Latest / DA CREW Podcast / SEASON 2 DA CREW PODCAST_EPISODE _51 _ HOST TRIVEDA HARRIS

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SEASON 2 DA CREW PODCAST_EPISODE _51 _ HOST TRIVEDA HARRIS · DA CREW Podcast

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Hey, and welcome to another episode of The Proof I can. I am
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your visionary Queen Angela. And if you are a diva that's looking to amplify
0:14
your voice and you're looking for a whole, we have faith for you.
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Come on over and join Gim Diva up ye always and amplify your voice.
0:28
A nursing nursing me all things at what they used to be. Where has
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all the blue sky's foot boys miss the blues from the north something well,
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nursing urs me all things and what they used to know. Dallas Fort Worth,
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Dallas Fort Worth A A L A C. The Chance of your Dream
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Book Tour and Expo is coming to your area. Mark your calendars. May
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at Wings of Transformation Public. I agree, Queen. I think Queen I
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can blame Queen. I an three queen. It was the sweet, sweet
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sweet, No, it was the sweet good evening. And welcome to Believe
3:50
in the Journey podcast where I am your host, Trevida Harris, and I
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thank you guys for tuning in tonight. I have a wonderful guest tonight,
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Ms. Barbara Missus Bobby Farino, and we're going to be talking about going
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from hurt and to forgiveness because this is a lot of times that we carry
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so much in our hearts that we don't want to forgive, not even others,
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but we don't even want to forgive ourselves. So I think this is
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a topic that we need to discuss and learn how to go from hurt and
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to forgiven and to forgive. So you know, I can't go to anybody
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or anything without going to God first. So let's go to God and talk
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to him and then we'll get started. Dear Heavenly, Fatherly, thank you
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for bringing us together as you do each and every time we're in front of
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you. Let the ears who are listening, let them take away whatever they
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need from this show tonight. Let them understand that they can open their hearts
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and forgive and not carry on that baggage that they've been holding on to because
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it's weighing them down. Let them know that it is okay to let go,
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and that you will them in the areas of which they need to be
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filled. And your precious and holy name Jesus, I pray Amen. Now,
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as I said, we're going to bring up my guest MS. Bobby
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Forarino, and we're gonna talk about going from her to forgiveness. But before
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we do that, I would like you to introduce yourself and tell us a
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little bit about you. Well, sure, Hi, everybody, I'm Bobby
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Farino, and I work with people's self concept and part of that is helping
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them to forgive. We think our problem is out there. Our problem is
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not out there. There's no problem out there. Things just are. They
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are not this or that. They just are. But we have an opportunity
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every moment to be in love with being alive. This is a gift.
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It only lasts a little while. So while we're here, we cannot hold
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a grudge against ourselves. We cannot be out of forgiveness for ourselves, because
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then we're coming. It's like putting on glasses colored glasses and we're seeing our
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own being from a level of unforgiveness. People say the worst things to themselves
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tributed and never use the word against ourselves ever. Ever. So this is
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the work that I do with people, and I help shift them into their
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own power. And it is my greatest joy, my greatest pleasure in my
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life to see somebody start to love themselves again. It is just the most
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thrilling experience to watch a person come alive and let go of all of this
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that we think we have to carry. And that's true. I was talking
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to one of my coworkers today actually about carrying the burdens of someone else,
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like we carry other people's burdens because we want what's best for them, and
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we have to learn how to let go of what doesn't belong to us,
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you know. Learning to forgive ourselves, I think is the hardest thing for
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most of us, because we want to hold on to what has hurt us
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because it's easier than to let go and start that healing process. So we
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hold on to it so tight because it's familiar as well, you know exactly.
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Hurt is familiar in so many ways, in so many areas. What
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has been one of the things that you struggled with that made you hold on
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to a little bit of the hurt for longer than you should have. Well,
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in my life, I don't know that I've ever really held onto anything
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for an Okay. I just somehow seem to have a lot of grace in
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my life and I can forgive Okay. Example, one of the things that
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started me on this path was was an awful event that happened to me when
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I was seventeen. I was very innocent and very naive, and I didn't
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know anything about, you know, being in love with somebody having sex,
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so I knew nothing. I was just like this little naive girl and I
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was gang raped at seventeen, and it was it was absolutely it was an
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unbelievable experience. I mean I was on just such overwhelmed. I mean it.
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And it's a funny thing because I don't want the focus to go to
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the rape. I want the focus the forgiveness, because I was right to
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forgive them. I made a choice to forgive those people, right I you
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know, and these days, if it does come up and I do think
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about it, I bless them because I can't. I know, people will
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say, why would you do that? But when I am inside myself.
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I have an intrinsic understanding that when people know better, they do better.
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True people act out of unconsciousness, They act out of some misguided need for
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power or whatever they're doing, and then people hurt one another. When this
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happened to me, I made that decision that I did not want to hold
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on to this, because I do it would stop me from feeling the love
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and the kindness and the mercy in my own heart. I needed first merciful
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with myself, and then I could be merciful with others. So I just
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I let go of that experience. I let go of that. And you
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know that experience did not color my life, nor did it define me.
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What defines me is how I look at life, my love for this gift
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of life, and my creator who put this amazing power inside of me,
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that every breath that I breathe, I can be conscious of him. If
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I choose, I can be conscious of that power, and I can be
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in forgiveness. At any moment. I can decide if somebody says something to
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me and it's not true of me, and I know it's not true,
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why would I hold onto that I don't want to have a grievance against anybody.
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I'm not poisoning them, I'm poisoning me. Why would I? So
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we can just let go and be in the flow, just like we do
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with the breath that goes up and down. So easily thinks about breathing.
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Oh yeah, I breathe, But we're unconscious at night and that breath is
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still flowing there. Yeah, very true. True. And the creator is
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so perfect. He created an amazing world for us that is so beautiful and
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put us in it. Not only as a flower beautiful, but it has
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a scent it gives. Yes, you crush a flower, the scent is
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even more really yes, So what happened to us we can look at them
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as a blessing. That experience in my life when I was seventeen turned into
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a blessing for me. It opened me up to great, great, great
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compassion. It allowed me to feel and to understand that those men acted out
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of someplace inside of them that was left. It didn't have anything to do
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with me, right, even though I physically was what they were focusing on.
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Right, I saw that was a physical thing. I can definitely relate
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to that, and I can honestly say that I had an experience similar to
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that. It was my first boyfriend had I was naive as well, I
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really you know, first boyfriend, not really, and it was an abusive
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relationship as well. I was fourteen, and you know, I could be
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angry about that situation, but I realized where he came from and the things
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that he saw, and that was the household that he grew up in.
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So those were the mannerisms that he pretty much entailed. And I don't hate
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him to this day. Of course, my brother and everybody wanted to kill
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him, but they and they still do. But as I've told them,
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I'm over that part because I could have carried that hate, I could have
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carried that anger, I could have carried that bitterness. But what would be
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the point of me being angry and carrying that bitterness around with me and not
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learning to let that go Because that had to do with him and it had
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nothing to do with me. Absolutely, And you know, I think I've
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looked at life in so many ways when I've gone through something where someone has
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hurt me and be like, Okay, whatever they're going through, I was
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the target for them to release it. But I don't have to carry it
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because it's not my burden to carry. And I think that's one of the
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things that has allowed me to be able to forgive people but know how to
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still be cordial and you know, pray for them, but keep my distance
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from them at the same time to hang out with them, but right the
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forgiveness releases us from a judgment that we hold for another. Sometimes that prison's
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judgment is the one we hold for ourselves, telling ourselves stupid, we're bad,
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we're this. I don't have a talent and I can't offer anything into
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the world. What can I do? It's not true. When we listen
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to falsehood, we take this identity. This is not meant to be the
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master this mind. The mind is worked, and when we can quiet the
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mind down, there's something else going on underneath the mind, and it's a
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very peaceful feeling. And when we decide in that feeling, then we have
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clarity. And that means just in this moment called now now, power is
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not yesterday in the past, and not tomorrow in the future. Now.
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We want to be present to all of our energy every year in the moment
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because we cannot be clear, nor can we make a decision from clarity.
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If we're all over the place that's refusion comes in. So why hold on
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to a feeling that makes me contracted and small and yeah, you know,
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and fills me with the total opposite, not the total opposite of love,
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but the absence of love, because like darkness, you can't bring darkness into
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a lit room because it's not oppressed. It's right of light, So it's
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not it's nothing. Yeah, what we choose to feel in our lives makes
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all the difference in our living. You know. I don't want to walk
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around and be open to this and that and everything. I want to just
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be clear. In my life. I always seem to wind up meeting amazingly
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beautiful people. I just am so graced in my life. I just you
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know, I live, I live a really extraordinary life. In twenty seventeen,
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I think it was twenty seventeen. Between twenty seventeen and twenty eighteen,
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I lost about six friends and family members, my father, brother in law,
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my brother in law, and in twenty seventeen I lost my husband,
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who was the love of my life, the absolute love of my life.
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It was very different and without my faith and without my trust and without entering
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into the quiet within me. I don't know how much I've made it through.
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But all of those things built my compassion, built, my pagon built,
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my love, built, my commitment, my integrity. Everything that happens
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to us in our lives is for our use, because I make a choice
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in how we look at that. And when an open heart and open eyes
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we begin to see the gifts. We may not see them right away.
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Sometimes we do. Sometimes we don't sure what mean. They don't happen,
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They're offered freely to us. Look, there's no mistake. When God made
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everything, he did not make a missay or did he make jump. He
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made power that he instilled within us, a power to love, to be
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compassionate, to offer the people to live in His grace, and also to
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let go. We decide that is the difference between a human being and an
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animal. We have this free will. Nobody can do anything. We may
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let go. Sometimes when that voice comes in your head, it sounds like
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you it's not that's true, Like it's oh, you're so stupid. Why
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didn't you do that right? Look at you. You're such an idiot.
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Oh my god, I'm so crazy, I'm so stupid. No, we
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cannot use word against us or against anyone else. Right. And as Black
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Diamond says, some people love to live in their heart because it because their
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best friend. And that's true. They do live to they love to stay
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connected to that heart because it also gets them the attention that they're seeking,
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you know, and that sympathy and everything. Like, I have this rule
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in my house, and I've had this rule since my kids were young,
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and I didn't realize that it was a rule that we're allowed our pity parties,
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but there's a time limit on our pity parties. And when I got
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sick the second time in twenty thirteen, where I had a major flair with
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my condition and I lost my speech and I was having some localized seizures on
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one side of my body, and my kids were just really happy and you
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know, just being kids, and my house is happy and it's fun.
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You're always gonna laugh when you're here because we don't know anything outside of being
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silly. And so I was going through that and I was like, it
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frustrated me in a sense of what are you y' all so happy about?
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The doctors can't tell me what's going on. And my son said to me,
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and I had said this to him when he was about seven years old.
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He was thirteen at this time, and he said, My, the
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thing of it is, we're this way because you taught us to be this
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way. And you have the power to decide which of your feelings you want
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to dedicate the most time to. Do you want to be sad? Do
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you want to be mad or do you want to be angry? Or do
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you want to be happy? Whichever one you decide gets the most of your
19:33
energy and your attention. So it's your choice. But this is what you
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told me, So what are you going to do? And all I can
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do was say, yeah, he brought it right back to you. When
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I was like, you're absolutely right. So I sat down on couch.
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I had my little pity party for about thirty minutes, and I said,
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Okay, God, I thank you for bringing my child back to give me
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what I had given to him, because you know, when they're seven years
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old, you don't really think that they're listening to you. But he brought
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it back to me at thirteen, so it made me. You know,
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that was at aha moment he did hear me. It wasn't like he wasn't
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listening. But I feel like we choose to stay in what brings us peace
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and comfort, so to speak. And if you stay and you get up
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and get dressed and get dressed for your pity party, you're gonna stay there,
20:30
You're gonna keep gwallowing in that because you find some kind of comfort there.
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I've never been one to stay stationary or stay in a space to where
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it's like, Okay, this is comfortable, but I want to move people.
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They're pain is familiar to that, and then yeah, and sometimes they
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don't realize that they have choice. People don't understand that and change what they
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believe became handed down, sometimes generationally, sometimes just our own family that we
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have now grew up in. But it doesn't mean that we have to own
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that and believe that in the rest of our lives we can take that concept.
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You know, I speak. I speak beautifully to myself all the time
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and lovingly to myself all the time. I'm always speaking affirmatively, and it
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empowers me so that I have clarity to do the things do and to let
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go when I need to let go. We have to. I feel like
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people sometimes want to stay where they feel that most comfort, but also you
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got to give yourself permission to have a different dialogue with yourself. And if
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you're willing to have a different dialogue with yourself, you'll understand that you can
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speak to yourself in a most positive way. And when you speak to yourself
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in a positive way, you begin to let go of things that are not
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sad and not holding you in that one space. We can get out of
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anything that we want in this life if we start to speak to ourselves in
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a more positive way. And I've had people tell so many stories on me,
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so now I just look at it when somebody comes to me and say
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something about, you know, the old version of me, and I'm like,
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okay, so you're on season two, episode twelve, Okay, finish
22:33
your story and let me see where you are so that I can keep updated
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on what it is that you feel about me, because I'm not that same
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person anymore. And if that's the season that you walked in or walked out
22:47
of, that has that's your season. But I don't know anything about that.
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But since you're keeping me updated on the season, let me know what
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it is that I still need to work on. And they're like, well,
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what do you mean by that like, I don't know that old person
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anymore, so that hurt that I was holding on to it's no longer here.
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So you see me in a different space and you're upset about something that
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happened when we were twelve years old. I don't even remember that. But
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since you're still holding on to it, let me know when you catch up
23:25
to Season two, episode twelve, and then we can talk. Yes,
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exactly, good for you, that's right. You know, there's so many
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different ways that we can stop our self talk when it's name. You know.
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I'm going to offer this little tip. I used to teach this and
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all my I still teach it and individually Errol readings and classes. When you
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hear your mind speaking to you, when that voice, if it's not making
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you feel good, just see it as a red light. Let go on,
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you know, immediately change that. Just turn it around and speak the
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opposite if you're saying, if your head is saying, oh, you're so
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stupid, you can't even do that? Right? No, I do everything
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perfectly because God is in the back of me. Yes, turn it around.
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God guides me, My superior power shows me where to be. That's
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a green light. So you need that red light to a green light statement.
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Also, writing affirmations so beneficial. When you write them, you're engaging,
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you speak them as you're writing them. You're engaging full body sense of
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energy into what you It becomes natural to say I'm beautiful, I'm kind,
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I'm gracious, I'm powerful, I'm everything as I am. That's with a
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power being. So there's to forgive. There's only something for us to rect
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nice and that is a perfect whole and complete, exactly as we are.
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Every day I use this application and it says I am happy, healthy,
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wealthy, well and hope it covers everything, and it's it does, and
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it's powerful. Every morning I run five miles, so the whole time I'm
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running, you know, and I'm I'm I mean, I look kind of
25:29
young for my age, but I'm actually I'm seventy seven, so no,
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wait, I don't know how so see you definitely don't look seventy seven at
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all. And I never remember whether it's it's like, oh, that is
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true. I thought I was the only one because I look at myself in
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the mirror and I'm like, okay, how am I? How old am
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I? Really? Because I don't look like the typical forty five year old
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in my opinion, and so I have to I'm like, okay, how
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old in my turning because my driver's license says this, but I don't look
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like that, So yeah, I get that. Yeah, I had another
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question to ask you, But now that we were talking about that, I
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don't even remember what the question. The affirmations. Yes, I think that's
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a really good thing to do because I do that in the mornings and if
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I'm thinking about something, I'll write it down. And this is something that
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happened yesterday, like yesterday morning, well yesterday, and itself was a whole
26:37
I don't know what was going on. I was. I work in the
26:38
medical field, so that's that's a whole nother ballgame there. But I had
26:45
said my prayer on my way to work, and you know, God is
26:48
going to send a test in that situation. So I had prayed for a
26:53
peaceful, non eventful day. That's not what happened yesterday. And I was
27:02
like, Okay, God, I don't know what was going on, but
27:07
I received the confirmation of what I prayed. And so this morning on my
27:11
way to work, I was like, God, I saw what you did
27:17
when I was praying for a peaceful day. You help me to recognize those
27:22
areas in which I still need work. So I thank you for yesterday,
27:29
and it's prepared me for today. And so it was one of those moments
27:33
where I's like, girl, you ain't got there yet, but it's okay.
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So yesterday all is forgiven, All is well. You learn some things
27:44
and you learn something about yourself in that space that you're not in. You're
27:48
not completely over the short temper, but you are in a space to where
27:56
you can control your speak when someone's being rude and disrespectful, you know.
28:03
And that was an AHA moment this morning, and it was like, Okay,
28:07
I forgive myself for not being all my best behavior yesterday. But I
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wasn't all my worst behavior either, but I knew that there were some things
28:15
that I probably could have handled a little differently. So I had to forgive
28:18
myself this morning for what my behavior was yesterday. And you did, just
28:25
forget yourself. It's okay because we're it's okay. Yeah, mistakes. I
28:29
had to realize that it's okay to cry and to do that. It's fine,
28:34
you know, because it's not gonna last forever. And I would like,
28:38
you know, push those feelings away because I didn't want to, you
28:42
know, be crying and feeling sad or feeling because I was judging I was
28:48
doing. I had a lot of judgment for myself. Yeah, and that
28:52
is the worst thing that we can do to ourselves. We don't need to
28:55
judge ourselves. I mean I didn't say, well, I don't think you're
28:59
as good as they, so you can live you you're done. I mean,
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he doesn't do that. See. Lets everybody have life, just like
29:04
the sun shines all of us, not just some of us. So when
29:10
we forgive ourselves, we move into this love and compassion that we have inside
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naturally that has been there by by the keeper of our spirits and souls.
29:22
Yeah, and when it's when we get in touch with that, life starts
29:26
to become really beautiful. Because we're not making it beautiful by what we buy,
29:32
what we have, a new car, a new new husband, more
29:36
money and other job and other house. No, we're being fulfilled the inside
29:41
out. There isn't a peace going on inside of us that is beyond the
29:45
thoughts m hm, so deep inside that as we let go and we open
29:53
up to what life has to offer to us. We find that we stay
29:57
focused in the moment, that moment, there's a clarity and that comes from
30:03
feeling an inner piece because the head's not talking, talking, talking. How
30:08
to get to that? To find that inner piece is a human beings and
30:14
it's really in the world which find we have to, Yeah, find somebody,
30:19
let's access that I did need in life. And I meditate every day
30:26
from anywhere from an hour to two hours, and I just don't listen to
30:33
my head. You know, people wake up in the morning. All of
30:36
us have experienced this. I'm not God. I got to do this,
30:38
and then right away everything start to do list. Yeah, to do list
30:44
starts. Yeah, and it's inside of us. We just keep adding and
30:47
adding and adding to it. We don't have to if we pay attention to
30:51
one thing we're doing right now. And this is not like burying your head
30:53
in the stand and not paying attention to what's going on. Rather, it's
30:59
paying more attention to what's going on because you're focused moment, when you're focused
31:03
in the that race car driver on that on that racetrack. Yeah, somebody
31:10
he thinks he's doing it because he loves racing parts. You know, why
31:12
he's doing it the same reason skar skiing. You have to be focused in
31:17
that moment where you're gonna be off that mountain and off that racetrack you're gonna
31:21
yeah, I mean your physician, you need to focus here now. And
31:26
yeah, so much joy and so much power and so much peace because this
31:33
moment called now it's amazing. So we do anything we can to give us
31:40
a rush. And rush is about being in the moment. You smoke cigarettes,
31:45
it's not that it's the tobacco. They're inhaling, so they're paying attention
31:52
mm hmmm with their breath in that moment. It's all about something pulling.
31:59
This is our You can't a breath, living breath into a body, not
32:06
a living breath. Only want do that And yes, yes, and that
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energy is inside of us, that energy of God, of that generator operator
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and director inside. Yeah. And we're meant to forgive. We're mean,
32:25
we're not meant to have revenge and to feel happiness that comes to though that
32:32
it's harmful. We're drinking poison, not the other person. Yeah. I
32:38
think forgiveness is hard because people oftentimes think that it's for the other person,
32:45
but the other person has not even thought about the hurt that they caused you.
32:52
So they're walking, they're going to bed every night, they're not doing
32:57
anything that is hindering them from living their lives. And so people like,
33:02
well, I'm not gonna forgive them, Well why won't you forgive them?
33:06
Because you're carrying that, you're holding onto that, and you would feel so
33:12
much freer and so much lighter. And I can honestly say, like,
33:15
I lost my mom last June and it's coming up on a year. And
33:23
in my mom, we didn't have a great relationship, but all of the
33:29
things that my mom went through I had. As I got older, I
33:34
realized that my mom was carrying a lot of hurt herself and she didn't understand
33:38
how to let that hurt go. And even though I wasn't the one that
33:44
caused a lot of her hurt, I know, as a kid, I'm
33:46
gonna call some hurt because you know, we're growing up, we're learning,
33:50
you know, you're just going through life, but you're getting there. But
33:54
I was able to forgive her for not being there and for not being the
34:00
mom that I thought I needed or the one that I wanted her to be.
34:07
But the revelation that I've had since her passing and me being with her
34:12
her final months and everything is the fact that she was the mom that I
34:17
needed so that I can become the mom that I wanted my children to be
34:22
to have, and teaching her that love she didn't have to work for love
34:30
for me or from people who genuinely cared about her, and love was not
34:36
painful if it was coming from a genuine place, and I had to let
34:43
her know that all was forgiven. I didn't hold any grudges. I wasn't
34:46
angry with her because of the life that she lived and the decisions that she
34:51
made. And that was very, very freeing for me. But I had
34:54
done it a long time ago. But I was able to have her in
34:59
a space to where I could tell her and I could see the relief and
35:06
I guess you could say, the shame that she probably felt. I could
35:08
see that just removed from her. And that was a really great experience and
35:15
moment that I shared with her before she you know, transitioned to go to
35:21
the other side. But you know, I knew that she carried that for
35:25
a long time. She carried that hurt. Yeah, that's for you that's
35:30
a I did. Yeah to my older sister. She didn't like me all
35:36
my life, some really pretty awful things to me. My older sisters didn't
35:39
know. One was there was a big difference in me. And she thinks
35:45
I'm lying about it, but I'm not. And she she didn't, she
35:49
didn't. I never said anything. I just never said anything. But I
35:52
don't think she's great. But at the end, Uh, she she had
35:57
cancer and my husband I just took our savings and savings to pay for her.
36:05
So we just took our sitting did that. And then I got an
36:08
opportunity to sit with her and I realized because when she was a teenager,
36:15
she got pregnant and got married my dad. We were military. We he
36:19
got ordered to move to Hawaii. We just up and left her with a
36:22
brand new her mother, her sisters because she was married without orders to leave,
36:30
and that was really hurt her. I I got the opportunity to talk
36:37
to her about them, and at the end we helped and I was so
36:42
grateful. Yeah, it was very precious. Yeah, I hold no animosity
36:50
against anybody. And yeah, and somebody had just posted her last I think
36:57
she just posted that she's terrible off talk with herself and you don't have to
37:05
let me. Let me tell everybody a really powerful little thing to do.
37:08
I know it's not people to do, but if you do it, stand
37:14
in front of mirror and just look into your eyes like this and just say
37:17
I love you. You are beautiful, You're so whole. You are divine.
37:23
You are divine, You are a divine being. You are the highest
37:29
of the high. You are filled with grace, mercy, and compassion,
37:34
and every day you grow closer and closer to your God. You are divine.
37:38
You are a blessing, and I'm a blessing to myself. I love
37:43
who I am. I love you, Bobby when it just flows right out.
37:47
So it's just a little step that you take, just even to look
37:52
into the mirror into your eyes with love. You don't have to say anything
37:55
at first, but you can, and using ice, he smooth the conversation.
38:02
Yeah, it's perfect, that's definitely. And you have to be able
38:09
to self talk to yourself every morning. And that's one of the things that
38:15
I've learned to do for myself when I'm having a moment is to go and
38:20
stand in front of my mirror and tell myself what it is that I'm proud
38:24
of, and I'm learning to forgive myself for not not stepping outside of my
38:32
comfort zone a little bit more than what I had because I'm I'm really a
38:37
shy person, I really am, and so learning how to step outside of
38:43
my shadow and step in front of things. So I have to tell myself,
38:47
I'm proud of you. You've did this, even though someone told you
38:52
you couldn't. You've done this. Embrace it, you know. I'm still
38:55
learning how to do that, And I'm still learning how not to deflect compliments
39:01
and things of that nature, because it's like, eh, I don't really
39:07
quite know how to receive them, but I don't know how to just be
39:15
with them when they're given to me and I'm like, okay, well,
39:21
thank you, I appreciate that. Or if somebody tells me, you know,
39:24
that outfit looks really cute, I'll deflect that onto something else. But
39:30
being able to tell a person that you've had a falling out with or a
39:37
disagreement with, being able to have a conversation because life is really too short,
39:44
you know, we only get a certain amount of days and nights here
39:47
on this side, and walking around holding onto those grudges, get to that
39:52
person, reach out and even if they don't want to hear from you,
39:57
even if they don't want to hear what you have to say, extend that
40:01
grace so that they know that you're still not holding on you're not upset.
40:07
And even if you have to write it down, mail it to him,
40:09
or write it down and you know, put it in the atmosphere, whatever
40:14
you need to do, get that weight and that burden off of you and
40:19
just let it go because it's gonna hinder you from receiving everything that you're supposed
40:25
to receive. I'm really big on that. If you're holding on to something
40:30
that God is trying to tell you to let go of and let him have
40:34
it, let him deal with it. You can't receive what he's trying to
40:38
give you because your hands and stuff are too full because you're holding onto everything
40:44
that hurts you. Let it go so that he can replace and he's gonna
40:49
replace it with something more than you could have ever imagined. So let them
40:53
stuff go. I'm real big on that. I was just telling my coworker
40:59
that today that is that's and and I see I hope I don't correctly so
41:08
I think her name is it's a beautiful name. And DD just just call
41:14
he d D so pretty and she does. Then she said, it's okay
41:21
to cry. You can look in the mirror and tell yourself I love you
41:23
when you're great person and cry. Crying washes us out. It's a release.
41:31
You gotta do it every once in a while. It's good for us
41:35
because it puts us back in with our heart mm hmm, human being,
41:40
to be not in touch with yeah, touch who we are and we're for
41:45
ourselves. We have so much and we find that are literally fed and exhaustible
41:52
supply of good of you, just an abundance of a verity of health,
41:59
of every thing, everything can be, that can be, everything is already,
42:06
Yes, receive it. Start with gratitude. Morning, just with gratitude.
42:13
Gratitude Is that all ills? Yeah? And when we wake up in
42:21
the morning and we gratitude, we set the day. Yeah, eyes are
42:27
even open. I always want to be gratitude. We have to be thankful
42:34
for all It requires from us. Focus off of what we don't, which
42:38
is black, and what we do have. We all know we're energy flows,
42:45
so creating. But you're speaking, you're thinking and the actions you're taking.
42:51
I think that we feel act we need to make so that that we
42:58
think and love and that yeah, planning that I feel like if you plan
43:07
a small little seed of happiness, because everything starts with a small gesture,
43:17
a small little thing, and it begins to grow and blossom. Even the
43:22
negativity, if you have a little bit of negativity, if you continue to
43:28
go with the negative and surround yourself with the negative, that is what snowballs
43:32
into this big old thing. And now you're just engulfed in negativity and you're
43:37
trying to figure out how to get away. Start planning that one little seed
43:43
every single time you want to think about something bad, a positive seed.
43:50
After a while, you have more positive than negative, and then you look
43:53
around you like, oh, well, I'm happy here, I'm happy there,
43:57
I'm happy this, and you don't have the those bad thoughts anymore.
44:01
I mean, there might come up every once in a while, but they're
44:05
not as overwhelming as they were when you started planning those things. And one
44:08
thing that I can say every morning before I get out of my bed,
44:12
I thank God for being able to move and being able to, you know,
44:16
start this day, because I could have been, you know, that
44:21
could have been the last day, you know, And so I thank him
44:24
before I even get out of the bed, and I thank him when I'm
44:29
getting up, getting ready to go brush my teeth, to get ready for
44:31
work and everything. I thank him for that as well, because he could
44:37
have decided to bring me home. I don't know my time, women,
44:40
I don't know my expiration date. And one thing I always tell people,
44:45
celebrate each moment and each day, because we're not going to be here to
44:50
celebrate our ending date, but our family members will be. And the thing
44:54
of that is we don't know that date, but we pass our death date
44:59
every single day that we're still here, so that date will become familiar to
45:02
those who are left behind to honor us. So what do you want your
45:08
days in between to be remembered as? Because if you don't have anything positive
45:16
that you can leave here with somebody, that dash that's in the middle means
45:21
absolutely nothing, because you've carried so much hate and anger and everything, and
45:27
you've pushed that off on everybody else. And I hear people often say,
45:30
well, I came in this world by myself, and I'm going to die
45:32
by myself. Well, Number one You didn't come in this world by yourself.
45:36
You were surrounded by people who loved and cared about you. And if
45:39
you lived with life according to what God has planned for you, you'll die
45:45
with somebody who loves you and carris you by your side as well. So
45:50
those are things that I just say for myself. I don't know if anybody
45:52
else thinks that way, but I feel like that is the best way to
45:58
be when it comes to life and death. And death is that beautiful lie
46:02
that we never really talk about, but we have this. It's an end.
46:07
There is an end where we're not going to be here forever. So
46:10
understand what you are doing now. It's beneficial. Don't carry hurt into your
46:19
next moment, and don't carry hatred into your next moment. Don't carry all
46:24
of those things because you're left to bleed on people who didn't hurt you.
46:30
You're left to have them fix whatever they didn't break, and it's not their
46:37
fault. So forgive yourself, number one, and forgive those who try to
46:42
hurt you. But they can never hurt you in a manner that breaks you
46:45
completely. If you keep God first, Yes, and when you keep that
46:51
first in your life, when you keep God, keep that powerful in your
46:54
life. You came that everything that happens to you there is a lesson and
47:04
anything that anybody may say you. When you know who you are, you
47:07
can easily see things that are not true because you and you just let them
47:15
look and you bless no matter what you no matter what you bless them,
47:22
you are feeling the blessing. And what you're putting out to the world that
47:27
you live in is this beautiful and this is the that the world needs in
47:32
order to change. Look, peace is not going on us boom and everybody.
47:40
Peace begins in every human being. Yeah, the way to access and
47:46
inner peace. But we have we have to desire that we have to have.
47:53
If we don't have a thirst business, kindness, aude, and mercy,
47:59
then we don't have a third want those things right follow our hearts.
48:06
When we when gratitude, we begin to know live all of this where we
48:14
live, who we're with so much to give. I see the highest and
48:20
the best in people, and that's probably one of the best I've ever had.
48:24
I can see right. They may see one mm hmm, that's not
48:30
I see the love and the beauty and innocence every y and I I talk
48:40
to people all day everywhere whenever I'm out, and I compliment them. I
48:45
mean, I can't help it. Help people have beautiful smile and life,
48:51
and it's just so beautiful to help people the happiness and sight. Yeah,
49:00
you give yourself. Yeah, what is one thing that you will leave with
49:05
our guests tonight about forgiveness? What's one tip that they can get themselves in
49:10
a place of peace when it comes to forgiveness. I would tonite this statement.
49:20
I forgive myself for all perceived errors and mistakes or actual errors and mistakes.
49:30
I forgive myself. Just say I forgive myself. Look in the mirror
49:35
and say I forgive myself, so I may forgive others just one sentence.
49:40
And if you do this repeatedly, you're going to see a change. And
49:45
I'm telling you this is true because I'm not telling you things that I don't
49:49
know aren't true. I have been the test because I've done these things.
49:55
Forgiveness is beauty. And what you are this amazing, amazing, strong,
50:05
powerful, loving human being, And all you have to do is accept that
50:10
identity because it's the truth. I'm not saying empty words. I'm telling you
50:16
the truth of your being. The work that I do with people is to
50:20
help them to see this, to feel this, to understand this, to
50:24
accept it. We don't have to change anything else. We can make that
50:28
one statement each day I forgive myself and then it doesn't mean you don't connect
50:36
with that immediately in your correct What happens is and you look in the saying
50:43
this to yourself. Eventually it justks like a shift is in the transformation place
50:50
and you become open. You allow yourself to love yourself. It's not hard.
50:57
The hard thing is making the decision. Because you think it's hard,
51:00
it's not. Well. I thank you so much for that, and I
51:06
thank you for being here with us tonight. You have really opened my eyes
51:12
to a different way of looking at letting go, because that's very, very
51:17
powerful and very important. I thank you for your time. I thank you
51:22
for being here and sharing your good words of wisdom, and we're going to
51:27
wrap it up. But before I wrap it up, I always have to
51:30
close with this one little line, and that is stay obedient to what God
51:35
has called you to do, because He doesn't need anything from you except for
51:38
to be obedient to what he's called you to do. Yes, ma'am so
51:44
much. Lovely speaking lovely, anybody can find you, that's where I am.
51:52
Yes, if you want to work your question, you want to just
51:57
check. And I love you so thank you for having me, thank you
52:07
for being here, and thank you for reaching out. You know, I'm
52:10
glad that you did reach out. I'm glad that we had this opportunity.
52:15
But like I was telling you earlier, I really am a firm believer in
52:19
God connecting people in the time in which they're supposed to meet, and I
52:24
am just really firm on that, and I'm glad that we had this opportunity
52:29
to do this. So you know, I'll definitely be keeping in touch and
52:34
you'll probably be back for another show episode. So thank you again for tuning
52:39
in, and I thank you guys for tuning in as well. Catch me
52:43
in about two weeks and we'll be doing this again. I love you,
52:47
guys, and have a great night. Hie everybody. It was the sweet,
53:06
sweet sweet name of Non