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06 - In Which Piglet Meets a Heffalump · Winnie-the-Pooh

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  Speaker 1: Chapter five of Winnie the Pooh by A. A. Milne.
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  Speaker 1: This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in
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  Speaker 1: the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please
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  Speaker 1: visit LibriVox dot org. Chapter five, in which Piglet meets
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: a heaflump One day, when Christopher Robin and Winnie the
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: Pooh and Piglet were all talking together. Christopher Robin finished
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  Speaker 1: the mouthful he was eating and said, carelessly, I saw.
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  Speaker 2: A heffolump today, Piglet.
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  Speaker 1: What was it doing, asked Piglet, Just lumping along, said
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  Speaker 1: Christopher Robin.
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  Speaker 2: I don't think it saw me.
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  Speaker 1: I saw one once, said Piglet.
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  Speaker 3: Ath Lease start think I did, he said, Only perhaps
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  Speaker 3: it wasn't, so did.
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  Speaker 1: I, said Pooh, wondering what a heffalump was like. You
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  Speaker 1: don't often see them, said Christopher Robin carelessly. Not now, said.
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  Speaker 4: Piglet, Not at this time of year, said Pooh.
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  Speaker 1: Then they all talked about something else until it was
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  Speaker 1: time for Pooh and Piglet to go home together. At first,
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  Speaker 1: as they stumped along the path which edged the hundred
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  Speaker 1: Acre Wood, they didn't say much to each other, But
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  Speaker 1: when they came to the stream and had helped each
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  Speaker 1: other across the stepping stones and were able to walk
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  Speaker 1: side by side again over the heather. They began to
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  Speaker 1: talk in a friendly way about this and that, and
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  Speaker 1: Piglet said.
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  Speaker 3: If you see what I mean, Pio, and Pooh.
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  Speaker 4: Said, it's just what I think myself Piglet. And Piglet said.
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  Speaker 3: But on the other hand, Poo, we must remember, and.
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  Speaker 4: Pooh said, quite true, Piglet, although I had forgotten it
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  Speaker 4: for the moment.
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  Speaker 1: And then, just as they came to the six pine trees,
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  Speaker 1: Pooh looked round to see that nobody else was listening,
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  Speaker 1: and said, in a very solemn voice.
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  Speaker 4: Piglet, I have decided something.
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  Speaker 3: What have you decided, Pao, I.
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  Speaker 4: Have decided to catch a heffe lump.
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  Speaker 1: Poo nodded his head several times as he said this,
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  Speaker 1: and waited for Piglet to.
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  Speaker 3: Say how, or Pooh, you couldn't.
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  Speaker 1: Or something helpful of that sort, but Piglet said nothing.
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  Speaker 1: The fact was Piglet was wishing that he had thought
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  Speaker 1: about it first. I shall do it, said Pooh, after
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  Speaker 1: waiting a little longer.
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  Speaker 4: By means of a trap. And it must be a
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  Speaker 4: cunning trap, so you will have to help me.
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  Speaker 1: Piglet, Pao said Piglet, feeling quite happy again. Now I will,
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  Speaker 1: And then he said how shall we do it?
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  Speaker 4: And Pooh said that's just it.
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  Speaker 1: How and then they sat down together to think it out.
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  Speaker 1: Pooh's first idea was that they should dig a very
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  Speaker 1: deep pit, and then the Heffalump would come along and
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  Speaker 1: fall into the pit. And why, said Piglet, Why what,
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: said Pooh?
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  Speaker 3: Why would he fall in?
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  Speaker 1: Pooh rubbed his nose with his paw and said that
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  Speaker 1: the Huffalump might be walking along, humming a little song
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  Speaker 1: and looking up at the sky wondering if it would rain,
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  Speaker 1: and so he wouldn't see the very deep pit until
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  Speaker 1: he was half way down, when it would be too late.
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  Speaker 1: Piglet said that this was a very good trap, but
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  Speaker 1: supposing it were raining already, Pooh rubbed his nose again
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  Speaker 1: and said that he hadn't thought of that, And then
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  Speaker 1: he brightened up and said that if it were raining already,
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  Speaker 1: the Hefflump would be looking at the sky wondering if
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  Speaker 1: it would clear up, and so he wouldn't see the
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  Speaker 1: very deep pit until he was half way down, when
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  Speaker 1: it would be too late. Piglet said that now at
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  Speaker 1: this point had been explained, he thought it was a
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  Speaker 1: cunning trap. Pooh was very proud when he heard this,
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  Speaker 1: and he felt that the heffalump was as good as
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  Speaker 1: caught already. But there was just one other thing which
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  Speaker 1: had to be thought about, and it was this, Where
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  Speaker 1: should they dig the very deep pit? Piglet said that
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  Speaker 1: the best place would be somewhere where a heffalump was
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  Speaker 1: just before he fell into it, only about a foot
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  Speaker 1: farther on.
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  Speaker 4: But then he would see us digging it, said Pooh.
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  Speaker 3: Not to feel looking at.
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  Speaker 4: The sky, he would suspect, said Pooh, if he happened
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  Speaker 4: to look down.
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  Speaker 1: He thought for a long time, and then added, sadly.
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  Speaker 4: It isn't as easy as I thought. I suppose that's
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  Speaker 4: why half a lumps hardly ever get caught.
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  Speaker 1: That must be said Piglet. They sighed and got up,
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  Speaker 1: and when they had taken a few gorse prickles out
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  Speaker 1: of themselves, they sat down again, And all the time
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  Speaker 1: Pooh was saying to himself.
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  Speaker 4: If only I could think of something, for.
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  Speaker 1: He felt sure that a very clever brain could catch
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  Speaker 1: a heavlump if only he knew the right way to
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  Speaker 1: go about it.
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  Speaker 4: Suppose he said to pig Lit, you wanted to catch me,
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  Speaker 4: how would you do it.
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  Speaker 1: Well, said Piglet, I should do it like this.
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  Speaker 3: I should make a trap, and I should put the
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  Speaker 3: jar of honey in the trap, and you would smell it,
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  Speaker 3: and you would go in after it, and and I would.
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  Speaker 4: Go in after it, said Pooh excitedly, only very carefully
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  Speaker 4: so as to not hurt myself. And I would get
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  Speaker 4: to the jar of honey, and I should lick round
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  Speaker 4: the edges first of all, pretending that there wasn't any more,
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  Speaker 4: you know, And then I should walk away and think
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  Speaker 4: about it a little, and then I should come back
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  Speaker 4: and start looking in the middle of the jar, and.
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  Speaker 3: Then yes, well, never mind about it. There you would be,
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  Speaker 3: and there I would catch you. Now, the first thing
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  Speaker 3: to think of is what do hef lumps like? I
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  Speaker 3: should think acorns? Shouldn't you well get a lot of
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  Speaker 3: I say, wake up pail.
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  Speaker 1: Pooh, who had gone into a happy dream, woke up
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  Speaker 1: with a start and said that honey was a much
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  Speaker 1: more trappy thing than hacorns. Piglet didn't think so, and
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  Speaker 1: they were just going to argue about it. When Piglet
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  Speaker 1: remembered that if they put acorns in the trap, he
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  Speaker 1: would have to find the acorns. But if they put honey,
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  Speaker 1: then Pooh would have to give up some of his
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  Speaker 1: own honey. So he said, all right, honey. Then just
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  Speaker 1: as Pooh remembered it too and was going to say,
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  Speaker 1: all right, hacorns, honey, said Piglet to himself in a
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  Speaker 1: thoughtful way, as if it were now settled.
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  Speaker 3: I'll dig the pit while you go and get the honey.
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  Speaker 1: Very well, said Pooh, and he stumped off. As soon
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  Speaker 1: as he got home. He went to the larder and
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  Speaker 1: he stood on a chair and took down a very
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  Speaker 1: large jar of honey from the top shelf. It had
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  Speaker 1: hed you and n y written on it, but just
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  Speaker 1: to make sure, he took off the paper cover and
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  Speaker 1: looked at it, and it looked just like honey.
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  Speaker 4: But you can never tell, said Pooh. I remember my
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  Speaker 4: uncle saying ones that he had seen cheese this color.
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  Speaker 1: So he put his tongue in and took a large lick.
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  Speaker 4: Yes, he said, it is no doubt about that, And honey,
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  Speaker 4: I should say, right down to the bottom of the jar, unless,
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  Speaker 4: of course, he said, somebody put cheese in the bottom
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  Speaker 4: just for a joke. Perhaps I had better go a
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  Speaker 4: little further, just in case, in case any heffalumps don't
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  Speaker 4: like cheese, same as me.
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  Speaker 1: And he gave a deep sigh.
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  Speaker 4: I was right, It is honey, right the way down.
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  Speaker 1: Having made certain of this, he took the jar back
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  Speaker 1: to Piglet, and Piglet looked up from the bottom of
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  Speaker 1: his very deep pit and said, got it. And Pooh said.
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  Speaker 4: Yes, but it isn't quite a full.
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  Speaker 1: Jar, and he threw it down to Piglet, and Piglet said,
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  Speaker 1: now it isn't.
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  Speaker 3: Is that all you've got left?
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  Speaker 1: And Pooh said yes, because it was so. Piglet put
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  Speaker 1: the jar at the bottom of the pit and climbed out,
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  Speaker 1: and they went off home together. Well, good night, Pio,
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  Speaker 1: said Piglet when they had got to Pooh's house.
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  Speaker 3: And six o'clock tomorrow morning. Buy the pine trees and
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  Speaker 3: see how many heflimps we've got on trap six.
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  Speaker 4: O'clock, Piglet, And have you got any string?
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  Speaker 3: Now? Why do you want a string.
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  Speaker 4: To leave them home with?
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  Speaker 3: Oh? I think hevulumps come if you whistle.
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  Speaker 4: Some do and some don't. You can never tell with
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  Speaker 4: heff lumps, well, good night.
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  Speaker 1: Good night, and off Piglet trotted to his house. Trespassers
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  Speaker 1: w while Pooh made his preparations for bed. Some hours later,
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  Speaker 1: just as the night was beginning to steal away, Pooh
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  Speaker 1: woke up suddenly with a sinking feeling. He had had
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  Speaker 1: that sinking feeling before, and he knew what it meant.
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  Speaker 1: He was hungry, so he went to the larder and
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  Speaker 1: he stood on a chair and reached up to the
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  Speaker 1: top shelf and found nothing.
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  Speaker 4: That's funny, he thought, I know I had a jar
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  Speaker 4: of honey there, a full jar full of honey, right
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  Speaker 4: up to the top, and it had honey written on it,
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  Speaker 4: so that I should know it was honey. That's very funny.
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  Speaker 1: And then he began to wander up and down, wondering
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  Speaker 1: where it was, and murmuring a murmur to himself.
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  Speaker 4: Like this, it's very funny, very funny, because I know
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  Speaker 4: I had some honey because it had a label on
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  Speaker 4: saying honey, A gluptuous full of pot too. And I
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  Speaker 4: don't know where it's got to. No, I don't know
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  Speaker 4: where it's gone. Well, it's funny.
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  Speaker 1: He had murmured this to himself three times in a
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  Speaker 1: singing sort of way, when suddenly he remembered he had
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  Speaker 1: put it into the cunning trap to catch the heffalump bother, said, Pooh.
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  Speaker 4: It all comes of trying to be kind to heffalumps.
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  Speaker 1: And he got back into bed, but he couldn't sleep.
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  Speaker 1: The more he tried to sleep, the more he couldn't.
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  Speaker 1: He tried counting sheep, which is sometimes a good way
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  Speaker 1: of getting to sleep, and as that was no good,
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  Speaker 1: he tried counting heffalumps, and that was worse, because every
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  Speaker 1: hefflump that he counted was making straight for a pot
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  Speaker 1: of Pooh's honey and eating it all. For some minutes,
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  Speaker 1: he lay there miserably, But when the five hundred and
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  Speaker 1: eighty seventh heffalump was licking its jaws and saying to itself,
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  Speaker 1: very good honey.
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  Speaker 2: This.
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  Speaker 4: I don't know when I've tasted.
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  Speaker 1: Better, Pooh could bear it no longer. He jumped out
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  Speaker 1: of bed. He ran out of the house, and he
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  Speaker 1: ran straight to the six pine trees. The sun was
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  Speaker 1: still in bed, but there was a lightness in the
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  Speaker 1: sky over the hundred acre wood, which seemed to show
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  Speaker 1: that it was waking up and would soon be kicking
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  Speaker 1: off the clothes. In the half light, the pine trees
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  Speaker 1: looked cold and lonely, and the very deep pit seemed
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  Speaker 1: deeper than it was. And Pooh's jar of honey at
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  Speaker 1: the bottom was something mysterious, a shape and no more.
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  Speaker 1: But as he got nearer to it, his nose told
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  Speaker 1: him that it was indeed honey, and his tongue came
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  Speaker 1: out and began to polish up his mouth ready for it. Bother,
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  Speaker 1: said Pooh as he got his nose inside the.
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  Speaker 4: Jar, A half a lump has been eating it.
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  Speaker 1: And then he thought a little, and he.
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  Speaker 4: Said, oh, no, I did I forgot.
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  Speaker 1: Indeed he had eaten most of it, but there was
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  Speaker 1: a little left at the very bottom of the jar.
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  Speaker 1: And he pushed his head right in and began to
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  Speaker 1: lick by and by Piglet woke up. As soon as
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  Speaker 1: he woke he said to himself. Oh, Then he said bravely, yes,
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  Speaker 1: and then still more bravely, what so? But he didn't
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  Speaker 1: feel very brave, for the word which was really jiggeting
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  Speaker 1: about in his brain was heffalumps? What was a heflump like?
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  Speaker 1: Was it fierce? Did it come when you whistled, And
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  Speaker 1: how did it come? Was it fond of pigs at all?
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  Speaker 1: If it was fond of pigs, did it make any
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  Speaker 1: difference what sort of pig? Supposing it was fierce with pigs,
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  Speaker 1: would it make any difference if the pig had a
• 15:05
  Speaker 1: grandfather called trespassers? Willyum. He didn't know the answer to
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  Speaker 1: any of these questions. And he was going to see
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  Speaker 1: his first hevlump in about an hour from now. Of course,
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  Speaker 1: who would be with him? And it was much more
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  Speaker 1: friendly with two. But suppose hevlumps were very fierce with
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  Speaker 1: pigs and bears. Wouldn't it be better to pretend that
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  Speaker 1: he had a headache and couldn't go up to the
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: six pine trees this morning? But then suppose that it
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: was a very fine day and there was no hevlump
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  Speaker 1: in the trap here he would be in bed all
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  Speaker 1: the morning, simply wasting his time for nothing. What should
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: he do? And then he had a clever idea. He
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  Speaker 1: would go up very quietly to the six pine trees. Now,
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  Speaker 1: peep very cautiously into the trap and see if there
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  Speaker 1: was a hefflump there, And if there was, he would
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: go back to bed and if there wasn't, he wouldn't,
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  Speaker 1: so off he went. At first he thought that there
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: wouldn't be a hefflump in the trap, and then he
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  Speaker 1: thought that there would, And as he got nearer he
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  Speaker 1: was sure that there would, because he could hear it
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  Speaker 1: heffalumping about it like anything.
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  Speaker 3: Oh dear, oh dear, oh.
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  Speaker 1: Dear, said Piglet to himself, and he wanted to run away,
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  Speaker 1: but somehow, having got so near, he felt that he
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: must just see what a heffalump was like. So he
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: crept to the side of the trap and looked in,
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: and all the time Winnie the Poo had been trying
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: to get the honey jar off his head. The more
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: he shook it, the more tightly it stuck. Bother, he
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  Speaker 1: said inside the jar, and oh help, and mostly ow,
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  Speaker 1: and he tried bumping it against things, but as he
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: couldn't see what he was bumping it against, it didn't
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: help him. And he tried to climb out of the trap,
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: but as he could see nothing but jar, and not
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: much of that, he couldn't find his way. So at
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: last he lifted up his head, jar and all, and
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: made a loud, roaring noise of sadness and despair. And
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  Speaker 1: it was at that moment that Piglet looked down. Help Help,
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  Speaker 1: cried Piglet.
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  Speaker 3: A heufflam, a horrible hefflam.
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  Speaker 1: And he scampered off as hard as he could, still
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  Speaker 1: crying out.
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  Speaker 3: Help help, A horrible hefflim half huff a hella the
• 17:57
  Speaker 3: horrimp hella rump.
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: And he didn't stop crying and scampering until he got
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: to Christopher Robin's house.
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: Whatever's the matter, Piglet.
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  Speaker 1: Said Christopher Robin, who was just getting up. Hef, said Piglet,
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: breathing so hard that he could hardly speak.
• 18:19
  Speaker 3: Eh hef hef h heff A lump where up there?
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: Said Piglet, waving his paw.
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: What did it look like like?
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  Speaker 3: Like? It had the biggest head you've ever saw, Christopher Robin,
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  Speaker 3: A great enormous thing like like nothing a huge big well,
• 18:41
  Speaker 3: like I don't know, like an enormous big nothing like a.
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: Jar well, said Christopher Robin, putting on his shoes.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: I shall go and look at it. Come on.
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  Speaker 1: Piglet wasn't afraid if he had Christopher Robin with him,
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: so off they went.
• 19:00
  Speaker 3: I could hear it, cat, you.
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  Speaker 1: Said Piglet, anxiously as they got near. I can hear something,
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: said Christopher Robin. It was Pooh bumping his head against
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: a tree root he had found there, said Piglet, Isn't
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: it awful? And he held on tight to Christopher Robin's hand.
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: Suddenly Christopher Robin began to laugh, and he laughed, and
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: he laughed and he laughed, And while he was still laughing,
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: crash went the heffelum's head against the tree root. Smesh
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: went the jar, and out came Pooh's head again. Then
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: Piglet saw what a foolish piglet he had been, and
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: he was so ashamed of himself that he ran straight
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: off home and went to bed with a headache. But
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: Christopher Robin and Pooh went home to breakfast together. Oh bear,
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: said Christopher Robin.
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: How I do love you?
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: So do I said Pooh. End of Chapter five