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89: Dragons of Another Bestiary · Dungeonpedia

0:00
SPEAKER_00: You the adventurer.
0:02
SPEAKER_00: Yes, you.
0:03
SPEAKER_00: Do you desire knowledge of immense worlds and arcane power?
0:07
SPEAKER_00: A codex of untold stories and lore?
0:10
SPEAKER_00: Or perhaps simply easy listening for your daily commute.
0:13
SPEAKER_00: Then feast your eyes, or more accurately, yes, upon Dungeon Pedia.
0:19
SPEAKER_00: Shit's about to get nerdy in here.
0:46
SPEAKER_04: Taylor Stanfield.
0:47
SPEAKER_02: And I'm Travis Beasley.
0:49
SPEAKER_02: And also, in case you are not following us on Twitter or just haven't happened to see it, uh Taylor and I are now officially engaged.
1:01
SPEAKER_04: We are.
1:02
SPEAKER_04: What?
1:03
SPEAKER_04: Shut up.
1:04
SPEAKER_04: You didn't Don't even.
1:06
SPEAKER_02: Don't don't even try.
1:08
SPEAKER_02: You knew before almost everybody else did.
1:10
SPEAKER_03: I yeah, I think I yeah, I I literally did.
1:13
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:14
SPEAKER_03: Like that only really makes sense if you were there for the bit before we started recording, which you wouldn't have been.
1:23
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:23
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:24
SPEAKER_03: So probably.
1:25
SPEAKER_03: Unless.
1:27
SPEAKER_03: Is our FBI agent listening to this?
1:29
SPEAKER_02: Probably.
1:30
SPEAKER_02: They'd have they'd have heard it.
1:32
SPEAKER_02: With all of our search history, probably.
1:34
SPEAKER_03: Oh god, yeah, we're on we're on some lists, certainly.
1:38
SPEAKER_03: Almost certainly, yes.
1:39
SPEAKER_02: Like we have to be.
1:40
SPEAKER_02: But yeah, uh, we went out on our little anniversary.
1:45
SPEAKER_02: Anniversary vacation, and uh I decided that that was gonna be the best time.
1:50
SPEAKER_02: And it was.
1:52
SPEAKER_03: And it was if it would have been if it would have been on any other day, she would have said no.
1:56
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
1:57
SPEAKER_02: Precisely we are now engaged and in the wedding planning process, which is interesting.
2:07
SPEAKER_03: Um, send your RSVPs to no.
2:12
SPEAKER_02: No.
2:12
SPEAKER_03: No, no.
2:14
SPEAKER_02: No.
2:14
SPEAKER_02: We haven't even got to that point yet, please.
2:17
SPEAKER_03: God.
2:18
SPEAKER_02: Please.
2:19
SPEAKER_03: Oh, yeah.
2:19
SPEAKER_03: Did you guys have to account for the fact that we're gonna invite all of our listeners to your wedding?
2:25
SPEAKER_03: Do you think the venues you're looking at can handle that?
2:29
SPEAKER_02: No.
2:30
SPEAKER_02: Like, I I don't know how many concurrent listeners we actually have, but I'm almost certain that it is way over the limit to the venues we've looked at.
2:42
SPEAKER_04: Or the ones that are way outside of our budget.
2:44
SPEAKER_03: Okay, that can be our next Twitter poll.
2:46
SPEAKER_03: Would you in person attend Taylor Travis this one?
2:50
SPEAKER_03: God, no.
2:54
SPEAKER_04: So anyway, off of that.
2:56
SPEAKER_02: Yes, off of that, uh, we just wanted to make the announcement on the podcast, just in case, like I said, you didn't see it on Twitter, you're not following us either way.
3:06
SPEAKER_03: Another time that you we make like a casual reference to you guys being engaged or whatever, and somebody who didn't know is like, What?
3:14
SPEAKER_04: What?
3:14
SPEAKER_04: When did that happen?
3:15
SPEAKER_03: Surprise! Yay!
3:17
SPEAKER_04: Now you're in the mess.
3:18
SPEAKER_03: Yay! Also on the uh on the note of of jewelry of the less exciting variety, I did get my tongue pierced like eight days ago, and the difficulty speaking is mostly gone.
3:34
SPEAKER_02: But like, if you hear a oh weird, just a little weird there's a weird lisp or something.
3:41
SPEAKER_03: So don't clock don't clog me on it, or do.
3:44
SPEAKER_03: I really don't care, but I'm just letting you know.
3:46
SPEAKER_03: That's why.
3:46
SPEAKER_02: That's why she decided to put a hole in it.
3:48
SPEAKER_03: Listen, I'm just really I'm just really excited about it, okay?
3:50
SPEAKER_04: Look, it it's exciting.
3:51
SPEAKER_04: It's very exciting.
3:52
SPEAKER_04: You should you should you should be happy to share the news with people.
3:55
SPEAKER_03: That you can't see it, but I'm blapping right now.
3:58
SPEAKER_02: Uh speaking of that, uh, so what uh what have you got for us on this episode?
4:05
SPEAKER_03: I have a dragons.
4:08
SPEAKER_03: We're back.
4:08
SPEAKER_03: We're back to that.
4:10
SPEAKER_02: We have more dragons.
4:11
SPEAKER_03: We do.
4:12
SPEAKER_03: You guys, there's so many fucking kinds of dragons, I swear to god.
4:15
SPEAKER_02: There are so many dragons.
4:16
SPEAKER_03: Um, um, Travis, I believe in your uh episode, this is kind of a a meeting of the minds of Taylor and Travis's last episodes.
4:30
SPEAKER_03: Like converged because uh I don't have any original thoughts and I just have to steal all of my ideas from my friends and peers.
4:41
SPEAKER_03: So Okay.
4:43
SPEAKER_03: Um, Travis, in the barghist episode, you mentioned the was it the bargest?
4:48
SPEAKER_03: You mentioned the dragon's bestiary.
4:50
SPEAKER_03: Uh yes, I believe so.
4:52
SPEAKER_03: Which was a um recurring segment, I guess, of um Dragon Magazine for a period of time.
5:01
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
5:02
SPEAKER_03: And Taylor, your uh last episode, was long dragons.
5:08
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
5:08
SPEAKER_03: So I was like, I just looked at a list of Dragon's Beastaries?
5:14
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, of the Dragon's Beastie um columns.
5:17
SPEAKER_03: Columns, that was the word I was looking for.
5:19
SPEAKER_03: And I guess it's their kind of I think they they do they've done some of them separate from this um sort of release schedule, I guess.
5:30
SPEAKER_03: But I believe they traditionally did a Dragon's Bestiary article on dragons um annually, like on kind of I guess what would be like the anniversary issue of uh the Dragon's Bestiary.
5:48
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
5:48
SPEAKER_03: So there were a handful um of these specifically about dragons.
5:52
SPEAKER_03: And so I was like, oh, these are pretty interesting.
5:55
SPEAKER_03: And most of them, well, some of them do appear in other editions and what have you, for the most part, it kind of works.
6:04
SPEAKER_03: They work as their own self-contained thing, so that way you don't have to listen to me list off ten different dates for ten different source books, and also maybe as a a series of of appetizers or d'oeuvres, if you will, before maybe a more um substantial look at more widely published types of dragons, let's say.
6:27
SPEAKER_02: Okay, so we have a whole bunch of just different kinds of dragons.
6:32
SPEAKER_02: Random kinds of dragons.
6:34
SPEAKER_03: Dragons.
6:35
SPEAKER_03: Dragons.
6:36
SPEAKER_03: Specialty dragons, essentially.
6:38
SPEAKER_03: Okay, today we are going to be looking at Dragon Magazine issue 134, which was published in 1988.
6:47
SPEAKER_03: And the article is entitled The Dragon's Beast Theory, Dragons of Earth, Sea, and Space.
6:53
SPEAKER_02: Dragons of Space.
6:56
SPEAKER_02: Sorry, I like space.
6:58
SPEAKER_04: No, I mean yeah.
6:59
SPEAKER_04: I mean, space is pretty cool.
7:01
SPEAKER_04: It just I the reason I was laughing was because it just was just kind of out there with the other Yeah, space is pretty out there.
7:10
SPEAKER_03: So before we go into the specific types of dragons, there are some, I guess, like parameters that I'm gonna lay out.
7:22
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
7:24
SPEAKER_03: I don't know why that sounds funny.
7:27
SPEAKER_03: Anyway, um, so all of the different types of dragons discussed in this article share a majority of abilities and traits with the more common types of true dragons.
7:41
SPEAKER_03: So unless stated otherwise, all of these dragons, because I mean there are some exceptions, but unless otherwise stated, these different types of dragons share those aspects with true dragons.
7:52
SPEAKER_03: Um these include, but are not, well, I say the more common variety of true dragons, because some of these are true dragons.
7:58
SPEAKER_03: I think they're all meant to be true dragons, but I don't necessarily agree with that.
8:01
SPEAKER_03: We'll talk about that.
8:02
SPEAKER_03: Um so these uh abilities and traits include, but are not limited to, the same age category progression as regular dragons.
8:10
SPEAKER_03: Um, sixty-foot range of infravision senses that allow them to detect hidden slash invisible creatures within one.
8:19
SPEAKER_03: They they use the inch marker, but I'm pretty sure this is like one square.
8:23
SPEAKER_03: So, you know, one five-foot square.
8:26
SPEAKER_02: Because otherwise you'd have to be like right up on the right up on the Which would just make no sense.
8:30
SPEAKER_03: Which would make no sense for a dragon.
8:32
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
8:33
SPEAKER_03: Um, so one square per age level, a fear aura that appears at an adult age, improved saving throws, a penchant for treasure that allows them to be bribed, and an ego that allows them to be flattered.
8:46
SPEAKER_02: Beautiful.
8:47
SPEAKER_03: So, you know, despite some of the things that make these dragons very unique, on the whole, they share most of these characteristics.
8:57
SPEAKER_03: So, uh first we're going to talk about the Aquatic Dragon, which this section was written by Gregory Detweiler.
9:05
SPEAKER_03: Uh thank you, Gregory.
9:07
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I believe we've mentioned him before, and I think it was about dragons.
9:13
SPEAKER_02: Probably.
9:14
SPEAKER_02: He seems to be a uh Dragon Man.
9:16
SPEAKER_02: A dragon man himself.
9:18
SPEAKER_03: Ah, I see you're a man of culture as well.
9:21
SPEAKER_03: So the aquatic dragon is a water-breathing dragon, more closely related to terrestrial dragons than dragon turtles or lung wang, though the aquatic dragon does not have wings and cannot fly.
9:33
SPEAKER_03: Sad.
9:34
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
9:35
SPEAKER_03: I mean they they they get on fine.
9:38
SPEAKER_02: Sad, but also kind of makes sense given aquatic.
9:43
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and they trust me, they get on fine.
9:45
SPEAKER_03: Um, they are about 70 feet long.
9:48
SPEAKER_03: Jesus.
9:48
SPEAKER_03: And sea green in color, with four clawed feet and a spike-tipped tail.
9:53
SPEAKER_03: So they kind of look more like, in my opinion, kind of like, I guess, sharper long dragons.
10:00
SPEAKER_03: You know, like that very traditional, like kind of long serpentine, but they're like less I would say like spikier and less regal looking, if that makes sense.
10:11
SPEAKER_02: They're they they got more spiky bits.
10:13
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
10:14
SPEAKER_02: More pointy edges.
10:16
SPEAKER_03: Um, so they cannot breathe air, but can take in large amounts of water in order to hold their breath for 10 rounds at a time, though this prevents them from using their strong bite attack.
10:27
SPEAKER_03: So they literally just take a big old gulp of water and then get out of the water.
10:32
SPEAKER_03: Kind of like the inverse of what you do before you're gonna be able to do it.
10:34
SPEAKER_02: I was gonna say it's just like the exact opposite of a normal Yeah, I mean, which makes sense.
10:40
SPEAKER_03: So uh this ability allows them to raid vessels on the water surface and communities on nearby coastlines.
10:46
SPEAKER_03: Uh aquatic dragons are viviparous, which means they give birth to live young.
10:51
SPEAKER_03: But um Interesting.
10:53
SPEAKER_03: No elaboration is given on their feelings towards child rearing or just that process at all.
11:00
SPEAKER_04: So they just kind of say, oh yeah, they give birth to live young.
11:03
SPEAKER_03: That's it.
11:04
SPEAKER_04: That's it.
11:04
SPEAKER_04: Don't worry about it.
11:05
SPEAKER_03: That's all you get.
11:06
SPEAKER_03: Don't worry about it.
11:06
SPEAKER_03: We're not gonna we're not gonna discuss how many at a time, or you know, if they just cast them out or if they raise them, we're not gonna talk about how they fuck.
11:18
SPEAKER_03: Just they give birth to live.
11:22
SPEAKER_02: Hey, listen.
11:22
SPEAKER_02: You know what I picture?
11:23
SPEAKER_02: What?
11:24
SPEAKER_02: Like seahorse style.
11:27
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
11:28
SPEAKER_02: Like birth, where there's just so many.
11:31
SPEAKER_02: And I use quotes with this tiny aquatic dragons just like spurting out.
11:38
SPEAKER_04: I mean I think that's what happens.
11:40
SPEAKER_04: That's a vivid image.
11:41
SPEAKER_04: I'm not gonna lie.
11:42
SPEAKER_03: You're very I think that's probably what happens with terrestrial dragons, too.
11:46
SPEAKER_03: They just look a little bit different.
11:48
SPEAKER_03: A little more um Thank you for your hand gestures.
11:53
SPEAKER_03: Y'all know.
11:54
SPEAKER_03: Anyway, uh aquatic dragons are lawful evil for some reason.
11:59
SPEAKER_03: Um Okay.
12:01
SPEAKER_04: This is another one of those, it's it because they can be like it's not like I'm opposed to it.
12:06
SPEAKER_04: I just wish that there was a reason.
12:08
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, well, the thing is is that I don't think there's enough information that's kind of given about their well, their lifestyle, I guess lifestyle, lifestyles of the rich and dragon, um to substantiate either the idea that they would be lawful evil or would not be lawful evil.
12:28
SPEAKER_03: It's just kind of like okay.
12:31
SPEAKER_03: Well, there rather there's not enough to substantiate whether or not they would be lawful or be something else.
12:37
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
12:37
SPEAKER_03: I can say pretty confidently I feel like they're probably evil, but anyway.
12:42
SPEAKER_03: Um aquatic dragons can live in both fresh and salt water as well as in any depth of the ocean due to a magical immunity to changes in water pressure.
12:52
SPEAKER_03: No dragon jam if you bring them up too fast.
12:56
SPEAKER_03: Which is helpful.
12:58
SPEAKER_02: I mean, that is pretty damn useful.
13:00
SPEAKER_02: So they can live at literally any depth and be just totally fine.
13:04
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
13:05
SPEAKER_02: And a little frightening as well.
13:07
SPEAKER_04: It's fine.
13:07
SPEAKER_04: Don't worry about it.
13:08
SPEAKER_04: I I'm going to, thanks.
13:10
SPEAKER_03: Don't worry, don't worry about the ocean, guys.
13:13
SPEAKER_03: It's fine.
13:14
SPEAKER_03: Um, so the entrances of their layers are tangled with seaweed, uh, one strand of which the beast ties around its tail before it goes to bed, thus awakening the dragon if anything tries to enter their layer, thus disturbing the seaweed.
13:27
SPEAKER_03: Which is pretty smart.
13:29
SPEAKER_02: Incredibly smart.
13:31
SPEAKER_03: It's like their own nice little uh uh homemade alarm system.
13:35
SPEAKER_02: I like it.
13:36
SPEAKER_03: Um their layers also frequently feature strangleweed as their pressure resistance and muscular necks make them immune to the strangling effect of the plant.
13:46
SPEAKER_03: So alternatively, like if it feels the the seaweed like pull on its tail and it like wakes up and like cranes its neck over and you're just getting choked out by fucking seaweed.
13:58
SPEAKER_03: And it's like oh, okay, a snack for when I wake up, goes back to bed.
14:04
SPEAKER_02: Fucking strangleweed.
14:05
SPEAKER_02: So they're also immune to strangling effects.
14:08
SPEAKER_03: Well, or just this one.
14:10
SPEAKER_03: Well, see, the thing is is that this is the only one that it says they're immune to, but I feel like this could be one of those cases where that really annoying player, or since it's the dragon more accurately, probably that really annoying DM could be like, you know, I'm gonna take this and say it's immune to all strangling effects.
14:27
SPEAKER_02: Right, because they're not specifically clear on that.
14:30
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
14:31
SPEAKER_03: Okay, sea serpent versus aquatic dragon.
14:35
SPEAKER_03: Like it's like I I guess I'm thinking sea serpent is in like um like Anaconda kind of thing.
14:42
SPEAKER_03: Right.
14:43
SPEAKER_03: Where it would try to strangle it.
14:44
SPEAKER_03: Um, who would win?
14:48
SPEAKER_03: Um place your bets now.
14:51
SPEAKER_03: Not humanity.
14:53
SPEAKER_02: But yeah, humanity just loses altogether in this, like Right, it's fine.
14:58
SPEAKER_03: Actually, we're gonna talk about why the dragon would probably win.
15:02
SPEAKER_03: So um, they are very intelligent.
15:04
SPEAKER_03: Um, their intelligence is categorized as high, and almost all are capable of speech, i.e., 95%.
15:11
SPEAKER_03: Uh, but very few use magic due to the difficulty of acquiring and using spellbooks and scrolls in an underwater environment.
15:18
SPEAKER_03: Because paper.
15:20
SPEAKER_03: Paper is a thing.
15:21
SPEAKER_03: Paper is a thing, and it tends to lose uh just something when it gets wet.
15:30
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I mean, unless they somehow manage to find like new better paper.
15:35
SPEAKER_02: And enchanted paper that is waterproof but can still also be like inked on.
15:41
SPEAKER_03: Laminated paper.
15:44
SPEAKER_03: Okay, yeah, that we answered the question.
15:46
SPEAKER_03: Laminated spell books for your friendly aquatic dragon.
15:50
SPEAKER_02: Yes, but how would you write on it?
15:52
SPEAKER_03: You write on it first and then you laminate it, Travis.
15:54
SPEAKER_03: Duh.
15:55
SPEAKER_02: But how will they do it?
15:57
SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
15:58
SPEAKER_03: Okay, someone is gonna someone, some artificer or whatever is gonna invent a laminator.
16:04
SPEAKER_03: Anyway.
16:05
SPEAKER_03: Thanks for the idea.
16:09
SPEAKER_03: See, some people in DD invent things like guns or whatever.
16:13
SPEAKER_03: Oh no, I'm gonna do that.
16:14
SPEAKER_03: No, he's gonna invent a laminator.
16:16
SPEAKER_04: He's gonna invent them both.
16:18
SPEAKER_04: It's gonna be great.
16:19
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
16:20
SPEAKER_03: A laminating gun.
16:22
SPEAKER_03: How a particularly interested and or determined aquatic dragon uh may have a cavernous portion of their layer filled with air in order to preserve papers.
16:35
SPEAKER_03: So they just, you know.
16:36
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
16:37
SPEAKER_02: I mean that was a good thing.
16:38
SPEAKER_03: I'm imagining like a little bit of like a like a, you know, like you get those caves and stuff.
16:44
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:45
SPEAKER_03: No, I get it.
16:46
SPEAKER_02: It's kind of like if like, you know, a boat tips upside down and sinks, there's like an air pocket that can just sit there even if it's fully submerged.
16:54
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
16:55
SPEAKER_03: True.
16:55
SPEAKER_03: Uh they're also particularly interested in magical items that fill the lungs of the user with water, which water or which air-breathing creatures would deem cursed, uh, as these would allow them to remain out of the water for longer.
17:09
SPEAKER_04: That makes sense.
17:10
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that does make sense.
17:11
SPEAKER_04: I guess basically a potion of air breathing.
17:15
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, essentially.
17:16
SPEAKER_02: Just like a very longer form of my brain died whenever I was trying to say that.
17:23
SPEAKER_03: It just okay.
17:24
SPEAKER_02: It just didn't.
17:25
SPEAKER_03: Hey, sometimes it sometimes it'd be that way.
17:28
SPEAKER_03: People think it don't be that way, but it do.
17:29
SPEAKER_02: But it do.
17:30
SPEAKER_03: So even without prolific use of magic, aquatic dragons are very dangerous.
17:35
SPEAKER_03: Uh they are surprisingly maneuverable when underwater for being so large.
17:40
SPEAKER_03: Um, a little bit less so on land, like they move slower on land, but But they're still dragons.
17:45
SPEAKER_03: They're not, yeah.
17:46
SPEAKER_03: I mean, and like I said, they have legs and feet.
17:48
SPEAKER_03: They're not SOL when they're on land, as long as they um have enough water.
17:52
SPEAKER_03: Um, and in one round, they can use four claw, one bite, and one tail attack.
17:57
SPEAKER_03: I'm sorry.
17:59
SPEAKER_02: What?
18:00
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they literally get one attack for each of their feet.
18:03
SPEAKER_02: They can do six attacks in one round.
18:05
SPEAKER_03: Oh, oh, but if they're I mean, if they're out of the water, then they can only do five.
18:11
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they don't have their bite attack because they gotta keep their mouth closed.
18:14
SPEAKER_03: Oh, what a nerf! I know! What a nerf!
18:17
SPEAKER_02: Get nerfed, son.
18:19
SPEAKER_03: Jesus.
18:20
SPEAKER_03: Three times a day, they can use their breath weapon.
18:23
SPEAKER_03: We got some fun breath weapons, this one, uh, which is a cloud of heavy particles that, when exposed to water, undergo a chemical reaction.
18:31
SPEAKER_03: The resulting 15 by 60 foot cone-shaped like cloud is affected as though struck by a lightning bolt attack for 4 to 40 damage, most often used on the underside of ships to blast away the bottom and leave the fuck, man.
18:50
SPEAKER_03: So unfortunately, they uh unfortunately they couldn't do the the little like cap-sized ship thing because they just blow out the fucking cap.
18:56
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, they just fucking blow out the bottom of it.
18:59
SPEAKER_02: They're like, yeah, it'll just sink.
19:01
SPEAKER_02: I'll get to it here in a minute.
19:02
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
19:02
SPEAKER_03: Um, this breath weapon has no effect in the air.
19:05
SPEAKER_03: So they're kinda I mean, they like to, you know, raid ships and coastal communities and kill people and take their stones.
19:12
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
19:13
SPEAKER_03: Who doesn't?
19:14
SPEAKER_03: That's relatively evil.
19:16
SPEAKER_03: It just feels like the assignment of lawful to them was a little like they had to pick something.
19:22
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, just like spin the little three-part wheel and it landed on lawful instead of neutral or chaotic.
19:27
SPEAKER_03: So they're like, all right, lawful evil.
19:29
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I again there needs to be more like explanation as to why exactly the lawful part is there.
19:36
SPEAKER_03: I mean, apparently not.
19:38
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, just use your imagination, I guess.
19:41
SPEAKER_03: I guess.
19:42
SPEAKER_03: So next we're gonna talk about I mean, uh the well, we're gonna talk about the one that I have the most uh umbrage of these.
19:49
SPEAKER_03: Oh boy, of course we are.
19:51
SPEAKER_03: Well, okay, I have umbrage with considering them true dragons, but I take no umbrage with these creatures at large because they they fuck really hard.
20:00
SPEAKER_03: And that is the Ichthyodrake.
20:03
SPEAKER_04: What that sounds exciting.
20:04
SPEAKER_04: Is that what I think?
20:07
SPEAKER_03: I think you I think it is what you think it is.
20:09
SPEAKER_03: And this is also by Gregory Dettweiler.
20:12
SPEAKER_03: Thank you, Gregory.
20:12
SPEAKER_03: Thank you, Gregory.
20:13
SPEAKER_03: Um Ichthyodrakes are large, and by large I mean a hundred feet long.
20:19
SPEAKER_03: Deep green colored creatures resembling huge fish with dragon heads.
20:24
SPEAKER_03: They look like shark dragons.
20:26
SPEAKER_02: They're shark dragons.
20:28
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, well, they're a little bit less, like they don't have the triangular shape spin on the back so much like sharks, but they basically look like sharks with dragon faces.
20:39
SPEAKER_03: Right.
20:39
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, my image, the image in my head was just very large fish, so I mean, I'm not technically wrong.
20:45
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I mean, sharks are technically wrong.
20:47
SPEAKER_03: Very large fish.
20:48
SPEAKER_03: Um, they're regarded as one of the most fearsome marine predators, believe it or not.
20:53
SPEAKER_03: What?
20:53
SPEAKER_03: I don't know if you saw that one coming, and are, quote, apparently distant relatives of true dragons.
20:59
SPEAKER_03: I will say the wording in in both these individual articles and also in because there's a little section um in front basically talking about what I explained at the top of the episode about how, unless otherwise stated, that these variants share XYZ traits with true dragons.
21:19
SPEAKER_03: So it's not quite clear, like the wording is a little contradictory contradictory on whether or not these are meant to be considered true dragons or if they're just related.
21:29
SPEAKER_03: But anyway, they are apparently distant relatives of true dragons, which is why they mostly look like sharks.
21:36
SPEAKER_03: Um they share the same age category progression, sensory powers, sans infravision, they do not have infra vision, uh, fear aura, and saving throw bonuses with other dragons.
21:47
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
21:48
SPEAKER_03: However, Ichthyodrakes are much less intelligent.
21:52
SPEAKER_03: They have an animal intelligence, which is very unusual for anything dragon or dragon adjacent.
21:57
SPEAKER_03: It is.
21:58
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
21:59
SPEAKER_03: Um
22:00
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
22:00
SPEAKER_02: That's a s a step down.
22:03
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
22:04
SPEAKER_03: Um and therefore cannot speak or use magic.
22:07
SPEAKER_03: Um this lack of meaningful intelligence also makes it impossible to bribe or flatter them.
22:13
SPEAKER_03: They also, quote, never seem, end quote, to sleep.
22:19
SPEAKER_04: Uh, what the fuck does that mean?
22:21
SPEAKER_03: They don't they No, I think what it means is that how it looks like sharks don't sleep because they never stop swimming.
22:27
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
22:27
SPEAKER_03: I think that's what it's in reference to.
22:29
SPEAKER_03: So they don't sleep.
22:31
SPEAKER_03: Well, they shar sharks sleep, but they keep swimming.
22:34
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
22:35
SPEAKER_03: Because they would die if they didn't.
22:36
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
22:36
SPEAKER_03: So I think this is a similar situation.
22:38
SPEAKER_03: It doesn't say that they that this is the case, but my only thought was that it was kind of meant to be like a cheeky.
22:45
SPEAKER_04: But Lewin, as a s aspiring former marine biologist, would would pick up on that.
22:50
SPEAKER_04: Right.
22:50
SPEAKER_02: That was my thought, was that it was kind of a cheeky reference to real life sharks.
22:54
SPEAKER_02: Given that it's based off of like, you know, sharks.
22:57
SPEAKER_02: Sharks, that would also make sense.
22:59
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
23:00
SPEAKER_03: Um, ichthyodrakes are neutral in alignment, which I take no embrace with because they are angry animals.
23:07
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I mean, they just kind of do what's going on.
23:10
SPEAKER_04: They're the tiger sharks of Dungeons and Dragons.
23:13
SPEAKER_03: Except for the tiger sharks that I'm sure exist in Dungeons and Dragons.
23:17
SPEAKER_03: Okay, yeah.
23:17
SPEAKER_03: These are the tiger sharks of dragons.
23:20
SPEAKER_03: Of Dungeons and Dragons.
23:23
SPEAKER_03: Dragons.
23:24
SPEAKER_03: Dragons.
23:25
SPEAKER_03: Dragons.
23:25
SPEAKER_03: Dragon Dragons.
23:26
SPEAKER_03: Um, Ichtheodrakes are top tier, are the top tier marine predator, excuse me, um, using vibrations from their fins to attract predatory fish within a ten mile radius to them.
23:38
SPEAKER_03: Uh, so think sharks, barracudas, etc.
23:41
SPEAKER_03: Upon which the fish are attacked and eaten.
23:44
SPEAKER_03: Oh.
23:45
SPEAKER_03: So I think that they feel these vibrations and are like, oh hey, let's go check that out and probably eat it.
23:52
SPEAKER_03: And then it's an ichthyodrake, and it's like, call an ambulance.
23:57
SPEAKER_03: Not for me.
23:58
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, well, because there are several predatory fish in real life that if something is in distress, that's what they use to hunt because something's in distress and making all this noise and it's injured and easy prey.
24:12
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so the ichthyodrake essentially mimics that.
24:16
SPEAKER_03: And then it's like surprise bitch.
24:18
SPEAKER_03: Surprise bitch, and then you roll up and it's a hundred-foot-long fish dragon, and you're like, ooh.
24:22
SPEAKER_02: Also, uh, can I just say a hundred-foot-long fish dragon is like nightmare fuel.
24:29
SPEAKER_03: Don't you just love the ocean draws?
24:31
SPEAKER_02: No.
24:31
SPEAKER_02: The ocean can suck it.
24:34
SPEAKER_03: Uh oh, speaking of uh these things being terrifying, Ichthyodrakes are so large that they can swallow a normal-sized shark whole.
24:43
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
24:45
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
24:45
SPEAKER_03: Their jaws are literally that big.
24:47
SPEAKER_03: And after being swallowed, any prey takes two to twelve acid damage per round until digested.
24:53
SPEAKER_03: Um, digested characters cannot be revived by any method short of a w of a wish, but may leave behind any magic or metallic gear that managed to save versus acid.
25:03
SPEAKER_03: So your friend is dead, but there's a chance that his plate mail might still be okay.
25:08
SPEAKER_02: So, you know.
25:08
SPEAKER_02: So go for that.
25:10
SPEAKER_02: Shit's expensive.
25:11
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
25:12
SPEAKER_03: You're dead, but you can't take it with you.
25:14
SPEAKER_03: And uh sell it to Well, I was gonna say sell it to buy a diamond for Rubify, but it wouldn't work because he got digested.
25:22
SPEAKER_02: Damn.
25:24
SPEAKER_02: Nope, you would have to bribe someone with the wish spell.
25:26
SPEAKER_02: Yup.
25:27
SPEAKER_02: Or to cast a wish spell, not with it, because you would just be wasting it at that point.
25:32
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, allow me to bribe you with this wish spell to bring my friend back.
25:35
SPEAKER_04: Um fuck.
25:37
SPEAKER_02: With the wish spell.
25:40
SPEAKER_03: Sounds like something I would do.
25:42
SPEAKER_03: Like I would just I would not see the I would not see the forest for the tree.
25:47
SPEAKER_03: Uh, then I would realize what I'd done like right after.
25:51
SPEAKER_03: Fuck.
25:51
SPEAKER_03: Fuck!
25:52
SPEAKER_02: Like, well, alright guys, we have to try something else.
25:55
SPEAKER_02: This isn't gonna work.
25:55
SPEAKER_03: Bribe him again.
25:57
SPEAKER_03: And this is why I am never the face of the party.
26:01
SPEAKER_03: Um Ichthyodrakes do possess a breath weapon if everything else about them wasn't um already fuck you.
26:09
SPEAKER_02: Do I want to know what their breath weapon is, though?
26:12
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
26:12
SPEAKER_03: Um, for one, it is primarily used against more powerful foes such as entire ships or adventuring parties.
26:18
SPEAKER_03: It's not something they use really to hunt, because they can swallow a shark hole.
26:23
SPEAKER_03: They don't really need to.
26:24
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they're not worried about it.
26:25
SPEAKER_02: They don't need a breath weapon to hunt.
26:27
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
26:27
SPEAKER_03: Don't worry about it.
26:28
SPEAKER_03: Don't worry about it.
26:30
SPEAKER_03: Um, this is a sonic blast that manifests as a 20-foot long by 80-foot wide cone.
26:35
SPEAKER_03: Uh, any creature within this AoE takes four to forty points of damage, and all non-living objects must save versus a crushing blow.
26:44
SPEAKER_03: Um, I'm assuming that otherwise they're destroyed.
26:46
SPEAKER_03: Whoa.
26:47
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
26:48
SPEAKER_02: Um I mean, that's that's pretty bad.
26:51
SPEAKER_04: Hey Lou, and I've got one for you.
26:52
SPEAKER_04: You may not have heard heard of this one before.
26:55
SPEAKER_04: I do not like this.
26:57
SPEAKER_03: Um, honestly, this whole is very um very subnautica vibes.
27:02
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
27:03
SPEAKER_03: It is.
27:03
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it makes me think of another frightening thing here.
27:06
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it makes me think, I mean, not quite, because it's I mean, it's realistically very different, but kind of makes me think of the uh the Reaper Leviathan.
27:14
SPEAKER_04: Oh, well, that's spoilers for Travis.
27:16
SPEAKER_03: Oh, well.
27:17
SPEAKER_03: But yes.
27:19
SPEAKER_03: Honestly, you know what?
27:20
SPEAKER_03: I wouldn't have even thought that because I thought that no force in this world would get Travis to play Subnautica.
27:29
SPEAKER_02: I have actually played it before.
27:31
SPEAKER_03: Given how you how much you don't like the ocean.
27:34
SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah, no, don't get me wrong.
27:36
SPEAKER_02: Playing that game is terrifying, but it's also a very good game.
27:41
SPEAKER_03: I mean, yeah, it's a very good game.
27:42
SPEAKER_03: It's a beautiful game, but I just feel like it's something that you would not have ever wanted to touch with a 10-foot pole.
27:49
SPEAKER_03: Well, spoiler there's also no Ichthyodrakes in there, unfortunately.
27:52
SPEAKER_03: Well, that's a good thing.
27:53
SPEAKER_03: Uh yeah, they would have had some issues with copyright.
27:56
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, probably.
27:58
SPEAKER_03: So the Ichtheodrake is described as having, quote, no no natural enemies, end quote, um, sans like extraneous fact, like adventuring parties, for example.
28:09
SPEAKER_03: Um and this makes me hope that they do not reproduce too quickly or in very large numbers, because the article provides no information about the reproductive habits.
28:19
SPEAKER_03: Um which is probably good because they would have had to skirt around talking about shark penises.
28:25
SPEAKER_02: So Which I'm gonna assume is probably a fairly dodgy subject.
28:30
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
28:31
SPEAKER_03: Um, shark penises are extant.
28:36
SPEAKER_03: They are certainly extant.
28:38
SPEAKER_03: And uh I mean, I'm not the person to explain about them because I don't think I have a good clasp on the situation, but I have no clasp on the situation, but I don't want to know.
28:49
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, you really don't.
28:51
SPEAKER_02: So thanks.
28:52
SPEAKER_03: So uh I think with that, uh we're gonna take a break.
28:58
SPEAKER_04: So that uh you can explain the clasps clasp situation to Travis, yeah.
29:05
SPEAKER_04: Don't don't look it up.
29:07
SPEAKER_02: I'm you know what I'm not going to.
29:09
SPEAKER_02: I'm just not.
29:10
SPEAKER_04: Well, that was more for the audience.
29:12
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, if you don't already know, you probably don't want to know.
29:14
SPEAKER_03: Just thank us for yeah.
29:16
SPEAKER_03: Thank us later.
29:18
SPEAKER_03: Hey everybody, thank you for checking out our episode on the dragons of the dragons bestiary of Dragon Magazine.
29:26
SPEAKER_03: Dragons, dragons, dragons, dragons.
29:28
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, last dragon episode we had dragon dragons, and now we have dragon dragon dragons.
29:33
SPEAKER_02: And so many dragons.
29:35
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29:40
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29:51
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29:52
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29:56
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29:58
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29:59
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30:01
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30:08
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30:09
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30:09
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30:12
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30:21
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30:24
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30:25
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30:28
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30:29
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30:30
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30:33
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30:36
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30:38
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30:42
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30:44
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30:45
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30:47
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30:52
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30:52
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31:00
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31:07
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31:13
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31:22
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31:25
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31:27
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31:29
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31:43
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31:43
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31:44
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31:44
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31:46
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32:05
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32:30
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32:32
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32:37
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32:38
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32:47
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32:48
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33:00
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33:12
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33:14
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33:20
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33:27
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33:30
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33:32
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33:33
SPEAKER_04: It's you sound like you're proselytizing.
33:36
SPEAKER_04: Okay, listen, I I'm trying to be cute and funny, and it's not working per usual.
33:42
SPEAKER_03: Taylor tries to be cute and funny, accidentally starts a cult.
33:45
SPEAKER_03: Wouldn't be the first time today.
33:47
SPEAKER_03: The cult of the dragon dragon.
33:49
SPEAKER_03: Dragons.
33:49
SPEAKER_03: Dragon.
33:50
SPEAKER_02: Dragon Dragon Dragons.
33:51
SPEAKER_03: Because the cult of the dragons are already taken, so we can't use it.
33:54
SPEAKER_04: Anyway, this is a mess.
33:54
SPEAKER_04: Run it down.
33:56
SPEAKER_02: Uh, and as always, a very big thank you to Alexander Nakarata for our theme song, The Blacksmith.
34:03
SPEAKER_02: Always nice and fun.
34:04
SPEAKER_04: And with that, let's kill this outbreak and just go back to it.
34:08
SPEAKER_02: Yes, let's do that.
34:11
SPEAKER_03: So, um, this next type may or well, I was gonna say it may or may not sound familiar.
34:18
SPEAKER_03: Um, not the name of it, but the concept.
34:21
SPEAKER_03: Uh so next we're gonna be talking about astral dragons.
34:24
SPEAKER_04: Oh yeah.
34:25
SPEAKER_03: And this was this uh section was also written by Gregory Detweiler.
34:29
SPEAKER_03: He's just on a roll.
34:31
SPEAKER_02: He is on a roll with all of these.
34:34
SPEAKER_03: So um astral dragons per this article are different from the battle dragons and pack dragons that were in essence.
34:43
SPEAKER_03: The astral dragons, as discussed in the planar dragons episode.
34:49
SPEAKER_03: Jesus Christ.
34:51
SPEAKER_03: That was a sentence in a lot of of of adjectives and descriptors and self-referential.
35:00
SPEAKER_03: Also, fair warning: this is not gonna be the last time I tell you go listen to this other episode that I did about dragons in this episode.
35:09
SPEAKER_04: This is the ruin self- advertised.
35:13
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, this is just the the tangled web I weave.
35:17
SPEAKER_03: The self-titled album of dragon content.
35:20
SPEAKER_03: So, um, part of this article, Astral Dragons are silver-colored dragons that resemble eastern lungs in that they have long, which is 80 feet long, serpentine bodies with no wings and a special organ in their heads that allow them to fly.
35:35
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
35:36
SPEAKER_03: Um, so it's not quite I mean, and there were some um images given, but they were black and white, and depending on the image, they were kind of those that were like I don't mean to be rude, but sometimes it's kind of hard to tell exactly what's going on, you know?
35:50
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's got that like kind of real thick line work that kind of makes it hard to tell what's going on.
35:56
SPEAKER_03: So it's not they don't necessarily have that like forehead pearl, but like they could.
36:02
SPEAKER_03: We're not sure.
36:03
SPEAKER_03: We're not sure.
36:04
SPEAKER_03: They could.
36:04
SPEAKER_03: I'm just saying, I feel like as a DM, you could make that call and give them that pearl and it'd be fine.
36:10
SPEAKER_03: However, uh, they are clumsy when walking on surfaces affected by gravity because the astral plane doesn't have gravity.
36:16
SPEAKER_02: Right, they're used to no gravity and just flying around.
36:21
SPEAKER_02: And when you introduce them to some gravity, they are just screwed.
36:25
SPEAKER_03: Whoop, there goes gravity.
36:26
SPEAKER_03: Also, just distinguishing them from the aforementioned types of dragons is the fact that they are natives of the astral plane, because this was discussed in the planar dragons episode.
36:36
SPEAKER_03: You can finish this one before you go listen to that one.
36:39
SPEAKER_03: I won't be mad at you.
36:40
SPEAKER_03: Um, well, that's not really full mat.
36:42
SPEAKER_03: I won't be mad at you even if you don't go listen to that one.
36:44
SPEAKER_03: Anyway, um, as discussed in the Planar Dragons episode, um, planar dragons are dragons that are not from the uh, you know, the astral plane, the elemental chaos, whatever.
36:56
SPEAKER_03: They're dragons that have been transformed by the magical energies from their time there.
37:02
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they're not actually native to Exactly, which these astral dragons are.
37:07
SPEAKER_03: Um they can traverse the planes as though using the plane shift ability uh at a speed of one plane per round.
37:15
SPEAKER_03: Jesus What the fuck?
37:18
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they literally just blink and they're in another plane.
37:25
SPEAKER_03: Which is insane.
37:27
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
37:28
SPEAKER_02: Like they can just every six seconds, they can just poof into a new plane.
37:33
SPEAKER_03: Um, their coloring is also similar to the kind of silvery blur uh of the astral plane itself, which enhances their ability to blend in, and their vision can see through this aforementioned blur for up to 10 miles, which makes it impossible to surprise them.
37:50
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
37:51
SPEAKER_02: No shit.
37:52
SPEAKER_02: I mean, they can see for 10 fucking miles.
37:54
SPEAKER_03: Yep.
37:55
SPEAKER_03: Uh they seem mainly need little food, but like to gorge themselves when presented with the opportunity, and this is usually on an unfortunate Gith Yankee war party.
38:04
SPEAKER_01: Oh.
38:05
SPEAKER_03: Since we're in the astral plan, the Gith Yankee.
38:07
SPEAKER_02: Is it really unfortunate from what we learned of the Gith Yankee though?
38:11
SPEAKER_03: No.
38:11
SPEAKER_02: I mean like really, it's probably just kind of helping at that point.
38:15
SPEAKER_03: Karma.
38:18
SPEAKER_04: I'm just saying.
38:19
SPEAKER_02: The Gith Yankee are not nice people.
38:21
SPEAKER_03: I just I think I I want as uh I'm pretty sure I say this multiple times in the Gith Yankee episode.
38:27
SPEAKER_03: I want them to be nice people.
38:29
SPEAKER_03: I want to like the Gith Yankee because I like them.
38:31
SPEAKER_04: Um I want to like them because I like them.
38:33
SPEAKER_04: Hey, you know what I mean.
38:35
SPEAKER_03: I do, I do.
38:35
SPEAKER_02: You people who like villains and shit in the EO, you know what I mean.
38:39
SPEAKER_02: You can like them all you want.
38:40
SPEAKER_02: I'm just saying, for uh the other side of that, it is not an unfortunate thing.
38:45
SPEAKER_03: Well, it's unfortunate for them.
38:46
SPEAKER_03: From their perspective.
38:47
SPEAKER_03: For sure.
38:48
SPEAKER_03: From their perspective, it's very unfortunate.
38:49
SPEAKER_02: It's definitely unfortunate because yeah, food.
38:53
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, food.
38:54
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, whatever.
38:55
SPEAKER_03: Um, Astral Dragons are neutral in alignment.
38:58
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
38:58
SPEAKER_02: I mean, yeah, I guess that can make sense.
39:01
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it kind of fits.
39:03
SPEAKER_02: They don't really seem to have any like specific agenda.
39:05
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
39:06
SPEAKER_03: I think it's just it fits their kind of vibe a lot better than like other dragons.
39:12
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
39:13
SPEAKER_03: Well, I was gonna say it fits their almost aloof, like almost above it all vibe, and then I realized I was describing a lawful good paladins.
39:20
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
39:22
SPEAKER_03: I don't know why I felt the need to bring the paladin and we all did.
39:25
SPEAKER_02: I don't know how you feel about paladins.
39:27
SPEAKER_03: I mean, we all know how I feel about most lawful good people in general.
39:31
SPEAKER_03: Um, sorry, Mohammed.
39:33
SPEAKER_03: So uh female astral dragons lay one egg every few hundred years.
39:39
SPEAKER_03: Uh initially the egg is five feet in diameter, but as the female carries it with her for many more years, which I just realized in my brain harkens back to the um myths about lung dragons carrying around pearls that held their souls.
39:53
SPEAKER_03: It's very visually similar to that.
39:56
SPEAKER_03: Um, it swells to ten feet in diameter.
39:58
SPEAKER_03: Um after this, eventually a hole opens at one end from which the infant dragon emerges.
40:04
SPEAKER_03: Yes, it was described precisely that way as opposed to the dragon forcing its way out.
40:10
SPEAKER_03: So I don't really know what's going on.
40:12
SPEAKER_03: Honestly, I don't know what's going on with this egg.
40:14
SPEAKER_02: We'll we'll come to see why.
40:16
SPEAKER_02: They reproduce very irregularly.
40:20
SPEAKER_02: Irregularly.
40:21
SPEAKER_02: There we go.
40:21
SPEAKER_02: That's the word.
40:22
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
40:22
SPEAKER_03: And it also, unfortunately, does not talk about how they fuck.
40:25
SPEAKER_03: So I don't know if this is just Are they just like a sexual reproduction here?
40:30
SPEAKER_02: Just they produce an egg.
40:32
SPEAKER_03: Given the fact that they don't know.
40:39
SPEAKER_03: I mean, I feel like if they would if they were to were going with that angle, they would have mentioned it, or maybe just not felt the need to specify female.
40:48
SPEAKER_03: But I could be wrong.
40:49
SPEAKER_04: It wouldn't be the first time an asexual, um like any sexual fiction fictional race, particularly in Dungeons and Dragons, was given gender like that was necessary.
41:02
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
41:02
SPEAKER_01: Hmm.
41:03
SPEAKER_03: Or maybe they're all female.
41:05
SPEAKER_03: Or maybe I'm mixing it up with a later entry on this issue on this uh issue.
41:09
SPEAKER_03: Um, so the leftover shell of their egg um then eventually becomes the dragon's layer.
41:17
SPEAKER_04: What?
41:18
SPEAKER_04: Oh yeah, I've heard about this.
41:21
SPEAKER_03: So the outside of the egg, um, similarly to the dragon themselves, is the same silvery color as astral space, therefore making it virtually invisible unless one is within 30 feet of it, or looking directly into the darkened open end that the dragon emerged from.
41:38
SPEAKER_02: Yo.
41:39
SPEAKER_03: So as the dragon grows, the egg does as well.
41:42
SPEAKER_03: Um, it's noted that how it does this is unknown.
41:46
SPEAKER_03: Which actually, now that I think more and more about this, this really does remind me of the soul pearl thing.
41:52
SPEAKER_03: Um the egg maxes out at about 30 feet in diameter.
41:56
SPEAKER_03: Uh young astral dragons use their eggs as treasure hordes uh and maintain, yeah.
42:02
SPEAKER_03: They literally just yeah, bring treasure and put it back in their egg.
42:06
SPEAKER_03: Um, and maintain a mental link with their eggs.
42:09
SPEAKER_03: Uh they can always find their way back to them even when on another plane.
42:12
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, this reminds me of the lung dragon soul prol thing.
42:15
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
42:16
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
42:17
SPEAKER_02: It does, but still really fucking cool though.
42:20
SPEAKER_03: Right.
42:20
SPEAKER_03: Um, so young astral dragons typically spend most of their time on the primaterial plane, similar to the Githianki, uh, where time passes more quickly, and older astral dragons tend to spend more of their time on the astral plane.
42:33
SPEAKER_03: Uh, whenever an astral dragon enters adulthood, it leaves its egg for a larger layer, uh, typically an abandoned dwelling of another race, aka usually the Githyanki.
42:43
SPEAKER_03: Um, because like I said, these guys uh top out at about 80 feet long.
42:48
SPEAKER_03: So eventually a 30-foot diameter egg is not gonna be ancient astral dragons rarely leave the astral plane and have no limit to their natural lifespan besides outside forces or illness.
43:04
SPEAKER_02: Oh.
43:04
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
43:05
SPEAKER_04: So effectively immortal.
43:07
SPEAKER_02: Effectively immortal.
43:08
SPEAKER_04: Yes.
43:09
SPEAKER_02: Interesting.
43:10
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
43:11
SPEAKER_02: I I like that.
43:12
SPEAKER_03: Uh they keep resplendent hordes and travel the plains in order to fill them, and they have a particular penchant for the ornate armor and weapons of the Githyanki.
43:21
SPEAKER_03: I think these guys just like to pick on the Githiankies.
43:24
SPEAKER_03: I think they do.
43:25
SPEAKER_03: Which I mean, fair.
43:26
SPEAKER_02: Like that I'm sure there are plenty of other residents in the astral plane, but they're just like going for the Githonki here.
43:33
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and they also, um, another favorite kind of target of theirs is like things brought into the astral plane by travelers.
43:42
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
43:43
SPEAKER_03: That sort of thing.
43:44
SPEAKER_03: Uh their hordes also usually contain more magic items than any other type of dragon.
43:49
SPEAKER_03: Um, they have a particular fondness for magic items, though some of these items may not seem magical until used on the prime.
43:56
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
43:57
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
43:58
SPEAKER_02: I guess in comparison.
44:00
SPEAKER_02: To the astral plane.
44:01
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
44:02
SPEAKER_03: I mean, I would imagine that there is something like it there would probably be a magical item that it's like, oh, within a 50 diameter foot bubble, there's no gravity on the astral plane.
44:12
SPEAKER_03: It's like, okay.
44:14
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
44:14
SPEAKER_02: Cool.
44:15
SPEAKER_03: So, um, this is gonna be a little off the cup because I actually forgot the part in the curtain a little bit.
44:21
SPEAKER_03: I took a break at this part when I was writing these, and I forgot about this bit, and I just moved on to the next type of dragon.
44:29
SPEAKER_03: So um this is coming straight from the source.
44:32
SPEAKER_03: Straight from the source.
44:33
SPEAKER_02: Straight from the source.
44:35
SPEAKER_03: So um I mentioned their effective immortality.
44:38
SPEAKER_03: Um, an exemption to that is illness.
44:41
SPEAKER_03: Uh astral dragons are subject to a strange and they say rare uh disease called astrolamitis.
44:51
SPEAKER_03: Astrolamitis.
44:53
SPEAKER_03: Whichis means inflammation.
44:57
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
44:58
SPEAKER_03: So Astroplane.
44:59
SPEAKER_03: Inflammation of the astral plane?
45:04
SPEAKER_03: Inflammation of the astrolom.
45:07
SPEAKER_03: That's the thing in their I don't know.
45:10
SPEAKER_03: Um and this uh eliminates the dragon's ability to plane shift.
45:16
SPEAKER_03: Um, which they say it's rare.
45:19
SPEAKER_03: This ailment has a 1% chance per use of plane shift of affecting the dragon when it reaches any plane other than the astral plane.
45:27
SPEAKER_04: That doesn't sound rare.
45:28
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, that's not especially given that they can do it every six seconds.
45:33
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that really doesn't sound rare.
45:35
SPEAKER_02: Like I realize, yeah, it's one percent chance, but like you said, they can do it every six seconds.
45:41
SPEAKER_04: Rare, a serious side effect.
45:42
SPEAKER_03: Bitch, no.
45:44
SPEAKER_03: If they just keep repeatedly blinking for like an hour, chances are good they're gonna get this.
45:50
SPEAKER_03: So, you know.
45:53
SPEAKER_03: Also, I know the word blink is not what this technically is, but you know what I mean.
45:57
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
46:01
SPEAKER_03: So it's not that rare.
46:02
SPEAKER_03: Like in in my humble opinion.
46:05
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and maybe a like a one in, I don't know, 8,192 chance would be rare, but whatever.
46:12
SPEAKER_03: Uh once the dragon discovers that it is permanently separated from its home plane, um, it goes insane.
46:20
SPEAKER_03: Uh savagely attacking any anything around it, which like you don't say no of no like Yeah.
46:29
SPEAKER_04: I I I don't blame them.
46:31
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
46:32
SPEAKER_02: They can't get back to their home, so I would be a little upset.
46:36
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, right.
46:37
SPEAKER_03: So in this frenzied state, the dragon cannot uh cast spells, but it can still use its breath weapon, um, and all of its physical attacks do double damage.
46:48
SPEAKER_03: It says uh because of the quote strength of its madness, which is pretty fucking metal.
46:56
SPEAKER_03: Um just a metal verbiage there.
46:59
SPEAKER_03: Um the dragon fights unceasingly for two to five days without rest, then collapses and dies within one to four hours.
47:07
SPEAKER_03: What the fuck?
47:08
SPEAKER_03: Jesus Christ.
47:10
SPEAKER_03: Which I would imagine at what point is that does that have anything I don't think at that point that has anything to do with the illness.
47:17
SPEAKER_03: I think it's just from exertion.
47:19
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
47:20
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I mean, especially if you're fighting like non-stop.
47:23
SPEAKER_03: If you're just constantly blasting your breath weapon and you know Yeah, I mean you're gonna get exhausted and then you're just gonna die.
47:31
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
47:32
SPEAKER_03: Uh it says no known cure exists for this disease except for a wish spell.
47:36
SPEAKER_03: Uh and if the dragon is transported back to the astral plane via some other method, like someone teleports it there or it finds uh like a physical portal or something like that, the illness and the like side effect of the madness subside, but it will never be able to travel to another plane again.
47:59
SPEAKER_03: So I think I would still pick that one over the, you know dying from exertion and after going on a fucking rage mad rampage for two to five days.
48:09
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, I would I would take being stuck in the astral plane to not go through that.
48:14
SPEAKER_02: Thanks.
48:15
SPEAKER_03: Right.
48:16
SPEAKER_03: Also, like one pr uh that's not even That ain't rare.
48:20
SPEAKER_03: Per per use of plane shift, that's not rare.
48:24
SPEAKER_02: No, maybe like gotta question their use of the phrasing here.
48:30
SPEAKER_03: I feel like that's the kind of thing that I wouldn't have even assigned a number to.
48:35
SPEAKER_03: Because I feel like that would be the kind of thing that would probably be such a big deal that it would have to be up to DM discretion.
48:43
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
48:43
SPEAKER_03: As opposed to just like there happens to be an Astral Dragon and every six seconds you're just rolling a percentile die to see if it gets sick and ends up somewhere else.
48:53
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, no, no.
48:55
SPEAKER_02: Just just no.
48:57
SPEAKER_03: No.
48:57
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
48:58
SPEAKER_02: That's just too much, man.
48:59
SPEAKER_03: Right.
49:00
SPEAKER_03: That's that's excessive.
49:03
SPEAKER_03: So, um, back to happier things about these, I guess.
49:09
SPEAKER_03: Um, astral dragons are amongst the most powerful of all draconic spellcasters.
49:13
SPEAKER_03: So an ancient astral dragon, which they become ancient at 401 years old, uh, is equivalent to an eighth-level magic user.
49:21
SPEAKER_03: And for every 200 years after that, they gain another level of ability.
49:25
SPEAKER_03: Because, like I said, they are functionally immortal unless they get astralomitis and still want to know why it's called that.
49:34
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, like what what part of the thing is the astrolom, it's it's what they use to plane shift and it's in their butt.
49:45
SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
49:47
SPEAKER_03: That would honestly that would be my best guess is that it's whatever specialized organ allows them to plane shift the way they do, gets inflamed from bursts.
49:56
SPEAKER_03: I don't know, using it too much.
49:58
SPEAKER_02: I don't fucking know.
50:00
SPEAKER_02: I mean, sure, it's kind of like your appendix.
50:04
SPEAKER_02: I mean, I don't use my appendix to plane shift.
50:07
SPEAKER_02: Maybe that's what our appendixes are for.
50:10
SPEAKER_02: And no one has just figured out how to actually activate it.
50:12
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
50:13
SPEAKER_02: We solved that.
50:14
SPEAKER_03: You did you did it.
50:15
SPEAKER_03: I did it.
50:15
SPEAKER_03: I cracked the code, guys.
50:17
SPEAKER_02: We solved the mystery.
50:18
SPEAKER_03: I figured it out.
50:20
SPEAKER_03: Oh.
50:21
SPEAKER_02: That was a good show.
50:22
SPEAKER_02: Sorry.
50:23
SPEAKER_03: What?
50:24
SPEAKER_03: What?
50:25
SPEAKER_02: Figure it out?
50:27
SPEAKER_03: Oh, I remember that show.
50:29
SPEAKER_03: I was like, wait.
50:30
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
50:31
SPEAKER_03: The only one that knows this?
50:32
SPEAKER_03: No, I know the show.
50:33
SPEAKER_03: I just forgot the title.
50:34
SPEAKER_03: Thank God.
50:35
SPEAKER_03: Wouldn't be the first time that I haven't known.
50:39
SPEAKER_03: What the fuck you were talking about?
50:40
SPEAKER_03: Well, for one, what the fuck Travis was talking about.
50:43
SPEAKER_03: But also just like a piece of quintessential pop culture that I didn't know about.
50:49
SPEAKER_02: I don't I honestly don't even know if you can consider that pop culture at this point, though.
50:53
SPEAKER_03: Oh, you know what I mean though.
50:54
SPEAKER_03: Like some kind of media thing.
50:56
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
50:56
SPEAKER_03: Anyway, their uh claws and like hands are dexterous enough to be able to open scrolls and spell books, which they use to vary their repertoire of spells, so and they also don't live in the ocean, so it's not gonna ruin their books, like the aquatic dragons.
51:12
SPEAKER_02: Which, you know, that's good.
51:13
SPEAKER_02: Always a plus.
51:14
SPEAKER_03: Um piling on more to their these these guys are just a big middle finger to the Githianki.
51:20
SPEAKER_03: Uh they can sense psionics within 240 feet of them.
51:25
SPEAKER_03: And while they cannot use psionics nor are they immune, they have a plus six to save against psionic blast.
51:33
SPEAKER_02: They really are just the biggest middle finger to the Githianke ever.
51:38
SPEAKER_03: Beautiful.
51:39
SPEAKER_03: I love it.
51:40
SPEAKER_02: It's it's amazing.
51:41
SPEAKER_03: So they're also a big middle finger to astral travelers.
51:44
SPEAKER_02: Um, yeah.
51:46
SPEAKER_03: Well, okay.
51:47
SPEAKER_03: First let's talk about the breath weapon.
51:49
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
51:49
SPEAKER_03: Um, their breath weapon is a 180-foot long and ten-foot wide cylinder of force that affects anything caught within as though they've been hit by a feeble mind spell.
52:01
SPEAKER_02: 180 foot long?
52:04
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
52:05
SPEAKER_02: What the shit?
52:07
SPEAKER_03: Why?
52:07
SPEAKER_03: Why the shit?
52:09
SPEAKER_03: Also that.
52:10
SPEAKER_03: I mean, I feel like if you're in the astral plane, you're probably like Okay.
52:16
SPEAKER_03: I mean, not okay.
52:18
SPEAKER_03: I don't think a an a level three party is gonna run a foul of one of these things and just get fucking destroyed.
52:25
SPEAKER_03: You know what I mean?
52:26
SPEAKER_03: Probably not.
52:27
SPEAKER_03: But unless your DM hates you.
52:29
SPEAKER_03: To be fair, under the right circumstances, like a level 20 plus party could run a foul of one of these things and get fucked up.
52:35
SPEAKER_02: So yeah.
52:36
SPEAKER_03: You know.
52:37
SPEAKER_03: Um, additionally, uh movement on the astral plane is based on intelligence, and therefore creatures affected by this cannot move more than 30 feet per round.
52:49
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
52:50
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
52:51
SPEAKER_03: So, you know, it's they essentially their breath weapon is essentially a beam of stupid.
52:56
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it just it stupefies you and or stupidifies something.
53:01
SPEAKER_04: No, I I like stupefied too.
53:03
SPEAKER_03: I mean, yeah.
53:05
SPEAKER_03: It probably that probably It's a side effect.
53:08
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you probably feel that way if you get hit by a feeble mind spell.
53:11
SPEAKER_03: Stupefied.
53:12
SPEAKER_02: Stupefied.
53:13
SPEAKER_03: Just also fuck you.
53:17
SPEAKER_03: Is that they can use their breath weapons six times a day.
53:20
SPEAKER_03: What the fuck?
53:21
SPEAKER_03: A lot of varieties can only use it three times, as I've mentioned also several times.
53:25
SPEAKER_03: But I feel like three times a day is pretty par for the course, especially for um like breath weapons in older editions.
53:32
SPEAKER_04: Okay, fair.
53:33
SPEAKER_03: But like also So, well, no, that's what I'm saying is pre is so common that it's like, oh, this guy's gonna use it six times.
53:40
SPEAKER_02: Fuck you.
53:40
SPEAKER_02: Just my god, man.
53:43
SPEAKER_04: This really is just the biggest fuck you.
53:47
SPEAKER_04: So Yep.
53:51
SPEAKER_03: Perhaps even worse than their breath weapon is their bite, believe it or not.
53:55
SPEAKER_03: Um, it's worse than their breath, their bite.
53:59
SPEAKER_02: I am curious as to why that is the case.
54:01
SPEAKER_03: Um upon a hit, uh, their bite attack has a 20% chance to sever the target's silver cord.
54:08
SPEAKER_03: Oh.
54:09
SPEAKER_03: As if struck by a uh Githianki's silver sword.
54:13
SPEAKER_01: Oh.
54:14
SPEAKER_03: Um, individual astral travelers are usually killed in this way as they are separated from their group.
54:19
SPEAKER_03: However, if the spellcaster who transported the group to the astral plane is struck and killed in this way, the entire party will die.
54:30
SPEAKER_03: Oh.
54:33
SPEAKER_03: Um Yeah.
54:34
SPEAKER_03: Um, this ability uh or this uh trait of their bite attack, uh, coupled with their ability to send psionic powers, means that Astral Dragons will always go after magic users or psionicists first.
54:50
SPEAKER_04: I mean, it makes sense.
54:52
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
54:52
SPEAKER_04: I don't like it, but it it does make sense.
54:55
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
54:56
SPEAKER_03: These guys are these guys are just a huge middle finger to everybody else in the astral plane.
55:02
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I'm just going to assume that everyone in the astral plane just stays like As far away from as possible.
55:09
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
55:09
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
55:10
SPEAKER_03: Uh uh, don't forget, they have like partial camouflage too.
55:13
SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah.
55:14
SPEAKER_02: I actually did forget about that.
55:17
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, these guys are a Can you please tell me the their alignment so I know how scared I need to be?
55:23
SPEAKER_04: Oh okay, yeah.
55:24
SPEAKER_04: You told me that already, didn't you?
55:26
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
55:27
SPEAKER_04: But it's okay.
55:28
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I I got mind-flooded by finding out about these monstrous.
55:34
SPEAKER_04: Yes, I was stupid.
55:35
SPEAKER_04: Stupefied, wouldn't you say?
55:38
SPEAKER_02: You get mind-blasted and then become stupefied, and then they kill you.
55:42
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, by eating your eating your friend, your wizard friend.
55:47
SPEAKER_02: Oh god.
55:49
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
55:50
SPEAKER_03: I mean, to be fair, like being neutral on the one hand, like, they're not evil, but also like they don't give a shit.
55:58
SPEAKER_03: They, you know, I would imagine that they could be cap they could be capricious enough to just be like I don't like you.
56:04
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I don't like your face.
56:06
SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna eat your wizard friend, and then you'll you'll all die.
56:09
SPEAKER_02: Unless you are the wizard friend, and then it's just I'm gonna eat you.
56:12
SPEAKER_02: Yep.
56:13
SPEAKER_04: So the moral of the story is Don't go to just honestly, just don't go to the astral plane.
56:17
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, just that's the moral of like five of our episodes.
56:21
SPEAKER_03: Is just don't go to the astral plane.
56:22
SPEAKER_02: Just don't go to the astral plane.
56:23
SPEAKER_02: That's the best bet, really.
56:25
SPEAKER_02: Like.
56:26
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
56:27
SPEAKER_02: It it's just there to fuck you.
56:28
SPEAKER_02: That's it.
56:29
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
56:29
SPEAKER_03: It just is just depends on how it's going to fuck you.
56:33
SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
56:34
SPEAKER_03: So, uh next, uh, this next uh section was actually not written by Mr.
56:39
SPEAKER_03: Detweiler.
56:40
SPEAKER_03: It was written by Mr.
56:41
SPEAKER_03: Greenwood.
56:42
SPEAKER_04: One more Mr.
56:45
SPEAKER_04: Greenwood.
56:46
SPEAKER_03: Uh were dragons is what's up.
56:48
SPEAKER_02: Weerdragons?
56:49
SPEAKER_04: Where I'm sorry.
56:51
SPEAKER_02: What?
56:52
SPEAKER_02: Like, I I repeated it, and then I repeated it again, and then my mind was like, wait.
56:58
SPEAKER_04: Wait.
56:58
SPEAKER_04: Is this what I think it is?
57:01
SPEAKER_02: Probably not.
57:02
SPEAKER_02: So, oh, okay.
57:04
SPEAKER_03: Okay, let me explain.
57:06
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
57:06
SPEAKER_03: Uh, were dragons are dragons that in draconic form uh resemble wingless copper dragons, uh albeit more slim and iridescent, kind of like an iridescent silvery blue color, um, and they range anywhere from 12 to 36 feet long.
57:22
SPEAKER_03: And also, uh, they fly, they can fly, with aforementioned mysterious head organ pearl, I've decided.
57:31
SPEAKER_03: However, they have the ability to take the form of a human female whenever they desire.
57:37
SPEAKER_03: Life goals.
57:41
SPEAKER_03: Like, I was literally reading this and I was like, I want this to be me.
57:45
SPEAKER_03: Not to part the curtain too much for things I'm about to talk about, but I literally was reading this and I was like, this is my OC, do not steal.
57:54
SPEAKER_03: Life goals or wife goals?
57:55
SPEAKER_03: Life goals or wife goals, honestly.
57:57
SPEAKER_02: So I mean, it's not unusual for a dragon to have some sort of shape-shifting ability, but it's a little unusual to be specific to a female human.
58:11
SPEAKER_03: So their human their human form appears as that of a uh human female of about 20 years of age, uh, and this is regardless of how uh old the dragon is.
58:24
SPEAKER_03: Uh, with a comeliness score of at least 18! Uh, we've mentioned comeliness again.
58:31
SPEAKER_02: Whoa, oh go ahead and just explain the comliness again.
58:37
SPEAKER_03: It's just a score of how hot you are.
58:39
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
58:39
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
58:40
SPEAKER_03: So And it's based partially, I think it's it's based partially on charisma.
58:45
SPEAKER_03: I don't know.
58:46
SPEAKER_03: I don't remember.
58:46
SPEAKER_03: It's been a while.
58:47
SPEAKER_03: I think I talked about comeliness in the OA episode, actually.
58:50
SPEAKER_03: You did, yeah.
58:51
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
58:51
SPEAKER_03: So they're all they're they're all hot.
58:54
SPEAKER_02: They are like they're all hot women.
58:57
SPEAKER_02: Super hot women.
58:58
SPEAKER_02: That is also a dragon.
59:00
SPEAKER_03: That is also a dragon.
59:01
SPEAKER_03: Is there a Lewin opened the chat room?
59:06
SPEAKER_03: Lewin started the chat.
59:07
SPEAKER_02: Lewin started the chat.
59:09
SPEAKER_03: I was literally reading this like, this can't be real.
59:11
SPEAKER_03: This is like Ed Greenwood laser targeting me.
59:15
SPEAKER_03: Yes, yes, it is.
59:17
SPEAKER_03: So, um they are fertile in both human and draconic form.
59:22
SPEAKER_04: Oh boy.
59:23
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
59:24
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, also the word fertile specifically was used.
59:26
SPEAKER_02: Now we're now we're getting weird.
59:28
SPEAKER_03: Now, now we're getting weird.
59:30
SPEAKER_03: No, it's not weird.
59:30
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
59:31
SPEAKER_03: And always produce otherware dragons regardless of whether the father was a human or dragon.
59:36
SPEAKER_03: So the the the thing about this is these are essentially draconic Asari.
59:40
SPEAKER_03: Um they're described specifically in the I didn't write this down in my notes, but they are described as all female.
59:49
SPEAKER_03: So it's not just a subset of dragons that can only take a female humanoid form for whatever reason.
59:55
SPEAKER_03: Well, human.
59:56
SPEAKER_03: Um, the specific word human was used.
59:59
SPEAKER_03: I don't know if that's just maybe in place of humanoid or if it's specifically like human.
1:00:05
SPEAKER_02: I mean, I want to say, even at this point, they did have the distinction between human and humanoid.
1:00:10
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I feel like they did have that pretty uh nailed.
1:00:15
SPEAKER_04: Probably a um pretty intentional word choice.
1:00:17
SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
1:00:18
SPEAKER_03: So this uh no, this wasn't actually Ed Greenwood laser targeting me, because if he were laser targeting me, they'd be an elf or half elf.
1:00:24
SPEAKER_03: So it's just pretty close.
1:00:26
SPEAKER_03: Close, but no cigar, Mr.
1:00:28
SPEAKER_03: Greenwood.
1:00:29
SPEAKER_04: Um almost got her.
1:00:31
SPEAKER_03: Almost got me.
1:00:33
SPEAKER_03: Um so they are they are chaotic neutral in alignment.
1:00:38
SPEAKER_03: Same.
1:00:40
SPEAKER_02: I mean, okay.
1:00:41
SPEAKER_03: Uh life calls or wife calls.
1:00:43
SPEAKER_03: Um, so I feel like I'm about to answer the question you guys probably had.
1:00:48
SPEAKER_03: Uh, Wear Dragon is a bit of a misnomer, as they are not truly lycanthropes.
1:00:53
SPEAKER_03: They are not lycanthropes.
1:00:54
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
1:00:54
SPEAKER_02: Um, that this is better.
1:00:57
SPEAKER_03: The only trait they share with other lycanthropes, because besides the general ability to shift shift forms uh is an immunity to the attacks of normal weapons.
1:01:08
SPEAKER_03: So they don't forcibly change with the moon phase, it's not a disease, um, their abilities cannot be cured or suppressed in any way that, you know, like they they don't they can't uh spread it in any other way other than reproducing.
1:01:25
SPEAKER_03: Right.
1:01:26
SPEAKER_03: So it's not like anthropy.
1:01:28
SPEAKER_03: Weerdragon just sounds cool.
1:01:30
SPEAKER_03: It does.
1:01:30
SPEAKER_03: And it's also the kind of thing that when you're reading an article and you're you know, you scroll down, you see were dragon?
1:01:36
SPEAKER_03: What?
1:01:36
SPEAKER_03: And then you scroll back up, you know.
1:01:38
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:01:39
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:01:39
SPEAKER_02: Because I mean Yeah.
1:01:41
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:01:42
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:01:42
SPEAKER_02: You see the phase were dragon, you're just like, mmm, I want to know what that is.
1:01:48
SPEAKER_04: But uh what is that?
1:01:49
SPEAKER_03: What is that and how do I become one?
1:01:53
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, how do I get afflicted with that?
1:01:55
SPEAKER_02: You don't, apparently.
1:01:56
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:01:56
SPEAKER_03: Sad.
1:01:57
SPEAKER_03: Sad.
1:01:58
SPEAKER_03: So in addition to the usual draconic traits, as mentioned earlier, they have extended 90-foot infravision, the ability to detect hidden or invisible objects within 30 feet.
1:02:09
SPEAKER_03: Typically, dragons can detect um like things that have their their spec is that they can detect things that have been polymorphed or creatures that are invisible.
1:02:17
SPEAKER_03: Right.
1:02:18
SPEAKER_03: Um, where dragons can detect hidden or invisible objects as well.
1:02:21
SPEAKER_03: Um, the ability to use tongues at will, and the ability to cast 15-foot radii, light and darkness spells every six turns.
1:02:32
SPEAKER_03: Interesting.
1:02:33
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:02:33
SPEAKER_03: Um they're also immune to all mind-altering spells and do not truly sleep, therefore they cannot be surprised.
1:02:40
SPEAKER_03: Uh the transformation between forms takes one round, is silent, does not affect their HP, destroys any clothing or armor worn in the human form, and is completely within the dragon's control.
1:02:52
SPEAKER_03: Like I said, no full moon.
1:02:55
SPEAKER_03: No moon face silliness, nothing like that.
1:02:57
SPEAKER_03: And they can remain in one form for as long as desired, and they retain all knowledge and awareness in either form.
1:03:04
SPEAKER_04: So they're closer to like a shapeshifter than like a- Yeah, they're true.
1:03:09
SPEAKER_03: They're closer to um Oh, I forget if hengayokai were like this.
1:03:14
SPEAKER_03: I forget if hengayokai retained their intelligence.
1:03:17
SPEAKER_03: I don't remember.
1:03:18
SPEAKER_03: Anyway.
1:03:19
SPEAKER_03: Um where dragons are very good actors, as I'm sure you can imagine, and prefer to live in humanoid communities as opposed to solitude, uh, like a lot of dragons do.
1:03:32
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:03:33
SPEAKER_03: That's yeah, that's very different to a lot of dragons.
1:03:36
SPEAKER_03: Um, for whatever reason, they do not consort with their own kind, which they can recognize immediately on account of the whole dragons can see dragons have true seeing essentially.
1:03:48
SPEAKER_03: Right.
1:03:48
SPEAKER_03: But they typically are able to blend in with human societies basically perfectly.
1:03:54
SPEAKER_02: Um makes sense.
1:03:56
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:03:58
SPEAKER_03: Shapeshifting into hot woman thing.
1:04:00
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:04:00
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:04:01
SPEAKER_03: Um they I thought this was interesting.
1:04:04
SPEAKER_03: Um, they are described as, quote, not as vain as other dragons, and sometimes submit to temporary dominance, not my wording, if they deem it to be the right play.
1:04:14
SPEAKER_03: And I thought this was interesting.
1:04:16
SPEAKER_03: Just because it like, okay, I'm not saying I feel this way.
1:04:20
SPEAKER_03: Um, and I'm not saying this to cast any kind of aspersion on Ed Greenwood.
1:04:25
SPEAKER_03: I'm just saying that I feel like it's it's an interesting choice to to describe the essentially hot lady dragon as not as vain, because I feel like that's not a choice that most people would have made.
1:04:40
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they wouldn't like I feel like if they were gonna bring their vanity into the equation, they would have made them extremely vain.
1:04:47
SPEAKER_03: And I just think that's interesting.
1:04:48
SPEAKER_03: No, that that is, I would say certainly one of the most unique points I've seen.
1:04:54
SPEAKER_03: And I think to also I think also to say not as vain is to s is not necessarily just physical vanity, but I think it's not as it's not as easy to flatter them as it is other kinds of dragons.
1:05:07
SPEAKER_03: It's not as easy to stroke their ego.
1:05:09
SPEAKER_03: I mean, if they want me to start nope.
1:05:10
SPEAKER_03: Whoa, nope, man.
1:05:14
SPEAKER_03: Whoa.
1:05:15
SPEAKER_03: Oh, Louis has left the chat.
1:05:17
SPEAKER_03: Whoa.
1:05:17
SPEAKER_03: Louin has been banned from the chat.
1:05:19
SPEAKER_03: Um Louin created the chat, and Louis was then banned from the chat.
1:05:25
SPEAKER_03: Um they often this is fun.
1:05:27
SPEAKER_03: They often amass treasure by seducing rich suitors, then killing them later in dragon form.
1:05:35
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
1:05:36
SPEAKER_02: Wow.
1:05:37
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, fucking metal, right?
1:05:39
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
1:05:40
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:05:41
SPEAKER_03: Um they are described as quote, usually the equal of any sage when dealing with the history of the lands they have inhabited, end quote.
1:05:48
SPEAKER_03: They remind me a bit of the oh, was it the Changlong?
1:05:52
SPEAKER_03: The the the weather that's not rain dragons.
1:05:56
SPEAKER_03: No, the the ones that the rain.
1:06:00
SPEAKER_03: The rain.
1:06:00
SPEAKER_03: The ones that um are like the nobles uh that hang out with humans on fucking riverboats and shit.
1:06:06
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, babies and stuff.
1:06:08
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, those.
1:06:09
SPEAKER_03: The feudal lord ones, because the other ones were the handmade ones.
1:06:12
SPEAKER_03: Um fuck.
1:06:14
SPEAKER_03: Um also it says uh uh the the phrasing of this is funny to me.
1:06:20
SPEAKER_03: Um apparently one is rumored to have lived in water deep, uh, hiding as the concert of a military officer.
1:06:26
SPEAKER_03: And I'm gonna say that since this is written by Ed Greenwood, that's him saying this is absolutely true.
1:06:33
SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah.
1:06:34
SPEAKER_03: Because he's the one in control of that campaign setting.
1:06:38
SPEAKER_03: That entire so that's Ed Greenwood saying, yeah, there's totally a dragon lady fucking one of the higher military officers in one of the people.
1:06:47
SPEAKER_02: And he has no idea.
1:06:49
SPEAKER_03: Or does he?
1:06:51
SPEAKER_03: Maybe he maybe he's maybe stammer.
1:06:53
SPEAKER_03: Maybe he's a fellow man of culture, maybe he's into it, you know?
1:06:56
SPEAKER_02: Hey, you know, you do you.
1:06:58
SPEAKER_03: Or her as a word.
1:06:59
SPEAKER_03: Or her.
1:07:00
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:07:01
SPEAKER_03: Um stupid.
1:07:04
SPEAKER_02: Jesus Christ.
1:07:05
SPEAKER_03: Fuck.
1:07:05
SPEAKER_03: The were dragon breath weapon is a cloud of blue vapor in the shape of a cone, uh, 70 feet long and 25 feet in base diameter.
1:07:13
SPEAKER_03: Uh within the cone for two to four rounds, the vapors will cause silence, snuff out and prevent any uh natural or magical heat, fire, or electric discharge, and dispel any illusions.
1:07:26
SPEAKER_03: Uh the vapors remain stationary regardless of any natural or magical wind and vanish after two to four rounds, seemingly in reaction with the surrounding air, like a chemical reaction.
1:07:38
SPEAKER_03: Huh.
1:07:38
SPEAKER_03: So honestly, like the wear dragons are kind of just like a grab bag of a whole bunch of crazy shit, but I'm kind of into it.
1:07:46
SPEAKER_03: And not not just because they're sexy dragon ladies.
1:07:50
SPEAKER_03: Not just.
1:07:50
SPEAKER_03: Not just because I mean that's part of it.
1:07:52
SPEAKER_03: I won't lie.
1:07:53
SPEAKER_03: I mean, I'm not gonna do it.
1:07:54
SPEAKER_03: That's fair.
1:07:55
SPEAKER_03: I would call you out on it.
1:07:56
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:07:57
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:07:57
SPEAKER_02: Like, even if you were the other tribe.
1:08:00
SPEAKER_03: They're just kind of like a grab bag of random shit, like, but I'm kind of into it.
1:08:05
SPEAKER_03: It's kind of like it's kind of like Ed Greenwood took a bunch of pasta, but like different kinds of pasta, like spaghetti, farfolet, and all this other stuff, and boiled it.
1:08:16
SPEAKER_03: And then to see if it was El Dante, threw it all against the wall and saw what stuck.
1:08:20
SPEAKER_03: But it was like five different kinds of pasta.
1:08:21
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:08:22
SPEAKER_03: It's beautiful.
1:08:23
SPEAKER_03: Yes, right.
1:08:25
SPEAKER_03: And then he was right, yes.
1:08:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:08:27
SPEAKER_03: So also, this is the second time I'm gonna do this, and I'm sorry.
1:08:31
SPEAKER_02: Oh boy.
1:08:31
SPEAKER_03: Um, Fang Dragons and Sand Dragons are also in this.
1:08:36
SPEAKER_03: Um, and I also kind of already did an episode about them.
1:08:40
SPEAKER_02: You you did.
1:08:41
SPEAKER_03: Um, which was the I believe uh oh, what was it called?
1:08:44
SPEAKER_03: Dragons of another palette palette, yeah.
1:08:47
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, um, where I talked about uh was it yeah.
1:08:51
SPEAKER_03: Wait, yes, yeah, because then they became the um Fang Sand and Deep Dragons became the alternate colors of chromatic dragons in fourth edition.
1:09:00
SPEAKER_03: So I talked about Fang Dragons and Sand Dragons in that episode.
1:09:03
SPEAKER_03: Um, sorry.
1:09:06
SPEAKER_03: I've I don't know why I feel like such an asshole for being like, hey, go listen to this other episode that I did.
1:09:13
SPEAKER_03: But I don't want to rehash it for people who have already listened to that episode.
1:09:20
SPEAKER_03: So, um stone dragons.
1:09:22
SPEAKER_03: Stone dragons.
1:09:23
SPEAKER_03: Stone dragons uh are great.
1:09:27
SPEAKER_03: Are great.
1:09:29
SPEAKER_02: They are great.
1:09:30
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
1:09:32
SPEAKER_03: That one didn't land.
1:09:33
SPEAKER_03: They can't all be winners.
1:09:34
SPEAKER_03: Um, stone dragons are about 35 feet long and gray in color, generally looking like a lump of rocks.
1:09:41
SPEAKER_03: Beautiful.
1:09:42
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they lack wings um but can leap five times a day per the spell jump.
1:09:48
SPEAKER_03: So they're not actually stone dragons, they're stone dragoons.
1:09:52
SPEAKER_02: Oh my god.
1:09:55
SPEAKER_03: I literally had that one in my head yesterday, and I was like, I should write that down.
1:10:00
SPEAKER_03: And then I was like, no, I'm gonna remember that one.
1:10:03
SPEAKER_03: Lewin did remember this.
1:10:04
SPEAKER_03: Lewin is again blocked from the chat.
1:10:07
SPEAKER_03: Uh, due to their rock-like appearance, a stone dragon has a 55% chance of blending in with their surroundings, and I just think that number's funny.
1:10:16
SPEAKER_03: Not 50, not 60, not 75, not 80, 55.
1:10:22
SPEAKER_03: I don't know why.
1:10:23
SPEAKER_03: Just a random feeling.
1:10:25
SPEAKER_03: It's like just random enough, but not too random.
1:10:28
SPEAKER_03: Right.
1:10:29
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:10:29
SPEAKER_03: It's not like 54%.
1:10:32
SPEAKER_03: It's 55.
1:10:33
SPEAKER_03: Um, their height isn't just for show or concealment.
1:10:37
SPEAKER_03: Uh sharp weapons do half damage and must say versus crushing blow or do no damage and also break.
1:10:44
SPEAKER_03: Oh.
1:10:44
SPEAKER_02: Whoa.
1:10:45
SPEAKER_03: So don't hit this thing with your sword.
1:10:47
SPEAKER_03: No.
1:10:47
SPEAKER_03: No.
1:10:47
SPEAKER_03: Uh the same also applies to missile weapons.
1:10:50
SPEAKER_03: So don't shoot it with your crossbow.
1:10:52
SPEAKER_03: Or magic missile, I guess.
1:10:54
SPEAKER_03: Well, I don't know.
1:10:57
SPEAKER_03: Okay, this is when this is when the the asshole DM and the asshole player arguing about whether or not magic missile counts as a missile weapon.
1:11:08
SPEAKER_04: It is technically a magical weapon.
1:11:10
SPEAKER_02: It is technically a magical weapon.
1:11:12
SPEAKER_04: Oh, it is?
1:11:12
SPEAKER_04: I mean, it's a magic attack.
1:11:14
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, all magic attacks are magical.
1:11:17
SPEAKER_04: End of sentence.
1:11:20
SPEAKER_03: All magic attacks are magical.
1:11:22
SPEAKER_03: You heard it here first, folks.
1:11:24
SPEAKER_03: I'm not wrong.
1:11:26
SPEAKER_02: You are not wrong.
1:11:27
SPEAKER_03: Uh blunt weapons still work fine, however.
1:11:30
SPEAKER_03: So hit it with your your hammer.
1:11:33
SPEAKER_03: Club.
1:11:34
SPEAKER_02: Club, hammer, mace.
1:11:36
SPEAKER_03: Fists?
1:11:37
SPEAKER_02: Fists or blunt weapons?
1:11:40
SPEAKER_02: So take a monk with you.
1:11:41
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I was supposed to say so.
1:11:42
SPEAKER_03: Then he he brings his monk party member who can't stand him into field, like, oh well, he gets to punch in and doesn't hurt.
1:11:49
SPEAKER_03: Anyway.
1:11:50
SPEAKER_02: Um Dude, I punched a dragon.
1:11:53
SPEAKER_03: Fuck yeah.
1:11:54
SPEAKER_03: I punched a rock dragon.
1:11:56
SPEAKER_03: Uh they save versus fire and acid at uh minus one and take plus one damage to fire an acid, therefore they're essentially weak against those.
1:12:04
SPEAKER_03: But save versus cold at plus one and take negative one damage to cold, which I think is an interesting.
1:12:12
SPEAKER_02: So I have some minor issue with I also have uh questions.
1:12:19
SPEAKER_02: Because it's a stone dragon.
1:12:21
SPEAKER_02: It fire should not be affecting it that much.
1:12:25
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
1:12:26
SPEAKER_02: Fire does not do much to stone other than scorch it unless it's like super fucking hot.
1:12:33
SPEAKER_03: Oh, also, um this article was by uh Mike Persinger.
1:12:38
SPEAKER_03: I forgot to thank you, Mike.
1:12:40
SPEAKER_03: Um I love how I say thank you to these people for talking about dragons.
1:12:45
SPEAKER_03: I mean, because like the same.
1:12:48
SPEAKER_03: I thank you.
1:12:49
SPEAKER_03: Thank you for the dragons.
1:12:51
SPEAKER_03: This next bit about their resistances does make sense, though.
1:12:54
SPEAKER_03: Um Earth-based attacks that do not provoke saving throws do half damage against stone dragons, and earth-based attacks that do provoke saving throws either do half damage or no damage, depending on if the stone dragons saved or failed, which this is kind of like fifth edition's um evasion, like the rogue ability evasion.
1:13:12
SPEAKER_03: Um spells such as stone to flesh have no effect on stone dragons, which is probably good.
1:13:17
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:13:17
SPEAKER_02: Well, for them.
1:13:18
SPEAKER_02: For for them.
1:13:19
SPEAKER_02: For them.
1:13:20
SPEAKER_02: For anyone else, probably not.
1:13:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:13:23
SPEAKER_03: I mean, they're lawful neutral, so they're probably not gonna intentionally hurt you.
1:13:27
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they're probably not gonna go out of their way to hurt you unless you're like jaywalking.
1:13:34
SPEAKER_03: Hmm.
1:13:34
SPEAKER_03: You know.
1:13:35
SPEAKER_03: Um, stone dragons are very solitary and inhabit, wow, believe it or not, rocky desert-like areas.
1:13:42
SPEAKER_03: What?
1:13:42
SPEAKER_03: They're like rocks.
1:13:44
SPEAKER_03: No, they live in the fucking ocean.
1:13:46
SPEAKER_03: Um, they rarely interact with uh the likes of men, but when approached, they can be very helpful or very harmful.
1:13:54
SPEAKER_02: Hmm.
1:13:55
SPEAKER_02: Are you willing to take this risk?
1:13:58
SPEAKER_04: I mean Lua and dragons are involved.
1:14:00
SPEAKER_04: What do you think?
1:14:01
SPEAKER_02: I mean, the answer is yes.
1:14:02
SPEAKER_03: No, I'm too I'm too busy off trying to find and seduce a weird dragon.
1:14:06
SPEAKER_03: Um not wrong.
1:14:08
SPEAKER_03: They can they fuck.
1:14:10
SPEAKER_03: Uh they make I mean I don't know.
1:14:14
SPEAKER_03: It doesn't say if they can or not.
1:14:16
SPEAKER_03: Uh they eat rocks for sustenance and consider gems delicacies, same.
1:14:21
SPEAKER_03: Uh, preferring them over any other form of treasure to a degree even greater than the average dragon.
1:14:27
SPEAKER_03: These guys fucking love gems.
1:14:29
SPEAKER_03: I've I've noticed.
1:14:30
SPEAKER_03: Um, they will often trade other types of treasure for gems, even up to double the actual value of the gem.
1:14:37
SPEAKER_03: So they're not very smart traders.
1:14:41
SPEAKER_02: I mean they just love gems.
1:14:43
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:14:44
SPEAKER_03: I mean, yeah.
1:14:45
SPEAKER_03: I mean, what you said is not incorrect.
1:14:48
SPEAKER_03: Because they just eat them.
1:14:49
SPEAKER_03: Um, stone dragons gain a variety of, believe it or not, earth-based spells as they age.
1:14:56
SPEAKER_03: These guys also these guys seem to they acquire these spells, um, like they use them as magic users, but they acquire them kind of naturally.
1:15:06
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
1:15:07
SPEAKER_03: Like how um, I believe it was sand dragons acquire them in a pretty similar manner to druids.
1:15:14
SPEAKER_03: Um, but they use them as magic users.
1:15:16
SPEAKER_03: Wait, you mean sorcerers?
1:15:18
SPEAKER_03: No, it was no, it was druids in this Oh oh yeah, no, in this um era of source material.
1:15:24
SPEAKER_03: No, you're you're right, my bad.
1:15:26
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, it's similar to how sorcerers do in modern D modern DD, though.
1:15:31
SPEAKER_03: Um, and these include but are not limited to shatter, transmute rock to mud, wall of stone, stone shape, statue, conjure earth elemental, earthquake, and allies.
1:15:41
SPEAKER_03: And allies is a power that is similar to Charm Monster, but only affects rock-based creatures such as Earth Elementals, Umber Hulks, that kind of thing.
1:15:52
SPEAKER_02: All does make sense.
1:15:53
SPEAKER_03: So, um for some reason these guys have three different breath weapons.
1:15:59
SPEAKER_03: G Stone Dragons, how come Auscarath lets you have three breath weapons?
1:16:05
SPEAKER_03: You couldn't even get through that without laughing.
1:16:07
SPEAKER_03: It was it was pretty good.
1:16:09
SPEAKER_03: No, I just hit my my uh the ball against my teeth.
1:16:15
SPEAKER_03: Uh and I was worried for a moment.
1:16:17
SPEAKER_03: Um, each of which are usable three times per day.
1:16:20
SPEAKER_03: So they essentially get nine breath weapons a day.
1:16:23
SPEAKER_03: Um god damn, man.
1:16:26
SPEAKER_03: Just you don't need that many breath weapons.
1:16:28
SPEAKER_03: That's fine.
1:16:29
SPEAKER_03: These aren't quite as beefy.
1:16:32
SPEAKER_03: Not quite.
1:16:33
SPEAKER_03: Um the as the feeble mind ray, no.
1:16:37
SPEAKER_03: Um the first shoots five to ten three-foot diameter rocks.
1:16:42
SPEAKER_04: I'm sorry, did you just tell me that that wasn't as beefy?
1:16:45
SPEAKER_02: Hmm.
1:16:45
SPEAKER_02: I feel like I've been lied to.
1:16:47
SPEAKER_03: From the dragon's mouth, which are waste products from the dragon's mouth.
1:16:51
SPEAKER_03: Oh, that's nice.
1:16:52
SPEAKER_03: Um, I mean, so people they eat rocks and gemstones.
1:16:55
SPEAKER_03: So it's not quite as gross as it could be?
1:16:59
SPEAKER_03: No.
1:16:59
SPEAKER_03: I mean, and it's literally just literally rock missiles.
1:17:03
SPEAKER_03: I would honestly wrong.
1:17:04
SPEAKER_03: I would take getting hit by one of these than getting hit by the stupid ray.
1:17:08
SPEAKER_03: So um the second is a gas cloud, um, five feet wide, six feet long, and three feet deep.
1:17:14
SPEAKER_03: Um, and it acts like a slow spell for as many rounds as the dragon has hit dice.
1:17:19
SPEAKER_03: However, the cloud loses effectiveness after one round.
1:17:22
SPEAKER_03: So essentially, you have to be in it when it hits to be affected by it.
1:17:26
SPEAKER_03: If you walk into it afterwards, it seems like you're fine.
1:17:28
SPEAKER_03: That's my understanding of the reading.
1:17:30
SPEAKER_02: That that's what it sounds like.
1:17:31
SPEAKER_02: If it loses its effectiveness after one round, then Yeah.
1:17:35
SPEAKER_03: It just, it just, if you are hit by this effect, it lasts for as long as the dragon has hit dice.
1:17:39
SPEAKER_03: Um, the third is also glass uh gas cloud, excuse me, of the same dimensions.
1:17:45
SPEAKER_03: However, if anyone caught within fails to save, then they are turned to stone.
1:17:49
SPEAKER_04: Oh no.
1:17:50
SPEAKER_04: That's a little beefy.
1:17:51
SPEAKER_03: Um the effects of this petrification are permanent, but maybe reversed through typical magical methods.
1:17:58
SPEAKER_03: Okay, so not beefy, you know.
1:18:00
SPEAKER_02: Stone to flesh spell.
1:18:02
SPEAKER_03: You don't need, yeah, well, you don't need a wish like your friend was digested or something.
1:18:08
SPEAKER_03: Digested.
1:18:09
SPEAKER_03: You know?
1:18:10
SPEAKER_03: It's just you your normal, your normal, like stone to flesh kind of thing.
1:18:14
SPEAKER_02: You just have to make sure you can bring them back and try not to break anything off of them in the process.
1:18:20
SPEAKER_02: Ooh.
1:18:21
SPEAKER_04: You broke up my dick, guys.
1:18:23
SPEAKER_04: I hate you.
1:18:24
SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
1:18:24
SPEAKER_04: I don't know why that was the first thing I know why it was the first thing you went for.
1:18:28
SPEAKER_04: Because I'm you.
1:18:30
SPEAKER_04: I'm Hello, this is Lewin.
1:18:32
SPEAKER_03: Hi, I'm in case you haven't met her.
1:18:35
SPEAKER_03: 12 years old on the inside.
1:18:37
SPEAKER_03: So that's all I have on these dragon dragon dragons dragons.
1:18:42
SPEAKER_02: Dragon dragon dragons.
1:18:44
SPEAKER_03: That the well keeps going deeper.
1:18:46
SPEAKER_03: But you know what?
1:18:47
SPEAKER_03: We still haven't covered like red dragons.
1:18:50
SPEAKER_03: Just like fucking chromatic and italic, yeah.
1:18:53
SPEAKER_03: Just like fucking regular ass red dragons.
1:18:55
SPEAKER_02: Oh, I thought you were gonna say elves part two.
1:18:57
SPEAKER_03: I mean, also that, yeah.
1:18:58
SPEAKER_03: What's an elf?
1:19:00
SPEAKER_02: Elves are real.
1:19:01
SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
1:19:02
SPEAKER_03: The government just wants you to think that.
1:19:04
SPEAKER_02: So much for listening.
1:19:06
SPEAKER_02: Don't forget to follow us on all of our various social media platforms.
1:19:10
SPEAKER_02: Spread the word to your friends, your family, your co-workers.
1:19:14
SPEAKER_04: Your friends who might be wear dragons.
1:19:16
SPEAKER_04: Well, give them Lewin's number.
1:19:20
SPEAKER_04: You'll know it.
1:19:21
SPEAKER_04: Nope.
1:19:21
SPEAKER_04: You'll you'll know it.
1:19:22
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
1:19:24
SPEAKER_04: Just it'll come to you because the only time her number will truly be revealed.
1:19:30
SPEAKER_04: Or just her Twitter handle.
1:19:32
SPEAKER_03: That would work too.
1:19:33
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, honestly, yeah.
1:19:34
SPEAKER_03: Or my Real I mean, really anything.
1:19:36
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that too.
1:19:37
SPEAKER_03: Call me.
1:19:39
unknown: Shh.
1:19:41
SPEAKER_03: If you have anything you want to suggest uh as a topic for us.
1:19:46
SPEAKER_03: Or if you're a wear dragon who wants to you can email us at dungeonpedia.podcast at gmail.com.
1:19:52
SPEAKER_03: Hopefully I'll see it before Taylor and Travis do.
1:19:55
SPEAKER_02: And we're just we're we gotta get out of this.
1:19:57
SPEAKER_02: Thank you once again for listening, and we will catch you here next week, hopefully, if we haven't driven you away, on Dungeonpedia.
1:20:07
SPEAKER_03: Oh, am I not allowed to do the rest of the Dragon's Beast theory entries?
1:20:11
SPEAKER_03: I mean, I think you're required to have.
1:20:14
SPEAKER_03: But I I think they make me crazy.
1:20:16
SPEAKER_03: They make you crazy.