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Empathy Meets Success: Heart-Led Leadership with Dame Clarissa Burt · The Heart-Led Business Show

• 0:01
  Speaker 2: Welcome to the Heart Led Business Show, where compassion meets commerce and leaders lead with love.
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: Join your host, Tom Jackobs, as he delves into the insightful conversations with visionary business leaders who defy the status quo, putting humanity first and profit second.
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: From heartfelt strategies to inspiring stories, this podcast is your compass in the world of conscious capitalism.
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: So buckle up and let's go.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: Let your heart guide your business journey.
• 0:36
  Tom Jackobs: Ladies and lads, lend your lobes for a lusciously luminous lark with the one and only, the Queen of Charisma and Charm, Clarissa Burt.
• 0:45
  Tom Jackobs: She's the CEO shining in the limelight, the Chief Assurance Officer crafting confidence with her self esteem regimen, and the award winning author.
• 0:55
  Tom Jackobs: Adding sass to the prose.
• 0:57
  Tom Jackobs: So buckle up buttercups, because today on the Heart Led Business Show, we're diving deep into the heartbeats of her sparkling empire, Clarissa, welcome to the show.
• 1:06
  Clarissa Burt: I am so thrilled to be here.
• 1:07
  Clarissa Burt: It's good to see you I know we had a pre show some months ago and it's good to see you again now.
• 1:11
  Tom Jackobs: So good to see you as well and I'm glad you're surviving the heat there Arizona.
• 1:16
  Clarissa Burt: Yes.
• 1:16
  Tom Jackobs: So tell me, what's your definition of a Heart Led Business?
• 1:20
  Clarissa Burt: Think first of all we have to always remember that it's really important also as a leader to be a critical thinker, right?
• 1:25
  Clarissa Burt: We're leading a team of people that still have to be doing research, analyses and evaluations of whatever it is that we're doing.
• 1:32
  Clarissa Burt: But I think that it's important also to lead with objectivity and fairness and flexibility as well so that I think is really one of the most important aspects to understand about leading with your heart we all want to be doing good there is also a bottom line to.Be worried about.
• 1:46
  Clarissa Burt: Let's just call a spade it is what it is but I think that heartfelt leadership is also it's also bringing self care, knowing how to, the leader himself is taking care of himself and he's making sure that self care is involved somewhere along the line with his team, because you're going to get the best work from people that are feeling the best about themselves.
• 2:03
  Clarissa Burt: And, I know that, just from reading my book, it was really important that we really step up for ourselves in that realm, enough sleep, eating properly, all the things, but self care is really important I think another word that we hear a lot, but it is really paramount is the authenticity of it all you really have to embrace being authentic and sharing what you know, and also being able to say as a leader, it's that's not really my forte, would you guys mind getting some more information on that so we can make?
• 2:29
  Clarissa Burt: A critical thinking, more, more educated decision so I think that's also a really important part of being heart led and heartfelt when you're working in your businesses, a human connection is really important.
• 2:41
  Clarissa Burt: Also, when we're in the, in the throws, in the boardroom, in the meetings and the things that we do, we also have to understand, that the most important thing we're doing is connecting with the end user, the people that are going to be benefiting by the work that we're doing so keeping that always in mind.
• 2:55
  Clarissa Burt: And I think that heartfelt businesses also lead with empathy they lead with some sympathy at times, but certainly with empathy so to be championing that frequently, and keeping that forefront, I think is really important we also have a purpose when, we are leading never veer from or steer away from the end game, the end goal, and what is the actual purpose that we are here for.
• 3:19
  Clarissa Burt: And then knowing that, again, it's impact, right?
• 3:21
  Clarissa Burt: That bottom line, knowing that we're hitting our bottom line at the same time but and never feeling guilty about that, I you fed it already to me, and that is should we ever feel, bad or guilty or blame, do the blame, shame, guilt game on ourselves when it comes to cutting our check for the hard work that we have done as well?
• 3:39
  Clarissa Burt: And I'd like to think that the answer to that is certainly not, we were working, we're working toward the end, we're working with our hearts, always in our heart beating for our purpose driven model, but at the same time, yeah, it's okay to go ahead and to nobody else is going to pay your bills right unless you do, so yes, certainly.
• 3:56
  Tom Jackobs: Totally.
• 3:57
  Tom Jackobs: I'd like to go back to one thing that you said about the critical thinking as one of the, that was like one of the first things that you mentioned about having a heart led business can you dive a little bit deeper into that in terms of how that comes into play?
• 4:10
  Tom Jackobs: Cause that, that to me is like very heady and I think that's cool because there needs to be that balance between the head and the heart.
• 4:18
  Clarissa Burt: I think as leaders, we always have to remember that we are leading, with, we're not, we can't step away from the fact that we're in a role where we are leaders and whereas we're all about our heart and we're all about serving we cannot ever again, veer away from the fact that we are leading a team.
• 4:32
  Clarissa Burt: Or our company is leading a charge so we, as leaders, we have to be able to critical think our way through that and as I said before, that comes down to listening it comes down to explaining and listening to explanations, keeping ourselves flexible around whatever it is we're doing in certain analyses or the research that we do, the evaluations that will come through, but also keeping it fair.
• 4:55
  Clarissa Burt: In other words, getting all the information that we need to impact the bottom line while we're keeping ourselves open and viable to change, to fluctuation and being fair about it all, being flexible about it as well it's a very fine line, so it's a great question that you came back and asked that as well.
• 5:14
  Clarissa Burt: But remembering that heartfelt, heart led is still, you're still in a business and there still is a bottom line that you will be accountable for as a heart led leader.
• 5:25
  Tom Jackobs: And if you're not accountable to that bottom line, then you're not going to be a leader for very long.
• 5:29
  Clarissa Burt: Exactly, exactly.
• 5:30
  Clarissa Burt: So I think, we all go in and by the way, we all go in with the best intentions, we go in with, our lovely hearts and we want to do as much as we can for the greater good that's the four part, one of the four parts of my self esteem regime is, look good, feel good, be good.
• 5:46
  Clarissa Burt: And then of course the greater good and the greater good is giving back, volunteering, paying it forward, tithing, all the things that we can do but people also, I also have to come at that with a bit of a caveat people say, gosh, in these times, Clarissa, it doesn't always mean money.
• 6:00
  Clarissa Burt: Tom, it doesn't always mean big, broad stroke gestures, sometimes it's a smile, a compliment, and holding a door, an elevator door open for someone, getting up for someone in public transportation that might need that seat, a little bit more than you do so again, just, being able to still always have forefront and foremind doing the right thing.
• 6:20
  Clarissa Burt: If you can be a heartfelt leader that wants to be a better leader tomorrow than they are today, that means that you are constantly critically thinking you're constantly working on yourself there's that self improvement piece that we as leaders must always keep paramount and, that's self improvement, personal development piece that I've been in for a long time.
• 6:39
  Clarissa Burt: My company does this as well wanting to be able always to do the right thing, but keeping our, again, keeping our eye on the bottom line, it's very important.
• 6:48
  Tom Jackobs: Okay, cool.
• 6:48
  Tom Jackobs: Yeah.
• 6:49
  Tom Jackobs: That's great.
• 6:49
  Tom Jackobs: Great explanation.
• 6:50
  Tom Jackobs: Thank you for that.
• 6:51
  Tom Jackobs: And tell us a little bit about your business and what inspired you to start a heart led business?
• 6:55
  Clarissa Burt: Yeah, I`ve been in media for a very long time so I know how media can really help people become experts, leaders, some celebrities in their field so that they too can then go on and reach a broader audience, reach a greater good, and have that expert status.
• 7:09
  Clarissa Burt: That helps people, helps the individual have that credibility factor with whom they might work are with their clients and so that's a really important part of it all in the book, especially, I guess I said, it's look good, feel good, be good and greater good I think that all great leaders, whether they are in a heartfelt business or not, always have their eye on what it, on a platform, on a cause, on something that they highly believe in.
• 7:34
  Clarissa Burt: And it sometimes and most frequently starts with their why for example, my why is abused women and children this is where I navigate, it's where I have helped other organizations bring their, for, certainly in a pro bono way, because that's my way of giving back, getting them into the media as much as I possibly could.
• 7:53
  Clarissa Burt: Especially during COVID, I was working with an organization called domesticshelters.org that happens to be headquartered here in Phoenix, where I live, and there are shelters about last I counted, there were about 3,500 shelters all over the United States for women and children to yeah, it's a, it's huge.
• 8:08
  Clarissa Burt: So just this one organization and they bring together, they're almost an aggregator of information for women and children to be able to find in a quick way, or maybe, sort to create the plan to exit and believe me it's a beautiful thing there they've set up Amazon for every shelter.
• 8:27
  Clarissa Burt: So people can go in and say, I want to, donate to that shelter and you go to their Amazon page and you see they need diapers and they need, clothing or shoes, whatever it is they may need you can go and donate to that shelter, to that person, which is a beautiful thing they also put out a phenomenal, newsletter every month, which keeps everyone in the loop about, all the new things coming up and coming along.
• 8:45
  Clarissa Burt: So I've dedicated, especially during COVID, Tom, because during COVID we had our, the abusers were at home with the abusees, with the abused and that became really a pivotal and critical moment for women to be able to get out quickly and find a way to shelter.
• 9:01
  Clarissa Burt: So that was my, as I say, find your, that one thing if it's not, cause you're not broad stroke, again, a lot of these people that I've worked with do have a platform it could be the animals shelters, it's all over thank goodness, there are so many heart leaders out there, Tom, there really are, I think these are times that we take a look around and go, wow, we're so divided and everybody's so angry and what's going on.
• 9:22
  Clarissa Burt: But there are so many good people still out there so we must never lose faith.
• 9:26
  Tom Jackobs: That's great.
• 9:27
  Tom Jackobs: And what's the shelter name again?
• 9:29
  Tom Jackobs: So we can include that in the show notes.
• 9:30
  Clarissa Burt: domesticshelters.org
• 9:32
  Tom Jackobs: We'll link that up into the show notes.
• 9:34
  Tom Jackobs: So if people want to.
• 9:35
  Clarissa Burt: Thank you.
• 9:36
  Tom Jackobs: It`s a beautiful.
• 9:37
  Clarissa Burt: Yeah.
• 9:37
  Tom Jackobs: Shelters across America.
• 9:39
  Tom Jackobs: That means there's a big problem.
• 9:41
  Clarissa Burt: There's a huge problem.
• 9:42
  Clarissa Burt: It's every day and it's obviously it's, it's 99 percent women, not only so there are some men as well that, but rarely and it's a huge problem and it's a problem that continues to grow and get worse by the day because the more angry society is, the more angry men are.
• 9:58
  Clarissa Burt: And here's another thing that I will tell you as we're talking last year our attorney general here in the United States name, his name is Vivek Murthy, came out and said that we have a youth mental health crisis.
• 10:07
  Clarissa Burt: And that means that our youth, basically 50% of our youth from middle school, high school and college age are either depressed, anxious, they are thinking of committing suicide or have committed suicide.
• 10:19
  Clarissa Burt: That's an extraordinarily high number.
• 10:21
  Clarissa Burt: Let's take our veterans we say that we hear that our veterans are the famous 22 a day number, right?
• 10:27
  Clarissa Burt: Or the infamous 22 a day number we hear about that frequently as well, but what we, the biggest growing group right now are men.
• 10:34
  Clarissa Burt: And so they are, they're buckling and they're breaking under the pressure of the economy, the pressure of, all of the bashing, all the things I won't even go down I don't want to go down too far, the rabbit hole, but to bring the light the fact that we have so many men.
• 10:47
  Clarissa Burt: Now I will show you that the cover of my book is blue and when I it's three triangles it's my working copy, obviously yeah, when I first got this, the cover back, it was three iterations of it was pink, yellow, and orange, so it was really beautiful it's very feminine and it, my book is in Barnes Noble.
• 11:03
  Clarissa Burt: It's been there for the last two and a half years and so it would have jumped off the shelves, the only thing I have a New York City publisher and the only thing that I had asked for Tom, and you're not allowed to do this would you please consider making those three triangles blue, just so that men might pick it up?
• 11:16
  Clarissa Burt: Because, self esteem goes really wide and very deep, and it doesn't discriminate it's not just, don't compare yourself to others it is so much more than that and as I was doing my research and the work on myself, I took a deeper dive into different things so as a heartfelt and as a heart led business, I needed to put my money where my mouth was.
• 11:36
  Clarissa Burt: So as I was writing the book, it's all about self esteem, all the things in there and again, it's a manual you're going to do the work you're not going to read about self esteem you're going to do self esteem so I'm really thrilled about that but I found out also as I was doing the research on myself, I picked up a book called Asper Girls.
• 11:51
  Clarissa Burt: Found her on YouTube lovely girl, Rudy Simone, and I bought the book and I'll be darned, Tom, if I didn't go down her list and just go check and, whereas I would assume, and I, there's a spectrum so I, I'm not a scientist and I'm not a doctor.
• 12:04
  Clarissa Burt: But I will say that there's a spectrum, that we all navigate on somewhere along the line and where as you may look at me, talk to me and whatever else, being in a friendship with me, or you would never really think that I could have checked as many boxes as I did.
• 12:17
  Clarissa Burt: So that was an eye opening moment, Tom, because it was a moment in my life where I was able to understand how I was wired, why I was wired that way, and forgive myself for many things another book, real quick, Dr.
• 12:30
  Clarissa Burt: Elaine Aron, PhD, Extrasensitive People or Extrasensitive Persons or People.
• 12:35
  Clarissa Burt: There's a documentary on Netflix, the whole thing it's about 30 percent of the world, is, has, suffers with this disease and it's really nothing more than the way we are triggered by the things of overwhelm for example, bright light, believe it or not, I've lived my whole life in front of bright lights.
• 12:52
  Clarissa Burt: And my company is called In the Limelight but, we can't go overboard with too many bright lights smells, you can't cook in my house.
• 12:58
  Clarissa Burt: I can't stand the smells, I can't stand the smells, sounds if I'm in any city and an ambulance goes by, the police goes by, I've got to cover up because I can't stand the overwhelm of it hurts it physically hurts so with that, all of the things, and with that having been said, just a couple of examples to tell you that so many times in my lifetime along the way, I had heard, Oh, you're such a pain in the ass.
• 13:20
  Clarissa Burt: Oh my God, you're so difficult.
• 13:21
  Clarissa Burt: And that every time I heard that it was another hammer, it was another hammer on the nail it was a hammer on the head, it made me crouch a little bit to think that I know how great my heart is, but why is it that sometimes I can't externate, I can't communicate who I really am.
• 13:36
  Clarissa Burt: So I will tell you also and then I promise I'll be quiet and you can, but I get very passionate about these things during COVID the last three years of my life have probably been some of the most difficult I've had other times that were certainly difficult, but I lost my brother to cancer, I lost my sister at my brother's funeral.
• 13:52
  Clarissa Burt: I won't go down, but my best friend was my sister, I lost my entire Google drive, my mother was in a devastating car accident I had to have hysterectomy where they took out an eight pound tumor I could be here all day with the list believe me when I did the betrayals.
• 14:06
  Clarissa Burt: And so each one of them was absolutely, I'm going to say devastating, but it was like, here we go again, pick yourself back up, put your big girl britches back on and while I was, at times crawled into a fetal position and sobbed for weeks, if not months, I knew that every once in a while, a couple of times a week, I had to get up.
• 14:25
  Clarissa Burt: Put on those big girl britches, put on my makeup, do my hair and get in front of another podcast that would have me talk about my book.
• 14:32
  Clarissa Burt: And my book became really and truly not only a cathartic process, but definitely got me through some of the darkest times of my life.
• 14:42
  Tom Jackobs: And that's from the author standpoint as well I can imagine what that does for the readers of your book as well.
• 14:48
  Clarissa Burt: My book dropped on 21st of November, I think it was.
• 14:51
  Clarissa Burt: By the 23rd, I was in bed with COVID.
• 14:54
  Clarissa Burt: And I was two weeks with high fever twice to the hospital, I won't bore you, but then we got into real, it was like Christmas, then it was, New Year's.
• 15:01
  Clarissa Burt: So I really wasn't able to jump on the bestseller thing, at Amazon because I was sick.
• 15:07
  Clarissa Burt: And so my book really didn't start to see love until about two and a half months after it dropped.
• 15:11
  Clarissa Burt: I've done 250 podcasts since then, but yeah.
• 15:14
  Tom Jackobs: That's and what a great testament to actually doing the work that you prescribe in your book get up and just do what you need to do while you're still going through that, what you're going through and reeling from all the devastation.
• 15:27
  Clarissa Burt: And let me tell you also for people that are solopreneurs and people that live alone, you're always in your own head you are always in your own head and, you might have a quick call with your mom or, she's 84 and you can't bring her to, so, you really, and this is where I say the courage to do the work, no matter how bad it feels, no matter how difficult it seems.
• 15:47
  Clarissa Burt: There are, there's no excuse anymore, there are books, there are classes, there are courses, there are documentaries, there's meetup groups there's all kinds of things that you can do to help yourself along the way of your personal development journey.
• 16:00
  Tom Jackobs: Yeah, totally.
• 16:01
  Tom Jackobs: I, nothing that quite that devastating happened to me, like all of that together but like when I sold my business in 2018, that business, that fitness business was such an identity of mine that I lost my identity when I sold it and I was just really lost for, six months.
• 16:17
  Tom Jackobs: And I remember my business coach and we would talk like every other week, and she was like, Tom, just up every day and do the five things that you have to do every day and that's it just if you don't feel passionate about it, don't worry just do those five things but doing that over and over again, then the business started like the clarity started to happen and everything started to come back around and it was amazing.
• 16:37
  Clarissa Burt: And I think we also have to learn, it was amazing I think we also have to learn in this entire process, especially as heart led leaders to again, give ourselves the grace and certainly the stuff, the permission to step back sometimes if it's an hour, if it's a day, if it's even, a couple of days a week, step back, get out in nature, get into the sunshine, take that walk, read the books, do a chapter in a personal development book every day, write journal, write down your thoughts.
• 17:03
  Clarissa Burt: And then in the book, I got the, one of the exercises in the book from Louise Hayes and then Jack Canfield had it in one of his works so it was good enough for them, it was good enough for my book and it was the mirror therapy, which sounds weird, looks weird, feels weird, is weird.
• 17:17
  Clarissa Burt: It's all the things but when you can do be your own, when you start to be your own rah session in front of a mirror, because there are two ways to approach a mirror.
• 17:24
  Clarissa Burt: One is to look at the mirror and one is to look into the mirror so we're the preening or we're screening, right?
• 17:30
  Clarissa Burt: One is when we're getting ready and doing our beard while you do the beard and I do make up, we're preening, right?
• 17:35
  Clarissa Burt: We're getting ready and we're not really spending the time, we're just getting ready.
• 17:39
  Clarissa Burt: We go back to preening, which is where we're really taking, we're looking into the mirror, not looking at it, we're looking into it and that's where we take, we really lock eyes and when you can do that and some people can't, some people have a more difficult time with it.
• 17:52
  Clarissa Burt: So I tell them just start with bite size, start with 30 seconds, start with, hi, how are you today?
• 17:57
  Clarissa Burt: Clarissa good to see you! Here we go, another day.
• 18:00
  Clarissa Burt: See you later.
• 18:00
  Clarissa Burt: Off you go.
• 18:01
  Clarissa Burt: Or you can go, Hey, Clarissa.
• 18:03
  Clarissa Burt: Good morning.
• 18:04
  Clarissa Burt: Good to see you.
• 18:04
  Clarissa Burt: I'm so thrilled for you today because you've got another two or three podcasts.
• 18:08
  Clarissa Burt: That means the book is doing well and the message is getting out to the people that really need, that really need the help.
• 18:13
  Clarissa Burt: Want to let you know how proud I was of you the other day, that presentation you did in front of 300 people act it out of the ballpark.
• 18:18
  Clarissa Burt: Good on you and I want to also let you know that I really, not only do I like you a lot, I love you too.
• 18:22
  Clarissa Burt: I really love you, I love the person that you are and I love the way you just got past those three years that almost decimated you, desecrated you, you did an amazing job kid, keep up the good work, see you later.
• 18:33
  Tom Jackobs: What great self talk.
• 18:35
  Clarissa Burt: Yeah,
• 18:37
  Tom Jackobs: Brilliant.
• 18:37
  Tom Jackobs: Yeah.
• 18:38
  Clarissa Burt: But Tom, isn't that the crux of all personal development, self improvement, self esteem, and therein becoming a better heart led leader it's the self talk, those daily demons and we don't deal with them anymore they're in the past, right?
• 18:53
  Clarissa Burt: So getting up every day and say, this is what I, this is what the issue is.
• 18:57
  Clarissa Burt: This is what the problem is this is how we're going to solve it, and this is how we're going to help people, this is how we're not only going to help all of us, each one of us here at this table, but how can we help people?
• 19:05
  Clarissa Burt: Everyone else, and yeah, self talk is 98 percent of the game.
• 19:09
  Tom Jackobs: Yeah, absolutely, let's shift gears just a little bit if we've been touching around the topic of making profit in a heart led business and how important that is but yet a lot of heart led business leaders struggle with the whole aspect of making a profit or having that relationship with money so what type of advice might you give to some other heart led business leaders?
• 19:32
  Clarissa Burt: I think in my estimation, it should always be a percentage of the bottom line, you I say pre stabilized it's not the correct word it's you side ahead of time it's like that 10 percent tithing, if you go to a certain church, they expect 10 percent and that 10 percent is something that you know that you've worked into the, into your books.
• 19:48
  Clarissa Burt: You just know that's going out I think that it's on you as a heartfelt leader, as a heart led leader to understand what kind of numbers you might be doing and what percentage you really feel comfortable giving out and comfortable in the sense that, nobody's expecting you to go be doing first class, round trip travel and buying a new yacht with a Lamborghini in the garage.
• 20:05
  Clarissa Burt: I don't think anyone is expecting to see you do that when you're in HeartLed, you understand that you will take pretty much what is needed, and then I think that it's okay to also reward yourself with things, make a list of the things and again, they're not, they're probably not the things I've mentioned before, but there are things like, you know what, I'm going to buy myself that new dress.
• 20:26
  Clarissa Burt: I'm going to buy myself, I've been looking at that suit and that's the one I think I'm going to work real hard, make the numbers that I, when I make the numbers that I have projected, I'm going, I'm not only will I be certainly, I'm taking, a salary but I think it's going to be okay if I can give to myself, maybe you do that twice a year.
• 20:41
  Clarissa Burt: There are two things a year that you project because you, that also, leaders also have to stay motivated, don't they?
• 20:47
  Clarissa Burt: They are not, we are not perfect beings and I think that's where the empathy part also comes in, right?
• 20:52
  Clarissa Burt: We understand we have to be empathetic toward ourselves as well.
• 20:54
  Clarissa Burt: But, also that, that self care pieces, I think that rewards are, the kinds of things that it's to me and in my estimation and if you ask me, I think it's just fine.
• 21:05
  Clarissa Burt: Yeah,
• 21:06
  Tom Jackobs: And I like that aspect that you laid out as well, that it's part of self care, but also having that relationship with money to make sure that you have enough to take care of yourself and you're giving the value to your at the same time.
• 21:18
  Clarissa Burt: Absolutely, what are we in it for?
• 21:20
  Clarissa Burt: We're in it for the satisfaction of knowing that, we can be in a position to lead we're in it for the satisfaction of knowing that we are leading and helping people and, I think one of the things that leaders teach as well is reward yourself.
• 21:32
  Clarissa Burt: I will reward you, it's reward, a lot of times things are reward based and when I was a kid, you got a trophy when you deserved it you didn't get a trophy just because it showed up.
• 21:41
  Clarissa Burt: When I was a kid a long time ago I think that, it's a motivator, isn't it?
• 21:46
  Clarissa Burt: It's a motivator and it keeps one inspired to again, to want to do the right thing, to want to work harder, to want to, get the reward I remember when I was a kid in the fifth grade, I think it was, we used to have the Parker Pen Spelling Bee.
• 21:59
  Tom Jackobs: Yes.
• 22:00
  Clarissa Burt: And I'll be darned, remember the Parker Pen Spelling Bee?
• 22:02
  Tom Jackobs: Was my graduation present too.
• 22:04
  Tom Jackobs: I think a Parker Pen set.
• 22:05
  Clarissa Burt: Parker Pens, yes! And I won the Parker Pen because I was a great speller now I wasn't so good in math class and certainly when we got to algebra and trig, I was a disaster but I was good, very good in English and extremely good in spelling, really good in spelling so I would win the, and I really wanted to win that pen.
• 22:22
  Clarissa Burt: So again, it kept me motivated it kept me inspired and to do the work in school that would lead me to be able to understand how to break down some of those words that, all the things, you know, I before E, except after C, and all the rules that, English is tough too, by the way, if you have to, try to explain it to a foreigner, it's not easy.
• 22:39
  Tom Jackobs: Not easy at all.
• 22:40
  Tom Jackobs: That's awesome and I like that the whole concept as, as well, like you can't lead with your heart if you're struggling in other aspects of your life and money being one of those biggest struggles for a lot of business owners and you can't help other people.
• 22:55
  Clarissa Burt: Even during struggles, when you, as a heart led leader, keep in its proper place, beating, healthfully and warm and even when you're going through struggles, as I said before, you may not be able to do the broad stroke donations and do what is expected of you at church or all the things, right?
• 23:14
  Clarissa Burt: But you can definitely go out and leave you can leave, I think they call'em Easter eggs or, Easter eggs, or you leave little tokens around, right?
• 23:22
  Clarissa Burt: You leave the smile, you leave the compliment I've, I'm constantly going into supermarket, so I love that top that looks so great on you.
• 23:30
  Clarissa Burt: I've never seen her before in my life I'll never see her again but it's just that, it's that instant where I feel really good about saying something nice.
• 23:36
  Clarissa Burt: And she feels really good about getting the compliment win-win, ding ding.
• 23:39
  Clarissa Burt: It's not that hard.
• 23:40
  Tom Jackobs: Where that person is in that day and what that could mean to them as well it's those rants.
• 23:45
  Clarissa Burt: It's exactly right.
• 23:46
  Clarissa Burt: Here's the other thing that doing the work that I do, and have done, especially in the last years of my life, it's made me more tolerant, it's made me kinder, it's made me more flexible and certainly more patient so I, with that whole, walk a mile in someone else's shoes thing takes on a whole new meaning for me now.
• 24:06
  Clarissa Burt: So when somebody is cranky or they're weird or they're not necessarily, or they've, dropped the ball or they are honoree or whatever, all those things.
• 24:15
  Clarissa Burt: I take it with a G.
• 24:16
  Clarissa Burt: I wonder what kind of day they are having I wonder what they're going through a lot of people don't, they cannot express and speak frequently and fluently to what is bothering them.
• 24:25
  Clarissa Burt: They bottle it up and hold it in and so I'm not saying we all have to be psychiatrists and psychologists, but we can just add, just there's that little ripple throw a little of the little stone in the lake, another ripple, just the littler things that we might be able to do of course, if you can do bigger things, great.
• 24:40
  Clarissa Burt: But I am definitely now as a heart led leader, more tolerant than I've ever been and it's a beautiful thing, it's a beautiful thing it's what do you mean?
• 24:47
  Clarissa Burt: You're, what do you mean you're cutting in front of me?
• 24:49
  Clarissa Burt: No, it's go ahead please no, please I insist you want to hear that?
• 24:52
  Clarissa Burt: You're in a hurry.
• 24:53
  Clarissa Burt: Go.
• 24:53
  Clarissa Burt: No.
• 24:55
  Clarissa Burt: So yeah, just, I really, if I could, as a 20 year old could hear myself today, cause I came out of a very angry household where things were done with violence and raised voices.
• 25:07
  Clarissa Burt: And it's a beautiful thing to know that, again, we have, we all have that choice and decision to make right in life, Tom, and you probably made it yourself you can go left, you can go right, you can go, I'm going to be a victim my entire life, or I'm going to be a victor, and in order to be a victor, I need to do the work.
• 25:23
  Clarissa Burt: And I did the work with the self help section and the bookstores that we used to have back in the day, Walden books, Board of Books and Barnes and Noble and there were 40 or 50 books on those shelves no more and so those were the Books that got me through, I got my guidance, my assistance my support all the things that, I wasn't being taught elsewhere.
• 25:41
  Clarissa Burt: And by the way, back in my day, we didn't talk about these things it really wasn't a thing yet.
• 25:45
  Clarissa Burt: Now, when you walk into Barnes and Noble, the only bookstore that's left in the States, and happily to say my book is on those shelves in the personal development section, it is rows upon rows upon rows of personal development, and it's a billion dollar industry.
• 25:58
  Tom Jackobs: Crazy.
• 25:59
  Tom Jackobs: Yeah, that shows that there's an issue obviously in the world.
• 26:02
  Clarissa Burt: Yeah, just by default.
• 26:04
  Clarissa Burt: The other thing I want to tell you, and I love this one too, a couple of different things real quick, and that is, we're always talking about the Joneses and how the grass is greener on the other side I have two things that I say to that, and that is, grass is always greener where you water it, so come home and water your own grass and forget about the Joneses.
• 26:18
  Clarissa Burt: And the other thing is it really grass, Tom, or is it astroturf?
• 26:21
  Clarissa Burt: Is it real or is it plastic?
• 26:23
  Clarissa Burt: Is it perception or is it reality?
• 26:26
  Clarissa Burt: That's really important too I said nugget to leave with your audience and the last thing I'll say, cause I know we're over time, sorry I'm a talker they told me when I was a kid that I was vaccinated with a phonograph needle.
• 26:36
  Clarissa Burt: So I just vaccinated with a photograph needle I think they and if you don't know what a phonograph is, everybody, just go look it up and stop making me feel so old the other thing I will say is that as I started, I was doing the work on the book I was, I am enough, you are enough, we are enough, everybody's enough, ah enough and you know what?
• 26:52
  Clarissa Burt: Let me look up the definition of enough and by definition, enough is only as much as is required so just by definition, the word enough isn't enough.
• 27:03
  Tom Jackobs: Isn't right?
• 27:03
  Clarissa Burt: So here's the new mantra that I'll leave everybody with, Tom, because I think it's really important instead of saying, I am enough, It is now I am so much more than enough.
• 27:12
  Tom Jackobs: Oh, I love that.
• 27:13
  Tom Jackobs: Yeah, that's going to be my self talk in the mirror definitely tomorrow or even before I go to bed today.
• 27:18
  Tom Jackobs: So how can people learn more about you and get in touch if they want to work with you?
• 27:23
  Clarissa Burt: I'm inviting everybody over to dinner tomorrow night.
• 27:25
  Clarissa Burt: No, I'm kidding.
• 27:26
  Tom Jackobs: You're not cooking though, because it smells right.
• 27:28
  Clarissa Burt: I'll cook out back I have a barbecue, clarissaburt.
• 27:30
  Clarissa Burt: com and I'm basically, everywhere the book is on Amazon it's in Barnes and Noble store it's on Kindle Audible and ClarissaBurt on all social, except for Snapchat.
• 27:39
  Tom Jackobs: Is anybody using Snapchat these days?
• 27:41
  Tom Jackobs: Anyway, I think it's still there.
• 27:42
  Clarissa Burt: I guess it's not, it's just not a thing in my world.
• 27:44
  Tom Jackobs: Awesome thank you so much for coming on the show and sharing your wisdom and your words of advice as well I really appreciate you taking the time.
• 27:52
  Clarissa Burt: Thanks so much.
• 27:53
  Clarissa Burt: And by the way, thank you for staying up until midnight for me I know you're in Taiwan and it's midnight there thank you.
• 27:59
  Tom Jackobs: That's part of life, you we do what we need to do.
• 28:01
  Clarissa Burt: Thank you.
• 28:02
  Clarissa Burt: Yes, we do.
• 28:03
  Tom Jackobs: And to our show listeners and watchers, thank you again for tuning in for today's episode with Clarissa.
• 28:09
  Tom Jackobs: I really appreciate it I know she really appreciates it as well make sure you're checking out the show notes down below and checking out everything that Clarissa is doing we'll link all of that up into the show notes, so make sure you are checking that out and if you could do us a really solid favor and share the show with somebody else that you might know that could use the advice that was shared today, I know I would appreciate it and Clarissa would definitely appreciate it as well so until next time, lead with your heart.
• 28:35
  Speaker: You've been listening to the Heart Led Business Show, hosted by Tom Jackobs.
• 28:40
  Speaker: Join us next time for another inspiring journey into the heart of business.