Latest / I Choose Me with Jennie Garth / I CHOOSE ME LIVE BACKSTAGE: Bozoma St. John, Ben Higgins & Amanda Kloots
Transcript
- 0:01Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Welcome
- 0:09Speaker 1: back to I Choose Me, the podcast where incredible people
- 0:13Speaker 1: inspire me every day. I had the absolute pleasure of
- 0:17Speaker 1: inviting some of those people onto the stage for my
- 0:20Speaker 1: second annual I Choose Me Empowerment Summit, presented by iHeart
- 0:25Speaker 1: and It Cosmetics, So over the next few weeks I'll
- 0:29Speaker 1: share conversations with each of them with you, my friend
- 0:33Speaker 1: Colleina Estrino sat down backstage with the powerhouse that is
- 0:37Speaker 1: Bozama Saint John, your Season twenty Bachelor, the deeply thoughtful
- 0:42Speaker 1: Ben Higgins, and the delightful Amanda Clutes, and a special
- 0:47Speaker 1: thanks to our presenting sponsors, iHeart and It Cosmetics.
- 0:51Speaker 2: I'm Kaleina Estrino's backstage at the second annual I Choose
- 0:55Speaker 2: Me Live Women's Empowerment Summit, and we have Bosama Saint
- 0:58Speaker 2: John here. Okay, I wish you people could see what
- 1:02Speaker 2: you look like because you look absolutely stunning.
- 1:04Speaker 3: Thank you. But by the way, the secret of this
- 1:06Speaker 3: is it's like wearing pajamas, you know what I'm saying.
- 1:09Speaker 3: And because it's a three piece outfit, uh huh, people
- 1:12Speaker 3: think you actually put on some work to look a
- 1:15Speaker 3: certain way because I put it together something. I didn't
- 1:17Speaker 3: put anything together. I just put all three pieces on. Okay,
- 1:19Speaker 3: So that's all.
- 1:20Speaker 2: I'm glad you said that because literally I thought the
- 1:22Speaker 2: same thing. I was like, oh, this matches with this,
- 1:24Speaker 2: and I just have to bring another top and put
- 1:26Speaker 2: on the top.
- 1:27Speaker 3: Absolutely, that's really the hack.
- 1:29Speaker 2: Okay, dressed you literally are everything When you walked in
- 1:32Speaker 2: the room, and I've seen a ton of interviews done
- 1:34Speaker 2: with you. You have it's like people are drawn to you.
- 1:38Speaker 2: You have this magnet, you have this power. You literally
- 1:42Speaker 2: own the room. And you know we're talking about empowerment today, right, Yes, yeah,
- 1:46Speaker 2: so let's talk specifically about how women may have helped
- 1:49Speaker 2: to shape you, how women may have helped make you
- 1:52Speaker 2: feel empowered, and how you now pass that on to
- 1:56Speaker 2: other women.
- 1:56Speaker 3: Yes, well, there's so many ways in which women have
- 1:59Speaker 3: empowered me. I mean, look, I think a lot of
- 2:01Speaker 3: people would probably point to their mother, and I short
- 2:03Speaker 3: do mine. She had a career as a model and
- 2:07Speaker 3: as a fashion designer before she married my dad, and
- 2:10Speaker 3: then when they got married and she had me, she
- 2:13Speaker 3: decided to be a stay at home mom, and so
- 2:16Speaker 3: she did that for thirty years until like my youngest
- 2:20Speaker 3: daughter was out of the or my youngest sister was
- 2:22Speaker 3: out of the house, and then she was like, Okay,
- 2:24Speaker 3: I think I'll go back to work now, you know.
- 2:26Speaker 3: And I just find it to be so inspiring because
- 2:31Speaker 3: I think for career women or someone like me, if
- 2:33Speaker 3: you look at my resume, you're like, Okay, I've been
- 2:35Speaker 3: in the C suite at four different companies. I'm in
- 2:38Speaker 3: the Hall of Fame. I've got you know, Forbes List,
- 2:40Speaker 3: like I've got all of the things. And you would
- 2:42Speaker 3: think that maybe I'd be like, ah, stay at home moms, eh,
- 2:46Speaker 3: you know, but the truth, they're the CEO of the house.
- 2:49Speaker 2: You know.
- 2:49Speaker 3: They work really really hard and they keep the house going,
- 2:52Speaker 3: They keep the kids fed, they keep the kids in school,
- 2:55Speaker 3: they keep the homework done, they have the pta meetings.
- 2:57Speaker 3: You know, they're managing so much. And I'm constantly inspired
- 3:03Speaker 3: by women who make the choice to own their life,
- 3:06Speaker 3: you know, in whatever capacity that is. And so for me,
- 3:09Speaker 3: it's like that's the empowerment. It's like, just choose the
- 3:11Speaker 3: life you want. You don't have to have my life,
- 3:13Speaker 3: you don't have to have anybody's life. As the map
- 3:18Speaker 3: to success. So I just own whatever you're doing and
- 3:20Speaker 3: make it the greatest ever. And then that's the same
- 3:23Speaker 3: way I feel about everybody coming up. So I don't
- 3:25Speaker 3: look at my career and say, oh, I want hers,
- 3:27Speaker 3: So I girl, do yours. Well.
- 3:28Speaker 2: I do feel like your career and your journey that
- 3:32Speaker 2: you've had being in so many spaces that are male
- 3:34Speaker 2: dominated and staying true to yourself along the way does
- 3:39Speaker 2: really help other women say, Okay, that might not be
- 3:43Speaker 2: the career I want to be in, But how do
- 3:46Speaker 2: I channel that? How do I make sure I stand
- 3:50Speaker 2: on my own two feet in a room full of
- 3:52Speaker 2: men who may not see my vision? How do I do?
- 3:55Speaker 2: What is your advice for people trying to navigate that?
- 3:57Speaker 4: Well?
- 3:58Speaker 3: Look, as a marketer, I think a lot of people
- 4:00Speaker 3: think I'm just creative and I love the arts, but
- 4:02Speaker 3: I also love science and math. And I've used this
- 4:06Speaker 3: example a lot, you know where it's like, Look, I
- 4:08Speaker 3: take it from physics, all right, and there's matter. So
- 4:12Speaker 3: matter is made up of molecules. And when you take
- 4:15Speaker 3: one molecule out the matter, the entire matter changes. Okay,
- 4:19Speaker 3: that's science. You put one molecule in it, the whole
- 4:22Speaker 3: thing changes. Again, so if we consider that we individuals
- 4:25Speaker 3: are the molecules that go into a matter, and the
- 4:27Speaker 3: matter can be a boardroom, it can be a community,
- 4:31Speaker 3: it can be a school, it can be a meeting,
- 4:33Speaker 3: it could be a coffee date. Whatever the matter is,
- 4:37Speaker 3: your individual molecule that enters the matter changes it significantly
- 4:43Speaker 3: for the better. And so I'm like, hey, look, when
- 4:45Speaker 3: you walk into a room or you are present in
- 4:48Speaker 3: a space, you are that molecule. And it really doesn't
- 4:51Speaker 3: matter if you've climbed everest or you're at the top
- 4:55Speaker 3: of somebody's like you know, thirty onder thirty list, or
- 4:58Speaker 3: you don't have to do any of those things. Just
- 5:00Speaker 3: simply existing is what changes the room. And so every
- 5:04Speaker 3: time you enter it you should feel that way.
- 5:06Speaker 2: You just made me love science even more. Yeah, this
- 5:08Speaker 2: is great, you know what I mean? So question for you.
- 5:12Speaker 2: You're a mom, so I know navigating the space of
- 5:17Speaker 2: being a parent and trying to make sure that you
- 5:20Speaker 2: lead and guide in the way you see fit is
- 5:24Speaker 2: really important. But I do feel like as adults, we
- 5:27Speaker 2: know we made a lot of mistakes growing up, and
- 5:29Speaker 2: a lot of those mistakes lead to I.
- 5:31Speaker 3: Know, we won't get alive.
- 5:36Speaker 1: Truth.
- 5:37Speaker 2: But a lot of those mistakes lead to where we
- 5:38Speaker 2: are today. So how do you navigate that when you're
- 5:42Speaker 2: you know, raising your daughter. Oh yeah, you know, because
- 5:45Speaker 2: you do want them to make mistakes, but you also
- 5:47Speaker 2: want to make sure that they make the right decisions.
- 5:49Speaker 2: If it's sometimes sad decisions lead to good decisions. So
- 5:52Speaker 2: can you walk us through that?
- 5:53Speaker 3: Look, that is the hardest thing. Literally, last week, my
- 5:56Speaker 3: daughter and I were talking about this. She's going to
- 5:58Speaker 3: be seventeen in a month, okay, and oh.
- 6:00Speaker 2: My gosh, she's an adult.
- 6:01Speaker 3: Yeah, oh my god, so terrifying. But I did, I
- 6:05Speaker 3: literally said to her, because we're talking about something and
- 6:08Speaker 3: she's a very rational person. You know. I am more
- 6:12Speaker 3: spontaneous and like I'd like to just kick from my knee,
- 6:15Speaker 3: you know what I mean. Whereas like, she thinks it
- 6:17Speaker 3: through and she's always been very thoughtful. So even when
- 6:20Speaker 3: we are talking through a disagreement, she is very measured.
- 6:25Speaker 3: And I have a hard time with that because she's
- 6:27Speaker 3: so smart. Yeah, she challenges me a lot, but it's
- 6:33Speaker 3: not a challenging and like boundaries, it's a challenge to
- 6:36Speaker 3: understand why I would enact of rule or why I
- 6:39Speaker 3: would say that Okay, you can't do that, or you
- 6:41Speaker 3: can do this. And she's very good at being peaceful
- 6:46Speaker 3: and thoughtful so that it's clear. And it rattles me
- 6:49Speaker 3: because I'm just like, girl, I don't know because I
- 6:52Speaker 3: said so, you know, but I don't want to say that.
- 6:54Speaker 3: And so last week we're having this conversation and we
- 6:57Speaker 3: were talking about her curfew, you know, and because she
- 7:00Speaker 3: drives and she's running around and she's got a very
- 7:03Speaker 3: active social life, and you know, the girl, I mean,
- 7:05Speaker 3: I don't think she's doing anything crazy, but you know,
- 7:07Speaker 3: she's outside and I'm like, well, she's out over here,
- 7:10Speaker 3: refreshing her location every five minutes to see where she's at.
- 7:14Speaker 3: So we're having a conversation about that, and I had,
- 7:17Speaker 3: you know, made some arbitrary decisions about time, and she
- 7:21Speaker 3: challenged me on it. You know, it was just like, well,
- 7:24Speaker 3: but if I can do this on a Saturday, why
- 7:27Speaker 3: can't I do that on Friday? Because it's still the
- 7:30Speaker 3: same thing, right, I can still do we like, but
- 7:33Speaker 3: it was like so wonderfully said and I just sat
- 7:36Speaker 3: there and I looked at her. I was just like, look,
- 7:38Speaker 3: the truth is I have never raised a sixteen year
- 7:41Speaker 3: old before in my life. Okay, I've never I've never
- 7:43Speaker 3: been here. I have no idea what to do. Okay,
- 7:47Speaker 3: I'm trying to help you make it to seventeen and
- 7:51Speaker 3: then make it to eighteen and then get out of
- 7:53Speaker 3: my house. I'm like, I'm trying to help you be
- 7:58Speaker 3: the best version of yours. I'm not trying to make
- 8:01Speaker 3: you me. I'm not trying to say like, look, when
- 8:04Speaker 3: I was your age, I did this and that and
- 8:05Speaker 3: blah blah blah. But I've never been here before, and
- 8:08Speaker 3: so you're gonna have to help me with this, Okay.
- 8:10Speaker 3: Like some of the rationale I made it up. I
- 8:13Speaker 3: don't know ill, but that's the truth of it. And
- 8:16Speaker 3: she really appreciated that. And I think our relationship has
- 8:18Speaker 3: always been that honest, and so it's easy for me.
- 8:22Speaker 3: I would say easy. It is easier for me to
- 8:27Speaker 3: be able to have the honest conversation and then sometimes
- 8:31Speaker 3: say nah, I don't know why I said that, but
- 8:33Speaker 3: it's a no. It's just a no.
- 8:35Speaker 2: What does it look like between you two, because it
- 8:37Speaker 2: sounds like you have a beautiful and fun relationship. Oh, yes,
- 8:40Speaker 2: when you both give each other grace?
- 8:42Speaker 3: Yes, what is that in respect. Yeah, I think the
- 8:45Speaker 3: respect part is very important, you know, but she has
- 8:48Speaker 3: always known that because I had to instill that sort
- 8:52Speaker 3: of two way respect early. Unfortunately, her father, my husband,
- 8:57Speaker 3: passed away when she was four. Sorry, he died of cancer.
- 9:00Speaker 3: And another truth I've always said and not been shy
- 9:04Speaker 3: away from, is that, you know, he's the one who
- 9:05Speaker 3: wanted a family, and so when he died, I was like, ah, hell,
- 9:09Speaker 3: what am I supposed to do now, you know, like
- 9:12Speaker 3: he's supposed to be here and help me, you know,
- 9:14Speaker 3: raise this person, and he wasn't. And so and look again,
- 9:20Speaker 3: I'm not going to be shy about the fact that
- 9:21Speaker 3: I'm ambitious. I'm a career woman. I wanted to get
- 9:24Speaker 3: to the top of the industry. And that doesn't happen
- 9:29Speaker 3: if you're not in the office and moving around and
- 9:31Speaker 3: like challenging, you know, and presenting and doing the five
- 9:34Speaker 3: minute meeting with the CEO and catching people in the
- 9:36Speaker 3: elevator and pitching an idea. You know, it doesn't happen
- 9:39Speaker 3: without that. And so she and I had to have
- 9:41Speaker 3: a conversation at four years old, you know, where I
- 9:44Speaker 3: was just like, hey, look, I still want to do this, Okay,
- 9:48Speaker 3: I still want to chase these dreams and I still
- 9:50Speaker 3: want to achieve, but it means that sometimes I won't
- 9:53Speaker 3: be here. And so I'm going to need you to
- 9:55Speaker 3: tell me when it is that something is happening and
- 9:58Speaker 3: you really want me there, Okay, And here's my calendar
- 10:02Speaker 3: and you can put your important things on it, and
- 10:05Speaker 3: I will be there at those important things. It won't
- 10:06Speaker 3: be every day, but I will do the things you
- 10:09Speaker 3: tell me to do. And I gave her that autonomy
- 10:11Speaker 3: and that respect at four and so now it's like, look,
- 10:15Speaker 3: I respect her enough to say that, like, hey, look,
- 10:18Speaker 3: your opinion matters to me, and I'm going to act
- 10:20Speaker 3: on it. And so she is very confident that if
- 10:24Speaker 3: she says something to me and she wants me to
- 10:26Speaker 3: do something, I'm gonna do it. Not because it's like,
- 10:29Speaker 3: oh maybe i'll do I feel obligated, but because she
- 10:33Speaker 3: said so, you know, and I expect her. I expect
- 10:36Speaker 3: the same respect from her. So that's why we can
- 10:38Speaker 3: have these conversations about boundaries and what you do at
- 10:42Speaker 3: sixteen and not I don't like that friend of yours.
- 10:46Speaker 3: You got to give those things. Yes, that she respects
- 10:48Speaker 3: my opinion, I respect hers.
- 10:50Speaker 2: So when she was four and you went through such
- 10:53Speaker 2: a tragic loss that must have shaped her and you,
- 10:58Speaker 2: of course in so much any different ways looking back
- 11:02Speaker 2: and now moving forward, When you guys deal with grief
- 11:05Speaker 2: or you talk about loss, or you talk about navigating
- 11:08Speaker 2: those emotions, what does that look like? Because you know,
- 11:12Speaker 2: I feel like widows have a hard time making that
- 11:16Speaker 2: transit my mom my dad passed away last year, yeah,
- 11:19Speaker 2: a year and a half from cancer as well, And
- 11:22Speaker 2: so seeing my mom make this adjustment into this you know, yeah, Well,
- 11:26Speaker 2: because you plan your life with this person, you raise
- 11:29Speaker 2: kids with this person, you picture this future with this person,
- 11:32Speaker 2: that person is no longer there. So for those widows
- 11:35Speaker 2: out there are someone who has lost someone and they're
- 11:37Speaker 2: trying to navigate. Okay, what does this next chapter look like?
- 11:41Speaker 2: What's your advice for them to stay true to themselves?
- 11:43Speaker 2: Also empowered but also no, it's okay to gree.
- 11:46Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I have so many thoughts on this. First,
- 11:50Speaker 3: tell your mom to call me, okay if she wants. Okay, perfect,
- 11:53Speaker 3: because I've been over here for thirteen years, okay, and
- 11:56Speaker 3: so I am. I am well versed in this widowhood.
- 12:00Speaker 3: I think there's a couple of things. One, I got
- 12:02Speaker 3: some really great advice when my husband died, and my
- 12:07Speaker 3: friend told me that I should not hide anything from Layelle,
- 12:12Speaker 3: you know, meaning that like I shouldn't hide my grief.
- 12:14Speaker 3: You know. I think some mothers their immediate reaction is
- 12:18Speaker 3: to protect the kids from their sadness, you know, don't
- 12:20Speaker 3: let don't let them see you cry, don't let them
- 12:22Speaker 3: see you upset, don't let them like just everything has
- 12:25Speaker 3: to be okay. And I was so glad I got
- 12:27Speaker 3: the advice not to do that, you know, because it
- 12:30Speaker 3: allowed for Layelle to grieve with me, you know, and
- 12:34Speaker 3: that when things happen, I'm not afraid to have her
- 12:39Speaker 3: see the truth of it. And she's so insightful, you know.
- 12:42Speaker 3: I think kids are so much smarter than we give
- 12:44Speaker 3: them credit for. And so there have been many, many
- 12:47Speaker 3: times when something has hit me the wrong way and
- 12:50Speaker 3: I go into, you know, my dark place, and Layelle's
- 12:54Speaker 3: the one who brings me out, you know, not because
- 12:56Speaker 3: she has some responsibility in it, but because she can
- 12:58Speaker 3: see it. She reckoned nice is it, you know? Or
- 13:01Speaker 3: it's just sometimes will be a touch on my shoulder.
- 13:05Speaker 3: Remember we did this interview a very long time ago
- 13:08Speaker 3: for own for Oprah's Network, and it was about Mother's
- 13:12Speaker 3: Day and we were talking about grief. And while I
- 13:17Speaker 3: was talking and I didn't even know she did it
- 13:19Speaker 3: until I saw the interview on TV later, she put
- 13:22Speaker 3: her hand on my shoulder and she rubbed it, you know,
- 13:26Speaker 3: and it was that little gesture. It's like when it
- 13:28Speaker 3: went out, you know, of course, people online and on
- 13:32Speaker 3: social media were like, oh my God, like your daughter,
- 13:35Speaker 3: you know, and I'm like, well, yeah, we've she's seen
- 13:38Speaker 3: me like this. You know. She knows that when I'm
- 13:40Speaker 3: going into that place that a slight touch or a
- 13:43Speaker 3: rub or something just to reassure me is what I need.
- 13:46Speaker 3: But that only happens if you are honest about your feelings.
- 13:50Speaker 3: If you're honest about where you are. It is not
- 13:52Speaker 3: scary to your kids to see your the depth of
- 13:56Speaker 3: your grief. They're probably feeling it too, and the two
- 13:59Speaker 3: of you can navigate it together. I think the other
- 14:01Speaker 3: thing that is important for widows or for people who
- 14:04Speaker 3: have gone through grief is that there is a before
- 14:08Speaker 3: and after. There is who you were before the thing happened.
- 14:12Speaker 3: And look, I can look at pictures of myself from
- 14:14Speaker 3: before my husband died and been like, ah, God, least
- 14:16Speaker 3: she didn't even know what was coming, you know. And
- 14:18Speaker 3: sometimes I'm jealous of her, and sometimes I'm excited for
- 14:23Speaker 3: her that she was still there in that very happy place.
- 14:27Speaker 3: And then there's the after, you know, and it's okay.
- 14:29Speaker 3: It's okay to be evolved, it's okay to have this
- 14:32Speaker 3: new identity. I think that sometimes it feels shameful. You know,
- 14:37Speaker 3: you don't want to say it. You don't want to
- 14:38Speaker 3: be like, oh, I'm not now I'm that person. You know,
- 14:41Speaker 3: people ask you, oh, I lost my mom, or I
- 14:43Speaker 3: lost my husband, or you know, my child, or I
- 14:47Speaker 3: got a divorce, or I didn't make that thing that
- 14:50Speaker 3: I was supposed to do and everybody knew I was
- 14:51Speaker 3: going to do it. Because that's grief too, when you
- 14:53Speaker 3: don't achieve the goals of people think you should, and
- 14:56Speaker 3: there's some shame that comes along with it. But what
- 14:59Speaker 3: I am trying to communicate is that that new identity
- 15:02Speaker 3: is okay, it is still valuable, still worthy.
- 15:06Speaker 2: So in what ways let's talk about the latest thing.
- 15:11Speaker 2: In what way recently have you chosen yourself?
- 15:16Speaker 3: Hmmm, Well, look, I think in my career I've always
- 15:20Speaker 3: chosen myself and in this new iteration of me, which
- 15:23Speaker 3: is post corporate life.
- 15:26Speaker 2: By the way, is that fun?
- 15:27Speaker 3: It is so much fun because it's a new version
- 15:30Speaker 3: of myself and I'm experiencing things, I'm exploring different areas.
- 15:36Speaker 3: Sometimes it scares me to death, you know, Like there
- 15:39Speaker 3: are a lot of things that happen in this like
- 15:41Speaker 3: now post corporate career, where now I'm in front of
- 15:44Speaker 3: the camera, I'm on the real house size of Beverly Hills.
- 15:46Speaker 3: Who the hell knew I would ever do that? And
- 15:49Speaker 3: why would I do that?
- 15:50Speaker 2: Did you even think that you would do that?
- 15:53Speaker 3: No, it was not on my plan. Well, first of all,
- 15:55Speaker 3: I famously said I don't have plans. But the truth
- 15:58Speaker 3: is that, like I am in an new space, and
- 16:01Speaker 3: when I was deciding to do this, you know, be
- 16:05Speaker 3: in front of the camera, there were so many detractors,
- 16:08Speaker 3: both who know me, like in my personal life and
- 16:10Speaker 3: who were strangers to me. You know, people who wrote
- 16:12Speaker 3: think pieces about whether or not I had lost my
- 16:15Speaker 3: mojo and that's why I decided to now go to
- 16:18Speaker 3: reality TV. And then people in my personal life who
- 16:21Speaker 3: were like this is embarrassing, bos, like you look, you
- 16:24Speaker 3: have a whole corporate like awarded career, why would you
- 16:28Speaker 3: do this? And for me it was like, look, I
- 16:30Speaker 3: had to choose myself. I had to choose my decision
- 16:33Speaker 3: and my idea. And now, of course there are all
- 16:35Speaker 3: kinds of people who are like, oh, I knew you
- 16:36Speaker 3: could do it. Always, you would be great in front
- 16:40Speaker 3: of the camera.
- 16:40Speaker 2: You know, and you're like, my remember.
- 16:44Speaker 3: Always, always, always, I'm always like, I know, Look, success
- 16:48Speaker 3: has many authors. Okay, if you do something right, everybody
- 16:53Speaker 3: will come and say, oh, I always knew it. I
- 16:55Speaker 3: knew she was smart. I knew she was she's so charismatic,
- 16:58Speaker 3: she's so great in front of the camera. Oh yeah,
- 17:00Speaker 3: two years ago you told me that I would be
- 17:03Speaker 3: embarrassing myself, you know. And so I do think that,
- 17:06Speaker 3: like in sometimes in the face of others doubt, choosing
- 17:11Speaker 3: yourself is very very powerful.
- 17:13Speaker 2: So last thing, because I know, I think they're waiting
- 17:15Speaker 2: for you outside. What's your advice for anyone in a
- 17:21Speaker 2: situation where they don't feel like they know who they are,
- 17:24Speaker 2: they're having trouble figuring out what their next steps can be.
- 17:27Speaker 2: They're just having this identity moment where they are trying
- 17:30Speaker 2: to navigate something that they don't even know how to
- 17:33Speaker 2: kind of swim through. What's your advice?
- 17:35Speaker 3: Okay? So the thing about identity is such, it's tied
- 17:39Speaker 3: to so many things. It also feeds imposter syndrome and
- 17:42Speaker 3: all these other variables that show up in your life
- 17:46Speaker 3: because you feel like who am I and what do
- 17:48Speaker 3: I do? So there's a couple of things. Let's go
- 17:51Speaker 3: back to the math.
- 17:52Speaker 2: Okay, yes, I love math now and science.
- 17:56Speaker 3: Okay, you think you're just sitting here and you're just
- 17:58Speaker 3: ploped down on the planet. Okay, and now you got
- 18:00Speaker 3: to figure out life. Well, girl, look for like twelve
- 18:05Speaker 3: generations back, if you go back from that, it took
- 18:09Speaker 3: four thousand people for you to exist. Okay, So let's
- 18:13Speaker 3: start there with that identity, which is that there are
- 18:15Speaker 3: so many people who came together cosmos and all to
- 18:21Speaker 3: create you individual person. Like, first of all, you're super
- 18:23Speaker 3: special and you are unique, and it is a miracle
- 18:28Speaker 3: that you exist at all. So let's start there. Every
- 18:30Speaker 3: time you enter a room, just think of yourself that way.
- 18:33Speaker 3: You came with four thousand people right into every room
- 18:37Speaker 3: you're in. Now, what does that mean about your identity? Well,
- 18:40Speaker 3: the history, the experiences, the way that you are is
- 18:45Speaker 3: absolutely unique. There is no one else like you on
- 18:48Speaker 3: the planet, and so why is it that we keep
- 18:51Speaker 3: looking outside of ourselves for that identity? Again, you look to,
- 18:56Speaker 3: you know, somebody that you admire, and maybe you're like, oh, man,
- 18:59Speaker 3: I wish I could be more like her, or I
- 19:00Speaker 3: wish I could be more like him. Well, that's a
- 19:03Speaker 3: wonderful like aspiration. But I think it's much more powerful
- 19:07Speaker 3: to look within yourself and say, Okay, what do I contribute?
- 19:10Speaker 3: Like what is it that I have? And again, it
- 19:12Speaker 3: doesn't have to be like some mountain climbing expedition that
- 19:15Speaker 3: you led. You know. It's like I think people who
- 19:17Speaker 3: are able to connect names and faces and never forget
- 19:19Speaker 3: are super special. God can't do that. I can't. I
- 19:23Speaker 3: can't remember, you know. Or the people who knit very
- 19:25Speaker 3: well amazing. You can take two sticks together and make
- 19:29Speaker 3: au sweater fantastic.
- 19:30Speaker 4: You know.
- 19:30Speaker 3: I just think that there's so many talents that we
- 19:33Speaker 3: have that we dismiss because we think it's not big
- 19:36Speaker 3: enough to talk about. And so one of the practices
- 19:40Speaker 3: I always advise people is practice bragging on yourself, you know,
- 19:44Speaker 3: practice it. I know, sometimes it feels uncomfortable because you're like,
- 19:47Speaker 3: you know, the people that brag that you're annoyed by
- 19:50Speaker 3: the ones that you're just like, God, I wish it
- 19:51Speaker 3: would shut up, you know what I mean. But that's
- 19:54Speaker 3: not But that's not what we're talking about. I'm talking
- 19:56Speaker 3: about the things that are special to you that you do.
- 19:58Speaker 3: It's like practice talking about I'd just talking about it
- 20:01Speaker 3: with your group chat, you know, tell them what you
- 20:04Speaker 3: did yesterday that was like so cool. Yeah, I practiced
- 20:07Speaker 3: doing that, and you'll find that you'll begin to empower
- 20:10Speaker 3: yourself in the ways in which you actually do contribute
- 20:12Speaker 3: every single day.
- 20:14Speaker 2: Love that You're amazing than I had a great time
- 20:17Speaker 2: with you. We have Ben Higgins here. How are you?
- 20:27Speaker 5: I'm so good?
- 20:28Speaker 2: What was it? What was it like coming in here
- 20:29Speaker 2: and seeing all the people, all the happy chaos, so
- 20:34Speaker 2: excited for this event today.
- 20:36Speaker 3: This is awesome.
- 20:37Speaker 5: I just flew in. I landed in Ubert right here,
- 20:40Speaker 5: so I pulled about front and there's like this line
- 20:42Speaker 5: of very excited people outside, and honestly, I knew like
- 20:48Speaker 5: the concept of what I was coming to. I didn't
- 20:51Speaker 5: realize the energy that I was walking into. And it's
- 20:55Speaker 5: it's gonna be a lot of fun. People are very excited.
- 20:57Speaker 2: They're very excited. I love seeing the chat and everyone
- 21:00Speaker 2: just kind of like running into each other and saying everything,
- 21:03Speaker 2: you have so much going on in your life. I mean, hello,
- 21:06Speaker 2: you just landed here, so welcome back to LA. You're
- 21:10Speaker 2: a dad now, Yeah, you have a one year old
- 21:12Speaker 2: daughter named Winnie. Yes, how has been a girl dad
- 21:16Speaker 2: given you a different level of understanding and compassion toward women? Oh?
- 21:20Speaker 5: My goodness. Well, I mean I think when when speaking
- 21:23Speaker 5: about my daughter, there is a lot of compassion, There
- 21:27Speaker 5: is a lot of protection.
- 21:30Speaker 3: But I you know, my prayer.
- 21:33Speaker 5: Every night over her is that she is a gift
- 21:36Speaker 5: from God above for all of us. And what I
- 21:40Speaker 5: mean by that is, I think when she goes down
- 21:43Speaker 5: to the world and even today as a fourteen month
- 21:45Speaker 5: old little girl, like her interactions with people changes her
- 21:50Speaker 5: experience and changes others. So my hope is that she
- 21:53Speaker 5: just feels free to make the world a better place
- 21:57Speaker 5: every second she can.
- 21:59Speaker 2: You mentioned the word protection. Ten fifteen years from now,
- 22:05Speaker 2: that protection is going to look a little different as
- 22:08Speaker 2: a girl. Dad. Sure are you what are you doing
- 22:12Speaker 2: to prepare for those moments? How are you navigating that
- 22:16Speaker 2: knowing that, you know, we've got the teenagers on the way,
- 22:20Speaker 2: we've got the college years on the way. And I
- 22:22Speaker 2: do think it's really important for other men to identify
- 22:24Speaker 2: too as parents in general. What does that look like?
- 22:28Speaker 2: How do you prepare yourself mentally? How do you make
- 22:30Speaker 2: sure that you allow your daughter enough space but also
- 22:34Speaker 2: know when to add that protection in.
- 22:37Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, I think when my wife and I
- 22:40Speaker 5: were talking about starting a family, it all goes back
- 22:43Speaker 5: to parenting styles and parents are so important and so valuable,
- 22:46Speaker 5: but they can only do so much. And I think
- 22:49Speaker 5: that's one of the things we have to realize is
- 22:50Speaker 5: there's a limit to, you know, how much protection we
- 22:53Speaker 5: can keep on them. We're not going to keep them
- 22:55Speaker 5: in a bubble their whole lives, right, And so a
- 22:57Speaker 5: lot of it is just having an open, honest conversation
- 23:00Speaker 5: about anything that comes up. I want to be honest
- 23:03Speaker 5: with her about decisions. I made mistakes, I've made good decisions,
- 23:08Speaker 5: I've made everything that she wants to talk about. I
- 23:12Speaker 5: hope that she feels like at some level she can
- 23:14Speaker 5: come to me, and if not me, then my wife,
- 23:17Speaker 5: because ultimately she is going to go out there on
- 23:19Speaker 5: our own one day, and I want her to know
- 23:22Speaker 5: the experiences that we had so she can maybe prepare herself.
- 23:26Speaker 5: But I also know that we have a lot of
- 23:28Speaker 5: faith that there is a protector. But then outside of that,
- 23:33Speaker 5: I know that she's going to make mistakes, and it's
- 23:36Speaker 5: knowing who you are, I think internally to bounce back
- 23:40Speaker 5: and to be able to switch gears and to try
- 23:43Speaker 5: to do better the next time and the next time
- 23:45Speaker 5: and the next time and over time. If you do
- 23:47Speaker 5: that enough, I think there's a character that builds in
- 23:49Speaker 5: you that I would love for her to exemplify. So
- 23:54Speaker 5: the answer, like shortly is I will always have a
- 23:57Speaker 5: protection over her, Right, she's my little girl, But at
- 24:00Speaker 5: some point she's going to go off on her own,
- 24:02Speaker 5: and I can do what I can't now to know
- 24:04Speaker 5: that she can always call me or that we can
- 24:06Speaker 5: always talk. And I hope she's prepared to enter the
- 24:10Speaker 5: world with a clearer lens than maybe what we would
- 24:13Speaker 5: do if we filtered her from too much.
- 24:15Speaker 2: You're creating that safe space that's really important as a parent. Yeah,
- 24:19Speaker 2: speaking of women, a lot happening right now in reality TV. Right,
- 24:24Speaker 2: you're Ashley, right, She's a cast member on Real Housewives
- 24:28Speaker 2: of Rhode Island. What has it been like for you
- 24:32Speaker 2: to see her stuff into that role?
- 24:33Speaker 5: I just told her sister this week I co host
- 24:36Speaker 5: the Breakdown with her sister, I said, you know, if
- 24:39Speaker 5: I looked at like the top five women in my life,
- 24:42Speaker 5: Ashley is one of the top five that I like.
- 24:45Speaker 5: I feel the love for the most. I've been with
- 24:47Speaker 5: her for ten years hosting this show. I wouldn't call
- 24:51Speaker 5: her my work wife because she has an incredible husband
- 24:53Speaker 5: at home and I have an incredible wife. She's like
- 24:55Speaker 5: a sister to me, so watching her on the show
- 24:58Speaker 5: makes me very nervous. But I'm so and I don't
- 25:02Speaker 5: even know if this would mean anything to her, but
- 25:03Speaker 5: I'm so proud of her because through watching it, she's
- 25:06Speaker 5: carried herself in the way that I know her right.
- 25:09Speaker 5: She is goofy and she is vulnerable, and she shows
- 25:13Speaker 5: all sides of her right. She can put on makeup,
- 25:15Speaker 5: pull her hair back, put address on and go out
- 25:18Speaker 5: to some glam party, but where she's most comfortable is
- 25:21Speaker 5: with her kids picking out her earrings and slapping her
- 25:24Speaker 5: in the face and getting dirt on her hands. And
- 25:26Speaker 5: she's shown all sides of that on a show where
- 25:28Speaker 5: I think it could be hard to show that because
- 25:30Speaker 5: everybody else is dressed up all the time and trying
- 25:32Speaker 5: to show their best selves. I think when we watch it,
- 25:35Speaker 5: we get the Ashley that's relatable, and that's what we've
- 25:38Speaker 5: fallen in love with. That's why our show's been successful
- 25:40Speaker 5: for ten years, and that's why I think she'll be
- 25:43Speaker 5: successful for years to come.
- 25:45Speaker 2: This is great. What have you learned from Ashley over
- 25:49Speaker 2: the years through your friendship? Because you speak of her
- 25:51Speaker 2: so highly and you spend so much time with her,
- 25:54Speaker 2: what's the one thing that you can take away from
- 25:56Speaker 2: her that you're like, oh, I learned that from I
- 25:58Speaker 2: learned that from Ashley.
- 26:00Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, Ashley's one to not give advice and
- 26:04Speaker 5: less asked. And so I've witnessed a lot from Ashley
- 26:09Speaker 5: by just watching her live life. And one thing that
- 26:11Speaker 5: I could one hundred percent take away that I would
- 26:13Speaker 5: say has been so clear to me is she And
- 26:18Speaker 5: this sounds so simple, but she sees the best in people,
- 26:21Speaker 5: like she loves the people that have come from reality
- 26:23Speaker 5: television who maybe aren't beloved by all, because she just
- 26:26Speaker 5: sees that little spark that says no, I like this
- 26:30Speaker 5: about you. It's made me more inclusive in my love
- 26:33Speaker 5: for others and made me less judgmental from or maybe
- 26:37Speaker 5: less critical from the start. She finds this joy in
- 26:44Speaker 5: everybody's stories, and she allows people into her life, no
- 26:47Speaker 5: matter what their time on television was, no matter how
- 26:51Speaker 5: the world knows them. I think that's something to admire.
- 26:54Speaker 5: I think it's something that the world needs more of.
- 26:58Speaker 5: And I've seen it for ten years straight, just her
- 27:01Speaker 5: giving a big hug to anybody that needs it.
- 27:03Speaker 2: And a lot of people do need those big so
- 27:05Speaker 2: it's nice that she does that. Let's talk about while
- 27:07Speaker 2: you're here today, I choose me. Can you tell us
- 27:11Speaker 2: about some daily habits that you might have where you
- 27:14Speaker 2: choose yourself and make sure you stay true to yourself,
- 27:17Speaker 2: or recently, what's the one thing that you've done that
- 27:19Speaker 2: you're like, I need to do this today for myself.
- 27:22Speaker 5: Yeah, it's you know, it's changed in the last fourteen
- 27:25Speaker 5: months with being a dad.
- 27:27Speaker 3: But I.
- 27:29Speaker 5: Like to break up my especially since marriage and becoming
- 27:32Speaker 5: a father and having a job. I like to break
- 27:37Speaker 5: it up into some categories. So like my physical health
- 27:41Speaker 5: right now, I'm on one hundred push up a day,
- 27:44Speaker 5: challenge for the whole year. Wow, and so far I
- 27:47Speaker 5: have one hundred push ups a day. We are going into.
- 27:49Speaker 2: May, bravo.
- 27:50Speaker 3: I want to keep it up.
- 27:51Speaker 5: Wow, I haven't got them in today. So you could
- 27:53Speaker 5: see me in the in the green room probably before this.
- 27:56Speaker 2: Can we do them together? I want to take a
- 27:58Speaker 2: video of this.
- 27:59Speaker 5: Yeah, we can be amazing undercent. You're fully invited into this.
- 28:03Speaker 5: That's one thing. And then I walk. I try to
- 28:05Speaker 5: get six miles in a day of walking. So a
- 28:08Speaker 5: lot of walks of my dog, a lot of meetings
- 28:09Speaker 5: on the phone. That's my physical health. That's the standard
- 28:12Speaker 5: I'll set Now. Sundays there's a run. Sundays are a lift.
- 28:15Speaker 5: Spiritual health is I wake up every day, I open
- 28:18Speaker 5: up my Bible, I pray, I meditate on that, I contemplate.
- 28:22Speaker 5: I just take some time to take some deep breaths
- 28:24Speaker 5: to prepare myself for the day ahead. And then relationally,
- 28:28Speaker 5: I have a note on my phone with friends that
- 28:31Speaker 5: I need to contact, and so I open up that
- 28:34Speaker 5: note and contact a friend every day that I haven't
- 28:38Speaker 5: talked to in a while that I want to check
- 28:40Speaker 5: in on and just say hey, I was just thinking
- 28:42Speaker 5: about you and then you know, with my wife, we
- 28:45Speaker 5: sit down for dinner every night and we ask each
- 28:48Speaker 5: other the same question every night, what was your highlight
- 28:50Speaker 5: and what was your low light of the day, Instead
- 28:52Speaker 5: of saying how was your day, because that's ambiguous at times,
- 28:55Speaker 5: it's what was your highlight? What was your low light?
- 28:57Speaker 5: And then we can dive in from there. So it's
- 28:59Speaker 5: just I think for me, it's the communication, it's the intentionality,
- 29:03Speaker 5: and it's staying committed to a few things that I
- 29:05Speaker 5: think are important and that will change, you know, year
- 29:08Speaker 5: by year, month by month.
- 29:10Speaker 2: That's great.
- 29:11Speaker 5: Thank you, yeah, thank you.
- 29:19Speaker 2: You have a man of clues here. Thank you so
- 29:21Speaker 2: much for being here. And this has been such a
- 29:24Speaker 2: day that's been so vibrant. You can just hear I know,
- 29:27Speaker 2: it's quiet in here where you can hear all the
- 29:28Speaker 2: chatter outside. What is it like walking through and seeing
- 29:31Speaker 2: so many people here for this event today?
- 29:33Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, it's amazing.
- 29:35Speaker 2: Not only that.
- 29:35Speaker 4: I was taking a fitness class this morning, I know,
- 29:38Speaker 4: and this time, well, you know, luckily it all worked out.
- 29:42Speaker 4: And I'm walking into the class and this girl goes,
- 29:45Speaker 4: are you amda clutes?
- 29:46Speaker 2: And I was like, yeah.
- 29:47Speaker 4: She goes you're speaking at the I Choose Me event
- 29:49Speaker 4: and I'm going to go there, and I can't believe,
- 29:51Speaker 4: like we're taking a fit this class together.
- 29:52Speaker 2: That I'm see you at the other and I was like,
- 29:54Speaker 2: you'll see me at the event.
- 29:55Speaker 4: I'm so glad you're coming. So yes, this event is
- 29:57Speaker 4: a popular hot commodity and Los Angeles today. I'm happy
- 30:01Speaker 4: to be here.
- 30:02Speaker 2: You know, it really is. And I do feel like
- 30:03Speaker 2: that speaks to the moment of time we're in with
- 30:06Speaker 2: women supporting women, with women wanting to help other women
- 30:10Speaker 2: become and feel empowered. And just watching your story, watching
- 30:16Speaker 2: all the things you've done in your career, I feel
- 30:18Speaker 2: like you can really connect with women in that way.
- 30:22Speaker 2: Tell me why it was important for you to participate
- 30:25Speaker 2: in the event today, and what do you hope the
- 30:27Speaker 2: audience takes away from it.
- 30:29Speaker 4: You know, I'm just really big on sharing stories and
- 30:32Speaker 4: I didn't really ever think that I would be that
- 30:35Speaker 4: person until you have a strong story to tell, and
- 30:39Speaker 4: then you know, when we share our stories, it just
- 30:42Speaker 4: helps so many people, and then that builds a bigger community,
- 30:45Speaker 4: and we need a community in order to get through life.
- 30:48Speaker 4: So I just I want people to listen today, you know,
- 30:53Speaker 4: and take something away from I think the honesty and
- 30:58Speaker 4: the vulnerability that will probably all show up there, because
- 31:01Speaker 4: it's just important to sit back and realize that we
- 31:05Speaker 4: are all the same, and we all go through a
- 31:08Speaker 4: lot of the same things, and we can't help each other.
- 31:12Speaker 2: Wonderfully said, let's talk about your memoir. Okay, so you
- 31:15Speaker 2: share very openly about losing your husband Nick and the
- 31:19Speaker 2: support you received during that time. How did the sense
- 31:23Speaker 2: of community shape your healing then? And also now?
- 31:28Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, well, you know, remember COVID. I was
- 31:31Speaker 4: living alone. I had a ten month old baby, and
- 31:35Speaker 4: I was by myself, and I mean talk about just
- 31:40Speaker 4: being feeling and being completely alone while your husband is
- 31:44Speaker 4: in the ICU fighting for his life. And so I
- 31:49Speaker 4: had this I started this community online of people all
- 31:53Speaker 4: over the world, and every day at three pm, I'd
- 31:56Speaker 4: go online and they would show up and they would
- 31:59Speaker 4: sing with me from my husband, and they would dance
- 32:02Speaker 4: with me, and they would pray for us. And it
- 32:04Speaker 4: was like this support in a time where we were
- 32:08Speaker 4: all completely alone. And I don't think I could have
- 32:13Speaker 4: survived without that community, I really don't. I think that
- 32:17Speaker 4: was again, it was one of the first times that
- 32:19Speaker 4: I realized how important going through something together is versus
- 32:23Speaker 4: being completely alone going through something. They still show up
- 32:28Speaker 4: for me to this day. I mean, I love when
- 32:30Speaker 4: I get a DM they're like, I've been with you
- 32:32Speaker 4: since you know, twenty twenty and I'm still praying for
- 32:36Speaker 4: you and elvis it means the world.
- 32:38Speaker 2: I do feel like it's really difficult for people to
- 32:41Speaker 2: grieve with community. A lot of people like to grieve
- 32:44Speaker 2: in silence. A lot of people don't want to show
- 32:47Speaker 2: that side of them being vulnerable in some capacity, or
- 32:50Speaker 2: maybe they're just not ready to talk about it. What
- 32:53Speaker 2: advice do you have for them? Given the community you
- 32:57Speaker 2: had and how helpful you said it was.
- 32:59Speaker 4: Yes, great point. I know a lot of people like
- 33:02Speaker 4: this that just can't even talk about their grief. But
- 33:05Speaker 4: that's where I will, like really suggest that you read books,
- 33:10Speaker 4: listen to podcasts, do everything you can to build even
- 33:15Speaker 4: if even it's a silent community for yourself, because the
- 33:18Speaker 4: problem is is trauma and grief especially like you feel
- 33:21Speaker 4: so alone and you feel like no one's going to
- 33:24Speaker 4: understand your pain. You know, it's like like, well no
- 33:27Speaker 4: one will get this. No one else lost their husband
- 33:30Speaker 4: and then you meet somebody or here's somebody else's story
- 33:33Speaker 4: on a podcast. Let's say, if you don't want to
- 33:36Speaker 4: go to a grief group or you know, find a
- 33:38Speaker 4: friend and you're like, oh, there's somebody else out.
- 33:41Speaker 2: There that lost their husband.
- 33:43Speaker 4: Of course, right, Like I'm not the only widow in
- 33:45Speaker 4: the world, of course there is. But grief can make
- 33:48Speaker 4: you feel like that. It can make you feel like
- 33:50Speaker 4: no one understands, but they do. And when you find
- 33:54Speaker 4: somebody that understands your grief and your trauma and your pain,
- 33:58Speaker 4: it's life changing. So I would just say start small,
- 34:02Speaker 4: you know, listen to these podcasts, read some books. Just
- 34:05Speaker 4: start to feel like you have other people out there
- 34:08Speaker 4: in the world that understand what you're going through. Read
- 34:12Speaker 4: my book, Live Your Life.
- 34:13Speaker 2: It's a great way to start.
- 34:14Speaker 4: It's a positive but you know, has a lot of
- 34:17Speaker 4: things intertwined in it.
- 34:19Speaker 2: I mean, and there's so many different things that you
- 34:20Speaker 2: can learn from not only listening to the podcast, reading
- 34:23Speaker 2: the books, talking to people, or just getting out of
- 34:26Speaker 2: your home essentially, because I know a lot of people
- 34:29Speaker 2: who dealt with that who just decide to, you know,
- 34:32Speaker 2: not really want to see the world until they're ready
- 34:36Speaker 2: let's talk about how you were able to balance community,
- 34:40Speaker 2: balance grief, but also figure out the way to stay
- 34:43Speaker 2: empowered and keep going because you've done so many amazing
- 34:48Speaker 2: things throughout the years, you know, but you've gone through
- 34:52Speaker 2: so much.
- 34:53Speaker 4: Yes, I think it's a little bit of a twofold.
- 34:55Speaker 4: I do feel like a strong responsibility for my son
- 35:01Speaker 4: to be both parents and to do everything I possibly
- 35:05Speaker 4: can to give him like the best and most amazing life.
- 35:09Speaker 4: And I promised Nick that I would show him the world.
- 35:11Speaker 4: So like I'm just I'm a hustler for one of
- 35:15Speaker 4: you know, that's one of the reasons, you know, Like
- 35:17Speaker 4: I feel like it's my duty to show up and
- 35:20Speaker 4: to create a beautiful life for him and for myself
- 35:25Speaker 4: and for us. I know that's what Nick would want
- 35:27Speaker 4: me to do. And then the other half of that
- 35:30Speaker 4: is that since I've been eighteen, I've been a hustler.
- 35:32Speaker 4: I am just like a creative cat that I love
- 35:34Speaker 4: doing a million thousand things. I love to work. I've
- 35:37Speaker 4: always had to take care of myself, so like it's
- 35:40Speaker 4: just never gone anywhere, you know what I mean. So
- 35:42Speaker 4: it's like it's like that on top of you know,
- 35:45Speaker 4: doing it for my late husband.
- 35:48Speaker 2: I also want to talk about the the projects. You
- 35:52Speaker 2: mentioned that you're a hustler. We got to talk about Proper. Yes,
- 35:55Speaker 2: because hydration is essential, Yes, it is. So tell me
- 35:59Speaker 2: about this project and why you wanted to launch it.
- 36:01Speaker 3: Yes.
- 36:02Speaker 4: Well, you know, I've been in the fitness and wellness
- 36:04Speaker 4: industry for over twenty years. I've had my own fitness
- 36:06Speaker 4: company for ten years, and I've always thought it about
- 36:10Speaker 4: creating products because over the years, I've influenced so many products,
- 36:14Speaker 4: and I've done and supported other products, and I've just
- 36:18Speaker 4: never found one that I thought was affordable and tasted
- 36:21Speaker 4: good and was good for you.
- 36:22Speaker 3: And I was like, it's time.
- 36:24Speaker 4: I want to make something that you know, makes people
- 36:28Speaker 4: feel good if that's the only thing they can do
- 36:30Speaker 4: for themselves that day. Because I'm a busy mom. You know,
- 36:34Speaker 4: we are busy people, and sometimes we only have the
- 36:37Speaker 4: ability to put a scoop of something good into our water,
- 36:39Speaker 4: shake it up and keep it with us. That's a
- 36:41Speaker 4: good thing that day, you know what I mean. And
- 36:43Speaker 4: I didn't want it to cost a million dollars and
- 36:46Speaker 4: I wanted it to taste good.
- 36:47Speaker 2: So I created Proper.
- 36:49Speaker 4: It's a line of supplements and then we just launched
- 36:51Speaker 4: hydration powders so that every can stay hydrated, which is
- 36:54Speaker 4: so important. And I'm loving it and it's so fun
- 36:58Speaker 4: again to like hear the response and hear how people
- 37:01Speaker 4: are loving it and appreciate it and using it every
- 37:04Speaker 4: day and how it's changing their lives. And you know,
- 37:06Speaker 4: now we have this like proper community that I'm obsessed with.
- 37:09Speaker 2: I love the enthusiasm because I can feel how excited
- 37:12Speaker 2: you are about it in person. Last week, because I
- 37:15Speaker 2: know you got to run and go up on stage.
- 37:18Speaker 2: What was the last thing you did where you said
- 37:21Speaker 2: you know, I choose me in this moment? Was what
- 37:23Speaker 2: was the last thing you did to make sure that
- 37:24Speaker 2: you chose yourself?
- 37:25Speaker 4: Oh wow, gosh, that is a good question.
- 37:30Speaker 2: You're like fitness this morning, because I needed to go
- 37:33Speaker 2: do that before I came to this event.
- 37:34Speaker 4: Honestly, you know what, that is a good good callback.
- 37:38Speaker 4: Fitness every day for me is important and it doesn't
- 37:40Speaker 4: always have to be like a strenuous hour workout. It
- 37:43Speaker 4: could easily just be ten minutes of jumping rope in
- 37:45Speaker 4: my house or a walk, but that is my consistent
- 37:50Speaker 4: daily I choose me is that workout for myself and
- 37:53Speaker 4: it's all mental health. I've talked to Jenny about it,
- 37:55Speaker 4: like we both are like no, no, no. Fitness is
- 37:57Speaker 4: mental health. It's anxiety and stress relief. It is my
- 38:00Speaker 4: time for myself to feel good, to move my body.
- 38:04Speaker 4: I truly believe that moving your body is a privilege.
- 38:07Speaker 4: It is it is we are. We should be grateful
- 38:10Speaker 4: to be able to move. That's something death taught me.
- 38:13Speaker 4: So like I'm just I go into every workout with
- 38:16Speaker 4: like this is a privilege. I'm moving my body today
- 38:18Speaker 4: and that's yeah, my daily I choose me moment.
- 38:22Speaker 2: I love it. That's a good one. Thank you, thank you.
- 38:25Speaker 1: Okay, can you even believe Bozima, Ben and Amanda, I
- 38:30Speaker 1: mean the love and inspiration beyond. We're just getting started though,
- 38:35Speaker 1: you guys, so please stay tuned for more and please
- 38:39Speaker 1: choose yourself today.