Latest / Postcards to the Universe / Jenn Wodtke

Transcript

Jenn Wodtke · Postcards to the Universe

• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Welcome to Postcards to the Universe with Melissa Capria. Do
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: you believe in magic? What if you were told that
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: all you had to do was get a little creative
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: and work a magic spell to bring anything you can
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: imagine into your life. Here on Postcards to the Universe,
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: we will share manifesting tips, postcards, creativity, abundance, and prosperity.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: Here is your host, Melissa Capria.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to Postcards to the Universe with Melissa
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: creating the life you crave. How's everybody doing.
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: I hope that you guys.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: Are doing well this Wednesday. It's my favorite favorite day
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: of the week. I love having this show and I
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: love talking to you guys, and I'm excited about to
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: the show. I have a very interesting guest. Her name
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: is Jen Wyke, and she is a pleasure and Orgasm
• 1:11
  Speaker 2: coach and she's going to join me in just a
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: few minutes. We've been having a little bit of connection problems. Jen,
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: are you there? Can you hear me?
• 1:20
  Speaker 4: I can hear you?
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Am I okay? Do I sound okay? Or do
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: you need to call back? Because I do a little
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: a little in the beginning talking about somethings I'm doing
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: before you we have our wonderful conversation, but you can
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: hear me good. I just want to make sure.
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: You're super fuzzy. I can't. I can only make out
• 1:39
  Speaker 4: like every third word.
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: Okay, why don't you hang up and call back in?
• 1:42
  Speaker 4: Okay? To call back in?
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's it's me. Oh do maybe you day call
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: back in Okay?
• 1:56
  Speaker 5: You know?
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: I don't know, because if it's me, I don't know.
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: I try to connect three different ways. So if I
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: hope people can hear me, if anybody who listens to
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: me on a regular basis, let me know if I
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: sound fleasy to you, because then I can call back in.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: I am excited, Like I said, I have this show
• 2:16
  Speaker 2: a little bit about me. I'm an author. I have
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: a book that's titled Postcards to the Universe, Harness the
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: Universe's power and manifest dreams. Maybe that's a little bit better.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: How does that sound? Do I sound a little bit
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: better at all? Hello?
• 2:33
  Speaker 5: Tin?
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  Speaker 4: E bit better?
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah? A little bit better.
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: I'm trying like every single way that I can, I
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: can connect. All right, We're just gonna go right to it, Jen,
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: because it's just like so twisted today. I don't know
• 2:46
  Speaker 2: this is a problem when we do live like I
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: was originally connected good and then I and then something happened.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: So let me share a little bit about Jen for
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: those who are listening. Jen Blacky helps women find deep
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: fulfillment and self worth through connection with their desires, sexuality,
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: and pleasure. As a pleasure and orgasm coach, her clients
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: learn how to quiet their inner critic, get out of
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: their mind and into their body so they can expand
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: their pleasure and orgasmic capacity, leading to the greater personal
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: power and satisfaction. Jen is passionate about supporting women as
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: they reclaim power that has historically been denied them for
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: millennia on the global stage, in the church, in their sexuality,
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: in their communities, and in the workforce. Jen is the
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: founder of the Touchless Orgasm Method, a revolutionary approach that
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: focuses on how to connect with the pleasure that is
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: already inside us. Jen says, growing up in a conservative Canada,
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  Speaker 2: I had unconsciously numbed my sexuality. The process of waking
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: up began in my early twenties with my first touchless
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: organ in my sleep. It culminated in a full awakening
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: at a woman's retreat. I now teach women how to
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: experience expansive pleasure building all the way to touch less orgasm. Hi, Jen,
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: welcome so much. I hope that you can hear me?
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: Can you hear me?
• 4:18
  Speaker 4: I mostly I caught most of that, so I hope forgets.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, So what I'm going to do is I
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: want you to talk and tell everybody a little bit
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: about you, and I'm going to try to reconnect it
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: in another way because we got you got to hear me.
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: So just share, share yourself with everybody. Okay, I'll be
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: right back.
• 4:38
  Speaker 4: Okay, sounds good. Huh Yeah. As was mentioned by Melissa
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  Speaker 4: as she was introducing me, I first sort of stumbled
• 4:51
  Speaker 4: into or found myself having my very first touchless orgasm
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  Speaker 4: in my sleep, which I didn't realize at the time
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  Speaker 4: was so life changing. At the time, I had nowhere
• 5:03
  Speaker 4: to put that experience because I had only ever really
• 5:06
  Speaker 4: learned in my public school sexual education that men experienced
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  Speaker 4: had those types of experiences, so I had no concept
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  Speaker 4: that this was something that women could do as well.
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  Speaker 4: So I kind of just left it there. I didn't
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  Speaker 4: really do anything with it, and every now and then
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  Speaker 4: it popped back into my mind. It's like, wow, my
• 5:28
  Speaker 4: brain and my body did this while I was completely unconscious.
• 5:34
  Speaker 4: And as I got further into my formal sexuality studies,
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: I just became convinced that if I could do this
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  Speaker 4: during my sleep, I could learn to do it awake.
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  Speaker 4: And that has sort of kind of been a large
• 5:48
  Speaker 4: part of my journey into becoming a pleasure in sexuality.
• 5:51
  Speaker 4: Coach was like figuring out how to take that unconscious
• 5:54
  Speaker 4: experience that was amazing, like having an orgasm in my sleep,
• 5:59
  Speaker 4: like that was super fun, but I wanted to be
• 6:01
  Speaker 4: able to do it.
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  Speaker 3: Wait, it sounds super fun.
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  Speaker 6: You should be able to hear me better now. I
• 6:05
  Speaker 6: think we finally got it figured out.
• 6:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah you better?
• 6:07
  Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, Okay, that's why I thought, Yeah, I don't
• 6:09
  Speaker 6: know what there's a glitch. That's the one thing I
• 6:11
  Speaker 6: hate about doing a live show. There's nothing we can
• 6:13
  Speaker 6: do about it. But we're all good now. I don't
• 6:15
  Speaker 6: even know. Are you calling in from Japan?
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: I am in Japan right now.
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  Speaker 3: Yes, yeah. Yeah.
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  Speaker 6: That's the one good thing about the Internet, right we
• 6:24
  Speaker 6: can connect all around the world.
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  Speaker 3: So yeah, that's really interesting. I mean, I've.
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  Speaker 6: Had like, you know, dreams where I've actually had I guess,
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  Speaker 6: I mean I never thought about it as a Toucheles
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  Speaker 6: orgasm truthfully, you know, because in the dream I was
• 6:40
  Speaker 6: having a sexual experience, but I guess my physical body
• 6:45
  Speaker 6: wasn't being touched, right, So it's all in your brain.
• 6:49
  Speaker 6: Like I never even thought about it until I was
• 6:51
  Speaker 6: reading about you, you know, and then how you had
• 6:54
  Speaker 6: your first experience. So are you saying, like, we can
• 6:58
  Speaker 6: like do that with our dreaming, like we can?
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: We can?
• 7:03
  Speaker 6: Yeah, okay, all right, yeah, okay, that's what I want
• 7:06
  Speaker 6: to find out. I'm sure a lot of women we're
• 7:10
  Speaker 6: listening or probably like, hmm, that's pretty interesting. So you've
• 7:14
  Speaker 6: learned how to do to have an orgasm?
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  Speaker 3: Kind of is it at will? Like I don't even
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: know how to even say it.
• 7:20
  Speaker 4: I wouldn't call it at will? Okay, I mean, here,
• 7:24
  Speaker 4: here's what I think are the are the bones of
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  Speaker 4: it in Okay? In concept, it's it's a fairly simple
• 7:29
  Speaker 4: process in the sense that you use what I think
• 7:31
  Speaker 4: of as your activated mind, right, so you're like consciously
• 7:34
  Speaker 4: and deliberately focusing on your pleasure. So once you kind
• 7:40
  Speaker 4: of you know, set your intention to do that, then
• 7:42
  Speaker 4: you put that attention, that awareness onto your body, right
• 7:47
  Speaker 4: and focus in on what pleasure sensations are already alive,
• 7:51
  Speaker 4: what you can feel when that varies from person to
• 7:53
  Speaker 4: person sort of that I wouldn't say the innate ability,
• 7:57
  Speaker 4: but what we're able to access, and then when we
• 8:00
  Speaker 4: just work on expanding and building that pleasure. So the
• 8:02
  Speaker 4: concept is super super simple, right, anybody can learn to
• 8:06
  Speaker 4: do this. Where it does get complicated, and I'm sure
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  Speaker 4: a lot of your audience is going this sounds kind
• 8:11
  Speaker 4: of like nonsense, like I don't really believe this. What
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  Speaker 4: can be really difficult for a lot of people is
• 8:16
  Speaker 4: that almost all of us have all sorts of like
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: conditioning and messaging from our society, our families, church, school, media,
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  Speaker 4: all of that about how what is acceptable in our sexuality,
• 8:30
  Speaker 4: what is acceptable for pleasure, what is acceptable for orgasm? Right,
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  Speaker 4: so we have a lot of basically kind of like
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  Speaker 4: gunk in the way. So that's where a lot of
• 8:39
  Speaker 4: people might find it not as simple process. It's like
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: how do you dig out that gunk to get to
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  Speaker 4: the place where you can experience this touchless pleasure and orgasm.
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  Speaker 4: But what I would say, even if people might not
• 8:54
  Speaker 4: experience the full touchless orgasm, you can still make huge,
• 8:59
  Speaker 4: huge games and your touchless pleasure, right, Like, once you
• 9:02
  Speaker 4: start getting into the practice of doing this, it becomes
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  Speaker 4: it becomes a skill. Our pleasure really responds to practice,
• 9:09
  Speaker 4: and it is a skill that we can grow. So
• 9:10
  Speaker 4: if you start your own touch less orgasm practice, even
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  Speaker 4: if you don't get to orgasm, maybe that's not even
• 9:16
  Speaker 4: your goal, but you have this amazing ability that you
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  Speaker 4: can I would say that's at will parts. So I'm
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  Speaker 4: still you know, I'm sitting here in front of my
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  Speaker 4: computer life I can just focus right and be like
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  Speaker 4: ooh okay, like that's alive inside of my pussy today,
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  Speaker 4: Like what is she feeling? What is she wanting? Like
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  Speaker 4: you know. So that's and that I think is the
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  Speaker 4: beauty of it. To become more sort of in touch
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  Speaker 4: with your pleasure on a minute by minute daily basis,
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  Speaker 4: if you desire.
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  Speaker 6: Well, it's really interesting because I imagine that what you're you know,
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  Speaker 6: what you're what you're doing, and what you're helping women
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  Speaker 6: do is very empowering, right because there's still such a
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  Speaker 6: stigma around when men's sexuality, right, Like, you know, women
• 10:03
  Speaker 6: women having any power in their own sexuality. I mean,
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  Speaker 6: there's still comments being made about powerful women about how
• 10:10
  Speaker 6: they slept their way to the top, right Nobody says
• 10:13
  Speaker 6: that about men, you know, like and it's so it's
• 10:16
  Speaker 6: there's it's still very misogynistic and double standard and all
• 10:20
  Speaker 6: that stuff. And then I also a second part of
• 10:23
  Speaker 6: that is I imagine that this is very helpful for
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  Speaker 6: people who have sexual trauma because they can go through
• 10:30
  Speaker 6: a process without actually being touched.
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  Speaker 4: Mm hmmmm. You know I wanted to there's sort of
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: two things in there. The first thing I wanted to
• 10:38
  Speaker 4: just sort of recognize, you know, women who slip their
• 10:40
  Speaker 4: way to the top. Yeah, we talk about is men
• 10:42
  Speaker 4: who force women to play the exactly exact think. Yeah,
• 10:48
  Speaker 4: that's that's you know, That's why I talk a lot
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: about power and pleasure. I think they are so inextricably linked,
• 10:57
  Speaker 4: especially for women that we have been systemically you know,
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: disempower from all arenas for millennia through our sexuality. Right, Like,
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  Speaker 4: it wasn't that long ago a woman who might have
• 11:06
  Speaker 4: had a childhood of wedlock, you know, a shunned doomed
• 11:08
  Speaker 4: to a life of poverty because she couldn't you know,
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: get a job, and all of those kinds of things.
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  Speaker 4: So that's where I think the power piece comes in.
• 11:16
  Speaker 4: And the second part of that is there is a trauma,
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: like you mentioned, I think there's you. I think there's
• 11:26
  Speaker 4: a generational trauma. I think there's you know, millennia of women.
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  Speaker 4: Sorry of wounding that women carry through this, you know,
• 11:33
  Speaker 4: disempowerment through this lack of ability to live their sexual
• 11:40
  Speaker 4: lives as they desire. And then individually, whatever any woman
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: may have faced throughout her life, you know, some sort
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: of assault or having a partner did onto her boundaries
• 11:48
  Speaker 4: or whatever. I think it's all linked. And I absolutely
• 11:52
  Speaker 4: find this such an empowering practice that I can any woman,
• 11:56
  Speaker 4: if you know, she learns the method, can sort of
• 11:58
  Speaker 4: just go, Okay, I'm just going to exp eperience pleasure
• 12:01
  Speaker 4: by myself for myself. This isn't visible to anybody. I
• 12:04
  Speaker 4: can just sit and be with my body and be
• 12:07
  Speaker 4: with my pleasure and just enjoy that without any of
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: the outside sort of you know, gunk, right, And so
• 12:14
  Speaker 4: I also consider it a major paradigm shift that instead
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: of getting our pleasure from the outside in, which is
• 12:21
  Speaker 4: great and wonderful, like partners, toys and hands amazing. I
• 12:25
  Speaker 4: will never give those up. But when we make that
• 12:28
  Speaker 4: shift and we decide to experience pleasure from the inside
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: out first, it's just such a vastly, vastly different pleasure experience,
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: and I find it so nourishing, so kealing, and just
• 12:40
  Speaker 4: so amazing for our growth.
• 12:43
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 12:43
  Speaker 6: No, definitely, And I was thinking as you were talking
• 12:48
  Speaker 6: that it's so important because I think everybody does this women,
• 12:53
  Speaker 6: I believe women especially does. We disconnect from our bodies, right, So,
• 12:59
  Speaker 6: I mean we try to disconnect when we're in pain.
• 13:01
  Speaker 6: We don't ask the pain why it's here, what it's
• 13:04
  Speaker 6: showing us. We take stuff to make it, you know, disappear,
• 13:08
  Speaker 6: medicines or drugs or whatever. And it's probably on the
• 13:12
  Speaker 6: flip side of that, the same with our pleasure. We
• 13:16
  Speaker 6: disconnect from our bodies. You know, maybe we're we're somewhere
• 13:20
  Speaker 6: else and our to do list is so long, you know,
• 13:24
  Speaker 6: you can't even think about being with your own body
• 13:28
  Speaker 6: and experiencing pleasure.
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  Speaker 3: Do you find that a lot with your clients?
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think what happens a lot of us, like
• 13:36
  Speaker 4: you said, don't want to feel pain obviously, like humans
• 13:39
  Speaker 4: were made pain, So there is that disconnect That can
• 13:42
  Speaker 4: also come hand in hand with a numbing of you know,
• 13:45
  Speaker 4: not wanting to feel in the body. But what happens
• 13:48
  Speaker 4: we can't selectively selectively numb, right. If we're numbing our prain,
• 13:53
  Speaker 4: we are absolutely numbing our Sure. If we disconnect from
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: our body because we don't want to feel the pain,
• 13:59
  Speaker 4: we've also disconnect from our pleasure. So that's the other
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: thing that is really difficult about this work. I don't
• 14:04
  Speaker 4: want to because I don't want to be clickbait touchless organism.
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: This is hard work. Yeah, this is hard work because
• 14:10
  Speaker 4: you have to be able to look at your pain.
• 14:15
  Speaker 4: Your shame is a big one too, and all of
• 14:18
  Speaker 4: that stuff that we take on. If you want to
• 14:20
  Speaker 4: achieve you know this the endless, infinite pleasure that is
• 14:25
  Speaker 4: available to you. You have to look at your pain
• 14:27
  Speaker 4: and you have to feel it, and feeling it is
• 14:31
  Speaker 4: a way to releasing it. Right. So that's where people
• 14:35
  Speaker 4: often go like, I, I don't want to do this.
• 14:38
  Speaker 4: I don't want to get into it. It feels too much,
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: And that is that is where coaching comes in. I'm
• 14:45
  Speaker 4: a one on one coach as well as I teach
• 14:46
  Speaker 4: touchless organism in a book and inside of a program,
• 14:50
  Speaker 4: but the one on one coaching program is there for
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: someone to really help you work through whatever your own
• 14:56
  Speaker 4: individual blocks and pain and numbing is so that you
• 14:59
  Speaker 4: can and come out of it and start moving into
• 15:02
  Speaker 4: that pleasure and living in that pleasure day to day.
• 15:06
  Speaker 5: Hmm.
• 15:06
  Speaker 6: Yeah, so is it So it's even deeper than just
• 15:11
  Speaker 6: sexual healing.
• 15:12
  Speaker 4: I feel absolutely, Yeah, absolutely.
• 15:14
  Speaker 6: I feel like just hearing you talking about what you do,
• 15:17
  Speaker 6: like there's a real you're you're really connecting with your
• 15:22
  Speaker 6: your physical body and your emotional.
• 15:25
  Speaker 3: Body while you're processing that.
• 15:26
  Speaker 6: I mean, think about how many women, just women and
• 15:29
  Speaker 6: I know men do this too, But every time you know,
• 15:31
  Speaker 6: you look in the mirror, you do nothing.
• 15:33
  Speaker 3: But criticize yourself. You criticize and shame your body.
• 15:36
  Speaker 6: Right, So it's like you're training yourself to do something different.
• 15:40
  Speaker 3: This is loving your body.
• 15:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, and that that shift into loving I'm
• 15:46
  Speaker 4: so glad you brought that up. And I think loving
• 15:49
  Speaker 4: our body is huge. So many women who come to
• 15:50
  Speaker 4: me have absolutely issues with body image for sure, but
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: it's also bigger than that, right, Like it is having
• 15:59
  Speaker 4: it is learning how to love every part of you.
• 16:03
  Speaker 4: I mean, for me, one of the big I never
• 16:07
  Speaker 4: experienced a lot of shame and anxiety until the pandemic.
• 16:10
  Speaker 4: Then I was like, oh my god, is this what
• 16:12
  Speaker 4: people have been talking about? Like this is terrible? And
• 16:18
  Speaker 4: I what do you mean.
• 16:19
  Speaker 6: Though, like what happened during the pandemic, Like you were
• 16:22
  Speaker 6: like nothing specific.
• 16:24
  Speaker 4: I used to work in films, so I my job
• 16:27
  Speaker 4: unfortunately became untenable. Somebody in my life living living hell
• 16:30
  Speaker 4: at work. So I had to quit my job in
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: the pandemic, which was terrifying. You know. I called my
• 16:35
  Speaker 4: parents and I was like, oh my god, I gotta
• 16:37
  Speaker 4: quit this job, like because my brain's like if you'll
• 16:42
  Speaker 4: never make money again. So basically it called my parents,
• 16:45
  Speaker 4: was like if I never get another job, will you
• 16:46
  Speaker 4: help me? And they're like, yes, we'll help you. Yes.
• 16:49
  Speaker 4: So it's just that like uncontrollable shame that like.
• 16:54
  Speaker 6: You were experiencing it for the first Yeah, okay, I
• 16:58
  Speaker 6: got it.
• 16:59
  Speaker 4: I mean I experienced shame before, obviously, sure not to that,
• 17:03
  Speaker 4: like it was like a monster recod It's like fangs
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: and me and like wouldn't let go right sure? And
• 17:09
  Speaker 4: so yeah, that and that was when I first really
• 17:15
  Speaker 4: understood that you have to find a way to love
• 17:19
  Speaker 4: all these parts of yourselves. Like I've I've done shamegasms, right,
• 17:24
  Speaker 4: which is amazing, But I've part of that is like
• 17:27
  Speaker 4: looking at the shame and being like, Okay, this is
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: a part of me from somewhere inside of me. What
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: is it? Where does it come from? Like I have
• 17:34
  Speaker 4: to accept my shame, my rage, my jealousy, all of
• 17:38
  Speaker 4: those things on the way to loving not only my
• 17:41
  Speaker 4: body but all parts of myself. That I think is
• 17:45
  Speaker 4: one of the foundational steps to any type of you know,
• 17:49
  Speaker 4: massive epic pleasure.
• 17:52
  Speaker 3: That is a new one. Shamegasm.
• 17:55
  Speaker 4: Oh, it's so good. It's so good. It's actually up
• 17:58
  Speaker 4: on my YouTube, so nobody can go and find it.
• 18:00
  Speaker 4: It's up there right now, and you can use it
• 18:03
  Speaker 4: for any really strong, challenging emotion. But it's it really
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: starts the process of using pleasure as a portal to transformation.
• 18:13
  Speaker 4: So we basically flip from shame to pleasure, shame to pleasure,
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: back and forth, back and forth, so that it sort
• 18:19
  Speaker 4: of becomes intermingled, and it really creates this experience in
• 18:24
  Speaker 4: your body that like, I am still worthy of pleasure.
• 18:26
  Speaker 4: I can still experience pleasure and orgasm even with this
• 18:29
  Speaker 4: shame piece that isn't inside me. Yeah, so that's really healing.
• 18:34
  Speaker 6: Yeah, because you talk about what role shame plays in sexuality.
• 18:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, So why do you think.
• 18:43
  Speaker 6: Why do you think there is so much shame around
• 18:47
  Speaker 6: our sexuality? You know, what we like, what we don't like,
• 18:52
  Speaker 6: you know, even pleasuring ourselves, you know, other partners.
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: I mean, I imagine.
• 18:58
  Speaker 6: You know, when people saw today's show and they saw
• 19:02
  Speaker 6: touchless orgasm, of course they're like, you know, anytime anything sexual,
• 19:05
  Speaker 6: because people's interest gets peaks. But it's it's it's much
• 19:09
  Speaker 6: deeper work. You know, this isn't what, this isn'tportant on people.
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: You know, like we're talking deeper, right.
• 19:18
  Speaker 6: This is much deeper than that. So but it does
• 19:21
  Speaker 6: peau our interest. But then everybody's always ashamed, ashamed of
• 19:25
  Speaker 6: their sexual wants and desires.
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: So why do you think that is?
• 19:30
  Speaker 6: You think it's just generational to just passed down.
• 19:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think there's I think it's so multi faceted.
• 19:38
  Speaker 4: I think you know, here in the West, you know,
• 19:42
  Speaker 4: we fundamentally come from a puritanical society, like our yeses
• 19:46
  Speaker 4: are puritanical, and we really really value sacrifice in our culture,
• 19:52
  Speaker 4: Like even if you think about going out and eating,
• 19:54
  Speaker 4: you know, whatever your most delicious thing is. You know,
• 19:57
  Speaker 4: for me, it's like give me like the best piece
• 19:59
  Speaker 4: of cheesecake. It's like, Okay, I'm gonna have to go
• 20:02
  Speaker 4: for a forty five minute run after that and go
• 20:04
  Speaker 4: lifts some extra weights, right, Like there's always this if
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: I'm gonna do this, like true, that's pleasurable, I need
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: to work it off that. Yeah, and we really, we
• 20:15
  Speaker 4: really value it's so deep in our system, in our
• 20:19
  Speaker 4: system as society, in our psyche society, valuing this sacrifice.
• 20:24
  Speaker 4: We don't have an intrinsic belief in the value of
• 20:27
  Speaker 4: pleasure for pleasure and that has been for generations for
• 20:31
  Speaker 4: millennia in our society, right, So I think that plays
• 20:34
  Speaker 4: into it. I think we still live in a fairly misogynist,
• 20:39
  Speaker 4: patriarchal society that really doesn't like women. You could broadly
• 20:46
  Speaker 4: say that, and it really yeah, and it really doesn't really.
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 20:52
  Speaker 6: Well, I'm not gonna we're not gonna get into politics,
• 20:54
  Speaker 6: but you could see it if you watched the debate
• 20:56
  Speaker 6: last night.
• 20:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so we'll just leave it there.
• 20:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, but yeah, and I think and then
• 21:03
  Speaker 4: you add in the church a lot of people that
• 21:05
  Speaker 4: might still be religious or have grown up in the church.
• 21:07
  Speaker 4: Like there's very much these very narrow parameters under which
• 21:13
  Speaker 4: you are able to be sexual, and it really just
• 21:15
  Speaker 4: excludes whole swaths of people from sexuality that they don't
• 21:19
  Speaker 4: consider sinful or shameful or whatever. So it's just this
• 21:22
  Speaker 4: multifaceted It comes at us from all sides, and I
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: think it's almost impossible to grow up in our society
• 21:29
  Speaker 4: and not take some of that on in some way.
• 21:31
  Speaker 4: And I think what's so insidious is that it's so
• 21:34
  Speaker 4: unconscious for a lot of us that we're not thinking
• 21:37
  Speaker 4: about this, right, Like nobody's pointing at a finger at
• 21:40
  Speaker 4: us and directly saying to our faces. But we're just
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: getting bombarded with all these like micro shameful messaging that
• 21:47
  Speaker 4: it's really hard to escape. And once you become aware
• 21:50
  Speaker 4: of it, that's I think where you know you can
• 21:54
  Speaker 4: start to take have massive transformations in your not only
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: sexual life, but in your life in general. Right.
• 22:00
  Speaker 6: No, definitely, No, that's true because America especially is very puritanical. Now,
• 22:04
  Speaker 6: how is the culture in Japan since you're there now,
• 22:07
  Speaker 6: you're living there, now, how is that.
• 22:09
  Speaker 3: How do you find it? Is it different about?
• 22:12
  Speaker 4: No way?
• 22:13
  Speaker 6: Now it's similar, Okay, it's yeah.
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: They're they're you know. One of the craziest things stories
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: I've read about sexism in Japan. It's not again overtly sexual,
• 22:25
  Speaker 4: but in recent years, apparently so many, so many more
• 22:31
  Speaker 4: women were getting accepted to medical schools. And I think
• 22:34
  Speaker 4: I can't remember the name of the university here in Tokyo,
• 22:37
  Speaker 4: so don't quote me on that, but a fairly prestigious
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: university mm hmm. And the powers that be were like
• 22:44
  Speaker 4: horrified by this. So what did they do? They just
• 22:48
  Speaker 4: altered test scores based on gender, and basically women that
• 22:54
  Speaker 4: might have scored I think what I think for women
• 22:57
  Speaker 4: to be accepted, they would have had to have scored
• 22:59
  Speaker 4: something like twenty points over the male standard. They adjusted
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: the scores that much. So that's the kind of sexism
• 23:06
  Speaker 4: that goes on in Japatan.
• 23:08
  Speaker 3: That's interesting.
• 23:09
  Speaker 6: It's really interesting how afraid then are of women. It's
• 23:14
  Speaker 6: and and and you would think that it would be
• 23:17
  Speaker 6: to their benefit to not be that way.
• 23:19
  Speaker 3: It really would.
• 23:21
  Speaker 6: That's the thing that that cracks me up, because their
• 23:23
  Speaker 6: lives would be so much better if.
• 23:28
  Speaker 3: If they weren't so afraid of.
• 23:29
  Speaker 4: Us, you know. That's that's that's something that haunts me.
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: It sounds so silly, but it haunts me, and not
• 23:36
  Speaker 4: just for women when you think about any you know, disempowered,
• 23:40
  Speaker 4: disempowered or suppressed group of people in our history, Like
• 23:44
  Speaker 4: how much more beautiful would our society be? How many
• 23:47
  Speaker 4: more inventions, how many more advancements would we have if
• 23:50
  Speaker 4: we had let everybody have at the table too? Yeah? Right,
• 23:56
  Speaker 4: it's just.
• 24:00
  Speaker 3: You know, so do you most do you only see
• 24:03
  Speaker 3: women or.
• 24:04
  Speaker 6: Do you see is this specifically for women since we're
• 24:07
  Speaker 6: talking about men and women, or do you see men too?
• 24:10
  Speaker 4: Or do me anybody cares? I would say anybody is
• 24:15
  Speaker 4: capable of touchless orgasm, orgasm or touchless orgasm, regardless of gender.
• 24:20
  Speaker 4: Coming you know, my experience as a cis hat woman.
• 24:24
  Speaker 4: That's been my experience in this body. So I primarily
• 24:27
  Speaker 4: do you work with women, just because I don't feel
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: confident talking to men about their experiences because I haven't
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: experienced pleasure in that body.
• 24:36
  Speaker 6: Right, right, right, right, right, Yeah, that makes sense, totally
• 24:40
  Speaker 6: makes sense.
• 24:41
  Speaker 3: Yeah, because I want to get into a little bit
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: about your process.
• 24:48
  Speaker 6: You know, what you share with your clients and your
• 24:52
  Speaker 6: and your classes, your courses, workshops, all that kind of stuff.
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: But I just looked and we're going to be coming up.
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: We take a break. I didn't get a chance to
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: tell you this.
• 25:00
  Speaker 6: Because we were scrambling again on the show, But we
• 25:03
  Speaker 6: take a commercial break for a couple of minutes at midtime, Mark.
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: So let's take it here. We'll come back and then
• 25:08
  Speaker 3: I want to talk more.
• 25:09
  Speaker 6: About the process of what you teach us with the
• 25:12
  Speaker 6: touchless orgasm. All right, everybody stay tuned and we'll be
• 25:15
  Speaker 6: back in just a couple of minutes.
• 25:20
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  Speaker 6: to the Universe, Creating the Life you Crave at four
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  Speaker 6: mystics and creatives who enrich our lives. Hey, everybody, welcome
• 28:23
  Speaker 6: back if you're just joining me. I have Jen Watkey
• 28:26
  Speaker 6: and she is a pleasure and orgasm coach and she
• 28:31
  Speaker 6: helps all of us whoever is interested, learn the touchless
• 28:36
  Speaker 6: orgasm method. It's a revolutionary approach that she has been
• 28:44
  Speaker 6: focusing on how to connect with our pleasure, which I
• 28:48
  Speaker 6: think is really fascinating. So Jen, can you share a
• 28:52
  Speaker 6: little bit about why is the process?
• 28:56
  Speaker 3: Like, like somebody who's listening and is like, you know,
• 28:59
  Speaker 3: I kind of want to explore that, But what is
• 29:01
  Speaker 3: it gonna look like? What are we gonna do? You
• 29:04
  Speaker 3: know kind of thing. What do I what homework do
• 29:07
  Speaker 3: I have to do? That kind of stuff.
• 29:11
  Speaker 4: I think it's some of the best homework you'll ever have.
• 29:14
  Speaker 3: That's what I was thinking too, right.
• 29:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah, So there's kind of three main elements that we
• 29:22
  Speaker 4: work on in touchless Orgasm, So it's body, mind, and
• 29:26
  Speaker 4: pleasure building. So mm hmmm. Starting with the body kind
• 29:31
  Speaker 4: of there's two main elements here. So we want to
• 29:36
  Speaker 4: reconnect and get us out of any numbness that is
• 29:39
  Speaker 4: there so that we can really feel into the sensations
• 29:43
  Speaker 4: of pleasure that is inside of our body. And we
• 29:45
  Speaker 4: also want to use our body as a tool to
• 29:49
  Speaker 4: sort of liberate some of that you know gunk I
• 29:52
  Speaker 4: was talking about earlier. Yeah, that is stuck inside of us.
• 29:55
  Speaker 4: We wanted to liberate, So we use things like breath work,
• 29:59
  Speaker 4: sound funding movement, so sort of just release anything that's
• 30:05
  Speaker 4: inside of the body that is not in service to
• 30:07
  Speaker 4: pleasure and is keeping us from accessing our pleasure. And then,
• 30:10
  Speaker 4: like I said, we work on the sensitization of our bodies,
• 30:14
  Speaker 4: which is super fun. And then of course the mind piece,
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: the mind in the body have to work together, right.
• 30:20
  Speaker 4: We can't get to pleasure building unless they're working together.
• 30:22
  Speaker 4: So the mind, we have a lot of tools that
• 30:29
  Speaker 4: sort of help us. Like when we start releasing some
• 30:31
  Speaker 4: of that stuff in the body, our mind can kind
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: of be like, oh my God, Like I shoved all
• 30:35
  Speaker 4: of this down the well for a reason, because, like
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: I was talking earlier, like if we're going to feel pleasure,
• 30:40
  Speaker 4: sometimes we have to feel all of that pain. So
• 30:43
  Speaker 4: we have tools to allow the mind to sort of
• 30:46
  Speaker 4: like deal with I kind of think of them as
• 30:49
  Speaker 4: mind freaks when our mind freaks out because we've started
• 30:53
  Speaker 4: looking at some of the stuff. So there's tools to
• 30:55
  Speaker 4: help us calm and self soothe and to deal with
• 30:58
  Speaker 4: some of that stuff that gets released as we start
• 31:00
  Speaker 4: to sort of release the pleasure, and then we really
• 31:04
  Speaker 4: use the mind. Our mind is so incredibly powerful, Like
• 31:07
  Speaker 4: I said, we can have this touchles orgasm in sleep
• 31:09
  Speaker 4: and we can have it awake. So it's so crazy,
• 31:12
  Speaker 4: so powerful. So we harness that power of the mind
• 31:15
  Speaker 4: so that we can start sort of creating these new
• 31:19
  Speaker 4: pathways to pleasure, neural pathways, so that we can have
• 31:23
  Speaker 4: the pleasure that we want, we can have the orgasms
• 31:26
  Speaker 4: that we want, and then the last piece is putting
• 31:29
  Speaker 4: it all together right into pleasure building. So to give
• 31:33
  Speaker 4: us to put give an example of sort of putting
• 31:36
  Speaker 4: that all together so people can sort of conceptualize what
• 31:38
  Speaker 4: it actually is like in practice, one of the most
• 31:43
  Speaker 4: I don't one of the beginner practices, and I call
• 31:46
  Speaker 4: it just beginner just because anybody listening can do this
• 31:50
  Speaker 4: on their own, like you don't need a whole bunch
• 31:51
  Speaker 4: of tools or guidance. Is simply a pleasure meditation. So
• 31:57
  Speaker 4: I recommend doing it either right before you get out
• 31:59
  Speaker 4: of bed or right before you fall to sleep, and
• 32:01
  Speaker 4: you just kind of do all the traditional meditation things
• 32:05
  Speaker 4: to calm the mind, right, like breathing, visualizing, putting any
• 32:10
  Speaker 4: intrusive thoughts in a container, that kind of thing to
• 32:12
  Speaker 4: get started. And then we just turn our attention inward
• 32:16
  Speaker 4: to the body and you just breathe, and you almost
• 32:20
  Speaker 4: you do a scan like head to toe, like what
• 32:22
  Speaker 4: am I feeling? What's alive in my body? Like is
• 32:25
  Speaker 4: there any tingling anywhere? Is anything hot? Cold? Any sensations?
• 32:29
  Speaker 4: So we just do that little scan like what's alive
• 32:32
  Speaker 4: in my body?
• 32:32
  Speaker 3: Right?
• 32:33
  Speaker 4: Now, and then we end at our genitals, so we
• 32:36
  Speaker 4: really focus and just spend like people can even do
• 32:39
  Speaker 4: this listening as I'm talking. Yeah, just putting the focus
• 32:43
  Speaker 4: on genitals, like what do I feel, what's alive right now?
• 32:50
  Speaker 4: And then just breathing and just staying with the sensations
• 32:55
  Speaker 4: in the genitals for as long as possible, just letting
• 32:59
  Speaker 4: that hmmm sort of whatever is there.
• 33:03
  Speaker 6: And allowing whatever, allowing it.
• 33:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah, And it might the first time people do this,
• 33:10
  Speaker 4: they might not be able to identify or feel a sensation.
• 33:14
  Speaker 3: And that's what I was thinking.
• 33:16
  Speaker 6: I was thinking because because like I said earlier, so
• 33:20
  Speaker 6: we're so disconnected sometimes with our bodies that you might
• 33:23
  Speaker 6: be like, I don't feel anything, right, yeah, and.
• 33:27
  Speaker 4: A numbness Yeah, And in the context of touchless orgasm,
• 33:31
  Speaker 4: numbness is a sensation, numblet Numbness is is a feeling.
• 33:36
  Speaker 4: Numbness is something that is alive, right, It's just the absence. Right.
• 33:40
  Speaker 4: So if that is the case, somebody's like, oh my god,
• 33:42
  Speaker 4: what is she talking about. I can't feel anything. That's okay,
• 33:46
  Speaker 4: totally normal. You just continue to keep your awareness there,
• 33:50
  Speaker 4: you keep breathing, and if it feels safe, to do.
• 33:54
  Speaker 4: So sometimes numbness can come with a feeling of I
• 33:56
  Speaker 4: don't feel safe to experience pleasure. But if it, if
• 33:59
  Speaker 4: it feels safe, you can let your mind sort of
• 34:04
  Speaker 4: imagine what pleasure would feel like if it was there,
• 34:08
  Speaker 4: m right, and sort of just and that's the super
• 34:12
  Speaker 4: simple beginner exercise, and just feel into that and see
• 34:16
  Speaker 4: what's there. And the other thing too is this is
• 34:18
  Speaker 4: not going to be the same every time, of course, right,
• 34:21
  Speaker 4: So some days you might have that numbness, some days
• 34:24
  Speaker 4: you might feel you know a little bit more whatever
• 34:26
  Speaker 4: it is for you, maybe it's tingling or pulsing or
• 34:29
  Speaker 4: champagne bubbles, whatever, and the next day it could be
• 34:32
  Speaker 4: much more alive and sort of in your face. So
• 34:37
  Speaker 4: it can really really vary. But the key is that
• 34:40
  Speaker 4: you're carving out time to focus on your body, on
• 34:45
  Speaker 4: your pleasure, and you're not judging it. You're not like
• 34:47
  Speaker 4: trying to do something with it. You're simply going to
• 34:51
  Speaker 4: experience whatever is there in that moment. For it can
• 34:55
  Speaker 4: be as little as five minutes at the start.
• 34:57
  Speaker 6: H Yeah, that's very simple. I mean it's not really
• 35:01
  Speaker 6: a very difficult exercise. It's good to scan your body
• 35:05
  Speaker 6: anyway as part of a meditation, just to see because
• 35:09
  Speaker 6: we ignore our bodies a lot, and it's giving us
• 35:12
  Speaker 6: clues about things that are going on, right, like why
• 35:15
  Speaker 6: do I have this eight here?
• 35:16
  Speaker 3: What is this pain here? What is this you know?
• 35:19
  Speaker 3: What is this sensation here?
• 35:20
  Speaker 6: So so since we do that a lot anyway, why
• 35:24
  Speaker 6: not add some pleasure to our experience.
• 35:27
  Speaker 4: So I think it just totally.
• 35:29
  Speaker 6: So let me ask you, Well, first, I wanted just
• 35:32
  Speaker 6: to say this before I ask you this question.
• 35:34
  Speaker 3: I thought this was.
• 35:36
  Speaker 6: One of the things that I have done in my
• 35:39
  Speaker 6: workshops about because talking about self love is I have
• 35:43
  Speaker 6: a photography background, so I'm a visual artist. So I
• 35:48
  Speaker 6: have people do self portraits as part of self love,
• 35:52
  Speaker 6: but not selfies. Very different from selfies, you know.
• 35:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and it makes me very uncomfortable.
• 36:01
  Speaker 6: It's very it's a very uncomfortable exercise because you have
• 36:04
  Speaker 6: to really look at yourself and and and you know,
• 36:08
  Speaker 6: and it's learning to visually look at yourself and love
• 36:12
  Speaker 6: yourself in a different way, right because it's self portrait
• 36:15
  Speaker 6: doesn't necessarily have to be what people would traditionally think,
• 36:19
  Speaker 6: So people get really creative when they start start doing that.
• 36:23
  Speaker 6: So I just thought like when we were talking about
• 36:26
  Speaker 6: when thinking I was thinking that when you were talking
• 36:28
  Speaker 6: about how it's such a practice of love, this selfless
• 36:33
  Speaker 6: this pleasure, that this self pleasure that you're teaching women
• 36:37
  Speaker 6: especially how to do right, because that's really what it is.
• 36:41
  Speaker 3: Because people who.
• 36:41
  Speaker 6: Don't love themselves or don't even want to try to
• 36:44
  Speaker 6: love themselves are not going to be your clients.
• 36:46
  Speaker 3: They're not going to come to you.
• 36:48
  Speaker 6: There's some there, you know, energetically, they aren't a whole
• 36:50
  Speaker 6: different They're in a whole different space. We come to
• 36:54
  Speaker 6: people like you when we are rediscovering ourselves, when we're
• 36:57
  Speaker 6: learning how to love ourselves and we need help in assistance.
• 37:01
  Speaker 3: Wouldn't you agree totally?
• 37:03
  Speaker 4: Yep, yeah, yeah. And it's it's interesting too, how many
• 37:07
  Speaker 4: couple things in what you said. I get a lot
• 37:11
  Speaker 4: of women who are like I just know there's more.
• 37:14
  Speaker 4: They can't articulate it. So there's this like desire to
• 37:17
  Speaker 4: grow into something that brings people to me, which is amazing.
• 37:22
  Speaker 4: And you know, going back to what you're talking about
• 37:24
  Speaker 4: with a self portrait, it reminded me of one of
• 37:26
  Speaker 4: my most powerful pleasure practices that I have done for myself.
• 37:29
  Speaker 4: This was inside of my coach training was to pleasure
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: yourself while watching yourself in the mirror. And I was like,
• 37:38
  Speaker 4: what are you talking about? Oh my god, I can't
• 37:41
  Speaker 4: do that. But I was like, I was like, I'm
• 37:47
  Speaker 4: gonna do it, right, I'm gonna I'm gonna do the
• 37:49
  Speaker 4: uncomfortable things. I'm gonna look at the things I'm not
• 37:52
  Speaker 4: gonna It was for me, it was very much like
• 37:54
  Speaker 4: I'm not gonna look away from myself in this moment, right,
• 37:58
  Speaker 4: Like when you start to look away from yourself and
• 38:00
  Speaker 4: I know that that can feel so scary to do
• 38:02
  Speaker 4: the self portrait that you've talked about, or you know,
• 38:04
  Speaker 4: watch yourself in pleasure. But I was like, I've paid
• 38:07
  Speaker 4: so much money to be in this course. I'm not
• 38:09
  Speaker 4: gonna look away. I'm not gonna look away, right, And
• 38:12
  Speaker 4: so I did it. And at the start, I was like, oh,
• 38:16
  Speaker 4: this is so awkward. But then like a few minutes
• 38:19
  Speaker 4: into it, I was like, hot, damn mama, Like I
• 38:23
  Speaker 4: love that. Like my body's my body's my body's far
• 38:28
  Speaker 4: from perfect, but I was like there was something about
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: watching myself in pleasure. I was like, that's beautiful and
• 38:35
  Speaker 4: hot for any human being, like to watch another person
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: in pleasure, like it was really really an amazing experience
• 38:41
  Speaker 4: that you know, I would never have done had I
• 38:44
  Speaker 4: not been in this course and again forced myself to
• 38:48
  Speaker 4: not look away from myself. So that was.
• 38:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it was good.
• 38:52
  Speaker 6: No, that makes sense. And I guarantee you. I guarantee you.
• 38:55
  Speaker 6: Anybody listening to what you just said right now, just
• 38:58
  Speaker 6: check in with how you felt when she said that,
• 39:00
  Speaker 6: imagining yourself.
• 39:02
  Speaker 3: If you went like this, oh, I don't you know, like.
• 39:06
  Speaker 6: You cringed, or you're like oh I could never or
• 39:08
  Speaker 6: you know, you felt like yourself tense up, then you
• 39:11
  Speaker 6: probably need to do it.
• 39:13
  Speaker 4: Yes, exactly, exactly right. It's those moments of like wow,
• 39:19
  Speaker 4: that's often tells us where we need to go. Everybody listening,
• 39:22
  Speaker 4: please go watch yourself self pleasure tonight. Yeah, let us
• 39:29
  Speaker 4: know how it went.
• 39:32
  Speaker 3: No, I think it's good because I mean, we're here having.
• 39:36
  Speaker 6: This human experience, right like, well, whatever your belief is,
• 39:40
  Speaker 6: wherever you came from, you know, I mean to me,
• 39:43
  Speaker 6: we come from a universal energy God, you know, and
• 39:47
  Speaker 6: we're having this human experience and so we're supposed to
• 39:51
  Speaker 6: have pleasure. We're supposed to love ourselves. We're supposed this
• 39:56
  Speaker 6: is why we're here. We're here to love ourselves and others,
• 40:00
  Speaker 6: or we would have be here. So it's just another
• 40:05
  Speaker 6: to me layer of self love, but through sexuality, through
• 40:11
  Speaker 6: your own sexuality in your own body, of.
• 40:13
  Speaker 3: What your work that you're doing.
• 40:14
  Speaker 4: Yeah, and I think I agree exactly what you said,
• 40:19
  Speaker 4: Like we are here for no other reason than to
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: experience pleasure. Yeah, and to connect with other humans. Like
• 40:30
  Speaker 4: that's I don't know, that's all there is really, Like
• 40:34
  Speaker 4: everything else is just noise in a lot of ways,
• 40:38
  Speaker 4: you think, Yeah, I think so too.
• 40:42
  Speaker 3: I think so too.
• 40:43
  Speaker 6: So Now, what do you recommend for somebody listening? Because
• 40:48
  Speaker 6: I personally know a lot of women who have sexual trauma,
• 40:54
  Speaker 6: and you know this, I imagine for someone who has does
• 41:00
  Speaker 6: this kind of work is very you know, I don't
• 41:04
  Speaker 6: know the word I'm looking for, Like, I just imagine
• 41:07
  Speaker 6: it's more intense. Maybe if there's like a sexual trauma
• 41:11
  Speaker 6: component when you're coming to this kind of work, how
• 41:14
  Speaker 6: would you what would you say to somebody who has
• 41:17
  Speaker 6: had some sexual trauma and how this can be healing
• 41:19
  Speaker 6: for them?
• 41:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I think anybody that has had sexual trauma, if
• 41:27
  Speaker 4: first and foremost, if they can see if they have
• 41:30
  Speaker 4: not if they are able to see a professional. That's
• 41:35
  Speaker 4: the first thing I recommend. Like, you need somebody, and
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: it's somebody to be able to guide you through that
• 41:40
  Speaker 4: into hold space, and sometimes that is a therapist. You
• 41:44
  Speaker 4: need a therapist. I want to be very clear, I'm
• 41:47
  Speaker 4: not a therapist. I'm not a counselor. I am a coach.
• 41:49
  Speaker 4: It's a very different modality. So somebody that has really
• 41:54
  Speaker 4: like deep deep trauma and like that is having like
• 41:58
  Speaker 4: PTSD reactions, sometimes they need to that's a therapy situation.
• 42:04
  Speaker 4: But if it's trauma in the sense that you have wounding,
• 42:08
  Speaker 4: but you're not going into terror, you're not going into PTSD,
• 42:12
  Speaker 4: then you might not need a therapist. You might have
• 42:14
  Speaker 4: more options in terms of who you can need to
• 42:17
  Speaker 4: hold space for you, but you can also self heal. Right, Like,
• 42:22
  Speaker 4: there's the first thing I would say is go do
• 42:25
  Speaker 4: get on the internet, go do some research because there
• 42:27
  Speaker 4: are a lot of coaches like myself who have a
• 42:30
  Speaker 4: lot of great free resources out there. So there are
• 42:32
  Speaker 4: a lot of practices and tools that you can learn
• 42:37
  Speaker 4: to start the process on your own. If you don't
• 42:40
  Speaker 4: have the ability to go and see a professional and
• 42:43
  Speaker 4: be kind to yourself, right, Like, yeah, it's not an
• 42:50
  Speaker 4: overnight thing to heal from wounding, to heal from trauma,
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: but I truly believe that we all have the capacity
• 42:56
  Speaker 4: to do that healing work. And I think when we
• 43:00
  Speaker 4: come out on the other side, like you know, it's
• 43:03
  Speaker 4: the whole. There's this phrase in I can't remember the
• 43:06
  Speaker 4: actual phrase, but there's this concept in Japanese of like
• 43:10
  Speaker 4: pottery that's been broken, yes, and then they put it back.
• 43:14
  Speaker 4: I can't think of the word yea, and I think
• 43:17
  Speaker 4: it's such a beautiful Yeah, I know, I can't think
• 43:20
  Speaker 4: of the word symbol of humans as well, right, So
• 43:23
  Speaker 4: if you can heal from that trauma, you're going to
• 43:25
  Speaker 4: be more beautiful and more powerful for it. And I
• 43:28
  Speaker 4: think for anybody, for any trauma, sexual or otherwise, I
• 43:32
  Speaker 4: think the really, really the first key is to always
• 43:34
  Speaker 4: just connect with the body, like do a version of
• 43:38
  Speaker 4: the meditation that I mentioned earlier, like connect with your
• 43:43
  Speaker 4: body and connect with whatever pleasure is there. I think
• 43:45
  Speaker 4: that's a good first step that somebody can do that's
• 43:48
  Speaker 4: really gentle and really kind to yourself and doesn't take
• 43:50
  Speaker 4: you too far, doesn't like push you back into that trauma.
• 43:54
  Speaker 4: And just yeah, it's it's all in the body. That
• 43:58
  Speaker 4: trauma lives in the body, that's where it all needs
• 44:00
  Speaker 4: to be released from.
• 44:02
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it definitely does. It stores in the body. And
• 44:05
  Speaker 3: and as.
• 44:05
  Speaker 6: We are evolving, we're seeing more and more evidence of
• 44:09
  Speaker 6: how disase settles in the body and manifests as a disease,
• 44:13
  Speaker 6: right or or a pain or something. So, So when
• 44:18
  Speaker 6: when somebody does your touchless Orgasm workshop, is.
• 44:25
  Speaker 3: It is it a few weeks? What does it look
• 44:27
  Speaker 3: like like.
• 44:28
  Speaker 4: For Yeah, So currently on my site, I have a
• 44:33
  Speaker 4: freebie that people can sign up for. It gets them started.
• 44:37
  Speaker 4: I'm in the process of completing a book on it,
• 44:41
  Speaker 4: which okay, probably will be about two weeks. That book's
• 44:44
  Speaker 4: going to be five bucks, and it's totally work at
• 44:47
  Speaker 4: your own pace, okay. And then if people want to
• 44:52
  Speaker 4: sort of get a little bit more support, there's some
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: options to have like guided meditations instead of just having
• 44:58
  Speaker 4: to do it on your own from the book. So
• 45:00
  Speaker 4: there's a few levels depending on people's how far they
• 45:03
  Speaker 4: want to go into the work, what their financial ability is.
• 45:06
  Speaker 4: Starts it starts at five bucks, and it goes up
• 45:08
  Speaker 4: to one on one coaching, right, but everything they need
• 45:12
  Speaker 4: in touchless orgasm is in the book, and I really think,
• 45:16
  Speaker 4: how long does it take? That's so individual, right, some
• 45:19
  Speaker 4: people might not want to go to touchless orgasm like that
• 45:22
  Speaker 4: may maybe too much of a party trick that they
• 45:24
  Speaker 4: don't need kind of kind of thing, right, Yeah, But
• 45:29
  Speaker 4: so even if you so, they can those people can
• 45:33
  Speaker 4: just work on the touchless pleasure and reconnecting with the
• 45:35
  Speaker 4: pleasure in their body and that comes a little bit quicker,
• 45:37
  Speaker 4: that ability to find out pleasure. So it's really so
• 45:40
  Speaker 4: dependent on the sexual ecology the person is coming in
• 45:44
  Speaker 4: with and where they want to go. I personally think
• 45:48
  Speaker 4: that this is a lifelong practice. Yeah, like I do.
• 45:53
  Speaker 4: I am in touch with my pleasure in touch I'm
• 45:56
  Speaker 4: using air quotes. You can see me in touch without
• 45:58
  Speaker 4: touching on a daily basis, right, Like I always tune
• 46:01
  Speaker 4: in with my body, like what feels pleasurable right now,
• 46:05
  Speaker 4: And depending on my mood and what's happening in my day,
• 46:07
  Speaker 4: like I might spend I might spend half an hour
• 46:09
  Speaker 4: like playing with that pleasure building it up, and if
• 46:12
  Speaker 4: I have for me, it's longer. And this again is
• 46:14
  Speaker 4: very dependent if I want to go to the full
• 46:16
  Speaker 4: touchless orgasm, that's like I'm carving out Sunday, you know,
• 46:20
  Speaker 4: and I'm playing.
• 46:20
  Speaker 3: You're carving out a lot of time for yourself.
• 46:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, to just like.
• 46:25
  Speaker 6: But you do it like with a group or do
• 46:28
  Speaker 6: you have like a sacred group that talks about their
• 46:31
  Speaker 6: experiences together, like or is this that everybody's.
• 46:35
  Speaker 3: Just working on their own pace.
• 46:37
  Speaker 6: With you with what you're you're off your different offsprings.
• 46:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it depends on It depends on the level of
• 46:44
  Speaker 4: support that they want. There is a group that they
• 46:49
  Speaker 4: it's a monthly fee that they can join, and my
• 46:53
  Speaker 4: clients have actually loved those live sessions. It's so that's
• 46:57
  Speaker 4: where I mean, everybody's at home in front of their
• 46:59
  Speaker 4: computer and I basically walk them through anywhere probably about
• 47:03
  Speaker 4: an hour a completely live practice, a live touch with
• 47:07
  Speaker 4: orgasm practice.
• 47:08
  Speaker 6: Okay, that's what I wanted to know because I want
• 47:11
  Speaker 6: people to understand that because some people are that's going
• 47:13
  Speaker 6: to be like, oh, I would really like to experience that,
• 47:16
  Speaker 6: And then some people are gonna be like, oh no,
• 47:17
  Speaker 6: I don't want to be with other people that just
• 47:20
  Speaker 6: you know, I you know, I'm not in that space yet.
• 47:23
  Speaker 6: So okay, So there's a lot of options for people.
• 47:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's good. Yeah, okay, So what have.
• 47:29
  Speaker 6: You found is the one of the most common issues
• 47:34
  Speaker 6: that your clients get when you know, what gets in
• 47:37
  Speaker 6: the way of their pleasure?
• 47:38
  Speaker 3: Like, what's common for us humans?
• 47:41
  Speaker 4: What do we usually do? Yeah, ooh, that's such a
• 47:46
  Speaker 4: good question. I think I've been a little bit surprised
• 47:52
  Speaker 4: by how often when people get into the work, religious
• 47:56
  Speaker 4: conditioning comes up for them. That's been fairly common. And
• 48:01
  Speaker 4: body issue, I think comes up almost for every woman
• 48:04
  Speaker 4: that's taken the course. So those are kind of too,
• 48:07
  Speaker 4: the big ones. Yeah, with with a good amount of
• 48:10
  Speaker 4: shame sort of intermingled throat there for good measure, sort
• 48:13
  Speaker 4: of woven through everything.
• 48:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah, shame is interesting, man.
• 48:18
  Speaker 6: We really need to transmute shame, halpemize shame on a
• 48:24
  Speaker 6: global scale. I mean, because I think everybody has it
• 48:28
  Speaker 6: or has dealt with it at one point in their life.
• 48:31
  Speaker 3: You know about something it's just amazing.
• 48:34
  Speaker 6: So I didn't get a chance to ask you in
• 48:37
  Speaker 6: the in the beginning you said you came from a
• 48:39
  Speaker 6: conservative family in Canada. What do your parents think about
• 48:44
  Speaker 6: the work that you're doing, that you're doing this, what
• 48:46
  Speaker 6: do they.
• 48:47
  Speaker 3: Say to you?
• 48:49
  Speaker 4: Goodness, I wouldn't say they're I always wanted to defend them.
• 48:52
  Speaker 4: I'm like, they're not really. I mean, I grew up
• 48:54
  Speaker 4: in Alberta, which is probably the most conservative providence kind
• 48:57
  Speaker 4: of Oka. But I'm always like, I don't know what
• 48:59
  Speaker 4: my family really conservative. But then sometimes my parents say
• 49:02
  Speaker 4: things about politics and various other things. I'm like, oh
• 49:05
  Speaker 4: my god, you're so conservative. They just don't ask.
• 49:09
  Speaker 3: Now they don't ask, Okay.
• 49:11
  Speaker 4: They I mean they know, they know that I'm doing
• 49:15
  Speaker 4: the work. And sometimes I'll you know, I'll tell them.
• 49:18
  Speaker 4: I'll tell them something positive that's happening in the business,
• 49:21
  Speaker 4: like oh, I got a new client, direct finish writing
• 49:23
  Speaker 4: my book or whatever, and they're like, okay, are you
• 49:26
  Speaker 4: making money? Like okay, yeah.
• 49:29
  Speaker 6: So they don't say like, oh, this is my daughter
• 49:31
  Speaker 6: Jen and she teaches touch the shortcasts.
• 49:34
  Speaker 4: Oh good lord.
• 49:35
  Speaker 3: No, that would be awesome if they did, right, But you.
• 49:39
  Speaker 4: Know, no. But you know what's funny is there are
• 49:43
  Speaker 4: some I don't they're not gonna listen to this. I
• 49:48
  Speaker 4: do have friends, family members, and some some some children
• 49:55
  Speaker 4: of some friends that will that will ask me things
• 49:59
  Speaker 4: that that they know the I do it. And even
• 50:00
  Speaker 4: though like this is definitely not something we ever talked
• 50:02
  Speaker 4: about at the dinner table, but they there have been
• 50:06
  Speaker 4: some young people who have asked me about sexuality and
• 50:10
  Speaker 4: they're like, you know, I've heard like you're the only
• 50:12
  Speaker 4: adult that I know is not gonna lie about this,
• 50:14
  Speaker 4: or you're the only adult I can even ask about this.
• 50:17
  Speaker 4: So that fills me with so much joy that even though,
• 50:22
  Speaker 4: like I said, my older conservative family they're like, we
• 50:25
  Speaker 4: don't talk about it. But to know that some of
• 50:28
  Speaker 4: the younger people are listening, yeah, and are asking questions
• 50:32
  Speaker 4: and feel safe to ask questions warms my heart. But
• 50:35
  Speaker 4: the flip side of that is that they should have
• 50:37
  Speaker 4: somebody else to go to, you like, what a yes,
• 50:40
  Speaker 4: what about all the other people that don't have like
• 50:41
  Speaker 4: anti gen or friend gen you know, Like, oh, I'm
• 50:45
  Speaker 4: like where are they getting their information? So yeah, I
• 50:48
  Speaker 4: think we have so much work to do still, but
• 50:52
  Speaker 4: I do, but I feel like.
• 50:53
  Speaker 6: The younger generation though, they are much more open than
• 50:59
  Speaker 6: well my generation anyway, I'm jen X.
• 51:02
  Speaker 3: I don't know where are you a millennial? Would you
• 51:05
  Speaker 3: be a millennial?
• 51:06
  Speaker 5: Right on?
• 51:07
  Speaker 4: I'm nineteen seventy six, I'm right on the cusp.
• 51:09
  Speaker 6: You're right on the Cusp. Okay, Yeah, so the young
• 51:12
  Speaker 6: gen Ziers. My niece is a teenager, she's a gen
• 51:16
  Speaker 6: Zer and I just hear the way she talks about things.
• 51:21
  Speaker 6: There's so much more open and accepting, and you know,
• 51:24
  Speaker 6: people like, you know, trying to get the gender identity thing.
• 51:28
  Speaker 6: I'm always I always consult her because I'm like, what
• 51:31
  Speaker 6: is that?
• 51:31
  Speaker 5: Now?
• 51:32
  Speaker 3: How is they that?
• 51:33
  Speaker 5: Like?
• 51:33
  Speaker 6: I want to be respectful, you know, so I'm like
• 51:36
  Speaker 6: trying to understand it.
• 51:37
  Speaker 3: So she's my consultant.
• 51:40
  Speaker 4: Yeah, fourteen. It's funny, yes.
• 51:43
  Speaker 6: But they are so hopefully they will you know, not
• 51:48
  Speaker 6: carry as much shames as we have around our own sexuality.
• 51:53
  Speaker 4: You know, it feels very promising and it feels very positive.
• 51:59
  Speaker 4: You know. One thing I think is happening. I mean,
• 52:03
  Speaker 4: I realize I'm in the fields. White perception is somewhat skewed,
• 52:06
  Speaker 4: but there are so many women who are stepping into
• 52:09
  Speaker 4: this work. Yeah, spiritual work, sexuality work. It very much
• 52:13
  Speaker 4: feels to me that there is I think of it
• 52:16
  Speaker 4: as a quiet revolution going on. Yeah, women are you know,
• 52:20
  Speaker 4: know what you mean. Yeah, they might not be you know,
• 52:22
  Speaker 4: on the global scale yet, but they're in their communities,
• 52:24
  Speaker 4: in their own lives, with their friends, with their families.
• 52:26
  Speaker 4: They are stepping into this power. And I think we're
• 52:31
  Speaker 4: living in such amazing times largely for that reason that
• 52:35
  Speaker 4: women are making the shift and men are too. Right,
• 52:38
  Speaker 4: there is I think it's not just women. There is
• 52:41
  Speaker 4: this shift into like more spirituality, more kindness, more consciousness,
• 52:45
  Speaker 4: more like let's evolve, and it's it's so amazing to
• 52:49
  Speaker 4: be a part of that right now. Like I find
• 52:52
  Speaker 4: it so joyful me too.
• 52:54
  Speaker 6: I definitely see a lot of women who are middle
• 52:57
  Speaker 6: aged that you have grown children or whatever, and they're
• 53:00
  Speaker 6: reclaiming their power. They're like, all right, what do I
• 53:02
  Speaker 6: want now for this part of my life, the second
• 53:06
  Speaker 6: half of my life or whatever. Yeah, it's pretty amazing.
• 53:08
  Speaker 6: I see it and I can feel it. So is
• 53:11
  Speaker 6: there anything that because we only have like a couple
• 53:14
  Speaker 6: of minutes that I really want to give you the
• 53:15
  Speaker 6: opportunity to share with us about your what you're doing,
• 53:19
  Speaker 6: or the work, or our own sexuality or pleasure.
• 53:25
  Speaker 4: I would just say to people that you're not broken.
• 53:29
  Speaker 4: No matter where you are is where you need to be,
• 53:32
  Speaker 4: and you can start from any point and you have
• 53:37
  Speaker 4: unlimited capacity for pleasure. But it is up to you
• 53:42
  Speaker 4: to decide if you're going to move toward that.
• 53:45
  Speaker 6: Yeah, And I didn't get a chance to share how
• 53:48
  Speaker 6: people can find you, So tell everybody what the best
• 53:51
  Speaker 6: way to find you is.
• 53:52
  Speaker 3: If they want to work.
• 53:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they can head on over to my site, which
• 53:56
  Speaker 4: is Jenwatke dot com and most active social media is Instagram,
• 54:02
  Speaker 4: which is also Jen wad key perfect.
• 54:05
  Speaker 6: Thank you so much, Jen, I'm glad we got yeah,
• 54:08
  Speaker 6: we got going and we got moving.
• 54:09
  Speaker 3: It was really fun talking to you.
• 54:12
  Speaker 6: I really enjoyed it, all right, everybody, thanks for listening
• 54:15
  Speaker 6: to Postcards to the Universe with Melissa creating the life
• 54:18
  Speaker 6: you crave. And I'm wishing everyone a wonderful week filled
• 54:22
  Speaker 6: with joy, abundance and love.
• 54:25
  Speaker 3: Peace,