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EP 59: SOLO - How Identity Shapes Your Story · Crafted Connections

• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Hello, hello, welcome to Crafted Connections.
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_00: I am Keelan Calhoun and we are here to tell stories.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: We are here to capture our story.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_00: We are here to share it with the world, right?
• 0:16
  SPEAKER_00: I am so happy that you have decided to hit play.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_00: I've been doing this podcast.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: We bring people on, we talk about their story, we talk about a lot of marketing things, and then I jump on for solos about how to tell your story, how to share story, like how story can be structured, incorporate story in the marketing and the business that we do.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: So I have a background in video production and I've been doing visual storytelling for over 10 years.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_00: And frankly, my brain just kind of works in story.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: It's, you know, I'll get lost on the way to the grocery store, but you tell me something specific about your life and your story, and I'm gonna remember it forever.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: So that's where we're at.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: Today I got a solo for you that I'm super, super excited about.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna dig into identity and how it fits into telling your story, how it fits into building a life that you want.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: So the idea of exploring identity came from last week's episode with my little sister Caroline Calhoun.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: She is in a big life transition.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: Frankly, it's mirroring my own experience of a current life transition.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: And I think we forget that our identity is so important to us, right?
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: We it it can also make or break us.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: If we are so tightly wound and connected to a certain experience or a certain identity, then we lose possibilities and experiences.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: If you have done any self-development work ever or at all, you know that people start with the like, what do you want?
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: What do you want?
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_00: And then who is the person who has that experience, right?
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm not I'm not a mindset coach, but I do believe that the stories we tell ourselves impact our reality.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: So with that being said, I want to talk story in that sense today.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: When it comes down to actually sharing your story, if you don't have like a clear idea about like how you want to be perceived, how you want to even identify yourself, it gets really, really lost in the sauce.
• 2:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm actually in real time working on that.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_00: So once you kind of figure out who's the person that experiences what you want, I have found exploring the question, how are you already connected to this?
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_00: You may be closer than you realize.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: Hey y'all.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: You know I love telling stories, gathering stories, and finding a way to help people connect their story with the people that will get it.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what my story strategy sessions are all about.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: So over at Calhoun Creative Consulting, my strategic storytelling firm, we do one-on-one and or facilitated workshops in relation to really honing in the strategy around your story.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's a bit of messaging, meets content creation, meets storytelling, and then how do we put that out in the world?
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: How do we show up regularly?
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: There's a bit of mindset work around it, right?
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: To actually tell your story.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: Whether you're launching something new or trying to rework your brand or just feeling a little foggy on how to communicate with your people, this is how to get clear.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: We'll dig into things like your narrative, how to uncover what matters most, maybe map out a few content pillars while we're at it.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: You'll also get a recording of our session so you can revisit the conversation anytime you like.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: Let's shape a story that actually feels like you.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_00: So book yours today.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: There is a link in the show notes.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: And hey, while you're at it, use the code podcast, all caps, podcast for 25% off your session.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: I would be honored to spend time with you and suss out your story.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: Let's dive back into the episode, shall we?
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: So let's back it up a little bit.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: Like I said, to share your actual story, to actually connect with people, starting with you.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: When I work with clients, I start there.
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_00: I say, okay, like what do we want people to actually think about you?
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: When you come to mind, what is the association, right?
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: And ultimately, when it comes to like looking in the mirror, it's your own identity.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: How do you identify?
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: How do you want to identify?
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_00: I have a perfect example of this in my early career.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_00: So I in my early 20s, under my belt, I had, you know, a degree in film and video.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_00: I had a few projects in my portfolio.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: I was very much video production career or bust, filmmaker or bust.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: So I had this goal, and I'm like looking at it and I'm like, that's future, that's future, that's future.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: And I identified with like this future version of myself as a filmmaker.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: And it was probably between like age 22 and like 28 that I went through this experience.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_00: So like a good six-year period, if I'm doing math correctly there.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_00: I kept being like, I just want to be a filmmaker, I just want to be a filmmaker, I just want to be a filmmaker.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I was taking the actions, right?
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: I was, I was applying to grants, I was producing my own projects, I was, you know, taking that creative time, putting things out there, marketing myself as such.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: But it it like, it had to be like, I had almost like, I hate the phrase fake it till I make it, but a little bit fake it till I make it.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: Like I changed my Instagram bio, I um introduced myself as such.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: I wrote any bio that was requested for like opportunities or grants was always like, she's a filmmaker, she's a filmmaker.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: But internally, I just wasn't identifying with that.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, I just want that, I just want that.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: And then it wasn't until like I was journaling one morning, probably in like 2021.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_00: I was journaling and I was like, I just want to be a filmmaker, I just want to be a filmmaker.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: Mind you, in that journaling session, out came the realization that I was currently working on my third funded film, right?
• 5:57
  SPEAKER_00: So my third short film was in production at the time, and I literally was like fundraising for it.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_00: So I had a grant for this film, I had had grants and funding for two other films prior to that, and I was literally actively a filmmaker.
• 6:13
  SPEAKER_00: Not only just a filmmaker by making film, but I was externally validated as such.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: But I didn't believe it, right?
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't believe it, even though it was literally my reality.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_00: And so I find this to be very interesting, right?
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's like the shift from identity of this is what I want to oh gosh, this is actually who I am.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_00: And not only who I am, like by doing the actions, right?
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_00: A filmmaker by like separate the two words, you're making films, that exists, right?
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: If you're if you are actively making a film, even you haven't finished a film, right?
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_00: And and so like I'm getting really loose with the definition here, but it's because we gotta give ourselves credit.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: I think we put parameters around it, right?
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: It's like younger me was like, oh, I want to be a filmmaker, and then I saw things coming out in the box office, and like maybe that was like what in my mind I thought I was trying to get to, and forgetting that I was like kind of already on the journey, already in the moment.
• 7:09
  SPEAKER_00: So this is a long-winded way to say what experience do you want to have?
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_00: And is there like a way that you can like bridge yourself to that now?
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: Is there a way you can identify with it now that very much is based in reality and not too crazy, not too all over the place?
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: I think you might find that that is true.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: You can you can find a way to to identify with something ever so slightly.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm working really hard on bridging myself to what my next reality is.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: And in this moment, I am having some trouble like figuring out where are we going next.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_00: We transitioned into this part-time boat life thing in 2024.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: And so we are entering our third summer season on the boat, and I uh as I'm packing up this winter rental, as I'm collecting my thoughts, as I'm thinking about like what is the future for this.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna be honest with you, I don't know.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I don't know.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know what it's gonna look like.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know exactly what I want, but I know I'm gonna keep trying things that feel good.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: I know I'm going to keep checking out identities that like feel good to me.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and potentially maybe I lost that a little bit over the last few years.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: I think you can simultaneously hold on to something way too tightly, and then you lose like the actual flow of what potential identities or what potential experiences you do want.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: And so what does feel good to me right now is being a part-time boat dweller.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_00: I know this summer I'm looking forward to the next six months on the boat and creating stories and sharing what's going on with our experiences.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, next week you'll meet Jennifer Magnley.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: She is an amazing human that I met in Indianapolis.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, our kind of our histories of navigating our careers intertwine in such a fun way.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_00: And I love there's a quote that she says in the episode about people don't really care if you succeed, they just want to see you try.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm kind of identifying with that a lot.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: That feels very nourishing as well.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_00: And all this to say I am proud of myself for the daily exploration and recognizing that maybe I was a little bit too harsh about past identities.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_00: Let's return to the filmmaker example.
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: I post that experience still identify as a filmmaker.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: That third film I was talking about, it's produced, people still enjoy it to this day.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_00: But I finished it five years ago.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: And I think a harsher thought would be to say, Oh, I'm not a filmmaker anymore.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: But in the same way that while you're making a film, you are a filmmaker.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: I have made films.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: So I am a filmmaker.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: I am someone who has made films.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a filmmaker.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: Just kidding, I'm not gonna say it that way.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_00: But but I I want to encourage people when they when they have something they want and they're like, cool, but I'm not that person who gets that thing.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're actually closer than you think.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: And if you, you know, there's former versions of yourself that you want to reconnect with, like you were that person once, you can explore it again.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: To bring it all back to story, you have to figure out the story you want to tell and deciding who the character is, learning and in meeting the character of the story.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's a really important step, and especially in your own story.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_00: So, with that, go out there and be who you want to be.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_00: Take it on, figure it out.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: You can do it.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: It is it is a process.
• 10:56
  SPEAKER_00: And I just I'm kind of realizing more and more that like destinations are not actually a thing.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: You know, there's goals, there's benchmarks, but like the actual once you get there, you move the bar.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_00: So how do you enjoy the experience?
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_00: How do you live in the identity of who you want to be?
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: Think about it.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_00: Let me know what you think.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: If you enjoyed this episode or any of the episodes, please board them to a friend.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_00: I want people to feel good about themselves.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_00: I want them to feel confident sharing who they are, whether that be one-on-one or on the interwebs.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I hope that this episode today has helped you kind of identify a little bit more with yourself or inspired you to take some time to get to know yourself or get to know who you want to be and then and then lean into that.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_00: Appreciate you.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: Have a great week.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: Crafted Connections is lovingly produced by Calhoun Creative Consulting, a strategic storytelling firm dedicated to helping people and brands tell their stories in a way that resonates.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe and connect with us on Instagram at Crafted Connections Bot.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_00: Keep creating, keep connecting, until we meet again.