Latest / Mane AF / EP #1 Welcome to the Mayhem

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EP #1 Welcome to the Mayhem · Mane AF

• speaker-0: How was your day today? speaker-1: It was it was fairly relaxing. I did speaker-0: Good. Holiday. I didn't do anything to piss you off yet? Or speaker-1: But other than that, it was fairly relaxing. speaker-0: I did do something to piss you off already. Okay, good. Good, good, good. So speaker-1: I actually know that you know you did it because you actually came speaker-0: What did I do? speaker-1: you came back later and did a redo. What where you did everything right. speaker-0: What do you mean? What did I do? speaker-1: You woke me up this morning by coming in uber caffeinated. You'd had like five coffees and you immediately started grinding on me about how we were behind on everything and we needed to get everything done today. You'd already been watching a bunch of things and you had five reels you shoved in my face, still in bed. barely even opened my eyes and I have a screen in my face. And then you got frustrated and you left the room. And then you came back a little while later and you said, I love you. And you gave me a kiss on the head and you were all perky, happy talking. So somewhere in your brain, whether you consciously realized it or not, promised, you tried to roll that back and start the takeover better. speaker-0: Well, lookit... I, you're a perfectionist. You drive me fucking crazy. I'm a go-getter. Let's go, go, go. And I know, which drives me crazy because I'm up at the crack of dawn at 6 a.m. before 5 a.m. I'm doing things. I'm... because I can't sleep. And when I'm ready to go, I'm speaker-1: Still sleeping. speaker-0: Yes. speaker-1: It's my superpower. They say do what you're good at. If I could make money sleeping, we would be .... bazillionaires. I'm very good at sleeping. speaker-0: Yeah. So we're starting a podcast about midlife. Yes. speaker-1: We are yep. speaker-0: Which sounds like something people do when they're having a midlife crisis. speaker-1: And we are re examining it and looking at it from the perspective of the fact that it's a wake up call. speaker-0: Yes. And I've missed a lot of wake up calls in my lifetime. speaker-1: And you're making up for that now though. speaker-0: I am. I am. And hopefully we can help other people answer their wake up calls. Yeah. speaker-1: I think ultimately that's really what both of us are hoping to do is is be able to have conversations between us. Be better people to each other while we're having them. speaker-0: And be better people to each other. speaker-1: We'll see how that goes. And and while we're having those conversations that maybe we should have had before in our lives– things, we might have been positioned better in midlife had we had some of these conversations or thought about them earlier, but we put them off and put them off. and maybe we can help other people by doing that. speaker-0: I agree. speaker-1: So Tyler is cueing me that it's my turn to do the intro. This is Mane AF I'm Renae Geerlings. speaker-0: And I'm Tyler Mane speaker-1: And we have spent a lot of our lives telling stories on screen, in comics, and behind the scenes. speaker-0: But this one is personal. speaker-1: Midlife has handed us a lot: reinvention, marriage, aging, loss, illness, purpose, and plenty of wake up calls. speaker-0: So we're having the conversations people our age are really having. Sometimes funny, sometimes uncomfortable, but always brutally on us. speaker-1: Welcome to Midlife Marriage and Mayhem. speaker-0: We're Mane AF. Woo, we kind of nailed that. That was pretty good. speaker-1: That was our first one. One in the can. speaker-0: We are on to the next part of this. speaker-1: So we wanted to talk about why we're doing this. speaker-0: the reason why I'm finally becoming comfortable in my skin. I was a tall skinny kid, glasses, braces, slightly dyslexic, that had so much fear flowing through my body my entire life. Even during my professional wrestling career, even during my acting career, I was always feeling I was not good enough, never gonna make it, really make it. And Now here I am, like with what was handed to me this year, with starting in March, my brother having a massive heart attack and taking, you know, them taking about an hour to bring him back. And he spent a year in the spent a week in the hospital. And about day three of that, I was like. I started to ask the questions of the doctors, is he ever gonna walk out of this hospital? And they said there's a zero percent chance. Yeah. Is he ever gonna wake up? There's a one percent chance. So seeing my brother lying there, who I idolized my entire life. Knowing that it wasn't gonna get better for him because he was probably at that point in time technically brain dead hit me hard and has made me reevaluate my life. And and I guess that's why. And then three weeks later, of course, you know, I get this lump cut out of me. It comes back as invasive ductal carcinoma. Twenty-eight millimeter lump that is removed that tumor tumor. Well lump tumor. Keeping it simple for people. It's a lump. I don't like the word. It's not a tumor. speaker-1: You don't hear too much. speaker-0: It's not a tumor. It was it's gone. Yes. But dealing with that. And the whole mortality of what I'm facing, I am I am sixty one. It has crossed my brain panned many a times, how much time do I have left? And this is all the wake up call. And then now most recently with your father and his accident. Yeah. That really speaker-1: Yeah. so I'm ten years younger than you. speaker-0: Keep reminding me. Keep reminding me. speaker-1: we will. 10 years younger than you, but also now entering the stage of life where all of the midlife things are hitting me with the loss of my father this past week. When you're 51 years old as I am, losing a parent is not an unexpected thing to happen at this stage of life. And my father was dealing with some comorbidities, he was having some health issues, he was his kidneys had slowly declined over the years, and they had just started him on dialysis. he had had some heart issues that had been slowly declining over the years. But I think when things slowly decline, there's just always more time. speaker-0: Yeah, it's never speaker-1: until you get the phone call that he had a horrible car accident and hit the back of a semi. and passed away instantly. So that was not something I was prepared to deal with in that fashion. And I'm still dealing with it. And I'm sure I will be dealing with it for the rest of my life. but speaker-0: Well, as you do with a loss of... of a parent, a loss of anyone. I mean, I lost my parents quite some time ago. Mm-hmm. And it still passes through my mind that I really miss him. I have moments. And and like I said, it's it's something that you you get more used to, but it is something that you have to totally adjust to. And I and I know you were always talking to your parents, your your father, and and like I mean you would have daily conversations, which I so much he is speaker-1: A joke about the fact that he said, you know, basically you're keeping me alive. I bought him the Fitbit so that I would keep him moving. And I was constantly telling him, you know, I know you like your one nightly drink, but it's actually a class one carcinogen. and helping him with diet and sending him his amino acids and telling him about vitamin D and omega-3s and yeah, so I think there's just a lot of stuff that has hit us all at once. We were already talking about the podcast when you lost your brother and got your diagnosis and decided that you wanted to go public because specifically for male breast cancer, is it's so rare. Only one percent of men get it. Yes. And we learned that men usually have worse outcomes. 500 men per year die. of breast cancer, which is unnecessary because had they checked it out earlier, the that number would be much lower. And you decided to come out and talk about it and we decided to do the podcast and then speaker-0: Well, let's I I mean, let's face it, guys have a different kind of mindset. A lot of the times they're thinking about taking care of their family and and if something hits me, I won't be able to do that. Right. And you know, I I am just so thankful. And I'm pretty sure I thank you every day saying thank you for Making me get my ass in there and do it. But you do I mean, I also it also runs through my head, I was up for a couple of things that would be filming for quite some time. And then I think had I got those roles. speaker-1: Yeah. You wouldn't you would not have gotten it. speaker-0: I would not because I would be like, No, there's no way I can't speaker-1: Jeopardizing this. speaker-0: I'm not gonna jeopardize this. I'm not gonna take this away from my family. I'm not gonna do this. I'm gonna suck it up. I'm gonna fight the fight. And by that point, I could have been at this scene where it is a stage four speaker-1: Too late. speaker-0: metastasizing, not a good situation. So I am so thankful that everything, and and that's what I say about this business. Everything happens for a reason. Yeah. Everything happens for a reason in your life. speaker-1: Right. And I think too, the so I'm fifty one and you're sixty-one, which is not a spring chicken, but also given scientific advancements, given things they're learning about longevity, is also not necess... it's not old either. We are still very mobile, we're still very active. Very much we you know, tried our best. To do the best we can to take care of ourselves these days could always improve, I suppose. speaker-0: Well, i it took me a little bit of time to come on board to that, you know, with getting rid of the booze and all of that. But I think that also is why we are where we are. Right. Because year and a half ago I put the bottle down. I mean, I loved my bourbons, as you know. And that caused some issues in our relationship that we're gonna talk about in later podcasts and situations that I'm not proud of. It also by putting that bottle down sent me on a new journey, fitness journey to get healthy. And I think had I not been a year and a half down the road of getting all of this out of my system, that I would be as healthy as I am today going through speaker-1: May have progressed a lot faster too. If I mean, if you think about it, you would have had more of a fertile breeding ground with the sugar in your blood system and stuff. it may have taken off like wildfire and the there's it's possible that making that decision also saved your life. And the other thing I like to say is, right, it's a very zen thing with the like, we'll see. you You found a horse. that's this the old Zen story. sir, you found a horse. What a wonderful thing. We'll see. Then his son falls off the horse and breaks his arm. what a terrible thing. It's too bad you found that horse. We'll see. Then the army comes by to conscript the young men and his son can't go because his arm is broken. We'll see. Taking that story and extrapolating it to this situation, I look at the fact that this caused you to get genetic testing. Yes. You found it early because you don't have a lot of tissue in your chest. but now your children have the opportunity to get tested. And if your daughter does have the BRCA gene, which speaker-0: There's a fifty fifty chance. Yeah. Sixty speaker-1: A sixty percent chance. speaker-0: percent. Right. See, there you come pulling out the statistics. speaker-1: Yeah, I mean it's it's really important for women to know that. And she would not have known that had this not happened to you. So while it it sucks that we are going through four rounds of chemotherapy for you, you potentially saved your daughter's life. speaker-0: Exactly. And we are going to have the genetic testing lady come on on a for a podcast to explain just what they do and how for sure they can help save lives. So here is speaker-1: So let's talk a little bit about who we are for people who don't know, although I feel like if they've stayed this long they probably haven't speaker-0: Got a good they got a good clue that you're the smart one and I'm just speaker-1: And if they don't know they're gonna know real soon. speaker-0: Gonna know real soon because we're gonna test my reading abilities here. speaker-1: Verbal and P is the visual. That is that is what it is. He's the numbers. I'm the words. I just knocked your camera while your dog knocks your camera. speaker-0: I decided well I we decided to read each other's bios here. I'm gonna blame if I They're kinda boring. speaker-1: Boring. speaker-0: If I... are you saying we're boring people? You say speaker-1: Bios are boring. speaker-0: Well, bios are boring. But anyhow, we're gonna read each other's bios. So if I mess this up too much because I haven't even looked at this this for a while, I'm gonna blame it on my dyslexia and chemo and I'm gonna have chemo brain. Okay. So here speaker-1: Okay, fair. speaker-0: we go. This is Renae's Bio, and this is my best shot at reading her bio. After many years of working as a comic book editor, including some time as the editor-in-chief at Top Cow Comics, working on comics like Witchblade, The Darkness, Tomb Raider, and Wanted, and managing editing consulting work with many other companies, including Darby Paw Publishing, Sparks Unlimited, and Radical Publishing, in Recent years she has turned her Mane focus back to her acting career with film and television projects projects like Halloween two, Will Trent, The Wonder Years, The Game, as well as many as well as being a company member of the award-winning Rogue Theater, performing in Rogue Machine Theater, performing in Arthur Miller's Broken Glass from the West Coast Jewish Theater and earning an LA Weekly nomination for Best Supporting Actress in the Arc Theater's A Doll House. A doll's house. A Doll's House. She wrote and produced two feature films with me. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: Because I forced you. Which are Compound Fracture and Penance Lane. And she is represented by Formation Talent Agency in Atlanta. And in Renae's spare time, Renae is an avid supporter of animal rescue. And she has also been the producer of DR1 Live Drone Racing Events, two toy commercials, Mountain Dew Twitch streaming channel with Mountain Dew Tour in Long Beach and Breckenridge. speaker-1: Breckenridge, yeah, we did a live due tour. We streamed live from Breckenridge and altitude sickness is a real thing. Yeah. speaker-0: But yeah, so I mean you have had a very, very speaker-1: Yeah, you came to Los Angeles and said, I wanna be well, first you said I wanna be a wrestler, and then you went and you did that. And then you said I wanna be an actor. And then you came to Los Angeles and you did that. I graduated from theater school, Hope College Theater Department, and was prepared to do theater in Chicago or New York, but nope, I didn't want snow. So I went to Los Angeles. I had no idea what I was doing, and I pretty much used up all of my bravery. On the drive over there and then took a speaker-0: But but I want now I want you to tell one story right now that I think is so hilarious. You did the drive to Los Angeles with who? My dad. Yes, you did. Tell tell us about the story when he was getting ready to go home and you guys were having speaker-1: I don't know if I can tell that story right now. speaker-0: Yes you can. Go for it. It's so this is this is priceless. speaker-1: So sad now. my dad drove me across country with my little nineteen eighty four cavalier packed full to the gills. And as he was getting ready to get onto the airplane, We stopped for one last meal together at the IHOP on Santa Monica Boulevard, right by Barney's Beanery in West Hollywood. And I said to him, I started to get really scared. And I said, dad, you know, I'm really gonna miss you. And it's the only time in my life. Uh-oh. It's the only time in my life I ever saw him get choked up. And his eyes filled, like mine are right now. And he said, you know, Nate, I'm really gonna miss you too. And then to collect himself, he turned his head and looked out the window across the street of Santa Monica Boulevard. And there was a store there at the time in 1996 called Dream Dresser. Dream Dresser was a an erotica store that specialized in leather. And in the front window was a leather nun outfit with Cat of Ninetales whip and a leather cheerleader outfit with straps and accoutrements. And he turned out and he looked out the window and he came back to me with panic in his eyes and he said, You know, Renae, you don't have to get on the you, you don't have to stay. You can just get right back in the car. Nobody will ever know the difference. We can just turn around right now and we can just go home. You do not have to stay. And I said, No, Dad, I have to... I have to give it five years. I told myself I'd give it five years. I'm not gonna chicken out before five years, so it's five years. And speaker-0: And I think it's i y that is and you did stick it out. And you you've done amazing things. And the funny thing is, like, I wonder how our lives could have crossed because I've got stories about Barney's Beanery being there on Thanksgiving Day and going to Barney's Beanery and and that was the only place that was open in Los Angeles where they'd serve you a meal for free. Yeah. speaker-1: I partook of the Thanksgiving meal at Barney's Greenery in like ninety seven, ninety eight, but speaker-0: I did too. I can't remember the years it was. So we might have crossed paths even earlier. We might have. Yeah. speaker-1: Well let me read your bio. speaker-0: Okay, imbe is the word embellish? No. How yes, embellish, make me better make you look. Yes, please. Okay. speaker-1: Better than your bio does. I'm I'm gonna read your bio and then we'll speaker-0: And then we'll talk about it. Okay, thank you. speaker-1: A native of Saskatoon, Canada, Tyler briefly played semi-pro football before wrestling worldwide professionally from 1986 to 1999 for the WCW and the WUWF. He wrestled as Big Sky with his tag team partner Kevin Nash and as the evil Nitron. His acting breakout came in 2000, where he starred as Sabretooth in Marvel Studios X-Men. He recently reprised the role in the box office record-breaking Deadpool and Wolverine. He also starred as Michael Myers in Rob Zombie's Halloween, which held the Memorial Day box office record from 2007 to 2021, and Halloween 2. Some of his other film credits include Playing with Fire, Troy, Joe Dirt, The Scorpion King, and The Devil's Rejects. On the television front, his credits include the role of Black Star in Mark Miller's Netflix series Jupiter's Legacy. He also appeared in Doom Patrol, Monk, Son of the Beach, Party of Five, and The Librarians, Midnight Texas, and My Boys. Mane's production company, Mane Entertainment, has produced two feature films, Compound Fracture and Penance Lane, and Tyler's graphic novel, The Last Spartan Red Tape, is currently in production of its second story, The Last Spartan Lone Wolf. speaker-0: Voice when you do that. You use that your announcer voice. It's kind speaker-1: Mm. speaker-0: of your AI sexy voice. I love that. speaker-1: Now there's a lot of stuff that they didn't that you didn't talk about on here because this is specifically your your entertainment bio. speaker-0: Yeah, it's the entertainment bio. speaker-1: So for a time in the nineties, we're building homes. You built speaker-0: Yeah, Missouri. Yes, I had a speaker-1: two houses of your own, speaker-0: Yep. speaker-1: custom built homes. speaker-0: First one was with my father. First one you moved with your father. Yes. speaker-1: That's pretty special. speaker-0: That is very special. speaker-1: And I love that those places still stand. speaker-0: Yes. Somewhere we built them very well. Thank you. speaker-1: Somewhere there's a whole neighborhood where people are living in houses that are built. speaker-0: That is true. That is true. Yeah. You know, and and the one thing that I'd have to say is that the things that really stand out in my career that kind of Dare I say freak me out, it's not freak me out or whatever. But when people call me a horror icon, I'm like, ooh, I'm horror. Horror. Not a whore Right. Thanks for correcting me again. speaker-1: Well, enunciation is important on some. speaker-0: I'm Canadian, leave me alone. A horror icon. It kind of I don't look at myself as that. But the one thing that I do want to say that is so, so true, and I don't you know, I realize it every day. The person that I owe to who I am, to where I am today is Rob Zombie. Because without Rob Zombie, we speaker-1: We always we always refer to our house in LA as the house that Rob built. speaker-0: That is true. Yeah. Yeah. Because it has been the game changer. Because in a career, it and it's funny because when I did X-Men, people are like, this is gonna change your career. And and I ... talk to other actors, you know, they're like, this is gonna be a big game changer. Well, it really didn't change the career trajectory as much as I'd hoped. But it was a a great stepping stone. But the one that did change the track trajectory that gave us the opportunity to do what we are doing today is Rob Zombie's Halloween. Yeah. And Halloween two. Yeah. So thank you, Rob. Yeah. I owe ya. speaker-1: Salute you. Rob also gave me my first role in a big feature film. That was really fun. We'll talk about that someday. We'll we'll have to do like a whole people like that. speaker-0: Yes. With pictures and everything, because it was kind of crazy. You know, I I didn't really get it until I saw the fanboys going crazy over you. And then I kind of was like, get away from my wife, you perverts. But anyhow, moving on. speaker-1: Are you saying you needed the fanboys to tell you I was I had something? speaker-0: No, I knew you had something, but I didn't look at you like that, which is kinda different. speaker-1: I don't know how feel about any of this conversation. speaker-0: Well when you Okay, when you stepped out of your dressing room the first time speaker-1: Cop outfit. speaker-0: with your Helga buns, yes and all the speaker-1: I will never forget your face. I walked up to you and you were sort of you were very nonplussed. little little com little confused. You were not sure how to react to that. that that may speaker-0: Well, and then when all of the teamsters and everybody's like, Whoa, she's hot I'm like, Hey, that's my wife, dude They're like, sorry So but yeah, so that was, you know. But you and and I guess that your film career has really taken off since we've come to Georgia here and and moved to Georgia where you've decided to pursue pursue your acting career more. speaker-1: Well, I'm yeah, I can definitely do that here more. It's a better market for me. for various reasons. some of that is just my perception of it. It's a much friendlier market. And I'm I've just really enjoyed the time and opportunities here in Georgia. Unfortunately we did end up with COVID and then the strike. And now everything is fairly quiet. But I do love acting and I do love the opportunity to do it. So that's pretty cool. speaker-0: Yeah, and and I think both both of us coming to Georgia here is where we kind of made our midlife switch of very much a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I I have settled into who I am and where my career is going and and I realize that people ... perceive me as this big badass, which I'm not. promised. Thank you. Between you and Scout going, you're a big teddy bear. You know, it's and I think the one thing too that helped solidify was when we did the courses where speaker-1: Hm, I feel like we're playing a mad lib here. Charades? What is this? speaker-0: Sounds like we went he we did his classes in LA and did them here. Sit thank you right on the nose, Sam Christensen. Okay. So we did the Sam Christensen thing and one of my things was he speaker-1: One of your essences that you get at the end of the course. Yeah, because I had been right all these years. What was that? What speaker-0: Okay. speaker-1: was that, honey? speaker-0: the the next thing I think we speaker-1: I'm sorry, what was that? speaker-0: Okay, you are right again. You were right again. I mean, I know you're you're the calm to my crazy. I I need you to keep my feet grounded. And you do a very good job at that. But like, you know, it's like you have had a career in comic books and mythology and all of this stuff. And how does that How's that helped you in your midlife where we're kinda at now? speaker-1: How has it helped me in my midlife? well, Sam Christensen, just to go back to the Sam Christensen essence classes that you were talking about, and I studied with Sam actually to take over and do some of those workshops. I found his his whole system to be pretty amazing in like 10 years of therapy in one weekend. Shout out Sam Christensen. one of the things that he impressed upon me is that. In a Jungian fashion, we won't go too deep into this, but one of the things that comes up in almost everything I talk about is this idea of myth and story, that things have stories. And he said to me at the end of the class, he said, I bet you collect a lot of things that are nostalgic. ⁓ I bet you love photos ⁓ and places mean a lot to you, and you try to remember stories. And he said, Because your thing is myth, you ⁓ are all about the stories and Myth was created in order for human beings not to be alone. And he actually does a whole segment in it in the class about how what we do as artists is is really important and that people have been doing it since the dawn of time. We tell each other stories so as not to feel alone. And that is that's very important to me. myth is very important for making people not feel alone. And for me, that's what I see this podcast as being is a way to deal with the stuff that we're in the middle of dealing with. bring in s experts, because we are not experts. We are not gurus. We are definitely people who are going through it. And Happening to get hit pretty hard by some stuff right now and asking the questions: what's next? Am I still happy? Am I still brave? Am I just settling? Is my world getting smaller? I don't want to do that. And I would also like to help inspire other people. Funny side story: my grandfather actually called me Barbara for a year of my life when I was in college because he didn't want me to go into acting. He thought I would be better as an investigative journalist. And so he called me Barbara as if I was Barbara Walters for a year. I guess he thought if you just if you act as if it will happen. Well, grandpa, here we are. I I'm doing a podcast. Hope that counts. speaker-0: Yeah, and and believe me, you are the perfectionist on this and gonna be the one that finds all the facts and stuff. But the thing the another reason I why I want to do it it too is that there are so many people on the internet talking so much bullshit about stuff that especially with getting this cancer diagnosis and getting it cut out of me and moving on and treatment and everything, people are like, try this, try that, try this, try that. It's not a lot of it proven stuff. speaker-1: Vetted. speaker-0: It's not vetted properly that I want to eventually get into and talk about, but that will be other podcasts also. Right. You know, and and that is stuff that I wanna that we need to get into, you know, and and we're gonna talk about our parenting, how I threw you into being a parent at well you got off kind of easy. You you didn't have to give birth. That's true. That's any consolation. speaker-1: I inherited them at six and seven. speaker-0: You You did. And speaker-1: I think I think what's what's great about what's what's great about us, don't no cut that out. we're not just another just another couple kind of chatting through a podcast. We actually have kind of an interesting perspective on the world, or I think it is. So I guess people have to tell us if it is, but we both came from small towns. You came from Canada, I came from Holland, well, Zealand, Michigan, Zealand, Go Chicks. And moved to big cities and then have spent the last few decades rubbing elbows with some really cool stuff, being involved in some great projects and interacting with people who everybody would know, names that they would know and speaker-0: And we are definitely not Hollywood. And we are We speaker-1: Not high speaker-0: are not Hollywood. Yeah. We run from it. It's a and it I think that's kind of seeing how we evolved that way, you know, at the beginning we were like, go to the go to the red carpets, go to this thing, go to that. Now speaker-1: record. I hate red carpet. Red carpets are the worst. They are so uncomfortable and they look so cool on camera. And everybody looks like they're having so much fun. And then you kind of see how they they like cattle in onto the red carpet and People might know who you are and they might not, promised, and they're all yelling you at you at the same time and you have about ten seconds and then somebody cooler comes along and you are immediately forgotten or worse pushed out of the way. That's what would always happen to me with you. They'd be like, Okay, could you just get out of the picture so we could just get Tyler? Nothing makes you feel better than being the plus one that somebody was like, Yes, minus one now. Thank you. speaker-0: I would always try and bring you back in and and make sure that you were I know, I know. speaker-1: Yeah, they still hurt my feelings. But it you know, you also then you have to understand the economy of it because they need to get the picture that's going to sell and truth be told, somebody that nobody knows is probably not gonna sell the picture. speaker-0: And and now I think it's kind of funny that when we're in our midlife, even here in Georgia, where we think, we gotta do a drive, we would do further drives in Los Angeles and we'd go and get ready and go. But now it's like I love it. Sometimes you'll start to do your hair or something, and we're going, Do you really want to go to this? Nah, we'll just stay home. And then we come downstairs and we watch a movie or something. And it's so speaker-1: much well I think COVID also moving into moving into a a quiet neighborhood was the start of something. I just don't have the interest in going out and bar hopping anymore. And being in a nice quiet neighborhood was great. And then COVID was basically all of my social muscles atrophied. And now I don't know. I don't know how to put makeup on anymore. I don't know how to get ready. And I really stress about it now. I always had a bit of a social anxiety that I was very good at hiding. Yeah, now I just I now I just don't care. Now that I'm in midlife, I I don't care. I don't care anymore. speaker-0: Yeah, I think we both evolved that way, like especially like speaker-1: Devolved. speaker-0: So we're gonna have a lot to talk about on this podcast. We're gonna talk about our bodies and how they've changed and we're gonna have experts on. I have talked to my oncologist. She is going to come on and talk with us. The genetics is going to come on and talk. We're going to have other top guests. We're going to talk about anything and everything. And what we want you to do is Send us your messages, what you would like us to talk about midlife and how we're dealing with it and how see if we can give any advice. I wouldn't suggest taking our advice, but we'll give it. speaker-1: We'll we'll at least be really good about telling you what not to do. speaker-0: Yeah. And we're gonna have we're gonna have speaker-1: options. speaker-0: yes. We're gonna have actors on here. We're gonna have podcasters on here. We're gonna have comic creators. You know, we're gonna have we're gonna be talking about health. One of the things that I really am excited about talking about is my health journey. We're gonna be dealing with grief loss and we're gonna talk about friendships. speaker-1: reinvention. You know, there's something I said to somebody recently where I said, I think it's, I think there's a missing slice of entertainment. And it exists to some extent. So I'm being a little bit tongue-in-cheek about this, but they give you all these Disney movies, all these coming-of-age movies when you're a kid and you watch the Disney princesses and all of these Pixar films about kids who are learning How to get through the teenage years or you know, those those bumps and bruises during that age. I need a Disney movie for a paramenopausal woman. I need somebody, I need them to be singing songs about what happens after this phase of life because I feel like they didn't, they didn't talk about that. And Gen X is definitely, at least through the internet, starting to share a lot of. Nobody warned me what was going to happen. I'm basically going through a second reverse puberty. And this sucks in ways nobody ever warned me about. and hormone replacement therapy and who it works for and who it doesn't work for. what are the symptoms of this wholly new world? But also, you know, there's a l so many women, specifically women, who talk about the 60s and 70s are like the happiest years of my life. I finally got to a point where I was comfortable and I was just having a really good time and finally got to do all the things I wanted to do when I was young, but never had time for. And I think people are starting to talk about that. And I think we should be talking about it more. It's not over. You're never over. It's not over until it's over. You know? And we have every opportunity to make the choice to keep making our lives better. And how do we do that? What are the options? What are the things we should be talking about? and then even, you know, the big dark questions, like I know for you, you would not talk about estate planning or anything that you labeled morbid. Look at you. Even now your body language. And I kept saying, No, this is like it's And it's very to do that to your family. speaker-0: I know. I know. And and seeing how your parents handled it. And awesome. Awesome. You were awesome. And everything was planned out and and done. And I'm I'm seeing that that is the wake up call that I got this week. You know, we we have done an estate planning. We need to finalize it more, but that is stuff that we'll be talking about also. We just speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: Well, I'm try I keep saying I need an assistant. I need an assistant. Okay, so we're getting close to winding this down because we've talked about a lot of things that we're gonna talk about. speaker-1: What was one wake up call you got this week? Was that the planning? speaker-0: I think the wake up call that I got that still this kind of blends into last week is when your f we got the call that your father was gone. Live life to the fullest because you don't know when it's gonna be taken away. Enjoy what you got while you've got it, because you get one ride. What was your wake up call? Besides me in the morning saying, Get up and let's work. speaker-1: my wake up call this week was well, I think it's also around my father. I mean, obviously my father, the loss of my father has great echoes in our household. And I think I was coasting. I've been coasting a little bit, sort of waiting, feeling frustrated, letting my world get a little bit small. Putting off visiting my parents because it was just easier the last time I saw them was in December. just kind of punting all the cans down the road. And yeah, this last week has well, this last few weeks has really been, don't don't put off till tomorrow what you can do today, because tomorrow is not. promised. What was what was your wake up call this week? speaker-0: Mine is that strength changes. And it's not always about pushing hard. But smarter. speaker-1: Are you learning that through your treatment? speaker-0: I fully believe so. I'm I'm setting boundaries for myself, so I'm pushing myself, but I'm not pushing to the point where I did. The first first chemo round I pushed myself pretty hard. I was like, I I paid for it and now I'm I'm going through this one a little bit differently and And and here we go. So hopefully the next two I've got two more rounds of chemo to go. And then some radiation, and then we're back on the path of getting things on track. Cool. speaker-1: Well, then I think we are about to the end of our first podcast. Thank you to everybody who has joined us here at the very beginning. speaker-0: Yes. Thank you so much for joining us on Mane AF. We greatly appreciate it. speaker-1: And we'll be having all of the conversations coming up. Some will be funny, some will be dark, some will be serious, some will be filterless. But speaker-0: And they're all gonna be you correcting me all the way along. speaker-1: And and a lot of that. So follow, subscribe, comment on our posts if you would, share with us in your DMs, your wake up calls. we would love to talk about all the things that you want to talk about as well. speaker-0: And midlife isn't the end of the story. It's the part where things finally get honest. Yeah. And this is Mane AF.