Latest / Mom Wars / Tradwives and Baby Mamas

Transcript

Tradwives and Baby Mamas · Mom Wars

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: From the front lines of The Mom Wars. Here's Bethany
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Mandel and Kara Kennedy.
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: Hello, and welcome to our first maybe like official episode
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: of the Mom Wars. We had like a tester episode
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: last week that'll go live right.
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: So I am Bethany Mandel. You can tell because I'm
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: an American and I sound normal. And Ta Kennedy, who
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: sounds a lot smarter.
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: But I've heard from three people over the past week
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: that I sound American now.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: So no, I know. So it's funny because one thing
• 0:39
  Speaker 2: that I really find annoying about podcasts is when I
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: can't tell the people apart rich. Yeah, and so I
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: think this podcast will be everyone's favorite because they can
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: very easily tell us apart.
• 0:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And it's interesting.
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: I will let it.
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: So this is the Mom Wars, and we have a
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: lot to talk about today because yesterday was that on
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: Time's Day, and as well as the steak dinner and
• 1:05
  Speaker 3: the flowers and all of the nice lovey stuff, there
• 1:09
  Speaker 3: was immense drama online.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: I loved it. I loved it. So before we jump in,
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: just housekeeping if you don't subscribe to us already on
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: Apple Podcasts and Spotify and all those things. Presumably all
• 1:23
  Speaker 2: of that will be available. And also subscribe to our
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: substack and if you can be a paid subscriber, that
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: will help pay for our zoom so that we can
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: continue doing these wonderful podcasts for you. So Patriarchy Hannah
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: her name on Twitter is harmonized Grace. Kara is like clapping.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: She's so excited. I too, am created. So if we
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: didn't have this podcast, I would have called someone that
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: I don't know on Twitter and then like, can you
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: send me your phone numbers so we can talk about this?
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: So this is at least a healthier thing to do.
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: Did you know that much about her before this week?
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: No? I actually had no idea, And now I am obsessed.
• 2:04
  Speaker 3: I'm so deep in it that I was just telling
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: Nicol about it and he's like, I don't care, go
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: and talk about it.
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: On your podcat, So why don't you do that? And
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: then so I actually followed her but didn't. Okay, you
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: explain and then I'll jump in.
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: Okay, So what I have seen is that there is
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: an account called Patriarchy Hannah. She's like one of the
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: more famous kind of trad wives. She supposedly has a
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: husband and a lot of kids. I think town thirteen
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: fourteen kids? Wow? Okay. She lived in like a weird
• 2:38
  Speaker 3: constructed town called Tomtown. Is that right?
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: Tony Town?
• 2:43
  Speaker 3: Tonytown Okay, And was just like one of the more
• 2:49
  Speaker 3: online famous trad wives who would give advice and kind
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: of snippets of her very trad life to all of
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: her adoring followers.
• 3:00
  Speaker 2: So I followed her. This is going to be a
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: reoccurring theme in this podcast that I'm not very bright.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: I followed her, but I so she used to talk
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: about two things. So first of all, we found out
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: that she's actually a single thirty something year old woman
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: who lives with her parents in Arkansas, not a trid
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: wife of fourteen living with her husband. But she used
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: to talk about like child trafficking that she suffered as
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: as a child, and I thought that was like real.
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: Obviously this individual has like severe mental health problems because
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: she's like concocted this entire like if only she had
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: used her her imagination for good instead of evil, she
• 3:48
  Speaker 2: could have written the whole like trashy novel that I
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: would have founded my little library around the corner. But
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: instead she just did it all on Twitter, but so
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: she used to talk about that, and then she'd talked
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: about her tradline. I am not chronically online because I
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: have six children who I homeschool. And that was the
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: other thing too. She claims she homeschooled her fourteen children,
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: but she was always online, always doing Twitter spaces, and
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: I thought that she was satire. I didn't know that
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: she was like really actually pretending to be a tidwife
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: of fourteen because I was like, this is all so
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: complex and so absurd, it's not real. And I followed
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: her because I thought it was funny. I thought that
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: she was really funny because she talk about like being
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: submissive in everything, and I was like, but you're clearly
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: not like submissive, because like you're the most ballsy woman
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: on the internet who like goes at everyone. So I
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: just assumed she was satirical about child life.
• 4:49
  Speaker 3: How old did she claim to be?
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: How old? Yeah? I think pretty old. Because she said
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: that she had adult children. I also did some deep dives.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: She said that she had adult children who they lived
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: on their property and they built homes for them, and
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: that she had married adult children, and like the night
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: before the wedding, she would create she would gift to
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: the women like her future daughter in law's like cookbooks
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: and everything, which was like the stuff that I thought
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: was satirical because like no one, yeah is like yes,
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: the night before the wedding, that's about the mom, that's
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: about the groom's mom right here. So I thought it
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: was satirical. But in all seriousness, I think, I mean,
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: this was so much of why we wanted to start
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: this podcast was to push back against this trad stuff
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: on the right, and we talked about it last week.
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: But it's so perfect that one of the biggest trad
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: accounts and apparently there might be another one. Actually I
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: was looking into this right before we started recording, one
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: of the biggest trad accounts is actually a single child,
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: this woman living with her parents. Like it is perfection.
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: Yeah. So this kind of came to light because some
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: guy did a deep dive. Do you know who the
• 6:09
  Speaker 3: guy is?
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: Is he?
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: Like?
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: Well?
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: But I followed him okay, and.
• 6:12
  Speaker 3: Just basically did like reverse Google image surch of the
• 6:17
  Speaker 3: houses that she would post. And I think it may
• 6:21
  Speaker 3: be true that her like real identity is the person
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: that she would claim was her cousin or something.
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because I think she sent a gift to one
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: of her followers and it had her name on it.
• 6:41
  Speaker 3: So I just I just love the drama.
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: I love it. I love it too. She at first
• 6:47
  Speaker 2: denied it and was like pretending that there was like
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: a pastor that she had over to her house and
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: he like ate her snacks, and then he said, I
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: don't know this woman. I've never been to her home,
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: let alone eat in her snacks. And then she deleted
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: her Twitter account. But this woman has to have more
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: than one Twitter account. You will be back. But I mean,
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: I think it's I think it's representative of a few things. Also,
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: it's like this deep mental health crisis. Like I think
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: she was getting off on it, honestly, because so many
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: of her tweets, like sexually, I mean, so many of
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: her tweets were about like how her husband like she
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: would eat sonic and dumplings and then her husband would
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: carry her to bed, and you know, she was still thin,
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: but she would like talk about eating junk food all
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: the time, and like she was really deeply lonely, is
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: deeply really lonely, and like someone should do a wellness
• 7:41
  Speaker 2: check on her tonight.
• 7:43
  Speaker 3: It takes a lot of effort to go that farm. Like, yeah,
• 7:48
  Speaker 3: pretending that you have one kid is enough, but pretending
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: that you have fourteen kids and having to like because
• 7:55
  Speaker 3: she was posting photos of like supposedly her text with
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: her children. Yeah, and obviously had like a burna faux
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: or something that she was like texting back and forth.
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: You know, it's wild. I was I was joking with
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: I was joking with Seth that like what if what
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: if like my parents because my parents are dead, It's like,
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: what if my parents are really alive? Like what if
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: my whole life is a lie? And I've been lying
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: to and we don't really have six children, and I just, like,
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: you know, I rent kids, Like whenever I need to
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: go anywhere, I just rent kids. No, it's really wild.
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: I mean the Internet. It's funny because we had for
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: shabout dinner last night. We had internet friends over. Like
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: they're not internet friends anymore, we've met them for like
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: fifteen years. But Twitter is actually like a really cool
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: place where you can make lifelong friends, which I did,
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: Like all of my best friends are from Twitter. To
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: be totally honest with you.
• 8:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I messaged my husband on and that's how seriously.
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, tell that story. It's Valentine's stage.
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: Well, we had met once before for a lunch, and
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: but it was we were only together for like twenty
• 8:59
  Speaker 3: five minutes, and he was actually kind of rude to me,
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: of course, of course. And then like a month later
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: on Christmas Eve if I messaged him and was like, Hi,
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: I miss you, and I think he was like, who
• 9:11
  Speaker 3: are you? I don't even like I barely even remember
• 9:13
  Speaker 3: you from the lunch I love it.
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: Do you remember the first time I messaged you about
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: how much I loved you because your reels coverage in
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: the spectrum?
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: Yes?
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: Too, Yes, it was, and it was so thirsty. This
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: was like two or three years ago. Yeah, you were pregnant.
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: You were still pregnant with someone, Yeah, the last one.
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: Oh really, Yeah, that's so funny. Yeah, I mean Seth
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: and I've been together for so long. I convinced him
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: to open a Twitter because he wanted to, like, you know,
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: have a career and everything. I was like, Twitter is
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: or you should do it, and I was right and.
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: You were right.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah I was right.
• 9:48
  Speaker 3: But yeah, the famous power Twister caple.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, which, like, it's funny because we've been together for
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: so long that it was like back when we were
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: absolutely nothing and nobody together.
• 9:59
  Speaker 3: Apparently like you two are like written up in magazine pieces.
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: Sometimes, yeah, we rent kids to come for the photographers
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: and for the like reporters when they come to our house,
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: we like borrow some kids. We're like, hey, pretend you're ours. Yeah, yeah,
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: but no, I'm just I'm I'm so fascinated by the
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: whole thing. And it's like I toggle between like deeply
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: sad for this woman because she's like created this whole
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: life that she clearly honestly probably wants, but then also
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: like anger because she would be prescriptive and you know,
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: talk to people like this is how you have a
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: happy marriage, and it's like, I'm you're just like this
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: single kind of fat woman living in Arkansas in your
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: mom's house.
• 10:47
  Speaker 4: Well, the thing you can you can question how much
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: people should be influenced by social media, but the truth
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: is the people all influenced.
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: By social media. Like when I was writing the piece
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: on like child free influences, like you could just say, oh, well,
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: why don't you just not follow them? But yeah, people do,
• 11:09
  Speaker 3: And it like transpired deeper into the reporting that I
• 11:13
  Speaker 3: was doing that like people will get in sterilized because
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: of what they were in on these accounts, So like,
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: it really does impact both day to day lives.
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: Hillary Crowder, who is like one of my favorite people
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: on the internet and I also like her, though we've
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: never met in real life. She so she has, you know,
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: had some experience with the toxicity of of trad culture
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: in person. Her last name is Crowder. I will let
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: folks just google from there if they don't know the connection.
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: But she tweeted something that I thought was really profound,
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: and I want to have her on to talk about
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: the toxicity of trad culture. I don't know if she
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: would come on, but she said, I'm not piling on
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: for the sake of piling on. I don't think people
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: understand how many women may have made serious life choices
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: based off of a fake account advocating for a type
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: of marriage that doesn't exist. A dominant, controlling man who
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: decides what you eat and listen to, a man you
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: can never say no to, but is also loving and
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: makes all of the right, perfect decisions for you so
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: you can live in your perfect feminine energy. I think
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: very likely there are women that entered into or stayed
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: in abusive situations because of the lie that she peddled
• 12:25
  Speaker 2: and how she claimed it worked for her, it is
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: understandable to think that maybe if I submit more to abuse,
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: not knowing its abuse, this relationship will work. She's like
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: one of the best voices about the dangers of this
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: ideology on the right, and I think that she's right.
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: And I wonder, I wonder how many of these trad
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: accounts are just monetized. I mean, I think their pornography. Honestly,
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: I think the it's performative. Yes, yeah, I think that
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: the problem.
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: Is with trad stuff and the kind of of belief
• 13:01
  Speaker 3: that these women have is the we should return to
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: the nineteen fifties and like the happy nuclear family and
• 13:08
  Speaker 3: like it just isn't true. People weren't happy. There was
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: a reason that, like women needed to be liberated, and
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: there's a reason why the sixties happened.
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: I mean, so, I mean, I don't know how much
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: I agree with you actually on that. I think that
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: a lot of people were happy and a lot of
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: people weren't happy. But but I mean, I think about
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: my grandmother, who you know, was raising babies in the fifties.
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: My mom was born in nineteen fifty six and my
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: grandmother wasn't tread like she was, you know, a stay
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: at home mom, and then she became I think a
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: secretary or something. But like my grandmother had my grandfather
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: buy the balls. I know it because I saw it,
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: and I just I this this culture of women submitting
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: to men. I'm Jewish, Like I'm not part of this
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: like Christian you know world that is more common, and
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: like Jowish women, you know, have a reputation for a reason,
• 14:04
  Speaker 2: like stereotypes are real. But I don't think there's ever
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: been a time where women just like completely happily submitted
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: to men like they need us, they need us to
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: like tell them what to wear and what to do
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: and what to eat like if anything, I think that
• 14:22
  Speaker 2: in a lot of relationships, it's the other way around
• 14:25
  Speaker 2: that men are submitting a lot of their personal agency
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: to women because it's they like it and it's easier.
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: They submitted to their mother when they told them what
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: to wear and what we're having for dinner, and now
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: I don't know it.
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: Just wants the new Ali Wong special? Do you like
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: Ali Wong?
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: I've seen I've seen a series of her where she
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: was pregnant like one of her specials.
• 14:47
  Speaker 3: So she just did her latest special and it's after
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: her divorce, and oh it's so funny. She talks about
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: how like when she's dating now, she wants a guy
• 14:59
  Speaker 3: that has all been married because he's been like pre broken,
• 15:03
  Speaker 3: because she doesn't want to be the one, like she
• 15:05
  Speaker 3: doesn't want to be like the uncool girlfriend that's like
• 15:07
  Speaker 3: telling him what to do, telling him to beg his
• 15:09
  Speaker 3: socks about the well, she wants somebody that has been
• 15:11
  Speaker 3: like broken down by a ten year plus marriage too,
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: broken in. Yeah, exactly.
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: My My husband was broken in because he had two sisters,
• 15:20
  Speaker 2: has two sisters and so like you know, he was
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: used to feminine energy.
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, her husband was pretty much I was slowly breaking
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: them in and then when a baby, and then just
• 15:31
  Speaker 3: straight away it was like he would walk into a
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: He actually said to me one day, like, I don't
• 15:36
  Speaker 3: know what happened to me. Now I walk into a
• 15:37
  Speaker 3: room and I see mess and I just have to
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: clean it. I've never found me that's my husband, that's.
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: Not my husband. But I've never had to ask him
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: to put the seat down in our entire.
• 15:47
  Speaker 3: Marriage toilet stay. Yeah, I guess I don't even think about.
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, now my sons have started lifting the seat, and
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: I'm like a psycho about it because I'm like, you
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: cannot leave my house while you while, until you're trained
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: not to do that. Yeah, I got I got your
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: dad pre trained, and I will not send you out
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: of the house until you're trained.
• 16:08
  Speaker 3: There's been a couple of times in the night way
• 16:10
  Speaker 3: I'll stumble to the tornat half a safe and because
• 16:15
  Speaker 3: the season.
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, you can't do that. You can't do that.
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: That's very important.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, it's February. What's the great thing about February?
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: That's right, it's short, twenty eight days or maybe twenty
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: nine once in a while, but it's short. Sometimes it's
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: cool depending on where you are in the middle of it.
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: Right in the middle of the month is split by
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: Valentine's Day, which is about love. Of course, Well, we
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: love for you to join Ricochet because for the price
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: of just a couple of chocolates, you can find your
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: way into a community that's waiting for you. That is
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: the sane center right civil conversation you've been looking for
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: all your days. Why argue with idiots on Facebook? Why
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: get aggravated by the things people say on Blue Sky
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: or threads. Well, you know you can if you want
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: angers up. The blood gets a good and hot and
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: romantically robust I'm sure, but maybe calm down with the
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: love and the pithy statements and the piquancy that you'll
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: find at ricochet dot com. Go there now, sign up.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: It's cheap and hey, March much longer month, same price.
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: What a deal.
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: Speaking of single motherhood, you were just talking about it
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: a second ago. Let's transition to our other thing that we.
• 17:37
  Speaker 3: Would so humped for this. I was just reading the
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: interview she did with the New York Post.
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: Me too. Yeah. So, Ashley Saint Clair, who is like
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: this conservative quote unquote, I contend that she might not
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: be conservative influencer, claimed on Twitter Friday or Saturda, and
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: it was on Shabbat. I don't know when it actually happened,
• 18:04
  Speaker 2: but she claimed on Twitter that she was the mother
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: of Elon Musk's thirteenth child, thirteen Lucky number thirteen. And
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: I didn't I don't know how much I believe it. Honestly,
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: he just tweeted through it and never addressed it. And
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: she she in her announcement she at the bottom put
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: like a crisis comm's contact, like a PR person. It
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: was like, I don't know what's going on here. But
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: then she did an interview with The New York Post
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: with John Levigne.
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure it's true. I mean, obviously I don't know,
• 18:41
  Speaker 3: but there has been tweets now unearthed from three or
• 18:48
  Speaker 3: four five years ago which she is trying to get
• 18:52
  Speaker 3: Elon's attention, and she's saying things like, oh, can somebody
• 18:55
  Speaker 3: get me in touch with him because I want to
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: marry him.
• 18:58
  Speaker 2: Oh right, I did see that. I thirsty tweet Elon Musk,
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: but it's just to like get him to follow me
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: because he's so I mean.
• 19:08
  Speaker 3: I kind of buy it. It's not really out of
• 19:11
  Speaker 3: the realm of possibility. And I think I.
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: Think that The New York Post would not have published
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: it had they not done diligence in fact checking it.
• 19:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean what I got from the article was
• 19:24
  Speaker 3: that if it isn't true, it's extremely sad. Well, it's
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: extremely sad either way, because like her for her five
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: month old baby has never left the house for a walk.
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: Wait I didn't see them, Yeah.
• 19:38
  Speaker 3: Because she's too scared of being like recognized and ambushed.
• 19:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah right, isn't that Isn't that crazy that? I mean,
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: it's it's been cold, so maybe it's too cold for
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: the baby to go, but you know they take take
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: a baby for a walk.
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no one, No one knows who you are actually, Sinclair.
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I actually hadn't heard of her before yesterday.
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: Again, I I think I had heard of her. I
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: didn't follow her, and I think a terrible Irish woman
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: because there's this saying like you only forget, you only
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: remember the slights, And I always make that joke that
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: I do always remember the slights. But I feel like
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: there was something that made me unfollow her in like
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: a fit of annoyance. I have underlying like dislike of
• 20:21
  Speaker 2: her that I can't quite remember why. But no, it's
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: really pathetic. I mean it sounds like it was a
• 20:28
  Speaker 2: business arrangement, like the way that she described it. It
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: sounds like like it was I mean, was this the
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: baby wasn't naturally conceived?
• 20:38
  Speaker 3: So I after reading this story, Nick and I did
• 20:42
  Speaker 3: like a deep diamonto Elon and none of his children
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: bow one with grimes called ex the one that's in
• 20:50
  Speaker 3: the White House all the time, were naturally conceived. They
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: were either IVF or sorryot.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: So, like, what's the fun of being a baby daddy
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: if you're an bumping and grinding?
• 21:01
  Speaker 3: Isn't that so crazy? Like it's it seems bizarre. I
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: mean obviously with this fertility issues like IVF is a
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: way to overcome that. But it doesn't seem like they
• 21:12
  Speaker 3: would be with like even his most kids, who are
• 21:17
  Speaker 3: like eighteen and however old.
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: If I were rich and wanted to set sow my seeds,
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: I'd have fun while I was doing it.
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah. But also I don't think this is his thirteenth child.
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: I think it's his fifteenth because Amberhood's kids what very
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: likely to be his.
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the front door, Yeah I didn't know that.
• 21:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah. So this was just after the Johnny Depp stuff
• 21:43
  Speaker 3: and she moved away and then she popped up like
• 21:46
  Speaker 3: six months later and was like, oh, I have two
• 21:48
  Speaker 3: children now, and everybody was like what.
• 21:51
  Speaker 2: I totally missed? Yeah, how fascinating.
• 21:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and you know he's like moving them all to
• 21:57
  Speaker 3: like a commune. I think it's intact, it's like a
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: big love. Yeah, there's like a there's like a piece
• 22:04
  Speaker 3: of land that a few of his baby Mamas Live on.
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: And that is Big Love. That's the whole premise of
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: the show Big Love.
• 22:13
  Speaker 3: Maybe he's a big fan of Big Love. I don't know.
• 22:16
  Speaker 3: So the interview with Ashley Sinclair, she says that she
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: hasn't had contact with Elon's family, particularly may Musk his mum,
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: but she has had some contact with the other mothers.
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: You know what's great, rock Rich, Yeah, I really like
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: being married. I read that New York Post piece about
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: how she spent the whole pregnancy alone, and like, there's
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: something deeply beautiful about your husband holding your hair when
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: you're pewking, Yeah, rubbing your back and getting you a
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: new pair of underwork because you sneezed. Yeah, don't want
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: to get up, but you need a new pair of
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: under right now. Yeah, And holding your hand when you're
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: in labor and being really frickin annoying, Yeah, when you're
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: in labor.
• 23:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: I can't imagine doing any of that without your husband.
• 23:16
  Speaker 3: Well, I would have been pregnant the same time with her,
• 23:18
  Speaker 3: at the same time as her, because yeah, five months old.
• 23:23
  Speaker 3: And you know what, when I first read the interview,
• 23:25
  Speaker 3: I was like, Oh, it seems like she wants a
• 23:28
  Speaker 3: lot of attention for somebody that's saying that she doesn't
• 23:30
  Speaker 3: want a lot of attention. But you know what, after
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: a couple of hours of thinking about it, like I
• 23:36
  Speaker 3: would have been pregnant the same time as her, I
• 23:38
  Speaker 3: had a baby the same time as her, and now
• 23:40
  Speaker 3: l five months postpass him. And if I did all
• 23:44
  Speaker 3: of that alone, I would be so angry and looking
• 23:48
  Speaker 3: for rentribution, whether I make a fool of myself in
• 23:52
  Speaker 3: the process, I would want to take him down, didn't.
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: I mean I think about like when our kids do
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: something cute, and Seth and I look at each other
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: and we're.
• 24:02
  Speaker 3: Like, oh my god, yeah.
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: No one loves your kid as much as you and
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: your husband do. Yeah, and no one is as enamored.
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: And it was funny because we had these guests last
• 24:14
  Speaker 2: night and Seth and I normally obviously don't have guests,
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: and the kids were being really cute and our guests
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: are like, yeah, that's cute, I guess yeah, and Seth
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: and I were like, no, but really, it's really really cute,
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: isn't it. And they were like not really kid people,
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: and they're like, yeah, I guess, so, yeah, that's kind
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: of cute. How they do that it's really loud in here,
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: and we're like, yeah, it was really loud in here.
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry.
• 24:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah, we were just before the podcast. Daphnely went to
• 24:40
  Speaker 3: see it, but at like seven pm. So we've just
• 24:42
  Speaker 3: been watching here on the baby monitor ever since. And no,
• 24:45
  Speaker 3: that was why.
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: That was why I didn't get a baby a video
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: baby monitor, by the way, because I know, yeah, I
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: knew would become a thing that like I couldn't stop.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: So I've never had a baby video baby monitor. I
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: have a baby monitor.
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: Okay, so we have to we have to talk about
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: what you Yeah, with six kids.
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: Do you want to shift into what I think will
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: become a running what is it called, like a running
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: gag on the path?
• 25:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah, like a Q and A. Because Acne has had
• 25:16
  Speaker 3: six children and I'm on my first, and I've noticed
• 25:19
  Speaker 3: that I do crazy things because she's my first baby
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: and still way less crazy than other people. I know,
• 25:28
  Speaker 3: I feel like I'm very chilled, but after six kids,
• 25:31
  Speaker 3: I think there becomes a different level of chill.
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So we were joking on because I called you
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: the other day two days ago yesterday. I don't even
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: know what day it is. Can you tell how tired.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: I'm I'm a beyond like six times while we've been
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: recording this that my my level of like not trying
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: was so low with my first that I joked when
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: I had and when I had one, the like, God,
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: God take care of my future children because I'm so
• 26:03
  Speaker 2: laid back with my first. So what was it? Oh,
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: there were you had a friend who was like weighing
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: waiting first.
• 26:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because apparently that's a thing, like crazy, does that seem?
• 26:14
  Speaker 3: So we didn't pay attention to reading anything because like
• 26:18
  Speaker 3: why there's no there's unless.
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: Your kid is said, unless your kid is sick like
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: that that they can understand, because like dehydration is you know,
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: you know, look at it.
• 26:28
  Speaker 3: We just wanted to keep it. They had like an
• 26:31
  Speaker 3: exile spreadsheet of how many diapers a day, how many
• 26:35
  Speaker 3: fluid ances a day?
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: So I don't know why I am so tired. This
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: is why, this is why people are miserable in parenting,
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: because they're spending so much mental energy doing this stuff
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: for no reason. Why why your child will cry if
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: they're hungry that I can promise you, and like you'll
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: notice if they haven't made a wet diaper. I mean
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: I breastfed, so I never knew how many ounces they
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: were consuming. But I had a baby, I had two
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: three babies. I think that I had to supplement with formula.
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: And it was clear because they were crying a lot.
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: I was and with my first baby that we had
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: to supplement with formula. It's my second kid, my oldest son.
• 27:24
  Speaker 2: He cried for like the first week of his life,
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: and we couldn't figure it out because I was still
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: nursing my other child, so I knew I had milk
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: and I was nursing him, and he just cried and
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: cried and cried and cried, and we brought him to
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: the pediatrician, and the pediatrician literally forced us to give
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: him formula. And I had, like I had, like a
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: seventeen month old who was still nursing and who had
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: never had formula, and so I was like no, no, no,
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: I was like I was crying about it, and like
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: the pediatrician literally forced us. He's like, I will not
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: let you leave here without giving him a bottle of formula.
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: And I was like, no, oh, I can't give my
• 28:01
  Speaker 2: baby formula. His virgin gut will be And we gave
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: him the formula and he immediately fell asleep and stopped
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: crying for the first time. Then I cried all over
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: again because I was like, oh my god, I've been
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: starving my baby for a week and I didn't know it.
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: And then it turned out that he had like a
• 28:21
  Speaker 2: lip tie and a tongue tie and that he wasn't
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: like nursing effectively, and so then we cut it and
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: then he was fine and he didn't need formula again.
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: But it was funny because I remember being mommy shamed
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: about it by someone and they will rename remain nameless,
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: but they said, i'll tell you after the pod. And
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: this individual saw me giving him formula when he was
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: like two or three weeks old, and she's like, well,
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: that's fine if you don't care about nursing, and I
• 28:49
  Speaker 2: was like, I'm still nursing a seventeen month old.
• 28:53
  Speaker 3: Wait. So this is the biggest cultural difference between British
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: an American pregnant For me, Well, I didn't have a
• 29:02
  Speaker 3: baby in Bresion, but I know a lot of friends
• 29:03
  Speaker 3: who had babies, and breastfeeding is like not a thing
• 29:09
  Speaker 3: that you do in the UK. What, Yeah, Like it's
• 29:13
  Speaker 3: I don't know anybody that has breast but my mom
• 29:16
  Speaker 3: prospered me for a month or two, but it was
• 29:18
  Speaker 3: a different time. All of my friends have multiple kids,
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: never breastbred. And then I came here and got pregnant
• 29:28
  Speaker 3: and everybody was like, oh, you're breastfeed of course, and
• 29:30
  Speaker 3: I was like, no, I think so we don't really
• 29:32
  Speaker 3: do that where I'm from, And.
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: That's the number one mommy worst thing.
• 29:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, and people, well, that's kind of why
• 29:38
  Speaker 3: I got into caring about anyone discause and pregnancy and
• 29:45
  Speaker 3: stuff is because everybody was so insane when I told
• 29:48
  Speaker 3: them that I was going to give my kid formula,
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: Like my midwife was like, oh, You're not even going
• 29:53
  Speaker 3: to try and I was like, no, I'm not. And yeah,
• 29:56
  Speaker 3: it's just it's such a huge difference. When I said
• 29:59
  Speaker 3: to my friends back at home, Oh my god, do
• 30:01
  Speaker 3: you want to see the reaction to people find it
• 30:05
  Speaker 3: out that I'm not going to give the baby the boob?
• 30:09
  Speaker 3: And they were like, oh, really, that's like a weird
• 30:11
  Speaker 3: thing to do. We think breastfeeding is weird. Yeah, I know,
• 30:15
  Speaker 3: it's so weird. Yeah, crazy.
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: So here I So I had six children. The first
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: kid I nursed until I was until she was three
• 30:25
  Speaker 2: and a half and I tandem nursed her and the
• 30:28
  Speaker 2: other kid for two years. So the second kid, I
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: nursed him for two years. The third kid hated nursing
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: and he started losing weight at like four months old
• 30:37
  Speaker 2: because he hated nursing, and so I started giving him
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: formula and he was like half and half formula breastfed
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: until he was a year old. My fourth and my
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: fifth kid loved the boob until they hit a year,
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: and then like they weaned themselves. It was so weird,
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: like right at a year, both port and five wean
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: themselves at a year. My sixth is two and he's
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: still nursing and loves it, like no sign of stopping.
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: And he's probably my last, so I'm like not in
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: a hurry to wet him.
• 31:06
  Speaker 3: What probably?
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean God only no, like my fifth was
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: also my last, you may have more. I mean, I'm
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: not gonna tempt fade. I don't. I'm not God, but
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: I tend intend him to be my last. But I've
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: said that twice already, so I'm not like I know
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: my fallibility. But so all of that to say, I've
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: been nursing for like eleven years pretty much NonStop, eleven
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: and a half. The only time I've ever been mommy
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: shamed in my entire life. And like, I nurse in public,
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: like no cover, Like I'm very modest, No one knows
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: I'm nursing, but I do. I nurse all the time
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: in public. The only time I've ever been mommy shamed
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: for how I'm feeding my baby is on a flight
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: with my third and I gave him formula because he
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: would only take the boob when he was too tired
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: to fight me. He like hated it. He thought it
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: was like I was assaulting him with my breast and
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: he was like, get that thing away from me. But
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: if he was really tired, he would submit. So I
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: would nurse him half the time. And so I was
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: on a flight with him and I started, I gave
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: him formula, and a woman like leered at me. And
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: this was a flight from Arizona to like New York,
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: New Jersey, and so it was like a pretty long
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: flight and it was pretty early in and the look
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: that she gave me and she I don't think she
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: said something, I don't remember, and I remember my response.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: I pulled out my boob, like whipped it out, and
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: it was like out, like, my breast was just there,
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: and I was like, I still have milk, would you
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: like me to would you like to see me try
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: to put it in his mouth? And she was like, oh,
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: so offended by my breast. I'm like, lady, you wanted
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: to talk about my boob, so yeah, let's talk about
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: my boob.
• 33:00
  Speaker 3: People had a lot of thoughts about your body parts
• 33:03
  Speaker 3: when you get pregnant. It's crazy.
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: And he got so I tried to nurse him and
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: he flipped out and I put it away and I
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: put a bottle in his mouth and he was like, yes,
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: this is the stuff. I love this stuff. And I
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: was like, and this do you understand? Not that you
• 33:21
  Speaker 2: were like deserved, like its explanation, but here you are. Well.
• 33:25
  Speaker 3: I hope she never did that again. But it's funny.
• 33:28
  Speaker 3: Throughout my pregnancy, everybody had so much to say about it,
• 33:31
  Speaker 3: and then as soon as I gave birth and started
• 33:33
  Speaker 3: feeding her form and nobody fucked with me because I
• 33:36
  Speaker 3: think they know that I would have just say gone
• 33:38
  Speaker 3: to town on them. But yeah, it's funny. Some people
• 33:42
  Speaker 3: love doing it. I know a few people who have
• 33:45
  Speaker 3: done it for like a very long time, not as
• 33:47
  Speaker 3: not eleven and a half years. I noticed that when
• 33:50
  Speaker 3: I was pregnant and I had a couple of friends
• 33:52
  Speaker 3: who were pregnant at the same time, that it just
• 33:53
  Speaker 3: made them so miserable and made them feel like very
• 33:56
  Speaker 3: resentful towards their husbands because their husbands couldn't help. And
• 34:00
  Speaker 3: I don't need a reason to be I'm a very
• 34:02
  Speaker 3: resentful person. I am, I am, I I'm working on it.
• 34:07
  Speaker 3: But I just knew that if there was a time that, like,
• 34:11
  Speaker 3: and Daphne turned out to be a pretty difficult baby.
• 34:14
  Speaker 3: So I think that if I was like so low
• 34:17
  Speaker 3: breastfeeding and Nick couldn't help, then I would be I
• 34:22
  Speaker 3: would be pissed.
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: You know.
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I liked it. It was hard at first with
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: some of them, especially with my first. Oh my god,
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: but I'm so stubborn that I was like, we will
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: make this work. And then it turned out to be
• 34:35
  Speaker 2: really easy, like to be able to like sleep in
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: bed with a newborn and be able to just be
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: like lift my shirt, nurse you, you go back to sleep.
• 34:43
  Speaker 2: The baby would never actually wake up.
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: Oh wait, hang on, that's another thing, because now like
• 34:50
  Speaker 3: first time other sixth time mother safe sleep, What do
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: you think about safe sleep.
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: Oh okay, this is this is where we get controversial.
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: So with my first I tried not to sleep, like
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: not to co sleep with her, and I did like
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: unsafe things trying not to co sleep with her, and
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: then I just embraced it with the rest of them.
• 35:10
  Speaker 2: So the babies sleep in my bed with me, not swaddled,
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: not no blanket on them, like and just with my arm. Yeah,
• 35:19
  Speaker 2: just me and sethieah. And then I just like shift
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: the baby on either side of me, depending on where
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: I'm nursing. Yeah, And they stay in our bed for
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: like the first three months and then we're out. I
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: am going to be very controversial for a moment. I'm
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: a little bit of a SIDS truther. What do you mean,
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: I let my baby sleep on their stomachs?
• 35:45
  Speaker 3: So you don't be so you do believe in SAIDs.
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: I think that like this, So okay, they say, like,
• 35:55
  Speaker 2: I don't think that a baby spontaneously combusts if they
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: sleep on their stomach. I think the reasoning behind SIDS
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: is that they don't get into a deep enough sleep
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: where something could happen if they have a genetic predisposition
• 36:08
  Speaker 2: to sites. But I think that that is short sighted
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: because I think that a genetic or a physical we
• 36:18
  Speaker 2: don't really know predisposition exists, and putting a baby on
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: their background their stomach doesn't necessarily protect them if they
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: have this predisposition. But as a result, we are depriving
• 36:33
  Speaker 2: the vast, fast, fast, fast, vast majority of children deep
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: sleep and sleep is very important for your brain development,
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: and babies need sleep and moms need sleep. It's safer
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: for it's good for baby and safer for mom, for
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: everyone to be better rested. And so I didn't let
• 36:55
  Speaker 2: my first or no, I think my second had really
• 36:58
  Speaker 2: bad reflux which turned out to be like food alergies,
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: but I didn't know it at the time. But my
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: first I didn't let her sleep on her stomach, and
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: then the rest of them I did. With the caveat
• 37:07
  Speaker 2: though that like this shouldn't have to be said, but
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: I know someone that's something really tragic happens, so I
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: will say it. Yeah, swaddle the child. You can't have
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: blankets on them, like, you know, don't be a demo.
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, Like I let I let my babies sleep
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: on their stomachs and everyone is happier for it.
• 37:28
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I definitely love to be swaddled up until like
• 37:31
  Speaker 3: I really couldn't anymore because she was starting to roll,
• 37:35
  Speaker 3: and then as soon as I stopped swaddling her, she's
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: on a stummoch like within a second of being so bad.
• 37:40
  Speaker 3: But like, I was thinking about this the other day
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: because there's been a couple of nights in a row
• 37:45
  Speaker 3: now where she gets her legs stuck outside the crib
• 37:48
  Speaker 3: because there's like the bar.
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's it, that happened.
• 37:52
  Speaker 3: I feel like a crib bump, you know. I feel like, yeah, fine,
• 37:57
  Speaker 3: it would stop her from getting stuck and scream and.
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: It's it's it's I've had a couple of kids do that,
• 38:04
  Speaker 2: and it's scary, like being able to like Jimmy that
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: out my.
• 38:07
  Speaker 3: Mom knows somebody that the baby got stuck in the
• 38:10
  Speaker 3: crib and the mom didn't realize for a while with
• 38:12
  Speaker 3: her legs out and dislocated some kind of.
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: I can totally see that happen. Yeah, yeah, I mean
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: I think like if the baby is not swaddled and
• 38:23
  Speaker 2: able to move themselves, like they're old enough that they're
• 38:26
  Speaker 2: able to move, I would crib bumper. Yeah, that's what
• 38:30
  Speaker 2: I would do.
• 38:30
  Speaker 3: I guess it's probably an age, but it's fine. Yeah,
• 38:36
  Speaker 3: you know, like the safe sleep sleep stuff really is.
• 38:40
  Speaker 3: It holds you, It grips you so much.
• 38:43
  Speaker 2: I mean it's it's a terrible fear. It's a real
• 38:46
  Speaker 2: I mean the outlet stuff like they really pray on
• 38:49
  Speaker 2: mother's ear about a.
• 38:50
  Speaker 3: Couple of people who could not physically go to sleep,
• 38:54
  Speaker 3: could not shut their eyes unless they had so that.
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: Was part of why I didn't do the monitor. Also
• 39:01
  Speaker 2: because I knew. I was like, I'm going to drive
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: myself crazy. I don't need to see her. I'm her
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: because I'm talking about my oldest Like I didn't need
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: to see her, and I knew I was going to
• 39:11
  Speaker 2: drive myself crazy, So why why do that?
• 39:14
  Speaker 3: I can connect to mine one hundred miles away, that's fine.
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: If I'm like ages and ages away, I can still
• 39:21
  Speaker 3: see her, and I'm like, I luck at her, and
• 39:23
  Speaker 3: I'm like, why did I? Because now I just want to.
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: Hold Yeah, I'm like that even with my eleven year
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: old when she goes to camp and now my nine
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: year old two because he went to camp for two
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: weeks last summer too, and they're both leaving me for
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: a whole month this summer. Oh my god, but I'm
• 39:38
  Speaker 2: a psycho like so the camp sometimes does like a
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: live feed of whenever they do like a big event
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: or something at camp, if they have like a singer
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: or a concert or whatever an activity. They don't do
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: it very often, but they do it like a couple
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: times this summer. And I'm sitting there the whole time
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: on the computer, like do I see her? Do I
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: see her? Do I see her? Do I see her?
• 39:59
  Speaker 2: And two summers ago she was there for two weeks
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: and she has like bright red hair, so she's very
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: easy to spot. But then last summer another redhead girl
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: was in her bunk and I hated that girl. I
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: was like, take your red hair and go somewhere else,
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: because my trick is now gone. And my son, my son,
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: I knew that this was the case. He was there
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: for two weeks last summer. He had a hat on
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: the whole summer and I knew. I was like, it's
• 40:27
  Speaker 2: because you can't find iryamakas. I put and I even
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: I emailed him because they have like a system where
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: you can email them at camp. And I was like,
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: yamakas are in the side pocket of your bag by
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: the way. I know that you've been wearing your hat
• 40:39
  Speaker 2: every single day, and I know why and this is
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: where reyamakas are. And he came home and I the
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: first thing, I was like, why are you still wearing
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: that disgusting hat? He's like, I couldn't find my yoma
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: goes and I was like, I know you got that email.
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: I know that you got that email, but I was
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: also a psycho. And in some of the pictures, my
• 40:56
  Speaker 2: daughter looked cold. So there's like a cat amp store,
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: and so I sent her a sweatshirt in the notes.
• 41:06
  Speaker 2: I was like, you look cold, here's a sweatshirt. And
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: she so you can email the kids, but they can't
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: email back, like they have to snail mail you. And
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: it was like four days before the end of camp,
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: so she didn't even bother. Yeah, And so she came
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: home and she's like, yes, I was cold, thank you,
• 41:22
  Speaker 2: thanks for being such a psychon.
• 41:24
  Speaker 3: Wait, how often did the boys have to wear their
• 41:26
  Speaker 3: yamakas like every day?
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, like all day, especially at camp. I'm not
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: like perfect about policing it, but like they have to
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: wear them at camp. Yeah, And he couldn't find his
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: yamaica all summer. Long and so I'll, I mean, it
• 41:40
  Speaker 2: was only try.
• 41:40
  Speaker 3: He wore a hat that's really key.
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so it was easy to spot him because he
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: had his dopey hat on all day.
• 41:47
  Speaker 3: That's so sweet.
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah all right, y'all. So I think that that covers
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: it because now I'm going to get canceled for my kids, Truther.
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: So until next time, please make sure you are following
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: us on Instagram and Twitter and subscribing to us on
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: podcast platforms but also on Subsec. Subsec is huge for us.
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: Until next week, I'm Bethany Mandel.
• 42:10
  Speaker 3: I'm Kara Kennedy.
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: Saddle Up Ricochet, Join the conversation