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Embracing Your True Self · Death Before Decay

• speaker-0: Welcome to another episode of the Death Before Decay podcast. I am Dr. Elliot Humeston. This is a podcast by a dentist, but it's not always about dentistry. But I am with another dentist today, Alex Sargent. She's a friend from dental school. We're both local Wisconsin people, and yeah, good to see you today. speaker-1: I'm so happy to be here. I've missed Wisconsin. Yeah, speaker-0: Have you missed Wisconsin? speaker-1: yeah. speaker-0: Well, we've missed I've missed Alex. So I talked about dental school a lot earlier in the this like season of the podcast. And I decided at episode eight that I was gonna kind of close the door on it. I felt like I had complained about it enough. and then You and I started talking about you being on the episode. So we're gonna open that door just a little bit just to talk about how we met. But I think I've pretty firmly established that it was a traumatic time. Yeah. Let's just close it right back speaker-1: We can slam a shut after that. speaker-0: up. you and I both went to school in Milwaukee, but we did not know each other. You were at Marquette, I was at New University, Wisconsin, Milwaukee. when did you graduate from Marquette? speaker-1: twenty sixteen. speaker-0: Okay, so this one I graduated, so you had a gap year like I did. Mm-hmm. Okay. Cool. well I had a gap year in that I went and did a master's degree. You probably took some time off. speaker-1: No, I actually so I applied to dental school normal track, I was on the normal timeline and I didn't get accepted anywhere the first round. So and I think at that time I was naive. I probably applied to schools that I shouldn't have applied to. Yeah, I did that. And yeah, and but I I worked at Marquette's Dental School. So I thought I was like gonna go there and I was like, We're just gonna stay here. No, I was in the sterilization apartment in the basement. And yeah, that was a that was a crazy experience. And Yeah, didn't get in the first round and then I applied again and I didn't really know what to do, but I was so focused on dentistry at that point still that I moved back home to my dad's house and I found a job at a private practice dental office and I worked front desk for like a year. Okay. Yeah. Right on. Yeah. Which I think helps me overall. For sh speaker-0: Sure. I think one of the dynamics that we miss out on, especially as a private practice owner, is like we have different relationships with different departments of our office. And I feel like for if you're not like a pretty hands-on owner, the front desk is an area that gets overlooked But if they're not like embracing your vibe, your brand, your messaging. Everything falls apart going forward. So the fact that you know stuff about that probably helps you you can keep your ears out. speaker-1: It did speaker-0: so you and I both started dental school twenty seventeen. do you remember how we met? Yeah. speaker-1: Anatomy lab. Is that the first time? speaker-0: We met over a cadaver. speaker-1: You were so for I cause I feel like I loved being in a group with you. You could was that your first time dissecting something? I don't think so. Okay. It I didn't look like it. You were so passionate about dissecting it and I feel like I I feel like we all got like equal opportunity to do things. Like I don't feel I was like, you know missed out. But I love you were just did such a good job and you were going in there like no hesitation. Like no advantage going in there. speaker-0: I benefited, I had done one a little bit in undergrad, but we had done a complete body in grad school. speaker-1: At Marquette we did a complete body. Yeah. So it's disappointing in dental school we only got to do head and speaker-0: Yeah. So we did I did a full body at the medical college of Wisconsin. It took like five months. So my god. Yeah, it was a long time. So I that's probably why I was because I had been doing it for so long. It was a full semester and into the second semester. Yeah. So it was the full M1 part. And then but the problem was is that how the grading scale was set up, that by the time we got to head and neck, most people had everything they need to pass with a fairly good grade. They just needed like a 50%. Percent on the head and neck portion to get an A or a B. So everyone checked out, and I'm like, this is what I'm gonna be doing, so I'm gonna do all of it. So I did a ton of head and neck dissections. I think I may have been taken advantage of a little bit though, because our TA was coming in hungover half the time and making me do like half of what he should have been doing. speaker-1: I agree. Yeah, yeah. speaker-0: And I love that guy, but that's like like I remember there was an awakening point where I was just like I'm being taken advantage of here. I've like, because I love to show off, but at the same time, he should have been doing it. He's the one being paid. So but it was fun. I like look back on that time and you, Raleigh was in that group, I believe. Ben, and Mohammed. Jacqueline was I forgot Jacqueline. speaker-1: Jacqueline. Jacqueline? speaker-0: But you, Mohammed, Ben, I haven't heard from Norale in a long time. but you were probably the f three or four of the people I was closest with at through dental school. Because of that just big moment where we open the door and you're like, all right, this is like we're getting right into it. speaker-1: Yeah. Yeah, that was the most I feel like in the beginning intimate group you were with all the time. what was our c ethics was the other class at the time. That was it. And then it was like maybe you were in group projects with people around alphabet wise. You got really close to the people you were alphabetized. speaker-0: I got I knew the the two Johnson boys very well. speaker-1: Well I was with 'cause I got ex I got accepted off the wait list a week before school started. So I took a spot of someone with the last name of Kay. And so I was right between Greg and Tisme. Okay. speaker-0: Yeah. Yeah, that's crazy. you think about those little things that happened at the beginning to you in any life situation that just follow everything through. okay, so one thing I think that like like reflecting on this we could think about is what I think I've talked about what would surprise that guy from back then about what I am now. What would surprise Alex? from back then about how where you are now. speaker-1: That's a question. I think the biggest change for me, like there was there was two points I feel like I kind of changed a lot. I feel like up until starting dental school, my goal and like my main thing in life was just to get into dental school. Yes. And then like I w that was what I was ups obsessed about. Like everything in life revolved about getting into dental school. And then you get into dental school and you're like, okay, I'm here and like I feel like at that point the goal is to survive. speaker-0: Yes. speaker-1: that same first day we would have met in anatomy lab, I signed up for an intro to Olympic weightlifting. speaker-0: I remember that. speaker-1: So well. And I had gotten a little bit of taste of it prior, like I had a strength I did triathlons in undergrad and I had a strength and conditioning coach that I think that's when more Olympic weightlifting got popular in the States. And so they would watch it or talk about it and you know, I would look it up online and I was like I at that point I was kind of over the whole endurance thing and I fell in love with weightlifting in general and the fact when you know, got to move to Indianapolis, a mile from my apartment, there was Olympic weightlifting specific Gym. Yeah. And so I was like, well, let's do this. Like it'll be a good thing to do outside of dental school to keep me like active and a break. And that became such a big part of my identity that I think like that first week of school, I realized like I love dentistry and I have no regrets about being a dentist, but there's so much more to life outside of the profession. And I think being into that and you know, like I was in that gym two hours a day, six days a week. And that gave me like speaker-0: Can't believe you had that much time, but speaker-1: I don't know how I did it. Yeah. I just think the part of it that it was like, you know, exercise is good for you. Yeah. And then also it gave me such a good sense of community. Like that became like my second family. That's Like outside of like, you know, we had I had really good friends in dental school, like great support system there. But there was something like being r able to remove yourself from the dentistry aspect. Like besides every once in a while, like those everyone asks teeth questions to someone as dental school or dentist. You get that all the time, like can you look at this? Like kind of thing. But that was able to give me like such a separate way to release my energy and try to a step to figure out who I am and like what I like that I did that for the first three day years of dental school up until like COVID hit and then that kind of changed everything. speaker-0: Yeah, I remember you doing that and joking with you over there over the cadaver about so what were you doing last night? Just picking things up and putting them down over and over and over. I think that became That was just like a joke speaker-1: That's essentially what it is. speaker-0: you and I had for for four years. that my terrible sense of humor never got tired of and you were too nice to s shut it down. but That's awesome because so many people didn't have lives out of dental school or they were just living the same lives that they lived before dental school because they were still living in the same place they lived in. Yeah. so it sounds like you really started finding yourself during that time. speaker-1: Yeah, I would say that was the big first moment of change that, that was the first time I lived outside of Wisconsin and had really been on my own. I had an apartment by myself. I was lucky for all of dental school to live alone, which I think was a big thing too. Up until that point I was like with my family or roommates. And then, you know, dental school besides like that helped me realize like, okay, it's gonna be important when I graduate to have a life outside of, you know, this career as well. And then Yeah, after got to graduation and like I feel like everything was like pretty stable at that point. I stayed speaker-0: So closing the door on dental school, you're with you were dating one of our good friends at the time. I guess I wanna hear about whether you felt that it was freeing or terrifying because I remember walking out of the I hated school so much, especially that like the the bureaucracy of everything and it only got worse during COVID. But I remember walking out of that building for the last time thinking I'd be elated and I felt nothing. It was so weird. I just walked to my car and I'm like I never have to park here again. Yeah. That's great. I did you have an emotional response to it? Cause I'm always like concerned that I did. speaker-1: I did I think it's you just dissociate at some point. Yeah. I think it's relief, and I I really think it sucked we graduated that time in COVID because I think it would have felt more yeah, no party, no physical graduation. I feel like that took away maybe what would have been the joy and relief from like graduating getting close. Like I don't even remember like the last patient I saw in clinic or the last moment I walked out of school. Like I'd I unfortunately or unfortunately don't have that memory. speaker-0: The only thing I remember is talking to Dr. Bennett and giving him a big hug. and talking to Dr. Taylor and doing the same thing, walking to my car and that was it. Like I think I even went back and took a few photos on graduation day with a couple of our classmates. That was it. Like I remember our graduation felt like another on a Zoom class. Like Yeah. speaker-1: Th that's a really good description of it. speaker-0: So we're closing this door. Let's like For me, I guess it did feel freeing because all of a sudden I had this free time to actually think about life. Where did you go after that? speaker-1: within days of like graduating, we had like a little ceremony in Indianapolis and my significant other at the time we decided to move to Fort Wayne. So we packed up our stuff, we moved up there and that so I decided decided to stay in Indiana. speaker-0: Which ruined our plan that we had had all through dental school of creating Sergeant Hummiston dentistry. Remember we had a little mascot idea? Do remember speaker-1: I love Sheboygan though. Yeah. So I could I'm gonna come stalk you speaker-0: Okay. speaker-1: here. speaker-0: Okay, so you moved to Fort Wayne, which is it's a nice city. I actually almost took a job there. Yeah. speaker-1: Where did you do your public health rotation? Sorry to bring up to speaker-0: but just I did my public health rotation just outside of Fountain Square in Indianapolis. It was six blocks from my house. That's close. Yeah. speaker-1: wow. Really close. speaker-0: I had a we had the dog at the time and the cats, and my wife worked full-time. So I just was like, hey, someone needs to watch the animals. I can't like go away completely. Yeah. speaker-1: Yeah. So mine was in Fort Wayne, so that was my first experience going up there. Yeah. speaker-0: Yeah. Yeah. And you got into were you working private practice? What were you doing? speaker-1: Yep. my first job out of dental school was for a DSO. It was for a very small DSO and the office was de novo practice. Just had started within the past year. And the doctor had I was supposed to be a different practice, like I ended up being there and it was one assistant, one hygienist, one front desk, and it was not busy at all. And after a few months there I was like, you know, like I'm at a point in my career where I need to be doing like more volume of treatment to actually get good at this. And I need to be seeing people, talking people, working on people. And I had the opportunity to move over to a busier, if it was a private group practice with multiple locations. So I had the opportunity to switch over to that. So within I don't know, six to nine months after graduate like after my f starting that first job, I had switched over to that private group. Yeah. And I had stayed there up until moving out of Indiana. I liked it there at that. speaker-0: Yeah, I don't think a lot of people realize how like common it is for healthcare professionals to jump from job to job just looking for the right fit and right opportunity. I think speaker-1: there's unfortunately a stigma around it too. I think you want to commit to a job and I've had friends some of our classmates that probably stayed at jobs way longer than they should have for so many different reasons where I have never been scared to leave for like my own mental health, like what's for multiple reasons. speaker-0: And if were out there for six to nine months, I think that's an appropriate time. I I always say give it a year, so you're you're pretty close. But at that at the same point, that first year is just so impactful for the rest of your career. I I would agree that you had to make the right choice and moving forward. speaker-1: Yeah. And the private group that ended up working for in Indiana for a while, they were awesome. when I initially signed my contract and we figured I was going over there, before I even started working there, they had already paid for my Ivy sedation course. they were investing in me day one and they were so supportive in that way. and just the environment of like the assistants at that office were all very like strong assistants, which makes a big difference when you're a new graduate starting out. speaker-0: One hundred percent. Yeah. a new grad or an active dental student is at like listening to this, that's the biggest thing is finding a place that's had assistance there for a while. even if you don't want them guiding your hands, which some of could do and some of probably could but shouldn't, like they know your instrumentation better than you do. Like I think speaker-1: Yeah. They hand you things, you're like, speaker-0: that's a good idea. I had a classmate or another dental a dentist say, Yeah, I didn't even think about like carrying a wedge over with a cotton fliers until an assistant did it. And I was like, That's so obvious. But at the same time we miss on little things. That's like those little things that we don't get in dental school because we don't work with a qualified assistant. You had to plan this out intentionally then. it was designed versus figuring shit out because like I'm in a place where I can't figure any shit out because I'm not seeing enough people. So now I need to design that future going forward. speaker-1: Yeah. And it wasn't necessarily a bad transition. I think may if anything, it was a blessing. Cause I started out Great. speaker-0: Starting slow sounds really speaker-1: Yeah. I I'm like, well, let's do Molando, let's do these surgical extractions 'cause I have time to figure it out. Yeah. And then making that jump so it went from one of each position to six hygienists, four columns with two doctors, very big change. Yeah. And so I feel like that's when I really grew my time management skills and efficiency. I feel like that office in Indiana is a big reason I feel like I'm the doctor I am today. speaker-0: That's awesome. And the fact that they paid for Ivy sedation training is insane. speaker-1: That is very the and I did the docs education one and that one's price. speaker-0: It is pricey. So I'm docs educated on moderate oral sedation. and I have found that you can get a lot done with oral. speaker-1: If anything, I feel like the CEI took made me more scared to sedate people. So I feel like I'm paranoid about just I think that made me look at people's medical histories more in general, just about everything. I'm checking your medical history for so many on so many levels before I prescribe you anything. speaker-0: Yeah, I am definitely more conscious of it. I rely on my drug books a lot more because I was always terrible about memorizing. and I are like rely on softwares a lot for helping me with that. But like every time as I'm getting ready to grind up my pills to give the patients, like I'm looking at their medication list. And if there's a medication that I look at and I don't know, I stop grinding, I go run my contraindication check and then I come back and do it. You have to look at so many different things. And I think I became comfortable with sedation because I saw my dad do it so often. So was just like, if something happens, the hospital's next door. But that was like yeah, what that was when I entered training. And then I got my training. I'm like All right. Well, even if it is only a five minute response time, it's still on me to keep that patient for the speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: stable for the five minutes. But the quality of education is one hundred percent like super valuable. and that's probably where you started figuring out the value of C E, I bet, 'cause that's a big part of your life now. speaker-1: Mm-hmm. Yeah. before the first major CE course I took was I took the implant pathway, the the non clinical portion right before graduation. I flew out to Philadelphia. It's the place that like you can go to Arizona and you know, extract teeth and they would have like regional things in like Chicago or Philadelphia. Now I think they're set up Yeah. speaker-0: Is that the name of the group, implant pathways? Okay. speaker-1: so I did that one right before graduation and then the big I did the IV sedation like nine months after graduating. And then yeah, after that I feel like I got into C E, you know, I've done a lot of more like implant things since then. speaker-0: So is that when you started to figure out what kind of dentist do you want to be? Or do you are you are you the dentist that you wanna be? speaker-1: That's a good question. I I am the dentist I want to be. I think, you know, go into dental school and they ask you in the interview, like, why dentistry? And I feel like, you know, I probably had a really polished answer. I think that answer has changed over time. I genuinely realized at this point I just love helping people. And I feel like as an associate that's been associate since graduating, I feel like there's so much pressure to become this super GP and the super GP model. And I think me committing to IV sedation that early on in my I've just embraced it. That's kinda set the chart. speaker-0: Yeah. Super G P is a is a general dentist who can do pretty much everything. And I had the same thing. I wanted to be a super GP. And some people might look at the way I practice and say that I am and I would one hundred percent disagree with them. I speaker-1: It it's crazy 'cause j looking at you from the outside, I think you are and I think I am, but I don't think I am. Right. Yeah. speaker-0: Like there are so many things that I don't want to do and I pass off and I don't have any regrets about doing it. And there are things that I'm more passionate about than others. Like s like so many people are into sleep medicine and things like that. Yes. And I find it so boring. It puts me to sleep. Because it is boring. Yeah, it is very boring. So I'd rather like be airway like aware than an airway treater, I always say. speaker-1: That's how I felt like I've worked with a lot of dentists that have really embraced it and like I've learned a lot. What I know about airway is because I've learned from them. That's awesome. And I've to the point yeah, where like I feel confident screening it and referring it to the right place, but I want nothing to do with making your appliance that level d speaker-0: Yeah. For me, it's like get a diagnosis from somebody. I will, send it to the lab, get you a mandibular advancement device, and then they can your GP can test you again. that's where I stop. Yeah. and it's the the most basic device that I can find. so but was like when you started doing the IV sedation, was like, holy cow, this opens up so many avenues for me to become the dentist I want to be? speaker-1: I think so, yeah. A big reason I wanted to do it was just for people with anxiety. I think I thought that was my intention more than, people wanting wisdom teeth out and stuff like that. I think there was so many patients I was seeing at that time that wanted for like anxiety and just relaxation. And I was like, I want everyone to be comfortable and I don't want to be, you know, the limiting factor if they're not. and that got to the point where at that point I knew I had wanted to place implants. I didn't get the opportunity to place them until my current job in Florida. I just had Dennis, above me and older that, take those cases from me. Yeah. don't commit to training that level. And now I'm in a situation where I get to do that and yeah, I I love it now. speaker-0: It's interesting 'cause I my last associate wanted to be trained on implants and then when I started training them on implants, they didn't want to do implants anymore. And then even sending them to CE, like 'cause to me you can go and learn the like what you did, you can go and learn the background information. That's almost more inf impactful than like placing the implant, like speaker-1: Placing it is like in for people that take implant C, so much of it is not even placing it. placing it is such a small portion of what they actually teach you. speaker-0: almost say it's the easiest part because you can do everything planned now happen. So you went through a pretty big life event though, that that kinda or just a big life change in general that maybe Alex at twenty one or twenty three wouldn't have predicted, I'm guessing. speaker-1: No, definitely not. I so after staying in Indiana for a few years, I got out of a long term relationship and it gave me a lot of time to be with myself and kind of figure like who is Alex? What does Alex want? And during that process, you know, I was in Fort Wayne, I decided to move to Florida, I came out as gay, I yeah, I Yeah. I am dating a woman now and I feel like that was such a big like that period of my life really kind of set the tone for like this next stage of my life that I don't think the Alex that I knew five years ago not that she wouldn't recognize her. I think she would be proud of her. Like I think a lot of who I am was always there. I've just embraced the qualities of me that I like better. speaker-0: I like that a lot. you know, I think on the first day that I knew you, we were talking about relationships and I was like girlfriend or boyfriend, and you like scowled at me and was like, boyfriend. And I was like, Okay, all right. but like I think like did the you had all this time to become more independent because before you got to dental school, like you said you were do You're living in the same area that you had lived in. You were close to your parents. you had that support system. You had the family support system. And then you move somewhere completely different. You're in probably a more liberal environment. You're probably around people that think differently than the people you grew up around. you have like dental school is full of a lot of diverse personalities, like that's for sure. Or something for you. speaker-1: Yeah, and I think speaker-0: Like is that when you started like feeling more independent? speaker-1: That was part of it. I feel like half my friends in dental school I feel like were more religious and conservative, which is like what I grew up in. And I think that's initially maybe why I gravitated towards that. And I love them and that's fine. There's nothing wrong with that. Yeah, nothing wrong with that. And then I that was the opportunity where I feel like I really met more like liberal leaning friends and I was like and I feel like my family was so conservative growing up and I think a lot of those mindsets were just pushed on me that it didn't even allow me to like think I was able to have opinions other than that. So I feel like my opinions were so locked in and being I think moving to Indiana and then since then it's let me like really become more open minded and realize there's so much more to the world and other aspects of things speaker-0: think I I don't think that's special for anyone, to be honest with you. I think a lot of us grow up or in the environment that we grow up in. And I think it's one of the huge benefits of a traditional li liberal education Trying different things. I wouldn't be the person I am today if I didn't take some of those classes. yeah, I'm not using any of it in my day-to-day life, but I am using what I learned. speaker-1: Yeah. And Marquette part of the curriculum was like to take theology and philosophy and stuff like that, which I think really makes you think about those things like you weren't you're not taught in public school. Right. Yeah. speaker-0: So when did you come to terms with your sexuality like in this timeline? I'm trying to do the speaker-1: Sure. it was about the time a couple years out of school I had gotten out of that long term relationship and around the same time of like moving down to Florida. So about like right now, probably like three years ago. speaker-0: Okay. And coming out was hard. speaker-1: Yeah, especially like I said, I grew up in a very conservative household. So I feel like some family members didn't handle the news as well as others. And then same thing with friends. there's a lot of friends that I've told and they're very supportive about it and it didn't change anything about our relationship. And then other ones, since I've told them maybe haven't talked to me at all or as much And I feel like the millennial generation as a whole probably has so much suppressed closeted people individuals. I feel like it's like a joke in the gay community, I'm a baby gay because I haven't been gay that long. speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: So and I haven't heard that before. speaker-0: So you're like you're going through this huge transition point. You're you're like look at the world is changing, your politics are changing, the way that you identify is changing. and then you move to Florida, which is an incredibly conservative but beautiful place to live. Yeah. tell me about Florida. speaker-1: Yeah, life sorta brought me there for personal reasons and I I love the weather and the beaches. I'm very happy to be in Wisconsin right now because it's been humid as heck this summer. But I love living there. I don't necessarily see myself there like long term. So it's a nice place to like I'm just embracing like the weather and the climate right now, you know, being I how we kinda talked about I'm a little over an hour away from Disney World, so I'm going there as much as I can. Yeah. So like things like that I'm taking advantage of of living there. And there's a lot of good people in Florida. for sure. Like yeah, there's a lot of ones like you see on the news and stuff like that. But there's so many like nice speaker-0: calling them Florida man. Have you ever heard that term? Yeah. speaker-1: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's on the news all the time. Yeah. They have a really good I love the Hispanic community just throughout the whole state. Like half of my office I work out now, like I work with someone that's Puerto Rican, Cuban, Colombian, Mexican, and I feel like that culture is more prominent there than it was like in Indiana and Florida. And I unfortunately speaker-0: Indiana specialist. speaker-1: I haven't learned Spanish or anything like that yet. But I feel like that has made me feel like more comfortable there compared to Florida man. speaker-0: just talking to you, you you and I haven't talked in super closely in a few years, you're still the same Alex. You just seem much more confident, and feel like do you feel like a like a better version of yourself at this point? speaker-1: Would y that's a very accurate way to describe how I feel. Yeah, I feel like I'm a more competent version of myself. if anything I'm felt like maybe the person we talked about, Alex at twenty one was very suppressed, her voice and maybe what she likes and doesn't speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: Yeah. I grew up I was a really shy kid growing up. And I feel like in dentistry you can't be shy. No, no. And I think at some point I was like, Well dang, I'm gonna have to talk a lot. huh. And I feel like it's made me to be like more extroverted and outgoing. Like deep down I think I'm still a introvert. Yeah. Yeah. speaker-0: So that social battery probably dies and you just go into your office and sit for speaker-1: Yeah, yeah. speaker-0: So then you started like you've told me about some of your projects and let's get into them like so you're going through all of this and then you wrote a book. So tell me about this book. speaker-1: Yeah. About a year ago I really got a itch to open up my own office, but I'm not in a location where I can wanna commit to that long term. so I have done like let's call these professional side quests. the first one I did was, yeah, I wrote a book book. I've gotten really into meditation and like affirmations and manifestation I would say the past few years and at a certain point I was at dinner with some friends and we were talking about one person had known a classmate of theirs that was like, they wrote this affirmation book for chiropractic. And I was like, well I could do that. sure. Yeah, let me do that. Cool. And I feel like like you kind of referenced like I have ADHD hobbies. So I'm like, well let me just write a book. Yeah. And like Yeah, let's just start about so yeah, sixty days later, it's called within normal limits and it's three hundred and sixty-five daily affirmations. And my intention behind it was in dental school and like the first few years practicing, you ha get can get such bad imposter syndrome. And dentistry teaches us like how to do dentistry, but not anything mental. the mental aspect that comes with being a dentist and practicing as a dentist. And so my intention is for like to target like, you know, dental school students and new graduates to kinda take through the phase of like, no, remind yourself, like you can do this. Like you can have bad days. speaker-0: For people who aren't in a professional field like ours or had to go through intense training. So let's dive into imposter syndrome. Yeah. Do you want to describe it for peop for people? speaker-1: Sure. imposter syndrome, I don't know like the true definition. speaker-0: Don't worry, we'll just get at it. speaker-1: it's when you feel inadequately trained to like do what you're supposed to do. And it could be like no matter how much training you have, you feel like you're not meant to be there. Like you're not meant to be doing this job, like you're not worthy of it, you're not smart to be there, like you feel like inadequate. speaker-0: One hundred percent. And the best way I describe it is holy cow, I'm doing the thing that the people that I looked up to very much doing. They're doctors. Am I like I have the diploma. Am I supposed to be doing this? Can I do this? And it goes through your brain so often right out of school. I don't think enough people like surrender themselves to it and realize like this is part of growing, Rely on your training, keep moving forward, it's gonna be okay. but I think it's a huge like source of burnout for a lot of people. So this like manifestation book sounds like speaker-1: Yeah, and that's what inspired me to do it. And the reason I got into affirmations and meditation and stuff like that, because I was getting burnout. I've worked at where I work at now where I've worked at the past, high volume dentistry, and it's easy to not take care of yourself. Like you can't help someone else unless your own cup is full. speaker-0: Like that. I was at one of our classmates' weddings and everyone's like, What have you been doing? you're placing all these implants, how are you doing this so early? and I'm like I'm just grinding crazy and the situation that I was in where my dad got sick. I had to take over everything right away. It sucked. And they're like, how are you handling it? I'm like, I got a therapist. the day I moved back to Sheboygan, I hired a therapist and started talking to someone and started breaking down the trauma and the imposter syndrome. And if you're getting out of dental school, I've talked to a therapist at least twice. you don't know how much you have to unpack until you talk to talk to someone. Maybe you don't need one. But a lot of people do and you should at least exercise that ability. speaker-1: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's not for everyone necessarily maybe, but I think it's for a lot of people. therapy. So I the first time I saw a therapist was when I was eighteen. And then I feel like I got to a point, I saw one all throughout undergrad, and I got to a point where now I feel like I am stable in a lot of things where I only see one as needed. So I'm like, Okay, got out of that long term relationship. I went into therapy 'cause I knew I'm like I am gonna need to talk to someone about this to make sure and the biggest thing for me is preventing trauma or it ruining my life long term by speaker-0: Yeah. I don't I always told my therapist at the beginning, I'm like, I don't know if I need you to psychoanalyze me or not, because I've been psychoanalyzed for most of my life and I've kinda got it figured out. I know what's wrong. I just need to yell at someone that speaker-1: Just to talk to somebody. And I feel like it's different, partners and spouses, you can talk to them a lot too, but it it's also like unloading. you do want to unload your emotional trauma in that way to them all the time. speaker-0: And they start tying because they care about you, they start trying to fix it or they start trying to justify it. it it can get really complicated and really, really messy. speaker-1: Yeah. Big fan of therapy. speaker-0: Me too. So I like your side quest thing. Because I professional side quest is like a thing. speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: Yeah, when I was an associate, I started a med spa pract thing inside my dad's dental practice. And then when I became an owner, I got burned out with ownership at times. and so I started looking for other creative outlets. Now podcast. I'm actually writing a story right now for absolutely no reason. I don't know if it'll ever see the light of day, but it's just it's important to have those outlets to get those things out. And as an owner, I don't have a lot of time outside of work. I've got a baby coming. So I look for things that I can do on the fly and being able to use my phone to just write ideas down. you started your most recent one, which is this CE rating system thing. Like what triggered that? speaker-1: I feel like since graduation I've talked to so many friends and colleagues. there's so many places online you can go read reviews about everything. And it's like, okay, we're spending thousands of dollars on CE courses, but you can't unless you know someone that took it or just happened to come across someone like's review on it in a Reddit forum or something. There's not like a singular spot to go to to look at these reviews. And I was like, it's not just dentistry, it's like all healthcare professions. And so I created rate my CE. I launched it like late spring and right now it's just in the stage of building a lot of reviews and just dentistry right now. but I'm looking to add chiropractic next year and the idea was I feel like when I went to college, rate my professor was so helpful. Did you use that? Yeah. speaker-0: All the T speaker-1: Yeah, it was so helpful picking classes and make sure you're choosing the right one. So I'm like speaker-0: Always it was always disappointing when the only teacher teaching it was the had a terrible speaker-1: Re exactly. Yeah. So my goal is to make a resource like that for continuing education courses for across healthcare. speaker-0: Yeah, that's really interesting. when you first put it out there, I was like, I've done so much CE, where would I start? And I I have to get on your site and start working it working them out. But Yeah. There's there's speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: so many little courses out there that I think get overlooked because everyone wants to go panky. Everyone wants to go spear. Everyone wants to go t toce, Dawson. And I threw myself in with Spear and I love their curriculum. I haven't regretted taking any of their courses. But I've taken some smaller ones that were really, really good too. But they also had a There I've taken some smaller ones that had a lot that I got out of them, but they also had a lot of bullshit in them too. So I think there's speaker-1: Yeah. speaker-0: that like that like, hey, if I had known about that going in, I probably would have been a little less frustrated. So that's that's really cool. One so it I also see that you've been like putting things out there for like CE requirements for different states and things like that too. speaker-1: Yeah, I am in my own marketing team. Like everything about the website is yeah, just me right now. And you know, starting it out, I was like, Well, what do I even post on social media? And I was like, Well, I feel like a really important part is like knowing the CE requirements for a state. So I'm like, Okay, let me make these carousel posts. So like ideally someone saves them and I'm working on integrating it to the website now. So it's just a resource online because I feel like in in making it it's Reading websites, some states, it's like, okay, you have to go through the whole laws, the the law book to figure out what your requirements are for renewal. And so many things are written in gray. Exactly. So I f and it's like so vague on some websites. So I'm like, well, let me start building a resource to like add that to the website. I feel like my place in dentistry, I just wanna help people. So I'm like, okay, with the book, with the website, with like practicing. I'm like the website's just another step in that direction that the goal is for it to always be free. Like I'm never gonna charge people for using the website like that as just a resource for clinicians. I feel like there's so many things that are gate kept and like methods and stuff, like, you wanna learn how to do this, you got to pay three thousand dollars to do it. So I feel like just making it easier for clinicians to make better choices about things and just starting with C E, I'm hoping that's a step in the right direction that I think maybe that'll make it I don't know, bring a sense of community to each medical profession on the website. speaker-0: I like that a lot because I think some of the gatekeeping is finally getting torn down a little bit with the implement implementation of social media. Like I still get like thing I've see things on like Instagram of like a way to design a flap to increase keratinized tissue. And I'm like speaker-1: There's so many good free resources out there. speaker-0: Crazy. Yeah. But I would never devalue some of the courses that I went and did hands-on at the same time. There's been I've taken some online stuff that hasn't been very good. but there's also so much value in going to a place that's really well established. But then you can also go to s like some of these smaller groups and get some of that information for us a lot cheaper and probably walk away with a mentor at the same time too. speaker-1: That's one thing I do like about C is typically with the more expensive ones too, or even smaller ones, they do a good job of being like, Here's my email address, message me or call me or text me if have any questions. Yeah, and they com commit to it. speaker-0: yeah, I I am like a CE junkie. I've got I think close to five hundred hours already. Like that's awesome. Yeah. It like when I saw your resource came come up, I was like, that sounds really interesting. I wonder if she'd come on the podcast for it. And then you messaged me like I think three weeks later. Yeah. speaker-1: Yeah. Well I'm happy to be here. speaker-0: you've always been a strong person physically. And emotionally. what is something like you would like to talk about coming on this podcast that we haven't really brought up yet? speaker-1: I would say going back to making sure it's so important to have identity outside of dentistry. Yeah. And I think that's what's helped me become like the person who I am today. And a stronger person. Yeah, a stronger person, physically, mentally, that just embracing your hobbies at any level, whether it's like, you know, a professional side quest or even like personal ones, like I recently got really into Legos. Like why not? Yeah, why not? They're so fun to do. Just things like that. Yeah. Like little things that. Just finding anything that make do what makes you happy that's so important on any level sometimes it's professional thing sometimes yeah I love Legos and Star Wars like I've I watch on eBay like you know retired sets like I'm stalking them yeah spot speaker-0: What's your favorite set right now? speaker-1: R2D2 retired R2D no speaker-0: Did you have you built it yet? speaker-1: it's at home my plan is to bedazzle it's yeah yeah I bought a huge kit and I was like you know what this sounds really fun speaker-0: Yeah. I so my wife and I went through a tragedy a couple of years ago and we were it like it was like an awful position. Like we were so upset. so we s we were like we need to do something, we need to get our brains off of things 'cause we would just stare at it the TV, but then like the other part of your brain isn't active. So we started doing Legos. Yeah. So we would just we'd set the manual between us, she did the right page, I did the left page. We built a ton of Harry Potter sets. And now they just sat there for a while, on display. I call them our depression Legos. and then our bo we we found out we were pregnant with a daughter and we did the room Harry Potter themed and a lot of the Lego sets were Harry Potter. And it came back. Like we really enjoyed doing those sets. We did back then too, but it was like something we moved on from it was therapeutic. And speaker-1: It's so therapeutic. If no one's ever made a Lego, just go buy a small Lego and make speaker-0: Buy a model of a car, just something putting something together is so nice. like during COVID, I was 3D printing and painting figurines like nonstop. Like just doing something with your hands while you're listening to an audiobook or watching TV. And you can do it with other people. You don't have to do it by yourself, but it's also nice to do it by yourselves. speaker-1: Yeah, yeah. speaker-0: cool. What's do you have a set that you're like do you have a grail set that you want to get a hold of? speaker-1: I think I wanna buy the big Star Wars ones eventually. Right now, the reason I'm holding yeah, I'm holding back because I'm like, where the heck do I put that? Yeah. Is the biggest thing. Exactly. That too. Yeah. So I'm like, okay, once I get my forever home or build my own office, my office is definitely gonna have Legos in it. I speaker-0: that'd be so called. speaker-1: feel like my doctor's off yeah, I'm gonna have a Lego office or something. Yeah. That'd be speaker-0: Super cool. so you you you've gained strength through a lot of different things. You've gained strength through Olympic weightlifting, you've given gained strength through therapy and the mental discipline, emotional dis discipline you've built up. what are you doing right now to keep yourself strong, physically and emotionally? speaker-1: I think it's just finding balance in a lot of things and I think the more time you spend with yourself, you learn like when you reach your limit in certain regards. So like say I came home and I'd a to do list of certain things. Like, you know, there's certain things that are essential. Maybe I have to I I definitely have to take the cat litter out today, you know, stuff like that. Other things like I'm like, okay, this is gonna wait because my mental health and physical health are more important. Like I'm just gonna go for a walk right now or I'm gonna go walk on the beach or lay outside or something like that. Yeah. not competitively anymore. I just do it, as needed. I'll write my own weightlifting programs. I have everything in my garage. Okay. Yeah. So I'm sure my neighbors love that. speaker-0: I love that. so what what's the goal? What's what what's happening next for you? What's where's your energy being pointed at right now? speaker-1: Right now my energy is mainly just focusing on being an associate, you know, just like becoming a better dentist every day. not too many big changes in in like that professional world. professionally I also am like trying to focus on the website a lot. I would say like I'm trying to make sure that's like my main professional side quest right now. But speaker-0: Did you have to teach yourself how to do that? speaker-1: Yeah, I watched a lot of videos on coding. I I feel like in college maybe I took a class on how to build a website and I had to watch a lot it took weeks to to get it to where it was and yeah. That speaker-0: Yeah, I'm trying to build a website on my own right now for like for this and for my speaking stuff. and I like it's hard. Even on square templates, it's it's hard speaker-1: I've used a lot of templates but then I think the biggest thing for the website that I built was creating the form to like speaker-0: Submit. Yes. whoa, you did what? So speaker-1: That's cool. And then just growing from now, I'm at some point I'm definitely gonna have to hire a professional to take it to the next level. But right now where I'm at, I'm just looking to get as many reviews as possible and just get feedback from other care healthcare professionals on how to make it better. speaker-0: What's the website called exactly? speaker-1: rate myce.com. Okay. Yeah. besides that, I'm I am working on a coloring version book of the of the book I wrote. speaker-0: You're draw making a colouring book? speaker-1: Yeah, yeah. I'm still finalizing the ideas of it, but I think that would be more therapeutic in some ways than the way it is, it's built out to just be like these two daily affirmations on every page. and I'm like, well, if I made in a coloring book version of that, then you can like focus on it a little bit more rather than just, you know, repeating these sent like this blank page of words to yourself. speaker-0: That's awesome. Yeah. Yeah. I like that you're focusing your your energy on the things outside of not just professionally, but the things outside of of your profession as well. Cause especially if you become an owner, it gets so difficult. That first like year is just a fire hose. and you're gonna make more money than you ever thought you would. And then the second year comes around and you realize, okay, now the bills are coming up because you did this update or that update or you didn't spend any money at all, which is probably wise and not something I did. and then you're making less money and then like it comes back around and like, okay, I it takes five years to establish what type of practice you're gonna own. And it's so exhausting. So how like creating that work life balance early on and setting setting that standard and protecting that time is super important. speaker-1: Yeah. I take a lot of time too, as working these different associate jobs, I'll maybe write down like I have a blueprint of the office I want and I'm constantly adding changing to it, So I think I have a pretty good idea of what I want out of my own practice when I get to that point, which is also a benefit of being in the position I am too. That's awesome. speaker-0: Yeah. Are you planning, so w are you planning like in the next five years you're gonna own a practice as the Okay. speaker-1: That's the goal, yeah. speaker-0: And then the final question before we wrap things up, I ask everyone who's the dentist, what are you gonna tell to somebody who's just entering dental school? speaker-1: study in dental school. my biggest thing would be to take care of your energy and autonomy and build your life. Like don't let dentistry become your identity. Yeah. That makes sure you protect that aspect of you going into it and a lot easier said than that. speaker-0: Yeah, it's super hard. I always say dental school is designed to beat the individuality out of you. and w I look at so many people from the generations before us, their identity is trapped in dentistry, so retiring becomes impossible. I think that's a really like that's a good way to put it. Like your identity is super important. What about after dental school? What would you tell a new grad right now? speaker-1: If you're in an environment where you can listen to whether it's a hygienist or older doctor or assistants, listen to the words they say and how they talk to patients. I feel like starting out, we you talk to patients in dental school, but there's such key phrases that make presenting treatment and selling treatment and describing things so much easier. I know to talk to people. That I feel like that's one of the big things I learned early on is just how to be like efficient and talk to a patient properly and it makes your life so much easier. Love it. speaker-0: Cool. Cool. right on. So thank you for coming on. If I was really excited because I haven't seen you in forever and we were so close for so long. So tell everybody where they can find you. speaker-1: Yeah, I'm on Instagram. my personal one is drill sergeant dds. I have a cool last name, so that helped with yeah. rate myce is at rate myce on Instagram and the website is also rate myce.com. speaker-0: Cool. Right on. All right. This has been a great episode of Death Before Decay. I really appreciate you going coming on here. Thank you. and thanks for everyone who's been listening. you can find me on Instagram at drum. Elliot Hummiston. And yeah, good luck on your journey.