Latest / Black Girls Consult TOO! / Episode 86: Pushing Past Limiting Beliefs to Build Your Practice [REBROADCAST]

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Episode 86: Pushing Past Limiting Beliefs to Build Your Practice [REBROADCAST] · Black Girls Consult TOO!

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: There's a misconception that we don't exist, that somehow our ability to excel at the highest level of our industry is limited, that overcoming barriers as a woman of color would be insurmountable.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: But what would happen if we decided to venture out on our own, despite everything we were up against?
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you Welcome to the Black Girls Console 2 podcast.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: I'm your host, dr Angelina Davis, a healthcare consultant, consulting coach, high performance fanatic wife and proud girl mom.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: I help transform female professionals into thriving solo consultants and, just like you, I'm wearing all the hats and doing all the things.
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: So this podcast is to empower you to move past fear, to start and grow a successful consulting business, despite the obstacles you may encounter.
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: We'll dive deep into the consulting practice, business strategy, mindset and more.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: So grab your cup of coffee or tea, if that's your thing, and let's get started.
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: Well, hello there.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Black Girls Console 2 podcast.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: I'm your host, dr Angelina Davis, and today we are going to be talking about limiting beliefs, and I decided to do this in a two-part series.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: Can I call it a series?
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: I don't necessarily know if I can call it a series if it's only two.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: I wish this was live so you can correct me, but we're going to call it a series today.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: We're going to do this in two parts because I think around this topic, there's a difference in what we see as limiting beliefs when we first start and what we have to think about what we may face later down the road.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: So we're going to break this up a bit.
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: But in this first part of the series, in part one, we're going to be talking about how you can push past limiting beliefs to build your business, to build your practice, and I wanted to really dive into this for a number of reasons.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: But one is because your limiting beliefs can really keep you stuck and stagnant, and it is the mindset work that we often overlook or don't necessarily prioritize that can make such a difference in our ability to achieve everything that we desire.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: And really, when you're thinking about this whole concept of mindset work and changing our beliefs and our belief systems, it's really a continual process.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: Different challenges are going to arise over time.
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: We're going to have to put different tools in place in order to tackle those challenges, and so we are going to start here, at the beginning, when you're thinking about either starting your consulting business or you are trying to really get that business off the ground, because there are some very common beliefs that keep us from reaching our full potential.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: Oftentimes it's because the start is rough.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: It just is.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: It is a difficult place to be in.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: You have to figure out how you can actually package your genius to sell.
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: You don't have clients right now to serve, or maybe just a few.
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: It's not enough for you to really live on or have the lifestyle that you desire, and you really don't know what to do.
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: And it's because of this uncertainty that our minds start to play tricks on us and our mind begins to shape how we show up in our businesses, how we show up to create and to build something that we would really be proud of.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: So I want to touch on three common limiting beliefs that I think many new early stage consultants face that can really pose a problem and keep you from achieving your goals.
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: And once we're able to break these barriers down and really shift our mindset around these beliefs, I think you'll see everything take off and definitely move forward for the better.
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: I remember when I first started I had a lot of doubt.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: I just really remember being so fearful of making a mistake.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: I think a lot of this came because I was so worried about what other people thought of me, especially as a woman of color working in an environment where I had no one else around that looked like me, especially that looked like me serving in that role at the time, and I thought that I had to carry the weight of all of that with me day after day, that I couldn't risk being proved wrong, that I couldn't risk making a mistake, and that was heavy for me and I began to doubt my ability.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: I began to question whether or not I truly deserve to be in that role, and I didn't want to prove those who may have doubted whether or not I could show up and work effectively.
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: I didn't want to prove them right.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: You know, I didn't want to somehow make a mistake that will allow them to say I told you so.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: I told you shouldn't have brought her on.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: I told you she couldn't do the job.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: I told you she wasn't going to be strong enough, she wasn't going to be smart enough, she wasn't going to be able to help people the way that we need her to help others.
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: I was afraid of that, and because I had this fear, because I had this limiting belief as to whether or not I could actually show up and serve.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: I had self-doubt.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: That was the big limiting belief that I had at the time, and let me tell you what self-doubt would do for you.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: It will cause you to underperform.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: So it's almost like this self-fulfilling prophecy when you doubt your ability, you will call in all of those things that you fear the most, because you began to question every last decision that you make.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: You question everything.
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: The advice you give that you end up giving to others is going to be ultra conservative, because you're worried about whether or not you are able to go out on a risk and risk the chance that what you're recommending may not work or may be wrong.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: You want to completely avoid taking risks, and so it takes you two to three times longer to not only complete tasks, but you're checking those things over 10 and 11 times.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: You're not allowing yourself to be creative when you're making recommendations to clients, and so they feel as if you're not pushing them far enough.
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: You're not helping them advance at the speed that they would like, because, remember, part of what you're doing as a consultant is really speeding their process along.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: You're making it easier, you're allowing them to achieve their goals faster, but if you are doing all these extra things, it's taking you more time to get them to that point, and so you can't do your best work that way.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: In order for you to get your business fully off the ground and growing, you are going to have to alleviate this doubt in your mind, and although there are a number of ways that you can do this, the one thing that I found to be helpful is really tracking and recalling all of your wins.
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: When we're in a new environment, we're taking on a new challenge, we forget that we've accomplished so much.
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: We forget how smart, how successful, how intelligent, how capable we actually are, because now we're in this new environment, we feel like we have to prove ourselves.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: We feel like we have to do something different, that we can't carry all of our wins with us, but in those moments when you're starting out and you're beginning to build, I need you to remember everything that you did before.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: I need you to think about all of those things that allowed you to get to this point, what made you feel so confident to start this business in the first place, what allowed you to see yourself as an expert before you even begin to be faced with these doubts and these fears.
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: Those are those things that you want to recall over and over and over again.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: You have to play this in your mind over and over again, because you may feel like you're starting something completely new when you're beginning this journey, but you're not.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: This is a continuation of where you've already been.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: This is a continuation of your success.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: This is the reason why you're able to start this business.
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: You're starting this business because you have something to offer other people, because you've been there, and I think we often forget to carry all of those wins with us, because that is what's going to keep you from doubting yourself, from fearing, from feeling less than you have to bring all that with you, and you have to know that in these moments when you're just starting out, you're not starting at ground zero.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: You just have to remember that you are on a continual journey.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: You are continuing to move forward and advancing from the place that you have been.
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: So if you are leaving a place where you've accomplished a lot, you're starting your business in that same place too.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: Are you a female solo consultant or expert in your field who desires to build and grow a highly profitable consulting practice, or are you finding it difficult to build your business and expand your presence in your industry to generate the revenue you desire?
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: If so, my signature program, expand to Excel, was created with you in mind.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: It's a 12-week one-on-one curriculum-based coaching program developed to help you create and implement a personal strategy to build and grow a highly successful and profitable business as a solo consultant, no matter the industry.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: So visit wwwexcelaconseltingcom to learn more and to schedule your next step call.
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: A huge challenge that we all face when we're trying to start a consulting business is figuring out where our clients will come from.
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: Where are we going to really be able to generate that business?
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: How are we going to get these contracts in order to really grow and achieve all of our goals?
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: That just seems so overwhelming when you're starting, and I think that it's often funny that you don't notice how many people are actually in your industry until you decide to really compete for business.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: You think at the very beginning, when you are getting that business license and you're getting your website up, you're super excited and you think that you have something different to offer.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: You have no idea as to what's really out there.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: I mean, you've done a little bit of research.
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: Even you've analyzed the industry and the situation, but you see just nothing but possibility when you're starting.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: But somewhere along that line, things begin to change and you know it's like when you choose a car.
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: You go to the car lot and you are looking for a new car and you may decide, hey, I'm going to get that blue car with the white interior.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: I'm thinking about this Tesla that I saw in a park in tech the other day.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: But you're going to get this blue car with the white interior because it's unique.
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: You haven't seen anything like it.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: The thing was parked right under the light and I was like, oh, this is beautiful, I love it and it's a car that I would love to go and purchase right now.
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: And so you go to the car lot.
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: You find that dream car is blue, with the white interior.
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: You're like nobody has this, I'm the dopest person out there and you buy it.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: You drive off the lot and I promise you, in about 10 minutes you're gonna see like 10 other versions of it.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: And you're just thinking to yourself I never saw this blue car with white interior before.
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: But now, everywhere I turn, I'm seeing nothing but blue cars with white interior.
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: Right Blue, tesla's white with white interior, and so this is actually something that's called I believe it's like the batter mine Hoff phenomenon, and this is something that we consider, or is considered, to be, a frequency illusion.
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: It's an illusion of sorts, because in reality, nothing changed.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: There have always been blue cars with white interior on the streets.
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: It's always been that.
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: We have had a number of other blue cars out there, but because you weren't noticing it, you thought it didn't exist.
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: You weren't noticing it because your attention wasn't being drawn to it.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: You weren't being drawn to that particular car, and so it gives you this illusion that you are experiencing something that is new and that didn't exist before.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: But that's really not true.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: Those cars were always there, and this is very similar to how we approach business.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: We can get in, get started and feel like you just can't compete.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: I know, I thought that before I just can't compete.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: The market is overcrowded, there are too many people trying to do the same thing that I'm doing, and that's just a form of scarcity mindset.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: You know, I read a statistic recently that stated if you only sold, only if you only sold to the top 1% of wealthy English speaking countries.
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: So this is the US, canada, australia, the United Kingdom.
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: That is, 3.6 million people, 1%.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: 3.6 million.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: That was what I read previously, but I actually calculated the numbers on this just for 2021.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: And it is actually 4.6 million people, 1%.
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: 1% from a small fraction of the world.
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: So I'm saying all that to say that, yes, in most markets it is overcrowded, definitely, with everyone transitioning online in the midst of the pandemic and all the changes that have happened, you know, over this course of time this is being recorded in late 2021, just for those who may be listening in the future but with the transition online, for most people, it has opened opportunity, opened the doors of opportunity for people to get started and to start their businesses.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: So, yes, it's going to feel like the market is overcrowded, but the thing is similar to that illusion that we talked about.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: That is our limiting belief.
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: That's us thinking that we cannot compete in this overcrowded market, when the market was always this way.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: The market was this way when you got the business license.
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: The market was this way when you decided to start your business and you thought it was such a great idea and you hadn't seen it.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: You have to remember that what you're feeling is a limiting belief because it's an illusion.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: When you have a scarcity mindset, you focus in on the challenges.
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: You see the challenge of standing out in a crowded market, and that doesn't near seems impossible, especially without a massive marketing budget.
• 14:47
  Speaker 1: But what really complicates this picture further is that when you don't see anybody that looks like you, then the market actually seems even more crowded and even more impossible to break into, because you can't see another version that seems similar to you, that has been successful, and so in your mind you begin to tell yourself this is just not going to work.
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: You internalize all that is meaning there's not enough room for you to succeed, that there's not enough room for you to actually build the business that you want, that what you desire is not available to you.
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: In reality, there is more than enough room, just like I talked about that 4.6 million people, 1%, 4.6 million there are more than enough clients out there for you to serve.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: There are more than enough businesses for you to work with.
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: There is the ability for you to really build your business.
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: So you have to switch this thinking from a belief in competition, in competing for business, trying to win business we talk about it all the time as winning business.
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: That's very it's very common to hear that mentioned, especially in a consulting world.
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: I won that contract, I won this business and technically there's nothing, I guess you would say wrong with using that terminology.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: But in terms of mindset, you have to think of it differently, because if you're thinking about winning that contract or winning that business, you're seeing it as a competition, and in a competition typically there's one winner, and so in your mind you're seeing scarcity, because you're thinking that there is only one winner, only one person that can win the business, only one person that that client can work with, and in reality that's not true.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: That client can choose to work with multiple people, that client can decide to work on different things, that business can contract with multiple consultants.
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: So you have to change this mindset and really look for instead how you can really connect and collaborate with other people, how you can begin to see that there is room for you and there's room available for you to succeed.
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: This is actually more abundant thinking, and this is what will keep you from stalling and not moving forward, especially at the beginning, because previously you may have been telling yourself there's no room for me, this is not gonna matter, why try?
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: Because I'm not gonna be able to succeed.
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: I'm not seeing any growth.
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: This must mean that my idea is bad.
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: Instead of you stalling on thoughts like that, you're moving forward because you're focused on if I can just get this collaboration, if I can just work with this one person, if I can just partner with someone else, and that seems much more feasible for you to win.
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: And so one of the things that we have to overcome in terms of limiting beliefs is this scarcity mindset and thinking that the market is too crowded because it's not so.
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: This last limiting belief is something that really comes from a strength that most consultants have, and that is that most consultants average consultant is someone who many people would consider to be very ambitious, very ambitious and to be overachievers, and that is a good thing.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: That is what leads to outperforming your peers and what really helps you to reach this level of expert status and to enhance your knowledge and your experiences.
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: But the thing to consider is that we are often taking things over the top, and that means that we're trying to make things perfect, and, although this can be a great thing at first glance, it is also something that can signal an area that can be a limiting belief that stalls our growth, that keeps us from moving forward.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: We believe that everything has to be perfect before you launch.
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: This is an aspect of perfectionism.
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: This is where perfectionism becomes a huge obstacle, and this limiting belief of needing perfection in order to start is what keeps many people from moving forward.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: They may have started their business on paper, they may have even done a little bit of work here and there, but they have oftentimes not moved forward fully because they're not at the place that they wanna be at.
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: The website isn't perfect yet.
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: You don't have the perfect content to post on social media.
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: You don't have the massive following that would be perfect for you to really put your business out there.
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: So you don't feel uncomfortable when people ask or friends see you doing the work.
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: You have this perception of perfectionism that keeps you from growing and advancing and definitely keeps you from making money.
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: So this is a huge limiting belief.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: It's this idea that we can't make a mistake, that we can't be seen as being less than perfect, because that would mean that we're not truly an expert.
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: It's that type of belief that keeps us stuck and as women, especially women of color, we mistakenly see this imperfection as evidence, sometimes, of how we are not qualified for the job, or how we are not truly an expert, or how we are not at the same level or our services are of the same caliber as our counterparts.
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: It's that sense of perfectionism, that limiting belief, that keeps us stuck, and so overcoming this belief really requires us to take these things that we have often seen as standards, as examples of what it means to be of high quality, these people that we've put up on pedestals and admired.
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: We have to put those in the proper frame of reference, because, in reality, those individuals make mistakes too.
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: Those things that we're looking at as standards are not perfect.
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: None of that is perfect, and really, this perfectionism is a source of procrastination.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: It keeps us from moving ahead.
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: We get locked in our heads, we start to overthink, we start tinkering, we're evaluating all our options, we're constantly studying and we're doing anything and everything else other than taking meaningful steps and action to achieve our goals, and so what that means is that you're not building, you're not growing, and I understand because I have been there.
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: I have gone through that experience where I've kept myself busy working on anything and everything other than those things that are going to be tied to me generating revenue, being able to collaborate with other people that are tied to anything and everything but me being able to land the contracts that I need in order for my business to thrive.
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: It's just all busy work.
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: It's all things that we think that we need in order to show up perfectly in the market, and it is a source of procrastination, it is keeping us stuck, and that is a belief that we have to push against and we have to move past.
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: You have to be able to recognize that, when perfectionism is arising, that there is the need in that moment to really resist that temptation and that we have to move forward with whatever we're working on, even if it's not done to the level that we would desire.
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: Now, I don't mean, don't do things in excellence.
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: I definitely believe that you need to focus on excellence.
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: You need to be focused on quality, providing a high quality experience, but those two things are different from things being perfect.
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: Just because something goes up, high quality, high value doesn't make it perfect.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: The knowledge that you're going to be sharing is going to be of high quality and high value, but it may not be perfect.
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: You're going to have iterations that are going to occur over and over again so that you can make it better and better as you work with more clients.
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: As you go through this experience over time, you're going to constantly improve.
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: It's not perfect, but it can still be of high quality, it can still be of high value, and that's why you have to get comfortable with really taking this messy and imperfect action.
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: It doesn't need to be perfect for you to start, and once you realize that this perfectionism piece, this need to be perfect, this need to show up in a certain way it's just a source of procrastination is keeping you from starting, keeping you from building, keeping you from growing, then you will begin to feel more comfortable taking those steps, in spite of it not being exactly the way that you want to really get your services and your offer out there.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: People have to be able to see what you're able to offer.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: In order to buy from you, in order to request for your help, in order to sign that contract, in order for you to convert those prospects and leads to clients, they have to see your services, they have to know what you're doing, and they can't find that out if you are stuck in this perfectionism tailspin.
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: You have to move past that.
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: You have to stop procrastinating and just get started.
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be perfect when you start.
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: No one is perfect when you start, I don't care who you look at, no matter how big they are right now.
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: If you go back and scroll back through a lot of their older content and how they showed up initially in the industry, it was not perfect.
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: That's actually an exercise that I like to use and I have clients use.
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: Go back through to the early stages.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: If they still have it up on their social media accounts, which many do, scroll back through to the very beginning.
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: Look at what their content looked like.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: Some of the biggest names in the industry had some of the clunkiest websites, some of the most disconnected and poor content when they started, but it was the best they can do at the time and because they didn't allow perfectionism to get in the way, to be their source of procrastination, and they continued to move forward, they gained that clarity over time, they improved over time and now they've achieved everything that you're trying to achieve in your journey.
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: You have the ability to go even further, but you got to start and so we have to get over this whole thought process, in this perfectionism that is limiting us and keeping us in the same place and keeping us from being able to move forward.
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: So this limiting belief, the third limiting belief that it needs to be perfect, that's something that we have to move past.
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: These are just a few limiting beliefs that we hold on to and that we unknowingly allow to really hinder our progress.
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: We allow these things to keep us from starting our consulting business.
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: We allow these things to keep us from really getting our businesses fully off the ground and growing and thriving, and we have to get past that.
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: In order for you to accomplish your goal, whatever it may be, you have to get started, you have to move forward and you also have to overcome these limiting beliefs in order to successfully do so.
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: So in part two, we're going to dive into some beliefs that can keep us stuck in stagnant when we're trying to build and we're trying to grow.
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: This is very different from when we're starting, but they still present themselves, these limiting beliefs, and we are going to find ways to overcome them.
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: So you continue to reach your goals.
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: I want you to join me here again for the next episode of the Black Girls Consult Two podcast and I will look forward to talking to you again soon.
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: Okay, take care and don't forget to visit excelaconsultingcom for more information to support your consulting journey.
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: Until next time, take care.