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Plagued was Anubis · The Fantasy Football War Council

• LOSER: Mortals gather round. The war drums echo across the fantasy realm. And the gods have convened once again. Welcome to another meeting of the Fantasy Football War Council. I'm Jonathan, your god of war. Standing beside me are the Brothers of Destruction, the Brothers Grim, Daniel and Mario. Council is in session. Week one recap. Me Mario: Shh. Daniel: Yeah. That's that's that's me in the guillante league, first week out. LOSER: I'm so sorry. I was watching it happen. It was just like That's me last year though. That was me last year. And I'm I I I missed waivers. Daniel: Yep. Yeah. Yeah. LOSER: because I we pushed pot all right, so we're recording now Wednesday night. We usually record Tuesday nights. I always do my waivers after the podcast. But Me Mario: Mm-hmm. LOSER: last night we had some children issues, children stayed up, children not feeling well, so They were in bed all night. I didn't get a chance to look at my waivers, move them around. I at least placed them Sunday, but I didn't do any organization. So I didn't get what I wanted at all. Daniel: Jeremiah Trotter. LOSER: Or Daniel: Mm-hmm. LOSER: thank you. Yep. Thank you. Thank you. Because he was who I wanted really bad. And I had I would Daniel: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. LOSER: have put Coker as number two and like Bryce would have been number three. And I probably Me Mario: Yep. LOSER: still would have got him. But like dude, still. Okay. So but I didn't do waivers in any other fucking league. Me Mario: You would have got one though. LOSER: Like whatsoever. I would have gotten one. I at least got one. And I got one. Like. So it's not a like devastating loss, but still it is pretty fucking devastating because It wasn't what I needed to replace. So this week I'm worried. Especially in the Chopped League, 'cause I didn't get anything. I didn't Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: get a damn thing in that league. So like I I see myself Daniel: Well LOSER: I'm not close, but I know I'm close. I know I'm close. Daniel: None of that team did anything, so I I feel for everybody that bid a lot on those waivers. So LOSER: They bid a fucking lot, dude. I loved the hey Mario, 350. Daniel: Three fifty. LOSER: You were 350. There were two 350 bids for Segwan Barkey, and he went for 351. Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: Hey, price is right. That guy fucking hit it with the 350. It's always the one, man. You gotta go the one dollar extra. Ooh, it really is. It's always that one dollar. yeah. Daniel: Yeah, yeah. Me Mario: He sure did. But I'm happy he got him. I'm happy he got him. Daniel: Yeah. Me Mario: Because I got I got two other players and I was like, for the next LOSER: Better budget. Me Mario: teams that come out, I'm gonna wanna bid. And if I'd bid all my fab in week one, I'd be pretty mad. I wasn't expecting to get all of them. LOSER: yeah. yeah, it did. Me Mario: I was I was like, someone's gonna bid more. I last year I think someone paid four hundred for week one for the f for the top running back. Yeah, for HN or something. And and I was like, LOSER: It was like four sixty eight, if I remember. Yeah. That shit was crazy. Me Mario: if that happens, cool. Whatever. If I get him for three fifty, I'm I'm good. Yeah. LOSER: Yeah, it was like a two hundred dollar bid that day. Yeah, no. That was a little too much. A little little rich for me. How can you spend so much of your budget week one? You can't, because you just gotta survive week one, it's and week two, and then you know, you can start picking up teams and pick from the bones and you know, there's still waivers who are Me Mario: Well n normally LOSER: free. Me Mario: Yeah. Exactly, Daniel: Three. Me Mario: exactly. What LOSER: Free free people don't think about that. It's the free things and they're the fucking hits. Yeah. Me Mario: Yeah. Yeah. I I changed out a Daniel: Mm. Me Mario: lot of my defense that way. I mean, yeah. LOSER: Smart. Very smart. Daniel: Yeah. I loved per perusing LOSER: Cause it's free. Daniel: the defense of scoring for the week of week one and looking at all of these players that I have traded to Mario going, yeah, they would have been the highest scoring in their position on my team. LOSER: Mm. Yeah. Yeah. Me Mario: Ha ha ha ha. LOSER: Isn't it nice when you give them away? we never even Daniel: Mm-hmm. LOSER: mentioned our week one trade. I had a trade before week one with Ananke's Tampala B D S We traded Tony Pollard for Daniel: Demetrius Knight. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. LOSER: Demetrius Knight, thank you. Demetrius Knight. I was I in my head I'm only picturing the picks and it was a five Daniel: yeah. LOSER: for a a five for a four, but if he tags him it goes down the pick gets better for me if he tags him. So he had a good game week one, and I'm thinking, You're Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: gonna tag the motherfucker, and I'm gonna get a better pick. And I'm thinking, I should have made it a two for a tag, 'cause like if he bat if he tagged him for a two, yeah, it should have been a two, so like. Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: It's always nice seeing somebody else do something else for somebody else's day. It's Chuma Hubbard all over again! my god, it just hitting me. It's just hitting me. It's Chuma Hubbard. Daniel: It'll be trotter all week all mu all year, yeah. Me Mario: Dude, and for Chuba this year. LOSER: I mean, that's my own fault. The waiver wire's my own fault. But trading away Knight, 'cause I he wanted Vankle. I could have gotten Van Ginkle and kept Knight. So Daniel: It's just Me Mario: They both did well to be fair. They Daniel: week one, we'll see how it goes. Me Mario: both did well to be fair. LOSER: Hey, week one is when you tilt. Tilt hard week one. That's usually when you fucking do Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: it the most. People start ditching players. Yeah, you gotta see that's where you watch the waiver drops because you're like, hey, you dropped so and so. Whoa, you dropped so and so? You're an idiot. I'll take him. Daniel: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. LOSER: His six point game week one. I'll take that. You know, he'll do better. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So the struggle is hard. Daniel: Yeah, yeah. Thank you for living through that so I didn't have to. Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: We all understand struggle is hard, right? So I'm over like, what's the meme? He's like pulling his hair out. Daniel: Yeah. Yeah. LOSER: And kind of love Jim Carrey stuff. So okay. let's say we got some Me Mario: How are you feeling about Close and Lovelands? LOSER: news. I am feeling shitty. God, you can see this is what you gotta mess up. Now we're we're not gonna get off my team. Four! Four of my top my first four draft picks were all fucking failures. Colston Loveland was a donut, right? And then I came back around with Sonny Styles, who Probably would have been there for two more rounds. And he fucked me good and hard. Daniel: Mm. LOSER: Trayvion Henderson was out. So he didn't even play. I mean, dude, my first four picks, like, I don't think I had one of them in. That was it. Me Mario: Trey Hendrickson did that to me too, man. I took him high and Daniel: He did. LOSER: Yeah, you did. Me Mario: nah man. LOSER: We all wowed at that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, well, I mean, like, Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: it's the bold takes we take and we're like, hey, this is my guy, you got a guy in your head, you think you're gonna go for something, or your guy was taking right before you, you're scrambling and you don't like the names on front of you, and then you kinda like So, Me Mario: yeah. LOSER: you know, there's more this That's how Travian Henderson taken, 'cause I didn't want Travian Henderson and I wish I would've looked a little deeper, 'cause yeah, I would've taken something else. Colston Loveland Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: could have been Kenneth Walker. Kenneth Walker, boom for my wife. Gotta love that shit. So yeah, you start over evaluating Me Mario: man. LOSER: the draft, and man. Stop. This is where you start like, okay, I could have done this, but I should have done this, and like, no. So let's move on. Let's go to the news before I have a I have to take a second Xanax tonight. Huh. Me Mario: Yeah. So I I know who you don't have on your team. Daniel: All right, some practice injuries. LOSER: Fuck you, Mario. Look what you're doing. Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: You're just over here with a carrying a big stick tonight. You just wanna mess Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: it up. I love it, dude. I love it. No, hey. Cheers to the sang that's that's gotta be a really tasty sangree. He's just fucking with the bear tonight. Daniel: Yeah. man. Me Mario: It was, it was. LOSER: It was, yeah. Fucking with the bear tonight. Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: All right. Well, we had a couple of practice injuries. Nico Collins injured his hamstring in practice and played through limited capacity before having to get an MRI. This will typically cost about three to six weeks. So all of you that drafted Nico Collins in the first or second round, he did well in the first week and now he's Nico Collins-y. LOSER: Yeah. Yeah. Me Mario: What? LOSER: That's gonna hurt. So Me Mario: Hopefully this means you have him through championship. Daniel: this one next one hurts me and LOSER: This another one hurts. Yeah, this one hurts here, man. Daniel: In a different league, but it still hurts. Yeah. LOSER: Yeah. And in different ways. 'Cause he did really well before he went out. Daniel: Yeah. Me Mario: Yeah, this one. Daniel: He did great. Me Mario: my gosh. And then talking about wide receivers doing well, Zay Flowers was awesome for his first showing out there. And afterwards people saw him in a boot. And they said it's precautionary. but we're keeping an eye on it. Ravens front office is fielding for other wide receivers now because Jacoby Lane, LOSER: Mm-hmm. Me Mario: who is showing to be their wide receiver too, fractured his wrist. So he's gonna be out. And Rashad Bateman, we're still waiting to see if he's gonna be suspended LOSER: Mm-hmm. Me Mario: for his arrest in June. what a beast of a team. But to see Daniel: Yeah, yeah. Me Mario: three receivers like this just evaporate. we'll see with Zay Flowers, but man King Derrick Henry is just a constant and we'll we'll look forward to him putting up a forty burger every freaking week if this is what it looks like in the receiving core. LOSER: Yeah, you can't stack the box on him 'cause he's gonna make you regret it. He's gonna run it run it right down your throat and it's gonna hurt. I mean Daniel: Mm-hmm. LOSER: you can stack the box on it, it's just gonna hurt. So yeah, I mean, good luck with that one. And it hurts even more as it gets closer to December. Me Mario: Well they they just have Hen Yeah, they just have Henry go one way, Lamar go the other. And you gotta f which one has the ball? okay. Dangerous either way. LOSER: Yeah. Yeah. Risky though. Worry about Lamar. Don't want him Daniel: Mm-hmm. LOSER: getting hurt. There's your money, so Alright, Chargers Daniel: Mm. LOSER: sign Marquez Valdez Scantling to a one year deal. I didn't grab the deeds to that one. I'm sorry. Me Mario: Speed. Daniel: Alright. Speed that will never touch the field. You there already have Trey Harris. Come on guys. LOSER: Yeah. Yeah. It says it's Me Mario: I know. LOSER: a one year deal for one point two six million dollars and it includes a hundred and eighty seven thousand a hundred and eighty seven and a half thousand guaranteed money. Me Mario: Okay. I heard a lot of good things about LOSER: Not bad. Me Mario: the Chargers offense and that Herbert was just straight up missing guys. but they were getting completely open. So he's still learning the very new Mike McD McDaniel system. And that means that by week four, If you're a Chargers fan or you have them on your fantasy league, just sit tight because i the analysts I was reading, they've got they had very, very positive things to say about Herbert and the other side. Yeah. Yes you are. LOSER: Let's let's hope so. I'm that guy in our league and I'm sitting on a lot of chargers and it really hurt. We'll get we'll get to that why I was so low. Yeah. Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: I got a trade for Herbert in my work league. That guy drafted three quarterbacks, so LOSER: wow. Daniel: Yeah, all right. two players got fines for wearing messages on their eye tape. Aziz El Shahir with a pro Palestinian message got fined for over eleven thousand dollars. And quarterback K Triel Clark wrote Glory be to God on his tape, and so the NFL made him write a six thousand six hundred and fifty one dollar check. I wonder if they get you know, more per space or words or phrase and how that works out. That's a that's Three sixes when you break down six thousand six hundred and fifty-one equals six. Wow, that's very interesting. I know everyone who puts a message on their tape gets fined, but someone in the NFL is a fucking troll. Yeah, yeah. I I agree Me Mario: Ha ha Daniel: with this message. LOSER: Yeah, the NFL is definitely troll for sure. Me Mario: Alright. LOSER: Mm. Me Mario: saw an interview with Emmett Smith and they were asking him 'cause they said that Derek Henry is climbing up on Emmett Smith's overall rushing total. And it looks like in two to three years Could be only two years, especially with the way the Ravens look right now. he could topple that record and be on top. And Emmett LOSER: Mm. Me Mario: Smith reminded the reporter, you know that I had all the records in high school and college too, right? And the one who broke all my records was Derrick Henry. So he's like, just give that LOSER: Mm-hmm. Me Mario: man some time. He he says, I believe he can do it, and I believe he will. LOSER: Yep. Yep. Absolutely. And it's man, what Amanda Roch run. That dude was something. Mm. Me Mario: Mm-hmm. LOSER: speaking cowboy news apparently, Michael Irvin bet the Cowboys will win a championship this year or he'll shave his head. I can't watch I can't wait to watch him shave his head. Daniel: I think it was make it to a championship. But still. LOSER: Yeah. Well Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: either way, he's gonna shave his fucking head, so Daniel: Shave his head Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: on air will be fun. His luscious locks, as he put it. LOSER: Yeah, that shit's gonna happen. Yeah, those they're going Me Mario: Yep. Ste Stephen A. Smith said, LOSER: bye bye. Me Mario: Will you let me do it? And he's like, Yeah, I will. So we'll see. Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: good. There and so Ste Steve Smith's gonna shave his fucking head. I love it. Awesome. He'll be talking shit 'cause he's good at talking shit too, so Yeah, all right. I like it. Me Mario: no Sass, not not the wide receiver. LOSER: No, I know. The the the Me Mario: Okay, yeah. LOSER: ESPN guy. I know you're talking about. Yeah. Me Mario: Yeah. Yeah. LOSER: I know he's he's a fucking shit talker. That the the ESPN guy is a shit talker. That dude can't shut his fucking mouth. Like the wide Me Mario: He sure is. Mm-hmm. I know. Daniel: There it is. LOSER: receiver who can't shut his fucking mouth. But that dude can back it up because he's got muscles to back that shit up. Where the Daniel: Hey. LOSER: announcer does not have muscles whatsoever. Me Mario: And stats. Mm-hmm. LOSER: So Me Mario: All right. Daniel: Alright, Me Mario: To Daniel. Daniel: another practice injury. Jordan Mason broke his thumb and needed surgery and will be placed on IR. Aaron Jones is once again Minnesota's RB one. LOSER: I've gotta upload. Yeah, see now that we're on here doing the here, I gotta put the sad music here 'cause I don't have it. I gotta bring it back. Yeah, man, too many injuries. But I mean it's week one, it's usually expected. Me Mario: Alright. here's another one. Lane Dickerson played injured in week one. So the Eagles have asked him to deal with his injuries stepping aside and let the backup come in. Backup did really well in his place. But we should see more from Saquon Barkley and more time to throw for Jalen Hurts. because he was just a downright liability in week one. And yeah, he backup looks stronger 'cause he's healthy. So yeah, we're that's that's a positive note for the Eagles if you have any Eagles players. LOSER: Mm-hmm. Nice. All right. Let's get this over with. Daniel: Ha ha. LOSER: Mmm. I can't believe I was the lowest damn score week one. That's just. Blows my mind. Daniel: That's never fun, especially week one. When you're like it's so anticipating and looking forward to your team and Me Mario: I was in Dynasty and that that hurt. LOSER: No. Daniel: then getting a hammer to the nuts week one is just awesome. LOSER: Yeah, I you know, the one okay thing though was A, all Lee wasn't getting the first waiver pick 'cause I was. And I was looking forward to Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: it all s all week long. Daniel: I d I know. I was gonna Me Mario: Mm-hmm. Daniel: mention that earlier, but I figured it was gonna come up at some point, so yeah. Yeah Yeah, yeah. LOSER: I I'm just no, I was I was really excited to have it and I really wanted to do something with it. And and and then and then and then I I yeah. Daniel: And then the children. LOSER: All I can say is like while I was holding the kids, Me Mario: Mm-hmm. LOSER: I was gonna talk to my wife and be like, Hey, I g I I wanted to bounce something off you and I wanted to say like a waiver pick and then she immediately was like, Don't mention any names because I may need someone and I'll take that person. And I'm like, Okay, good and that shut all the waiver talk down for the night. I'm gonna cry tonight. I don't know. Me Mario: Ha ha ha. LOSER: my god. How do you miss week one waivers? my god. Yeah, Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: I know. It's like the bright spot. So yeah, post-week one takes. Don't miss your fucking waivers. that's like take number one, I think. Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: Yeah. No, that's definitely a take number one. Don't miss your fucking waivers. we'll let you type those out and we can jump to those at the end. So, Daniel, take us away. First matchup. Daniel: Alright. we have the aforementioned matchup, Clague of Anubis versus LOSER: I I don't know what you're talking about. Daniel: Saving Ryan's Privates. so Saving Ryan's Privates takes this one 170.96 to 137.81. Handing Plague of Anubis the unfortunate distinction of being banished to Hades as the lowest scoring team of the week. Hopefully, you're just getting it out of your system. The difference was pretty clear at the top. Saving private Ryans got a monster performance from Josh Allen, who dropped who dropped 43.86 points. Followed by Chuba Hubbard with 25.2 points, which was a surprise. Bucky Irving with 19.4, and Cam Scatabou with 19.20. That's four players combining for more than 100 points and essentially putting the matchup out of reach. Those types of performances are exactly what fantasy managers are looking for from their core starters. Plague of Anubis LOSER: Absolutely. Daniel: did not did have. Some bright spots. Lad McConkey led the way with 18.7 points, and he might be injured. And while Andrew Van Ginkel added sixteen point eight five. Well, Sonny Styles scored. Yeah, that's right. LOSER: Irony of calling him a bright spot. Just saying. Daniel: That's right. It was just bright for the game, I guess. But LOSER: Yeah. Daniel: Sonny Styles added 13 points and Devin Bush contributed 12, giving Anubis a new A few solid individual performances. Unfortunately, there simply weren't enough of them. The bigger problem was the bottom of the starting lineup. Colston Loveland. Two targets, zero points. Well, Tony Pollard, the man you traded for, Just LOSER: yeah. Daniel: scored five point eight points. Jameson Williams had seven point five points. And the Chargers defense finished with six point five points. All four of those players equal less than the total of a timeshare running back that was on the other team. Well several starter parts LOSER: All its bench. Yeah. Daniel: yeah. When several starting spotts produce single digits, it's tough to survive the matchup. Against team getting forty plus from its quarterback. LOSER: What matcha? Daniel: Hm, what matchup? It was a beatdown, it wasn't a matchup. LOSER: Don't match it. Imagine it was a mugging. Daniel: Yeah. Then there was the bench. DJ Moore scored 24 points sitting there, unused for Plague of Anubis. Would have lifted him out of the last scoring team. That one hurts. Moore alone LOSER: yeah. Daniel: would have not made a significant dent in the deficit, however. And on the other side, saving Ryan private Ryan's privates also had some points available with Jacoby Myers and Tyler Ergia, each scoring 12.40 points from the bench. So the final story is pretty simple. Saving Priv Ryan's Privates got elite production from its stars, while Plague of Anubis got buried by several low-scoring starters and left a 24-point performance of DJ Moore on the bench. Saving Private Ryan. Saving Ryan's Privates marches on, and Plague of Anubis. Heads to Hades to decorate. LOSER: yeah, deservingly so. But hey, I'll make it look nice down there for the next person. That's hopefully not me next week. man. Daniel: Yeah. Me Mario: Mm-hmm. LOSER: the couch from T V production in high school. Yeah. Smells like shit, but it was comfortable as fuck. Daniel: Yeah. Yeah. It it had yeah, that's right. It had sad tissues, not happy tissues. LOSER: That's well kind of the point of being down there. Yeah. Yeah. That's all right. yeah. I thankfully got a nap Sunday after I had LBG LBJ's breakfast burrito and it was nice. Daniel: Nice. LOSER: Yeah, it was a nice nap. I really needed it. I hadn't been getting sleep lately, but it was look at my phone I'm predicted two six or two it was hundred it was two in the two hundreds and he was already predicted at the one seventies and I'm like cool shit. Put thumb down. When I woke up it was severely different. It's always those days. It was Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: fun. Good stuff. Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: Gotta be someone down at the bottom. I'll take it. yeah, no, see this is you treacherous bitch. Yeah, she's a treacherous bitch. She Daniel: fantasy football. You treacherous treacherous bitch. LOSER: she'll she'll Me Mario: Mm-hmm. LOSER: Yeah, no, fuck her. Fuck that ho. Fuck Daniel: Yeah, yeah. LOSER: that hoe. Alright, well here. So back at our first official Me Mario: Mm-hmm. LOSER: domestic violence matchup of the year, and it was Daniel: Ha ha ha. LOSER: l it was less couples counseling and more restraining order with a side of humiliation. the one walked into the week thinking they were about to cook. And I mean, like, you know, it looked really bad for the one. Josh Jacobs sitting in the starting lineup for her, you're thinking, man, hasn't had time to look at it, right? No. Instead Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: Yeah, no, it went the other way. They bent over Hail Mary's over the kitchen counter. One ninety-nine point seven one to one sixty-seven point nine, a full thirty-one point, eighty-one point pegging will be remembered. Jess didn't just win. She made her husband look like a piece who showed up late and still underperformed. Mahomes had a full revenge tour with twenty-seven point five six points. And he was settling old scores and making new ones. Plenty of them. Amon Raw put up 24.7 points of peer. I'm better than your entire roster energy. And it showed. Even Josh Jacobs left in her starting running back spot straight donut. Just an emotional support donut, really. Daniel: Ha ha. LOSER: and Brandon Aubrey was kicking air for her because he Didn't do anything. He had a wind tunnel. Another donut. And Me Mario: I know. LOSER: just still walked out, putting up almost two hundred points. So she won the custody battle and took the house. Her five defenders all showed up, and boy were they something. She had I'm gonna read this starting cast of defenders for you. It was pretty good. And we and we questioned the Nick Bosa. We all kind of went, ooh, Nick Bosa. Yeah, he put up twelve points. Jack Campbell, fourteen points. Kyle Hamilton only put up a nine, but Derwin James put up twenty-one and Devin Lloyd put up twenty-two points for the Carolina defense. So we all wanted Devin Lloyd. Boy, was that bad. Meanwhile Sam Laporte put up 13.4 for her. The whole squad just kind of flexed, right? And on her husband's side, disappointment. Dak Prescott continuing his long, lifelong exclusive relationship with disappointment. Jaden Daniel: Hmm. LOSER: Daniels, Ray's only packer, by the way, managed a tragic four points. Drake London did exactly as we suspected. so his Supposed wide receiver one coughed up only 5.2. And the kicker, Dicker, was non-existent. Vanished harder than the Chargers offense on a Sunday. Poof, gone. But they'll be back by week four, apparently, from what Mario's saying. Congratulations, Jess, on a week one victory Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: locked in. Husband thoroughly disciplined, double victory. Domestic violence is already living up to the name. And the scoreboard is currently filing for a protective order on behalf of the one. Although I think it really should rethink that because there's another manager that put up almost a hundred points more than her. So. Daniel: Mm-hmm. LOSER: Congratulations, Jess. Look at that. And we all picked Ray. What the fuck were we thinking? Hmm. Daniel: Right. Mm. Brutal. Me Mario: She always manages to squeak it out, man. No matter what. she she ends up being LOSER: no. Me Mario: one of the more dominant forces in our league. LOSER: Yep, yep, yep, yep. Both the girls tend to start that way in the season. so Me Mario: But I thought that Josh Jacobs pick was gonna kill her. Yep. LOSER: did I. Yeah, it didn't do anything. And now that he's only gonna miss you know, game or two, I mean he gonna Daniel: Maybe. LOSER: come back and he's gonna kill it for her when he does come back, I think. So Yeah, we'll see how long, I know, right? Me Mario: Yeah, I'm I'm told it's gonna be about Daniel: Nice. All right. Me Mario: six, seven weeks. So in our next matchup, LOSER: Interesting. Me Mario: we have Kuiper Belt Soldiers versus Hercules Huge Soc. Jose versus Vince. Vince is our former champion. And Jose it's been a while. Daniel: Hmm. Me Mario: But he always manages to put up a really strong team. I was surprised To honor Jose with the Spartan Shield in this one. This was the closest loss of 16.86 difference between their score. And it didn't go how I planned at all. I think a lot of us had different thoughts on how week one was gonna score. Vince had just the right just the right champions to pull in the win. As many players underperformed on both teams, but Isaiah fucking likely was tied in number one with a godlike 32.8 points. Nico Collins contributed with 19.4 and the Steelers defense under new defensive coordinator Patrick Graham put up 35.6 points. It was enough to combat Jose's LOSER: Wasn't it Me Mario: superiority at QB and running back for Vince's first win of his new champion season. LOSER: Nah, defenders already at it. Daniel: Mm-hmm. And now I LOSER: Not good for the rest of us. Daniel: I I do have to say for the Armstrong Uden household, I am in a work league with his wife for her first ever fantasy football season. And she came through LOSER: Ooh man. Daniel: with win as well. So they're both dancing this week. LOSER: man, okay. Well I got another drop Me Mario: Nice. LOSER: for that one. Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: Absolutely. Good for her. I like that. Right on. Daniel: Yeah. Yeah, she's got a pretty good team. I like it. Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: And you know what? Her concentration was? nobody with any domestic ty violence charges. I was like, love it. Yes. Yeah. LOSER: Love it. Love it. Yeah, that's awesome. That's awesome. Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: Yeah. Alright, our next battle is another show host, Smitey Mighty Bastons versus Owl Formation. OLO Formation takes this one. Not gonna bury the lead here. 213.04 LOSER: Mm. Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: to 182.52. But Smitey Mighty Bastones put up a strong score and had plenty of production across the lineup. For Smitey Mighty Bastones, the biggest stars were Jalen Hurts, which he was high on. With 37.12 LOSER: Mm, mm-hmm. Daniel: points. And DeAndre Swift LOSER: Yeah. Daniel: with 37 points. And still didn't manage to be the top running back of the week. Was especially impressive. rushing for Me Mario: Yeah, I was facing him. LOSER: Yeah. Daniel: 100 yeah rushing for 124 yards and three touchdowns. Debo Sandal Debo Samuel added 24.1 while the Eagles defense contributed 14.10 points. That's pretty solid core of production. The problem came LOSER: Absolutely. Daniel: from a few lineup holes. Miles Garrett finished with zero points. And is now being ruled out. LOSER: Yeah, Ernie didn't show to the field. Daniel: On IR. Well, Trey Hendrickson managed just two points, and Josh Downs scored 7.7. Those lower-scoring IDP scop spots added up quickly, and the bench wouldn't have helped with Kalon Black adding eleven point eight points, only good enough to outscore starter Josh Downs. So at least you know there's really nothing you could have done on that one. LOSER: Mm-hmm. Daniel: Owl Formation, meanwhile, had an absolute monster game from Derrick Henry, who scored forty-two. Point one points, again, not the highest scoring running back of the week. After rushing for 144 yards and three touchdowns. Trey Hendrickson wasn't Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: the only IDP issues this week because Owl Formation got twenty points from N'Kobe Dean and another twenty from Alex Singleton. While Tyler Loop kicked for eighteen points and the Raiders added Raiders defense Ravens defense. Added 23.6. The defensive production was a huge part of the win. IDP IDP There were some disappointments for our formation too. Rashid Rice managed only 8.9 points saved by a touchdown, and Travis Hunter scored 3.8 points. But the biggest missed opportunity was sitting on the bench. Kyle Manungai was the wasn't the only huge performer available. Tyler Shuck also scored 28.5 points, and Kyle Manon. Nungai did score 26.4 points. Well, RJ Harvey added 18.3. Any of those could have pushed for the final score even higher. In the end, 213.04 beats 182.52 with Derek Henry and a dominant defensive showing giving Owl Formation enough firepower to survive Smighty Mighty Bostone's hurt. Hurt swift combination. Smitey Mighty Bass Stones had the punches. Owl formation simply landed a few more. LOSER: Pretty good. And that's a good nice matchup. It's nicely even. Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: Nice and even it was close. LOSER: You know, I'd like to say we're and two on the host right now. Just saying, just Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: saying. Daniel: Two LOSER: And is it possible that last year's curse has coming back? So just pointing Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: that one out, but all right. brutal absolute Me Mario: Only a single winner each week. LOSER: Yeah, sorry. I was I was just waiting. I didn't want to like hint at the next one. So okay, brutal, absolute domination here. Chass and the Victorious Valkyries dropped 294.41. A nuclear bomb on all e Vera thragda's vengeance, casually collected both she got massacre of the week and conqueror of the week. Like she was picking up milk on her way home. A Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: 70 point beatdown. It was actually 70 point zero five. Left in 70. isn't isn't a loss, it's a public execution with extra steps. And the purest form of disrespect, she left enough points on the bench to clear over a hundred, and quite a quite a good clearing. so that's not coaching, that's flexing. The starting lineup was just disgusting. Jaden Daniels 23.16, Jonathan Taylor had twenty eight point nine, Chris Olave had a great game, twenty six point seven, Dallas Goddard thirty point two. Kenneth Walker was the RB1 with 45.2. Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: this man played offense, defense, and special teams. I'd like to point out that he actually played better than a lot of people's entire benches this week. So Daniel: Mm, mhm. LOSER: Zach Bond with 29 points. Terrell Bernard 23. Eddie Pinero kicked even 12 points for her. The whole team was just killing it. it's not a fantasy team. That's an all-star game that accidentally got scheduled against some poor guy named Ali. Walker alone scored more than half the league's benches. Me Mario: You love to see it. LOSER: yeah. And honestly, Ali wanted to pick a Kansas City player. He picked the wrong one, apparently. So Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: could Walker was left on the table for her to get. At one point, the app probably asked Chass if she wanted to play Me Mario: No mistake. LOSER: on easy mode. Daniel: Mm-hmm. LOSER: And the sickest part, Ollie's 224.36 was this week's fourth highest score. So honestly, dude showed up in the alley with a gun and straight up ran into a lightsaber. In any of the other matchups, he would have won and been a bigger blowout if he played me than what he played chassis to be completely honest. Daniel: sí LOSER: It really would have been almost 100 points if he played me. But against Daniel: Okay. LOSER: the Valkyrie squad, it just got turned into a participation trophy with a sad face emoji on it. So week one, Chass already has the league's respect. I'd say Ollie's pride stuffed into a body bag. Nasty way to start the year. Someone check if Ollie's okay. I think we should send out a That's the health checks. Daniel: It called for a health check? LOSER: Call a call for a yeah. Me Mario: At least a fruit basket. LOSER: A call for a health and wellness. A fruit basket. Daniel: Send send a raven. LOSER: Send a ravens. Yeah, I mean he had a great look Lamar Jackson thirty-two point three six. B. John Robinson thirty-three point five. I mean, his team put up good numbers. Vaughn Miller put up twenty six points playing for Jackson. I mean, I love it. that's that's not Vaughn, that's Ventral Miller. Yeah, that was Ventral. Ventral Miller. Me Mario: Vantrill. Mm-hmm. Right. Daniel: Ventro Miller, garbage time, tackle, tackle, tackle. LOSER: Yeah, he definitely got a bunch of garbage time shit. Ernest Jones, twenty one points. This he everyone did well. He would have beaten anybody else in the league practically. Daniel: Dude, the Jacksonville Jaguars kicked the crap out of Cleveland so bad that they they pulled f Follier Lacoon halfway through the third quarter. LOSER: Do you see some of the clips Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: from the game from that game? Have you Daniel: Yes. LOSER: seen like some of just some blown coverage on Chicago's part? Like on on Daniel: Mm. Mm-hmm. LOSER: on Cleveland's part, there was their middle linebacker for one play was just standing there. Ball Daniel: Yes. LOSER: gets hiked and he didn't Me Mario: I saw them. LOSER: move. You see this way? He didn't move at all, and then the ball gets thrown fast, and he like, shit. And Me Mario: Yeah. He didn't move until after the ball was thrown. Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: they started running. Yeah, he started running. He's like, shit, I better go get that. Yeah, well fuck. Daniel: Yeah, they said Carson Sweeschinger struggled heavily in the new scheme, so that's a painful one too. But LOSER: Yeah. Me Mario: That's rough. I saw some disrespectful throws from Lawrence. They were pretty beautiful. Daniel: they I they they did the dude Yeah. They they also did the reception perception for the Browns past catchers including Harold Fannon. And and so it was like fourth Best KC Conception had the fourth bet fourth best separation score of any receiver in the league this week. Denzel Boston had the seventh best separation score of any receiver this week. And Harold Fannin was like the second best separation for any tight end for the week. So it's just straight quarterback play. It's straight just horrible Me Mario: Yep. Yep. Daniel: quarterback play. LOSER: Yeah. Daniel: And a brand new scheme on defense that might not match the players that they actually have there. LOSER: Yeah. Me Mario: You know the Browns are emailing Daniel: Brutal. Me Mario: all these stats to the Mannings and being like we it's perfect for your son for your nephew to come out this way. Daniel: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. LOSER: Yeah. Everything here is ready. It's we're we're ready for Daniel: that's why they're not gonna play Sador. Sidur would actually give a fighting chance. There is also Me Mario: Yes. Daniel: there was also report that they were drug testing Deshaun Watson on the sideline before and after the game also. So it LOSER: No shit. Daniel: seems like what they're doing because he has a clause in his contract that Me Mario: Yes. To void his contract. Daniel: if he fails it'll avoid his contract and they won't have to pay him shit. So I think they're just putting him out there to try to find every excuse possible to try to void his contract. LOSER: Yeah. Absolutely. We made a mistake. How can we get out of it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That that we learned last Me Mario: On on top of that they have insurance money on him. If if he Daniel: Yeah. And the insurance money, yeah. LOSER: year, yeah. Me Mario: Yeah, so if he gets hurt again, then the insurance will pay his salary instead of the Browns. And they'll get that added to their cap next year. So lots of lots of good things there. Yeah, another another good thing is LOSER: Smart. Very smart. Yeah. Daniel: Yeah. They're telling the offensive like wyman, You don't like him, right? LOSER: Mm. Me Mario: Yeah. Y you you're they're like, Daniel: Just let him go. Me Mario: how comfortable do you feel bending over in front of a sex offender fifty two snaps a game? Daniel: Yeah. Hmm. Yeah. One snap for every victim. Crazy. Me Mario: so on on a lighter note, Daniel pulled out a win this week. so I swear every single LOSER: Only one. Me Mario: almost every single one I said would win this week lost. So Daniel got the good luck charm of having me vote against him. very, very Daniel: Mm-hmm. Me Mario: happy it was you. Daniel put the belief in himself and didn't just win, but rallied his followers to an ass whooping. Trevor Lawrence, JSN, David Montgomery, Brees Hall, Raiders Defense, Foyas Aid Alakun, Jihad Campbell, and Jacob Rodriguez all brought their A game to Ananke's Temple. LOSER: I thought you'd like that. It's perfect time how you're reading Me Mario: man. Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: everything off. It was just such a setup. Me Mario: they they came down and almost could have outscored Robbie's team by themselves. That group of individuals Daniel: Yeah. Me Mario: scored extremely high. And Robbie was let down by Baker Mayfield's three fumbles. And though they fought valiantly, Javante Williams, Justin Jefferson, Trey McBride, and even the kicker Evan McPherson putting up great numbers weren't enough for the rest of his team. Just laying down their lives on the steps of his own temple. So Victory to Daniel. Way to get the ass whooping in there. he still scored higher than I did, but he faced the right guy, so you really gave it to Robbie, and I'm sure he'll be massaging that sore ass Daniel: Mm-hmm. Me Mario: with pride. Daniel: Yeah. I didn't even play LOSER: Mm-hmm. Daniel: my first round pick this year or this week either. LOSER: Green. Daniel: Yeah, it felt Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: good. Feels good. Yeah. Yeah. That's okay. Last last year my first round pick got broken. LOSER: I played him, he put up a donut. And to see that Cole Komet got thirteen points. Me Mario: Julian Love. Daniel: man. Yeah. Cole Komet, 13 points. Yeah. LOSER: He got thirteen points. Fuck. Daniel: dude. My biggest one of my biggest pickups of the week also was Michael Mayer. He was still on waivers. And I was like, LOSER: Good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Daniel: I am really hurting at tight end. So I'll take him. Thank you very much. And Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: yeah, that was nice. LOSER: You know the sad thing that most of the week I had seen Coker sitting there and I'm something in the back of my head was telling me go grab him. Carolina's gonna do Daniel: Love Coker. LOSER: well. Fuck, dude. I should have. Like, yeah. Hmm. Gotta Daniel: Love Coker. LOSER: listen gotta listen to that little boy. Yeah, dude, Coker, man. Fucking kid is talented. Me Mario: But who who do you drop him for? Daniel: I have been Me Mario: The size of our benches are so small. I'm like, there's all kinds of people on waivers. Daniel: there's Yeah, LOSER: Mm- Me Mario: I'm like, y you could literally re scrap your whole Daniel: it's true. One or two would have been nice. Me Mario: team and pick everybody up off waivers and actually do okay. Daniel: Yeah, I last couple of years there's a section of fantasy footballers that are coker believers and we call ourselves the Cokeheads and I am I am firmly one of them. Me Mario: Mm-hmm. LOSER: I liked that. That's funny. That's funny. Alright. let's see. That was our last Daniel: Alright. The last matchup of the week. What right now right now is last. I'm an Aztec warrior. Versus LOSER: Deserves the deep voice. Daniel: That's right, he gets it. For week one, Me Mario: yeah, yeah. Daniel: absolutely. versus Rusty the Hobo. Newcomer, Justin, welcome to the league. Welcome to the league. He had a killer draft and it just did not translate this week. LOSER: Still, I thought it was a killer pucking draft. Yeah. Daniel: It still was a killer draft. I am an Aztec Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: warrior, takes this matchup 273.962, 204.47. And this one was essentially decided by an absolutely ridiculous combination of quarterback and running back production. I'm an Aztec Warrior came out swinging with Caleb Williams putting up 44.26 points, followed by Ashton Genty with 37.8 points. These running back points were ridiculous this week. Williams accounted Me Mario: Yeah, they were Daniel: for four touchdowns, while Genty added two touchdowns and 147 total yards. Zay Flowers also exploded for 29.2. JJ Watt delivered 35.75 points with two sacks, an interception, and a touchdown. Those four players alone produced nearly 150 points. There were a few weak spots though. Quinson Judkins scored just 9.4 points. Nick Bonito had three. And only eight from Jason Myers. But those misses were almost irrelevant because the top of the lineup was carrying an enormous load. Rusty the hobo had a monster performance of his own from Jameer Gibbs who scored 42.4 points after rushing for 156 yards and two touchdowns. Jacksonsville defense added 27.95 points while Edrin Cooper posted 19 and Diane Henley added 11.5. Gibbs was the clear center piece. But there simply isn't enough production around him. And then we get to the bench where Rusty the Hobo left a small fortune sitting around. Jackson Dart scored 35.8 points, which would have been a massive upgrade over Drake May's 15.7. Matthew Golden scored Me Mario: Oof. Daniel: f 14.5 and Bobby Akorke had 14 points. But Dart was the real missed opportunity. Starting him instead of May would have added 20 points, though it really wouldn't have made much difference in the matchup. I'm an Aztec warrior. Also had Woody Marks sitting on the bench with 16.10 points. But with two hundred and seventy three points already on the board, that wasn't exactly keeping anyone awake at night. The final numbers tell the story. Two hundred and seventy-three point six points to two hundred and four point four seven. Rusty and Gibbs, but had Gibbs, but I'm an Aztec warrior had Williams, Genty, Flowers, and Watt all delivering huge performances at the same time. Rusty the Hobo brought a Gibbs powered wagon to a four headed dragon fight and it did not go well. LOSER: Yeah. Me Mario: Mm. LOSER: That draft tra it's that was one draft that scared me and it just didn't translate. Daniel: Not in week one. Yeah. LOSER: We'll see how week to two goes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll see how the adjustments and everything happens in week two. Daniel: Yeah. And Martin was the second highest scoring team Me Mario: Yeah. Well Daniel: of the week. LOSER: Yeah. Yes he was. I'm an Aztec warrior. He did very well. Go, Martin. Yeah. Daniel: Yep. Very nice, Martin. he did very well. He did very well. I came so close Me Mario: Mm-hmm. Daniel: to to starting Parker Washington over Devontae Smith. And that would have added solid ten points to my score also. So LOSER: Yeah. Daniel: but that's yeah. Via Levial. LOSER: Yeah, yeah, I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm I'm just Daniel: Still got the W. yeah. It just feels good 'cause my my last week ones the last couple of years have been so bad. So bad. LOSER: yeah, yeah. Well hey, but we're back to that one one one of us hosts winning, so congratulations to you. So nice, nice, Daniel: Mm. Yeah, thank you, thank you. LOSER: yeah. Daniel: Alright. LOSER: Mm-hmm. Daniel: Now we go to Do we go to the treasure hunters? LOSER: This week's hidden godly treasures. Daniel: Or yeah, or do we go up back to the surprises of the week? Well let's go let's I think move forward and if we got time we'll go back. Yeah. Let's do this. LOSER: We're a fifty two yeah, we're a fifty two. Yeah. This can all be caught this can be copied and taken over. I hear working Daniel: Yeah. Alright. LOSER: hard. Daniel: Mario. You're up for the hidden treasures. Me Mario: Hidden treasures. Here we go. Matthew Golden. It was up in the air. Which Green Bay Packers wide receiver was gonna get the load? Was it gonna be Jaden Reed? Was it gonna be Matthew Golden or was it gonna be Christian Watson? And the answer was not Jaden Reed. Matthew Golden put up great points Daniel: Hm. Me Mario: in week one. Going up for fourteen and a half points. Not bad at all. Christian Watson. Ended up being the king on that, so I'm pretty excited about that. Daniel got the defensive player with Jacob Rodriguez, which killed me. I was dying LOSER: Yeah. Daniel: Yeah. Me Mario: to add him to my team. And LOSER: Fourteen tackles. Me Mario: to see Miles Garrett put up a zero and Hendrickson put up what he did. All for me to wait and watch Daniel pick up Jacob Rodriguez before me. that that hurt. Daniel: Yes. Me Mario: Honorable me honorable mention was Daniel LOSER: Mm-hmm. Me Mario: picking up the Raiders defense, which he's hitting the waiver Daniel: Yes. LOSER: Solid. Me Mario: wire for his defenses, streaming them, and he chose wisely. So good on you for that one. They did really well there too. LOSER: Abs Absolut. Yeah, we'll have to follow you week to week and see how you do with your your waiver wire grabs for defense. So Daniel: Mm. We'll have to see. LOSER: Alright. last week with our favored by the gods, Mario led us. Well no, Daniel led us. Daniel led with three and four, while me and Mario just one and Daniel: Waiting. LOSER: six. week one, man, what are you thinking? What are you thinking? What just a fucking Yeah, I know. Me Mario: Yeah. It's so bad. Daniel: I'm just excited. This has been the for the best week one in years. LOSER: If you say so, if you say so. So let's see how week two pans out and well let's let's pick something, so. Daniel: first matchup, Plague of Anubis versus the Hail Mary. LOSER: Hey look, it's week two and the the the the wind is blown out of my sail 'cause I'm not picking Daniel: no. okay. LOSER: myself. Ray If I'm gonna win something, I'm gonna win this damn pick'em, all right. So fuck fuck that. Daniel: Ray. Yes. Me Mario: Yep. I'm Yeah. Daniel: Totally. Yeah, Ray. I think Ray across the board. Me Mario: Hail Mary's LOSER: Yeah. Daniel: Alright. Second, saving Ryan's privates, Uncle Rob versus Rusty the Hobo, Justin. we all went Justin across the board. Wow. LOSER: Yeah. I know your I know your uncle beat me, but it wasn't a big beating. So we'll see how his team does. I just man, I don't know. Me Mario: Mm-hmm. LOSER: I like Justin's team. And again, that team scares the shit Me Mario: Yeah, he could have got lucky in the first run. Daniel: Then yeah. LOSER: out of me. So Yeah, that team scares the shit out of me. So I don't know. That's Me Mario: Yeah, Justin's team is Daniel: It looks great. It didn't perform as well as it should have, but it looks great. Me Mario: it's strong. And the next one LOSER: It's something. Hercules huge sock. Me Mario: The one versus Hercules' huge Daniel: Hercules is Me Mario: sock. LOSER: Yeah. Me Mario: I'm picking Vince. Daniel: you're picking Vance and John and I took Jess, the one. The one that's gonna win this week. Alright. next one we got is I'm an Aztec warrior versus Smitey Mighty Bastomes. And we all picked, you know, even though it's Mario's team and Martin's team, we all picked Martin. Sorry, Market. LOSER: You know, he came out with a Me Mario: yeah. LOSER: big sh week one showing and he's got some solid matchups too. I was I was I was penning through some of the matchups I did like Chicago against Minnesota. Yeah, it's gonna be in the rain. I mean he's got Genty versus the Chargers. If they play like they did week one, it's gonna be the Genty game. So, you know. I just kinda like some of these matchups. That's all. Yeah. Me Mario: Yeah, they missed Minter there. Daniel: Mm. Yes they do. Very much so. I mean, and then Me Mario: Yeah, I LOSER: Absolutely, absolutely. let's see. Daniel: Caleb Williams versus Minnesota, so that Me Mario: I'm scared. Daniel: that might come back down to earth a little bit, but they had yeah. They had a good defense going LOSER: No, they do go mm-hmm. Daniel: crazy week one, so we'll see how it goes. LOSER: Yeah. I do like Minnesota's defense, but I I don't know. I I think Chicago's right that high of Ben Johnson, so Daniel: Carolina Carolina was a top defense last year and they just got LOSER: Hey, and I think there's Daniel: pinned for fifty nine points in week one. So I mean they they lost LOSER: And I still think they're a good top defense. Daniel: two pieces of veteran present, but that they lost Horn, Me Mario: Think they're pretty good too. LOSER: Horn was Horn's a big Horn's a big piece though, but yeah. Yeah. Daniel: Lloyd and Robinson, one at every level. LOSER: Yeah. Daniel: Crazy. Alright, next matchup is Kuiper Belt Soldiers, Jose, versus Ananke's Temple of BDSM, Robbie. We went Robbie. I went LOSER: I went Robbie. We split. Yeah. Daniel: Jose and Mario went Robbie. LOSER: Yeah, yeah. Me Mario: Yep. Daniel: Alright. You got me paranoid, but I'm gonna I'm gonna keep it. I'm not gonna look any deeper. Don't look, I'm not gonna look, I'm not gonna look. Alright. LOSER: Sorry, Jose. Don't don't aimi. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't don't look. Don't look. Don't look. Don't worry about it. don't worry about it. Al Formation versus Vera Thragna's Vengeance. So one and O versus O and one. You know, this is one that I kinda like typed and I went, ooh, ooh. I don't know if I want to give it to Ollie. You know what I mean? I mean it's fucking holy, so Daniel: you've wanted to give it to Ollie for a while. LOSER: well I mean Give him the finger. Hey And I put a ring on it. I put a ring on for you too, so I just had Me Mario: Mm-hmm. Daniel: Yeah, yeah. Yeah. LOSER: I keep seeing Mario Me Mario: There you go. LOSER: with his, so I had to go get mine. I had to go get mine, Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: so you know. Yeah. I'll have to leave on the desk for next week. okay. Our final Me Mario: I went with the V on this one too. LOSER: matchup. You went yeah, you went with yeah, we all g we all went all these, so Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: our final battle. Apache Gorillas, Daniel taking on the Victorious Valkyries. Both one of no teams. Daniel: Chass is a monster. I am scared. I'm scared. LOSER: I'd be scared. I'd be scared of every yeah, I'd be I'd be scared of every Me Mario: She is. Yeah. LOSER: yeah. But you put but you put you dot dot dot. I like the dot dot. Yeah yeah. Yeah. You're gonna keep the dot dot. Yeah, I like that. Daniel: I did. I that I it worked week one. I'm going for it again. Yeah. We're gonna keep the dot dot dot because we I think we both have very strong teams. I just think that her caliber of strong team is built like mine. It's just a little bit better. Yeah. Like all all just like all LOSER: It's just a little bit more fucking fucking team, man. Daniel: like I've got high quality players at key positions and hers are just better than mine and at the same key positions. Yeah, yeah. LOSER: Just two hundred and ninety-four, yeah, no. I saw fuck what did I do what she had on the bench? It was Fuck it was like I don't know, sixteen points sitting on the bench from who was it? Yeah, sixteen points. Daniel: Week one. LOSER: Yeah, she had David. Yeah, linebacker Davis and then 20 points from Patrick Wilson. She had Wilson put up 20 points. She could have rotated somebody else out like Quay Walker. She had Quay Walker and dropped 11. Could have definitely put up another nine points. I just fucking my goodness. 300. That's already this year's highest score. Starting in a big high point week one. She's you know, setting the bar high. I still Daniel: Yeah. LOSER: I was I liked that one website we were looking at. It was football, fantasy football, fantasy hall of fame. Fantasy Hall of Fame. That was Daniel: yeah, that's right. LOSER: a that was interesting to look at all the stats and see everything because it pulls your it pulls your league and grabs everything going back to when Yahoo started. So it'd be what, 2011 when they started keeping track of stats and remembering them. So that was really cool. Daniel: Oof. LOSER: So yeah I know, right? all right. Well let's see we're in a we're in an hour. Do you wanna read through your shit real quick? Do you think you can do it real quick, Mario, or you wanna save it? Me Mario: Sure. Let's do it real fast. Okay. LOSER: Yeah. All right, run through. Me Mario: So we've got what's it called? post week takes prophecies wrath LOSER: Post week one takes. Daniel: Post week one. Me Mario: or glory. What's that? Daniel: Nothing. Me Mario: Alright. LOSER: Just read off. Me Mario: Sorry. Kenneth Walker will be the RB1 this year. the defense looks better like when they won the Super Bowl, so they could lean on their run game a lot more and put less on Mahomes. Tua has not started. So Daniels still went in with his prediction. the Bengals look for real on both sides of the ball. Daniel: That one's fun to pr that one's easy to track, it's LOSER: That's Daniel: fun to practice. LOSER: an easy one. Yeah, that's an easy one. Daniel: Love it. no, everybody LOSER: Yeah, yeah. Daniel: was like two is gonna start, two is gonna play all year, and I was like, he is not starting a single game this year. Mm, so Me Mario: No. Daniel: far. LOSER: Yeah. Mashed potato brains? Me Mario: the next one is trade away your Daniel: Also my next one. Me Mario: star pass rusher. Trey Hendrickson did almost nothing. Miles Garrett and Micah Parsons are both on IR. The teams they came from are doing a little better. Daniel: One of those teams being the Bengals, who look awesome on both sides of the ball with their retool defense. The new coordinator LOSER: They did. Yeah, they did. Me Mario: They sure do. Daniel: and the new pieces that they got on defense. Signing Super Bowl veterans, man, they looked LOSER: Mm-hmm. Daniel: either Tampa looked shit, which they did, LOSER: No, we did. We did. Daniel: but Cincy also just looked really, really good. LOSER: They did. They looked good. We were playing against a good team and we looked so Me Mario: Well, they have so many first rounders on that line. LOSER: bad. Yeah. Daniel: Yeah. Yeah, that the Dexter Lawrence and Jonathan Allen Me Mario: Yeah. And then even Dexter Lawrence. Daniel: next to each other, that's just gnarly. You're not gonna run on that team LOSER: It's pretty devastating. Yeah. We're over here worried about Miles Garrett and Aaron Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: Donald. Daniel: Yeah. They're y people aren't gonna be able to run on that team. Employees Mafe. Me Mario: Yeah, but but look at New York Giants defense. New York Giants defense looks a lot stronger LOSER: Mm, mm. Me Mario: after trading away Dexter Lawrence. So for a team building perspective, it worked for every team LOSER: Mm-hmm. Me Mario: who traded them away. Daniel: Win win. Yeah. LOSER: Yep, yep, yep. Me Mario: Kyler Murray needs to go back to pitching, see if he can still play baseball. Justin Jefferson is back. LOSER: I'd say he's got a good streaming streaming future in Call of Duty, so He'll be a Twitch streamer, Me Mario: Mm. LOSER: in my opinion. Yeah, Me Mario: There you go. LOSER: that's my thoughts, but yeah. Daniel: Yeah, you do that. Kinda like re retirement, right? Me Mario: And then a shining spot for the Buccaneers was that RDBs look for real. Jamar Chase LOSER: Mm-hmm. Me Mario: was held. I mean, he'll need to be held after that game because he can't be happy looking at that stat board. LOSER: Bust of the week. He totally was. Yeah, absolutely. Daniel: Yeah. Me Mario: Yeah. And then T J Want. Daniel: And Higgins. Gaseki killed us. LOSER: Yeah, no, Gosaki Me Mario: Yeah. LOSER: man. Mm. Me Mario: Well, g Gasecchi combined with Anzolone LOSER: But that was the middle of our field. That was Alex Anselone. Yeah, we had some issues. Daniel: Anzelone played for shit. Me Mario: had no coverage shops. What was going on with LOSER: Yeah, you did. Yeah. Me Mario: his coverage? That was bad. LOSER: Yeah, our defense looked like our defense looked like shit, but then again our offense looked like crap too, so fucking I was I was our our offensive line was swish cheese. Baker was throwing Daniel: Our offense looked like shit. Me Mario: I I think I think our D Vs looked amazing. LOSER: fucking dunkers. Daniel: Our D B's LOSER: B Bucky looked like cra he just he wasn't finding the holes. He was just running straight into the back of our own defenders. Or when he found a hole, it wasn't quick enough to get out of the hole 'cause he just gallowed up by three to four Bengals. They were fucking their Daniel: Mm. LOSER: their defence was on it, so Daniel: They're they looked legit. They looked legit. And that's not those are not words I thought that I would say is the Bengals defense looked legit. Me Mario: They got swarm on Yeah. I LOSER: They did. They legitimate made us look like a high school team. Nah. I I Me Mario: I I don't think it was a fluke. LOSER: I was telling my wife before I Yeah, I was telling my wife before we were Daniel: I don't think it was a fluke either. LOSER: gonna luke we were gonna lose week one. I really thought Bengals would do well and they did. So Daniel: they did. Well, I did pick up the Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: Bengals defense this week, so we'll see how that goes. Yep. Yeah, yeah. Well if they're solid again this LOSER: I saw that. I saw that. Drop the Raiders for them. We'll follow. Remember, we gotta follow. We'll follow you week to week on your defense. All right. Me Mario: Mm-hmm. Daniel: week, it might be my defense for the year. I don't know, so LOSER: Yeah, right. TJ Watt will be the defensive Me Mario: All right. LOSER: player of the year, Mario says. Bull take, bolt take. Me Mario: Yeah. So Patrick Graham has gone to Pittsburgh and he says, you know this guy has a history of getting hurt, but per snap, he might be the most explosive defender we've ever seen. And so what did he Daniel: Hmm. Me Mario: do? He has him as a designated Daniel: Sure. Me Mario: player. And all he's doing, almost every play he's on the field, is putting up stats. So he's gonna get way less snaps, and he might actually do this, so. There go. Last one, Trevor Lawrence might be the prince that was promised. He might finally live up to his billing. after years LOSER: Finally. Daniel: Let's hope so. Me Mario: and years. Yeah, he the some of the throws he was doing were downright disrespectful. And it was like you you only have that. Like there aren't many guys in the history of the NFL that could make some of those throws. That was pretty good. Daniel: Correct. Me Mario: Alright. Daniel: Man Excuse me. Thank you. LOSER: I will point I mean, bless you. Bless you. I will say Me Mario: Let's see. LOSER: that the assistance of Liam Liam Cohen has really been a big resurgence for him. ever since he left us and went there. Me Mario: Huge. LOSER: it's been a big help. Big help. So Daniel: Yeah. Finally had a coach that knows how to talk to him and coach him. Me Mario: Huge. Yeah, and did you see how they used LOSER: Big bit. Me Mario: Travis Hunter as a decoy? LOSER: Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. So all right. Well Me Mario: That was that was pretty smart. Play design. LOSER: thanks for joining episode one ninety one of the Gods of War Fo Fo Fantasy Football War Council. We really appreciate you. like, subscribe, share, share us with your friends. Come on. we we're not good information. We're not gonna help you. What are you t what are you talking about? FFWC23 at gmail.com. Right into the show. We are definitely here to give you our mediocre advice. Well, at least my mediocre advice. Daniel: Ha ha. LOSER: And these guys have great advice because Daniel won. And so Daniel: Mm mm mm. LOSER: yeah, I'd follow these guys for sure. and as always, tune in next week, week two, lots of fun. And as always. Daniel: Stay vigilant. LOSER: Mortals? Daniel: C Me Mario: Mortals. Daniel: mortals? Conquerors? Mortals. It's late. Me Mario: Yeah. Daniel: Mm.