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It's National Folding Your Laundry Day! · Armstrong & Getty One More Thing

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  Speaker 1: Oh look, it's National folding your laundry Day. Let's celebrate.
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  Speaker 1: It's one more thing. I'm strong, Andy, one more thing.
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  Speaker 1: Washington Posts had a good article the other day that
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  Speaker 1: something we have mocked for years, and I've never heard
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  Speaker 1: anybody else talk about this but us. Actually you, you
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  Speaker 1: brought it to us many years ago. You started it.
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  Speaker 1: This is one of your many g odds. Joe has
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  Speaker 1: so many g ods, and one of them is fighting
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  Speaker 1: back against national so called national holidays that are all
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  Speaker 1: made up. And then Joe brought us the information many
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  Speaker 1: many years ago that there are these various websites that
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  Speaker 1: charge you, like for five hundred bucks, will declare this
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  Speaker 1: national you know, uh, Local Realtor's Day, and you, as
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  Speaker 1: a local realtor, think that'd be really cool, so you
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  Speaker 1: bay the money, and then it shows up on a
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  Speaker 1: calendar somewhere. A local news station mention it doesn't accident,
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  Speaker 1: He's National Strawberry Shortcake Day, say the newscaster or idiots,
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  Speaker 1: And the Washington Post headline was, we ranked fifty seven
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  Speaker 1: hundred holidays from Labor Day to World Dracula Day. Which
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  Speaker 1: ones do you celebrate? And you can put in a
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  Speaker 1: date like your birthday or whatever, and get the list
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  Speaker 1: of all of them. Like today it's September third when
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  Speaker 1: we're recording, this is Global Talent Acquisition Day, Merchant Navy Day,
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  Speaker 1: Skyscraper Day. I mean, that's just some of them, you know,
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  Speaker 1: And what the hell you those mean?
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  Speaker 2: What does it mean?
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  Speaker 3: Right?
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  Speaker 1: It's a lot like the We'll have a star named
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  Speaker 1: for you in the National Register. It's similar to that
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  Speaker 1: sort of thing. National Folding Laundry Day I mentioned is
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  Speaker 1: March thirtieth. Uh National Jerky Day is June twelfth. There
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  Speaker 1: is a what if cats and dogs had a posable
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  Speaker 1: thumbs Day, which is March third.
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  Speaker 2: Chills me to the ball and even contemplated.
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  Speaker 1: It's all pretty stupid, and we could go room and
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  Speaker 1: mock those and laugh about them and all that sort
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  Speaker 1: of stuff. And then they have a realness score on
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  Speaker 1: these days, and they ranked all fifty seven hundred on
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  Speaker 1: the realness score, which includes a whole bunch of stuff.
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  Speaker 1: Do I actually have what the criteria is? I kind
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  Speaker 1: of have it off the top of my head. It's
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  Speaker 1: the how many people celebrate it, how many calendars included
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  Speaker 1: on there, how often does it get mentioned in the media,
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  Speaker 1: you know, blah blah blah as to how real it
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  Speaker 1: is or not. And for the list, yeah, for the
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  Speaker 1: ones today, for instance, US Bowling League Day is today
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  Speaker 1: that has a point five realness score, like half of
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  Speaker 1: one percent in terms of how real a holiday that is,
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  Speaker 1: and a lot of them are really really low. But
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  Speaker 1: then they ranked everything, which I thought was kind of interesting,
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  Speaker 1: and I also saw some typical Washington Post sort of
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  Speaker 1: bias in there. Oh, by the way, the national hug days,
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  Speaker 1: there are hundreds of those, like National Hug of Plumber Day,
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  Speaker 1: National Hugga Drummer Day, National hug someone named Kevin Day,
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  Speaker 1: National hugg A Musician Day, hu hug An Australian Hug
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  Speaker 1: of vegetarian hug a, Medievalist hug of sheep. I mean,
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  Speaker 1: there's just there's many, many, many of these. No, I
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  Speaker 1: was just hugging the sheep, I promise, get through hoofs
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  Speaker 1: out of my boots. How did that happen?
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  Speaker 2: We all thinking of that.
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  Speaker 1: He just caught me at a weird angle. So there's that.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, this is really an interesting article. They go
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  Speaker 1: through so many parts of it, the nailing down what's
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  Speaker 1: the realist and then they got this graph with the dots.
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  Speaker 1: I mean, it's really, really quite something for fifty seven
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  Speaker 1: hundred different holidays, and how real they are. The most
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  Speaker 1: real holiday with a score of eleven point eight, very
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  Speaker 1: good score, very high. Twenty out of fifteen. I don't
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  Speaker 1: know what it is, but the highest score, which is
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  Speaker 1: not surprising if you thought about it for very long. Thanksgiving,
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  Speaker 1: that's the most real, Okay, most the biggest chunk of
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  Speaker 1: people celebrate it because it's non religious, gets mentioned, companies
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  Speaker 1: honor it, businesses are closed, shows up on calendars, all
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  Speaker 1: of the things. The highest ranking you can get is
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  Speaker 1: for Thanksgiving. I must quibble and say it was quite
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  Speaker 1: specifically deliberately religious at first. Oh yeah, it's not now.
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  Speaker 3: And that's the idea that many people have of the day.
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  Speaker 3: But certainly gluttony and football are reason enough to gather
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  Speaker 3: and celebrate the day.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, and nobody attaches it to a religious and religion now,
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  Speaker 1: so nobody gets butt hurt about it, and everybody goes
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  Speaker 1: ahead and does.
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  Speaker 3: It if you want to. It's entirely voluntary and well,
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  Speaker 3: God bless you.
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  Speaker 1: Followed by Memorial Day, followed by and again this is
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  Speaker 1: a Washington Post coming up with the criteria well, let
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  Speaker 1: me just throw in off the top of my head.
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  Speaker 1: How many do they have your twenty of the top
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  Speaker 1: twenty Christmas isn't in there? I call bullshit. Yes, oh please.
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  Speaker 1: The entire country stops for Christmas. And I don't care
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  Speaker 1: if you're Jewish or Muslim, it still stops. I mean,
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  Speaker 1: it's just everything is built around vacations, commerce, whatever. It is,
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  Speaker 1: like twenty percent of our economy. I mean, everything is
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  Speaker 1: built around that. To not have that on here because
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  Speaker 1: you want to be so precious about not having a
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  Speaker 1: religious holiday is so Washington Post.
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  Speaker 2: You know.
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  Speaker 3: I just had a revelation because you're one hundred percent right.
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  Speaker 3: I agree with you, and I initially was when you said,
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  Speaker 3: that's just so pissed off an annoyed at the Washington Post.
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  Speaker 2: But it's funny.
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  Speaker 3: It's just flashed into my head. The Washington Post, like
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  Speaker 3: so much a progressive America beclowns itself so skillfully and thoroughly.
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  Speaker 3: I shouldn't be annoyed with them. I should be grateful.
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  Speaker 3: It's like, if you know, I had a rival for
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  Speaker 3: the hand of a fair young lass and that rival
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  Speaker 3: like punched her mom in the stomach.
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  Speaker 2: I mean, that's what the Washington Post is doing.
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  Speaker 3: In the war for hearts and minds.
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  Speaker 2: You people are effing stupid.
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  Speaker 3: You don't well, Christmas is really just you know, Christians,
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  Speaker 3: white people, something, the patriarchy, blah blah blah.
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  Speaker 2: Oh my god.
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  Speaker 1: Every business in America structures their year around Christmas. For instance, Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: I know.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, God dang it.
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  Speaker 1: So and then people suck.
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  Speaker 3: You suck at your jobs, You suck morally, you have
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  Speaker 3: no wisdom, You certainly don't have a sense of humor.
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  Speaker 3: You suck.
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  Speaker 1: Right. It's like I'm always mentioning. I mentioned this every
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  Speaker 1: Mother's Day, which is like number five fifteen on the
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  Speaker 1: list of the most real holidays. I would say that
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  Speaker 1: should be higher. Also every year where.
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  Speaker 3: Do they have Independence Day aka the fourth of July.
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  Speaker 1: I'll get to some more of them will make you mad.
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  Speaker 1: But like every Mother's Day, I always, I always mention
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  Speaker 1: the op eds because Mother's Day Sunday in the Washington
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  Speaker 1: Post will have endless op eds about how awful Mother's
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  Speaker 1: Day is, or how awful moms are, or how awful
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  Speaker 1: you know, using the term mom is, or whatever crap
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  Speaker 1: that appeals to practically no one. So number one realness
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  Speaker 1: Thanksgiving number two, realness, Memorial Day. I'm happy with that
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  Speaker 1: number three realness of all the things that exist, Juneteenth
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  Speaker 1: s t f U. I. But it's just it's just wrong.
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  Speaker 1: It's not I'm not making a racial judgment here, it's
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  Speaker 1: just wrong. You could add, I'll bet there's a third
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  Speaker 1: of the country that still doesn't even know Juneteenth.
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  Speaker 3: Exists, right, And there's a that knows that exists, but
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  Speaker 3: aren't sure what we're celebrating.
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  Speaker 1: And don't do anything as opposed to Christmas, which is
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  Speaker 1: an on this list.
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  Speaker 2: I stand by my aforementioned four letters.
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  Speaker 1: You couldn't if you locked yourself in the basement and
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  Speaker 1: stuff stuff in your ears avoid knowing it was Christmas. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: but they have Juneteenth ranked third in terms of real holidays. AnyWho,
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  Speaker 1: then Martin Luther King Junior Day, similar before Independence Day.
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  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, Well, this is a study of psychosis. This
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  Speaker 3: has nothing to do with holidays. This has to do
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  Speaker 3: with psychotic people who happen to work at the Washington Post.
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  Speaker 1: Well, this is this is one sub section of this
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  Speaker 1: whole thing about holidays, And the main thing is just
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  Speaker 1: that there are fifty seven hundred completely made up crap
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  Speaker 1: days that nobody even knows exists. That's the most point.
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  Speaker 1: But then this realness scale they came up with so
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  Speaker 1: that they could interject their Washington Post goodness of wokeness
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  Speaker 1: about everything. So, yeah, Independence Day looks like it's about
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  Speaker 1: seventeenth or something on the list, which is hilarious. That's
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  Speaker 1: another one that everybody's aware of. Freaking everybody knows Fourth
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  Speaker 1: of July happens and builds their summer around it. Well, right,
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  Speaker 1: and if you were unaware of it, the fireworks would
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  Speaker 1: remind you there are literally fucking fireworks on that day.
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  Speaker 1: And you go downtown that morning, how come I can't
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  Speaker 1: get across the street. The Fourth of July Parade's going
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  Speaker 1: on in every town in America, including my town.
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  Speaker 2: But and again I.
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  Speaker 3: Don't want to disrespect Junteen because it's a it's a
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  Speaker 3: cool thing.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, but so that was just hilarious. I thought, Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: International Hug of Deer Day, National Huggin Newsperson Day, hug
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  Speaker 1: a Shed and take a Selfie Day.
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  Speaker 2: What the hell is that?
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  Speaker 1: Hug a shed and take a selfie? I don't know
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  Speaker 1: what that is. Hug a bear, hug an addict or
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: Alcoholic Day, hug a greeting card writer day. That's kind
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  Speaker 1: of funny meta thing. International hug a runner, hug an economist,
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  Speaker 1: hug an economist.
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  Speaker 2: Wow, you find an accounting how you doing nice? Uh?
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  Speaker 1: Graph I was about fifteen percent better before you hugged me.
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  Speaker 1: Words that appear twenty five times or more in the
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  Speaker 1: names of unofficial holidays. I'll end with this, but the
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  Speaker 1: amount of information they have on this is really quite amazing.
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  Speaker 1: The most common word to show up in the fifty
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  Speaker 1: seven hundred different holidays dog, which is not that surprising.
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  Speaker 1: There's just so many different iterations of bring your dog
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  Speaker 1: to work, hug your dog, feed your dog.
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  Speaker 2: Love your dog, blah blah blah.
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  Speaker 1: Sure, then chocolate cream, love cream cream, coffee, round coffee.
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  Speaker 1: Why cream makes such an appairance cream ice cream? Then
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  Speaker 1: the word take, the word work. The word hug pie
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  Speaker 1: is down there though, but it's on the list m
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  Speaker 1: For instance, there's doggy Date Night Day where you take
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  Speaker 1: your dog on a date, you weirdo, National Dog Theft Day, Oh,
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  Speaker 1: National Dog Theft Awareness Day, Okay, French Bulldog Day, Little Pamper,
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  Speaker 1: Dog Day, Rescue Dog Day, Dog Party Day, Dogs and
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  Speaker 1: Politics Day, Dog Photography Day, Black Dog Day, Thankful for
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  Speaker 1: my dog Day, which is different than the other dog
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  Speaker 1: days in some freaking way. Anyway, goes on and on
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  Speaker 1: and on, as we explained, Uh, Valentine's Day for don't
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  Speaker 1: your significant jerk? Day around love has a has a
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  Speaker 1: high score of realness. I had not heard that one before.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: Pick a day February first, that's the day you should
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  Speaker 1: dump your significant jerk. I think I remember talking about
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  Speaker 1: this in the past. It's around the whole how they
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  Speaker 1: were at your family gatherings, did they not get you
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  Speaker 1: a present? Blah blah blah February first, at looking back
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  Speaker 1: on it, let's start, let's let's get rid of this.
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  Speaker 3: Person, right, and you spend January thinking is this getting better?
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  Speaker 3: Am I overreacting? By the end of the months, you think, no, no,
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  Speaker 3: I'm not.
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  Speaker 1: I'm going to make this new mean new year. Knew me.
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  Speaker 3: I should have known they were an a hole when
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  Speaker 3: they told me they worked at the Washington Post.
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  Speaker 2: But I just I don't know.
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  Speaker 1: Aconomous day, well, I guess that's it.