Latest / The Breakfast Club / DONKEY: Burglary Bowels: Man Breaks Into Building & Barricades Himself Inside Bathroom Due To ‘Crisis Of Bowels’
Transcript
- 0:01Speaker 1: Don't be out here acting like a donkey. He bitch,
- 0:05Speaker 1: it's time for Donkey of the day. I'm a big boy.
- 0:08Speaker 1: I could take it if you feel I deserve it.
- 0:09Speaker 1: Ain't no big deal.
- 0:10Speaker 2: I know, Charlottegnea God gonna haven say his mouth.
- 0:13Speaker 3: You've got to say something you may not agree with.
- 0:14Speaker 3: It doesn't mean I'm mean, who's getting that donk?
- 0:16Speaker 1: Donkey that don't don't don't don't.
- 0:19Speaker 4: Donk the other day right here.
- 0:22Speaker 1: The breakfast club. Bitches, you can.
- 0:23Speaker 4: Call me the donkey of the day, But like I mean,
- 0:26Speaker 4: no harm.
- 0:27Speaker 3: He has donkey today for Wednesday, April fifteenth, go to
- 0:29Speaker 3: an unidentified man from Bremerton, Washington. Never heard of Birmerton, Washington,
- 0:33Speaker 3: but dropping the clues bombs for Brimington, Washington. Okay, now,
- 0:35Speaker 3: it's probably for the best that they haven't released this
- 0:38Speaker 3: man's identity because this man was caught in a very
- 0:40Speaker 3: embarrassing situation. And I would like to actually think all
- 0:43Speaker 3: parties involved, including the Bremerton Police Department dropping the clues
- 0:47Speaker 3: bombs for the Brimington Police Department, for how they handled
- 0:50Speaker 3: the situation. They handled this situation very well. Now, before
- 0:53Speaker 3: I tell you why this man is getting donkey of
- 0:54Speaker 3: the day. I would like to discuss with you your
- 0:57Speaker 3: bows okay, not just your bowels, because if you're healthy,
- 1:01Speaker 3: you should have a bad movement a couple of times
- 1:02Speaker 3: a day with I would like to discuss is when
- 1:04Speaker 3: you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter.
- 1:08Speaker 1: What am I talking about? Diarrhea?
- 1:10Speaker 3: When you're chilling with your daughter and you feel the
- 1:12Speaker 3: poopool water diarrhea, When you're walking.
- 1:15Speaker 1: Down the hall and you feel something.
- 1:16Speaker 2: Fall that would never heard that one.
- 1:23Speaker 1: When you're riding in a Chevy and you feel something.
- 1:25Speaker 3: Heavy diarrhea, that's right, butt mud okay, pool goo, the runs,
- 1:30Speaker 3: bubble guts, backdoor blues, cold brown okay, hurricane gut.
- 1:34Speaker 1: Trina diary is no joke, kids, Okay.
- 1:36Speaker 3: But you get to a certain age and you know
- 1:39Speaker 3: what you should and shouldn't be eating because you know
- 1:41Speaker 3: what can trigger a chocolate tsunami.
- 1:43Speaker 1: Okay.
- 1:43Speaker 3: And if you risk it all by eating something you
- 1:46Speaker 3: have no business eating, and you leave the house knowing
- 1:48Speaker 3: what could happen, that's on you.
- 1:50Speaker 1: Okay. Have you ever done colon could be prepped?
- 1:52Speaker 3: Vy? I know you have, yes, Okay, I have as well,
- 1:56Speaker 3: all right, what does your doctor tell you the day
- 1:58Speaker 3: before when you are on that liquid, don't leave the house,
- 2:02Speaker 3: stay near a toilet, cry because you want the toilet
- 2:05Speaker 3: for what feels like every three to five minutes. Why
- 2:07Speaker 3: am I bringing this up? Because if you leave the
- 2:10Speaker 3: house when the doctor tells you not to, when you
- 2:11Speaker 3: get to her, she squirts, that's on you.
- 2:14Speaker 1: And that is what bringing me to today's donkey.
- 2:16Speaker 3: Today See Brimerton police had to respond to a burglary
- 2:19Speaker 3: call okay. Officers were called to a report of a
- 2:22Speaker 3: burglary in progress okay and a building in downtown Brimerton
- 2:28Speaker 3: where a man had forced his way into a building
- 2:31Speaker 3: and barricaded himself inside a bathroom. Now I'm reading this
- 2:34Speaker 3: directly from the police report Okay. To Brimton PD said,
- 2:38Speaker 3: from behind the.
- 2:39Speaker 1: Closed door, they heard yelling and screaming.
- 2:44Speaker 3: Okay, yes, what's that? Their exact words was he was
- 2:50Speaker 3: making a lot of noise, so much so that the
- 2:53Speaker 3: police thought this might turn into a tense, violent encounter.
- 2:57Speaker 3: They yelled commands for the man to leave the bathroom room,
- 3:00Speaker 3: and after being told several times to come out, he
- 3:03Speaker 3: finally came out. He probably came out after everything else
- 3:06Speaker 3: came out, and when he came out, the police wished
- 3:09Speaker 3: they had left him in there. All right, the police said,
- 3:12Speaker 3: this is the police's exact words. What happened next was
- 3:15Speaker 3: not your typical burglary scenario.
- 3:18Speaker 1: They said. The situation became.
- 3:20Speaker 3: Immediately clear that everyone present that this was less about
- 3:24Speaker 3: criminal intent and more about a full blown personal emergency.
- 3:30Speaker 3: That means it was bookie gravy everywhere, Okay, probably.
- 3:34Speaker 1: All on the flood of walls. He couldn't flush enough.
- 3:37Speaker 3: I'm sure it looked like somebody won a championship game
- 3:40Speaker 3: and instead of champagne, they decided to pop kalua.
- 3:43Speaker 1: Okay.
- 3:44Speaker 3: The man told police it was a crisis of bowls,
- 3:48Speaker 3: and the police agreed with him. They said, based on
- 3:51Speaker 3: the totality of the circumstances, that assessment was not in
- 3:55Speaker 3: dispute and the individual was taken to a hospital for treatment.
- 4:00Speaker 3: I know you might be thinking charlamagne whilere you victim blaming.
- 4:05Speaker 3: First of all, two things, One, if you got to
- 4:07Speaker 3: be taken to the hospital for treatment because your body
- 4:11Speaker 3: is rejecting your life choices, and if you have to
- 4:13Speaker 3: break into an office building because your ancestors told you
- 4:16Speaker 3: not to eat to eat that, and you did it anyway,
- 4:19Speaker 3: then you had no business leaving the house to begin with.
- 4:22Speaker 1: Okay, even if it wasn't the house. If you was
- 4:24Speaker 1: at work, okay, wherever.
- 4:26Speaker 3: You was at, you did whatever you did that caused
- 4:31Speaker 3: your stomach to file aggrievance. Okay, you did that all right.
- 4:35Speaker 3: So wherever you was at, you were supposed to stay there.
- 4:37Speaker 3: You can't be out in the wild when there's potential
- 4:40Speaker 3: for a brown flame.
- 4:41Speaker 1: Okay.
- 4:41Speaker 3: When your stomach and ass come together to gora like
- 4:44Speaker 3: a dungeon dragon, you will absolutely be changing your drawers.
- 4:48Speaker 3: And you knew better. You knew better, you knew not
- 4:51Speaker 3: to leave that house or wherever you was at. That's
- 4:53Speaker 3: why they tell you to trust your gut. Please give
- 4:58Speaker 3: this brother the switch out of the hamilitones.
- 5:01Speaker 4: Oh no, you are the dog of the day, the dog.
- 5:12Speaker 1: All the day.
- 5:14Speaker 3: Yee.
- 5:18Speaker 1: You know your stomach, you know your body, trust your gut.
- 5:22Speaker 4: Sometimes it's unexpected, y'all, know that happens.
- 5:25Speaker 3: Sometimes happened to me once in my life, I went
- 5:27Speaker 3: to a Jamaican restaurant in Columbus, South Carolina, used to
- 5:29Speaker 3: be called Uh don't know if it's still there. We
- 5:31Speaker 3: used to be called cool runnings, cool running and whatever
- 5:35Speaker 3: I ate the night before, it came out the next day.
- 5:38Speaker 3: Next day, though, you know what I mean? So that
- 5:40Speaker 3: was unexpected.
- 5:41Speaker 2: Okay, that happened to me a pair a couple of
- 5:43Speaker 2: years ago.
- 5:44Speaker 3: I remember when you do your drawers in the underwear
- 5:47Speaker 3: and the jam of the fineament had no idea what
- 5:49Speaker 3: the hell we'd be doing at the breakfast club. That
- 5:51Speaker 3: was actually the custod here's complained. I don't know what
- 5:53Speaker 3: they be doing in there, but I found some red underwear.
- 5:57Speaker 3: It's not with brown.
- 5:58Speaker 2: Stains in them, that's not No, it was gassing. It wasn't.
- 6:01Speaker 4: So was that sound you that that might have been?
- 6:05Speaker 2: And that happened. You've been working a pare for three
- 6:07Speaker 2: years now, and it happened to be a couple of
- 6:09Speaker 2: times a pair.
- 6:09Speaker 3: I ain't nobody, no couple. Now see something wrong? Now
- 6:11Speaker 3: see that's loose booty and loose booty.
- 6:13Speaker 1: You don't remember how running out?
- 6:15Speaker 4: You're not talking about me.
- 6:16Speaker 1: I thought you was.
- 6:18Speaker 4: Talking about No, that's because I don't have no glall bladder.
- 6:23Speaker 1: What you lying again?
- 6:25Speaker 3: Now?
- 6:26Speaker 1: Your your mom about to call you and say you up?
- 6:29Speaker 4: Remember that and begon January.
- 6:31Speaker 2: So you ain't got no glad bladder.
- 6:32Speaker 4: Now you got diar real No, no, I don't have
- 6:33Speaker 4: a gall bladder, so things like I can't hold this
- 6:36Speaker 4: sometimes and it's like, oh my god. So yeah, when
- 6:38Speaker 4: y'all are recording me and laughing and things like that,
- 6:40Speaker 4: it's my health.
- 6:41Speaker 2: I mean, nextual condition.
- 6:43Speaker 4: Exactly, I don't have you only get one gallbladder. I
- 6:46Speaker 4: thought you had too, but you have one. And when
- 6:48Speaker 4: they removed it, I was like, wow, Like I thought.
- 6:51Speaker 3: Most people live normally without a gold bladder, though Mini
- 6:53Speaker 3: experienced temporary digestive changes such as diarrhea.
- 6:56Speaker 1: Exactly, wow, are bloating.
- 6:59Speaker 2: Its cause frequent loose booty or watery stools?
- 7:01Speaker 4: And you never it does not say that, and you
- 7:03Speaker 4: never and you never.
- 7:04Speaker 1: Know when you get it said.
- 7:08Speaker 3: When you're sliding in the first and your parents be
- 7:10Speaker 3: getting to burst, yes, when you're sliding into two and
- 7:13Speaker 3: your parents will fill with blue. When you're sliding in
- 7:16Speaker 3: the third and you feel a greasy turn, please, when
- 7:19Speaker 3: you're sliding in the home and your parents will fill
- 7:21Speaker 3: with brown.
- 7:24Speaker 2: People just can't help it. Right, Let's get serious. Let's
- 7:28Speaker 2: get serious. Thinking of that dog in the day now
- 7:30Speaker 2: when we come back, United States Representative from Minnesota's fifth
- 7:33Speaker 2: Congressional District will be joining us ilhan opan Omar when
- 7:36Speaker 2: we come back. It's the Breakfast Club. Good Morning. The
- 7:39Speaker 2: Breakfast Club.
- 7:42Speaker 3: Donkey of Today is sponsored by renowned personal injury attorney
- 7:45Speaker 3: Michael the Bull, Lamb and Soft. Don't be a donkey
- 7:48Speaker 3: when you need a fighter on your side. If you
- 7:50Speaker 3: ever injured, go to Michael to Bull dot com. That's
- 7:52Speaker 3: Michael to Bull dot com. And when you mess with
- 7:53Speaker 3: the bull, you get the horns.