Latest / Hart & Hustle Podcast / How One Man Turned Infertility Into a Mission to Fatherless Boys
Transcript
- Efrain: Welcome back to another episode here on the Heart and Hustle Podcast. I got Mr. Steven in the building. How you doing, sir? Stephen Murray: I'm good, Everen. Thanks for having me, man. Efrain: Say man. You know, I wanted to know because it is Friday, right? Getting ready for the weekend. How do you turn off, sir, when it's time for you to clock out on a Friday? Can imagine it's still kinda going on in the weekend, just a little bit, but what how do you turn it off? What do you love to do? Stephen Murray: You know, we we have an after school program, so it's like conveniently picking up kids, my own kids, is kind of like that's when the clock ends. I've got to get out of here, 545, go pick them up, abandon my team. And like my goal in life is to always walk in my front door and take my shoes off. Like something's different when you take your shoes off. It's like I'm transitioning. So I'm I'm a Efrain: Yeah, that's funny. Stephen Murray: different person when I just got my socks on. Efrain: You know, I I I got a good even a better question, right? We're men and I don't know that maybe you were taking off your shoes at one point. It was it a wife thing that she said, Hey babe, take your shoes off at the front door or cause I know my wife says, Hey, ain't no shoes out in this house. Where did that come up? Stephen Murray: man. I I feel like the th the thing that happens is like when I start doing bedtime and I still got my shoes on, I'm like, what are we doing here? What are we doing here? We gotta let w we gotta Efrain: All right. Stephen Murray: let them some things breathe before we get to to the bed, you know. So but Efrain: Too comfortable, yeah, no for sure. No, I love it. How many kids do you have? Stephen Murray: I have a six and four year old and so they're obviously a huge Efrain: we're in the same boat, man. Stephen Murray: part of my story right now. but we're having fun. They go to the same school now and it's a lot of fun. Efrain: We're we're in the same boat. I got a soon to be three in November and my five year old be six in January. So you're at that fun stage, man, where they're probably sassy pants. You're talking about reading the book. I you know, yesterday we caught ourselves having a movie night in my daughter's room with everyone on the bed 'cause that's what she really wanted for the week of doing so good at school. Isn't those fun times? Stephen Murray: Man. Yeah, we're first grade, pre K, I'm here for it. Like my kids, I I figured that they would like kind of revolt on the whole wearing uniforms, but they've like leaned into it and they're loving it. So my daughter is like the most girly girl you've ever met. And my my wife is like a tomboy. And so she doesn't know what to do with the Barbies and the bedazzledness and all this stuff. But I'm here for it, man. So Efrain: I know what I know what you do. You put on the tutus, don't ya? Stephen Murray: Hey, where no comment. No comment. Where's this is if this is going on the internet, we can't talk about that. Efrain: man, my my daughter is too funny. I'll sit there, man, and and today actually what we're doing. I don't have it on my table, but because I do a lot of mic work, right? I actually have a mic and she's she's seen dad's videos of me being at conventions, like really just hosting. So she did that to me. She grabs her little Lego, she puts a big Lego on top and she says, Dad, and she started asking me questions like this. so then I got her the mic, forget about it. She's she's official now, she has the Noah Rose show. And and you just find yourself Stephen Murray: Come on. Efrain: my wife is just like probably similar. My wife is like, I don't know how to get down on the floor and play with Barbies. It's just not my thing. Right. But here Dad is with these Barbies making all types of voices and sounds. Is is that a little bit of YouTube, man? Stephen Murray: My our our version is more like my son wants to ride his bike and my daughter is not with it. So I strap a rope to a like bike with training wheels on and I just pull her behind us and like we're we're making it work. Like all the all Efrain: You know Stephen Murray: the people that are like on your left, like all all those people, they hate seeing me pull up Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: on the lake and like riding around. They're like, This is not for you, this is for us. We're trying to get our PR and Mike, hey man, these are my kids. So Efrain: You you might be onto something though with that whole, you know, drag so my daughter loves to go on the bike as well, and and my son that doesn't really know how to ride the bike yet, you know, I'm like, I find myself kind of leaning over and dragging that bike. You know how it feels. We're we're little older, the back hurts a little bit. I got a bike here, man. I just gotta put you know, fill up the tires and maybe I'll do the same thing this weekend. See how that works for me. Stephen Murray: Man. They they are amazing and I'm I'm doing everything I can, man, to put them in the center of my life and not push them to the side. And so I I know you're probably the same as like, how Efrain: Yeah. Yeah. Stephen Murray: do you do that? You figure it out as you go. So Efrain: I love it. And and and you say that because you are leading Forerunner mentoring program. For those that may not know what the organization is, Enlighten us man, what are you guys doing? 'Cause you're doing it at home and then you go and do it at work because we're mentors ideally, even to our own kids. Stephen Murray: Yeah. I I I'm kind of like holding myself to this. I believe that the greatest revelation God gives us is the heart of a father. And there are so many kids growing up without a father figure. Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: that it it really is a challenge for a lot of young boys to figure out how to become a man if you don't have somebody bestowing that and calling you that and calling you up into it. And so Forerunner is an organization that was birthed out of fatherlessness, where a guy named Zach Garza, men in his life, who poured into him said, You are gonna become what you never had. And this organization started serving fatherless boys in Lake Highlands, and I became a part of it in 2016. so really like when you think about who are the odds stacked up against. It's the fatherless boy who has no idea what it means to be a man. And so our our hope is to help that boy fulfill his potential. And we do that through mentoring, which in our mind, mentoring is just showing up. It's building people up, you know, telling people they're doing 99 things wrong and they're doing one thing right. Let's focus on that one thing and just breathe life on that. and then ultimately We're a Christian organization. So we believe Jesus is the perfect man. And so if we look at him and model model our lives after him, we will become responsible. We will become humble men. We'll become men of integrity. We'll express leadership in our relationships and we'll respect authority. And so Jesus does that. And I I'm trying to do that. I think every single man in our neighborhood. is still asking that question, what does it mean to be a man? And it's funny that it's just like turning that mystery into something that's like mastery. Where it's like, can we become Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: masters of manhood? That's what I'd like to see. So we we pour into those boys, but we also grow in our own manhood in the process. So Efrain: You know what's crazy that you say that? First of all, did you grow up with a dad? Or without dad? Stephen Murray: Bro, today is my dad's birthday. I called him this morning at 6 30 and he answered the phone. And I was like, How are you up right now? And just wanted to leave him a voicemail and homie picked up. We had a great relationship. We shot shotguns growing up. I didn't like I didn't grow up in the church, so I didn't learn the Jesus thing from my dad, but I learned how to fix things. Like, like one of the primary ways that he express that. If I ever asked a question, he would say, figure it out. And Efrain: Hmm. Yeah. Stephen Murray: there's some of that, some of that that hurt as like, I'm putting myself out there. And and that's even to today. It's like, dad, what do you think about this stock? What do you think about this EFT? And my dad's like, figure it out, bro. But that that is also it's it's good feedback. So it's like, okay, I gotta figure this out. And figuring things out is a part of manhood. I would question whether you can become a man on your own. and I think that's what leads a lot of guys to struggle. But I have a great relationship with my dad because he picks up when I call and he reaches out to me and asks me how I'm doing. and I I love that. And I want every single boy to have men in their lives that they can call and that are calling them. Efrain: Got us. You you come at this from a different per perspective of understanding what it looked like to have a father, right? And and and and that was your your standard. And I'm gonna imagine that you're trying to surpass that as we all do. We always want to be better than the our our past. And I think as parents, we always want our kids to be better than us, ideally. And the reason I was asking that, man, is because I find myself, you know, that whole figure it out, that was my life. Like I didn't I didn't have a father, right? Like Being adopted, having a mom that raised seven of us, like that was mom and dad. You know, however, I always had to figure it out, figure out what it looked like to be a man, figure out how to fix things in my house. I actually become the son that she always calls on to fix something. Why? Because in my mind, I just had to figure it out. Because I was adopted to while she had four of her own kids. I'm the adopted one that just felt it I was a little different, right? and now I'm asking, I'm in this space, I love that you mentioned this. Is And my wife brought it to my attention, what what God wants in a man, right? And I've I've always said that I've had faith, right? I believe that's where I how I got where I'm at today. But I don't know that I've been as I'm hearing recently, it's like E Frank, God's in the car with you, you're just not letting him drive. So I'm in this space of like, what does that even mean? Right? Like, here I am thinking I'm doing all these things right. So I love what you're mentioning, man. Even at 36 years old, I am still trying to figure it out. And when she asked me that question, I I did kind of look into what is God's idea for man, right? and then I actually just re love this that we're having this conversation, but I have it opened into this book. But this is a devotional one minute with God for men. So when I was telling my neighbor, Stephen Murray: Bro, you came over receipts. Efrain: Hey man, listen, it just happened recently in the last couple of weeks. You know, I didn't I I didn't even expect to have this combo, but I feel like I'm in this place of putting together this event, right? October second. just overwhelmed and stressed and I think a lot of is it's what my wife is saying is like God already showed you this years ago when you were doing nonprofit work and the people that showed up. Like what do you what are you really stressing for? And then it always makes me so maybe I'm not believing you know in God because here I am you know overwhelmed and stressing to beat myself up but God already led me to this point. You know what I mean? By just doing his work. So Stephen Murray: Hmm. Yeah. Efrain: that's why I ask you about it, man. But I I see where you come from and I understand how you're pouring into and why you're pouring into and love that these are the conversations that you're having with young men. And I can only imagine to have stories of that keep you here, right? Like what are those stories, man, that it's like, man, I know this is the work that I should be doing. Stephen Murray: Yeah, I mean, like I'm I had a we we just hired new staff for our school semester. We started two weeks ago. And some every once in a while, someone will come into my office and they'll be like, what's that on the board? And I have a vision like poster board. It's Efrain: Mm-hmm. Stephen Murray: just like the Bible's clear, like, like make the vision plain. Like, what's your life gonna be about? And I think we're all figuring out what our purpose is. I think everybody was created on purpose for a purpose, but the time in which you figure that out, you gotta live some life. You gotta see what your gifts are and what your disposition is. And I I feel like there was a divine theme on fatherlessness because when we got married, we really struggled to have kids. And the a gr a great desire in my heart was to be a father. And so how do you wrestle with that when you're in a community whose primary struggle of every social issue leads back to fatherlessness and you're here sitting struggling with infertility. And I I really feel like the Lord was just kind of like wanting to put those those two streams together for me. And so I I had been a storyteller, a creative media director at a church. I led a college ministry. but I just the experiences where I'd meet kids in a park who were throwing a football up in the air to themselves. And like just longing for some other guy to just throw a ball with that like represents a deeper need to feel known and connected and and all of that stuff. Those are the moments that have led me where I'm at. I I went with my wife on an exploratory trip to Iraqi Kurdistan. I mean anybody watching this, like they're probably old enough to know about the whole ISIS deal that went down and Kurdish Peshmerga soldiers gave their lives to combat terrorism that was on the rise. And there were a lot of families that were displaced and had lost their fathers in that war. And so I went to serve orphans and widows of those fallen soldiers. And just recognizing: okay, this isn't just a my neighborhood issue. This is worldwide. Death, divorce, Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: desertion, deportation, incarceration, warfare. It's all like leading to things being stolen, killed, destroyed, and the the family is at the center of that. And so you you think about, you know, what's gonna solve, you know, the Middle East issues. And I'm like, well, fatherlessness is a huge part of that issue. A lot of boys are growing up not having direction and purpose that they were designed to have. and I don't Efrain: Mm. Stephen Murray: hear that conversation much when you talk about the Middle East. But watching it and watching what happens to a family when dad's gone, and walking with those families over years. what what dynamics the mothers face, what dynamics the sisters face, what what dynamics for their future economically, emotionally, all of those things. I just hung out with one of these students who he has a mustache now. Last time I saw him, he did not have a mustache. but homie lost his dad and is trying to figure out what it means to be a man. He looks just like his dad. Like I've seen pictures of him, but like he's got the mustache, but I don't know Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: if he knows who he is. Like what how much does that mess with you if you're named after your dad and you've you've never really had a relationship with him? It's like, do you really know who you are? Efrain: You want to know something crazy? So did you know I don't know if you know this, but you know I did the show and cover boss? Stephen Murray: You mentioned that when we first talked. I I Efrain: So Stephen Murray: meant to look it up on YouTube. I don't know if it's on there. Efrain: It's all good. You don't gotta look at it. I had a little baby mustache. so it's just funny you say this though. So I had a baby mustache, and that's really what kind of made me think about it. But also the the look like nah nah nah yeah yeah. I I Stephen Murray: But you weren't undercover with the mustache. It was just y you just have it. Efrain: was the employee, man, nineteen, twenty year old E foreign. that would go on show on TV. I am named after my father, by the way, but don't have a relationship with my father. And then I had a cousin reach out to me and says, Hey, I knew it was you. Because you smiled just like your dad. And he says, and when I seen the name, I was like, it got to be him. Mind you, I never knew that, right? Like, clearly he has a a sort of relationship with my father that I don't have. But that you say that, bro, it's like, holy crap, bro. Like, what a coincidence you share that story, right? And are you talking about me here, Steven? Like, what's going on here? Like, what the hell what do you know that I don't know? Mike, it Stephen Murray: That's crazy, man. Efrain: seems like you've been You've been doing this for some time. How many years you got in it? Stephen Murray: Well, so I I'll just say that in in struggling with infertility, I've been married fifteen years. And so around twenty fourteen, we were applying for foster care and adoption. We ended up housing a homeless kid. and it was a it's a very interesting experience. Like one thing it's one thing to do it through a you know, a process and organization. It's another to just like meet a kid and invite him onto your couch and just kind of try to pour your life into him and help him figure out what's next. so I mean I would say since twenty fourteen we've been doing things similar to that and have had different you know you can never like control outcomes. you want to put your hand on it and it's like I'm sure every farmer in the world wants to like confirm everything he did was right but Homie still's got to go to sleep and wake up and see what happens the next day and like go back to Efrain: Yeah, yeah. Stephen Murray: work. And so I mean, with that guy, he ended up stealing my identity at one point. he rented a U-Haul truck under my name. He wrecked it and there was a warrant out for my arrest. And then two pimps and a prostitute came to my home demanding money for services rendered. And so I'm a pastor. And like, what do you do in that situation? Efrain: my god. Stephen Murray: And so when when the stuff hits the fan and you're believing and investing your life in kids who haven't had direction, it can go a lot of different directions. And my my goal in life is really to not grow calloused when it comes to to those things, when it comes to the results. Like I my vision is like I want the broken. To find healing. I want the broke to find their feet. I want the lonely to find family. And so my desire for the future doesn't I I'm I'm less affected by the current stat. Like I'm I'm going forward. I w I want Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: to see that. And so rather than grow callous, I'm just growing calluses and I'm becoming more confirmed and affirmed in my identity as like this is what I want to live my life doing. Efrain: Wow. Stephen Murray: so Efrain: And you mentioned your kids, are are they adopted kids or you guys were actually able to have kids? Stephen Murray: So April 21st, 2019, I I wrote a vision statement and I I just shared some of it with you. Another portion of it is that I I said, We will have children and they will carry heaven everywhere they go. And so I wrote that April 21st, 2019. And cause somebody pressed me. They said, you know, are you praying to have kids? Like you keep mentioning you're struggling with infertility. Are you praying for that? And I Yeah, man, like Like we have our small group, get together, like we pray, like everybody lays hands on us, like we're believing for it. And he's like, That's great. You didn't really answer my question. You said other people are praying for it. Are you praying for it? I was like, come on, man. Like, are you are we really gonna go there? And so he encouraged me to incorporate that. Like, I'm speaking it. I'm not just asking others to speak it. I'm speaking it. And a year to the date. April twenty first, twenty twenty, Ben was born. So I got a six year old on my hands right now. And then a year and a half later, Marin was born. And and so the fact that I said we will have children Like it means something to me. Like, and I look at them and I like the three things I want them to know. I tell them every night, I'm glad I'm your dad. Jesus loves you like crazy. Carry heaven everywhere you go. And if those are the only three things they learn from me, I'm good, man. I'm good. Efrain: Yeah. Yeah. Wow, bro. What a story. What a freaking story, man. And good kind of goes to show what it looks like to have faith, what it looks like to believe in God. It's funny that you say what you said about just kind of almost my wife is kind of in this space of saying we gotta say our prayers out loud, right? and one of the things that I realize about myself is I do pray before I go to bed every night, probably a general prayer. Right. God may you, you know, protect our friends, our family, our X, Y, Z. And as I told you about this event, I was my neighbor was telling me the story of I forgot what story he was telling me, but he was telling me story and it just kind of clicked in my head. I'm like, maybe I'm not praying the way I should be praying. Like, here's this thing that is bothering me, right? That is causing me, you know, stress and causing me to feel the pressure. Like I need to add that into my prayer because if not, I'm just letting it sit there. Right. And and what you kind of mentioned is that sometimes and and there were probably people praying for me, but it's like, when do you do it for yourself? Right. Going back to you got God in the car, but you're not letting him drive. I can't believe someone told me that, by the way. I just every time I see him, I'm like, I can't believe you told me that. but I love it. It just it you are another testimony, man. And people don't believe it's like, look at the stories. The stories are there. When I think about representation, man, we think about the color of our skins, but it's truly the stories that we tell. And what a what a cool story. People that may not may be struggling somewhere, add that tonight to your own prayer and don't just allow someone to pray for you. Stephen Murray: Yeah, I mean, we I mean, we believe words matter. I mean, blessing matters. You watch kids do affirmations in school and Efrain: Amen. Stephen Murray: I'm like, man, if they're speaking it, they can they can be it. And like I Efrain: I'll believe it. Stephen Murray: want them to see it. Seeing like seeing a man that you want to be like, you want to emulate, like that helps you, but Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: also speaking that I think does something where you become a participant in your future story. And so like in in Forerunner, for instance, we have the boys recite our manhood declaration. So it's like just imagine a kindergartner screaming at the top of his lungs, I am a man of God. Like, and like homie may not even know God. Like, Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: let's be real. Like he may not know God, but he is saying, I'm a man of God. And like he's going to remember this season where he showed up In elementary and every day in program, he said that. And Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: like there's other phrases like I'm strong, fearless, and courageous. I walk in wisdom and power. I'm a man after God's own heart. I act with responsibility, humility, integrity, leadership, and respect. I will be a godly husband, father, and leader. Like, and they're just shouting it. And like they don't even know what a husband is, what a father is. But Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: but speaking it, it'll I like this this may be the wrong way to phrase it, but it's like, This vision for your life will haunt you the rest of your life if you're speaking it. It will follow you all the days of your life. Like in either either in blessing and affirmation and encouragement or calling you up and saying, Man, I'm made for more than what I'm living right now. Like, I'm I need I need to correct something about my life and live into that vision. And like who's Efrain: I also think I I I almost think that it's you guys are planting seeds, right? And is it up to men and mentors to water those seeds, right? Like to fertilize the future. And what does that look like? because you are going to go back into it and you'll remember, like to me, it was always those things that someone said to me along the way that allowed me to feel seen or heard or made me feel different about myself. And one thing that I remember someone saying to me was If my son grows up to be anything like you, I'll be a happy father. Right? Like that in itself was like, holy crap. I called that same man back and I says, if my kids grow up, you know, just to kind of say that those same words back to him. But I can imagine before that there was people in my life that planted seeds, and I found mentors through my life that were watering them. or sometimes planting seeds. So what you guys are doing, man, is is is fascinating. It is truly life experiences. you have to figure it out as your dad said. I mean, those are words of wisdom. While some may look at it like, what do you mean and get upset about it? Listen to what he's asking you. It's like I can't give you, I can't just give you the answer because you will never appreciate it as much. But if you figure it out, you hold on to that. You know, so yeah, kudos to your father on how many kids are you guys serving on a yearly basis, man? This is pretty cool. Stephen Murray: So this this past school year we served 230 boys. so those boys are coming up to an after school club. They're sh they're pulling up to our headquarters. they're coming for a night to talk about faith, manhood, leadership if they're in high school and their moms are gathering once to twice a month to like honestly, just like our our main message to mom is like Forerunner just wants to honor and celebrate you. For the role you're playing in your son's life. You're carrying a lot. And you are a you're an unsung hero of our neighborhood. And we gotta we gotta put a spotlight on you and say, Good job, mom. You're you're doing far better than you know. And so those nights are usually like we get a masseuse to come and just like let mom de stress, like Efrain: yeah. Love it. Stephen Murray: making flower arrangements, just just having fun. And like I I imagine single motherhood is very isolating. I've never been a single mother. So can't say I know that experience, but I've I'm I'm watching it and I'm like, homie, anytime Efrain: Yeah, yeah. Stephen Murray: my wife is not around, I'm like, does anybody see me? Do y'all know how much I'm I'm doing right now? And that's like 247 for these moms. And it's like, man, you are holding up the weight of the world. And we just we just wanna come put a arm next to you and lift you up. so Efrain: That is so cool. And do you have these boys come back to be mentors, I'm guessing? The cycle continues. Stephen Murray: Yeah, we we just started hiring our upperclassmen to serve in our elementary programs. Efrain: Wow. Stephen Murray: and so watching these guys who grew up in the program invest in the elementary that they went to and the guys that they were like, I mean, I think is a pretty compelling full circle deal that we're getting to now. I mean, we just sent off our some guys that started in third grade and they're going to college right now. And so everybody's path is different. But like watching these guys fulfill the roadmap that they laid out, that they wrote down what who they want to be, what they want to do. And it wasn't just go to the league or become a streamer. It's like, I want to be known as a kind man. Like I want to be known as patient. Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: Like I wanna, I want to be known as an overcomer. Like th those kind of things, like, okay, let's let's work on the character. That you want to develop and be known for through simple actions. And the and those guys, like, I I am so pleased with the men that they're becoming. And I was just texting with one of them. He went to Mary Harden Baylor this past week. And homie's like, he's got a job, he's going to class. He's he's got people in his network in Belton who are like inviting him to church. And I'm like, dude, you're doing it. You're doing it. And when he was three years old, he was removed from his parents' house and has never been in relationship with his mom and dad and has grown up under his grandma's house. And he faced a lot of issues with grandma because grandma had high expectations for a boy that really had a lot stolen from him. And so when Efrain: Mm-hmm. Stephen Murray: the odds are stacked against you, fortunately, this boy joined in third grade and he's always had father figures in his life. Like since then. And so he has men to call Efrain: That was amazing. Stephen Murray: and men to lean on and homies asking me for bed sheets. And I'm like, bro, like we got you. Bedsheets is like nothing. Like, but like I'm not Efrain: I love it. Stephen Murray: even thinking about college and bed sheets. Like that's that's just like Efrain: Yeah. Yeah. How how d how do people get involved? You know, I see that you guys got an event October second, so that's definitely to raise funds, but c like I'm guessing you guys are raising funds all year to continuing to add more boys. How else do people get involved? Stephen Murray: Yeah, our our our main goal is to put as many positive caring adults in the life of these kids. So if if they have kids on the football team and they're noticing a boy who who is struggling or needs a father figure, that they would step in and not even not even as a representative of Forerunner, but just as a representative of those that care about those who are s like central to God's heart. So are are like Founding verse is God is a father to the fatherless. and he's a defender of widows. He sets the lonely in family. he gives prisoners a song of praise. And so that that whole verse we connect with, and we're like, if that's what God's like, that's what we don't want to be like. We were made in his image. we have 125 active mentoring relationships that are one-on-one, where guys are showing up. twice a month to pour into one kid. And then we have our staff that are facilitating programs that are just helping the boys navigate the current life challenges they're facing. and all all of those guys are asking them, what's good in your life? What's garbage in your life? how are your grades? Like where's good where like where are you at on girls? And like maybe the one girl in your life is your mom, but like let's let's talk about it. Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: and just getting getting them into this mindset of like the questions that you ask inform what's important. And so a lot of these boys have a lot of questions, but really like you have to ask them questions in order for them to form the answers, rather than them just having questions with no answers, if that makes sense. So Efrain: Yeah. No, it does. Yeah, it does. I love it, man. I I know that you guys got an event October third and fourth. Or is there like a golf tournament or something that you guys are putting on or something? Stephen Murray: Yeah. Our October third is our women's retreat. So all the moms are getting lit. I mean, they're probably going to a hibachi place and karaoking and all that stuff. If you want in, Efrain, I'll see if I can get you an invite. the there's a backyard bash that's happening that Sunday and then a golf tournament later that week on the sixth. And so anybody Efrain: Got it, got it, got it. Stephen Murray: in Dallas that loves golf, hey man, bring it on. really we're we're a neighborhood organization. So getting the neighborhood together is kind of our we want everyone in the community to know about God's heart for the fatherless and the widow. And so our our understanding of that is the single mom is the modern day widow. and if if if that means we gotta throw events to get in front of people, like we're gonna do it. And we're gonna have Efrain: Yeah. Stephen Murray: a we're gonna have a blast doing it. So Efrain: Well listen, man, I appreciate the conversation. I know you got plenty of things to do, mentoring, getting ready for some events, getting ready to pick up the kids at some point today. where do people go to just know more about this organization? Website, are you guys on social so they can also see some videos or anything like that? Where do they go? Stephen Murray: Yeah, you can find us everywhere under Forerunner Mentoring. And so Forerunner, F-O-R-E-Runner. forerunner means that somebody somebody goes first. And so for these boys, nobody went first for them. And so they're gonna be the one that goes first for future their future family. They're gonna be the godly husband, father, and leader that they needed. Efrain: What a cool organization, man. Well, we thank you so much, Steven, for being who you are, for fertilizing the future, as we continue to say throughout this podcast yet through this conversation. If you guys want to go ahead and figure out how you also could be a mentor, especially if you live in that Texas area, make sure that you guys check out Forerunner Mentoring dot com. I'm Efrain. This is Steven. We'll catch you in the next one. Lates.