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What Has Life Given Me with Yosi Amram, PhD · The Trauma Therapist

0:00
Speaker 1: Welcome to the Trauma THEAPIS podcast. My name is Gamcpherson.
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Speaker 1: I interview incredible people who dedicated their lives to helping
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Speaker 1: those who have been impacted by trauma. Here we go,
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Speaker 1: So five four, three, two and one, our folks, welcome
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Speaker 1: back to the podcast. Very excited to happ as my
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Speaker 1: guest today, Doctor yos amram jos Welcome.
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Speaker 2: Thank you Gray.
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Speaker 3: I'm delighted to be with you and enjoying your smile
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Speaker 3: right now.
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Speaker 1: I appreciate that. So. Doctor Emrem is a licensed clinical psychologist,
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Speaker 1: a CEO leadership coach, and a best selling and award
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Speaker 1: winning author. He's a pioneer researcher in the field of
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Speaker 1: spiritual intelligence whose research has received over one thousand citations.
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Speaker 1: As an Amazon best selling author of the book titled
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Speaker 1: Spiritually Intelligent Leadership, How to Inspire by Being Inspired, which
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Speaker 1: won the Nautilist' Book Award Gold Medal. Yosi is committed
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Speaker 1: to awakening greater spiritual intelligence in himself and the world.
1:00
Speaker 1: All right, you see just a small bit about you
1:02
Speaker 1: before we could going and share with our listeners where
1:05
Speaker 1: you're from originally and where you are currently.
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Speaker 3: Originally from across the Big pond in Israel. I grew
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Speaker 3: up in Israel, a war torn part of the world,
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Speaker 3: which is right now going through some horrific situation. But
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Speaker 3: I grew up and had the I don't know what
1:26
Speaker 3: to say that, the privilege, the horror of having to
1:31
Speaker 3: serve in the military, but fortunately it was peaceful time.
1:34
Speaker 3: So but that was a very impactful period in my
1:37
Speaker 3: life that led me to the interest in leadership and
1:39
Speaker 3: then got me to start some companies, etc. But then
1:44
Speaker 3: I shifted my life and career. Now in the West
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Speaker 3: coast of California in San Francisco Bay Area near Santa Cruz,
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Speaker 3: and I'm a psychologist and a therapist in addition to
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Speaker 3: a leadership coach.
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Speaker 1: SOOT talk about the shift and specifically spirituality and how
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Speaker 1: and when that came into your life and what it means.
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Speaker 1: How are we defining that?
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Speaker 3: Okay, great, hopefully I won't take the whole podcast to
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Speaker 3: but yeah, just going back a little bit. So, I
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Speaker 3: served in the military. I started as a math and
2:25
Speaker 3: science nerd kid, but to my we was shy and introverter.
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Speaker 3: But to my surprise, I won all these military leadership awards,
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Speaker 3: but the military chafed it. My soul as a command
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Speaker 3: and control model, which is necessarily and effective in battle,
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Speaker 3: but not inspiring the best and bringing people to their best.
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Speaker 3: So that led me to my lifelong dream of building
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Speaker 3: an organization based on more humanistic principles, which got me
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Speaker 3: to be the founder and CEO of a couple of
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Speaker 3: tech companies. I had the good fortune of taking both
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Speaker 3: of them public, but along the way I was overly
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Speaker 3: driven and identified with the business, and I got experience
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Speaker 3: what you might call a dark knight of the soul
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Speaker 3: or clinically it was more of a depression. But out
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Speaker 3: of that, through my persistence, et cetera, I had this mystical,
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Speaker 3: you might say, magical experience of an awakening while receiving
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Speaker 3: a massage, getting relaxed and so on, and my ego
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Speaker 3: dissolved and I experienced my interconnected oneness and looking through
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Speaker 3: the face cradle, I felt like and saw that the
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Speaker 3: floor was really inside of me. So that dissolved sort
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Speaker 3: of this normal frame that I look at the world
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Speaker 3: where we're all separate beings here and there. I'm here,
3:44
Speaker 3: it's all separate objects, and that kind of blew the
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Speaker 3: circuits of my mind and threw me into a manic
3:50
Speaker 3: episode in addition to the spiritual awakening, which led to
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Speaker 3: my significant trauma because I was the founder, CEO, chairman
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Speaker 3: of the public company that I started, but I kind
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Speaker 3: of lost grounding in the midst of it and got
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Speaker 3: my board to push me out, put me on a
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Speaker 3: quote unquote voluntary leave of absence they called it. There
4:12
Speaker 3: was nothing voluntary about it, but I lost my baby,
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Speaker 3: and that led me to ask the questions what happened?
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Speaker 3: Why was I so identified with the business, Why did
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Speaker 3: I burn myself out? What was this experience of awakening?
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Speaker 2: Was it real? Was a delusion?
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Speaker 3: And that got me to go back and get a
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Speaker 3: PhD in clinical psychology. And then I discovered the term
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Speaker 3: spiritual intelligence, which I was excited by because I knew
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Speaker 3: about emotional intelligence and all the benefits that it had,
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Speaker 3: but nobody really operationally defined what spiritual intelligence is and
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Speaker 3: how to measure it, which you need to do in
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Speaker 3: order to study it. So that's the path I set
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Speaker 3: on to do, and that was my doctoral research and
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Speaker 3: defining it, looking at what it is, how to measure it,
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Speaker 3: and then looking at how it contributes the leadership and
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Speaker 3: a variety of other positive outcomes.
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Speaker 1: All right, Hang on a second. So you you just
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Speaker 1: in a matter of two minutes, covered a whole span
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Speaker 1: of incredible depth and and and years. So wow, let
5:18
Speaker 1: me just jump back to being in the military. You
5:24
Speaker 1: found yourself as a very strong leader, and you mentioned
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Speaker 1: the word soul. There was soul in there. What what?
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Speaker 3: I was chafed at my soul? It's it's a soul
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Speaker 3: crushing environment.
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Speaker 1: I see, I see. Yeah.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, So even though I was good at it, I
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Speaker 2: didn't like it.
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Speaker 1: What did What were you connecting in that role? How
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Speaker 1: are you connecting in that role as a leader.
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Speaker 2: That's a good question.
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Speaker 3: Uh well, one thing that I learned is the name
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Speaker 3: orance of both. Looking at the people that I found
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Speaker 3: the strong leaders that were inspiring, one of the qualities
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Speaker 3: they had is they had confidence in themselves and in
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Speaker 3: the people that they lead.
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Speaker 2: So they projected this idea that I believe in you.
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Speaker 3: I believed this, you could do a lot more than
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Speaker 3: you believe about yourself, and that inspires people to stretch themselves.
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Speaker 3: So I saw that in my regiment commander. It was
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Speaker 3: a very I don't remember his name, but his face
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Speaker 3: is planted in my psyche and his blue eyes he
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Speaker 3: was a short, medium built man, and so it taught
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Speaker 3: me one thing, which is the importance of believing in people.
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Speaker 3: So that that's one aspect. But you know, as I said,
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Speaker 3: the military, as a commander, you look at people as hardware.
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Speaker 3: I had to inspect their soul and their socks to
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Speaker 3: make sure they took their showers, whatever, because people were
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Speaker 3: so exhausted and.
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Speaker 2: Stretched, et cetera.
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Speaker 3: But that's dehumanizing, and so I felt that, you know,
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Speaker 3: there are beautiful aspects of it in terms of believing
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Speaker 3: in people, creating a sense of camaraderie and where people
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Speaker 3: you know, you hear stories with soldiers will jump on
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Speaker 3: a hand grenade that's exploding to protect their their friends,
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Speaker 3: so there's a real team building and connection. But there's
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Speaker 3: also soul crushing experiences that are dehumanizing. So all of
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Speaker 3: that kind of reflecting and massaging all of that in
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Speaker 3: my psyche led me to want to build an organization
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Speaker 3: that brings out the best in people as individuals, but
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Speaker 3: also still connects them in a community with a shared purpose,
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Speaker 3: which the military is good in installed instilling, because we're
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Speaker 3: all in this together, our survival depends on it. But
7:50
Speaker 3: in corporations, you know, you get a lot of politics
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Speaker 3: and toxicity and egos and so on. So how can
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Speaker 3: you build an organization that brings out the best in
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Speaker 3: each individual but still gives them a sense of identity
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Speaker 3: and belonging as part of a community with a shared
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Speaker 3: sense of purpose, mission, vision, and values.
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Speaker 2: So I hope I'm making sense.
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Speaker 1: You are you are, And let's kind of segue into
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Speaker 1: spiritual intelligence and the birth of that in you or
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Speaker 1: the awakening of that in you. What was resonating for
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Speaker 1: you about that?
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Speaker 3: Well, as I said, I had this spiritual awakening experience.
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Speaker 3: But even though I had this awakening experience, I wasn't
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Speaker 3: very grounded. I didn't integrate it into my life. So
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Speaker 3: you know, that created a spiritual opening. But this is
8:46
Speaker 3: the importance, like to understand the difference between spirituality and
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Speaker 3: spiritual intelligence, much like there's a difference between emotionality and
8:55
Speaker 3: emotional intelligence. If I asked you, guy, do you know
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Speaker 3: people in your life that are emotional? You probably could
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Speaker 3: think some, but it might not be the best most
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Speaker 3: complementary description. People that are emotional might be dramatic, they
9:10
Speaker 3: might be actually dysregulated, etc. But then emotional intelligence came
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Speaker 3: and bridge this dichotomy between emotion and reason, and we
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Speaker 3: can use emotions. So what is emotional intelligence is the
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Speaker 3: ability to draw on emotional information and resources to help
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Speaker 3: us function better. Now, if you look at the spiritual world,
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Speaker 3: you have a spiritual person, and that could be a
9:36
Speaker 3: spiritual belief system, you know, like I believe in God,
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Speaker 3: I believe in reincarnation of the soul, the eternity of
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Speaker 3: the soul, whatever those are belief system, and then you
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Speaker 3: have spiritual experiences. I could be walking in the woods
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Speaker 3: in the forest and I could feel one with nature,
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Speaker 3: I'm no longer a separate entity or whatever. That would
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Speaker 3: be an experience. I could be meditating, my ego dissolves,
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Speaker 3: I feel the space, someone would everything whatever. Those are experiences.
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Speaker 3: But what spiritual intelligence is interested in is how can
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Speaker 3: I then live my life drawing on spiritual qualities and resources.
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Speaker 3: So that's when I'm in a team meeting, instead of
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Speaker 3: getting my ego hooked and trying to prove myself right,
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Speaker 3: I am trying to do what is right. You know,
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Speaker 3: when I am in a discussion or an argument with
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Speaker 3: my partner's.
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Speaker 2: Spouse, the same thing.
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Speaker 3: How do I bring empathy and compassion connection forgiveness. When
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Speaker 3: I'm driving on the freeway, I'm in this metal box
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Speaker 3: called the car, which tends to make me feel like,
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Speaker 3: you know, I'm kind of shielded from everybody else, and
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Speaker 3: I'm in competition on how I get on and off
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Speaker 3: the freeway. So it's a very isolating and brings out
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Speaker 3: the worst in people. But you know, if I can
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Speaker 3: connect into my interconnectedness with all the other drivers on
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Speaker 3: the road who are also rushing to get home and
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Speaker 3: rush after work in rush hour whatever, then it comes
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Speaker 3: my nervous system and I feel connected and less isolated,
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Speaker 3: and it's more likely to all behave and in more
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Speaker 3: adaptive ways for me and for the group. So I'm
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Speaker 3: trying to highlight the difference between a spiritual belief, a
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Speaker 3: spiritual experience, and spiritual intelligence. So maybe I should still
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Speaker 3: define more succinctly what I mean by spiritual intelligence, because
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Speaker 3: I said emotional intelligence is the ability to draw on
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Speaker 3: emotional resources and information to help functioning and well being.
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Speaker 3: By analogies, spiritual intelligence is the ability to draw on
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Speaker 3: and embody spiritual qualities and resources to help functioning and
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Speaker 3: well being. So I'll pause there. Now you might say, well,
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Speaker 3: what are those spiritual qualities and resources, and those are
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Speaker 3: the qualities that are universal across all the world's traditions
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Speaker 3: for thousands of years, like purpose, service, trust, gratitude, humility, integrity, presence,
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Speaker 3: and so on. And so these qualities came out as
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Speaker 3: universal in my interviews with seventy one leaders and teachers
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Speaker 3: across all the world's traditions, regardless of their cosmology or theology,
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Speaker 3: whether they believed, you know, that Jesus was the Messiah
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Speaker 3: or Moses went up to the mountain when the Buddha
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Speaker 3: was enlightened, or that there is a self there is
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Speaker 3: no self, whatever it is their.
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Speaker 2: Cosmology, they believe that these are the virtues.
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Speaker 1: These are just okay, just quickly here. So what about
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Speaker 1: the belief in or the feeling that one is connected
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Speaker 1: to a higher power? Doesn't I mean, everything you mentioned,
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Speaker 1: what was it, empathy, humility, et cetera, to me doesn't
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Speaker 1: describe or define spirituality so much as that unique descriptor
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Speaker 1: which is that belief in a higher power or universality
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Speaker 1: or right. Isn't that what many of us think of
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Speaker 1: when we think of spirituality.
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Speaker 3: Well, some people think that, but I mean, in the
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Speaker 3: academic research I've seen and done. About defining spirituality, there
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Speaker 3: are essentially three themes. So you know, Buddhists are spiritual,
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Speaker 3: they don't necessarily believe in higher power. They they're agnostic
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Speaker 3: on that. So what spirituality generally refers to is the
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Speaker 3: interest in three things is the deepest meaning and dimensions
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Speaker 3: of life, and connection to the sacred and transcendent dimensions.
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Speaker 3: Now sacred and transcendent dimensions of life for somebody in
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Speaker 3: the theistic thing would be you might call higher power,
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Speaker 3: but in other traditions they might not language it like that.
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Speaker 2: But I think where you might have been.
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Speaker 3: Heading is that, yeah, these qualities are all nice, but
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Speaker 3: what's unifying to all of them? And so yeah, and
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Speaker 3: so the point is that these qualities naturally emerge when
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Speaker 3: we are connected to our essence and the deepest place
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Speaker 3: in us of who and what we are. So if
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Speaker 3: I am connected, let's say I believe in a God
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Speaker 3: or a higher power, whatever you want to call it,
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Speaker 3: when I'm connected to it, you know, then these qualities
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Speaker 3: will naturally emerge. You know, I'll feel gratitude, I'll feel humidity,
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Speaker 3: I'll feel my calling, I'll feel my sense of purpose.
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Speaker 3: I'm naturally going to be pulled to be of service.
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Speaker 3: But again that's the difference between spiritual belief. I might
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Speaker 3: believe in the Higher Power when I go to church
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Speaker 3: on Sunday and I in that, But then do I
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Speaker 3: am I connected to that higher power? That essence, when
14:55
Speaker 3: I'm driving on the frameway or I'm in line in
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Speaker 3: the supermarket and the person in front of is very slow,
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Speaker 3: and I get that daily practice and the embodiment of
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Speaker 3: these qualities.
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Speaker 1: Right, all right, let me just remind you what I'm
15:08
Speaker 1: speaking with doctor Yo. See, I'm ram So, so what
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Speaker 1: is your mission now? What are you how are you
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Speaker 1: integrating or incorporating this into the work you do?
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Speaker 3: Well, my mission is to awaken spiritual intelligence, first in
15:24
Speaker 3: myself and in the world. I think, you know our world.
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Speaker 3: You know, we've done amazing things as humanity with our IQ,
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Speaker 3: our cognitive intelligence. We landed on the moon, we've split
15:37
Speaker 3: the atom, we've deciphered the genome. Now we've got AI
15:40
Speaker 3: that's smarter than many of us, including myself. We've developed
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Speaker 3: emotional intelligence that helped us.
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Speaker 2: You know, be aware and manage our emotions.
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Speaker 3: But if you look at the world, it's still pretty
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Speaker 3: messed up situation, you know, anxiety, depression, substance abuse, addiction,
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Speaker 3: suicide rates are skyrock a political polarization, environmental devastation, wars,
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Speaker 3: et cetera. So I think the missing piece is the
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Speaker 3: piece of spiritual intelligence to complement IQ and EQ emotional
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Speaker 3: cognitive intelligence and emotional intelligence. So I believe that's what
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Speaker 3: we need is the understanding of that at all levels,
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Speaker 3: at leadership and at all levels. So what I'm doing
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Speaker 3: and how I'm trying to promote spiritual intelligence is through
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Speaker 3: my work one with leaders. So when I work with
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Speaker 3: a leader and a corporation, the CEO typically, then as
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Speaker 3: they develop their spiritual intelligence, then that has a ripple
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Speaker 3: effect and affects the culture and the whole organization and
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Speaker 3: through them their employees and when they go home and
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Speaker 3: et cetera. And I'm affecting it through my research. And
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Speaker 3: then the other place is through my work with couples.
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Speaker 3: And I am working right now on a similar research
16:56
Speaker 3: that I did on leadership with couples to show and
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Speaker 3: see how spiritual intelligence helps explain relational satisfaction beyond and
17:07
Speaker 3: above what attachment theory and emotional intelligence can explain.
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Speaker 1: So indeed, let's kind of magnify that a little bit,
17:17
Speaker 1: because I think that would be very interesting for our
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Speaker 1: audience here. How do you work with couples in that context?
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Speaker 1: How do you assess for that? What do you do specifically?
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Speaker 3: Well, you know, there is a framework of you know,
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Speaker 3: spiritual intelligence. In my model, there's five domain and twenty
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Speaker 3: two qualities. I mentioned some of them. So let's take
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Speaker 3: one of them as compassion and you know, so I
17:46
Speaker 3: do look at a couple through the lens of attachment.
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Speaker 3: So let's take a couple, you know, I was working
17:52
Speaker 3: with recently and they were getting disregulated about you know,
17:57
Speaker 3: one person has a history of growing up in a
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Speaker 3: family with alcoholic person parents and substance abuse, et cetera.
18:06
Speaker 3: And then this other person, their partner was leading using
18:11
Speaker 3: substances like ayahuasca and other things to help people in
18:17
Speaker 3: their awakening and journey. But as they were looking at
18:21
Speaker 3: getting mirror and this one person was super triggered by
18:24
Speaker 3: this idea that this person uses substances, et cetera. And
18:28
Speaker 3: this other person that is seeing that as her mission
18:31
Speaker 3: to bring this work into the world, was getting triggered
18:34
Speaker 3: because she wasn't feeling supportive. So they're trying to negotiate
18:38
Speaker 3: what this is, but they were getting reactive and triggered.
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Speaker 3: So one of the things that I worked with them
18:44
Speaker 3: on is first to help regulate themselves through self compassion.
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Speaker 3: And you know, a spiritual practice from the Tibetan Buddhist
18:55
Speaker 3: tradition called Tong Glynn of compassion where you take in
19:01
Speaker 3: the person in front of you suffering, bringing it into
19:04
Speaker 3: your heart and send out kindness and love. So as
19:08
Speaker 3: they did that between them, they understood that first of all,
19:11
Speaker 3: that they're both suffering in this difficulty. So first they
19:15
Speaker 3: had to regulate their nervous system, find their centeredness, and
19:19
Speaker 3: a self compassion practice can be helpful in that, and
19:23
Speaker 3: a cocompassion practice as a couple, which then opens their heart,
19:27
Speaker 3: and then they could really look at the specifics of
19:30
Speaker 3: what their disagreements are and negotiate the boundaries of what
19:36
Speaker 3: would be an acceptable way for them to navigate through
19:40
Speaker 3: these different views. So that's an example of a quality
19:44
Speaker 3: of compassion that I consider part of spiritual intelligence that
19:49
Speaker 3: comes in so into a couple.
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Speaker 1: What I liked about that was finding that one of
19:57
Speaker 1: those common denominators of compassion, and I think we all
20:02
Speaker 1: can agree, or many of us hopefully can agree of
20:06
Speaker 1: the profundity of having compassion not just for ourselves but
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Speaker 1: for the person sitting in front of us, right, and
20:13
Speaker 1: of course that's not always easy to do. I could
20:17
Speaker 1: imagine that that couple getting into the spirited you know,
20:22
Speaker 1: push and pull about who who's right and who's wrong,
20:26
Speaker 1: and you're getting in there and kind of finding that foundation.
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Speaker 3: Them, helping them regulate themselves and threaten to each other.
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Speaker 3: They're shared humanity and they understand that they're both suffering, so,
20:40
Speaker 3: you know, and related to that is shared forgiveness. I mean,
20:43
Speaker 3: that's so important. Like in couple's work is like you
20:47
Speaker 3: did this and we hold resentment. So another spiritual quality
20:52
Speaker 3: virtue you might call this forgiveness and you know, so
20:57
Speaker 3: that would be another thing that becomes hugely important.
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Speaker 2: Or presence.
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Speaker 3: You know, so many of us are so distracted these
21:04
Speaker 3: days and so much as tugging in our attention, so
21:08
Speaker 3: we go out on dates with our partners or whatever,
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Speaker 3: and we're looking at our phone, we're thinking about different things.
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Speaker 3: So practicing learning to be present and manage our attention
21:21
Speaker 3: and intention when we are with our partners. So that's
21:24
Speaker 3: a spiritual intelligence capacity is our capacity for presence.
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Speaker 1: It feels and correct me if I'm wrong here, but
21:32
Speaker 1: it feels like the world in which we're living right now,
21:37
Speaker 1: and you kind of touch upon this is doing the
21:40
Speaker 1: antithesis of this is pulling us away from these principles
21:48
Speaker 1: of spiritual intelligence, and we have to like, it's like
21:52
Speaker 1: we're being pulled by this undertow and have to get
21:55
Speaker 1: back to the groundedness of the shore of compassion and presence.
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Speaker 1: Why is that so challenging for many of us?
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Speaker 3: Yes, because we have social media, we have texts, we
22:09
Speaker 3: have so much, we have an inner vacuum. We live
22:13
Speaker 3: in a society and a culture that teaches us that,
22:16
Speaker 3: you know, you get yourself worth through the toys you
22:20
Speaker 3: have or whatever, and the fame and glory and how
22:24
Speaker 3: many likes you have on social media and and all
22:27
Speaker 3: these things which are really trying to fill the inner
22:30
Speaker 3: hole that we have in our soul. And we we
22:34
Speaker 3: we stuff it with substances and alcohol and and social
22:39
Speaker 3: media and money and toys and luxury and whatever. And
22:44
Speaker 3: that's part of our consumerist you know mindset that that
22:53
Speaker 3: that we grow up in. But you know, face it,
22:57
Speaker 3: you know, twelve to eighteen month old babies pre verbal
23:05
Speaker 3: experienced shame. You know, when our primary caretaker, you know,
23:11
Speaker 3: simply turns away from us. You know, our mother, whoever
23:14
Speaker 3: it is, might have something on the stove burning, or
23:17
Speaker 3: someone knocks on the door, and.
23:19
Speaker 2: They get up, they leave the baby.
23:21
Speaker 3: And for a moment they were like in eye contact
23:24
Speaker 3: and this dual unity, shared connection, and all of a sudden,
23:29
Speaker 3: the mom gets up and leaves. Now the baby has
23:31
Speaker 3: no model to know what's going on. But if you
23:34
Speaker 3: look at their physiology, often they assume the reason she
23:38
Speaker 3: left is because they're not good enough or there's the
23:40
Speaker 3: problems with them. So we grow up with this thing
23:43
Speaker 3: that's deep in our soul, is this sense of shame, inadequacy.
23:49
Speaker 3: I'm not enough, I'm not lovable. And then we build
23:52
Speaker 3: our lives. And that's what the ego is trying to do,
23:55
Speaker 3: is to make us feel good about ourselves. So if
23:57
Speaker 3: I make enough money, if I have enough sex with
24:01
Speaker 3: enough people, or if I have you know, such and
24:04
Speaker 3: such a career, I achieve fame and glory and social
24:09
Speaker 3: thing that will make me feel good about who I
24:11
Speaker 3: am and will compensate for this deep deficiency, that this
24:16
Speaker 3: this hole.
24:17
Speaker 2: In my soul.
24:18
Speaker 3: And so we have that you know, deep within us,
24:22
Speaker 3: and that's what the ego forms around. And then we
24:25
Speaker 3: have society that's leveraging that through advertising and text messages
24:31
Speaker 3: and social media that's trying to make us deal with
24:36
Speaker 3: that sense of inner deficiency and lack. And so we're
24:40
Speaker 3: prone for all these addictions that take us away from
24:44
Speaker 3: but you know, we can't fill that home without going
24:47
Speaker 3: into it with consciously and then and then we discover
24:52
Speaker 3: our inherent beauty and radiance.
24:55
Speaker 1: And that's that's what I want to ask. She's me
24:58
Speaker 1: for interrupting here in the time we have left here
25:01
Speaker 1: as we kind of wind own, how do we reconnect?
25:09
Speaker 1: Give us some ideas of what we can do to
25:14
Speaker 1: allow ourselves to tap into our own spirituality spiritual intelligence
25:22
Speaker 1: in that sense.
25:23
Speaker 3: Well, we need to connect with our life force energy,
25:25
Speaker 3: which is you know, our breath of life. Spirit comes
25:29
Speaker 3: from Latin, the animating breath of life. So I'm just simplified.
25:33
Speaker 3: But you know that may not be practical for many people.
25:36
Speaker 3: For most people, what might be a better entry point
25:39
Speaker 3: is start a gratitude practice every day.
25:41
Speaker 2: We know that that helps you know, you.
25:44
Speaker 3: Go through your day, you think about what you could appreciate,
25:47
Speaker 3: you could share that appreciation with others, et cetera. It
25:50
Speaker 3: makes you feel connected.
25:52
Speaker 2: You know.
25:52
Speaker 3: The other thing is recognizing that each and every one
25:55
Speaker 3: of us receives this amazing gift called life. You know,
26:00
Speaker 3: none of us did anything to earn it. But in
26:03
Speaker 3: addition to the gift of life, we got all these
26:05
Speaker 3: other gifts, which is our talents, superpowers and zone of genius.
26:11
Speaker 2: And for each person it's unique.
26:13
Speaker 3: It could be you know, you seem like a good, engaged,
26:17
Speaker 3: curious listener and that's one of your gifts, as I
26:19
Speaker 3: feel it in this moment. And so that comes to
26:22
Speaker 3: expression and being a good podcast interviewer.
26:26
Speaker 2: You know, someone else is.
26:27
Speaker 3: Good and there's zone of genius as math and whatever
26:30
Speaker 3: in science, and they become a programmer. Someone else is
26:33
Speaker 3: their sense of humor and their comedian, and someone else
26:36
Speaker 3: is writing, etc. So we want to ask life, what
26:41
Speaker 3: has life given me as my gifts?
26:43
Speaker 2: And then.
26:46
Speaker 3: Because when we actualize those gifts, we feel most fulfilled
26:51
Speaker 3: and those are the domains we're naturally gonna be good
26:54
Speaker 3: at and we're going to feel a sense of mastery.
26:56
Speaker 3: And then's how we can contribute. So when you give
27:00
Speaker 3: a friend a gift for their birthday. If you find
27:04
Speaker 3: out a month later they never opened it and never
27:07
Speaker 3: use it, it's like you're disappointed. So life kind of
27:10
Speaker 3: gave each of us a gift, the gift of life
27:13
Speaker 3: and all these things. It's like inviting us. Hey, I'm
27:16
Speaker 3: giving you this package of talents. Please use them to
27:19
Speaker 3: enhance life. So unpack your gift and use it. And
27:24
Speaker 3: so that helps us find our calling, our sense of purpose.
27:29
Speaker 3: So that would be another practice, you know, so we
27:34
Speaker 3: can keep going on. I mean, there's these twenty two qualities.
27:38
Speaker 3: But you know, you can't just say, Okay.
27:41
Speaker 2: I want to be healthy. What do I do? Do
27:43
Speaker 2: I just read a.
27:44
Speaker 3: Book about physical fitness. Do I read a book about
27:48
Speaker 3: nutrition and diet? Do I read a book about high
27:51
Speaker 3: quality sleep?
27:52
Speaker 2: Now? I gotta exercise.
27:55
Speaker 3: I gotta whether it's going to the gym or hiking
27:59
Speaker 3: in nature, or whether it's you know, figuring out a
28:02
Speaker 3: diet that is healthy from my constitution and my body.
28:06
Speaker 3: And I don't just do it for a week. I mean,
28:09
Speaker 3: I can go on a diet for a week a
28:10
Speaker 3: month lose weight. I'm like, okay, I'm good, and I
28:13
Speaker 3: can go back to eating junk food and candy and.
28:17
Speaker 1: To practice life practice.
28:19
Speaker 2: It's a lifelong thing. It's rewiring our brain.
28:23
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, all right, you'll see how do people reach
28:28
Speaker 1: reach you learn more about you, learn more about your
28:31
Speaker 1: book again, Spiritually Intelligent Leadership. How to inspire by being inspired?
28:35
Speaker 1: What's the best way?
28:37
Speaker 3: Well, the easiest way to remember, given my name is
28:40
Speaker 3: not the easiest to remember and spell, is to go
28:43
Speaker 3: to Awakening Spiritual Intelligence dot org. It's a nonprofit and
28:48
Speaker 3: I host free events, et cetera. From there, you can
28:51
Speaker 3: get to my book and there's a free assessment tool
28:56
Speaker 3: that I offer for assessing your spiritual intelligence profile, the
29:01
Speaker 3: areas of your strengths, the areas of your development opportunities.
29:07
Speaker 2: There are lots of other.
29:08
Speaker 3: Resources, but you know, go to Awakening Spiritual Intelligence dot
29:12
Speaker 3: org one word and that would be the simple thing.
29:17
Speaker 3: Or you can go to Awakening SI just short for
29:21
Speaker 3: Spiritual Intelligence dot org. You're trying it right now, so
29:26
Speaker 3: hopefully it works.
29:27
Speaker 1: We will. We will have that link appear at the
29:30
Speaker 1: show notes page.
29:30
Speaker 3: I think you can also go to yoc dot net,
29:33
Speaker 3: which is my spooled full spelled name, but you know,
29:36
Speaker 3: I'll save you the spelling.
29:38
Speaker 1: Okay, we'll have all those linked up again. Yosie, thanks
29:41
Speaker 1: so much, awesome love to have you back.
29:44
Speaker 2: Thank you guys all right, take care,