's?
11:55
We have an afterburn, no. What?
11:57
What's the move? So Vedu turns to you and goes.
12:02
Well, the fights are like kind of going to be like over very
12:06
soon. So like me and Glorp and the
12:09
rest of like my little gang we. Kind of just like.
12:13
Stay here overnight, like when everyone leaves we do some like
12:18
magic and stuff. And press the.
12:19
Digitation all the blood off the floor and then Glorp brings out
12:22
some like beds for us and we've kind of like made this like our
12:25
home base and stuff like that. It's like pretty cool.
12:29
I think probably we'll go have to check on our boats in the
12:32
morning, but there's like not much else to do.
12:34
You know, Emberhold is kind of like dead at night is what we've
12:38
noticed. Not much happens, you know,
12:39
after like 2:00 AM so. Cool, yeah.
12:43
Where are you staying? We're staying.
12:46
I forget the name of the place. We've got some friends who are
12:50
overlookers up top that we're staying with you.
12:54
You wouldn't know them. She just stares at.
12:57
You unblinking and goes. I know everyone.
13:01
Everyone. I mean, I kind of like
13:03
unofficially run this city now, so like.
13:07
Is there like a who who runs Emberhold?
13:09
Do do we know this? Like, is there a mayor?
13:11
A governor? You know that it is a very
13:14
merchant based city, so the there's no official leader of
13:20
the city. It's mostly like the Guild
13:22
masters who stay in the area or have their ships come.
13:26
Usually there's at least one Guild master in the area who
13:29
kind of runs most things. Besides that, they fall under
13:34
the Imperator's rule. So it's just kind of like a city
13:38
that has guards and stuff like that.
13:40
So it's like different guilds would maybe control different
13:43
sections of the city and like do financial things in that.
13:47
Way as long as like one Guild master is in the city, they're
13:51
kind of like the unofficial. So whoever the highest ranking
13:54
Guild master is is the one who has more control.
13:58
So if the great Guild master, the great merchant Guild master
14:02
Swan would be, he or she would be in charge.
14:05
And then it goes in order like Novarum Noctavalis, Savorum Rex,
14:10
and then Pharaoh Maleks at the bottom.
14:12
But usually one Guild master is always here.
14:16
You haven't seen any of them. You also found out the
14:19
information that Narex was replaced, the Great Guild was
14:24
kind of disbanded, and that Pharaoh Maleks and Savorum Rex
14:28
have kind of been bopped out of the city in terms of allowing to
14:32
trade here. Yeah, yeah.
14:34
I mean, you, you've really been running this place.
14:37
It must be quite the upgrade from the shade hold.
14:40
The shade hold was like kind of fun.
14:43
I met so many interesting people there.
14:47
I mean everyone there is crazy. Can you believe it?
14:50
Oh my God, there were like people who just like, like say
14:55
things and like, oh, repeat words and like people who are
14:59
crazy. Put a finger up like anyone,
15:03
anyone in particular. I kind of like, you know.
15:05
Oh my God, There's like a whole level of them of like crazy
15:09
people. There's like a crazy person
15:11
level. I obviously was not on that
15:13
level, but there were other people who were on that level
15:16
and they were just like crazy. Oh my God, there were so many.
15:20
Crazy stuff that happened in the Shade Hold city.
15:23
Yes, they do. Quick question, can I ask you a
15:26
question? Would that be OK?
15:28
I mean, yeah, sure, go for it. Did you see anyone that looked
15:31
like me that was repeating things kind of older, a little
15:35
bit older, maybe, maybe a little less, you know, well kept.
15:40
No, I wasn't on that level, Abe. I don't know who was on that
15:44
level. But but you heard things about
15:47
people there, right? Like, did anyone tell you
15:49
anything about someone like that maybe?
15:52
And I kind of look at Juban and I look back at her.
15:55
I mean, there were a lot of people.
15:57
There was probably like 200 people on that level.
16:00
That's like a lot of people. Yeah, I mean, and I look around
16:03
the room like, how many people are here roughly, Just roughly.
16:06
In the room right now in the in the fight, probably about 200
16:11
people. Yeah, yeah.
16:12
Like, like, like this. This is a big room.
16:13
Yeah. Yeah, I get it.
16:14
I get it. That's a lot of people.
16:15
That's a lot of people. I mean, it's, it's pretty, it's
16:17
pretty clear that they do here was not didn't spend any time on
16:23
the crazy level. So.
16:24
No, no, like, not at all in fact.
16:27
I was such. And why would you?
16:29
Citizen. No, no, no.
16:30
I we we were all such model citizens, which is why they let
16:33
us out, right? That's why they let the shade.
16:35
Hold was getting like kind of scary.
16:38
There were like these two people that would like, like kill
16:42
people in the night. Was that not the case when you
16:45
got there? No, I mean, like, not really.
16:49
There weren't just people jumping from rooftop to rooftop
16:51
killing people in the night, you know, like.
16:53
Like not employed by the not employed by the by the shade
16:56
hold were they? No, no, the shade hold, we
16:58
don't. The shade hold doesn't kill
16:59
people. We just lock them up and they're
17:01
just crazy. Let me get this straight, you
17:03
there were people jumping from roof to roof at night killing
17:08
people in the shade hold. Yeah, they were just like people
17:11
jumping from rooftop to roofop killing people.
17:12
It was pretty dangerous. And that's why I'm here now in
17:15
like a very safe place that I run.
17:17
Did you ever see these people? Like did you interact with them?
17:22
Yes. You are.
17:23
No. Why are it?
17:24
Just people killing people in the shade hole.
17:25
This is ridiculous. It's a prison.
17:28
It's a maximum security prison. Why?
17:29
Yes, I know, I know, I know, I know.
17:32
And she's so squawking. Squawk.
17:33
Squawk. She's getting like hyped up.
17:36
OK, I know. So I never interacted with them,
17:40
but like there were little like wanted posters around the shade
17:43
hold, which was like super funny because we're all like
17:45
criminals. But it was like wanted and they
17:48
called him like the executioners because they always wore like
17:51
little executioner, like little outfits and stuff like that.
17:54
It was kind of cute, but you couldn't really see their faces.
17:56
And I never got killed clearly, but like they would kill people.
18:02
Yeah, I mean, that's a fairpoint to bring up.
18:04
I've been killed so. Oh my God, that's how was death.
18:09
Not as bad as you'd think. OK, OK, maybe something to try
18:17
one day. Oh.
18:19
Man. All right.
18:19
Well, I think we'd better probably be off.
18:24
You know, it's getting pretty late, and I check my pocket
18:27
watch. What time is it?
18:29
It's probably about two A2 2:00 AM or so.
18:31
Yes, Bon, we should go one more question Baidu, if, if I can.
18:36
OK. When we were coming into the
18:39
city, we noticed like like they're just were more, more
18:45
scuffles or marks of scuffles around the entrance.
18:49
Do you know about that? Like is that something you or
18:52
your your merchant posse could could look into?
18:56
Oh, I've heard of the bandits. Yes, the bandits that are
18:59
outside the town. Unfortunately, since the Great
19:04
Merchant Guild has been disbanded, no one is paying for
19:07
the hired blades to defend from the bandits.
19:10
And I don't know, we took a vote.
19:13
And by that I mean I decided that it wasn't kind of like
19:15
worth it to to pay hired blades because that's money out of my
19:19
pocket. Got it.
19:21
OK. Why did they give you trouble?
19:23
Did they give you trouble? No, I mean, you saw us in the
19:27
ring. They couldn't give us trouble if
19:29
they tried. Yeah, that's what I thought.
19:31
So like, why are you complaining?
19:34
It's like, not a big deal. I wasn't complaining but sorry
19:38
if it came off that way and I kind of.
19:39
Cursed you that way again. Oh, I really do like that,
19:42
actually. So thank you, Abe.
19:44
All right, well, Bunty, why don't we get out of here?
19:50
Do I have to? I promise Abe is not going to
19:53
punish you tonight. What are you talking about,
19:55
Bart? I never, I never punished Bunty.
19:58
I never punished him. And I and I widened my eyes at
20:00
you. Yeah.
20:02
Yeah, yeah, Bunty. I mean, I think we should go
20:07
right look over at Abe. Yeah, Bunty, if you come back,
20:10
we can do the jello thing tonight.
20:12
Oh my God, Oh my God Vedu, you have to try this.
20:16
And then he briefly explains the jello thing and Vedu goes oh.
20:19
My, that sounds like a lot of fun because I have like a beak,
20:23
so like I feel like it'd be pretty easy.
20:24
To go through the jello and Bunty turns to her.
20:27
Wide eyed and he goes. You are a woman of many talents,
20:30
Vedu. Many talents.
20:33
Hey I've. War, my lady.
20:35
Andy, bounce towards you guys. Why couldn't he be like this
20:41
with with Janie? Only took him.
20:45
Like 1415 sessions. You know, actually, I think the
20:49
experience with Janie taught him to be more.
20:52
Like this is growth, this is growth.
20:54
While that is happening, downstairs is Gumbel Lobotomy,
20:58
who fresh off his win, is getting congratulations from a
21:02
bunch of people in the crowd and a very injured looking Rorick
21:07
comes up to you and starts talking to you.
21:11
Gumbo. That was a good fight.
21:13
That was a good fight. You.
21:14
I really thought with all, you know, all this armor on me, like
21:17
how, how are you going to stab me?
21:18
But you did it. You did it.
21:20
Yeah. No, you are.
21:21
It was, it was quite the Tuffle, you know.
21:25
Yeah, very impressed by you. Very impressed.
21:28
And I assume you give him his 500 gold pieces.
21:30
I I make it sly, but you know, I give it to him.
21:34
Can you describe what Rourke's face looks like without the
21:37
helmet? Well, Rourke's still wearing
21:39
the. Helmet.
21:40
Yeah, I don't. You only see his little like eye
21:45
slit through it. Very handsome from what you can
21:48
tell, but just like you can only see his eyes right now.
21:52
Are you more of an underground fighter or or do you fight in
21:57
the above ground gladiator pits? Little bit of both.
22:01
So like a lot of us obviously are people who are either
22:09
sponsored, right, or we someone kind of like owns us temporarily
22:15
until we make them enough money to, you know, get our freedom.
22:19
Sure, yeah. These fights, they pay well and
22:23
you know my sponsor and he, he points over to a wide dwarf man
22:27
with a gold tooth. My sponsor, his name is Jonkers,
22:32
you know, he loves this place. So, you know, Junkers just be
22:35
having a good time. I do a little fighting here and
22:38
there. He wasn't thrilled that I lost,
22:42
considering you looked so scrawny.
22:44
But the 500 gold pieces will will definitely ease him a
22:48
little off my back tonight. I'm not too far away from, you
22:52
know, getting my freedom. But yeah, you know, usually,
22:57
usually I give a little prayer to thesmira.
23:00
You know thesmira breaker of of chains, right?
23:04
Oh yeah, for for sure. I'm very familiar.
23:07
Yeah, well, Vedu actually took away all our Thesmira pins.
23:11
Like all of us gladiators who worship her, she was like very,
23:15
very strict about it. She won't let us outwardly
23:18
worship this Mira. I heard the Junkers was kind of
23:22
telling me this, but he said that there was like this new
23:24
rule for. Me.
23:25
What was Junkers saying? Well, Junkers was saying that
23:28
the Imperator just sent out a message to a lot of the big
23:31
cities that gladiators are encouraged and he puts this in
23:36
quotes to worship Astraxion for strength and Dravenel for glory
23:41
of bloodsport. Like worshipping this mirror is
23:43
seen as us trying to like get away from our gladiator
23:46
lifestyle and rebel, which honestly is what a lot of us are
23:50
doing. But you know, it was
23:54
interesting. Did you know the people who were
23:57
fighting up there like just now? I know one of them called out
24:01
for gumbo. I didn't know if you knew him.
24:03
Yeah, I Oh, no, I, I saw, I think they might have, they
24:06
might have bet on me in the previous, previous round.
24:09
Yeah for sure. I'm like so confused though like
24:12
why Vedu allowed like the drow guy to like have his cloak with
24:17
the giant this mirror symbol on it?
24:19
Huh, that's a really. That's a really good.
24:21
Point like she took away all of our like little pins and she let
24:25
him have his giant cloak like. Yeah, I'm just going to look
24:28
over at Bon and and Abe who? Are up on the balcony.
24:32
I guess he's still talking to they.
24:34
Yeah, that is, that is a really interesting and insightful
24:37
point. Roy, do you ever travel to other
24:40
cities? Is there any chance where I'm
24:42
going to see you around or anything like that?
24:44
You know, I don't think I'm going to be staying in Emberhold
24:46
too. Long.
24:46
Yeah, I mean very much so. I mean it depends on what like
24:50
Jonkers wants to do. He is very partial to IG
24:55
Novarum, so I don't know if I've fought in any of the other
24:59
empires. He looks off wistfully.
25:02
I'm actually from Salvorum, Rex. I haven't.
25:05
I haven't been home in a very long time.
25:08
Yeah. Yeah, well, I, I wish you, I
25:11
wish you the best of luck, Roric.
25:13
You know, if you, if you ever achieve your, your freedom and
25:16
you're, you're looking for what to do next, Why don't you look
25:20
up a group called the Monos and, and maybe they can help you out.
25:25
Yeah, that sounds like a really great idea.
25:27
I'll, I'll take note of it. Thank you, Gumbo.
25:30
You've been a a worthy opponent and honestly, a a breath of
25:34
fresh air as we have this conversation.
25:36
Most of the other gladiators are kind of Dicks and you're a good
25:40
guy. You're a really good guy.
25:43
Yeah, you. You too, Rory.
25:44
It was, it was nice to to catch up with you and, and not trade
25:48
blows, you know? Yeah.
25:49
Definitely. I'm going to, I'm going to kind
25:51
of clasp arms with him and like as I'm, as I'm close to his ear,
25:57
I'm going to, I'm going to say and keep keep praying to
26:00
Thesmira before your battles. Always.
26:03
I'm sorry, could you tell me the name of your sponsor one more
26:05
time? Junkers.
26:08
Yeah. OK.
26:08
Thank you. JONKERS, Jonkers.
26:14
That sounds about right. Thank you so much, Jonkers.
26:17
He's actually the 4th, Jonkers the 4th but.
26:20
Jonkers the fourth. Ah, I see.
26:22
You could also say Jonkers. Jonkers, Jonkers, Jonkers.
26:25
It takes him a second from all the brain damage that he's had,
26:28
but he wants yeah. Gumbo lobotomy.
26:33
Is there anyone else you wanted to look for in this crowd
26:38
before? Yeah, I am.
26:39
I'm keeping an eye out for the the man I saw before, the seven
26:43
foot tall guy with the eye glass.
26:46
Yes, yeah, he had the mechanical eye and the mechanical ears.
26:49
Give me a perception check right now and I'm going to roll for.
26:55
Him. That'll be a natural one.
26:57
That'll also be a natural one for me, so let's both re roll.
27:02
OK, Natural 3. You are scanning the crowd right
27:09
now and you would think spotting A7 foot.
27:12
Wait, actually, hold up, hold up.
27:14
It's actually a four with my perception bonus.
27:16
That did it. No, I'm kidding.
27:21
You think that spotting A7 foot tall man would be easy, but then
27:26
you remember you're in like a room full of like goliaths,
27:29
orcs. I mean yes, there of course are
27:30
gnomes and goblins and stuff like that, but there are so many
27:33
other large creatures here you're not able to to spot him
27:37
unfortunately. And as you're looking around,
27:40
you see that Bon, Abe and Bunty have been descending the
27:44
staircase. All right, I'm going to wave to
27:48
to Rorick and then I just walk towards the exit.
27:52
Great. So you guys spot these two
27:55
massive orc women blocking this heavy iron door in the far
28:00
corner. Swirling lazily around the base
28:02
of the door is that familiar purple mist identical to the
28:06
teleportation magic that actually brought you down here?
28:09
As you guys approach, the orc women look at you and it
28:13
actually takes two of them to open that iron door and it's
28:18
open and all you see is purple mist.
28:22
I look to to the gods and I'm like thank you, thank you so
28:26
much. I hope you have a lovely evening
28:29
And I step into the mist. Curtsy and bow a.
28:32
Classic through. And I assume there's a little
28:35
bit of space between US and bow. Oh, I, I, I was separate.
28:39
Yeah, yes. Just so that we're not seen
28:41
together. Yeah, I'll come in a little bit
28:43
after and also step through. Great.
28:46
So all four of you pop appear inside the parchment store that
28:51
you guys were previously in. The store owner looks at you
28:54
guys, looks very tired, just kind of beckons his head for you
28:59
guys to exit the store. Thank you, have a lovely evening
29:04
and I exit the store. Like curtsy and bow and I exit
29:08
the store and then when I get out I look at you bond and I say
29:12
subtlety. Subtlety and good positive
29:15
interactions with people, am I right?
29:17
I think I figured it out. Yeah, you you actually did
29:20
really well in there. I mean it, we mentioned the
29:23
shade old, we talked about your brother a little bit and like
29:27
honestly, I mean, maybe it's because she's a little fucking
29:30
and I like look both ways and I whisper it a little fucking
29:33
crazy, but to be completely he did really well.
29:37
She was definitely on that crazy floor.
29:39
Yeah. I have a feeling that most of
29:42
the floors are crazy, but probably different types are
29:44
crazy. Yeah.
29:46
Monty, are you are you good? Like was that stressful or were
29:50
you having fun? Little combination of both, you
29:54
know, we got the Taco Bell, we got the Pizza Hut, we got the
29:57
combination Taco Bell, Pizza Hut.
29:59
It was like. I don't know what that means,
30:02
but. What is?
30:03
What is that bunty? Taco Bell.
30:05
Is that something from from the void mommy?
30:08
Maybe. And he looks off into the sky.
30:13
But yeah, I was like. Hey, break that down.
30:15
Write that down. Yeah, I pull up my dreadle.
30:17
I, I was definitely scared at some points because like, like
30:22
Bond was casting a lot of magic down there to keep Bo up, but
30:26
like I had so much fun. I think like maybe I'm like a
30:30
natural performer at heart or something.
30:33
Do you think I was a performer in my past life?
30:36
Are there? Are there past lives?
30:37
He stares off into the distance. Wait, what do you mean?
30:43
What do you mean? What?
30:44
What do you mean? What do you mean?
30:46
You were just talking about something?
30:47
What do you mean? I don't know what do you mean.
30:51
Bunty. Whatever you did Bunty, it was
30:54
great. So thank you.
30:56
We we appreciate. It thank you.
30:57
I love you, Bun. Yeah, yeah, I love you too,
31:01
Bunty. And we kind of walk up the the
31:04
stairs towards the upper level of Ember Hold, again towards the
31:08
overlook. Maybe we like pause a little bit
31:12
to like, like after we're after we're out of the store, we'll
31:15
pause to kind of let. Catch up to us Bow catches up
31:18
bow. Do you go back into bow form or
31:20
do you stay as gumbo? Lobotomy, I think you're.
31:22
Going to stay as gumbo lobotomy for a little bit.
31:24
Yeah, for sure. It's really scary going up the
31:28
Cliff at night like it is. It is pitch black.
31:31
The the the side of the Cliff is not well lit even remotely.
31:37
And you guys are kind of just clinging to a wall and kind of
31:41
just like shuffling your way up. What would usually take 15
31:45
minutes probably takes closer to 1/2 an hour to make sure you
31:47
guys don't misstep. Bunty is skipping the whole way
31:51
though. He's totally fine.
31:53
I'm going to, I'm going to blow a Nick's shod just to kind of
31:56
like guide our way a little bit. Yeah, yeah, that little bit of
31:59
light helps. As we're bumbling up, I'm like,
32:01
you know, This is why La Grande's village has it right?
32:03
Having local government really. Like there would be lighting on
32:07
this thing. There would be railings.
32:09
I know that leaving it up to Guild masters that are greedy.
32:12
I don't know about all that. Kind of just like grumbling as
32:15
we as we find our way up. So, So what, what?
32:20
How was the conversation with Vaidu?
32:22
And I look nervously at how Abe, I mean, you guys survived.
32:27
Yeah, I'm looking like I smile big and I'm like Bo or or gumbo
32:32
and I kind of look around. It went great.
32:37
And then I and I and I curtsy and bow and I'm like, I figured
32:40
it out. That's great.
32:42
That's all you have to do. That's great.
32:43
I look at the curtsy and bow, you know, I don't I, I think I
32:48
don't know if that would have gotten us out of the situation
32:50
before with, with the bar, but it seems if it works for for
32:54
Vaidu, then hey, yeah. I mean, they're her followers
32:57
like. That's that's a good point.
32:59
So far it's only worked. OK, so aren't.
33:03
Aren't you supposed to be a scientist?
33:06
You need duplicates and triplicates.
33:08
We need to increase the sample size of course.
33:10
However, at the moment there's no counterpoint.
33:13
Well, I don't know. No counterpoint.
33:16
I mean, have you seen how we've interacted in every other
33:18
scenario? I, you know, like me and Bo have
33:21
never. I don't think you've seen us
33:23
curtsy about once, but we have never.
33:25
We have navigated situations without it.
33:27
Yeah, yeah. There's certainly it's a complex
33:29
model, this, this positive interaction thing.
33:32
And maybe I've just, I've just found that like this super
33:35
variable, you know, the like the real fundamental aspect of it
33:40
that you guys, you know, you're bumbling through with your
33:42
words. Sure.
33:44
So I'm, I'm curious, Abe, like what happens if if you're
33:49
you're, you know, you're curtsying and bowing in a social
33:51
situation and somebody brings up that, I don't know, not that
33:56
this is true, but like Bunty's kind of small or something like
34:00
that along those lines. Are you going to keep curtsying?
34:03
Bunty's not small. He's not that small.
34:05
OK, so. No, I am.
34:07
I'm tiny and I got a little waste and I'm so cute.
34:11
I know, but are they saying it in like a derogatory way?
34:13
Because that's not acceptable. No, no, again, not true.
34:17
I was just bringing up an example of something that might
34:21
start to agitate you. I.
34:22
See what type of point you're trying to make.
34:24
Gumbo and noted and noted and and there's more yet to learn.
34:29
It is apparent, yeah. There was AII remembered
34:33
something. Oh, wait, never mind.
34:36
Sorry. I was going to tell you it was
34:37
something about monks, but I forgot that you're not actually
34:40
a monk. You know, you've said that
34:41
you're not, but it was like some interactions I had with oh, no,
34:45
it's you know, again, you're not you're not a monk.
34:48
But I, I was like, I was thinking back to my time with
34:51
Val and I remembered that there were there were these two monks
34:54
that we, that we ripped off at one point.
34:58
And it was a really interesting interaction because like, so
35:00
basically, you know, she would, she would like steal or like RIP
35:03
people off her stuff. And then I would come in
35:05
afterwards and I would like deal with them to be like, oh, this
35:08
person, they stole from you, you know, they also stole from me.
35:11
We should like work together. And then I would like steal more
35:15
stuff from it was bad stuff. But anyway, it was these, these
35:17
two monks and they were like travelling around and it was one
35:20
really old guy and one younger guy.
35:23
I'm going to kind of look at bond while I'm saying this and
35:25
I'm just going to wink. And then I'm going to go back to
35:27
the story and I'm going to say. And I noticed when I, when I
35:31
approached them, I, they were like having this discussion
35:35
about what happened to them. And I mentioned that it also
35:38
happened to me. And the younger guy he got, he
35:40
got like super pissed off and he started to like, you know, get
35:43
really heated and stuff. And then the, the older guy, he
35:47
just said this, this phrase and like instantly like it was like
35:51
a switch. And the younger guy, you know,
35:52
he was like obviously still pissed off, but he became much
35:55
more like cordial with me and stuff.
35:58
And I was it a. Spell.
36:00
I don't know, like, so he, he, the younger guy eventually like
36:03
excused himself for a little bit and like went off and sat on his
36:06
own. And I I asked the the old guy
36:10
what that was about. And he was like, he said it was
36:11
this, this, he called it like a a manta or or a a monster
36:18
mantra. A mantra.
36:19
Oh, maybe that was maybe that was it.
36:21
Yeah. I wink at Bond again.
36:25
And. I like the idea that you're
36:27
shuffling up this Cliff and giving like life lessons.
36:32
And, and so he, he explained that, you know, sometimes when
36:36
monks are younger, they have to learn to like control their
36:39
emotions or stuff, or else they might become victim to something
36:43
called like the call of the void.
36:45
And that the only way to like prepare yourself is if you you
36:49
meditate on this, this manta. Mantra for a little bit.
36:53
Mantra. Mantra.
36:54
Excuse me? Yeah, you meditate on this
36:56
mantra for a little bit and and like you're supposed to, you
36:59
know, like calm yourself. And if you, you also can share
37:02
that with like an elder, a trusted companion.
37:05
And if they see you letting your emotions take control, then they
37:08
can say it. And it's a reminder to like, you
37:12
know, rein it in. But that was just like some
37:16
weird memory I had about monks. And again, you're not a monk.
37:18
So. OK, so I don't think that would
37:20
like 1. And then I wink a bunch of bond.
37:23
Maybe. Yeah, monks are crazy, man.
37:26
I. Haven't met any monks and I
37:27
haven't been to a monastery yet, but like, and I'm kind of motion
37:30
at my spectral arms that aren't there right now.
37:33
I'm a monk. I'm a monk.
37:35
And then and then I go, well, so I know that's a super.
37:40
I know you said that's not a very relevant story, but it's
37:42
actually super relevant because we're figuring out how like you
37:45
were just making this point about how I get really
37:47
aggressive and stuff sometimes and I don't know, maybe that's,
37:51
maybe that's something I should do also.
37:53
That's technically, I hadn't thought about it.
37:55
Like, that's really smart. That's really smart, Abe.
37:57
And I'm technically a young, a young monk, much like that young
38:00
monk in that story that you that you met who was also having
38:04
anger issues. And it feels like maybe.
38:06
I If you say so. These are all your ideas, Abe?
38:09
Yeah. I mean, no, I mean no, no.
38:12
Right. Yeah, Yeah.
38:12
But he was a he was like a real monk and.
38:14
No, I am a monk. I am a monk I mean.
38:18
And I guess you guys are more similar than I gave it credit
38:20
for initially. I mean, like, I'm not like a
38:21
monk monk, like I don't have like a monastery or like an
38:24
order, but like good. Good idea.
38:27
Good idea. You know what the word.
38:28
Was that is a really good idea. Do you know what the No, I don't
38:31
think, but he the way he explained it is like the word
38:34
doesn't necessarily matter. You can like choose your own,
38:37
but it's just like kind of like a little, you know, safe word,
38:42
kind of like a bond on my on my, my chest.
38:45
Like like how Bond might have had with with leather daddy,
38:49
like with his, you know, and I wink at you, Bond I.
38:53
Have a safe. Word.
38:54
I don't know. I assumed you did.
38:55
Maybe you didn't, but the crazy guy I don't.
38:58
Think. I don't know.
39:00
I don't. Well, do you should maybe you
39:05
guys should have? AII have I have a suggestion?
39:08
OK, and this just came to me. And he stares up at the sky
39:12
again. Inhale the boundless sky.
39:16
Exhale the heavy stone. OK, you think I.
39:21
So that sounds like really creepy.
39:22
Yeah, like, I don't know how some like if if Abe was in a
39:26
situation where let's say he was about to get thrown out of a
39:29
ball and then he said to us, inhale the boundless sky,
39:35
exhale. Well, I think, I think it's more
39:38
like we say it to him and then he.
39:40
So maybe it's something like quicker?
39:42
Or I could say it in my head as well, like if if it's a concern
39:45
about saying it out loud. I like that though, Bunty.
39:48
You you don't have the greatest track record of saying things
39:52
inside your head. Yes.
39:54
So that's listen you. Are right, but that is usually
39:56
localized to writing things down.
39:58
So if I'm just thinking it, I can.
40:00
I mean, I often talk to Bunty in my head, you know?
40:03
Maybe, maybe sleep on it. What was the last bit, Monty?
40:08
Exhale the heavy stone. OK.
40:10
And, and was that like an original idea?
40:12
Do you think that that came from the void Mommy?
40:15
He he looks up at the sky. No, not mommy before.
40:25
I'm really tired. Or are we getting close to the
40:28
end? Please?
40:29
Can we go story time in bed please?
40:32
For the last little bit of our trek, we kind of fill bow in on
40:37
what they said about the shade hold.
40:39
And I'm just like, that's crazy. I saw those two people in my
40:42
vision. I didn't, I thought they were
40:44
like employed by the shade hold. I didn't, I thought it was like
40:47
some fucked up God situation. But sounds like there's a lot
40:50
more going on there than we initially realized.
40:53
Yeah, I mean when, when you did bring that up the first time,
40:56
like I, I had gone to see Alphonse once or twice, but like
41:02
very few times, but I didn't like I didn't see executioners,
41:06
but I assumed that maybe, maybe there were.
41:08
I thought maybe it was like a night time thing, like everybody
41:12
go to bed, the execution is out. Abe give me just like a Wisdom
41:18
check, just a straight wisdom check.
41:21
Straight 2 just going to be like A5.
41:25
OK, Yeah, you don't, you don't remember.
41:28
You were, you were never there at night.
41:30
You don't know if you there were signs or not.
41:31
You were pretty focused on Alphonse, so you weren't super
41:35
paying attention to your surroundings.
41:37
How was How was your drink with Rourke, Beau or gumbo?
41:42
It was it was good. Yeah.
41:43
Rourke's a nice guy. He he he told me something
41:46
interesting about Vaidu. Apparently she kind of outlawed
41:52
worship of Thesmira in Emberhold.
41:55
And not just that, but I guess the Imperator sent out a message
41:59
to like all gladiators to pray to Astraxion and Dravenel
42:07
instead of Thesmira. I I kind of stopped walking at
42:12
this and I quickly extinguish my my Knicks Shard and.
42:18
Oh, that's a good idea. I didn't even think about that.
42:21
I want to take a look around and do a perception check to see if
42:25
we're being followed. Everyone give me a perception
42:29
check right now. If you don't have dark vision,
42:32
do it with disadvantage. So I think that'd be human.
42:36
And Bo I guess, but give it with disadvantage.
42:41
It's A5 in total. It's an 11.
42:44
I quickly cast guidance on myself before taking a look
42:47
around this kind of like feeling of being cautious about my
42:53
religion sort of flooding back in just like reflex and I got a
42:59
27. Nice.
43:01
You spot around the corner a little goblin has been following
43:09
you in the shadows and he sees you see him and he runs back
43:16
towards the Cliff edge. You guys are now on the flat
43:18
part on the overlooker side and he runs back to the cliffs edge
43:22
and starts scrambling his way down.
43:24
Bo Bo and I don't see this right.
43:25
No. Does one of you guys have night
43:27
vision, I forget, or neither of you?
43:29
No. I I quickly tell you guys about
43:32
the goblin and I think Bo could you quickly run after and
43:38
stealth and take a look? I can try, but I think Abe is
43:41
faster than me. He's faster, but I think.
43:43
I can I can move. Let me, let me go, I.
43:46
Mean once he started running away, could we hear him?
43:49
Great question. No, he wasn't super close to you
43:53
guys. He was a couple of buildings
43:55
back hiding. He's very small, hiding behind
43:59
one of the buildings. He had peeked his head out right
44:01
as Bond spotted him, and he bolted.
44:04
I'm going to say trust me, I look at you, Bond and and I say
44:08
the mantra out loud as I start running towards the cliff's
44:12
edge. OK, just just be stealthy as
44:15
you, as you're shouting the mantra.
44:17
I say inhale. Well, I don't.
44:18
I don't shout it, but I say it. I say inhale the boundless sky,
44:22
exhale the heavy stone, because I know that coming up this and
44:25
going down this was really hard. So I'm going to need to be very
44:28
careful about moving down the stairs if I'm going to pursue
44:31
him, especially in the dark. You run 45 right and then double
44:39
it. Yep, 90.
44:40
Bonus action movement and action is 135 feet.
44:45
OK, great, you start running. Give me a dex check right now as
44:51
you're you're just you're just kind of like how are you getting
44:53
down there? Are you trying to follow the
44:55
roads because like there are roads or are you trying to like
44:57
climb down from road to Rd. because they're like switch back
45:01
so they keep. That's what I mean, like what
45:03
the distance is, if it's safe enough to try to like run to the
45:06
cliff's edge. And then if like there's a stair
45:09
maybe 5 or 10 feet below that edge, then kind of like slide
45:13
and use my hands to cushion the fall, like grab the edge and
45:16
then do that subsequently to try to skip the distance so I don't
45:19
have to like slow down and. Are you going to keep trying to
45:21
go from road to Rd. If it's the same Rd.
45:24
Like if it's that one path that we came down or are there
45:27
multiple roads? There are multiple roads.
45:30
That lead to different locations down there.
45:32
Yeah, yeah. So there's a bunch of switch
45:34
back roads, ladders, whatever. So you can kind of.
45:38
So actually, let's do this when you get to the cliff's edge,
45:41
first give me a perception check with disadvantage to spot him.
45:44
Otherwise you can't follow him and he will make stealth.
45:49
Hell yeah 24. OK, you spot him?
45:53
He's pretty far down. He is scrambling down the rocks
45:57
as fast as possible. Give me your dex check.
46:02
That is a 19. You see him pop back into the
46:05
Parchment store. Right as you get there, the door
46:08
slam shut. I'm not going to try to open the
46:11
door, but I know he's running from me.
46:13
I know he probably knew I was following him, but I wasn't
46:16
trying to make it super obvious if I got to his final location.
46:19
So I won't try to do that, but I see him going and I stop right
46:23
there. Absolutely.
46:24
Great, I assume you at this point make your way back up.
46:29
OK so the two of you have been waiting there for quite a few
46:33
minutes until Abe comes bounding up, super out of breath from
46:39
what just happened. He made his way down.
46:42
I mean, it took a few minutes between you and the goblin
46:44
getting down there, but yeah, you're you're you're tired as
46:47
fuck on your way back up and your legs are aching.
46:50
This whole time I've been on one HP but Oh my God.
46:55
So I I I did not look good. That's me.
46:57
You look even more. Tired.
46:58
So it's so. Weird.
46:59
Avoid mommy. Christ the sisters, I.
47:01
Kind of like bend over, hands on my thighs, like really
47:04
breathing. One second and I put my finger
47:07
up. The goblin came from the
47:10
parchment store. I was wondering why Vady was
47:16
asking where we were staying. We need to like take some back
47:20
roads to get back to where like we, we cannot take the Main
47:23
Street anymore. Do you guys want to give me
47:25
stealth checks? Yeah, yeah.
47:27
Also on maybe you want to take the cloak off.
47:30
Yeah. Yeah, of course, of course.
47:32
I I remove the cloak I I just turn it around to the part that
47:38
doesn't have the symbol on it. It's just a nice blue cloak now.
47:41
And I keep my pocket watch closed in my hand.
47:46
Great, everyone give me stealth checks and you can do it with
47:50
advantage in the night. A natural 20 for me.
47:56
Brilliant. 13. 3020. You guys let me see what Bunty
48:01
gets you guys make your way back to GAIL Songs.
48:07
As far as you can tell, no one has been following you.
48:09
I'll keep the perception check that Bon had as he looked
48:12
around. So as far as you know, no one
48:15
has followed you back to Gayle Songs.
48:18
I think we'll also be safe in Gayle songs because of the the
48:22
painting and the magic there. Good.
48:25
Point. So it's, I mean an extra level
48:28
of protection that they at least don't know where we are yet.
48:32
But who's Who's they? The owners of the club, the
48:36
people who seem to be running the city, you know?
48:40
They do like I wonder if they were told about us before we got
48:44
here or did it become something after they met us?
48:49
You know like did did they send the goblin after us after they
48:53
met you Bonn? Or was this like a planned
48:55
thing? Well, they certainly know that.
48:57
I mean, Bonn was wearing articles of Fesmira, Yeah.
49:03
So they know that he's a worshipper, and they didn't try
49:06
to stop him. So I don't think it's that
49:08
surprising that they would send somebody to follow three people
49:12
who seemed mysterious and just showed up.
49:14
Yeah, no, it's certainly plausible.
49:16
But your story from from the other day, Beau, about the
49:20
Domina letting you go, or at least putting you in the Agni
49:23
arena. That brings up something else
49:25
that I I forgot to mention to you guys.
49:27
Somebody saw me. What do you in the Gladiator or
49:32
in the Underground? Fights.
49:34
So at this point I'm going to say you guys are in one of your
49:36
bedrooms just so that we're in GAIL songs right now.
49:39
You guys have doffed your armor. Put on your matching pyjamas
49:43
drum. That's true.
49:46
Yeah. I like, I think saw me as in
49:49
like saw through the the cap of disguise.
49:54
Maybe, maybe not, but he had these like lenses on his eye and
49:59
it see he he was like looking right at me and kind of like
50:02
gave me a smirk and and acknowledged me do.
50:06
You think he was one of Vedu's goons?
50:09
I wonder maybe I don't think so. Do you want to give me an
50:14
insight check bow? Oh, there it is.
50:18
It's a natural 20. Hell yeah.
50:21
This looks like a guy from the Domina.
50:25
This looks like someone who would be from Pharaoh Maleks for
50:28
sure. That was that was my
50:30
expectation, just with the. Augmentations.
50:33
Yeah, I think this was somebody from the Domina, so she is
50:38
keeping taps on me it seems like.
50:40
But he didn't. He didn't seem, he didn't seem
50:43
hostile. Yeah.
50:45
And like do do you think he was like he didn't engage you in any
50:49
way, So was he even there for you or was it do you maybe just
50:52
happenstance? And I know it's late and I look
50:55
at you guys and we can definitely talk about this more
50:58
in the morning, but. I don't know.
51:00
I guess we'll see if we if we see him again.
51:03
So at this point, it's very late for Beau and Abe.
51:08
You guys need your 8 hours of sleep to feel good in the
51:12
morning. Abe, that is very necessary for
51:14
you. At your one hit point, what do
51:17
people want to do before bed? There are readings, there are
51:21
drugs, there are other things. My three favorite activities I'm
51:27
going to I'm going to start playing the Banjo I.
51:30
Was going to do some drugs. Bo's doing the hardest.
51:35
I would like to do all three. Yeah.
51:38
I'm going to start playing the banjo a little bit to do the
51:42
musician feat, and I think every time that Bo does this it sounds
51:46
more and more like actual music. Nice.
51:49
Very cool. What type of what type of song
51:52
is Bo playing? What genre?
51:54
I mean, there are not many genres of music that banjo can
51:59
play other than like a country or bluegrass or that kind of
52:02
folky. I'm playing some Mumford and
52:05
Sons, that's what I'm doing. Incredible, I don't think we'll
52:08
get. The license for that, it's just,
52:12
it's just some sweet chords, you know, he's still trying to
52:15
figure things out, but I think he's starting to put fingers in
52:17
the right place. Nice.
52:19
Both starts playing at like a normal volume and I'm just like,
52:22
oh dude, it's like 2:00 AM man. You guys have?
52:27
Separate rooms. I go knock on Bo's door because
52:30
I can hear the banjo. I'm like, dude, I'm trying to
52:32
trance over here. Bo's room is in the middle of
52:35
yours. I'm yodeling this song that
52:38
Sandy sang in SpongeBob. I had just, I had just taken a
52:42
dose of dream salt and I'm kind of like starting to fade.
52:47
I'm like, Bo, it's so late, man. It's working its way into my
52:50
dream. Incredible.
52:53
So you take, you're taking a dose of dream salt.
52:56
Abe, what would you like to do? I'm going to read a bit of
53:00
Johnny's journal to Bunty, but I assume it won't be a super long
53:04
passage because he's he said he was quite tired because my and I
53:08
kind of read half heartedly and in a little monotonous without
53:12
my usual commentary or remarks in between because I actually
53:16
really want to try meditating before going to bed.
53:18
So all the talk about monks and and controlling your emotions
53:22
and the mantra itself. Definitely.
53:26
So you flip through a section of the journal where Johnny's
53:29
handwriting changes to graceful, sweeping loops.
53:33
He doesn't write much about his journey to rebellion, except how
53:37
seasick he got, but when he gets to the Empire, it's clear he is
53:41
in awe of rebellion. He fills the pages with your
53:45
favorite things, sketches of mechanical horses with brass
53:49
hearts and rudimentary airships that look like gliding sailing
53:53
vessels in the sky. He writes with wonder about a
53:56
world that doesn't smell like sulfur and Obsidian, but instead
54:00
seeks A collective path towards immortality through technology
54:04
and magic. However, the mood sours as they
54:08
reach the city of Premora for the wedding of Alaura's brother
54:12
Arjun Gailsong to a drow woman named Balsul Despond.
54:18
Johnny notes the tension in the GAIL Song family, who are quote
54:22
UN quote the first family of the smear worshippers, all
54:26
high-ranking clerics and paladins.
54:29
He also notices that all the GAIL Songs have bronze pocket
54:33
watches embedded in their hands, including Alara.
54:36
He deduces it must be for followers of this mirror only.
54:41
The night before the wedding, Johnny follows the sound of
54:44
raised voices. I stood in the shadow of the
54:47
great cathedral, the air smelling of Jasmine flowers,
54:50
listening to Ilara's voice crack with the sound I'd never heard.
54:54
Bitter, raw jealousy. She was shouting at Argan,
54:58
demanding to know why he would marry outside the Faith, But
55:00
Argan didn't shout back. He just looked at her with a
55:03
terrifying sort of pity. He told her that Balsool had
55:06
already started worshipping the Lady of Breath, and that this
55:09
mirror had already spoken to her.
55:11
Ilara's mom had gifted Balsool a pocket wash that was Ilara's
55:14
grandmother's when she was High Priestess.
55:17
I saw the light go out of Illara's eyes.
55:19
She has given every breath of her life to a goddess who has
55:21
never once whispered back. Yet this drow stranger hears the
55:24
divine call immediately. Worse yet, her own mother
55:28
believed that the next High Priestess would be Belsoul.
55:31
I kind of pause there. Illar confessed to me later that
55:34
she doesn't know who she is anymore, if she's in destined to
55:37
be High Priestess. It was that night, seeing her so
55:40
broken that I've made a choice. I have started to pray to the
55:44
Lady of Breath. If Alara needs a partner in her
55:46
faith to feel seen, I will become her paladin.
55:49
And as you end, Bunty is softly snoring away in bed.
55:55
Yeah, I'm a little torn right now because this entry is so
56:00
applicable to Bond in his recent things, but it'll have to wait
56:06
till the morning and we will go to the library, so I'll bring it
56:08
up to him first thing. So at that point I put the
56:12
journal down and I start to save my mantra.
56:15
Yeah, and as you read this, you also remember the painting from
56:20
the inn, which is a drow woman next to her halfling husband.
56:26
Yes. So you start praying and saying
56:29
your mantra before bed. Anything else that you want to
56:32
do before you doze off? I am trying really hard to think
56:38
about monks. I don't know what I'm supposed
56:39
to be thinking about, but I'm just like, I'm a monk.
56:43
Like I am a monk and I'm going to and I'm going to be 1 and and
56:46
that's the last thought I have before I fall asleep.
56:49
Incredible. We move on to something
56:52
happening 2 doors down. Bond tweaking.
56:56
So Bond, give me your D20 plus religion.
57:05
It's so hard for you to fail right now.
57:08
That is, A8 on the dice plus 9 is 17.
57:14
Incredible. 1738. Bon.
57:19
That's the name. What's up?
57:20
Hello. Bon As the dream salt takes
57:27
hold, your consciousness doesn't just drift, it violently snaps
57:32
away from your body and you pass out on the bed.
57:36
Bo, give me a Wisdom saving throw with disadvantage.
57:40
Or you can choose to fail this. Interesting.
57:45
What is, what is like, the feeling that's coming on feel
57:48
like? You feel this like tugging in
57:52
your mind right now. Huh.
57:56
Huh. Fuck it, I'll I'll let it
58:00
happen. OK Bo you had just finished
58:03
playing your banjo. You are laying in bed when this
58:08
tugging. I feel myself becoming a
58:10
musician. I feel it.
58:12
Is this what music feels like? And Bon and Bo, you feel like
58:21
your eyes and your mind kind of fuse into this memory together.
58:28
You are in the mind of someone and the host that you're in is
58:33
completely intoxicated, which makes your dream or memory or
58:37
something, whatever it is, make the walls tilt and you feel your
58:41
body move with these like heavy footsteps.
58:44
You feel super unwell and you also feel cold.
58:49
No blood runs through you. Right now you're standing in
58:53
this sprawling underground bunker filled with scattered
58:58
tools, humming coils, and shattered glass.
59:01
You look down at your arms and they are this complex masterwork
59:07
of orangey bronze and copper plating with exposed cogs, and
59:12
you are tightly gripping 1/2 empty bottle.
59:15
Anger surges through you. Standing across from you is
59:19
another mechanical automaton. He's shorter and slider than
59:24
you, but built from the exact same bronze steampunk
59:27
architecture, and he too is shaking with this pure rage.
59:32
You hear your own voice plead, slurred by the liquor but
59:36
fiercely defensive. You should be happy I saved you
59:40
from death, Corin. The slider augmented man steps
59:44
up, his voice cracking with betrayal as he shoves you.
59:48
It wasn't your choice to make. Look at me.
59:50
Look what you did to me. Blinded by drunken hurt and
59:54
stubborn pride, you lunge back, violently shoving him against
59:58
the glowing control console. Both of our parents, They died
1:00:02
for you, Corin. You better be fucking grateful
1:00:05
for everything this family has done for you.
1:00:09
In a blinding fury, Corin slams his hands into the bunker's
1:00:14
power grid. Corin No, no, You shout.
1:00:18
He doesn't know his own strength.
1:00:20
As the panel explodes, blinding you.
1:00:23
An impenetrable vault like metal door slams down 1 by 1, locking
1:00:29
you automatically from the outside.
1:00:32
The vision cuts to black and both Bon and Bo.
1:00:36
You snap back awake in the real world, this profound sense of
1:00:41
isolation clinging to your chest.
1:00:46
I said, hey, what's up? Oh no.
1:00:55
Was this a full 8 hours because. No, this was only for for you.
1:01:00
Bon Bo, you are super tired right now.
1:01:04
It's only been 4 hours for you? Back when in Bo's party days did
1:01:09
he ever just do Dreamsalt recreationally?
1:01:13
Great question. It's not the cheapest of drugs.
1:01:17
I would have assumed that the vagrants you hung out with
1:01:21
probably did something similar, but probably none that gave you
1:01:25
prophetic dreams. Sure.
1:01:27
I was just wondering if I like recognize kind of the feeling.
1:01:31
You do feel like you were just on drugs though, and you when
1:01:35
you and Bond kind of merged eyes and brains for like however long
1:01:40
it really was, you could kind of sense Bond with you, OK.
1:01:46
Interesting. And Abe and Bunty are snoring
1:01:49
away peacefully in the third room.
1:01:51
Me, me, Me, Me, Me, Me, Me, me. Honk you.
1:01:56
I'm gonna like, I know it's the middle of the night, but I also
1:01:58
know that Bond doesn't sleep as much, so I'm gonna maybe like
1:02:05
peek my head out, see if I I hear anything.
1:02:08
I mean I know I hear Bunty and Abe sleeping but see if Bond is
1:02:11
awake. Yeah, I I open the door as you
1:02:16
as you knock. Yeah, I just kind of tap my
1:02:18
finger very slightly. Hey I don't really weird thing
1:02:23
just happened to me. Dude I just had the crazy
1:02:25
stream. You're not going to believe
1:02:26
this. Oh yeah.
1:02:28
OK, well, interesting. What was it?
1:02:32
So I was like this. I was like an automaton and then
1:02:40
I I heard myself talking to my brother.
1:02:44
I think it was my. Brother.
1:02:45
And you were like and you were and you were drunk and and you
1:02:47
were yelling at him and he was yelling at you.
1:02:50
And then there was something about doors closing and electric
1:02:53
control system failing or something like that.
1:02:56
Oh my God, I I thought I might have sensed you, but I couldn't
1:03:00
tell if it was just because I was.
1:03:02
Oh, I mean, that was just a guess.
1:03:04
I wasn't sure if that's what. No, that happened to me too.
1:03:09
You know, I in my previous experiences with dream salt,
1:03:13
have they all all been in the present?
1:03:15
The dreams Avni? I mean, I I know the shade old
1:03:19
one was relatively present at the very least based on the
1:03:22
information we learned tonight. Yeah, as far as you know, they
1:03:25
have felt very present to you, but this one didn't.
1:03:30
I didn't know that Dream salt could go backwards, you know.
1:03:35
This didn't, I mean, unless somehow Corin is someone that's
1:03:40
currently walking this plane. Wake me up bitches, wake me up.
1:03:46
I think we should let Abe sleep. Yeah.
1:03:51
Let's let's reconvene in the morning and and share Abe what
1:03:55
we experienced. I just wanted to also tell you
1:03:58
before I went to sleep. Oh, that, that, that monk stuff
1:04:02
that I was selling Abe earlier, I don't know if you could tell
1:04:04
or not. It was pretty much all bullshit.
1:04:07
So that might only last us until we like, actually meet monks and
1:04:12
Abe starts asking them about what's going on.
1:04:15
OK, OK. I mean, there there was a guy
1:04:17
that we did RIP out like again, you know, truth like and lies
1:04:21
and. Stuff.
1:04:21
Yeah, I got you. I got you he.
1:04:22
Was he was like a priest and he was on his own and then it was
1:04:25
like a a chain link that was broken and he was a priest of
1:04:30
Astraxion that that we stole from.
1:04:33
OK. Yeah.
1:04:34
Well, good, good. Yeah, of course, because, you
1:04:37
know, or maybe it was drafted out of one of those two,
1:04:39
obviously. Not not this mirror, right?
1:04:42
Of course not. Yeah, OK.
1:04:44
All right. I mean, well, all right, you
1:04:46
probably need to go back to bed, but I'm actually really glad
1:04:49
that you woke up because I was just wondering, is, is there any
1:04:52
way you could, like, hook me up with like, quick disguise before
1:04:56
you go back to sleep? Just, you know, like I'm up for
1:04:59
the next 4 hours and like I didn't want to go to sleep with
1:05:03
the disguise on, but I kind of wanted to go grab something this
1:05:06
morning. Sure.
1:05:07
Yeah, that's what do you, what do you want?
1:05:10
What are you looking for? Can you just like, give me some,
1:05:16
you know, some scars on my face to sort of change the way it
1:05:18
looks and like we can tie up my hair.
1:05:21
And I don't know if you have like a hat in there or something
1:05:24
that's not a pirate hat. Yeah.
1:05:26
No, we can, we can figure some stuff out.
1:05:29
OK, Cool, cool. So I, I take out like the the
1:05:32
disguise kit and I start, you know, applying some makeup,
1:05:37
making changing Bond's facial appearance.
1:05:40
And then I don't know if I have like a hat, but I'm sure we have
1:05:43
like some piece of cloth that we can kind of create sort of a
1:05:46
wrapping out of. And yeah.
1:05:48
Alright, thanks. Thanks.
1:05:50
Sick. OK, so Beau, you head off to bed
1:05:55
and bond. What are you going to do with
1:05:58
your disguise now? Yeah, So I just wanted to go to
1:06:00
like the nearest kind of like fine shipping store, like like
1:06:05
wherever you buy boat supplies. I'm going to walk in.
1:06:09
I'm going to say hello there, chap.
1:06:16
I'm looking for a spyglass. OK.
1:06:20
Yeah, there's a bunch of them. You can buy one.
1:06:23
Yeah. Do you guys I look at their
1:06:26
spyglasses, what's the like price range on them?
1:06:29
Do they have like any nicer ones?
1:06:31
Probably like 2 to 5 gold pieces, yeah.
1:06:34
Would you, could you possibly engrave this one for me and I I
1:06:39
grabbed the five gold piece 1. Yeah, sure.
1:06:43
What would you like it to say? This man is like super tired.
1:06:46
It's like 6:00 AM. Well, it's a gift.
1:06:50
I was hoping that could you please say beauty is in the big
1:06:55
eye of the beholder? Yeah, sure.
1:07:00
And he just kind of. Sorry, the one the one big eye
1:07:04
please. You see him scratch out if he
1:07:09
already engraved or he puts a little carrot and writes one,
1:07:12
Yeah. Thank you, thank you so much.
1:07:16
Good chap all. Right.
1:07:19
Sounds good. OK.
1:07:22
All right. Bye bye.
1:07:24
I head back to the oh can you gift wrap this for me please?
1:07:30
You're his first place. Yeah, he just opened up and
1:07:35
you're waiting behind him. All right.
1:07:37
He puts it in a Do you want to like wrapped or like in a bag
1:07:40
with? Do you have like a little box?
1:07:42
Like a nicer box please. Yeah, OK.
1:07:47
He he like, rummages around. He finds a box.
1:07:50
He puts the spyglass in it, wraps it up.
1:07:53
Thank you. Would you like a bow?
1:07:55
A bow. No, Bow's not here right now.
1:07:58
Thank you though. No.
1:08:00
And I grabbed the bag. I leave the.
1:08:05
Professor X from that Wolverine movie.
1:08:09
I. Sounded so constipated.
1:08:13
I I walk back to the inn and I wait for everybody to wake up.
1:08:18
Great. It's the morning at this point
1:08:21
and you all wake up to the scent of Reen cooking something
1:08:26
downstairs in the bar Slash in Slash Tavern and I assume you
1:08:32
guys meet for breakfast. Yeah, I'm gonna bring the
1:08:35
specific the specific journal that I have and have the section
1:08:40
out as I walk down. Great.
1:08:42
All right, you guys grab a table.
1:08:44
There's a couple of other patrons who eat breakfast here
1:08:47
who have been staying at the inn.
1:08:49
And green comes up, serves you guys, doesn't even ask, just
1:08:53
serves you guys a plate of sausage, eggs and toast and
1:08:57
heads back behind the bar to get more food ready for others.
1:09:00
Yeah. Take a big bite.
1:09:02
I think we Abe, we me and Bonnie had a.
1:09:07
Show. Interesting experience.
1:09:09
One second, one second and I'm chewing and I lift the journal
1:09:14
up. Bond you should read this.
1:09:18
It's very relevant to your current situation.
1:09:22
GAIL Song and then I point at the I point at the painting, the
1:09:26
the two people here, Argin and Balsool.
1:09:31
Argin. Argin and Balsool.
1:09:35
OK. Pretty sure that's that's how
1:09:37
you're a GAIL song and I take another big bite and and Ilara
1:09:42
was having trouble talking to Thesmira like you.
1:09:47
Really. Yeah, but now you're talking to
1:09:49
her like balsul. Oh, also bronze pocket watches.
1:09:53
Bronze. It's all here.
1:09:54
It's all here. I didn't give you the section.
1:09:58
I I explained to him how the pocket watches were passed down
1:10:01
from like, this is actually generations old.
1:10:04
It's been in many hands before mine.
1:10:07
So the pocket watches, That makes sense.
1:10:08
Yeah. Yeah.
1:10:09
But balsa. Was like used as a yeah balsool
1:10:12
balsool. Huh.
1:10:14
I I thought you'd be more excited about this.
1:10:16
I don't. Know I don't know I well see I
1:10:18
am excited but I'm excited but but the problem is like I'm a
1:10:23
drow and is Balsool a drow? Is it was it said OK Yeah.
1:10:28
And like, it sounds like Gayle Song did not like Balsool.
1:10:33
And then so like, I'm trying to reckon where where I stand now,
1:10:40
you know, like on my ancestors. Country.
1:10:43
What do you mean? What do you mean GAIL Song
1:10:45
didn't like Balsu? Like High Priestess GAIL Songs
1:10:48
like Jealous of Balsu. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
1:10:51
We don't know Laura Alara. Was jealous.
1:10:54
We don't know that she was the. High Alara's Alara and Arjun's
1:10:58
mom liked Balsu and gave Balsu the former high priestesses
1:11:03
pocket watch and basically was like after I I'm no longer high
1:11:08
priestess. It'll pass to Balsool.
1:11:10
It will not pass to Alar. Oh, oh, OK, OK, sorry.
1:11:14
So I think this. Wow, wow dude, that's crazy.
1:11:21
This is how how the Gale. Songs.
1:11:24
Like introduce drow into their family line.
1:11:27
Like this is how you came to be. Huh.
1:11:31
Cause. So what you're saying is before
1:11:33
that there was kind of a drought?
1:11:36
I love that bow. I guess Balsal must have just
1:11:39
had a really strong connection to this mirror, yeah.
1:11:43
Interestingly, and kind of it, it was like an afterthought in
1:11:47
the journal, but love this from Jovinian.
1:11:50
Maybe he became a paladin of this mirror just to support his
1:11:53
woman dude, because she was struggling with this kind of
1:11:57
hard. Like, I don't know, that line
1:11:59
just went pretty hard. So yeah, it's not that important
1:12:02
to us, but still. Maybe maybe we can also look up
1:12:05
both souls name if we're if we're checking the library
1:12:08
later. Definitely.
1:12:09
We we also actually had something to share with you,
1:12:12
Abe. Yeah.
1:12:14
Guys, I know, I know. I'm working on it.
1:12:18
I I did the mantras before I went to sleep.
1:12:20
Oh I know, I know. You brought that story up from
1:12:24
that real encounter that happened like like in a
1:12:28
directed. Way.
1:12:28
Oh, yeah. I mean, that was just, that was
1:12:30
just a a memory that I had, yeah.
1:12:32
Yeah, no, I know. Like it was very.
1:12:34
Playful. I think any conclusion that was
1:12:36
a really that you've arrived at really cool.
1:12:38
Story. No, no, for sure.
1:12:40
And I'm working on it. I'm working on.
1:12:42
It anyway, so so we were we were somehow we.
1:12:48
I took some dream salt last night and somehow Beau was also
1:12:52
there with me. So we're wondering if maybe we
1:12:55
can capitalize this and get twice as much dream salt effects
1:13:00
out of just one dosage of Dream salt.
1:13:01
Did you guys? Take also together and not
1:13:03
invite me. Not on purpose, but kinda also
1:13:09
of secondary importance to getting the dream salt effect.
1:13:13
We we Corin was in the dream. Who's also in the journal, but.
1:13:18
And so we were, we were the person who's talking to Corin,
1:13:22
and it sounded like we were Cohen's brother, but we were,
1:13:25
both of us were automatons, like someone we know you like you
1:13:31
were. Elias and as I'm flipping
1:13:33
through the journal. Sorry, by by by automaton I
1:13:36
meant like like like 90%, you know, like 95.
1:13:40
We would. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1:13:41
Just like Beau, right? Yeah.
1:13:44
Avni, did my arms look like just brand new versions of my or
1:13:49
well, my current arm? Not my right arm, but my left
1:13:52
arm in the in the dream. Yeah, so you're thinking, you
1:13:56
think back to the dream and you're at breakfast and you look
1:14:00
at your arm. Seems pretty similar.
1:14:04
There any like distinctive features about your arm bow that
1:14:08
you could potentially tie to anything like do you have any
1:14:13
like particular patterns or shapes in the metal or does it?
1:14:18
I mean, it's not on my arm, but there is somewhere like
1:14:24
letterings that looks like it says bow, but it's so like faded
1:14:29
and that it it could have just said something completely
1:14:32
different. Who knows if it's even in the
1:14:34
language that we speak right now.
1:14:36
And so we explain the rest of the dream to you with like the
1:14:38
drinking and and the anger about family giving up their lives,
1:14:43
all that. So I kind of show you guys this
1:14:45
like relationship between Elias and Corin.
1:14:49
Be like it. That who you were must have been
1:14:51
Elias, Skylark and Charlie. Do you share that similarity
1:14:55
about the arms with us, or do you keep that to yourself?
1:14:58
I think I share it that OK. I mean, you guys have seen my
1:15:00
arms too, so I just imagined like as you know, someone who
1:15:04
has that arm, I would probably recognize it from a first person
1:15:09
perspective. Yeah, interesting.
1:15:12
I mean, didn't he mention trying to help Corin by preserving the
1:15:18
breath in bronze? Something like that?
1:15:22
Yeah. Huh.
1:15:24
And as you guys eat breakfast and ponder, that's where we're
1:15:29
going to end today's session. Yeah.
1:15:32
So many, so many big questions in this campaign.
1:15:36
So much to ponder on. Yeah, I know you guys were just
1:15:41
sitting there very quiet. For everyone who doesn't get to
1:15:43
see this on video, they have their thinking faces on.
1:15:47
They pretty much always have their thinking faces on, but
1:15:50
this was very, very intense. I mean, Charlie's stroking his
1:15:54
beard right now too. I've got I've got one eyebrow
1:16:00
fully cocked, the other one fully raised.
1:16:03
Trying so hard to connect the. Dots, yeah.
1:16:06
Well. There's so many dots.
1:16:09
Maybe. Maybe there'll be more answers
1:16:11
down the line, maybe at the library, maybe not.
1:16:15
We'll have to see. If you like the podcast, make
1:16:18
sure to follow and rate US on Spotify or Apple Music or join
1:16:22
us on our social media for updates, official art and more.
1:16:25
We are on Instagram at Smooth Critical podcast.
1:16:28
OK guys, I'll see you next time. Keep thinking bye.
1:16:33
Bye. My my head, I want.
1:16:37
To go. Back to my good old cat
1:16:40
politics. Yeah, don't.
1:16:42
You miss the days. Bring me back to my simple,
1:16:46
simple local elections.