Latest / Sutra Squad / Ep. 18 - Sutra 1.23 On the Only Shortcut in Yoga

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Ep. 18 - Sutra 1.23 On the Only Shortcut in Yoga · Sutra Squad

• Seth Barron: The difference in religion and spirituality, think, is religion is a prescribed set of beliefs where spirituality is a deep curiosity into something bigger than ourselves. Hello and welcome to the Sutra Squad podcast brought to you by One Deep Breath. My name is Seth Barron. I am here with the superstar Sutra Squad, Sally Moore. Welcome. And Sarah Page Hall. Hey there. What is one word that describes how you feel right now, Miss Sally Moore? I am feeling a little scattered. ⁓ All over the place. That's it. Okay. Okay. Sarah Page? Grounded. That just popped into my head. I'm feeling grounded. Grounded. Mm-hmm. I am feeling a little pressed. feeling a little pressed. Like I feel pressure. Not like overwhelming, but like, ⁓ there's that feeling again. Haven't felt that in a minute. And there it is. Funny. just had this thing jump in my head. If we put how all of us are feeling together right now, do you know what I, the visual is have you ever driven or walked past the car dealership where there's that big blow up with their feet on the ground and they're just like, that's us. That's it. My feet are on the ground. Feet are on the ground. 100. You're the center and then you're one up in the top. I kind of like that. I'm into it. I'm into it. like, you know, I think if there's anything we want to role model in this, if I don't know, I don't know I'm a role model for anybody. But in this regard, I think that like at least part of what we hope to do is be authentic and human. Like, you know, I think part of what has drawn us together and what we hope to offer in this space is that like, you know, it's like perfecting, like there's like, and we're not perfect yogis. Like, I don't know what that is or who that is and where that is. You know, we show up to this work just like we show up to the mat, which is like as we are. And, and, and that. And that if anything, what we take off when we walk in metaphorically or sometimes literally like what we take off is I think this is true for all three of us as teachers ⁓ and as students because like there's no difference. ⁓ Take off the performance so that we can really get so curious to who this is right now. Right. Like who is this staff who shows up to do this? And it's not the same as when it's over. No, it's not. It never is. Never is. And that's so beautiful about this study. I I just, I love this so much. And part of why I love like, you know, this is heart work for us. Every time we come back to these words, where we bring everything from where we've been to where we are, and it doesn't mean that we let it determine, but it... But there's this just the curiosity of that is a space in which there's so much possibility. And I love that, I think that's part of our collective intention is to let all of that be, not have it be perfect, right? It's not a perfect, it's a practice. ⁓ But it's a practice. It's a practice and it's a practice and we've talked about this in the last couple of weeks. As we've been exploring the first chapter of the Yoga Sutra, the chapter on the Samadhipada, we've looked at the sort of opening trilogy of this essential, essential, essential truth of the now of yoga, the definition of yoga as the restraint or the bringing to stillness of the movement of consciousness in that way that you you bring a baby to stillness by swaddling it. I'm still so into that like reference point to the term that really shifted something big for me when we went through it in the most recent conversation. that what arises, what that gives space to is this deeply authentic expression of self. And then we looked at the two sides of this coin around this idea of like, how do you do that and that's Abhyasa and Vairagya, right? Abhyasa, Vairagya, the means by which we achieve that state of yoga is practice, which is described as steadfast, dedicated, committed, without interruption for a long period of time. And Vairagya, the renunciation of sense gratification. Right? That detachment means to let go of the sensory validation and gratification and instead glimpse into the nature of the divine, the purusa. Tat parampurusa gunavaitrisnyam. Did I get the whole thing right off the top of my head? Yes. Sounded good to me. Yeah, I do. Right? Now I'm checking one. That parampurusa creater guna vaitrisinam. Right? like, in that, like once we harness the senses and begin the journey of like transcending them, is the way, is that sense then that we can begin to see or perceive spiritual truth. So we're gonna go deeper. Yeah, we're gonna go deeper because today we're gonna look at a series of sutras. sometimes we do one, sometimes we'll do a series when they're deeply connected and try to use that as a way to understand some of these really big ideas. So in this case, we're gonna talk about God. And before we go much further than that, it's always really important to me when we begin to have a conversation about the very deep spiritual practice of yoga, to be very clear about a couple of things. First, yoga is not a religion. I'm gonna say that a couple of times. Yoga is not a religion. Yoga has its history and context in a religious lineage, which is Hinduism, or sometimes it's also said it's Sanatana Dharma, the forever Dharma. So yoga has its, roots, its context is in Sanatana Dharma, is in Hinduism, and yoga is not Hinduism. It does not require you to be Hindu, to explore yoga philosophy. And the difference in religion and spirituality, I think, is religion is a prescribed set of beliefs where spirituality is a deep curiosity into something bigger than ourselves. That's just my take. I'm not presenting that as canonical. Sounds good. And thank you, Sarah Page. ⁓ But I think that while understandably a lot of yoga is presented in the US in a very secular context, I also personally just believe that without any discussion of the spirituality of what it means to be up to something bigger than yourself, it's set in some lineages. In our shared lineage of Baptiste Yoga, that's often a frame used. ⁓ you know, one of the organizing principles of the body, sort of like alignment, like the organizing principles of true north alignment in Baptiste Yoga is be intentional about creating the physical foundation of the pose and being up to something bigger than yourself. Well, that's often presented in a very, I think again, like secular context. It's also important to be clear about, like, it has a spiritual context. and its roots, its history, this philosophy has a spiritual context. And part of the beauty, though, is that, like, and what we, what's challenging for us who come to this from an Abrahamic, Islamo-Judeo-Christian background, right? Like, I was raised in a Jewish home, Sarah Page was raised Christian, and, like, and Sally's our, resident. ⁓ like sometimes Jewish semi-agnostic. She floats. She floats. Right? But especially when you grow up and your cultural entrainment is from the perspective of those religious lineages, one thing that tends to be a through line is that there's a sense of God as in any of those presentations, that there's like a right answer, one specific answer to what is God. And Sanatana Dharma and Hinduism actually, like, you know, there are many, many expressions of the divine and of, and I didn't get this at first, and I think it's presented to little Jewish kids as, idol worship or somehow, like, polytheism in a way that is sometimes, there's all kinds of weird semi-racist, like, context in the way I think some of that is taught in the West, but, like, that's, again, just another opinion. We all got them. ⁓ But like, it's like, how can Shiva and Durga and ⁓ Vishnu and Brahma like and Krishna all be God and they're all God and they're all God. They're all gods and they're all God. And like they sort of presented as like, so that can't be right, can it? And we have to like gear shift a little bit here. I think to understand and get really intentional about that, again, this is a spiritual practice. And as we start talking about God, there are attributes of God that we can begin to understand, but there is not a right answer, a single right answer to God or to the identity or to the specific manifestation of God. Can I share one thing? Yes, will you please? was going to say like, do you guys want to share anything on that? I struggled with this. And I have to be honest, in the past five or six years that we've been studying this, I just skipped this one. didn't teach it. I couldn't say it in the room. I didn't know how to manage it. And then I came across two lines from Inside Pachonjali's Word by Reverend Jagannath Carrera, and it shifted. So now I can talk about it. And it said, think of Ishvara. as a screen upon which any name from the divine can be projected. And wherever the devotee perceives the qualities of Ishvara, that is Ishvara for him, her, they. I added the qualities. And later I think we're going to talk about the qualities. Exactly. freed me up so much. There's so much freedom there. And what I was going to say, Seth, you were talking about how can Shiva, Durga, Brahman, Krishna all be God. Well, in the Christian everything, it's the Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost, you know, and it's all God. It's, know, and we all try to make, and what we, I love what you said about the spirituality, but we're also scared of talking about our spirituality. Everybody has you know, has the center and it's okay. I mean, I'm a Christian. I've always been very clear that I'm a Christian. I don't have a problem with that any more than I have a problem with that. My friends are borderline agnostic kind of Jewish or Jewish, you know, or Catholic. My birth is these days when I say, but yeah. Yeah, right. But you know what I mean? Like, or Hindu. I don't have an issue with that. And I don't think that we should be afraid to mention our spirituality and being comfortable in that. I think that we're called to that as yogis, actually. And I think that there's a way to do that in a way. part of what we're going to talk about that I find so much freedom, so much meaning, and so much continued depth is that it's radically inclusive. And our intention here is to be radically inclusive. what I want to just... The last thing I'll say on this is that, please don't run away. No matter what... what you believe, you are welcome. We want you to stay here with us in this question and be curious together. And that if you're Muslim, if you're Christian, if you're Jewish, if you are born into Sanatana Dharma and Hinduism, Buddhism, Jain, Sikh, great. Thank you for welcoming us in so many ways. You know, something I took so beautifully from the experiences we had in some really very holy places in India was just that, like, I never got a, I never felt a weird side eye of being a white guy in those spaces. I felt like it was just like, ⁓ welcome, wonderful, glad you're here. And whatever you take from it is yours to take. that like, and I'm sure there's people in India who have all kinds of things to say. And like, I get that too. But our intention in the presentation of these ideas, of this idea that we're gonna talk about of like, what is God? And what does it mean to surrender to God? And how do we begin to have a personal relationship with God? That's what we're getting at. So any relationship, we're here for it. And the- We're the I would say like you and your beliefs are welcome here. And whatever they feel like. And whenever you get really curious. Maybe you get really curious and it's something you've never spoken to and all of sudden you're able to go, you know, I do feel that way and it's okay. And we're here for it and you were glad you're here for it. So the verse is specifically, it's 123, it's the 23rd verse or sutra in the Samadhi Pada and it just goes, and sometimes it's also like, I like to say it's the only shortcut. there's one shortcut and it's this text. Ishvara pranidhanad va. Ishvara pranidhanadva. I'm gonna chant it three times, so just let that wash over you. If you know the words, sing along at home. We're gonna start by just taking a moment to be still and you could bring your hands together in front of your chest, just as a gesture of devotion. And to what you're devoting yourself is entirely yours. and any object of your devotion is worthy and welcome. Take a deep breath in. and a deep breath out. And if you like and you're able, can join me for one vibration of om. Inhale. Chanting Yoga Sutra 123. Ishvara pranidhana dva. Ishvara pranidhana dva. Ishvara pranidhana dva. So generally speaking, the translation of this verse is, or you could surrender everything to the divine. And different scholars have given different interpretations and expressions of that statement, but it also comes back to this idea that there's this something bigger than yourself, and that's Ishvara. And it's really interesting. Ishvara is usually translated back into English as God. And it's tricky, because then we project. all this stuff onto that word. that, you know, Sally quoted Reverend Jagannath Carrera, who writes really beautifully about this, inside Patanjali's words. And there's one paragraph of his that I also really, it really calls to my heart, and I'm just gonna read it directly. In Hinduism, interpretations of what Ishvara is may differ, but they share the sense that Ishvara as the cosmic governing force and intelligence of the universe, master and lord over all that is valuable. The lordship of Ishvara extends to the individual self as well as to the entirety of the universe. Here it is. Any name and form of the divine can be taken as Ishvara for the sincere devotee. Any name and form of the divine. can be taken as Ishvara for the sincere devotee. So the first really important point to make here is that Ishvara, it's not this translation of God as like that, this one thing and this is the right answer. Ish is the root, is to rule, to command, own, be valid, to be master of, to reign among its meanings. And Vara, valuable, eminent, this is the one I love, choicest, choicest. And then most excellent or eminent from Vr is a root of Sanskrit, which means to choose. So, The first thing is that we hear this word God and we project a story onto it or we project something onto it because of our cultural entrainment. But the word itself in the Sanskrit is not, and fascinatingly, also, Master Patanjali in this text does not give any other name for the divine besides Ishvara. It's not Krishna, it's not Shiva, it's not Durga, it's not Kali, it's just Ishvara. So there's this sense that it's like the ruler that is the choicest, that is the most attractive to any and each one of us and any one of those to whom we can place sincere devotion is valid and real. And that, when I first was exposed to that idea, that like I get to choose, like blew my mind. So before we go to like the rest of this verse, The next several verses describe the nature, the attributes of Ishvara. And I think it's useful here to like pull this apart a little and look at it in a slightly different order, especially because we have a lot to unwind around this idea of God, right? I do. That's something I'll speak from. I have a lot to unwind. So now I'm gonna reference the translations from Sri Swami Satyajit Ananda, the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. ⁓ He says, or Samadhi is attained by devotion with total dedication to Ishvara. Then, 24, Ishvara is the supreme purusa. So if you remember, I'm not gonna go into the whole thing, but there's the material energy of the world, prakriti, and there's the spiritual energy, which is purusa. So Ishvara is the supreme purusa, unaffected by any afflictions, actions, fruits of actions or by any inner impressions of others. Okay, so now if we are to start to understand the supreme spiritual energy of the universe of like what makes for Ishvara, it's unaffected by afflictions, actions, fruits of actions, or by any inner impressions of desires. Like Ishvara is what it is. with or without you, with or without me. And it's unaffected. In this case, it's really understood like it's unaffected by karma. Karma just means action. that like Ishvara is this thing that like rises above all of that circumstance of action. Then verse 25, in Ishvara is the complete manifestation of the seed of omniscience or it sometimes said that Ishvara is the seed of all knowledge. Okay, so Ishvara is like unconditioned by action. Ishvara is the ultimate seed from which all knowledge can bear fruit. And then I love this one, unconditioned by time. This is 126, unconditioned by time. Ishvara is the teacher of even the most ancient teachers. Ishvara is unconditioned by time, the teacher of even the most ancient teachers. Okay, so now let's stitch this together a little bit, okay? Ishvara pranidahanadvah. So we know, like we can start to wrap our head a little bit around this idea that Ishvara is unconditioned by our material action of karma and samskara, past impression, is the source from which all knowledge arises and is unconditioned by time, right? That like, that literally like it was, it is, it will be. Okay, that's Ishvara. Then let's go back a little bit and look at pranidhanadva. Pra is a root for before or in front. And ni is down into or within. And the root dha, dharana, right, which is one of the limbs of yoga that we'll get to later, but it means to place your attention with intention. Same root, dha, right, pranidhana. And it's useful because we're going to come back to this word because it shows up several places. It shows up here. It shows up at the beginning of the second chapter. It shows up in the the ne-yamas. Like this is a big idea. So now it's like, okay, so we know that there's this sense of God as unconditioned by action, as unconditioned by time, as the seed of all knowledge and that it is before and in front and in, it is placed before and in front of us. and in within us. And if you think about that literal physical action of like before and within, you start to bow, you like literally start to bow down. You put before and within you, right? If you think about that, it's a physical action. If you think about that placement. So we said that like each, like this is translated as, or you could just surrender everything to God. There's the sense of surrender, the bowing down before and within. And the last thing is, and this just rocked me, it's so beautiful. I think we tend to take this study from a perspective of a belief that Master Patanjali meant every single word and every word in the sequence of the words and the sequence of the verses all is rich with meaning and none of it is by accident. It's all intentional. It's all worthy of study. So then it's like this word va, which in a lot of translations is just like thrown out there as or. But Master Carrera says this. The word Va or appears in this Sutra for a reason. The implication suggested by the simple word casts an interesting light on the process of choice. Va is also the root of Vayu, the Hindu god of wind. Vayu is regarded as the breath of the cosmos, as spirit, as the mantra Om. Listen next week and we'll talk about that. Vayu, as cosmic wind saturates, shatters and cleanses, the book of Psalms and the Quran equate winds with angels, God's messengers. Travelers know well that it is much easier to go with the wind at our back than facing it. This makes me so emotional. It's just so beautiful. What do you feel right now, Sarah Page? What's emotionally? First and all, it's just so powerful. It's just so beautiful and it's so all-encompassing. it's just like I'm just sort of, know, every time I go through this is my favorite. I love all my children, but this is my favorite, you know, my favorite verse. I just love the idea of surrender. And I think it's because it is so, ⁓ you know, tapas. It's like friction. It's hard to surrender. We see it as something, you know, as a failure. ⁓ Yeah, surrender in English and like there and again in our cultural entrainment is like waving the white flag. It's like as if somehow you're defeated in surrender as opposed to seeing it as something really powerful, really beautiful and really ⁓ freeing. mean, it's one of those things is like how often do I just hold on to things? Story, some scars, whatever it is, because I don't really want to let go of my rightness. I don't really want to let go of how I think things are supposed to be. I don't want to let go of my victimization. All of those things. And so when you're talking about this and being raised in a Christian home and seeing quote unquote God in a very, it gives us so much choice. How do we choose to see God? And that to me is just, I'm going to cry. It it frees me. It just goes, oh, Sarah Page. You're not wrong. You're not wrong because it's just how you see it. You know, even if we look at a picture, we never see a picture the same way like Sessie's a picture or Sally sees a picture. We always see it differently. We notice things differently about it. And just to be okay with that and to celebrate that difference and that the beauty in the difference is just moving to me. And it is something that, and I'm really very moved. just thank you, you know. Can I? There is, I really want to just put one thing out there. Is it time for that? Okay. I jumped ship. I'm going a little rebel here. ⁓ I'm going to 26 because Master Iyengar, in the light of Patanjali's words and sutras of Patanjali by Iyengar, he says, God is the first, foremost, and absolute guru, unconditioned by time. And to me, let's just put all the loaded words in there. First of all, there's God, Absolute, Guru. You know, all of those kinds of things that we are taught, ⁓ no, nothing is fixed, nothing is this, and nothing, except for Ishvara. He is the absolute, he, she, they are the absolute Guru. And I love that because, you know, guru is such a trigger word, right? It's such an activated word for so many of us because we have been let down by people who call themselves gurus or who we have called a guru. You know what I'm That's a really powerful reframing. Yeah. And, and, you know, I don't know, but if we see them as a guru, we put all of this expectation upon them. And the fact of the matter is they're human, but what Iyengar reminded me of, no, no, no, no. The God, Ishvara, is the first, the foremost, the absolute guru, unconditioned by time. He is not aged. He is not human. He does not die. so, yes. Unconditioned by karma and action and material world, right? Yeah, it's so much. I a cigarette. need a cigarette. I'm like, oh my God. It's just like, I'm done here. Really beautiful. Yeah, Sally, what about you? know, like, you know, what is this? What is what? What resonates for you here? Well, I think I brought this up last time we talked about this, but I love on Ruben Vazquez unravel the thread. He starts this group of sutras with an alternate approach. Humility. it's just right above the sutra and what really hit me is this or this time like I have when I am feeling like I'm in charge of everything and I don't have capacity I find myself va va va like you know it's just like the word or as a choice I can continue to sludge through carrying the world on my shoulders or I can put some of that down and so His translation of 1.23 or by wholeheartedly relinquishing the illusion of control. I don't remember his name. was Antigone. So I don't know if I said hit. So this is the translation from Ruben Vazquez of 1.23 or by wholeheartedly relinquishing the illusion of control. But there was a little commentary in there that really stuck out this time and it says, this Sutra invites you to recognize that you did not create yourself or the universe. And despite whatever you may believe, you are not in control of the world. This Sutra provides the perspective of distance from your own stories. Seeing yourself from a larger perspective can be instrumental in letting go of the tension generated when you try to carry the whole world on your shoulders. And I just was like, ⁓ no, I'm getting emotional. And it's that or, or, or, know, Sally, said something and I'm just going to, ⁓ are you, are you complete? don't want to run through you. Yeah. Good. Okay. Cause, I what you're saying. And then the first translation I wanted to go to, and I skipped over until you said what you said, the Jiva Mukti Yoga Champ book says, Sharon Gannon says, by giving your life and identity to God, you attain the identity of God. And what you were saying was our identity, or what I heard was the identity We give ourselves our identity. We give ourselves the identity of being the person who saves the family, the person who is put upon, the person who does whatever. We do that to ourselves through samskara, through karma, whatever. We do that to ourselves. So what she says in the way she translates it, I love it, by giving your life and that identity to God, Ishvara, you attain the identity of Ishvara. And I, you know, let's just do that. Like I dream of Jeannie. It's all done. know, I know. I mean, it's like, what is our identity? Right. Well, it also calls to mind that like, one of the most famous quotes of attributed to Lord Hanuman in the Romania is, um, he's Lord Hanuman, the monkey God who is the most devoted servant of Lord Ram says, when I forget who I am, I serve you. When I know who I am, I... Right? When I forget who I am, I serve you. When I know who I am, I am you. And that's what I think this time around on studying this sutra, I got to that. Cause I feel like, Jagannath, Reverend Jagannath Karela also had a line that said, to Ishvara harnesses the power of a loving devoted heart to one's devoted heart. Not mean, not judgmental, but loving, devoted. No, I think that's for me just jumped out of the pages. love every time we go through these, I underline like crazy. And then I need to get like maybe different colors or something because I'm know, I know. Yeah, that's a good idea. I'm curious to me like how different things jump off the page based on our conversations and where we are in life in this moment. ⁓ Like everything has changed since we went through this the last time. There is nothing the same. I didn't get moved by this before. I related it to being in recovery because I surrender. And I haven't thought about that once in this conversation or when I was just sort of looking through it. It just does have a beautiful touchstone to that. We should speak to it. Totally like one of my favorite, one of my favorites. So, you know, I'm not, I'm not personally in recovery. I've known people in recovery ⁓ and I am in recovery. And, you know, it's a beautiful journey and it's a path toward peace and freedom for a lot of people. I love Sarah Page, remind us which of the 12 steps is surrender to a power. Pretty sure it's the third. I'm just going to make sure. So one of the 12 is surrender to a higher power, right? And I like this sort of euphemism, I don't know, this parable you could say, or this frame from recovery lineages, which is that, you know, got to find a higher power. Again, because of the Western cultural entrainment, a lot of times that's like Jesus or similar. Maybe it's Adonai, which is the Hebrew, but like even that isn't the name of God that like in Jewish tradition, you never say the name of God. Like it's like beyond human comprehension to actually say the name of God. But then in the 12 step tradition, it's that if you don't believe in God, if you can't find a higher power, you start with a door knob. And the teaching is that you are an addict and you're stuck in a room of your addiction. There you are. And whatever has gotten you to where you are is not gonna get you to where you need to go. So you're trying to get out of the room. The only way out of the room is through the door. The only way to open the door is to turn the doorknob. And that doorknob has a power over you, as it's the only way out. And so if you can't find a higher power, start with a doorknob. There's actually a wonderful reference and I was looking at it and I wanted to make sure it is actually step three. And the thing that it says is turn control over to that higher power, but there's a really wonderful way. Give up. love the way that I think there's a lot fast guys give up the illusion of control. Here's another one. What I found also that I really love is like just words. on the 12 steps. So the first is honesty, and then the second is faith, and the third is surrender, which is give up control. I mean, there it is. Yeah. mean, I think, you so what we thought about inquiry for this, it's, ⁓ know, there's like, we've talked about this, but I'm going to frame it actually a little differently than we might have thought because of where this conversation is, which is, what is an illusion? of like for you, each of you, ⁓ that is a manifest state, like that illusion of control. Like where do you invest in the illusion of control? I like the word invest. I have a thought I'm gonna use, and I'm gonna throw back to last week on Vairagya, where we talked about Vairagya, which is like the, you know, there's practice and detachment, and Vairagya is detachment. It's defined as ⁓ like the transcendence over the, here we go. Self mastery is the consciousness of self mastery in one who is free from craving from objects seen or heard about is non-attachment. The consciousness of self mastery, self mastery in one who is free from craving from objects seen or heard is not attachment. So it's idea. that one who is free from the craving of sense gratification can begin to cultivate this idea of detachment. And so the stitch here is that like this idea of the illusion, like I seek the illusion of control in sense gratification. ⁓ well, I was just thinking when you were asking this, I was like, where do I seek everywhere? where my life is not going the way I think it should and what the F and I'm working on it. And I'm so grateful that this is a practice, not a perfect. The minute things do not go where I think they should, that's where. The minute you say the word should, you know you're in should, you're in trouble. You shouldn't on yourself. No, I mean, for me, I guess where I'm invested in control is I'm just trying to think. and the illusion. The invested in the illusion. So one illusion of control I have is how many people show up to classes I teach. OK. We had this conversation ahead of time. I know. So I know I'm touching on intentionally poking a... That's OK. No, it's a sensitive spot for us all, right? Because like it's so hard to unwind. There's a saying in studio community sometimes that people vote with their feet, but that you can't, as a teacher, you can't try to teach so people will come to class to be liked. Because that is actually pretty inauthentic and it gets weird. And when teachers feel like they're trying to be liked, you actually feel like, I feel that. I have a spidey sense around that. And like, my class isn't for everybody and not everybody's gonna like what I teach and how I teach and like, I have to be okay with that. And sometimes that means that like there's a full room and sometimes it means that there's like a quarter of the room. But there's like a sense gratification of like the validation of like my class is full. There was a meme online. There was a meme online that I really, I had just a knee jerk reaction to kind of where, and I don't get a lot of those. To be honest with you, usually I'm pretty chill. was how, and it was some song was on, and it's like how a teacher walks into the room when they have a wait list. And it was like they had the sunglasses on and the red carpet was poured out and walking in like this. And I'm like, well, why wouldn't she walk into that with six people? Why wouldn't we give those six people that took time out of their day to get there? and give them the same badass kind of strut. They paid their $5 for the show, And they're hoping for the best. And though, do tend to go, I'll say to my manager, who's one of my best friends, I'll say, do you need to, she says, your numbers are fine. But for me, it's like, I don't whatever, fill up, and I'm just gonna be really transparent about that. It makes me very nervous if I don't get the same numbers, if I don't get the same whatever. And the fact of the matter is it's all going to change. I mean, that's the thing is I completely get caught up in that and I get it caught up in like the job I'm doing for the studio. And what did I say that people, and then sometimes people give you a little gift that reminds me that I'm not in control of everybody's life. Like, oh gosh, I lost this month, this quarter at that time, or I'm taking an arc. Like it's not all about me. I will say this one thing without giving. any background, thank you to the two of you who know the whole story, but no background. I was in my head so deeply a bit ago around something. And I was like, these people hate me. I went to my class and it was fine. It was filled. But I wasted all of that energy on a story that I told myself that just was not true. I was deeply invested in it. Right. And it's like, and I think it's an interesting point to poke at because like, I'm going to just suspect a lot of people listening might also be teachers because like, it's good. get a little wonky here into the yoga of it all. And like, I mean, everyone is welcome. Please stick around. And we, I'm going to guess there's a teacher or two out there and, and it's this really tough, like tension because it's like, First of all, in some studios, how much you get paid depends on how many people show up. Right? And on one hand, it's like, I shouldn't care. But if you teach full-time, it's your livelihood. I don't teach full-time, and where I am teaching right now, it's a flat fee. Five, or they book full at 33. The room could take 45 easy. But because of the context, they book it full at 33. And I look. because it's a corporate gym and like, they look, for sure, they look. And same, it's like one week, it's like around changes seasons or if there's a holiday, like sometimes those numbers fluctuate a little bit. And then I think, like actually ⁓ the group fitness manager at the location of the gym last night actually popped upstairs, she said, stayed because I knew you would be starting class. And I just wanted to tell you, She said very recently, like last couple of days, a member, like who she knows specifically stopped her to like say how much she loves your class. Now, I'm not sharing that to like, you know, so like, oh, like, but I'm sharing it just to say that like, shouldn't that matter just as much? If like, if there was one person who had a great experience and showed up and you basically gave him a free private versus like, mat to mat, full studio, like. We have it as those are different, as if one is somehow better than the other. The world has it. of control. Maya. Maya. And it is that, like, that, like, that we've all seen the teachers who walk into a full class, on, like they, like they somebody, a little diva energy. Sometimes it's playful, sometimes it's like not. And I've done it, if I'm really rigorously, ruthlessly honest. Have I strided into a full studio, you know, ready to throw my hair back and give it to him? Yes. ⁓ If you all don't know, Seth, he's bald. So he's not throwing his hair back, but he's throwing his illusionary hair back. But yes, he is. But you know, I'm really thinking about ⁓ like where I'm feeling resistance and what I'm willing to surrender to. And it's funny because as we're talking, like I really, for me, faith. I'm working on having faith. I'm working on having faith that though the universe kind of has my back in some way, I'm learning to surrender as an act of faith, to believe in myself. I can't remember which book, something of a salesman. And there was something in there about, we are all miracles. The odds, I don't know if Sam can cut it off, this is not okay, but the odds of your sperm and your egg hitting each other and creating me, it's one in a bazillion. And I actually give this little meditation in class sometimes, like when I want to invite people to like turn in and feel their heartbeat, I literally say like, just take a moment and contemplate the miracle of divine engineering inside of your body. Like you have a heart and has these complex muscles that fire in a specific sequence through a orders and chambers and valves and all this stuff to move the elixir of life in your body through your entire system. and you don't even know how it works or think about it. And I would also like even step further that your uniqueness, my uniqueness, like we're all created as we are for a reason. And that to me, that's coming right back to this issue. Like, and I want to share something I shared with these guys the other day and they don't know it's going to take me just a minute to read it. But to me, this was the greatest gift and you guys can find it online, but I'm going to My daughter-in-law shared this with me and it was a reel by John Schneider, which talks about life after delivery. And I'm going to not get this exactly right, but I just shot it down basically what I remember. And for me, this really hit home. In a mother's womb were two babies. One asked the other, do you believe in life after delivery? The other replied, yes, there has to be something after this. Maybe we're here to prepare ourselves for what will come. And maybe there will be things we can't even imagine. Baby one responds, you're crazy. There is no life after delivery. What kind of world or life would that be? Baby two says, I don't know exactly, but I think it will be brighter than in here. Maybe we'll walk with our legs or maybe we'll eat with our mouse or maybe we'll open our eyes and see things we never dreamed of. Baby one laughs. That's ridiculous. Walk, eat. Open our eyes. The umbilical cord gives us everything we need. Life after delivery is impossible. I don't think so, said the second boy, baby. I believe there's something more, something far beyond what we know here. I felt it. Don't you feel it in the stillness? We weren't made for this place alone. The first baby says, if it's so great out there, why has no one ever come back from delivery to let us know about it? The second baby then quietly says, I don't know exactly what comes next, but I believe that we'll meet mom. She will be there and she will take care of us. Mom, the first baby says, you actually believe in a mom. That's ridiculous. If she exists, then where is she now? Well, she's all around us, said the second baby. We're surrounded by her. It's in her that we live. Without her we wouldn't even exist. She feeds us, she holds us. And every now and then, if you're still and quiet, you can hear her voice. Good night, everybody. But it's so... such... Like when my daughter-in-law shared this with me, was like, this is what we're being asked. Right. Just to believe when you don't see. That's faith. It's faith, That's surrender. That's literally faith, that's exactly it. And I think I'll just, like, as we start to wrap up... Thank you, Sally. Thank you so much, Sally. I love that quote. It's so good. John Schneider. Well, I could spell his name. Being a mom, S-E-H-N-E-I-D-E-R. N-E-I-D-E-R. And I just kind of Googled John Schneider life after delivery. Life after delivery. It's beautiful. Beautiful. Well, and it's the sense... That sense of value, va, Ishvara pranidhanad va. That it's both or, like as in like, you could keep trying all this crazy shit and you can keep like doing all this stuff and you can keep investing in the illusion of your own control. The illusion of your own control. path to suffering. A certain path to suffering. Or you could like, that's, and that's walking into the wind. I was just saying to these people for the podcast started that I like, I'm thinking of like, could, I could, I could use a little more cardio and so I probably should start like, you know, picking up. used to run a little bit and like never super seriously, but like it's good, you know, it's good cardio, but I would go run. live in New York city and I, again, among my many blessings, I live in the, in the West village. And so it's like not, it's pretty close to run and get right to the Hudson river. And there's the beautiful park now. all up and down the west side of Manhattan. So from my apartment over to the water and then down to like, it doesn't matter where, like over the water, it's a beautiful run. It's a beautiful run. And then every once in a while, sometimes if I'm on my bike too, it's really rough when the run back, when you do that turnaround and you realize you're running home into the wind. And I think that like the illusion of control is running into the wind. Right? Biking into the wind. Like you're you're you can feel it like pressing back at you, but we just. It just like press in. We just like keep and sometimes we we gotta keep going right? But when you run with the wind at your back. You feel this extra. Like pep in your step. And when we listen for like where the wind is blowing. There's a depth of that surrender and a sweetness, right? An ease in the surrender. It's not like, it's where we start to, and this is again, what's so beautiful about the fact that Ishvara is of our own choosing, right? That to which we surrender is whatever manifestation is what is attractive to each one of us. And it doesn't have to be the same. It doesn't ever, and it doesn't, And I think this is something that's really powerful too. Like it doesn't have to be the same every minute of your life forever. It's not cast in stone. Like when we were on this trip in India, I was really thinking a lot about Durga, the manifestation of the fierce divine feminine and mother. And that just was really for other personal reasons that we don't need to like sort of dive into now, but that like... I really felt into it. I was really feeling a lot of strong feminine energy. We were by the Ganga, the Ganges River, which is a dev- a sacred feminine energy. And there are times when like I conscientiously like want to call in like the, the sheer transformational power of Shiva. Right? And Vayu as the wind is the wind, the di- the divine manifestation of wind, the breath of God. It's like when we, when we just quiet ourselves down a little bit. It's like how actually gave this reference in class tonight. Like when you're, when you, when you just cultivate a little stillness, your attention begins to perceive subtleties that when you're in the doing, you just can't hear or see. So like in that case, I noticed, like I noticed that there's a fan, I turned off the ceiling fans, but like there's still fan blowing air into the room. Cause it's a big corporate HVAC system. You don't hear that little bit of white noise or pay attention to it or even notice it. until you get still. And then all of sudden you can like hear what's there. And I think that what that sense like, you Piyasa varagyabhi ham taniro dha, right? Again, we'll start weaving this together a little bit. It's like when we cultivate practice and cultivate practice and cultivate practice with sincere devotion over a long period of time, and we start to transcend the immediate sense gratification that is like the fuel of the illusion of control. is when we can hear and feel like if you get like that, like in that little story you told Sally, it's like, if you get real quiet, you can sometimes hear mom, right? It's like in your life, when you get real quiet, sometimes you can feel that flow state presence towards something bigger than yourself. Absolutely. Well, and the other thing I was thinking about these two little babies in the womb was the baby that had faith, was nothing bad. Like it's not bad to have faith. It's like it up leveled the womb life. Yes. Regardless of what it may be. It's the wind at the back and it's like, you know, wouldn't it be so small if there was no mystery and no miracles? Well, and here's the thing is that the people who have faith, And I'll count us three as three that do, no matter how small, no matter how big. Yeah. think trying is a pretty good step, Sally. That's just one opinion. I'm just a big old walking, you know, I've always said I'm a big old walking breast. I'm like, hello, I love everybody and everybody and me and I believe in you and you know, all of that. that's something that needs to be tempered. But the thing is, is that I think we live in a world that is very cynical. And so when there are people who have faith, they love to belittle. And it's like the other baby in the womb, right? It's like he doesn't have faith. So he thinks that the one that he does is stupid, you know? Right. It's like when somebody tells you, like every once in while you meet somebody when you tell them that you believe in God or that you believe in faith, you believe in something bigger than yourself, they try to tell you how ignorant or how... Or even what we're doing right here and right now, that we believe in just an enlightened path. And not that we are enlightened, but we are on a path to enlightenment. The last time somebody pressed me on that, I sort of said to them, why does my faith seem to bother you so much? And like, well, it doesn't bother me. I just want you to like see the truth, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, I'm pretty good with my relationship with the truth. Are you? good. I'm clear. Thank you. Why do you need to convince? Why does my belief matter? Anyway, it was like a really, they were like really uncomfortable. We will talk about this topic for our entire life. We will stay in the study of this for our whole life. hope, hope, mean, I like, and ⁓ God, aren't we lucky that we found our way to this and we get the privilege. It is a privilege to have the space, time and safety to be in this study. I like it's that's also worth saying. I just, ⁓ is food every week. It is food. I hope that we. I hope to never know the answer to some of these questions. I really do. I hope I can continue to stay so curious that I don't like fall into the trap of the illusion of control of like a right answer. Okay, let's do fast. ⁓ What's a teaching tip for fellow teachers listening to us out there? ⁓ Let's get, we'll keep these tight. Sarah Page. Surrender into the chaos of your class. ⁓ Surrender to the chaos of your class? You know, when you sit there and sometimes you know you're being pranked that there's just an energy in the room. And maybe I taught a class recently where it was hurting horses. The energy was everywhere. And I just surrender into it. It's their practice, not mine. Surrender into the chaos of your class. Okay. Okay. I'll take it. what's a teaching tip? upper arm bones back in the physical practice, really as a gesture of keeping your heart open. Because no matter where you are, arm back will press your heart open forward. Yeah, my teaching tip is just like, surrender to how you show up and like, let that be okay. I think something so like a kind of a real privilege about being taking the seat of teacher is that you is to say to somebody who walks into the room, like you've done literally the hardest part. which is like walking in and choosing it and you've made the choice and you've committed to being here. So now you can actually just really surrender to how it is, how you are. And what if there was nothing wrong with it? What if you showed up exactly how, when, where you needed to? And what if you like really fully surrendered to whatever it is that brought you here? Can I add a little something? Cause I'm just like, I feel like putting your upper arms back. I'm going to encourage you to play like I've been playing with Va. Just Va. Va, ask your or, or if you find yourself already on yourself or, or, or. Yeah, yeah, I love the or. Sometimes I call that maybe, but like, like, as in like, maybe, like, maybe this is what works. Find, you know, try it. You tell me, va, or, or try something else. Right. Okay, cool. An inquiry, Sarah Page. I'm going to steal from you. Oh. And right before us, but I like it. In a moment of discomfort, where do you find the surrender? I changed the last I'll take that. That was my therapist. Well, I've written it down. Let me repeat it. In a moment of discomfort or tapas friction, where do you find a moment of surrender? Yeah. Yeah. Delish. All right. Now the inquiry from Sally. Where in your life do you feel the need to be in control of a situation? Do you believe in a Supreme being and what could you give up to a power greater than yourself? What could you give? What could you give up to a power greater than yourself? Yeah. I think my inquiry is like, What arises when you consider what is unconditioned by action of the material world? Where is the seed of your knowledge and what is beyond time? What's there, what's left? And just, where do you feel part of something truly, like where do you really feel like you're part of something bigger than yourself? And let that manifest. in the curiosity like this week, just do you feel that way in a yoga studio or in a yoga class? Like I'm part of this, this community is bigger than me. And so I'm part of it and I can be with it and surrender to it. Or ⁓ I don't know, do I feel connected? Like, you know, I like this turn of phrase, like we are not apart from nature. We are a part of nature. We as humans have this sense of like, as if somehow nature is around us, but not in or that we are not of it. And like, it's a really powerful flip to think about like, you, me, we are not apart from nature. We are all a part of nature. There is like a city, like a rural forest. it's still all just like nature. It's all the same stuff. Okay. I mean, it's so good and it's so ⁓ rich. And again, like every time we talk, have this conversation, it just unlocks something new, something new I can't wait to keep sitting with and discovering. ⁓ I'm so in love with you two and with this study. ⁓ So I'll just say thank you, Sarah Page. Thank you, Seth. Thank you, Sally Moore. Thank you, Seth. Thank you, Sarah Page. Thank you, Sally. And thank you to our listeners. If you have derived any benefit from this time we've spent together, please consider giving us a rating in the podcast platform of your choice, leave a review. And if you found it valuable and you think somebody else might too, consider sharing an episode. ⁓ We'd be so privileged. And please subscribe so that you get an hour of content in your feed that is not about the other crazy insane state of the world, which we just are choosing intentionally not to talk about here. And maybe more than an hour. Because we, right, actually. But it's true, like we want to carve out some space to elevate a little bit, like to get out of the swirl of the day to day and think about just like something a little bigger. Thanks for spending some time with us. for the, for the Sutra Squad, thank you so much and we'll see you next week. Bye bye. Bye bye. Bye.