Latest / Celeste The Therapist / EP 514 The Power of Disciplined Consumption: Shifting Your Mindset for Better Mental Health
Transcript
- 0:02Hey, thank you all so much for joining another episode of Celeste, the therapist
- 0:05podcast. My name is Celeste. I'm a therapist from Boston. If you've never been
- 0:08into my podcast before, I appreciate you for giving me a
- 0:12try. What we do on this podcast is I talk about issues
- 0:15that we go through, and I help you think about ways you can
- 0:19work through them. My whole platform and the premise of what
- 0:23I talk about is helping you shift the way you think Because
- 0:27we can get stuck in some faulty thinking And
- 0:30I realize like a lot of us are so used
- 0:33to just surviving life. We don't recognize like how
- 0:36we can work on living life And there are some things that
- 0:40we can do that we don't recognize Oh, if I just change the way i'm doing
- 0:43this or if I just change my exposure to this It
- 0:47can really help me shift my mindset, right? So
- 0:50today we're talking about the consumption what you consume One
- 0:54of the things I do if you've been listening to this for a while. I love listening to motivational
- 0:58videos I look at it as my medicine and I
- 1:01was listening to I can't think of his name right now myron something
- 1:06And one of the things he talked about as creating change
- 1:09is the consumption of what we consume. So we're
- 1:13just going to jump right into it. And if you are listening
- 1:17to me on audio, don't forget these episodes are
- 1:21on YouTube. I create visuals. So
- 1:24if you want to follow along, if you want to make this part of your Wellness
- 1:28journey right these podcasts I'm talking about very short to
- 1:31the point to help you with the way
- 1:35that you're operating so one of the words that he used was
- 1:38discipline consumption and How that can
- 1:41help people with their habits, right? And so that
- 1:45was one of the things that he shared and I just wanted
- 1:48to break specifically discipline consumption down because
- 1:51I recognize people may not realize exactly how
- 1:55the way that they're consuming things could be affecting their mental health, right?
- 2:01So what is discipline consumption? So in the context of mental health
- 2:05and well-being, it's the mindful, intentional approach to
- 2:08what we consume in life. Including not only material goods,
- 2:12but experiences and activities, right? Obviously like
- 2:15food is something we consume. I feel like that's another topic just really
- 2:20quick This is not a part of my podcast, but what you
- 2:23eat as well can affect your mental health brain fog all
- 2:26of these things So really be mindful of it. That's a podcast by
- 2:30itself that I want to create Where I'm talking about like
- 2:33the foods and things that you're eating moving your body like
- 2:37it matters today. We're talking about conversations,
- 2:41what you're exposing yourself to, right? Because a lot of times we
- 2:44don't realize like, oh, I'm having these conversations with my coworkers even
- 2:47after work, talking about all the hard things that have happened at work,
- 2:51not recognizing like you're just allowing yourself to stay in that space
- 2:55mentally, right? You could leave work and still find yourself
- 2:58consumed by work, right? So this idea of disciplined
- 3:02consumption, I hope that if you have been struggling
- 3:05with some of the ways that you're feeling and thinking, It'll
- 3:09help you think about well, like what is it that I'm consuming when
- 3:12I'm struggling I check in with myself Okay, what am I doing? I
- 3:16know if I watch a movie like I'll look at what the movie's about
- 3:20I don't like watching sad stuff I just don't I'm not saying like you
- 3:23can't watch that me personally I know what my limitations
- 3:27are and I won't watch the movie and if I do watch something in
- 3:30a scene or something catches me off guard I can really feel it and how I
- 3:34feel and I work on changing my algorithm by watching something
- 3:37funny So the forms of
- 3:40consumption, media, like what we're watching, what we're seeing,
- 3:44conversations and self-talk, right?
- 3:48So your consumption of information and perspectives happen
- 3:52in these various forms. So I want you to be mindful of
- 3:55these forms of consumption. I'm gonna talk about how they affect
- 3:59us, right? I'm gonna break it down. So the media consumption,
- 4:03right? What you're watching on TV, what you
- 4:07are looking at on social media. So there's
- 4:11visual and audio influence, right? So the content we assume through
- 4:14television, movies, and music can create strong emotions.
- 4:19I just post, you know, someone's like, oh, you don't go on
- 4:22your stories as much on Instagram. I'm actually busy too. One
- 4:25of the things is I'm busy, but also, Social media
- 4:29is, I mean, what's happening around the world is hard. There's a lot of hard news.
- 4:33And as much as I try to curate my feed, sometimes
- 4:36things come up. And I can feel it in my spirit,
- 4:40like, especially one of the things I don't like, I don't like bullies. And
- 4:43there's a lot happening in America that I feel like is very bullying behavior.
- 4:49When I say there's nothing I can do about it meaning I can't change it overnight And
- 4:53also I just want people to be mindful too. Like there's so much going on.
- 4:56We can't Save the world by ourselves. We can't put our
- 5:00hands in everything So what I look at what i'm doing as
- 5:03i'm working with mental health and helping people shift their thought
- 5:07process. I look at my My platform and what
- 5:10I do is part of the solution right sometimes what
- 5:14you do to help is take care of yourself right being of
- 5:18sound mind right there's just so much happening but the
- 5:21the things that we're watching if we're not mindful we
- 5:25can find ourselves being um emotionally
- 5:28responding to all the things that we're seeing um
- 5:32i just seen a post uh there's a psychologist i love
- 5:35dr judith Joseph and she was sharing
- 5:39about this study that um she was
- 5:42on another podcast she's so lucky and she was sharing a
- 5:45study about how when they took people's phones
- 5:49away for two weeks They took people's phones away
- 5:52for two weeks their joy like their joy Numbers
- 5:56are because they don't really they was talking about that experience the joy started to rise
- 6:00Right because they're not being consumed by all of this stuff that's happening. They're
- 6:03making connections. They're in nature so really
- 6:07being mindful of how much social media you're consuming even
- 6:10if it's not about it being bad news just sitting on your phone and
- 6:14all day, in between the moments you have, not
- 6:17really enjoy your food, not really allowing the sun
- 6:21to hit you, that's a problem. Another way
- 6:24media consumption can influence us, so
- 6:27normalization of behavior. So media often portrays certain behaviors
- 6:31as normal or acceptable. Being mindful, a
- 6:34lot of Teenagers are a lot some 42 And
- 6:39and I didn't grow up with social media social media social Facebook came
- 6:42out when I was in college And I think that a
- 6:46lot of the shows and things that people are seeing Because you
- 6:49see them so much you get desensitized and they feel normal The
- 6:53way that they show a crime or people
- 6:57go live and somebody just got shot or something, right?
- 7:01People get so desensitized to it. I haven't been desensitized. Like
- 7:05that stuff really makes me sad. I think about the
- 7:08people's families. And so there's a lot of ways
- 7:12that when you are over consuming certain media,
- 7:16The behavior starts to feel seem normal like being depressed
- 7:20or I think about and I'm not knocking church But
- 7:24I grew up in church. I think about certain like
- 7:27churches how Being poor or not having nothing
- 7:31people it just becomes normal like as if they're not supposed to
- 7:35Have wealth or or have joy, right? It's the the
- 7:38um the way that the the wealth or
- 7:41like you see the pastors and and stuff with these like nice
- 7:45cars and everybody in the sanctuary kind of suffering and
- 7:48i'm not saying this is all churches but there's this normalization
- 7:52of behaviors that take place When
- 7:55we consume certain media over and over again, so be mindful I
- 7:59like I'll watch a reality TV show but I
- 8:03know that that is a Reality TV show and there's a
- 8:06lot going on behind the scenes and what we see is not always
- 8:09what it is Like I'm conscious of that Sometimes if you're
- 8:12watching this stuff, you're not conscious of that you're seeing the
- 8:16girl get the 50 roses and roses aren't cheap
- 8:20and then you don't realize you may have an attitude with your partner because they
- 8:23never got you a rose right so being mindful of
- 8:28recognizing what you're consuming, how is it making you
- 8:31feel? And then these cognitive patterns, right?
- 8:34So repeated exposure to specific themes or narratives
- 8:38can create cognitive biases. So this example, it says,
- 8:41if someone is constantly exposed to negative portrayals of certain groups or situations,
- 8:45it may shape their beliefs, attitudes towards those groups leading to
- 8:49stereotypes or prejudices. I
- 8:52grew up watching Law and Order, Matlock, those
- 8:57like kind of crime shows right and um
- 9:00it it was like normal for the police to press for stuff because
- 9:04we're like oh they're guilty right we know they're guilty it
- 9:07wasn't until all of the things came out and a
- 9:10lot of people have already been aware i didn't understand systemic racism
- 9:14until i got to college in my africana studies class like i
- 9:17literally literally was oblivious to it Now, when
- 9:21I'm watching, if I'm watching like a law and order or those like
- 9:24Chicago, like those Chicago blues or, and they're roughing
- 9:28up somebody, I immediately like get pissed off. Before I
- 9:31never used to get pissed off because I seen it so much, it was just normal.
- 9:35But then I recognized like, this isn't normal. This is why there's so much stereotypes that
- 9:39take place in the black, within the black community, not
- 9:42just with outside races, but even with our own race, like there's so much
- 9:47biases that take place, when people look
- 9:51a certain way or move a certain way or have certain clothes on, we
- 9:54don't realize it's because they normalize that those are the criminals in
- 9:58these certain shows, right? So my mind
- 10:01is so aware of how certain things are portrayed and
- 10:04how it may not be fair. Now
- 10:08conversations, right? So we just talked about how media can affect
- 10:11you. Let's talk about the conversations that you're having with people,
- 10:15right? So social influences of social interactions.
- 10:18So the conversations we're having with friends, families, colleagues can
- 10:22significantly impact our self-perception and emotional state. So
- 10:26on both ends, it's not just a negative way it can affect us, because it
- 10:30can affect us positive ways. And also, let me just be clear with the media stuff.
- 10:34I kind of like hit on like the ways it can affect you negatively, but
- 10:38I listen to motivational videos almost every day. I send
- 10:42quotes to people. I send things that stick out for me. Those
- 10:46things that I'm listening, they have an effect, but they have a positive effect
- 10:49where it's making me feel like I can conquer my day. It's making me
- 10:53feel that like, um, this day is going to be great when I start my
- 10:56day that way. Right. So not only does the media can affect you
- 10:59in a negative way, it can also affect you in a positive way. Obviously my podcast, my
- 11:03platform. I talk about mental health, I talk about ways you can shift your thinking.
- 11:06So obviously, there's positive effects of
- 11:10the media. And the same with conversations, what we're getting into.
- 11:13So self-perception, emotional state. So positive
- 11:17supportive conversations can boost your self-esteem and encourage personal
- 11:21growth, while negative or critical conversations can lead
- 11:24to self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy. right
- 11:28so being mindful when you talk to certain people I you know
- 11:32my circle is a lot smaller than it was before but I
- 11:35recognize now that I'm older and I can look back how certain people
- 11:38the things they would say would affect me in a certain way and not
- 11:42realizing how I'm feeling because it's based off of what they've
- 11:45said I can't help what people say but I can
- 11:49be mindful on how much engagement I have with them. I
- 11:52started off this podcast saying like when people are at
- 11:55work talking about, oh, all the toxic stuff that's happened and then you leave
- 11:59work, you call and talking about it, you're keeping yourself in that space, not
- 12:02realizing that this conversation is affecting me
- 12:06in a negative way. Now let's say you find a group,
- 12:09let's say you want to become an entrepreneur and you find a group that's
- 12:13doing things, you'll be surprised. Being in that group of
- 12:17entrepreneurs will help influence you and
- 12:20it will help you feel like, you know what, I can do this. So the
- 12:24conversations you're having with people, being mindful how
- 12:27they can lead you into this way of opportunity and
- 12:31growth or to stagnation and poor self-esteem. Another
- 12:35way conversations can affect you is emotional contagion.
- 12:39So emotions can be contagious, engaging with people who are
- 12:42consistently negative or pessimistic can drain their energy. And
- 12:46then obviously, if you're talking to people that are positive, when people
- 12:49talk to me, they always say like, dang, I feel so motivated, I feel this.
- 12:52You know, when you listen to my podcast, my platform is meant to encourage
- 12:56you, to empower you. So like those kinds of conversations I
- 12:59have with people are typically empowering and encouraging. Now
- 13:03be mindful of the ones that are draining. You ever get off the phone with somebody and
- 13:07you're like, oh my God, I feel so tired. You may not even realize that I'm constantly
- 13:10bringing this awareness to people when I work with them about, it's
- 13:14not that those people are bad, but you've allowed yourself to
- 13:17be a dumping ground, right?
- 13:20Where they know if I call Celeste, she gonna listen, right? And
- 13:24then you might've had 10, 15, 11 things to do and
- 13:27you find yourself draining when you get off the phone. Conversations that
- 13:31you have with people can encourage you motivate you or
- 13:35it can drain you and I'm not saying those people that may be
- 13:38draining I'm not saying cut them off or don't talk to them because some of
- 13:41them could be your kid right or your friend what
- 13:45I'm saying is be aware of what you're
- 13:48feeling and and what you're doing with them because a lot
- 13:51of times we stay in these states with people
- 13:55and we don't recognize how we're affected and if you're really cool with them it's
- 13:59okay to be like hey you know I realize like we're always talking
- 14:02about work right we're on vacation how about we like leave work
- 14:06at work you might be able to encourage them to get out of their own way Instead
- 14:10of it just being, well, this is how Celeste is. Don't be telling people this is just how I
- 14:13am. Come tell me that you're struggling with how I'm
- 14:16communicating and that I'm draining you. I would rather know. And
- 14:20if it's a meaningful relationship, I think it's important to
- 14:24let people know, because they don't know. If you've always allowed yourself to
- 14:27be available, that's all they know of you. But if you say,
- 14:31and it's not a bad thing, if you say something like, I
- 14:34recognize that, you're always saying
- 14:39hard things about work and it seems like it's draining
- 14:42and I know I get overwhelmed by it. Have you thought about like
- 14:46maybe like let's just talk about work for 10 minutes and then let's
- 14:49just leave it there right because what we engage in
- 14:52and what we consume will consume our mind. Our mind can only go at the direction
- 14:56that we take it. And we don't recognize that our mind is only going at
- 14:59the direction we take it. So if we're on reality TV and social media
- 15:02all day, our mind is only going at that direction, right? If
- 15:05we're listening to Celeste's Therapist podcast, if we're listening to
- 15:09all these amazing motivational speakers, if
- 15:12we're in nature, right? If we are working on our goals,
- 15:16our mind is gonna go at the direction that we're taking it, right? We
- 15:19have more power than we realize. We just have to start to have
- 15:23faith and start to believe in ourselves. The last thing about conversations I
- 15:26want to say is conversations often reinforce our existing beliefs
- 15:30and attitudes. Unfortunately, like
- 15:33now, you can believe anything that's like crazy,
- 15:37somebody's gonna believe it with you, right? Being mindful
- 15:41on like what you believe in, make sure it's what you want and
- 15:44not what society says, right? My thing is if you're
- 15:47not harming anybody, you're not harming yourself or others, like
- 15:51allow the thoughts and stuff to flow and see where it
- 15:54takes you, but being mindful, That is your
- 15:58stuff and not someone else's stuff. The only way to do that is to really spend
- 16:01some time alone, right? We struggle with being alone, but I
- 16:05promise you it's helpful to spend some time alone so you can really
- 16:08know, is this me or is this my culture? Is this my family? Is this
- 16:11what my mom and my daddy want me to do? Or is this what I really want to do, right?
- 16:15So these are some ways in which the
- 16:18conversations can affect us. And again, it can
- 16:22go in a positive direction or a negative direction. And
- 16:26then the last thing is, oh, we just talked about
- 16:29the normalization of behaviors. Yeah,
- 16:35we just talked about that. So the forms of, oh,
- 16:38wait, no, I'm going backwards. Hold on, give me one second, guys. Let
- 16:42me go to the next one. media consumption we
- 16:46talked about that one all right and
- 16:49then we talked about conversations and then the next one the
- 16:53last one is self-talk this is so important y'all know why this is so
- 16:56important you with yourself 24 7 of course this is
- 16:59so important like your your voice and the dialogue you
- 17:03have with yourself it matters So the way we talk to ourself
- 17:06can have a profound impact on our mental health. For me, my self-talk
- 17:10is positive. Even when I screw up, I'm like, all right, Celeste, it's okay, you got this. I'm
- 17:14constantly talking to myself in a positive way. So
- 17:17cognitive behavioral patterns, Our thoughts influence
- 17:21our feelings and behaviors. If we consistently engage in
- 17:24negative talk, it can lead to a cycle of negative emotions and
- 17:28unproductive behavior. Conversely, practicing positive affirmations,
- 17:31constructive self-talk can help break the cycle and promote healthier behaviors.
- 17:35Why are you feeling stuck? You may ask the action stuff. What are you saying to
- 17:39yourself? I'm constantly reframing even in real time
- 17:42when I'm working with people. Wait, can you say that again? And so they'd be like dang that
- 17:45didn't sound right It doesn't sound right and guess what that's what you're saying
- 17:49to yourself all the time If you could just see it callously and say it to me. I
- 17:52know when you're by yourself. That's how you're talking and Change happens
- 17:56with making a decision to change but if even in your mind
- 17:59you're blowing that decision and telling yourself It's not gonna work. How
- 18:03are you gonna make that change? Remember your mind goes at the pace that you take it.
- 18:06Where are you taking your mind? Right. Are you tell what are you telling
- 18:10yourself? And then the next thing I
- 18:13want to say is mindset shifts, right? Shifting the way you
- 18:16think, baby, that's what we're doing over here. So by consciously changing
- 18:20our self-talk, we can shift our mindset from a fixed perspective, believing
- 18:24our abilities are static, to a growth mindset,
- 18:28believing we can develop our abilities. This shift
- 18:31can lead to increased motivation and willingness to embrace challenges. When
- 18:35I tell y'all we are malleable, we can change just
- 18:38because we were brought up a certain way, just because we were exposed
- 18:42to certain things, just because we've been through certain things, doesn't mean
- 18:46that we can't create change. We can absolutely create change, but
- 18:49I recognize it starts with our mind. It starts with
- 18:53what we are consuming, what we are allowing in our mind is so important.
- 18:58The last thing I'll say about this, right? Cause I'm
- 19:01all about like, how do we change that? Media, right?
- 19:05So I said media conversations and self-talk. If you're following
- 19:08me on YouTube, you can see it on the screen. So start curating your
- 19:11social media feeds and choose uplifting content, right? Be mindful
- 19:16of what you are consuming. Even if you're not ready to do
- 19:19that yet and curate your feed, pay attention to
- 19:23what's coming up for you when you're watching this stuff. Conversations be
- 19:27intentional on engaging conversations that inspire and uplift you and
- 19:30set boundaries with negative influence So if your co-worker wants
- 19:33to keep talking about work after work, hey, it's five o'clock, baby
- 19:37We are we off like let's go have a drink. Let's go for a walk Let's
- 19:40leave work at work until you make that decision to be
- 19:44intentional on what you engage in people will constantly consume
- 19:47you with the negative talk right and you will constantly feel
- 19:51like you're drained and not realize it and self-talk, be
- 19:55intentional about positive self-talk and affirmations. When
- 19:58I tell you like you're with yourself 24-7, Believe
- 20:03that listen to what I'm saying. It's not a lie. You are with yourself all
- 20:06the time And so if you can't talk life into
- 20:09your life, right? How you expect for change to
- 20:13happen right change is gonna happen But
- 20:17it starts with you. It can't it's not about your past. We
- 20:20can't change our past. It's not about what somebody's not doing We can't
- 20:23make them do anything It's gonna start up here. So
- 20:27I hope that was helpful. I hope that makes sense. If you're new here,
- 20:30if you're in the Boston area, Stoughton area, I
- 20:34have a wellness center. We have three regular classes that
- 20:37take place once a month. We have mindful yen, we have
- 20:41a restorative yoga, and we have a rest and restore. If
- 20:45you go to STWYT, you can find it. This
- 20:48month, we are going to have two new classes. We
- 20:52are going to have a trauma-informed yoga
- 20:56session, and you can find out the details on stwyt.com. That
- 21:00is happening Saturday, June 14th at 10 a.m. And
- 21:04then at the end of the month, we're gonna have a sound healing class
- 21:07with Jillian Miller. And if you're not familiar with trauma-informed
- 21:12yoga, it can help you with your nervous support system,
- 21:16body awareness. It's an empowered space, right? This
- 21:20is a visual on YouTube. I'm reading it for people that are listening. And
- 21:23then for a sound healing, right, the
- 21:28frequencies and the way that it flows with
- 21:31this type of somatic work can help you
- 21:35with your anxiety. It can have your system. create
- 21:38this calmness and focus, right? So one
- 21:42of the things, I created this wellness center. Again, I have a practice
- 21:46where I have clinicians under me, but what my main focus
- 21:50has been with creating this is these somatic classes. I
- 21:53want us to get into our body. I want us to not just like think
- 21:57about or intellectualize what we need. I want us to like
- 22:00allow our body to give itself what it needs, right? And
- 22:04so that's why I created it. Black owned, women owned,
- 22:07right? So, you know, you can come here and feel comfortable and
- 22:11know like this space is for you So if you are curious about
- 22:14any of the classes that I do or have questions Go to
- 22:17my website stwy t.com follow me on all social
- 22:21media platforms at Celeste the therapist email us at
- 22:24the Wellness Center is info at stwy t.com
- 22:28again, that's info at stwy t.com and And
- 22:32until next time, beautiful people. Oh yeah, also, I have two books. If
- 22:36you're watching me on YouTube, you can see I have this guided
- 22:40journal called 365 Days of Intentional Living. And
- 22:43I also have this book called Relationship Goals.
- 22:47It's a guide to a healthy relationship. You can find those books
- 22:51in the classes and information about me at either stwyt.com, that's
- 22:55my wellness center, or you can go to my website, celestatherapist.com.