Latest / The Kathie Owen Perspective Podcast / 153. Heart-centered Leadership | Transform Your Team

Transcript

153. Heart-centered Leadership | Transform Your Team · The Kathie Owen Perspective Podcast

• 0:00
  Hey, I just wanted to jump in here real quick and tell you I've been missing from YouTube.
• 0:05
  I know.
• 0:06
  I haven't recorded a video in a few weeks.
• 0:09
  I've been making the pivot in my business and working on that.
• 0:12
  But here's my tip.
• 0:15
  I make flow a priority.
• 0:17
  I have for several years, and once I make flow a priority, I make that number one.
• 0:23
  And if it's not fun, I don't do it.
• 0:26
  So I've been taking a break, giving myself a break, taking some self care, and that's where I've been.
• 0:32
  So let's get back to the video.
• 0:36
  Kathie: In his book, Leaders Eat Last, Simon Sinek gives this awesome quote.
• 0:43
  Kathie: Leadership is not about being in charge.
• 0:46
  Kathie: Leadership is about taking care of those in your charge.
• 0:51
  Kathie: Yeah, that's what we're going to talk about today.
• 0:57
  Kathie: Taking care of those in your charge means a lot.
• 1:02
  Kathie: It's like being a parent.
• 1:04
  Kathie: You take care of your children and you're in charge of them at the same time.
• 1:10
  Kathie: And you use empathy and compassion.
• 1:13
  Kathie: You're not being in charge of everything that goes on in their world.
• 1:18
  Kathie: The other day I was walking through the hall of a company and I knew one of the top executives and she walked by me and I felt invisible.
• 1:29
  Kathie: Tell me, has this ever happened to you?
• 1:31
  Kathie: I get it.
• 1:32
  Kathie: She was probably stressed, had a mission to go on, but when you're walking through the hall of fame, what are you in charge of?
• 1:42
  Kathie: Please don't act like you're in charge, but take care of those you're in charge of.
• 1:54
  Kathie: I see this happen so many times.
• 1:56
  Kathie: It's easy to happen.
• 1:58
  Kathie: It's simple.
• 1:59
  Kathie: It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that we need to take care of those we're in charge of.
• 2:07
  Kathie: That defines me.
• 2:08
  Kathie: A true leader and some, someone that somebody wants to follow.
• 2:14
  Kathie: You don't want to follow the scowl face.
• 2:16
  Kathie: Why would you want to follow that person?
• 2:19
  Kathie: It's almost scary and you're in, in your thoughts, you may be thinking, this person doesn't care about me and what I'm trying to go through, even though it wasn't specifically said, it's picked up subconsciously.
• 2:40
  Kathie: When a leader takes care of those they're in charge of, they don't disrespect them when they walk in the office to ask them a question.
• 2:49
  Kathie: I've seen this happen as well.
• 2:52
  Kathie: Someone walked in the office to ask a question and I was already talking to this leader and the leader said, what do you want to the next person?
• 3:02
  Kathie: And I'm like, Poor person.
• 3:05
  Kathie: She already knew how to handle this situation.
• 3:07
  Kathie: She just said, I just wanted to say good morning.
• 3:11
  Kathie: That's all.
• 3:12
  Kathie: But she did need something.
• 3:14
  Kathie: But in fact, the leader was scowling.
• 3:17
  Kathie: She was angry about something.
• 3:20
  Kathie: She was bitter.
• 3:21
  Kathie: It's time to wash your hands of that and find a better way.
• 3:28
  Kathie: You're listening to Kathie's Coaching Podcast.
• 3:31
  Kathie: I'm your host, Kathie Owen.
• 3:33
  Kathie: Stay to the end because I have bloopers for you, or maybe I don't, I don't know.
• 3:38
  Kathie: We'll see when I start editing.
• 3:41
  Kathie: And also be sure to subscribe to my channel.
• 3:46
  Kathie: This is also on my podcast as well as on.
• 3:50
  Kathie: I'll have links to both of those in the show notes and description below, as well as I write a blog post that goes with the video.
• 3:59
  Kathie: You can check that out in the links below.
• 4:01
  Kathie: So today we're talking about leadership.
• 4:04
  Kathie: I am making a small pivot in my business where I'm going into corporate wellness consulting.
• 4:11
  Kathie: I have been a corporate wellness director for a company for 11 years and now I'm branching out to help others.
• 4:19
  Kathie: And so what I do is I will go into a company and I will analyze like an undercover boss.
• 4:26
  Kathie: I will see, Hey, what's going on here?
• 4:29
  Kathie: Just pretend like I'm an employee for the day and I will model what is going on inside the business.
• 4:36
  Kathie: And I will see how people work, why they're there, what's going on with the team, and pretty much It's just like being an undercover boss, but at the same time I'm trying to find where we can tweak things to make the employee feel better, make the team feel more like a culture, like a family, and it can happen.
• 5:01
  Kathie: It takes a simple shift in mindset from the team players to the leaders, especially the leaders, because that's where, like today, we're talking about the leaders fall into the self absorbed taking care of only themselves.
• 5:20
  Kathie: And that's the way it comes across, even though most likely that is not what is meant.
• 5:27
  Kathie: They come in, walk through the hallways, don't greet people even though they know them.
• 5:33
  Kathie: Like this happened to me the other day.
• 5:35
  Kathie: I'm like, and I've even had some of our managers, like my specific manager, just greet me with a hmm.
• 5:45
  Kathie: And unfortunately, or maybe I would say fortunately, I can read body language, I can read posture, I can read micro expressions, and with some of these managers I get the micro expression that, meh, I don't, I don't like you.
• 6:02
  Kathie: I don't want anything to do with you.
• 6:04
  Kathie: Even though that is not what they mean.
• 6:07
  Kathie: Consciously, but subconsciously, it is what they mean.
• 6:12
  Kathie: And so what can help with that is understanding where you are and what your position is.
• 6:19
  Kathie: What's happening as you're walking through the hallways of the company, as you're greeting your team members, as you're talking to them.
• 6:27
  Kathie: Take care of them.
• 6:29
  Kathie: Let's go back to the quote from Simon Sinek.
• 6:33
  Kathie: Leadership is not about being in charge.
• 6:37
  Kathie: It's about taking care of those that are in your charge.
• 6:42
  Kathie: And you know, I, I see it so many times.
• 6:45
  Kathie: Yes, these people do care.
• 6:48
  Kathie: So one of the managers that I worked with a long time ago, I didn't even know she knew me.
• 6:53
  Kathie: I didn't even know she was the person that was in a car accident.
• 6:56
  Kathie: She just happened to drive up behind the car accident right after it happened.
• 7:00
  Kathie: And me and this friend of mine were like, I didn't even know she knew me.
• 7:04
  Kathie: I didn't even know she knew I existed because she walked through the hallways like everybody else with the scowl on her face with, you know, her emails were exuding like, do this, do that, do this.
• 7:18
  Kathie: And so this person told me when she got in that car accident that this lady, the manager was the first person on the scene.
• 7:26
  Kathie: And she ran up to her and she was crying and she was like, are you okay?
• 7:29
  Kathie: Are y'all right?
• 7:30
  Kathie: And my friend was like, I didn't even know she knew my name.
• 7:34
  Kathie: I didn't even know she knew my name and That's the type of thing you don't want to do in a company.
• 7:44
  Kathie: You want to care about those that are in your charge because what happens when you do that, you expand so much and your team will do so much more for you when they feel like you care.
• 7:58
  Kathie: When you don't, when they don't feel like you care, they don't trust you.
• 8:02
  Kathie: They don't have.
• 8:03
  Kathie: the cohesiveness to work as a team effectively.
• 8:08
  Kathie: Otherwise, they're going to just sit back and not say what they need in the office when you're greeted with, what do you want?
• 8:16
  Kathie: This is not helpful.
• 8:18
  Kathie: And I get it.
• 8:19
  Kathie: Things can be stressful.
• 8:20
  Kathie: Things can be out of control.
• 8:22
  Kathie: Maybe perhaps you have a problem with that person.
• 8:25
  Kathie: Well, it comes down to communi Very simple communication skills and also understanding your subconscious mind.
• 8:34
  Kathie: Your subconscious mind takes everything literally.
• 8:38
  Kathie: If you say it's going to be a bad day today, your subconscious mind will give you a bad day.
• 8:44
  Kathie: But if you say it's going to be a great day today, your subconscious mind will give you a great day.
• 8:52
  Kathie: But if you're going, sure Kathie, I say that all the time and it doesn't work, it's because you're still subconsciously telling yourself it's not going to be a great day.
• 9:05
  Kathie: It's just a simple shift in that.
• 9:08
  Kathie: And in communication, instead of greeting somebody with a scowl or hi.
• 9:14
  Kathie: Hi.
• 9:15
  Kathie: Or no hi at all, you just walk by that person because you're so absorbed in your thoughts that you don't even communicate with anybody in the hallways, you are giving off a bad signal and people are not going to trust you.
• 9:30
  Kathie: It's as simple as that.
• 9:32
  Kathie: And all you need to do is make eye contact.
• 9:35
  Kathie: Say hi.
• 9:37
  Kathie: I love the book, The Charisma Myth, because it will teach you how your body language talks to other people, how your presence gives off the energy of a negative or a positive, how your It's, it's, they have the three components.
• 9:56
  Kathie: Power, presence, and warmth.
• 9:59
  Kathie: Warmth can come across in the way you talk.
• 10:02
  Kathie: Like take this, take this sentence for answer, for example.
• 10:06
  Kathie: How you doing today?
• 10:09
  Kathie: Instead of, Hey, how are you doing today, Jamie?
• 10:11
  Kathie: Or, Hey, what's up?
• 10:13
  Kathie: You know, in a fun tone that gives off a good warmth.
• 10:18
  Kathie: And then your body language also can present power or it can present insecurity.
• 10:25
  Kathie: Your micro expressions can present anger or so disgust, grossed out and And maybe it's not even about the person that you're in front of, but when you think about it and you actually consciously make it aware that you want to have power, you want to have presence, you want to have warmth, it makes a big difference.
• 10:51
  Kathie: Makes a big difference in the team, in the culture, in the wellness of the team.
• 10:57
  Kathie: So I invite you to start paying attention to your micro expressions.
• 11:02
  Kathie: Start paying attention to how you Talk to other people.
• 11:05
  Kathie: Start paying attention to your eye contact with other people, your charisma, your personality, how you talk to people, things that come across, especially if you are a leader in your department, a team leader, a manager, a vice president, any of those things, even if you want to be a leader.
• 11:29
  Kathie: All right, that's my episode for today.
• 11:31
  Kathie: Yes, it's short.
• 11:32
  Kathie: Yes, it's sweet.
• 11:33
  Kathie: Bye.
• 11:34
  Kathie: But as you can see, I'm making a pivot in my business and I'm going more towards consulting.
• 11:41
  Kathie: Like I said at the very beginning, one of the ways I enter into a company is I will go and do an audit of what is the temperature of your team?
• 11:51
  Kathie: Because if you don't know the temperature of your team, you can't even find a solution that's going on inside.
• 11:58
  Kathie: And it can be as simple as making a shift in the way the leaders communicate.
• 12:02
  Kathie: It can be as simple as making a shift in the way that your team Works together because they feel like they're not acknowledged.
• 12:11
  Kathie: There's no trust there.
• 12:12
  Kathie: There's no honesty.
• 12:13
  Kathie: So things just start crumbling and it starts at the top and goes to the bottom.
• 12:18
  Kathie: So a leader, a true leader is not just in charge, but they care about those in their charge.
• 12:28
  Kathie: All right.
• 12:29
  Kathie: That's my episode for today.
• 12:30
  Kathie: I trust that you found it helpful.
• 12:32
  Kathie: If you know somebody who can benefit from this, please share it with them.
• 12:35
  Kathie: And until next time, I will see you next time.
• 12:38
  Kathie: Alright, have a great day.
• 12:40
  Kathie: Peace out, and Namaste.
• 12:43
  Kathie: Beow! You know, things can get crazy sometimes.
• 12:46
  Kathie: I get it.
• 12:47
  Kathie: You're walking through the hall and the last thing you wanna do is talk to somebody, but you've gotta make a little mindset shift before you step out that door, or as my friend Lori likes to do before you start walking.
• 12:59
  Kathie: Yes.
• 12:59
  Kathie: It's just that simple.
• 13:06
  Kathie: Remember, your subconscious mind takes everything literally.
• 13:11
  Kathie: Don't tell it things that are a joke.
• 13:14
  Kathie: Don't say, I don't like myself.
• 13:16
  Kathie: Don't say, I don't like today.
• 13:19
  Kathie: Don't say, oh gosh, it's raining again, and it's gonna be a bad day.
• 13:23
  Kathie: No, no, no.
• 13:24
  Kathie: We don't do that.
• 13:26
  Kathie: We don't do that.
• 13:28
  Kathie: Here's my little guy.
• 13:30
  Kathie: He is There he is.
• 13:33
  Kathie: See ya.
• 13:35
  Kathie: Oh, there's my buddy.
• 13:37
  Kathie: By the way, he has a new Instagram account.
• 13:41
  Kathie: I'll have a link to that in the show notes and description below.
• 13:44
  Kathie: You can follow his story there.
• 13:49
  Kathie: Or as I like to say, get a dose of oxytocin.
• 13:55
  Kathie: Did you know that when you pet a dog, you get a dose of oxytocin?
• 13:59
  Kathie: Maybe that would help before you leave your office to just go look at a kid laughing.
• 14:05
  Kathie: And have a good time while you're walking through the halls of your company.
• 14:10
  Kathie: Have a great day.