Latest / Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily / Mile High by Liz Tomforde - We’ve Lost Cabin Pressure (and Our Dignity)

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Mile High by Liz Tomforde - We’ve Lost Cabin Pressure (and Our Dignity) · Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily

0:00
Hi friends, you're listening to Lose the Plot with Carla and
0:03
Emily. In this episode we're reading
0:05
Mile High by Liz Tomford. We are talking about the entire
0:09
book, so warning there will be spoilers.
0:26
I'm Carla, and wearing your hand around my throat like a necklace
0:30
is my favorite piece of jewelry. I'm Emily.
0:33
There's a good chance there's dried mustard on my chin.
0:36
Before we take off into today's episode, and trust us, this
0:40
one's as steamy as a private jet at 30,000 feet, we've got a
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quick favour to ask. If you've been loving our deep
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dives into all things smutty, take a second now to hit that
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five star call button on whatever platform you're using.
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It helps us reach more listeners and keeps this podcast flying
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high. Baby, do you remember that I was
1:02
waiting for you to crash out? Thanks for keeping us cruising.
1:09
Trigger warnings from trigger warning database.
1:13
Fat phobia. Sorry, that came out of the
1:17
gate. Pretty harsh.
1:18
Fat phobia and body shaming. Disgust, including internalized
1:22
body shaming and dysmorphia, Panic attacks, suicidal
1:26
ideation, vomiting, alcohol consumption and drug use.
1:34
Just the basics. You know.
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Just the regular. Just The Reg.
1:37
Saturday afternoon. Reg.
1:40
So let's get right into it. Hey, let's not fuck around.
1:43
Maybe in another life, in another world where I would be
1:48
allowed to not read the book, the 1st chapter would have
1:52
killed it for me. Really.
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The misogyny, the gross women work for me.
1:59
It's just not in my wheelhouse, no.
2:02
Honestly, though, are we surprised?
2:04
No, I just like. Am I supposed to like this man?
2:10
Honestly. I don't even know.
2:12
OK, so let's start with Stevie is the main female character.
2:16
Yes. She's a 27 year old flight
2:18
attendant, she has a famous twin brother who plays basketball,
2:22
and she's got tits and ass. OK.
2:25
She's got curves. Oh, good.
2:26
She's got, she's got her. She's.
2:28
Got the titties and the booty, but she shouldn't even be a
2:31
flight attendant. She can't even make it through
2:33
the aisle without going sideways.
2:35
Wait. What the fuck?
2:36
Which way should she be going? Which way is she thicker?
2:41
How to tell? She's gonna go bottle.
2:46
Already crashing out, what would you do if she was your flight
2:49
attendant? Stare out the roof?
2:53
Plead the. 5th. I'm sorry.
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I'd be like, I'm so sorry. I'm no better than a man.
3:01
I'm not praying because there's turbulence.
3:02
I'm praying because. Of this flood attendant.
3:04
Ass. Oh.
3:07
No, she's got me questioning my sexuality.
3:09
Oh my. God, she's turning everyone
3:11
bisexual. Oh she's got those chests, not
3:15
curls. The amount of times you had to
3:17
hear about the chest, not curls. At least we weren't hearing
3:20
about twirling pubes so. To be fair, yeah.
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Thank fuck we got no pube info, that's a new one.
3:30
It's like the bare minimum, but. Still true.
3:33
We love, we love. But she's OK.
3:35
Look, she's got a body, OK? She's body, body.
3:39
Body Oddy, except she's like embarrassed about it bro.
3:44
She's like this. Is actually sad.
3:48
Her mum's a bitch. Bitch, bitch, bitch.
3:55
Honestly though. Her mum's got problems.
3:59
OK, so first thing we're told about her is she's not a size 2.
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No, not a size 2. Her clothes are tearing up the
4:07
seams. They're about to bust open.
4:09
Yes. The seams straining, yeah.
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There's a whole tit gap. And The thing is, this is a new
4:17
uniform, Yes, because this is her first time working for the
4:20
team, and this is the first time the team is going to have an
4:23
exclusive flight attendant group for the entire.
4:27
Instead of a whole different people every year.
4:31
Normally it's like the Uber Eats flight attendants where you just
4:34
get a different driver every time.
4:37
They just be fucking every know. Who made that decision?
4:40
We're a responsible person. Someone who's heard of
4:44
accountability? Yeah.
4:46
They're like, there's too many rogue pregnant flight attendants
4:49
after last season. Let's just lock it in.
4:51
Let's just get one show every night.
4:54
What is up with that? I'm like, I'm suppose you're on
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an 8 hour flight. The team that she's working for
5:00
is a Chicago hockey team. Like pro level, pro level.
5:04
So they're playing all the big games, so she has to go on every
5:08
flight that they go on to and from games, home and back.
5:11
Why do they have to get full naked?
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That's what I don't understand. Because they're getting into so
5:16
with hockey, I feel. You don't?
5:18
Please. Explain hockey.
5:20
Please explain hockey. I am a hockey connoisseur of
5:24
men. Yes.
5:25
So they wear suits to and from the game.
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It's supposed to be a respect thing.
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So they have to be seen to and from the game wearing suits.
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So that would include to and from there.
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The plane. Yeah.
5:37
OK. And this is a private plane, so
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they're probably going to the VIP section of the airport, so
5:42
they don't want to look sloppy. No, and then they got to get
5:44
redressed when they get off the plane. 8 hour flight.
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Are they going to overseas I. Don't know like they.
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Were like. Overnight.
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Flight. And I'm like, where are you?
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Look, I don't know how the Americas works.
5:58
It's probably like an hour. Just suck it up.
6:00
No I feel like 1 East Coast to West Coast is like 5 hours.
6:04
OK, well then I'm not far off. Sort of like Australia, but on
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the map America looks 10 times the size of Australia.
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Yeah, true, the map makers be scamming.
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In it's the same size. It's the same size.
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Yeah, it's illusion. Because you know how there's a
6:18
world map? They're like, fuck off
6:20
Australia, you're down the bottom and you're fucking puny.
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Fair enough. We are we big, we big boy, we
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big. Takes us 48 hours to get
6:30
anywhere. And of course the most arsehole
6:34
of assholes on the team is Evan Zanders.
6:38
His best mate is Madison and he's the Family Guy, so they're
6:43
the dynamic duo where he's the arsehole who's sleeping with the
6:46
new supermodel every night. And then you've got family, man.
6:50
Family Man. Who cares?
6:53
Honestly, Who cares? But also her like imagination
6:57
and saying because she's like, you know what?
6:59
Let's give this man a woman's name, a female's name, and then
7:03
we'll just give his wife a typically male name.
7:07
I'm like OK. What was the male's name?
7:10
So it was wife Logan. But Madison was the surname,
7:13
wasn't it? No.
7:14
Oh, maybe. It was something Madison because
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they would call him Zander. Send him Madison have to say
7:20
only last names or nicknames. Maybe because it's football and
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it's like a bro thing. I mean football.
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Explain hockey to me. Look, we're not doing sports
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anytime soon. Honestly, I hate sports
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romances. It doesn't matter what they're
7:38
doing on the field, OK? We don't care.
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I don't. Care.
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Ohh I I'm not gonna lie, I skipped a whole chapter of him
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on the ice. Ohh.
7:46
I didn't even know he was on the ice.
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There was a whole chapter of him on the ice, and I was.
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Playing field hockey. It's not Australia, they.
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Have actual. I don't know, Chicago doesn't
7:57
sound like a cold. Place to me what the hell works
8:01
you're like? They have big ass machines.
8:04
Air conditioning. Look what a well.
8:06
Your girl wasn't here for those minute details, OK?
8:10
It was at the end and I was like, look, I don't care about
8:12
you winning the steel. Colour penalty box all the time.
8:15
Anyway, that's his bit. Why is he getting paid the most
8:19
to be in the box the most? Because he's a defenceman, look.
8:23
Like it's just. Who has been doing his PR?
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Like he's stupid, Yeah, but he's the agent.
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He's but he needs APR. He needs someone to rehab this
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shit. It's not OK.
8:34
You're getting on. He's isn't he 27?
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He's 11. He's 11.
8:39
Oh, no, no. He's 27.
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This. Is.
8:41
Oops, I was. Trying to do the whip work.
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Call the police. Why?
8:50
He's actually trying on flight. Would you like a blinky and a
8:55
lollipop for your flight? Didn't you to?
8:57
Just that. Honestly, he acts 11.
9:02
It's giving 11 year old Andrew Tate follow up, but.
9:06
I don't feel like 11 year olds would act like that.
9:08
They try to. They try so hard, they come out
9:15
scary. Is he 27?
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I thought they're 20. Seven, I think she's 26 and he's
9:22
28. So they're close, but in hockey
9:26
years? He's oh man, he's on his way to
9:29
retirement. Some deathbed, yeah.
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And so I think they. Only last for like 35.
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At sure, least. So anyway, Stevie's happy and
9:38
excited about this job. She's going to be working as
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this flight attendant. Making money.
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She met her new Co worker Indy and then she doesn't like the
9:46
head flight attendant Tara. Fuck Tara.
9:48
Who is that bitch? Who is she?
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Who? Is she her just trying to follow
9:53
the rules? Be for real, she ends up getting
9:57
fired in the end for doing the exact thing she.
10:00
Told me to do. Tara is a hypocrite.
10:03
Yeah, we love Love 1. No.
10:06
Is she a hypocrite or she's smart?
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Is she getting all for her? Maybe she's just defending.
10:12
Yeah, her game. She her options her.
10:15
Strat is to meet a wealthy hockey player.
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Honestly, so valid, so fair. Valid.
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So she's 27, he's 28, and he's just.
10:24
All he does is # Puss. Let's.
10:26
Be so who doesn't even # puss at this point?
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He just drops him off and goes home.
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Which? Is just he's.
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In a bit of a lull, yeah. I feel like he's pounded too
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many puss. Yeah.
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He's got a list, Yeah. He doesn't even know who is who.
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No. He has to remind himself based
10:45
on the sexual things that they did last time.
10:48
Like if you're going to open up a Google Docs, at least add
10:50
pictures. I had a snippet of their
10:52
Instagram. Yeah.
10:54
And so any time he's going to a different city, he just scrolls
10:57
through that little thing with which city and then the list of
11:00
girls, and then he'll kind of remember who to DM back because
11:04
he's got options. They'll just pop up knowing
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where he's going to be that. That's weird.
11:08
Bizarre behaviour. I'm like, if you're getting so
11:10
many DMS on Instagram, surely you can't see them all.
11:14
And surely you can just look at the previous conversation.
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Why do you have to go out of your way to make a Google doc
11:19
like a notes app? Like OK.
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Organized. Organized.
11:24
At least you know the dates. So if you get an SDI, you know
11:27
who to tell, yeah? Question mark.
11:28
Pregnancy Question mark. Question mark.
11:33
Question mark. Honestly, can we just appreciate
11:36
that for once, no one's mum is dead?
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However, they're both bitches. We can't have it all.
11:44
We made it so far with no healthy mum.
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Honestly. Healthy Dads.
11:49
Oh. Can we start with the fact that
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both of their mums are trash and then both of their dads happen
11:54
to be Saints? Oh my gosh.
11:56
It's the lack. Oh, it's the lack of
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imagination. Oh, they could have been the
12:01
same guy and it wouldn't have mattered.
12:03
I would do the opposite square honestly.
12:06
Can someone just have a batshit crazy sister or something?
12:09
We've had that before, have we? In real life or no?
12:14
In things, the very first one we did with Lucy School, ohh,
12:18
things about the light and then she's the twin sister who's.
12:21
Crazy things we gonna never got over.
12:24
There's light in there somewhere.
12:27
Crazy sister. And he calls her Daisy and shit,
12:30
Yeah. Look, that's a throwback.
12:35
Oh my God it's been a while. Honestly the mums were trash but
12:38
I'm thinking Zander's mum was actually worse than Stevie's.
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Is that a controversial? No, same same, different font,
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different pay bracket. True, Stevie's mum was super fat
12:50
phobic and judgmental and like. Look, you're gonna have you have
12:54
one who's so traumatised she can't even look in a mirror.
12:57
She can't even eat a meal. She can't wear clothes.
13:01
Do you want Chinese meal? Beautiful.
13:03
She can't even eat it. Can't do anything.
13:05
And then you've got one who's got girl issues, mummy issues.
13:09
Yeah, yeah. Doesn't think he's loved.
13:11
I'm like it all. It all, it all melds together
13:17
and apparently Zenders has been going to therapy for like ages.
13:22
Still hasn't worked it out. Grasping out straws.
13:28
He's so. Scared so profound hasn't worked
13:31
out. He's so scared though because
13:33
every girl represents this gold digger that his mom definitely
13:37
is. You know what I mean?
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I'm sorry if I gave bath to a kid that ends up a squillion.
13:44
You can't give me a bit of sparkling champagne when I come
13:47
over. No, fuck her what she deserved.
13:52
Tap. Water she deserved.
13:54
Rosie's dog bowl poured into a cup.
13:58
I hope you did that. But like sorry for existing.
14:03
Imagine walking into a house after not seeing your kid for
14:06
like 15 years and you're like I actually will take a champagne.
14:11
Dresses. Yeah, true, true.
14:14
She's really 15 years. Damn.
14:16
Well, it's 16, so somewhat Damn. So yeah, she walked in and she's
14:20
like coffee, tea, champagne. Yeah, and she whenever she
14:25
whenever she finds his numb, she's sort of like tries to
14:29
weasel her way in. Yeah.
14:31
Mm. Hmm.
14:31
She goes through the sister as well to sort of guilt trip and
14:35
he's like convulsing all the time about it because like it
14:39
gives him major anxiety. Fair enough.
14:42
What? He's so weak.
14:44
It's so. Awkward when it cuts out.
14:47
But what else do we need to know about Zanders?
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He's physically attractive, he's buff, obviously he's rich.
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He's rich, he dresses nice, Good fashion, good fashion.
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The black Christian Grey, if you will.
15:00
If you will. So.
15:02
Oh, he does have mummy issues. He does.
15:04
That's mummy issues. Not as many.
15:06
Not as many. He's not weird about it.
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Fucked so hate. Him and I'll bring him up at any
15:13
opportunity. What's really?
15:14
Funny about. That.
15:15
He might that was going to be our next.
15:18
I was thinking next book pic. What?
15:20
50 Shades. We already.
15:21
Didn't. No, we didn't.
15:23
What the fuck? Oh, we did.
15:25
We do the. Movie.
15:27
Yeah, back when we were doing movies.
15:29
Yeah, well, that's a throwback. We're not doing that again.
15:32
That was just fucking. Yeah.
15:36
Oh you're like no, but we should instead how much I hate
15:40
Christian grow with a passion that I.
15:42
Want to think about? Is his tidy whitey's under his
15:44
weird jeans, walking down into the room of pain.
15:47
That's why it would be so good. Anyway, back to the plot of
15:52
lack. Well, lack thereof.
15:55
Why was this like 650 pages you said?
15:58
That's the wild. That is wild for a romance.
16:01
That's wild. We don't need that much for a
16:04
romance. It had no plot.
16:07
Plot was man, hockey, woman, flight attendant.
16:10
Literally. And also I feel that the depth
16:13
the length of book was trying to make up for the lack of depth of
16:16
the characters. Like if you just keep yakking on
16:18
forever about unnamed things, you know the camel.
16:21
Also another thing with why this book was so long, if you notice
16:25
she finished up a scene, she would then go back into the
16:30
other person's perspective and I'm like, just have one.
16:33
Why are we doubling up? I don't want to read it twice.
16:36
No, Pick the character who's more important and then do the
16:39
scene from there. But like, do it in a way.
16:42
Like, you don't necessarily have to rewrite it.
16:46
Write their expressions in. I'll work it out.
16:48
Yeah, exactly. Unless it's some, like, fantasy
16:51
plot where you actually have no idea what they're thinking.
16:54
That is the only time. Well.
16:56
There's new information. She got to cut it down 100 pages
16:59
just by taking them out. Easily.
17:02
I also think that this book got confused of who the main
17:05
character was because if you're writing to a female audience,
17:07
Stevie should be the main character.
17:09
But like halfway through the source it was all about Xander's
17:15
and everything Xander wants and Xander's perspective.
17:17
I'm like EW. And the challenge at the end was
17:20
all about Xander's. Not even about Stevie at all.
17:23
No. What choice did she even have in
17:25
this book, ultimately? None.
17:28
Date him or not, that's it. I know he's got mummy issues
17:31
from the rich right, but when I pick a girl that literally
17:36
dresses like a slob. He liked that, remember, because
17:40
he goes. You're so different.
17:41
Yeah, but like, because you've got a millionaire brother and
17:43
you still don't want to do. It weird, Yeah, it's weird.
17:46
No, but she could not dress like a slob and still dress like why
17:51
are you going out in stained ripped short.
17:55
Like in the end, the reason she threw out them track pants is
17:58
because she ripped a hole in them because they had heaps of
18:01
holes in them. So I'm like, I understand you're
18:05
insecure, but also you're going out of your brother's apartment.
18:09
If I was looking at a tabloid ride and you were leaving your
18:12
rich brother's apartment, I would assume that he treats you
18:15
like shit. And I'd be like, wow, he really
18:19
makes her scrub the ground, you know what I mean?
18:22
But I was thinking for Stevie, I feel like she was serving.
18:24
Face. I feel like she's the type.
18:25
Of girl to have a skin care routine, makeup routine,
18:28
beautiful curled hair all the time.
18:30
The fuck is she doing walking around in moth eaten track
18:33
pants? With a mustard on her face.
18:35
Absolutely not. It did not fit her not.
18:37
But then she bought the wrong size uniform for this new job.
18:41
But she also says that her weight fluctuates a lot.
18:43
Yeah. So she was really offended when
18:45
Tara was like, you're obviously trying to wear a small thing to
18:49
get attention. Yeah.
18:50
The thing that fucked me off most about this.
18:52
Yeah, bigger picture is that Xander's magically fixes all of
18:57
her body dysmorphia because he wants to fuck her.
18:59
Shut up. Also, I understand all of that,
19:02
but I don't want to hear about it every two seconds.
19:04
I know it was supposed to be her only like character floor I
19:07
guess. It was a lot.
19:09
It was a lot. It was all the time.
19:11
Why is he the only fix? Because he's like.
19:13
Exactly. He wants to have the lights on
19:15
during sex, OK. He did every BAM member.
19:18
He did the BAM. Like sorry, isn't that every
19:21
male? When they were talking in the
19:22
mirror and he was talking about her thighs and he's like, I like
19:25
when you sit on me with them. OK cool.
19:28
That's a weird sentence though. Also duh and.
19:31
I'm like damn. OK, before we get into thigh
19:35
face sitting, let's go to the web where they actually meet.
19:39
So she's in the exit row. She has to do the demonstration
19:42
and he's scrolling on Instagram. Tig old biddies like, yeah,
19:46
jugs, jugs, jugs Sydney Sweeney ad drugs.
19:52
The algorithm is algorithming. He's probably switching.
19:55
It's only fangirl Tinder Ryer Craigslist.
19:59
It's grinder. I don't know.
20:01
We don't know Grinder. There's this is a lot of
20:03
rotation going on again and then she's sitting there like you
20:05
have to answer if you're willing and able to open the exit row.
20:09
He didn't hear a word because he was on straight.
20:11
Porn. And there's porn finally, like
20:13
he finally looks up and she's looking at him like unimpressed.
20:17
She's looking at his phone like damn.
20:19
And also, you cannot pay me to believe me that this is enemies
20:23
to lovers. Shut up.
20:24
No, it's not a nice enemy. Still lovers.
20:27
It's not. It's like a customer to.
20:30
And it's not like enemies to lovers with a reason.
20:34
He's just extremely misogynistic and things that women are meant
20:37
to work for him. And then the second he realised
20:40
that he could keep hitting that call button to force compliance
20:43
out of her. Yeah.
20:45
His ego. Disgusting.
20:47
How small is your ego that you need to be hitting this court?
20:51
Everyone around you is probably trying to have a nap and you're
20:53
constantly like Bing bong Bing bong odd punch.
20:56
That nudge they're so I would be like, I'm not paid enough.
21:01
Honestly just open the exit door and let him fly out at this
21:04
point. I'd be like, actually, my
21:07
brother's rich, I'm going home. OK good point.
21:12
Because why the fuck does she even need this job?
21:14
Because she said the only reason she needed this job is because
21:17
of the flexibility. Go work for an airline, what
21:20
does it matter? The only thing she cares about
21:23
is volunteering for free at the animal shelter.
21:25
Yeah. You can do so many jobs that
21:29
gives you that flexibility. To work with animal shelter like
21:32
cafe do the morning shift. Yeah, and then go to the dog
21:35
shelter in the afternoon. Like, OK, it would make more
21:38
sense to me if she said I wanna do this because I love travel
21:42
and I get these perks. Yeah, and I like being able to
21:44
go somewhere at the location. Why does it have to be that
21:47
she's a loser that wants to be cleaning up shit in the animal
21:51
shelter? For free.
21:52
Oh my God. Also Mile High.
21:54
I get it. We're talking about up in the
21:56
plane, but I didn't realize when they were not in the plane that
22:01
they were there for like 3-5 days at a time.
22:03
But then we caught nothing. It was just on the plane in the
22:06
apartment, on the plane, in the apartment, on the plane.
22:09
And I was like, actually, you know what's funny though?
22:11
Remember we read that other one we thought was going to be a
22:14
plane 1 and it was 2 seconds on the plane stopover.
22:17
Yes. So at least this one's on the
22:19
plane, I suppose. The conversation at the airport,
22:22
yeah, on the plane. Yeah.
22:25
Oh no, they were on the. Plane for like 2 seconds but
22:28
then. Yeah, yeah.
22:30
And but I'm. Listen, I thought this would be
22:32
a pilot stewardess moment, not a hockey one.
22:35
I. Was like hockey.
22:37
Hockey. Yuck.
22:39
Yeah. But at least that would have
22:40
made me believe it. Why is she like a loser who has
22:43
mustard on her face? Holy track pants and all she
22:47
wants, I'm sure. She had eye crust in there too.
22:50
But then you're saying she's so glam and I feel like she's
22:54
serving. Face.
22:55
She's serving face all the time. Her personality type is like put
22:59
together in my mind, and then she just made her a total flop
23:03
for no reason. I don't know, You know what
23:05
Xander's used to A different flight attendant on each flight
23:08
literally gagging on his Dick in the airplane toilet.
23:12
Yeah, gag. Just like he kept talking about
23:15
like going on the Mile High Club and I'm like, you've already
23:18
been there. Be for real for.
23:19
Fucking real be for real. Oh what a liar.
23:22
I've never. Been into mile.
23:23
Like bullshit. Bullshit.
23:28
I'm surprised he did fond of babes.
23:30
I'm like, I'm at this point I'm surprised you haven't fucked
23:33
next to your friend on that. He's the type that they would
23:36
have those business class pods and some chick could be in his
23:40
pod. Oh my God.
23:42
Russell and the Jimmies. Russell and the Sheets.
23:48
I was like, they don't even have to do anything, they just strip
23:50
and everyone's ready. Honestly, though, OK, so the
23:54
setup is he obviously starts pursuing her.
23:58
Yeah. Because he realizes that she's
23:59
like saying no to him. And he's like, what?
24:01
Oh, God forbid. God forbid, but OK, let's look
24:05
at this realistically. Yes.
24:07
Does it fucking matter if she fucks him?
24:10
Really. No, who gives a fuck who?
24:14
Cares except for Tara. I'm like, right?
24:17
Who's the actual boss? Tara.
24:19
Yeah, but you never hear about the pilot.
24:21
You never hear about the company.
24:23
Yeah, fuck Tara. Who's?
24:24
Tara. And why does Tara always pop up
24:26
at the weirdest times? Why does Tara give 80 year old
24:29
woman and 30 and 30 year old at the same time?
24:32
Exactly who is Tara in her free time?
24:35
Who the fuck is Tara? Is there a There's that many
24:37
books I know? Enough about her.
24:39
Does she come back around or is she just some random villain
24:41
like non existent villain? There has to be a female in the
24:44
age range. That's the villain.
24:47
I just don't see that. That's very high stakes because
24:50
Oh no, I'm gonna lose my one flight attendant.
24:52
She could do a different flight attendant job the next day also.
24:55
She could just the lion, the connection of her brother a
24:58
little bit. Exactly.
24:59
And you even said she could work at a cafe around the corner from
25:01
the dog shelter and then guess what?
25:03
You're not staying overnight anywhere.
25:05
Exactly more. Availability for the dog shelter
25:08
or go into like community work if you're so obsessed.
25:12
Yeah, true, but also in saying that when her and Xander are
25:15
actually sleeping together. Mm hmm, he's technically your
25:18
boss. Like somewhat.
25:20
He kind of makes it seem he's coach would be his boss.
25:24
How is Tara gonna fire? You when?
25:26
He could get Tara. Fired.
25:27
I know like he's a bumper at the start.
25:30
I kind of like Stevie because she was a bit of a thirsty.
25:33
Gal, yeah, she was kind of like she was.
25:35
Drooling. She's like, I'm gonna root it
25:37
and boot it. Not necessarily.
25:38
About you, but just. In general, she was like, I'm
25:41
single, I'm ready to mingle, you see?
25:44
Her for like 2 seconds. Oh, and it pisses me off that's.
25:47
What I mean, where did her entire personality go?
25:49
Yeah. She became such a pigmy.
25:52
I was like she was flirting with the bartender.
25:55
Yep, flirting with random guys on the Internet.
25:57
OK, that bartender, I forget anything about him, but.
26:00
At the end, apparently you say fucking everyone.
26:03
Would you believe what Xander says?
26:04
He goes. I saw him in the back and he had
26:06
his hand on the waist of the other waitress.
26:08
Cool and OK. She just wanted to root.
26:12
It doesn't matter. She was, really.
26:13
Married to the guy. And I was like, is there in a
26:15
random city? Yeah, like who?
26:17
Cares he was hot. It just.
26:20
Let him fire tender me. He took that away.
26:26
From her he's act like he. Doesn't do the same fucking
26:28
thing every night. Exactly.
26:31
He's like how dare he kiss everyone that moves?
26:35
Meanwhile, he's like got a rotation and he's fine.
26:37
He's literally got a rotation rotating around him at all
26:40
times. He's like physically in the
26:42
flesh, and he's judging this bartender who earns like, what,
26:45
$7.00 an hour? Oh, so it's OK when you're all
26:48
rich to do it? The bartender is just trying to
26:52
get laid. Stevie was just trying to get
26:53
laid. Like, relax.
26:54
She was trying to eat a good burger, have a beer.
26:57
Yeah, he loved. That though 'cause then she's
26:59
not like other girls, 'cause she was at the bar on her own.
27:02
In. Sweats eating a burger.
27:05
I'm some mustard the. Mustard dripping down, damn it.
27:09
Just be like other girls, I don't care.
27:13
Really. Exhausted.
27:13
And then she was like, can I have this to go?
27:18
Because she saw that the hockey boys were in the bar.
27:20
And then she's already being ripped into by Tara being like,
27:23
you're not allowed to date any of the team, OK.
27:27
She's not dating, she's fucking. But Tara doesn't even know if
27:30
she's like Stevie could be gay. Tyra does nothing about her.
27:35
She's spending her weekend scissoring.
27:37
Leave her be. She could have been married like
27:39
maybe. Tyra doesn't know like gay in
27:42
her life. I think she's gay.
27:43
Misogynistic gay way. I feel like.
27:46
She was stalking Stevie and that's why she always popped up
27:48
at random times to make sure, yeah.
27:50
Just why gay? Stalker.
27:54
I'm just saying. You accusations come fly.
27:57
I'm like, she's so straight. Stalker.
28:00
No, no, so straight. She's gay.
28:02
It's like the woman's version of the men.
28:04
Ohh she's This is why she's like she's.
28:08
Shit. She's misogynistic, homophobic,
28:11
so homophobic she's actually gay.
28:14
She's sitting on the chair at the hotel in the lobby, fucking
28:18
slippers and all, waiting. For her, honestly.
28:22
She would. She would shower Cap.
28:24
She's like 80 years old. Tara Girl.
28:29
Please. Stop it.
28:30
What? Stop it?
28:32
It's all that serious. Fuck me.
28:36
If I was Stevie. Like who gives a fuck?
28:39
I'm like they. Literally have a new job
28:41
tomorrow. Relax.
28:42
That's. Like why do they care?
28:43
You've got like them below deck where they'd be fucking.
28:46
Everyone literally they just assume you are they just.
28:49
Don't. Care.
28:52
Why does it matter this season but not every other season?
28:55
That's what I don't. Understand.
28:57
Just her boss. Just a different boss I'm
28:59
assuming. So they keep flirting with every
29:02
flight and he keeps just popping up at bars and shit when she's
29:06
there. And their stupid ongoing joke is
29:09
oh hey Stevie, are you following me?
29:11
No, no, no, no. Because she'll go.
29:17
Are you following me? 'Cause I looked it up and it
29:19
happened like 20 plus times, yeah.
29:21
And guess what? Tara's fucking following
29:23
everybody. Yeah, so it's really not about
29:25
who's following who, It's about Tara being private.
29:27
Investigator. It's Tara in the background
29:29
going like, look, she's heard it one time.
29:33
She's like, oh, now I do need to follow.
29:37
Honestly, yeah, it wasn't much. Flirting like I just cut down
29:42
like to five. Are you good?
29:43
Following. If you're gonna do it, cut it
29:46
down to five. Good ones.
29:48
Every time that bitch got on the plane he was like, are you
29:50
following me? She works there.
29:53
Yeah, she's on the flight. She's on the Manifesto band.
29:56
Every time he showed up in her apartment building, he said it.
29:59
And I'm like. She lives there too.
30:00
Literally it's. Like.
30:02
Acting surprised that Donald Trump's on the Epstein flight.
30:05
Like what do you mean he's a part of the flight career at
30:08
this? Point babe, He's.
30:10
Funding it. He's doing the in flight demo
30:16
for you around my bed. I'm like.
30:19
Even when he was like. He was surprised to see her at a
30:22
bench across from her apartment. Oh my God.
30:25
Anytime there's a hotel, she'd be like at the nearest food
30:28
place and he'd be like, are you following me?
30:30
Maybe she just had to walk, he'd dipshit.
30:33
He's honestly eager. The size of the universe.
30:36
Just all the time this book was so repetitive for.
30:40
I know, I know. Why do we have to hear about?
30:42
This gold digger mum like just in the back.
30:45
Or like all his rings all the time.
30:47
I get it all. The rings.
30:49
The rings, the necklace, and that was in there a lot too.
30:53
The jewellery fetish was really fetishing at some point.
30:57
Yeah. You're telling me this grown man
31:00
put one of her shitty thrifted rings on his pinky?
31:05
Shit's turning green, Elgy. And.
31:08
He's. Walking around wearing a pinky
31:11
ring. He's even taping it under his.
31:14
Does he have like a little? OK, OK, hear me out.
31:17
In his little locker, does he have like a little ring trinket
31:21
because he's just pulling them off before he goes or does he
31:24
not take them? He's got a little.
31:26
Spot, he's got to have some. He's just.
31:29
Yeah, maybe like a. Travel case.
31:31
A trinket tray. Trinket leather zip around
31:34
situation do you reckon or? Do you reckon it would be like a
31:36
gurgly little tree? You know when he opens.
31:41
Up his locker and it's just this little tree.
31:44
I love that and the pinky Bing lost.
31:47
No, it doesn't come off. Oh sorry, he's skating around
31:51
with this shit on his finger. Yeah, he nearly in the last game
31:56
he nearly got thrown out of the game because he refused to take
31:58
it off. Embarrassing.
32:00
They weren't even together. Embarrassing.
32:03
Grow up. Jesus had enough.
32:08
I don't know, I can't remember like why he's not talking to his
32:10
dad, but it really doesn't matter.
32:13
He's not talking to his dad because he reckons his dad
32:16
abandoned him when his dad was just working overtime to pay for
32:19
his sister to do her lawyer degree and him to go to hockey.
32:23
And he's like, my dad's not proud enough of me.
32:25
I'm like he's single parenting. Yeah, your mum's insane.
32:29
Your mum just left him to single parent.
32:32
He's paying for everything so he's working overtime.
32:36
It's probably burnt out. And he's probably just humble
32:39
where he doesn't. He's not going to be all up in
32:41
your grill about every little game you go to.
32:43
Also I know it's really sad to get that at 16 but at least you
32:47
weren't like 816 year olds do their own shit anyway.
32:52
They're rarely ever wanting to be around their parent.
32:54
But he's like, hanging on to it. I was like, you've got three
32:57
good years left until you're kicked out of the house.
32:59
What do you mean? How was he so shallow and
33:03
misogynistic at the start if he's supposedly doing all this
33:06
therapy to be a better? I don't understand also how is
33:10
he this apparent big family man, great person behind the scenes
33:14
and he's just got this Internet persona.
33:16
Yes. The persona is him.
33:18
And how is it Rich's fault? Stop blaming Rich.
33:22
When he wants to change his image, he goes, I'm not this guy
33:26
that I'm perceived to be. You were that guy.
33:28
You were that guy. I feel like it's somewhat Rich's
33:31
fault because he kept setting him up with women.
33:34
Yeah, but for photo OPS, yeah, that's kind of normal for an
33:37
agent to do that. Yeah.
33:38
Like, you don't have to follow it through.
33:40
Idiot. Yeah, he's the one who's dumb
33:42
enough to think that they're like.
33:44
Yeah. It's like, OK, but also, you can
33:47
do these things gradually. Why does he want to do a full
33:50
180? Just because he wants to look
33:51
good to Stevie? Exactly.
33:54
At least call the man he didn't call Rich once.
33:57
And then Rich is like, I'm getting these reports.
33:59
Yeah. And then he's suddenly like,
34:02
Rich, you make me out to be this guy that I don't want to be.
34:04
Rich is like, you haven't called me in six months.
34:07
Fuck Rich, you know what I mean? Rich is still a bad guy.
34:09
Yeah, but it's not Rich's fault. Like give him a heads up that
34:12
you want to change your entire arse image because he's trying
34:15
to get you money and that was the whole point.
34:18
OK? So take a shot every time you
34:21
red blue-green eyes. And Hazel eyes was that?
34:25
Hazelnut curls and Hazel. I would be drunk.
34:29
And in the hospital? Are you following me?
34:32
Deceased. On the floor.
34:34
Poisoned, even. Blue-green eyes, Her blue-green
34:38
eyes, I'm. Sure, there was other things in
34:40
there on repeat. They actually.
34:43
Start. Hooking up and then of course
34:46
they've got to hide it. Can we talk about the non event
34:48
that was Stevie's ex-boyfriend? Was it Brett?
34:51
And what he did wasn't even that bad.
34:53
It was pretty bad. I don't think it was that bad.
34:56
He was using her. For her brother.
34:59
The connection. But he was already best friends
35:00
with the brother, so that's kind of a bit on the brother.
35:03
Yeah, but he would break up with her, go hook up with people and
35:06
then worm his way back. Yeah.
35:08
Which, OK, but she had the choice.
35:10
Like he wouldn't flat out cheat. I think from her mum, her
35:13
insecurities were so bad that she was thought that was the
35:16
only thing she was going to get though.
35:18
Oh. EW at Z Daddy Zanders as the.
35:23
Safe contact, wet emoji EW. Oh, filthy.
35:29
Filthy behaviour. Also, yeah, the amount of times
35:32
I heard Z&V. Fuck off.
35:35
They thought it was so cute. No like your.
35:38
Nickname's V My nickname's Z Isn't that cute?
35:41
Cool. Before they even officially were
35:44
starting to properly hook up and date, he had just magically
35:47
fixed herself esteem. It was disgusting.
35:51
I was like, cool, so just years of trauma is just gone.
35:53
Yeah, she was like, I just don't feel uncomfortable.
35:56
The depth of their relationship was just built on the fact that
36:00
she's not a gold digger like his mum.
36:02
Yeah, and laughing at her shitty jewelry like he was full.
36:06
Just bullying her about it and her thrifting.
36:08
Yeah. But he was also being like, hmm,
36:11
I'm not being used. It's like, OK, you.
36:13
Know it's really weird I like Stevie as a character not in
36:17
this book how are you going to write a really good somewhat
36:21
really good character Yep you have all the bass there and it's
36:24
like you also hate her at the same time it.
36:26
Started off OK. And then it just went down
36:29
really bad it. Went down when she was down.
36:33
Bad for Zanders. Yeah, I was like, great, now
36:36
she's boring. She was never gonna date Brett.
36:39
At least make him a temptation, Yes.
36:42
Or something to make you go, oh, is she gonna pick Yeah, Zanders?
36:46
Or is she gonna pick Brett? Yeah.
36:48
But it was absolutely like, I fucking hate Brett and Mum wants
36:50
me to go on a date with him and you know she's not gonna go on
36:53
the date. So, like, cool, cool.
36:55
What was the point of doing all that back story then?
36:57
Just say he was an asshole? Mm hmm.
36:59
Like what? So she finally tells Ryan all
37:02
about the Brett situation and he's just like, OK, I'm cutting
37:05
him out of my life as well. And also after that suck mom,
37:09
I'm practically going to cut her off as well.
37:12
I was like. You could have done this months
37:14
ago. Years even.
37:16
But it was weird. This is all after like the Dick
37:20
sizing contest at the gala. I think I must have skipped over
37:26
that. Did anything important happen?
37:28
No. It's just the way that audiobook
37:31
kept saying gala and gala, it was really driving me.
37:35
Gala. Nah, nothing happened.
37:37
Brett was just there. It was just a big song and dance
37:39
about how Zanders is actually the Co founder of the Oh
37:43
teenager. How dare.
37:44
He be a good person charity on the side I.
37:48
See. Well I don't understand this.
37:49
If he's doing all this in the background, how hard would it be
37:53
to pivot your PR image when your mate's already the family man?
37:56
Like it wouldn't be that hard. No one's going to the hockey
37:59
game and going. I want to see him fucking
38:01
pounding puss on the ice. Well, the comments.
38:03
What I paid for. Well the comments when it all
38:05
came out was that I only watch him 'cause I get to live through
38:08
him fucking everyone. Get a life.
38:11
Get over it. Watch porn.
38:14
Pick a porn star. Probably other hockey players
38:17
that are macho enough for you then or?
38:19
Pick a like 20 year old fresh hockey player that is still
38:25
fucking at 3028 to 30. If they're still doing that,
38:28
they need to grow up. It's embarrassing.
38:31
The first time they hook up she like after grinding at her at
38:35
her job. Side note, he was always
38:38
sexually assaulting her at her job.
38:42
They fuck, he has a great time, decides that's the best thing
38:44
he's ever had in his life. She gets stressed and that man
38:47
leaves naked and runs through the hotel.
38:50
Really. Yeah, OK.
38:53
They fuck and she's like leaving and he's like where are you
38:55
going? She's like I'm going now.
38:57
And he follows her naked and gets locked out of his hotel.
39:01
Were they in the same hotel because they were flying?
39:02
No places or so they kept putting the hockey ones in the
39:05
good hotel and then them in a ship hotel.
39:07
Yeah, LOL Was it the first scene where he was like wanting the
39:13
lights on and she didn't? Yes.
39:15
And I love how he just decided he goes, I just want you to know
39:18
that I wanna do this. Yeah.
39:20
And then internally his voice was like, I can't believe all
39:23
those little bitches didn't wanna eat her out.
39:25
And it's like, OK. Also, he's again, this isn't
39:28
about you and your ego against every man in the world.
39:30
Oh. And maybe she.
39:31
Doesn't like it. They're having sex too right
39:35
while they're mid fucking and he's like, it's actually so nice
39:38
to have some cushion between the hips.
39:40
Shut up. No, he's like, oh, it's actually
39:43
feels so much better with a little bit of pillow in there.
39:46
No no man's ever said that in their mind.
39:48
Ever. Also, is that the time?
39:50
Was it the first time that they rooted like 3 times?
39:53
Once, Once it was the next time that they did it like 3 times in
39:57
a row over the night and then somewhere in there.
40:01
She told him that she had an IUD or was on birth control or
40:04
something and then they just stopped using condoms.
40:06
It's like why? This man can bother them.
40:08
This man was fucking the state at this point.
40:11
They said at the start I'm clean and I'm clean.
40:14
It's like, yeah, but how? People.
40:16
Lie. People lie about how?
40:17
Recently did you get tested? She loves a good Tinder fuck and
40:21
so does he. Are you kidding?
40:23
Don't be like, oh, he learned. I was on an IUD.
40:25
So then we were just doing it raw like.
40:28
OK, what's the? Point.
40:29
Then. Is she going to be pregnant?
40:31
Is this, is this what we're leading to?
40:33
Because the other way, if you're going to put it in there, you
40:36
should only put it in there just in case they get pregnant down
40:39
the track. Yeah, I only want to hear about
40:41
it if there's going to be a surprise pregnancy at the end.
40:44
Don't pretend you care about safe sex.
40:47
No. Just at the start and then act
40:49
like as soon as she's a pygmy it doesn't matter.
40:52
If The thing is, if they're having so much sex, I'm just
40:54
going to assume they're all dogging it.
40:56
You don't actually need to tell me.
40:58
Exactly. Seeing as like condoms right in
41:01
the sex, seeing they kind of add to it.
41:03
You can do the like teasing, rolling down the penis shit, I
41:06
don't care. But you.
41:07
Don't. Rolling down the penis.
41:09
Roll that down the penis. Rolling down the.
41:14
Pain we love, a little sexy. I'm just saying you can add an
41:29
extra sentence in for it, but you don't need to do it every
41:32
time. I can just.
41:33
Assume we're assuming. I'm assuming, and then if
41:36
they're there for a year, I'm assuming they're all doggy like
41:39
everyone else. You don't even need to tell me
41:43
play by play. Yeah, that's the unnecessary
41:46
detail. Well, don't.
41:47
Say it in a way, like I told him I was on birth control so we're
41:51
off. Just be like, oh, he put it in
41:52
Roar or something. I don't know, do the opposite to
41:56
the condom. Just be like you put it in.
41:59
So they were at the gala and he was like go on a date and she's
42:03
like no I don't want to go on a date.
42:05
And then she disappeared for like 2 weeks.
42:08
Ballad. Pick Elaine.
42:10
Do you want to date him or not? But that was the only decision
42:13
she had in this book. Yeah, true it.
42:15
Was nothing else. But yeah, she was like the only
42:18
reason she started dating him again is because he adopted
42:21
Rosie. He was waiting for that moment
42:24
like he had it plotted out. I'm pretty sure the fucking Co
42:27
worker at the animal shelter would have mentioned that a
42:30
fucking world famous hockey player was in there every
42:33
single. Week, especially the one that
42:35
comes in with you every now and then.
42:37
Exactly like what? Come on, Cheryl.
42:41
Come on. Come on now, that'd.
42:43
Be the first thing I'd text you. The second he's in there I'd be
42:45
like. You're me, guy.
42:47
That you're flight attendant. Well, or I'd be like, say you
42:53
didn't know they were dating, right, because it is her boss.
42:56
Wouldn't you be like, oh, that guy you bring around is come
42:59
around to play with Rosie for a couple like.
43:02
As if he did, he did not. Yeah, he apparently was going
43:05
around once to twice a week for months for Rosie.
43:09
Four months. Four months.
43:10
So practically before they even met.
43:12
They were together for like a year before they got together.
43:17
This was like a year. They did not seem like they were
43:20
a year in. Yeah, they were so year all
43:23
together by the end. Of it, Oh yeah, yeah, by the end
43:26
of it I could kind of understand.
43:29
OK, so. Please explain to me.
43:32
So there must have been a day where, and this is when they
43:34
were proper, almost like pretty much dating because remember how
43:37
there was a phase where they're just spending so much time
43:40
together and they're all lovey dovey?
43:41
Yeah, blah, blah. And then she saw his list of
43:45
girls. And then every city had her in
43:48
it. Fucking.
43:49
Scroll back more idiot. We want the team.
43:52
I think he cleared it and only put her in there.
43:54
Oh. That's convenient.
43:55
Or he's got a separate list. Because she was like oh he he.
43:58
Even Zanders manages to make being a fuck boy adorable bitch.
44:03
You didn't see the real list? This shit had an expiry or
44:07
something. This shit was archived.
44:09
Imagine seeing the real list and there's like 20 girls in each.
44:13
And it's like 2, it's like 2019, two, 1020.
44:18
The roster be rostering. He's not.
44:20
Even in his prime, he's ready to retire.
44:22
He's an old man. You're getting him when he's
44:25
about to go out to pasture and you're sitting there thinking.
44:28
This man's only panicking now because he's on his way out of
44:31
your retirement. Like what is he going to do
44:34
exactly? Sit on the sideline and watch
44:36
his friends every night? Disgusting.
44:40
And she's sitting there going. No one understands him like I.
44:44
Do no. I don't think even those girls
44:46
in his DMS want to understand. Him no they don't give a fuck.
44:50
Also I'm assuming with how he treated her on the first like
44:52
couple of chapters he would be no better.
44:55
He isn't. He didn't even.
44:56
Kiss. I feel like having sex without
44:59
kissing would be fucking boring. He's just like turning around.
45:03
Put it in doggy. He doesn't even know your name,
45:06
girl. Oh.
45:06
My God. He doesn't even know your
45:08
Instagram handle. Can we talk about when she must
45:12
have been staying over one day and then apparently he had a
45:15
full spectrum, she said of different sized clothing items.
45:20
Just to, you know, attend to her body dysmorphia, bitch.
45:24
Absolutely not because my paranoid ass brain would be like
45:28
these are from all his other hearts.
45:30
Yeah. The full spectrum of sizes is
45:32
because every other bitch has been in this guy's.
45:34
Apartment. Yeah.
45:36
Well, so why do you need all 5 sizes exactly?
45:39
Find out. Take a guess.
45:40
I'm like, find out what she's wearing now she's naked in your
45:43
house all the time. Just pick up some pants and then
45:45
buy one before 1 after. Exactly, because imagine if you
45:50
got sizes like I'm thinking Australian size 6 to size 22 and
45:54
you just went up in increments and then you just laid them all
45:57
out. Like when you say full spectrum,
45:58
I'm thinking the full wardrobe babe.
46:00
Yeah, just get medium. No one will get up you for
46:06
getting medium. No one will get up you.
46:09
I don't know. I don't know.
46:12
You could be smart. He's rich.
46:13
It doesn't matter. Get.
46:14
Stretchy pants though, like if they're track pants, get a
46:17
medium. But that's why she liked it,
46:19
because he didn't try awkwardly guess her weight.
46:22
And women's sizing is never the same the same anyway.
46:27
What a dream. He just goes and buys some moo
46:29
moo. Yeah, not that you'd care.
46:34
Let's get one of those one size booties.
46:37
Well, they we get thrift shopping together so and she was
46:39
trying. To do a bit of investigation, my
46:42
guy, open up. The only thing in investigated
46:45
was her ring size so. I would be madman.
46:52
I'd be like, okay, so how many bitches have been in here?
46:56
This is like 10 different business.
46:57
Sizes like at least one Why do they smell?
47:02
So finally this all comes to the forefront.
47:06
The actual issue being he's has to keep this relationship a
47:10
secret. Yeah, they fuck all night and
47:11
then it's like, whoa, whoa, actually.
47:14
And. So finally get back together and
47:16
then they fuck all night and then it's just a break up again.
47:18
Oh, too many breakups and. The dumb thing is they're
47:22
breaking up for no reason, so the.
47:24
The. Paparazzi who gets a photo of
47:27
the back of her body and you can see her chestnut curls.
47:30
Damn. And then he's on speed dial with
47:32
Rich going like this shit needs to be deleted.
47:34
Rich says not. Rich has not answered.
47:36
Rich has had enough. Rich set it up.
47:39
Are you kidding? Yeah.
47:39
Why would? Rich delete it.
47:41
No, but also who cares also? And Tara's like, I know they're
47:45
your chestnut girls. OK, stalker.
47:47
OK, girl, did you take some cuttings?
47:50
What do you mean she's out there in the back?
47:54
Like with her little snippet of her cuttings.
47:56
Like let's. Use matches.
47:58
Let's be real, Tara is the paparazzi just stalking them
48:01
anyway. Who cares?
48:03
But I'm like, oh, they break up. And it's not even that they
48:06
needed to, right? Oh, the most unneeded breakup of
48:09
the center. Lack of communication.
48:12
All you used to do is communicate.
48:14
I know this because the dialogue is too dialoguy.
48:17
You're telling me she's crying in bed and he's like oh I'll
48:21
just let her go home but she's actually crying in bed for him
48:23
not her. She's like I don't care that
48:26
these people are telling me to go UN alive myself literally but
48:31
she's worried that they think he's a different person.
48:34
Exactly what the fuck, That's what you wanted?
48:37
And he's sitting there thinking she's crying because she's a big
48:39
fat fatty on the bat. Razi photo It's not even the
48:43
case. And then?
48:44
He's like, Oh no, she's practically going to kill
48:47
herself. So what's a better thing to add
48:50
to this mix? Let's add a break up.
48:52
It's just add a break. I'm.
48:53
Just going to walk over there and be like, I actually never
48:55
liked you. You were never my choice anyway.
48:58
Like. What?
48:59
Stop it. Why?
49:02
Why you like? What is the point?
49:05
What is if? She didn't want to kill herself
49:07
already, she does now after. I imagine the Internet trolls
49:10
being like he should be with a supermodel or something.
49:14
He should be with Gigi Hadid. Like imagine all that in the
49:17
comments and it's just the back of you.
49:19
The back is the worst angle to have a photo of.
49:22
You could have the most juiciest ass and it would still look like
49:26
a box ass. I swear.
49:28
From the back. Yeah.
49:29
Do you know what I mean? Like that angle when you're
49:31
assuming. They're wearing big coats too
49:33
because it's like winter and everything as well.
49:35
So all you could see was a big coat and girls, yes.
49:39
So why would anyone even be saying that much?
49:41
You could be shaming shit. You could be.
49:43
Anyone. That's what I mean.
49:44
Tariff. Are we not surprised though?
49:46
I feel like she now bled on the head because I'm banned from
49:49
reading anything with sports players in it and their
49:51
girlfriends because they body shame the shit out of their
49:55
girlfriends. Wow, I could not be a WAG.
49:59
No. That's for sure.
50:00
And for the money. The sad thing is, she doesn't
50:02
even get to sit with the WAG. She has to sit off to the side
50:05
and Logan sits with her like a charity case, even though she's
50:11
going to every game of the season like sitting off in the
50:13
nosebleeds because on, OK, sorry, maybe if you're Brad
50:18
Pitt. No one's that famous.
50:23
Pissed me off. It pissed me off.
50:25
It was more about Rich and actually caring what Rich settle
50:28
was, sort of. And then the next day they're on
50:29
a plane and he's like, please look at me.
50:31
No, you did this. This is your.
50:35
Fault. And he wants her to be nice and
50:37
just bantering back and forth and she, why would she do?
50:40
That exactly to just hurt her. Own feelings.
50:44
She even went to the back and started crying herself.
50:47
Yeah and Rio came and talked to her and he was like oh shit.
50:50
Like he no one knew they broke up.
50:52
Like he didn't even give the team a heads up to not harass
50:55
her. Also, you wanted to be quiet,
50:57
why are you yelling it in a bar? Hmm yeah that was awkward as
51:01
fuck cause your brother was there.
51:03
And yeah, no and. He was like, I have.
51:06
A girlfriend like he's like. Hopefully no one hears it.
51:11
You are in a sports bar. Hmm.
51:14
And he could have just said it on the download of Rio, like
51:16
actually, I don't want to go talk to those two girls that are
51:19
thirsting because. Yeah, also what I hate in books
51:23
all the time, they'll have like a sibling around, right?
51:26
And they're basically humping each other in front of the
51:28
sibling, and the siblings are always like the.
51:30
Things that they were saying and I'm like, who would do that?
51:33
No one. Who does that?
51:34
No one does that. Put it in your pants for five.
51:36
Even Ryan was saying I'm still her brother, I'm still here.
51:39
Hello. I'm still a person.
51:41
And he was talking about how he literally.
51:44
Tastes. Oh my God, he was literally
51:46
fingering her in front of Ryan at this point.
51:48
EW, and not only that's your twin brother.
51:51
Yeah, that's even worse. I feel like if you had a big age
51:53
gap, you'd be like, OK, that's my immature younger sibling.
51:57
Just. Being gross.
51:58
Hooking up like they're twins, not.
52:00
And they're not 20. Like they're not exactly 18.
52:03
Year olds, they're not 18 year olds in the clear.
52:06
Embarrassing, embarrassing. But not only does he say he's
52:09
not going to wing man for Rio and then say.
52:12
I've got a girlfriend. And then like 5 seconds later
52:15
dumps dumps dumps her though, after all, making a big deal
52:21
about it. Yeah, about like I don't get
52:23
wiped up and shit. It's like OK, dumps her.
52:26
Yeah, people just mean like I have a girlfriend and not that I
52:29
have a girlfriend and it's her. You need to point it out.
52:33
This is the point where I really got lost in the source because
52:35
he didn't need to break up with her.
52:38
No one cheated. We're already like 500 pages in.
52:42
It's too much. It's too much.
52:45
He's crawling back every day, begging on his knees, not
52:48
crying. Essentially, he decides.
52:50
That she's gonna quit. Yeah.
52:52
The job which? That was funny.
52:54
She was afraid of in the 1st place.
52:56
So you're telling me she could have just quit at any point?
52:58
Yeah, and then a different flight attendant just rocks up
53:01
and he's like, who the fuck are you?
53:02
And. Wildly enough to she moves so
53:06
she's not even going to be out the shelter anyway when she.
53:08
Could have just got a different job.
53:09
Exactly. So now she's full trying to get
53:12
away from this man. Which valid because he's a bit
53:14
of a stalker. Yeah, but you just went against
53:16
the whole reason why you were so scared to date him.
53:19
Yes, your boss gets fired at the same time as you quitting as
53:23
well. So what was the fucking point
53:24
exactly? Nothing.
53:26
Also with Tara, you're telling me they're not allowed to fuck
53:29
around with the players? That's her rule.
53:31
These are all on this one plane. There's literally nowhere you
53:35
can go without you seeing the other person, and you don't see
53:38
her up in everyone's grill. I would report to her like no
53:42
tomorrow. Exactly.
53:44
I just feel like there was one point where she was down in
53:46
Xander's face. Tits in his face.
53:48
Reporter, I think. What is she going to do?
53:50
Stevie is so siloed on fucking Sanders and yeah, she just
53:56
doesn't. She turned into the biggest
53:57
pygmy at the end. But then so did Indy a little
54:00
bit too. The like you had a hot girl in
54:03
your apartment. OK, cool, you were also crying
54:07
from a breakup if you're gonna hit on you.
54:09
Her brother seemed like a responsible person, at least.
54:12
She was trashed when she was saying that, though.
54:14
Yeah, because she was having a breakup Bender.
54:16
Yeah. And then she had dated that guy
54:17
for six whole years and so balls deep in someone.
54:20
So you'd probably be trying to gas yourself up at the end of.
54:23
The book she randomly moves in four months later with Ryan?
54:27
That makes no sense, no. And she's just.
54:29
Like why is your brother hot? Because Stevie's hot, dar.
54:32
They're twins. I think it would have been
54:34
funnier if she actually went along with Rio.
54:37
Yeah, Instead I thought, OK, hear me out, hear me out.
54:41
I was like, it's either gonna be Ryan in Indy or Rio, because
54:44
there's a bit where she makes a joke about groping balls or
54:48
something and Rio's like, oh, you could do me.
54:50
And she says no and walks past him.
54:52
And I was like, that makes sense also, but it's not him.
54:55
But he was so thirsty about her later when he found out that she
54:57
was single. Yes.
54:58
And he was like desperately trying to get with her and I.
55:01
Loved it and but it's not going to be him so.
55:03
Yeah, and I knew the second she was over at the apartment that
55:06
it was going to be Ryan. And I was like boring.
55:08
Boring. Would it be funnier if it was
55:10
Tara and Ryan that would have been?
55:15
Love. That like a whole tar and
55:17
redemption. I want.
55:19
You know. She's so stalker it's so hard
55:22
that she's actually the villain in Ryan's book too.
55:26
It's like a thriller. For Roman, I'm like.
55:29
Well why not? She has like 50 villains in the
55:32
I would. Love it because it seems like
55:33
she's obsessed with Stevie. So imagine if she saw a male
55:36
Stevie and she actually is straight.
55:37
Yeah. She'd be like, oh, who's this?
55:39
Like one day stalking Stevie. How funny it would be if she was
55:43
trying to get with Ryan but Ryan never got with her and then he
55:45
got with someone better. I feel like that would be
55:47
funnier. Fuck Tara.
55:48
I like. Idea of Tara just being like
55:50
this anti hero this. Evil.
55:53
Yeah. Yeah.
55:54
I want to know what's going on in that noggin because, like, at
55:58
least she seemed to have a bit of character to her at a point.
56:01
Yeah, we got more oomph out of her than we did from Stevie from
56:05
the. Entire second book she's
56:07
actually literally waiting in the lobby for her lobby.
56:11
Why is she like? Why is she doing?
56:14
Why is she? Like why are you toe tapping
56:15
staring at the door? Nobody cares.
56:19
You're not even the like CEO of the flight attendant.
56:22
Company. It's a fart.
56:24
No back story, her dad is the CEO.
56:27
Oh, and he's like trying to knuckle in on the employees.
56:30
Yeah, yeah. And then this is her first
56:32
chance being a manager. Yeah.
56:33
So she really needs to make it work for her dad to prove that
56:36
she can step up as being, like, a mini CEO.
56:39
But also, like, there's a lot at stake.
56:41
There's a lot that's stating but also on the side she's low key
56:44
doing lines with the pilot on the plane also.
56:46
Yeah, the Paris Hilton like trying to have a fun some time
56:49
but also wanting to inherit the company.
56:51
But also like she would be in the pilots area all the time.
56:54
How much do they need? Yeah.
56:56
They're flying. Yeah, they're driving.
56:58
Be for real. Be for real.
57:00
Be for real. If Xander's up in that cockpit,
57:03
you better believe he'll be like wearing out the call button.
57:06
Oh my God. But also, if you want to
57:08
fraternize with the players, why don't you swap with Stevie?
57:11
Put her in the front. Yeah.
57:13
You won't see her at. All now maybe she's getting with
57:16
the pilots. I feel like she's doing the
57:18
most. She's doing something.
57:20
She maybe the fraternizing was with the pilots.
57:22
Yeah, she's actually having threesomes in the front.
57:25
Wouldn't be surprised. Good for her.
57:26
It's. Just on autopilot.
57:29
Fair this book had. Nothing it.
57:31
Had nothing it. Was gone nowhere.
57:33
It was repetitive. It was long.
57:35
It was predictable as fuck. I just don't see the depth in
57:40
why they. For such a big book, there
57:44
should have been so much fun. She was mad in love with him.
57:46
She was willing to excuse him for anything.
57:48
She was willing to move anywhere, too.
57:51
And she said that multiple times.
57:52
And then he's just kind of like settling.
57:55
Yeah. For her, I guess.
57:57
Yeah, I don't. Know and the sex scenes were
57:59
very much like zero to 100. Yeah.
58:02
It'd be like, Oh yeah, da da da. Well, the last I want.
58:05
You to come in my mouth. Yeah.
58:08
It'd be like nothing and then it'd be like her glistening
58:11
brown pussy and I'm just like. You know what's easy into it?
58:15
Easy into it, but also wild wild contradiction of her character.
58:19
Exactly you're. Gonna have a really insecure
58:21
character that can't have sex with the lights on, but she's
58:24
like coming out with all this dirty talk.
58:26
Like exactly. And also keep her lame when you
58:30
know her shitty non friends which didn't need to be a side
58:33
track as well. Yeah, they came to her apartment
58:36
one day, she was full pounding her own puss with the purple
58:39
vibrator. Yeah, she answered the door .5
58:42
seconds later. What?
58:44
And it just gets stressed. It was a dildo, babes.
58:47
It was in there. And then she just gets stressed.
58:51
She doesn't have a shower, she just gets dressed.
58:52
That's. What I mean, but it sounded like
58:53
they were like knock, knock, knock, and the thing's still
58:56
fucking on and then she just opens.
58:57
The door and died and that's why she threw it across the room,
59:00
but also. You clean it.
59:02
You know what? No, the clean is.
59:04
Moist on the ground. No, that's fine, that's fine.
59:07
The problem is how do you know you're going out with friends
59:10
but you aren't? Can't check the time.
59:12
Exactly. Why are you?
59:14
Leaving. Are you that?
59:16
Are you that? Dildoing just.
59:18
Very last. I'm like, it's you're organised,
59:20
I said. You don't care about getting
59:22
ready that much at all, but you. Honestly, did she just?
59:26
Puts a little mini skirt and. Girl, you're still dripping.
59:30
You're just gonna. Put on a mini.
59:32
Skirt like I'm just hardcore dildoing yourself like Oh my
59:36
God. Who?
59:37
Wrote this book Am I in? I don't think it's just.
59:41
Oh it nothing makes sense. And also, why is everything
59:43
purple? The mesh G string is purple, the
59:46
dildo's purple. Actually in saying that
59:48
everything in my house is this colour purple.
59:50
Oh OK, like I'm AI like gully. Yeah, my bed, my cord, your
59:56
dildo. No, your.
59:58
Mesh, G string, you're like no real things.
1:00:03
Real I No, I don't know if I like the mesh anymore, you know?
1:00:06
That's just asking for a yeastie at this point.
1:00:09
It's just a lot of friction. Yeah, lot of polyesterol A.
1:00:14
Lot of catching. And a lot of like non
1:00:17
absorbency. You just had a hard dildoing
1:00:20
session. You're screwed.
1:00:21
Nah, you are so screwed. You're just like free flowing at
1:00:26
the club later. You're snail trailing in at the
1:00:29
club. That's why Xander found it.
1:00:31
He was like. Wouldn't be.
1:00:34
Surprised. Because he was like, she's so
1:00:36
sweet. And it's like, oh God.
1:00:38
Relax. It's giving honeydew.
1:00:42
OK, You don't know what I'm talking about because you
1:00:44
haven't read it. There's a book where he's like,
1:00:46
you taste like honeydew. It's a fantasy book and it's
1:00:48
like, can't. Imagine it.
1:00:49
Yeah, that's all I need to know. Yeah, you don't need to know
1:00:52
anything else. OK so I literally it was a non
1:00:57
event but they got back together obviously obviously and then
1:01:00
they were just both future faking.
1:01:04
The end, The end. I'm like Rich.
1:01:08
Apparently he's been getting offers all season and he just
1:01:10
wanted more and more money. You're on the way out, you're
1:01:13
only going to get so much more. You're not at your peak, You're
1:01:15
in the penalty box every 5 minutes.
1:01:17
I'm like, you're strapping your knee every night.
1:01:19
Be for real. Exactly be for fucking real.
1:01:20
You're crickety crack front and back.
1:01:22
You're like, not OK. You're rolling out of bed
1:01:28
assisted. You're.
1:01:32
Rolling out of bed walking frame.
1:01:35
I'm like. You've got.
1:01:36
A hoist to my guy. Hoisted and toisted.
1:01:40
Hoisted and wasted. All right, So what should we
1:01:44
rate this one out of? Are you following me, do you
1:01:47
reckon? How many?
1:01:51
Yeah. Any stage 5 clingers?
1:01:53
Yeah. Yeah.
1:01:54
What? What would you give it?
1:01:56
A1 Oh, I don't even think I want to give it a one.
1:02:00
What are you thinking? I look I put 2 at the start.
1:02:06
The problem is the more you talk about it out loud, the more you
1:02:09
realize, yeah, I do that with every book.
1:02:13
I'll come in here and I'll be like, oh, it's a four.
1:02:14
And then we talk about it. I'm like a. 1 A1 disgusting
1:02:22
because we just bitches. It just degrades as we talk
1:02:25
about it more. I don't know if.
1:02:26
Well, it's us. I think it's when you realize
1:02:29
certain things, like when you're having a conversation with
1:02:32
someone, you're like, actually, there was no plot in this book.
1:02:35
No. Where's the plot?
1:02:36
There was no plot. There was no.
1:02:38
Character. Development.
1:02:38
There was no character development.
1:02:40
Why do we have like 50 villains doing nothing?
1:02:44
They're not doing enough. It wasn't high stakes enough.
1:02:46
No, I will give it a 2. Are you following me?
1:02:51
He's out of five. Yeah.
1:02:52
Because 2 means it was OK. And that's OK, because it was OK
1:02:55
at the start, yeah. But I very much tuned out from
1:02:58
maybe 60% onwards, yeah, because I was like, I know exactly how
1:03:02
this is going to go. It's just too much.
1:03:04
Too much and not enough all. Right, cannot write a book.
1:03:06
So that's it for Mile High, Did they?
1:03:09
Even join the Mile High club. No miles high.
1:03:13
So pissed. She was literally like, I'm not
1:03:15
having a sex on the plane. Yeah, so what's a point?
1:03:18
Why'd you call it that, Lady Liz?
1:03:21
At least they were up in the air.
1:03:24
Like it's the thing I hated the most, but it's worse.
1:03:26
Than the fine print with the Disneyland on the front.
1:03:28
Now they never like went to Disneyland.
1:03:31
The stopover was the worst because it wasn't surely the fly
1:03:35
high baby. She's.
1:03:37
Not I'm so sorry. I had to add that into the intro
1:03:41
just so that you would. Fucking.
1:03:43
Pisses me off. Dead daily.
1:03:45
Daily. No, not.
1:03:46
Say hi baby. Thanks for joining us on Lose
1:03:49
the Plot with Carla and Emily. Don't forget to rate US five
1:03:52
stars and subscribe if you enjoyed slide into our DMS on
1:03:55
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