Latest / Arrivals: A Birth Story Podcast / Part II: A dreamy home birth, an AirBnB birth, Isoimmunization, and posterior baby challenges
Transcript
- Merelise: Before we dive into today's episode, I want to talk to you about something incredibly close to my heart, and that's maternal health. I've spoken a lot about my own experiences on this podcast, especially related to mental health, and how important it is to seek help, whether through therapy or medicine. But we all know that's easier said than done. That's where MARE comes in, a virtual maternal health care clinic serving women from preconception through menopause. MARE was founded by a mom, just like you or me. Who struggled to find the support she needed during her own maternal health journey and wanted to create a better experience for other women. MARE brings together therapists, women's health providers, and pelvic floor specialists who understand the unique challenges women face throughout motherhood. MARE believes women deserve care that looks at the whole picture, not just one symptom or one appointment at a time. Book a free 15-minute phone call today and learn more at Mare-4EveryChapter.com. That's Mare M-E-R-E dash for every chapter dot com. Hello and welcome back to the Arrivals Podcast. I'm your host, Mary-Lise Wilson, and you're tuning in for part two of Teresa Palmer's birth stories. Teresa: was so important for me to have them there. And that's why with Prairie's labour, it was at the tail end of COVID. And Merelise Wilson: Mm. Teresa: so at the hospital, I would have just birthed that same way because I've had Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: such positive births through the group practice. their policy at the time was it could only be your husband or your partner plus one other support person. And I was like, but I need all my children. Like I need all my kids around, my mom's here, my friends, like my girlfriend, we're a sisterhood. And then that's actually Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Right. And my girlfriends, yeah. Yes. Teresa: how that informed my choice of to still go through the group practice, but to do it with their home birth, which actually meant I had to get an Airbnb close to the hospital. Merelise Wilson: That's right. That's Teresa: birth in an Merelise Wilson: right. Teresa: Airbnb, but I didn't tell them that I was birthing at their house. I was like, I'm just Merelise Wilson: Did they? Okay, so I'm. Teresa: gonna be closer to the hospital. So that's why I'm getting the Airbnb. Well, they got... Merelise Wilson: Do you think they ever found out? Like, I wondered that when you told this story on your podcast, I was like, what if they like listened to your podcast? Teresa: They probably did by the way, because all my birth photos, had to keep, like as we were prepping the house, like you need to take the art off the walls and replace them with other generic art. I remember going to like the Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: $2 shop and buying like really janky art to put up. So Merelise Wilson: Ha ha! Teresa: it like didn't really look like it could be their house. But I Merelise Wilson: That's so funny. Teresa: will say their garden probably grew really well afterwards because. Merelise Wilson: Hahaha Teresa: Kat, my bestie and daughter, she emptied the birth pool all on their grass. There's like video of her just like emptying the pool with all the like, know, bits and Merelise Wilson: all these nutrients. Teresa: pieces, all the nutrients in her. The placenta juice, mm-mm. I'm sure they had Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: like a very fruitful garden for the next year. my, Merelise Wilson: Yes! That's amazing. Teresa: Yeah, so that was just like such a beautiful, positive, empowering birth and my kids were there. And the other great thing about the group practice is they only have a four hour policy. So after you've given birth, four hours later, you can go home. So they just like Merelise Wilson: Mm. Teresa: have you rest and you know, I think if it's your first baby, use that time just to lie down and rest and establish getting a latch and having nurses Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: there and midwives there who will help make sure the latch is looking good before you go home. obviously for me, I hadn't stopped breastfeeding since Bodhi I'd gone from one to the next into the next. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: So I didn't have to worry about that. But I remember just lying there in bed with Mark after Paul was born and my mom and my friends had taken. the little boys to put them to bed. Cause she was born really late. She was born at 11.30 at night. like started around 7 PM and this was born at like 11.30 on the 12th Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: of April. So my second child to be born on the 12th. then I was pregnant with Prairie. Now with her, with the antibodies for the isoimmunization pregnancy, they did get stronger with her. So Merelise Wilson: Mm. Teresa: I was having to go in every four weeks, I was getting my blood tested to check the levels of the antibodies. I was going in every four weeks to get, she had to get these brain scans through the ultrasound so they could measure the amount of blood in her brain. and she always looked really good. She never looked affected. Even at the very final one, I think I was 38 weeks pregnant. I went in and they said that my, my antibody levels were critical. They're a critical point. Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: and I'm a part of this antibodies like support. group on Facebook. So everyone's just so knowledgeable there. And so we would share like, okay, these were my numbers, what were yours, da da. And so they had asked me, make sure you, it doesn't have to correlate. Like if your numbers are really high, it doesn't necessarily mean that she's becoming anemic. So you need to just see what's the measurement here. And so she went in to get Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: measured her brain and Shit, there was no signs of any distress. Things can turn really quickly. So at 38 and a half weeks, I had been having a bit of prodromal labor. Mark was leaving to go shoot a movie with Jessica Alba. And it was like the biggest job he had got in so long. And they really Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: wanted him on my due date to start working. And I was like, Merelise Wilson: Ugh. Teresa: my God, my God. But how am gonna make sure that I have this baby on time? Anyway, so it got to like 38 plus six and I had had so much prodromal labor and I was manifesting this baby to come. I'm like, come on, come on. And then. The morning of my 39 weeks, I was like, I feel like the baby's gonna come. And I was having a little bit of trickling. And I'm like, I think there's like a slow leak. And Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: I went in to see my midwife and she confirmed this is the slow leak of the waters. And she had me like walking and I just started doing all the things. So I was. I was Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: walking at the beach for hours. remember going and getting a burger with Mark. We went and had Lord of the Fries. We walking up and down at Glenelg Beach Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: and we were just like having so much fun together. I was so excited. I was having my second girl and I was like, oh my God, we're about to have a boy, boy, girl, girl. Plus Isaac at the top of the family like what more could we want? Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: This is unbelievable. Like, ah. And I was just so excited. And then, and she was measuring quite little, like not. just slightly below average. And I Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: remember thinking like, oh, this is gonna be a breeze. Like this labor is gonna be so easy. You know, I'm all set up at this home. She's tiny. She's my fourth, Merelise Wilson: Right, she's little, fourth baby. Yeah. Teresa: like not gonna be a big deal. And Julie had said, baby's posterior, you know, a couple of weeks earlier, but I was so fixated on, I think because in my head I was like, okay, I'm. older now, even though by the way, I wasn't even like I just gave birth at 39, but I was 35. Oh, I was almost 36. Maybe I was 35 and a half when I gave birth to Prairie. And I remember being like, okay, I, you know, I'm not my 27 year old spring chicken, even though now think back and I'm like, oh my God, 35. I was like so young. But I was so like Merelise Wilson: Yeah, you're like, that's a baby. Teresa: focused on I've got to be fit enough to birth at home. I got to be fit. So my whole focus was on fitness. I was like, I was doing stairs. was closing my apple rings every day. I was doing hikes. was doing... So I spent way more time on being fit than Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: making sure the baby was in the right position. And this is one that I'm like, if I could go back to have an easier birth, this is what I would do. I would have... really focused on getting baby into the optimal position, but I didn't. And Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Mmm. Teresa: then the labor was a lot more challenging than I was expecting. I was, it was about like 2 a.m. after the trickle. I'd been confirmed that morning that, okay, yep, that is the water breaking. You'll probably have the baby tonight or whatever. So I went home after doing all the walking all day and then We put all the kids to bed. It was about midnight and I was having some rushes and stuff. so Mark's like, do you wanna just get up? Like, why don't we just get up? Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: I'm like, okay, even though I should really probably try and sleep, but I don't think I can sleep through this. Like they were Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: really pinchy to have like an edge to them. So then we put on this like Paris Hilton cooking show, like the reality show. And Merelise Wilson: Ha! Teresa: we're like sitting on the bounce ball and we're like having such a giggle. We're like, my God, this is so funny. And then they really started ramping up and I'm doing figure of eights. I'm like, okay, yeah, I'm feeling it. All right, this is good. And then I let my birth team know probably around three o'clock. And I think they were at, my midwife arrived around 3.30 AM and the birth photographer, he arrived around that time. And we just started going through it. But then what I started noticing was around like 4 a.m. they were so strong and I was in the shower and I just felt like I wasn't coping the way I was coping with the second and third. And I was like, something just feels Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: so much harder. And then I Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: realized like it was my back. I had it all in my back again. And so then I could not, once I was getting closer and it was ramping up and I was probably about an eight or nine centimeters dilated, I could not survive a wave without having all marks weight pressing into my back. I just could not, I could Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: not do it. And every time it came, I could feel myself panicking like, you've gotta be here. Like, don't leave me. Like Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: I just needed him to be there and push as hard as he could. And he like white knuckled it like that whole, the whole rest of the time of that labor. Merelise Wilson: I hope he'd been working out through the pregnancy. Teresa: my gosh. And it was, and I was in the birth pool, but I was just roaring. I've never ever been that loud ever in labor. Like I just had to. all my way through it. And I remember picturing myself being this lioness in a jungle and I'm letting out the most insane roar and all the animals are like, all that birds like, flight. And I just had this, Merelise Wilson: Gathering. Teresa: yeah, I just had this imagery in my head and I'm like, this is so hard. And I was like looking up at Mark, just thinking like, this is hilarious that I was like. easy breezy fourth birth it's gonna be so chill not my experience at all it was it was my second most challenging of the births Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: and i would say that rushes were even more intense than they were with bodys because i had all these breaks with bodys but it was so Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: much shorter that i wasn't i didn't have the same level of fatigue that i did Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: because bodys was over three days but i Because I didn't sleep the night before because of the water I got excited when there was a trickle So the night before Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: I didn't sleep and now we're we're laboring through the night. This is now my second night without sleep So I am really tired and it's just taking it out of me and I remember looking at Julie like I must have been really close to transition But I kept feeling up and I couldn't quite feel the head yet and I was like I think I have a cervical lip and she was like I, doesn't seem like you do. I don't think you do. And I was like, I do. I definitely do. And she was like, would it make you feel better to get out of the pool? And I can check. And I was like, yes, please. And she's like another Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Teresa: mother to me. And she was like soothing me and soothing me. And then she checked and she was like, there's no lip. You just got to get her down. She's like, she is posterior. So you just got to work really hard. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: You're going to grind your hips. You're going to rock. You're going to push. You're Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: going to scream, do whatever you can to get her down. And the work that went into getting her under the pelvic bone, it was about five contractions. Like I don't think in my birth journeys so far I've ever had to work that hard to get her down to that spot. Merelise Wilson: Mm. Teresa: But I remember I would put my finger up each time and just feel her coming further and further down. could feel her getting closer. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: And I just knew, I was like, my gosh, I am there. And then the fetal ejection took over. I remember that feeling, Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: that sweet relief. And then it goes from the back. I didn't feel it in the back anymore. She Merelise Wilson: Yes. Yeah. Teresa: moved out of that way. So I wasn't feeling that, that counter pressure where, you know, just your, the whole coccyx bone is like being bent up. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Teresa: that had gone and it was such sweet relief that then the pushing part was just so fun. It was just so fun Merelise Wilson: Yes. Teresa: and I could put my hand down there and I could feel her little head getting closer and closer into my hand and I was like stroking her head and yeah, I could feel a little hair and I like that, I just didn't even have a ring of fire. She was so little. was, I just had to. Merelise Wilson: Yeah, Teresa: just breathe her out and I did my usual breath technique and she just came out and I'm just so elated that it was Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: just the feeling of she's here, she's safe, she cried immediately, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: belted out in fact, which is her true nature. She's my wild girl and she just belted out Merelise Wilson: I love it. Teresa: this little tiny person with this big voice. and she was just so gorgeous and so perfect and I was utterly exhausted like I just oh my Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: gosh I was so exhausted I could barely even get out of the pool with her I felt like I was just gonna pass out and fall asleep right there and I remember Julie being Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: like we do we do have to birth the placenta and I was like oh god we do don't we and luckily I hadn't had I had a normal third stage with Forest and with Forest I remember they put the cannula in thinking that they might have to give me pitocin Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: because I had a retained placenta with Bodhi but no the placenta came out fine with Poet it came out fine with Prairie I was like I can't be bothered getting this placenta out I literally am so Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: tired I do not want to do this I remember just being like god okay fine So I got on the birth store and I was like, I pushed in it and it came out. And then I just like curled up in the couch with the baby. But then she, Julie who is on the side of caution, she was like, and the midwife stays with you, obviously stays and checks the baby. And I think it was about an hour after birth. She was like, you know, she's about one degree under what I would love, what I love to see. And like she is probably Merelise Wilson: Temperature wise. Teresa: temperature wise. And she was like, I would just, I'd feel much better about us just making sure since you had the isoimmunization thing, do you mind if, you know, can we go and make sure she's totally fine? We'll just. just make sure she's okay. And then you can come straight home if everything's fine. And I loved that she did that because we ended up going to the hospital. I remember I was so tired. I could barely walk. I just was like, wow, I've worked so Merelise Wilson: my god, delirious. Teresa: hard, delirious. And they put her in the little humidity crib and they basically just warmed her up for about five hours. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: And she was just this teeny tiny little, she was like, six pounds three, no, that's not right. She was six pounds seven, but I had had bigger babies. All my babies were Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: eight pounds or over. And yeah, Merelise Wilson: wow, that's a big. Teresa: so she was like a lot smaller. And I thought that maybe it had something to do with the isoimmunization. But then afterwards, when we looked at my placenta, I actually had a massive fatty deposit on my placenta, like a whole chunk of the placenta. that wasn't giving her nutrients. And I won, I've never had that before. And in fact, Julie's like, I actually Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: haven't seen this before. And Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: I was like, I wonder if it's just like a part of the placenta was deformed, but she Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: was so little. And anyway, they warmed her up and I slept on these really uncomfortable plastic chairs next to her. And I just passed out and Mark ordered me some Uber Eats. I was so unbelievably exhausted, but I just sat with her and nursed her and the doctor was like, she's totally fine, but you know, we'll warm her up and then you guys can go home. I was like, okay. And yeah, and then we just went home and had this little love bubble and moved out of our Airbnb a couple of days later, cleaned it all up, put it back to the way Merelise Wilson: I can't. Teresa: it was. And then, yeah. Merelise Wilson: cracks me up. Teresa: my God. pretty funny. And then, you know, that was it. That was her experience and our experience birthing and it was just so beautiful. But also too, it was wild card, you know, to have a fourth birth, be like that. I do blame myself for that though, because I was just being too lazy. I just didn't do the work. I was just like, whatever. I think I got to, I was just like, I'm sorry, I got this. I know how to birth. Merelise Wilson: I'm a pro. Teresa: And it just, yeah, I am a pro. It's gonna be so easy. And Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: then it was actually just quite a good reminder that birth is unpredictable. It doesn't matter how many times you've done it. It's Merelise Wilson: No. Teresa: gonna always be different. And then of course it informed my next experience with Lotus because I was like, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: and I will not ever get lazy again. This baby is gonna be in Merelise Wilson: now. Teresa: the best position possible. I am not. doing posterior birth again. Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Before we talk about Lotus, you mentioned that when you started pushing with Prairie, it was like this relief. And that has always been my experience too. Like I would take pushing the pushing phase all day over the laboring phase. And so Teresa: Yeah. Yeah. Merelise Wilson: I'm just curious for you, like, what are, what are your favorite coping mechanisms during like the laboring phase? Teresa: Yeah, it depends on which birth, but I always use two things in particular. Crushed ice is my favorite thing to chew on, to rub on my body, to have on my forehead. just, I ice, I use ice so much, but the crushed, the small little balls of ice. I pre, Merelise Wilson: The La Pellet. Teresa: yes, I pre-prep. ice in Ziploc bags in my freezer, I'll have like 50 Ziploc bags of ice so that my birth Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: support team can go to the freezer and go get more ice. And I either am scooping it up and rubbing it on my belly or I'm scooping it up and eating it, or I'm putting it on my face, Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: like just putting my face in it. I use ice so much. and then the other thing I use is pre-frozen Flannels or what you would call a face wash face wash face washcloth. That's it Merelise Wilson: Yes. Watch clock. Watch clock. Yeah. Teresa: and I so I wet it with water I put my essential oils on it and then I zip lock and I put it in the freezer and I have Merelise Wilson: I did the same thing. Teresa: did you? good. It's the best. Like having Merelise Wilson: Yes, the best. Teresa: the cold scent and you're sniffing it and it smells Merelise Wilson: Yes. Teresa: so good. You got to be careful not to get it in your eyes though, because I have had that experience too. Merelise Wilson: Yes! Teresa: I vocalize. I like a Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: low vocalization, like really low and like Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: vibrational. I use that. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: But then I also like, do the soft, like the high pitched as well. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: So I will often change from the like the sweet size into the really like low vibrational stuff. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: So vocalization I use all the time Visualization is a huge one. I visualize Merelise Wilson: you Teresa: I remember with forest being in the bath I was visualizing these waves coming and I was like riding these waves with power I've Visualized her Merelise Wilson: Yes. Yes. Teresa: face. I I just was looking at her face and like reaching out for her It's funny though visualization that I Merelise Wilson: you Teresa: used with Prairie was really different. It wasn't like, way, so the face of my baby, because it was so intense, it was like Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: lioness. That was what I visualized. Merelise Wilson: Bye. Teresa: I really became this like lioness in that birth. And that's the sort of strength that I needed to bring her down when she was in that funky position. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: So yeah, visualization, vocalization. Merelise Wilson: you Teresa: flannels, ice and then the thing and I'll talk about this more Merelise Wilson: you Teresa: when I talk about Lotus's birth, but like Wow, this was such a game changer for me. You know how I've talked about Mark having to do counter pressure with my two posterior births something Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: that I found amazing, which I'm guessing is probably how the TENS machine works is in this last birth I loved a very very high powered back massaging gun. It was like one of those, Merelise Wilson: like a fair gun? Teresa: yeah, like one that's like, like that just smashes into you. my God, that was Merelise Wilson: Yeah. So smart. Teresa: amazing. So I just had Mark at the back of my back with it on full, like the highest power possible. And it was just smashing into my tailbone. and all over my back like that. The whole labor with Lotus. I couldn't get through the contractions without having my massage gun. But that was, yes, exactly. Merelise Wilson: That's the best idea. I've never thought of that. Cause then that saves like your partner. like they get exhausted, like doing all the counter pressure, but the Theragun can just like do it for them. That's genius. Teresa: It does, it's exactly right. Like, and just, felt, it felt amazing. I even put it on light when I was feeling it wrapped at the, I even put it on light, like down on my pelvic bone, down across my bones here, like my hip bones. But I didn't do it as intense because obviously the baby's at the front there. So I had it lighter, Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: but even if it's just like a distraction, that was excellent. But those, are really the only things and the music of course. and the one other Merelise Wilson: Yeah, I was gonna say. Teresa: thing I used this time was a birth sling. I used a birth sling Merelise Wilson: yes! Teresa: and it's called the birth sling. And Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: I used that with Lotus and I had it, I just like put all my weight into this sling so I could roll and move and people have used that for hundreds of years, like holding onto things Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: and. You know, I just love the movement. if you Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: have audience members listening, I would really recommend packing one of those massage guns, but also having a birth sling that you can bring to Merelise Wilson: you Teresa: your birth center or have at home wherever you're birthing or in the hospital room and just setting it up. Birth ball, Merelise Wilson: you Teresa: obviously you need, I find that so helpful. But then you can just have your Merelise Wilson: yeah. Teresa: little setup off to the side and then your birth support team can hand you the different things and it kind of gets your mind off of it because you're like, okay, this time around I'm trying this one. Okay, now I'm going to move on to this thing. Now, you know, it keeps you occupied. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yes, I love that. the visualization, like the writing, the waves, the music, all of it. I remember in my first labor, there was a King's of Leon song. And part of the chorus is like, I'm not going to sing it because. I'm not gonna sing it, but he talks about riding the waves and I remember in my first labor, that song popped into my head. It was on our labor playlist and I was just Teresa: Mmm. Merelise Wilson: like, I just played it in my head over and over and I was just like, the wave, ride the wave. So yeah. Teresa: my gosh, that's so funny because there was a Kid Cudi song and Scott who is Kid Cudi, his name's Scott Mascotti and so Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: his rapper name is Kid Cudi. There's Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: this song that is talking about keep going one step forward, keep going, keep going. And Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: that became like an anthem for me during Prairie's Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: birth. And then I used it again with Lotus. I used that in his song, Mr. Rager. And because he's a good friend of us. Mark was filming me in the middle of labor with the song on and I'm like, I was like, hi Scott. Like Merelise Wilson: Ha Teresa: singing to his song. Mark said to Tim, he's like, Merelise Wilson: So funny. Teresa: guys, this means so much. Yeah, was so funny. Yeah. Merelise Wilson: Yeah, I love that. Teresa: Yeah. So. Yeah, one last birth. Prairie was tough. No, Merelise Wilson: So prayer was tough. Prayer was tough, but you decided you wanted to keep going. Teresa: she, yes, yes I did. Prairie was tough. It's so funny because she was so much smaller than everyone. And she was my fourth and she was really challenging. I mean, I'd put her Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: on par with She's not as challenging as Bodie's birth. There's no way. mean, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: that was a three day situation. But Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: yeah, just in terms of the... intensity. That one was intense. But beautiful, Merelise Wilson: Yes. Yes. Teresa: of course. And then with Lotus. My best birth, as you know, since you've heard on the podcast. My Merelise Wilson: Mmm... Yes. Teresa: dreamiest McDreamy dreamy dreamy birth. Merelise Wilson: Ugh. Teresa: Oh my God, my dreamiest birth ever. Merelise Wilson: goals. Teresa: Goals. Oh, and do you know what's so funny? Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: Sarah's fourth birth was by far her hardest, but I was at her first birth Merelise Wilson: Yes. Teresa: as well, and that was really challenging for her too. She had like Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: four hours of pushing with her first baby. Merelise Wilson: Yes. Teresa: And I remember being like, I cannot do this. I have PTSD, I can't do that. And I was Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: pregnant with Bodie at her birth. And I was like, cool. I'm just, well, I'll just have them take this out of the sun roof and we'll be good. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: So then it's funny because I had in my mind, Sarah has just had this unbelievably challenging fourth birth. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: And like my fourth birth, yeah, it was hard, but it was a home birth. was, nothing was, Merelise Wilson: Right. It's all relative. Yeah. Teresa: too challenging, you know, it was just intense. It's all, yeah. And then Sarah has this really, really, really hard fourth birth. And so in my mind, I'm like, is that what's gonna happen to me? Like, am I also Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: gonna have a really challenging fifth birth? Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Teresa: And I just, anytime I had the wobble come up, and I think pregnancy after loss, you're already vulnerable. Like Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: there is a vulnerability, like, I just have to make it to this part of the pregnancy and then it's fine. And then I have to make it Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: through this part and then it's okay. just as long as the baby's viable and I can get past 24 weeks and Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: I should be okay. So I was sort of like this pregnancy was, it was the most miraculous, beautiful thing and Lotus is the greatest gift that has ever happened. I mean, all the children are, but you know, after you've lost a baby and I had a pregnancy loss the year before I got pregnant with Lotus. you feel there's the part of it, it's like, I ever gonna get to have this experience again? And then when I got Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: pregnant with Lotus and everything was fine and the tests were fine and she was healthy and it just like, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: it felt like such a gift from God, from the universe, however you like Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: to label that higher power. And I Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: just was trying so hard. to call in the most positive, beautiful, incredible birthing situation. it Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: seems like it was gonna change. I was having a home birth in Byron Bay and Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: I was like 30, no, I was over 40 weeks. I was 40 plus three or something. And I went Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Teresa: for a checkup because of this isoimmunization thing, but the most... miraculous thing was that, and no one can explain why this happened, but I didn't have any antibodies this pregnancy. And that doesn't happen. So it gets worse and worse with each baby. So Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: with Forest, the antibodies were triggered and they stayed really low. With Poet, they stayed low, but slightly higher than Forest. With Prairie, they started low and then they got higher and they got to critical level. And then so with Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: loaders and then with the miscal, the baby that I lost, my antibodies were with that baby as well. And then with Merelise Wilson: bright. Teresa: the fifth, zero antibodies. Merelise Wilson: And that's wild because you had even like thought about like pursuing like an IVF route, right? Like you had like, like gone so far as to like, yeah. Teresa: Exactly. Yeah, so after I lost the baby and they were like, you did have, I lost the baby around 11 weeks. So I had been tested already for antibodies and I had antibodies and then the Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: baby passed away, not in any relation to the antibodies, but the baby had Down syndrome and passed away in utero. And then I found out my 12 week scan and I remember like a part of my going through the loss of that baby it was like how can I fix this? All right so if I want to have another baby I'm going to fix this and the doctor said that they recommend IVF so that's what I'm going to do and the Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: reason they recommended IVF was so that my antibodies don't keep jumping up if I have another pregnancy loss. They're like you know if we know that the baby's 100 % healthy and your antibodies jump up at least it's a healthy baby and you know, here to use his words, we're not wasting antibody increase on a baby that you don't get to bring home with you. And Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Yeah. Teresa: it sounded very practical to me. So I was like, that makes sense. That's the plan. That's what we're gonna do. Type A personality, did the IVF, got the healthy embryos, put them on ice and then we were planning to Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: use those. And then of course we got pregnant. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: just on our own, know, doing the old fashioned deed. Merelise Wilson: Hahaha Teresa: so, you know, leading up into the birth, I just was already feeling so much magic around this baby and Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: gratitude. And at like 40 plus three weeks, I went in for a scan, everything looked fine, but the baby had what they called the baby tacky. which meant it had quite a fast heart rate and then monitored Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: me for hours. was being monitored. It was just meant to be a routine scan. Like, all right, checking, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: you you're of advanced maternal age now and we just wanna Merelise Wilson: Great. Teresa: check on the baby. You've gone past dates, like we're just gonna check on you. And then the baby's heart Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: rate was like quite high. So then they suddenly were like, no, Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: we haven't been able to find a baseline for this baby. Like why can't we find its baseline? The heart rate is so high, it's meant to come down to find a baseline, but they just couldn't find that. And Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: so they started saying like, maybe the baby's telling us something. And of course I'm in my head and I'm like, my gosh, I was thinking about stillbirth. And I was like, Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: what do I do? they're like, recommendation is for you to stay in the hospital today. We'll break your waters since you've had prodromal labor anyway, which is that stop start labor leading up to the actual day of labor. You know, we'll break your borders. You'll stay, you'll do the birth center, which is the group practice. I could just move into their Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: group practice, have the baby in the water at the hospital at Lismore and Bob's your uncle. That was it. That was the plan. Merelise Wilson: Hahaha Teresa: And I was like, oh, and I remember my home birth midwife, Libby, met me at the hospital and I kept being like, I don't, I don't know what to do. Like I don't, like, I guess if this is what this, recommendation and Libby was just like, I know, yeah, like really holding the space for me. And Julie had Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: flown in my other midwife who I'd had for all the other babies. She was, her and Libby were living together. They were staying together. Merelise Wilson: Aww, cute. Teresa: as the two midwives together for the baby. It was so cute. And Merelise Wilson: Aww. Teresa: Libby and Julie were like, well, what do you want it? Like, how do you feel? What do you want to do? And I was like, all right, okay, cool. Change your plan. Like we'll just have the baby here. If the baby's got this high heart rate, like I don't want to go home and risk something happening just because I Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: want to have a home birth. And they were like, the kids can be in here. So they moved me over to the birth suite. They're like, all right, in an hour we'll come and break your waters. I was like, okay. And I'm like, okay, Mark, bring everything here. We're having the baby here now. You're have to go get my whole birth stuff. Like I bought, I'd Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: been given this birth pool that was just blown and that wasn't gonna get used. Like anyway, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: so they brought me over there. That was a plan. And then they tested the baby again. And suddenly the baby's heart rate was back down again at Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: a normal rate. And they're like, What it'd been three hours with a high heart rate. And then suddenly the baby was back down again. They had given me a drip at that time and given me fluids. And I actually earlier Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: in the pregnancy, I had like an iron infusion as well, cause I had really low iron. And so they just sort of hydrated me with a drip and then the heart rate was fine again. And so then Libby's like, well, what do you want to do? You've now made the decision to be here. Should we go back and like do the, should we just have the home birth? What do you want to do? And I was like, what if the baby's fine? Let's just wait. So she was like, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: okay. And I was like, tomorrow, why don't we do a stretch and sweep? And she was like, okay, go. So Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: I was like, false alarm, we're going back home. So Merelise Wilson: Hahaha Teresa: we went home. That night I like was feeling. quite a few rushes and stuff and I was like, oh, okay, Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: this is feeling good. Like I think it's days away. And that was on a Thursday or Wednesday maybe. And here, me check my calendar just so that Merelise Wilson: Yeah Teresa: I know for sure. So I get this right. So she was born, yes, on the Friday. And I went on the Wednesday, the 17th of September, I went in. And I was like, okay, cool. Like she's gonna be born tonight. And then after we made that decision, we went back home. And then I went to bed and I slept pretty well, but then I kind of got woken up and I was like, I'm feeling, I'm feeling some feelings. And so then I remember on that Thursday, the day before I gave birth, Uh, Julie and Libby came over together and they checked on me and, they did a stretch. Libby did a stretch and sweep for me. And so Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: she did the stretch and sweep and I was like, Oh, okay. That feels, that feels like there's stuff going. And she was like, you're already three and a half centimeters dilated. Like, I think this baby is very close. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: So then they left and maybe five hours later, my water broke at nighttime. was talking to Bodie and was like, My water just broke and I was like, my God, my water broke and Bodie like jumped off and down so excited. was like, my God, mom's water broke, mom's water broke. We're just like yelling. And Merelise Wilson: Aww. Teresa: we got really excited. We texted the midwives and said, all right, game on. I think the water's broken. Like, I'll let you know. And it just kept like trickling and stuff. And then by, by kind of 11, it had all. and I decided to go to bed and I actually got a little bit of sleep that night, which is unlike me. I just made myself sleep. was like, you're Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Yeah. Teresa: going to sleep. This baby will be here tomorrow. You're going to sleep. So I actually got a bit of sleep, but then was woken up around 3 a.m. ish and then just started these like beautiful kind of softer contractions and I, no. Yeah, by like 3am. Yeah, by like 3am I was in the shower and I was having these contractions and then I could feel them after like the sixth contraction in the shower, I could really feel them ramping up. And I was like, all Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: right, cool. Let's call the women and let them know that this is happening. So we called them at three, we're like, you can go back to sleep, but just so you know, like it's happening. And they're Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: like, okay, cool. And they're like, call us when you're really struggling through them. And so I think we ended up calling or Mark called them. I kept being like, don't, don't let them sleep, let them sleep. I don't want you to, don't call them. And he was like, I am not delivering this baby. We are making sure that we're calling Merelise Wilson: No. Teresa: them. And Forrest was at a sleepover at his best friend's house that night. we, Merelise Wilson: That's right. Teresa: yes, we also had to call Mick who's Jess, who's dazed but amazed who we had on Merelise Wilson: Yes. Teresa: our. podcast like this is this is Jess's Merelise Wilson: Yes. Teresa: son we had to call Mick and have Mick drive Forest so he didn't miss the birth drive for wake Forest up in the middle of the night drive Forest and dash to drop Forest Merelise Wilson: Aww. Teresa: off to us and I remember the midwives came about 4 a.m. and I had been in the shower you know doing all my stuff but Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: I was in this intergalactic world. was not, I was barely in my body. I was out Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: in the stars. I was in the universe. was Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: out, was, I was picturing swimming through the stars, this lotus flower blooming open, blooming open. And I remember Merelise Wilson: you Teresa: I was looking at the two plaques, the two names. And I had lotus for a boy and lotus for a girl, but just different. Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: different middle names. I was looking at the two plaques up there and I'm in the middle of it and I look up at the Lotus Bloom plaque and I was like, this is Lotus Bloom. I think this is Lotus Bloom. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: And it was the first time in my whole pregnancy that I thought I was having a girl. That first moment, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: the whole time, like this is my boy, like I'm having a boy. And then in the middle of labor, I've never had a surprise. My first surprise, it was so cool. Merelise Wilson: And because y'all, this was the first surprise you'd had, right? Yeah, this is the first one. Yeah. Teresa: I will definitely do that again. if I have another baby. it's the best. I'm obsessed. It's so good. Merelise Wilson: I've only done surprises. It's the best. I know. Teresa: But then I just had that moment of like, my God, this is Lotus Bloom. And I remember looking at the Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: plaque, like this just feels right. It feels right. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: you know, Julie came and like put her arms around me and was talking to me and just being a beautiful. loving, maternal self, and they're just such beautiful midwives. And the pairing of them, they were so perfect together. They're just like chill and not like in my face or they just would check Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: on the baby. Oh, that's okay. Then I moved into the kitchen on the birth sling. And then I really started needing that massage gun on my back. And every contraction, I had the massage gun on my back or I would have it at the front down below. like on my hip bones, like that felt really good. And you know, I was then using ice a lot. And Bodie brought me a flannel, one of the cold flannels, and he was in the background putting eucalyptus on it because he had been told that that was his role. And he gave it to me and I was like, thank you. And I put it on my face and immediately Merelise Wilson: No. Teresa: like burnt my eyeballs out like, And then he was like, my God, I'm so sorry. I know. Merelise Wilson: It's a good distraction technique, you know, you're like, oh, and all of a sudden my contractions aren't so bad. Teresa: I'm laughing and I've got burnt eyes and then I see Mick pulling up with the Merelise Wilson: Awwww. Teresa: forest with the lights, like kind of waving through the window and I was like, my God, this is such a comedy of errors. And then Bodie's like shoving ice at me and at this point I'm just grabbing handfuls of ice and putting them on my eyeballs, like trying to get the eucalyptus out of my eyeballs. I'm like, my God. And then I decided that I needed ice on my stomach at the front. So I would just grab handfuls Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: and put them on my stomach. And I was like, my God. then, and then I kept saying to Libby, should I get in the water? And she was like, do you think you should get in the water? And I Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: was like, I don't know. Libby, should I get in the water? And they're like, if you want to get in the water. And then, I was like, I'm getting in the water. So I just decided I was getting in the water. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: And then I was like rolling around. It felt really like buoyant in there. I loved the feeling of being in Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: there. I'm so glad I stayed. of the water, even though I was in the bath a bit and I was in the shower. I was in the bath earlier in the labor and I was in the shower sort of in the middle point and then I really Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: utilized the birth sling probably from like seven to nine centimeters. I was just Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: on, you know, really moving and putting my weight in that birth sling. And then I was like, okay, I'm moving into the birth pool for just this last period. And I think sometimes what happens is that people get in the birth pool too soon and they get Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: the relief and they relax and then it doesn't ramp up as it kind of can slow things down. So I Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: always knew that I had to get in the water like as later on in the labor as possible. So I... Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: got in and just the sweet, I was like kind of bouncing around on the bottom of the inflatable pool. I was like, oh, this feels so good. Like, okay, I love this. Holding onto the handles and I put like fairy lights around and it was now Merelise Wilson: Ugh. Teresa: around 5.30 AM and everyone was up and the kids were just getting snacks and just, you know, running around. Our birth photographer was there, Jerusha. She came around the same time as my midwives and she was just snapping photos and video and she's Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: just remarkable woman. They all have such incredible energies, all three of my birth support team. Merelise Wilson: Yes. Yeah. Teresa: I didn't have my best friend this time because she was back in Adelaide with her kids. so it's just like my mom and all the kids, Mark and then these three women. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: And I remember feeling like I could feel where her head was. And I kept telling everyone, I was like, okay, she's a finger length away. All right, after, and then I'll have a contraction. Really like do my omming through and then I'm like, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: okay, she's this far away now. Okay, she's this far away until she was right at the very edge. And then I had all my kids gather around and I was like ecstatic, staring at them all and I was like, guys, this is it. This is the moment where. to meet our baby and then I could I could feel like she was just about and I didn't know it was just the baby to me at the time didn't know it was a boy or girl Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: and then I was like do you guys want to get in the pool and they're all like what? Ew. No. No. None of us want to get in pool and I was like Prairie what about you? Do you to get in the pool? You can't your baby. She was like no and I realized oh Merelise Wilson: Good, I'm good. Teresa: yeah I've been like shitting in the pool and there's like blood and bits and pieces. And it's like, of Merelise Wilson: I know, there's like blood, yeah. Teresa: course I don't want to go to the pool. And then I know it was so, it Merelise Wilson: It was a beautiful thought. It was a beautiful thought. Teresa: was so funny. I was like, okay, cool. Like I'll get on with it. And then as, Merelise Wilson: Hahaha Teresa: as I was about to like push her head out, Rufus to Soul in a Bloom, Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: my favorite track in all the land comes on. Merelise Wilson: Yes. Teresa: And this has been like, such a magical, expansive, abundant song for our family. And it comes Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: on, because the playlist is on shuffle, comes on. And then I just had this feeling of like, bloom, this is, this is Lotus Bloom. This Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: is my girl. This is a girl. And then I pushed and her head came out. And then I was like looking up at the kids and I was like, are you sure you don't want to come in? No. And I was like, heads out guys, the heads out. And then I could feel around the neck. I could feel the cord quite tight around the neck. Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: And then I just like kind of went into my type A mode where I looked at Libby and Julia, I said cords around the neck. And then I was like, I'll take it off. I'll take it off in this next contraction. And they're like, okay. So then I push her out again. And actually it's funny, the stretching, was doing the breath work, the stretching Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: felt really different this time. I felt much like it felt like a real stretch. I could feel it a little bit burnier than what I remember. I don't remember Poet's Head feeling that stretch. I did with Bodhi. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: Forest, don't remember feeling that. Poe, I don't remember feeling that. Prairie, I didn't feel anything. She had such a tiny head. But with Lodis, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: I was like, my gosh, her head feels big. Like she feels bigger. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: And then, you know, I took, with the push, she came out under the water and I just unraveled the cord straight away and went one, two, unlooped it and Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: then pulled her up and then like, my God. And then. opened her legs straight away and was like, it's a girl. I just screamed, was like, it's a Merelise Wilson: You Teresa: girl. I just started being like, my God, you're a girl. And I'm like, I cannot Merelise Wilson: Ugh. Teresa: believe you are a girl. And then what I didn't notice, really, what I sort of noticed, she was pretty floppy. So she hadn't really Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: come into her body yet. Like she had her eyes open and she was looking up at me, but she wasn't crying. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: She wasn't in the cut. She wasn't the color she's meant to be at that point. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: And I'm just like still like, my God, like laughing about a girl. Can you believe that? Merelise Wilson: I did it! Yeah. Teresa: And they were all like a girl, what? No one thought it was a girl apart from the girls. The girls Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: thought it was a girl. We all thought that this was a little boy. And so I'm still like, my God. And then. I can, look at clock marks face and I can see he's got a like he's worried look on and then I'm Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: like, oh, I'm like, is she okay? Is she okay? And then they're like, yeah, she's okay. And then so I start blowing in her face. I'm like moving her Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Teresa: and like, um, you know, grabbing her like this, like pulling her arms a bit to Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: try and like bring her back into her body a bit more. And then, uh, Libby, Julie says to Libby like, should we, and Julie's like, I'm getting the oxygen. And so she goes and gets the Merelise Wilson: Mm. Teresa: oxygen and then they put, and I was like, do you need to take her? And they're like, no, no, no, we'll just do it on you. And they're like, she just needs a Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: couple of breaths. She's here, her heart rate's fine, her pulse is fine. Like Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: we'll just put the oxygen on. And so then they put little oxygen mask on her and they gave her two breaths and then she just came into her. I just saw her pink up and into her body. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Teresa: And not once did I feel afraid in that Merelise Wilson: Mm. Teresa: moment that there was, that there really was something wrong with her because I'm the birthing mother, so I can feel, even when she had the cord around her neck tightly under the water, I could feel her moving, her head was moving around. I could feel that Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Teresa: she was moving. So it's not like she was unconscious. Rasmar, it's so much harder I think for the partner because they are removed from it. They're not in the body. They don't have the knowing. don't. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: So he's just watching this tiny little baby be born, having to get oxygen on her face. And Merelise Wilson: Right. Teresa: I think that it was so beautiful in that I just had such a knowing that she was okay. but also watching Merelise Wilson: Yeah Teresa: these two really experienced, both of them in their 60s, like these midwives who've done this a million times, zero panic, no fear, no worry, just efficiency. Just like, we'll get the thing, we'll do the thing, never Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Teresa: panicked. Like nothing. And I remember afterwards being like, was that scary for you? Was that like bad? And they're like, no. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: What people don't Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: understand about home birth is that these same things happen in the hospital where like the baby needs a bit of oxygen. Like the oxygen Merelise Wilson: her. Teresa: is right there and she got the oxygen and Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: she had the two puffs and she was totally fine. And they are watching the baby like a hawk, making sure even Merelise Wilson: Great. Teresa: in all my elation and screaming out, it's a girl and all that sort of stuff. They are Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: laser focused on baby and baby's color and where the baby's at and that feeling her heart rate, her heart rate was normal and stable. It's just she hadn't had Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: that big first breath yet. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Teresa: And then that was that. And she like pinked up crying, but I was still, she was like crying, but I was still like doing the pinching stuff and then like, she's good, she's good now, Merelise Wilson: Yeah, you're good. Teresa: like you don't need to. And I was like, and I was sucking the snot out of her. Merelise Wilson: Mm. Teresa: putting my whole mouth over her mouth and sucking all the gunk out and spitting it into the water. I probably did that like, yes, I was. Cause she was Merelise Wilson: You're like full primal mommy animal, like full on. Teresa: rattly. I could hear that she was rattly. just, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: you know, they do the, when the baby comes down the birth canal, like they get the squeeze of all the gunk and the Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: stuff and the amniotic fluid leftover and all that. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: So I could, I was. sucking it out of her and spitting it into the water. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: It was so, cause I've seen other women Merelise Wilson: Yeah Teresa: do that in birth videos before and I was like, this is probably why she was struggling to like get her first breath. She was so like congested with all this crap. Like I'm just going to get this all out of her. So I was so, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's badass. I love it. Teresa: it was so funny, but yeah, it was beautiful. And then kids were laughing and so excited. Merelise Wilson: Ugh. Teresa: They all wanted to hold her and I birthed the or before I birthed the placenta I started trying to FaceTime my friends and they're like, darling, you haven't finished birthing yet. You still have to birth the placenta. was like, yeah, I forgot about that. Ha ha ha. And then I just like, that was easy. I didn't even have a contraction Merelise Wilson: So that was easy as him. Yeah. Yeah. Teresa: then I just like manually pushed it out. My contractions had stopped Merelise Wilson: Yeah, just push it out. Teresa: at that point. But yeah, so that was the dreamiest dream birth of Lotus Bloom Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: Palmer. and heaven just Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Teresa: having the kids around. It was so beautiful. And then of course I released my birth video and it Merelise Wilson: Yes. Teresa: went everywhere. It like I put it out and someone recognized me here in Vancouver the other day from my birth video. She was like, Merelise Wilson: Really? Teresa: I think I saw, she didn't know I was an actress. She doesn't know I have a podcast, nothing. She was like, I... Merelise Wilson: Yeah. I saw your birth... Teresa: I think I saw your birth video. I watched your birth video. And I was like, yeah. Yeah, it was so cool. Merelise Wilson: So funny. I mean, it was so beautiful. I, Teresa: Mmm. Merelise Wilson: I mean, first of all, hearing your birth stories, I'm like, okay, I think I need to do this again. I'm not really going to do it again, but it's like, just Teresa: Yes you do. Merelise Wilson: want to have like more, like I always tell people, I'm like, I think I'm crazy because I just want to keep giving birth. I don't necessarily want to be pregnant and I don't necessarily want to like have a million kids, but I just like, every time I hear a birth story like this, I'm like, I want to give birth again. Do you know that feeling? It's like, god, so cool. Teresa: Oh my God, it's such a remarkable, profound experience. It is the best Merelise Wilson: It is. Teresa: thing in life. And I felt so empowered afterwards. I was like, I am so strong. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: Women are incredible. It was, it was. Merelise Wilson: It's amazing. It's the most natural high. like, and I hear like, like the way you did something, I'm like, I want to try that. Like, you know, it's like, it's just so cool. Teresa: Yeah, yeah. was, I was, and you know, even though I've done it so many times now, like, I just, remember in the lead up to Lotus's birth, I was on the home birth, all the home birth sites, like reading stories, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Teresa: like, she tried that. I'll try this. my gosh. I haven't even thought about that. Like, maybe I'll do that. Merelise Wilson: Yeah Teresa: You know, you can always like gather information and yeah, it's so, it was just. They're the best times in my life. I've had the Merelise Wilson: amazing. Teresa: best, most fun experiences and also wild and intense and hard and sometimes not Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: going to plan. But really, yeah, just Merelise Wilson: all the things. Teresa: all the things, my favorite days of my life. Merelise Wilson: that's so special. I remember you said like, so you mentioned that you watched a bunch of videos, a bunch of videos. And I think that's so helpful because you mentioned when you, when you were birthing Lotus and the, you felt that the cord was wrapped around her neck and you just like calmly undid it yourself. And Teresa: Mmm. Merelise Wilson: I've seen that done so many times in birth videos. And I'm wondering if that's how you knew Teresa: Yeah. Merelise Wilson: how to do it. none of your other kids had had that before. Teresa: No, I just have seen it in birth videos. I've read about it. I just, you know, and I've heard other people tell those stories. Like I just undid the cord and I remember just Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: being like, okay, I just go one, two and I just take it off. Yeah. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. And I think it's so beautiful too, when she was born, cause when my first was born, he wasn't breathing. And I think he kind of had like a bit of a stunned birth situation and I was in a hospital and so Teresa: Was it fast? Merelise Wilson: they, no, it was really slow, but he'd been stuck for a long time. So I think he was kind of like, you know, it was just, yeah. Teresa: stunned. Merelise Wilson: Yes, exactly. He was like, I'm finally here. and we were in a hospital and so they took him away from me and they like cut the umbilical cord really quickly and. And then he started breathing really quickly on his own, but then they took him away because of protocol and blah, blah, blah. And so anyways, I just think it's so beautiful that like you had that experience where it like could have been so much scarier, but it didn't need to be. And they Teresa: Mmm. Merelise Wilson: addressed everything like right there with her still on your body, like no need to cut the cord. Teresa: Yeah. Merelise Wilson: Like we'll just do a little bit of this, a little bit of that, like give her a minute. And that's just, that's so beautiful. Teresa: It was so nice. And you know, the same thing happened to Forrest. He had a precipitous birth. so he, the same thing happened to him. And Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: they like, but in the hospital, even though was a birth center. He got to be on me for a while Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Teresa: and then they were like, he just hasn't really had that big belty cry yet. we, he was like Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: Lotus, like awake and looking around, but hadn't Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: like, was stuck a bit floppy. And Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: so... They did the same thing. They took him off to the side and gave him Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: oxygen over there. And then they're like, do you mind if we take him just to like check on him in the special nursery? And I was like, okay. So Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Teresa: yeah, it's interesting how it works. It was just different at the home birth. It was like done on me Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Teresa: and then she stayed on me and she was... a normal temperature and just yeah and then they stay for hours that's what i don't think people Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Teresa: know is that like your midwife stays for hours and make sure that you're okay they Merelise Wilson: rate. Teresa: wrap you up into bed together and it's just like heaven heaven heaven Merelise Wilson: What did you have to eat for that first meal after a lotus? Teresa: Mark went and got me my favorite sushi from the sushi place in Baring Bay, which is like a yam tempura tofu roll. And that's what I had. And miso eggplant and bubble tea. had bubble tea as well. Yeah. It so good. It so good. Merelise Wilson: Yum. Yum. That first meal afterwards is almost as good as almost as good as pushing. Teresa: I know. my God. really, this has made me really feel like I want to have another one. I'm like, I'm gonna have just one more, one more. Or two more. I know I've Merelise Wilson: Oh, yes, just one more or two more and one, you know. Teresa: got, I've got my embryos. So I'm like, I, they just are sitting there. I know. Well, I could just put two embryos in. That could be the plan. Two little boys because they're boy embryos. So twin boys. Merelise Wilson: I still think you're going to have twins. I know. Yeah. Yes. There you go. There you go. Teresa: I know it's so shaky. I know, woo! amazing. Merelise Wilson: We'll have a part two next year. Oh, this has been so beautiful. Thank you so much. I, before you go, I always like to end my episodes kind of by asking my guests to describe birth and three words, which I know is a lot of pressure, but just whatever comes to mind first thing. Teresa: ecstatic, wild, profound. Merelise Wilson: that's beautiful. Ecstatic, wild, profound. Love it. I love it. Well, thank you. Thank you for sharing those stories. Teresa: Aww. Yes. Aww. Well thank you. Thank you. That was really fun. I really enjoyed it. It was awesome. I appreciate it, Marylis. And thanks for doing this for women. Merelise Wilson: I'm so glad it's the best. thank you, Teresa. I'm happy to. It's my honor. All right. Well, you've been Teresa: Aw, yay! Merelise Wilson: listening to the Arrivals podcast until next time. I'll just stop Teresa: Bye! Merelise Wilson: recording real quick. Bye.