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Stereotype Karaoke · Nick and Kristen in the Podcast

• 0:11
  Hello and welcome to Nick and Kristen in the podcast.
• 0:14
  Another episode to get you going on your morning routine.
• 0:20
  Anyway, so we're going to talk about some weird stuff today.
• 0:22
  Basically I am going back to my past where it all began hosting
• 0:27
  karaoke. Your favorite?
• 0:30
  Thing I know our boss went to Egypt and somebody just died in
• 0:34
  Egypt, so I want to. Talk about that.
• 0:36
  I'm assuming a lot of people die in Egypt.
• 0:37
  Yes, so this was a tourist. And so I was like, oh, for a
• 0:40
  second, yeah. And then Shannon Elizabeth is on
• 0:42
  Only Fans and I want to talk about it.
• 0:44
  So, but first, let's talk about karaoke nights.
• 0:49
  I occasionally fill in for DJ Pauly, who is the DJ at a place
• 0:54
  called the Ponderosa here in Portland.
• 0:56
  And he hosts like Friday, Saturday, Wednesday, actually
• 0:59
  Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, they do all this stuff and they
• 1:01
  just started karaoke night on Wednesday and I've never filled
• 1:05
  in for him on Wednesdays. And I'm going to next week.
• 1:08
  And I started my whole like, basic radio career hosting
• 1:16
  karaoke. Yeah, like entertainment career
• 1:17
  because it wasn't on the radio, but you just started, like,
• 1:20
  hosting things and being in front of a microphone at this
• 1:24
  karaoke night. It was an interesting and
• 1:27
  interesting experience. So not only was it a karaoke
• 1:29
  night, it was a karaoke night at a biker bar in the like worst
• 1:35
  part of Las Vegas. It was called Bucks Tavern.
• 1:40
  I'm not even sure if it still exists or.
• 1:41
  Not yeah. There's no way it made it past
• 1:43
  the pandemic and the recession. I I have no karaoke experience.
• 1:46
  I don't like singing in front of people.
• 1:48
  I don't know why I got this. Job.
• 1:50
  Well, because the karaoke job it like it's required that you
• 1:53
  participate in the karaoke. Yes, yeah, it it helps to the
• 1:57
  singers feel more comfortable if you can fill the gaps.
• 2:00
  You kick it off right, but you said the vibe.
• 2:03
  But what happens a lot of that time is that the karaoke host
• 2:06
  tends to be the person that wants the karaoke the most.
• 2:10
  And that's always sat wrong with me.
• 2:12
  So you go to these karaoke bars and if nobody's singing, they're
• 2:15
  singing. And it's not because they want
• 2:17
  to inspire you to sing, It's because this is their moment.
• 2:19
  But that's their job. They want people that are
• 2:21
  outgoing, that are going to take the mic when it's dead and
• 2:24
  that's it is going to inspire other people either to be like,
• 2:27
  I cannot sit by that guy, do another song.
• 2:30
  Or it's like, Oh yeah, that's a good song.
• 2:32
  I could do something like this or.
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  Definitely breaks up the monotony of like, because you
• 2:35
  get two or three people and they rotate.
• 2:36
  But I, I was not that guy and they hired me anyway.
• 2:40
  So I don't know what but I would do.
• 2:42
  I would rap because those are the only songs I knew how to
• 2:44
  sing. Were these rap songs like fun
• 2:47
  rap songs like Baby Got Back and like Rapper's Delight and stuff
• 2:50
  like that. And so I would rap those things
• 2:52
  in between. I don't even know Jessie's girl
• 2:55
  karaoke. Like.
• 2:57
  You were, You've never. Seen I've never seen you
• 2:59
  karaoke. Oh yeah, OK.
• 3:01
  Never, because I've never karaoked.
• 3:03
  Yeah. Well, all we do when when we
• 3:05
  have together been at a karaoke thing, we play our favorite game
• 3:09
  which is stereotype karaoke. Stereotype karaoke.
• 3:12
  And I'll get to that in a second, but I've never seen you
• 3:15
  go on stage and like, sing a song.
• 3:17
  I think it might blow my mind because you're so like, mild
• 3:20
  mannered and like, shucks. And like, nobody wants to.
• 3:24
  I don't want to. Nobody look at me, please.
• 3:26
  Yeah. And like, then to get up there
• 3:28
  and sing Rapper's Delight, like, I've never seen that side of you
• 3:32
  in my entire 20 years I've known you.
• 3:34
  It's nothing to write home about.
• 3:35
  Like it's not like I become. Oh no, I didn't think it was
• 3:37
  good. It's not like I can become this
• 3:39
  other person on stage where I'm like, I was like.
• 3:41
  It is Neil Diamond. That's what he said there.
• 3:43
  Let's go, everybody. Now it's me reading the words
• 3:46
  even though I know him off the screen.
• 3:48
  But how are you not beat red cause like?
• 3:50
  You're even. Getting just like Red, just
• 3:52
  talking about it just now, the thought of being on stage I just
• 3:55
  can't imagine. So I might show up with Lily hid
• 3:58
  in the backpack or something so I can see this.
• 4:00
  I'm not singing because it's open mic night and carry
• 4:02
  goodnight. It should hopefully have people
• 4:04
  filled. If not, I'm just gonna play
• 4:06
  songs with words and help gonna have to.
• 4:08
  Jump. In I will only do tone Loke.
• 4:11
  OK, it's the. Only one I do so stereotype
• 4:13
  karaoke, by the way, it's best played on a cruise ship when
• 4:17
  there's a variety of different individuals come together.
• 4:20
  You bring a a bunch of singles and you put your dollar down
• 4:24
  based on what the person looks like, you guess what they're
• 4:28
  going to sing. Stereotype karaoke.
• 4:29
  You stereotype the person who's on their way to the stage.
• 4:33
  Once they get to the stage, you're like, all right.
• 4:35
  This person is definitely giving me Britney Spears vibes.
• 4:39
  Right. And it's always like the big
• 4:40
  biker dude that with the two like tight shirt, like he's,
• 4:44
  yeah, he's always going up there to sing something ironically,
• 4:47
  right? But it's always something he
• 4:48
  knows all the words to. Yeah, it's either something
• 4:52
  funny or like, or he's going to blow us away like it's either
• 4:55
  Chris Stapleton or Barbie. Girl Chris Stapleton but like
• 4:58
  based on what they look like and then whoever's closer gets the
• 5:01
  pot and so that's what you do after a couple drinks.
• 5:03
  It's hilarious you do with. Shots too.
• 5:05
  If you want, yeah, it can get kind of spicy here and there
• 5:08
  because you're like, oh, I know what that person's gonna sing.
• 5:12
  And then you're like, oh, that was way off.
• 5:14
  And I just want to tell stories from my karaoke experience too,
• 5:16
  because like, there are so many just absurd moments from when I
• 5:20
  host to karaoke, like back again, Bucks Tavern in Vegas.
• 5:24
  And there were people that were just hammered.
• 5:26
  Oh sure, singing. And they would just sing the
• 5:29
  they thought they could sing. What's the song?
• 5:31
  A little Diddy. Yeah, yeah, I've.
• 5:34
  Heard that song from this one guy so many times.
• 5:36
  Like it it it. I'm left scarred by a lot of
• 5:39
  these songs. Just that one.
• 5:40
  And any Neil Diamond song, there was a guy that would come in and
• 5:44
  be Neil. Diamond well, you told me that
• 5:45
  he had his specific track, his listing on the.
• 5:48
  Karaoke more than. Worst and like he had like his
• 5:51
  own microphone that he wanted because it had a reverb on it.
• 5:54
  But stereotype karaoke. I'm going to throw this out at
• 5:56
  you because I know the answer. I know you're going to know the
• 5:58
  answer. OK?
• 5:59
  An elderly woman. Yes, an elderly.
• 6:01
  I'm going to say late 50s early 60s.
• 6:04
  So not super elderly, but withered.
• 6:07
  She's she's seen. A couple she's she's on her
• 6:09
  second marriage, you know that's fine she's got some older kids,
• 6:12
  maybe 1 doesn't talk to her anymore she's.
• 6:14
  Wearing clothes that is inappropriate for her age.
• 6:17
  Yes, she absolutely is. She gets up there, she puts her
• 6:20
  cigarette out and she starts to walk up.
• 6:23
  What is she singing? She is singing just like a white
• 6:27
  wing dumb sings a Fleetwood. I'd sing a Fleetwood or or hit
• 6:34
  me with your best shot. See, I was going to do a black
• 6:36
  velvet woman. No, that's so that's the.
• 6:39
  Red Velvet. Woman, right?
• 6:41
  Black velvet. Black velvet, Black velvet in
• 6:43
  that little. Butt Yeah, that's the girl
• 6:45
  that's wearing the cowboy hat, ironically, and too tight of
• 6:49
  jeans and boots that are clean. OK, well, that's.
• 6:52
  Black Velvet, that's how you play the game.
• 6:56
  Have fun. That's your next karaoke.
• 6:57
  In fact, come down if you're in town.
• 6:58
  If you're in Portland, come. Down.
• 7:00
  Oh no. Not but but Ponderosa.
• 7:03
  So our boss likes to go to Egypt.
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  I don't know why. It's like the last place.
• 7:07
  I think second to last place on this planet.
• 7:09
  I want to. Go Yeah, the history is amazing.
• 7:12
  One of the oldest friend that I have, We have been friends since
• 7:16
  I was 13. So we have been friends for 31
• 7:19
  years. He is from Egypt, he is Egyptian
• 7:24
  and he says it's hell on earth and every time he had to go back
• 7:28
  to Egypt to visit his family, he hated it.
• 7:31
  Yes, and I hear like we had a I have a friend that isn't radio
• 7:36
  that just went to Egypt by himself, had a ball and he's
• 7:39
  like a white guy and like you're if you look like a tourist, like
• 7:43
  you're in trouble. But he said he had a great time.
• 7:46
  And then Scott, our boss, our old boss looks like a tourist
• 7:49
  too. And he always goes back.
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  It's like one of his favorite places.
• 7:53
  So I don't know. I don't like heat.
• 7:55
  I don't care about pyramids and like I.
• 7:58
  The Egypt I care about the pyramids.
• 8:00
  The Egyptian history is great. Like it's fascinating.
• 8:03
  You can't not be somewhat interested, right, Because like
• 8:06
  they were the first US, they were the first civilization.
• 8:08
  They had like all these things and they built so many and they
• 8:11
  had they built a, but I want to go in one like that sounds like
• 8:14
  a terrible. Really be into it.
• 8:16
  I used to love Egypt. I used to want to go.
• 8:18
  I used to want to like immerse myself in it.
• 8:21
  But like, it's become, it's not this mystical experience that
• 8:26
  you think it's going to be like they, I've heard stories of
• 8:29
  people leaving you in the pyramids and then blackmailing
• 8:32
  you for more money to let you out.
• 8:34
  And like, people will will pull up the ladder and be like, all
• 8:37
  right, that's going to be an extra $20.
• 8:39
  And that's terrifying. I don't even want to be anywhere
• 8:42
  near. That I'm not saying anything
• 8:43
  about the culture or anything like that.
• 8:44
  I'm sure it's lovely, but like, you can't, you just can't trust
• 8:47
  people and I'm not going to go into an enclosed space where it
• 8:51
  could be scary for me like that. And I've seen some of the
• 8:54
  pictures that he posted you can go to like King Tutankhamun's
• 8:58
  gravesite or where they have them, but it's like all things
• 9:01
  enclosed in glass. It looks like it's just a
• 9:03
  museum. Well, what do you think?
• 9:04
  You're going to be able to crawl into the tomb and like I.
• 9:06
  Want it to still be dusty, you know, like at least be not look
• 9:08
  like you put in. You want it to be in.
• 9:10
  You want to feel like you're in the Mummy all of a sudden, like
• 9:12
  you pick up a tablet and you go when all the dust goes
• 9:15
  everywhere and you've unleashed the the ancient curse.
• 9:18
  Exactly. At least fake it for each each
• 9:20
  tourist that goes down there you have someone come in and put
• 9:22
  the. Dirt.
• 9:22
  No, because you can go to Taco Bell and look at the Sphinx
• 9:25
  while you're eating. I know that's how close the
• 9:28
  Pizza Hut is in Egypt. Like it's.
• 9:30
  Very like. Weird now.
• 9:32
  I just don't want it to be. I want it to be untouched.
• 9:34
  But they're in there and they've touched it.
• 9:36
  And so everybody, everybody's like, it's like, it's not what
• 9:39
  it was when you found it. And I only care if it looks like
• 9:42
  the way you found it you. Want to be there when it's?
• 9:44
  Because I could just see it in a museum.
• 9:46
  Like why am I going to go down 500 feet?
• 9:49
  Into a pyramid, but somebody died there is that what you you
• 9:52
  said that somebody who died in Egypt that was oh.
• 9:54
  Yeah, yeah. So that's where this all
• 9:55
  started. So yeah, there was a snake show
• 9:58
  and they were doing the the snake thing and he let the snake
• 10:02
  crawl on this guy and the guy had bit him and so he died.
• 10:05
  He. Died, he died.
• 10:06
  It was a 57 or a 57 year old guy.
• 10:09
  It's called some performance. But like basically they let him
• 10:13
  on there and the snake, the snake charmer that they had was
• 10:17
  a cobra. It was a cobra.
• 10:19
  Cobra. Yeah, that's the only cool
• 10:21
  looking one when you snake charmer they're.
• 10:22
  Like the neck of love. And yeah, so I bit him and they
• 10:25
  tried to get him to the hospital, but he died so.
• 10:28
  See it like that kind of stuff, man.
• 10:30
  Like the Gator shows down in like Florida where they're like
• 10:33
  compared to Gator like, oh, we got this little baby tigers.
• 10:38
  You want to see it And it's just like, no, man, I don't want to
• 10:41
  see that. Like I don't I've seen a snake.
• 10:43
  I know what it looks like. Well, you've never seen one
• 10:45
  dance to a flu. I don't want.
• 10:47
  To I know some people, this guy did, that's what.
• 10:51
  YouTube is for you. Go neat and then I don't have to
• 10:53
  spend my money there anymore. Yeah, I don't know.
• 10:56
  It's one of those things you're in the culture.
• 10:58
  If I was walking by and there was this thing, I was like that
• 11:01
  guys make it a snake dance. Like I don't know if I would be
• 11:03
  going strictly. Wouldn't be front row?
• 11:06
  No, it's like, I wouldn't be like, oh, I gotta go see that.
• 11:08
  I'd be my distance and it's definitely not crawling on me.
• 11:11
  You, you. Nope.
• 11:13
  No thank you. That's a lawsuit.
• 11:14
  Who? You.
• 11:15
  Gonna sue? Yeah, A.
• 11:16
  Snake. Yeah, what are you?
• 11:18
  Oh, he did what snakes do, Yeah. Speaking of snakes, Shannon
• 11:24
  Elizabeth is on Onlyfans. Oh yeah, and it's making a lot
• 11:28
  of older males snakes happy. So Shannon Elizabeth, obviously
• 11:33
  the very attractive woman who was in the American Pie, that's
• 11:36
  where she really got famous. She was the was she like the
• 11:39
  Russian exchange student? I forget which nationality.
• 11:42
  She was Russian. She was she Russian, It was
• 11:44
  Nadia or whatever. And like she takes off her top
• 11:47
  of that and like people lose their mind and like she was
• 11:49
  super, super hot. So now she's on all lengths.
• 11:51
  She recently divorced. I wanted to get your opinion on
• 11:54
  this first. I want to go.
• 11:57
  Yeah. When's Jennifer Lapua getting on
• 11:58
  there? I'm in.
• 11:59
  I'm in second. Yeah, OK.
• 12:02
  From a like to have a discussion about it.
• 12:05
  Sure. She is in her 50s.
• 12:08
  Sure. And recently got divorced,
• 12:11
  signed the papers next day started only fans.
• 12:14
  OK. What do you think?
• 12:16
  What what are your thoughts on that as a woman and as a
• 12:20
  marriage and family therapist? What do you think?
• 12:21
  What do you think? What are you?
• 12:23
  Her mindset is. Well, I don't.
• 12:24
  I couldn't possibly tell you what her mind.
• 12:26
  But that's why. But I say get that bag, honey.
• 12:28
  Oh no. For.
• 12:29
  Sure. Like, I mean, you're gonna, if
• 12:31
  you're gonna make money, like are you from your questioning,
• 12:35
  it's like, it's almost this implication of like somehow this
• 12:37
  will lead to the divorce or like, no, she's.
• 12:39
  Been wanting to. Do this and now this is like her
• 12:41
  free. Yeah.
• 12:42
  Like I'm divorced and I'm free, that kind of thing.
• 12:44
  That's what I feel like. It is like she was like I'm out
• 12:46
  of this relationship that kept me enclosed and now I'm free.
• 12:50
  Maybe. I mean, it's common.
• 12:53
  No, I mean, but I haven't I'm a marriage and family fairs.
• 12:57
  But so when I see people, it's they're trying to work it out.
• 12:59
  Yes. So like I don't see them at the
• 13:01
  end where like I see them post divorce, like I'm there when
• 13:05
  they go, I think this isn't going to work out and I go, OK,
• 13:08
  so we're not booking a session next week and they go no, I
• 13:11
  never see the aftermath. Well, that's.
• 13:12
  A shit I. Have no idea.
• 13:14
  Like a lot of these couples, like it's like I don't even know
• 13:16
  if they're together anymore. I have no idea.
• 13:18
  So I mean it. I've heard of like divorce
• 13:22
  parties and like people throwing themselves like epic style, like
• 13:26
  Bachelorette type of things and like kind of Girls Gone Wild
• 13:30
  esque type of adventures in Vegas.
• 13:32
  And it's just like if that's what you need, you know, that's
• 13:35
  fine. If it feels like a freedom, if
• 13:37
  it feels like it, that's fine with me.
• 13:39
  Like it's fine for the guy if he wants to do it too.
• 13:41
  Yeah, she made $1,000,000 in the first week.
• 13:43
  A. $1,000,000. Which I was.
• 13:47
  I was curious, like it's all people my age.
• 13:49
  It's got to be, it's got to be. There's no 22 year old that's
• 13:52
  like Shannon, this is very hard. Unless he's recently watched
• 13:56
  American Pie, right? It's like, oh.
• 13:57
  Well, she's old. He's like, I can't wait to see
• 13:59
  that at 50. Like, no, I mean, yeah, like
• 14:02
  it's all you guys. Yeah, it's us cuz that's but and
• 14:05
  then we've seen it. So that's why I feel like if
• 14:08
  Jennifer Love Hewitt did it, we may she'd.
• 14:10
  Be well, but only fans is also like it's you can private
• 14:15
  message and you could pay for things separately and so you can
• 14:18
  make meal wheels and deals right.
• 14:20
  And so you can ask for specific things so she can hold up
• 14:23
  today's paper. I know and and say your name at
• 14:25
  the same time. And it's like, yeah, pretty
• 14:28
  much. So like, that's pretty much of
• 14:29
  it. But she's saying that that's
• 14:30
  basically what she's she's not saying she's not doing that.
• 14:33
  Well, that's exactly what she's. Doing she's like, it's only
• 14:35
  fans, you know? That's how you make your money.
• 14:37
  I know like, but she could just be scantily clad, you know what
• 14:41
  I mean? Like a lot of people do that you
• 14:43
  can see. That.
• 14:43
  Through the Internet. I know, but that's what people
• 14:46
  are paying for and. Would you join Only Fans if we
• 14:48
  got divorced? No, if it would.
• 14:51
  Do you feel like I'm holding you back?
• 14:54
  In no, I mean would. You start doing something like
• 14:56
  what would your? Divorce.
• 14:57
  Oh, yeah, I'm going to go right to the strip club.
• 14:59
  Like, look at me. I'm wearing a sweater right now
• 15:02
  that says homebody on it. Like, do you think I'm going to
• 15:04
  leave my house for anything other than like, I work for a
• 15:08
  living? That's what I do.
• 15:10
  I know, but you're not going to celebrate.
• 15:11
  Now, like I told you this the other day, like I don't, I need
• 15:14
  you. I know that, yeah.
• 15:15
  That's why you're. Not holding me back from
• 15:17
  anything like and that and that this is my message for guys.
• 15:20
  And this is the the thesis of what I was telling Nick the
• 15:22
  other night. Like y'all better be start to be
• 15:25
  real fun to be around because US women are have taken over.
• 15:30
  We are the number one owner of houses like we're the number one
• 15:33
  selling of like single family houses.
• 15:35
  We we buy them as single women, like we are the most educated.
• 15:40
  We are graduating from college at like, stellar rates.
• 15:43
  Amount of, Yeah, the amount of women becoming doctors and
• 15:46
  having advanced degrees far suppresses men.
• 15:48
  We're becoming more and more prevalent in the CEO workforce.
• 15:51
  We still have some work to do. Like, you guys better start
• 15:54
  smiling more like you're not holding us back from anything
• 15:59
  anymore. Whatever we want to do, we're
• 16:00
  doing it because we're sick of asking for permission.
• 16:03
  We're just taking at this. Point I When I set out to find
• 16:06
  the one whom I would marry, I wanted someone who didn't need
• 16:09
  me. And I found you.
• 16:11
  You don't need me. And so that's that works.
• 16:13
  And we're going to raise a daughter that doesn't need.
• 16:16
  Anybody. Yeah.
• 16:16
  I like having you around. Yeah, but the minute I don't,
• 16:20
  you better Start learning a new skill like juggling.
• 16:23
  Or like, you better find a way to entertain me, Ponyboy.
• 16:25
  You better get a job. Yeah, the clock is.
• 16:28
  Ticking. Well, thank you guys for
• 16:29
  watching and I'll see you in the next episode.
• 16:32
  Don't forget to like, subscribe and tell all your friends.