Latest / Financial Survival Network / Overcoming Fear: Tackling Failure, Public Speaking, & Digital Communications - Ron Koenigsberg #6055
Transcript
- 0:00You know, what is it about positive thinking that makes you twenty nine percent
- 0:04modern according to the FBI? You know what are and greeding the being in
- 0:10the applet how common the asm can overcome fear? You know, we talk
- 0:15about cold calling and we talked about some of those fears and art of my
- 0:20every day as the commercial real estate broker still is at age fifty nine thirty
- 0:26years doing this is to pick up the phone and speak to people I don't
- 0:29know but recently bought, to stole the property, and to discuss with them
- 0:33strategies for what's next for them. You're listening to Carrie. Let'sa's Financial Survival
- 0:38Network where you get valuable information you just can't find anywhere else to thrive in
- 0:44today's trying times. You need the Financial Survival Network now more than ever.
- 0:50Go to Financial Survivalnetwork dot com and get your free newsletter and gift. Financial
- 0:56Survival Network now more than ever, And welcome you are listening to and watching
- 1:04the Financial Survival Network. I'm your host, Carrie Lutz. Well, you
- 1:08know we love real estate on this show. Some of my best friends are
- 1:12in real estate. Hopefully they'll be in there for a while, but who
- 1:17knows. With what's going on today, interest rates and rising inventories. In
- 1:22certain parts of the country like Florida, empty office buildings because people no longer
- 1:29go to the office, or if they do, they do hybrid three days
- 1:33or two days at the office two three days at home. So what do
- 1:36we need these buildings for. Well, let's hear from a New York power
- 1:38broker, Ron Koenigsberg. In fact, Ron, you have written a book,
- 1:44Howard Broker, How to Succeed in Life and Business. Why do I
- 1:48have a feeling that the book is about more than just being a realtor.
- 1:53That's correct, Carrie, that's correct. Thanks for having it's all much on
- 1:57your show. I've listened to a lot of epithelic and it's a pleasure to
- 2:00be here. And I just had written power Broke I had to be the
- 2:05testful and business in life. I think it's for anyone listening. I'm a
- 2:09career stales person. I'm a career commercial real estate broker. And while I
- 2:15definitely want to talk to you about commercial real estate, and more importantly,
- 2:19I want to talk to you about the you know, the skills for communication
- 2:23and the ability acceptful And while only one in nine of us identify it as
- 2:29a career of salve person. I can promise you the other eight of us
- 2:34one hundred percent abuts are in thallsand thumber Guard every single day of all.
- 2:39I couldn't agree with you more. I've been doing sales since my late teens.
- 2:45I was once upon a time selling newspaper subscriptions for the Star Ledger in
- 2:53the New Jersey. And really, I wouldn't say they had a good training
- 2:58program by any stretch, which is kind of lousy honestly, But hey,
- 3:04you knew that ninety percent of the people were going to hang up the phone
- 3:07on you. Nowadays though, you can't even reach those people to get them
- 3:13to hang up the phone. I mean, hey, it's like you welcome
- 3:15you look back to the days when people actually hung up the phone on you
- 3:21with with nostalgia here you know, absolutely, what if I told you that
- 3:27they're in the statistic that eighty five percent a law American business leader and millionaire
- 3:34and entrepreneur eighty five percent started in Dell. Wow, I totally do it
- 3:43well. Every business you're always selling something. You know, your greatest product
- 3:47or your worst product, depending from your perspective, is you. You're always
- 3:53selling yourself here around right, You're the solution, You're the answer to whatever
- 3:59it is they need. What starts there, and that's correct. And I
- 4:02believe that the skills that would talk about in Kyle Broker how to be successful
- 4:08in business in life are the fields that help people amass so much money so
- 4:15that you know, they can invest money to the financial survival network thing.
- 4:19They can talk about gold and silver and stock. All right, So what's
- 4:26the key here? What's the secret? How do you break the code?
- 4:29The millionaires could become a millionaire multimillionaire? There must be a way, right
- 4:32of course, of course, of course, And I think the book that
- 4:38really resonates with Nieing two thousand and five, Key harp Effert wrote a book
- 4:44specifically about the quality that the eight skills, and I've written nine skills that
- 4:51make up the millionaire mind. And you know, his skills are outlined in
- 4:57in my book. But the first thing I'll to talk about is active listening.
- 5:02Well, you know, and that's the reason why I wrote this book.
- 5:06While the successful salesman and I've been up a million dollar producer for many
- 5:13years, and I do I have been the commercial little day brokely the year
- 5:17here on Long Island. It really wasn't until about ten years ago that my
- 5:21brother was an attorney, said to me, I want to change your entire
- 5:26world. I want to teach you how to be an active listener. It's
- 5:30a skill set that I need you to work on and exclusive listener. And
- 5:36I said, wait a minute, you don't have to you don't have to
- 5:40listen in their ear they're tasking ahead and said, now put away your distraction.
- 5:46I want you to practice listening. I want you to repeat back to
- 5:49me when I'm telling wolf. And I started to do that for thirty days
- 5:54and myself really went a percentage wide. And then I started to think about,
- 6:00you know, what is it What are the tools that the South parks
- 6:05and has or getting five doubtful people? You know, what is it about
- 6:11positive thinking that makes you twenty nine percent modern according to the FBI? You
- 6:16know what are and greeding the being in the appset? How common doing the
- 6:23ASM can overcome fear? You know, we talk about cold call and we
- 6:27talked about some of those fear. And part of my every day as the
- 6:31commercial real estate broker still is at age fifty nine thirty years doing this is
- 6:36to pick up the phone and pick the people I don't know or recently bought,
- 6:41to stol the property and to discuss with them strategies for what's next for
- 6:45them in commercial real estate hanged. So overcoming fear, fear of failure,
- 6:53fear of success very important, isn't it. Yeah, Yeah, fear of
- 6:59failure in something that I think that and I think our parents, our grandparents,
- 7:04they loved us and they try to do the very best, but in
- 7:08many ways they implant it in a needs fear that they have, the fear
- 7:14of value, the fear of death very much. Oh, you know,
- 7:18the fear of If we really want to talk about fear it I did.
- 7:23One of the most amazing fears that I came abrook while writing their book Second
- 7:28to None, honestly, is glass of phobia. What is it? Lots
- 7:33of phobia, Perry. It's amazing. It's the fear of public speaking.
- 7:41Okay, Now, public speaking to me is a leadership build because you can
- 7:46speak in front of a group and you can speak well, and you can
- 7:50speak in front of an audience, and you can speak in front of a
- 7:54one on one audience and be able to speak well. Then it lens to
- 8:00the death. But let's talk about class the phobia. It's the fear of
- 8:05being ridiculed or exiled. Now we all meet each other. There's the fear
- 8:11of public speaking, which has been in people, according to the sciences phobia
- 8:16the thousands of years. And the theory is that you're going to say something
- 8:22and it's going to be so silly and so embarrassing that you're going to be
- 8:26ridiculed and xtyled from your group. That's hard dying into us. Now.
- 8:33I don't know anybody that's been ridiculed or extyle. However, I do know
- 8:37a lot of people, including myself, that have suffered from the fear of
- 8:41public speaking. And it's a practice mechanism. Now, the more you practice
- 8:46there, the easier it is to overcome that fear. But it's practiced,
- 8:50and there are is the fear of public speaking, and it is hardwired.
- 8:54You know. So funny, I've never had that fear. I just was
- 9:01born to talk in front of groups. Love Now, I will admit,
- 9:05when I first started the podcast, I had a fear of exactly what you're
- 9:09saying and saying something stupid. But then it occurred to me while I'm recording
- 9:13the podcast, so but I don't look good. I can always edit it
- 9:16out. But you know, but I've certainly known my share of people who've
- 9:22had that fear. I mean, I even went up and I started doing
- 9:26stand up comedy recently. While you are peel it. If I would peel
- 9:31it, Carrie, I would do stand up comedy. I would love to
- 9:35try the I'm scared. Yeah, but there's like the first time I got
- 9:41up. I was a little nervous the first couple of times. But when
- 9:43people start laughing at your stuff, it gives you confidence. And I love
- 9:48that. You know the old saying you got to fake it till you make
- 9:52it. You got to produce confidence even if you don't feel it right,
- 9:56and that is key to sales as confidence, it's key to any thing in
- 10:00a future. Dating success is confidence because nobody wants to be with somebody who's
- 10:05a loser, you know, they only want to be with winners. Tell
- 10:09me more about the public, I mean, tell me more about the comedy.
- 10:13Did you enjoy it? I loved it. I still am doing it,
- 10:16and I know I'm good enough that I could actually go get paid for
- 10:20it. But it's like I don't want to be a headliner. I'm going
- 10:24to do corporate events, and I call myself America's top recovering attorney. Oh,
- 10:31I didn't realize that left the world law. Hey, the world's a
- 10:37stage, right, Shakespeare said the world's a stage, and world just actors
- 10:41upon it. Everybody's yeah, I would love to try public peeping. So
- 10:50really, I think, you know, I think what interests me is watching
- 10:52I have two sons, well fifty nine, I had a ten and an
- 10:58eleven year old, and I think I'm blown away about the amount of tech
- 11:05mathage. How many text messages do you think new stand the day? Too
- 11:09many? I mainly spend my time deleting text messages from people I don't want
- 11:16to hear from, but they have a political bent, but they send me
- 11:20fifty of them a day. But you know, I just get like these
- 11:24text chains. My kids do it. I've got three kids, and it's
- 11:28like I've muted all the notifications, so just they just accumulate and then I
- 11:33look what you say, then fifty two tech per day? Then reallyfy two
- 11:41texts per day. However, that significantly changes once you appear in the age
- 11:48twenty five right to one hundred and twenty eight at math and gen it gets
- 11:54worse with age what we do. Let we actually I think it's better.
- 12:01I think its inverted. I think that we're better at communicating. I think
- 12:05that the guilt that are getting worse. You know, one hundred and twenty
- 12:11seventy eight percent of Americans say that they would rather with that they could text
- 12:18a company rather than pick up a bone and get information about that. I
- 12:24feel that way too, because texting is what you call asynchronous communications, meaning
- 12:31you don't need to be looking at me and me looking at you, or
- 12:33on the phone. You know, I can just send you something that I
- 12:37want to know and I don't have to, you know, wait around for
- 12:43you to come up with an answer, So it's more efficient. But we've
- 12:48we're way past that though. It's a use well right, so it's becoming
- 12:52a problem. I'm just wondering in that not having to you know, being
- 12:58forward base and is a statistic that blows me away. Seventy six percent of
- 13:05gen D, which is fourteen to thirty four year old. I think George
- 13:09gen v report tremendous phone and then should they have to speak to somebody?
- 13:18Oh that's funny. How Wow, that's you know. So I think that
- 13:26my book and my message and my and my guilt that it's focused on really
- 13:33those eighty five percent of the carn African Northern business leader that have been able
- 13:37to learn how to sell. And I think it's really understanding communication and the
- 13:43formula behind communication that I don't know if you know the FBI thirty fifty five
- 13:50to thirty eight seven. Basically, communication is broken down at the fifty five
- 13:56percent body language and facial expression five percent, thirty eight percent through tonality.
- 14:05I hate something only seward. Yeah, well so me and my ex wife
- 14:13had that beat because one hundred percent of our communication was nonverbal. We just
- 14:20like stopped talking to each other altogether. So yeah, I am in the
- 14:26same boat. I have an ex wife and bought you I am able to
- 14:30beat the Harvard get to the two uh because of these two children. We
- 14:35get to the two children. It's important to me and I think I've learned
- 14:39a lot a writing that's about to bring me to something that you know,
- 14:43a company is really hard for me, and that's the ex wife and I
- 14:46am. It's argument I've taken anger out of my ordin that's not true.
- 14:54Are tried. I tried. So getting back to the important things here,
- 15:01the fears, the things that keep you from success. Besides speaking in front
- 15:05of a group, which is really mandatory and taught my kids how to do
- 15:11it from a long time before. What else have you got what other fears?
- 15:18Well, public speaking is one, this communication, the genic fear of
- 15:26being on the phone. I think it's understanding them and challenging yourself and understanding
- 15:31that life is living outside the comfort zone and that need to transfer your you
- 15:39know, but also learning the Dell Guild and use that a little bit earlier.
- 15:46They're transferable. So if you can tell and you can speak to people,
- 15:50those they build, I think you set are immunitable on a date with
- 15:56you know. He So another thing that I used to overcome my remaining fears.
- 16:03I know that started this seven years ago. We've only got a couple
- 16:07of years between us age wise. Learning how to dance, because if you
- 16:11want to learn how to dance, you have to you absolutely have to learn
- 16:18how to not care what anybody thinks looking at you. You have to lose
- 16:23all your revenue self comed for you. It works. I recommend that you
- 16:30dance and look kind of dance and basically ballroom dance, whoa and ballroom you
- 16:40know, different Latin dances and such. It really all I mean, I
- 16:47don't even know I could get to put my self out there like that.
- 16:51It's just talking. I'm just so powerfully all a lot. You would be
- 16:55surprised, you'd be Have you ever seen a laye? So I felt,
- 17:00Yeah, I have friends that dance like that, and I can one of
- 17:04them. But everybody can learn to dance. The key is not to learn
- 17:11how to do a particular dance or whatever, but just to learn to learn
- 17:15how to enjoy whatever it is you're doing is really the key. That's how
- 17:22I feel about seal, But that's how I feel about you know, speaking
- 17:25to my son and speaking to anyone. Number one is to impress upon them
- 17:32the important of being able to public speak, communicate, negotiate, relationship,
- 17:37build, understand when we're brilliant. Now what we're brilliant is in business.
- 17:45I would want reporting. I did write a book and I would ask what's
- 17:48the most important guilt to accepting business? And I believe it to be,
- 17:53you know, obviously deep guilt. But one of the skills that I've included
- 17:57in my nine guilt is we're villion. You will be tested, you will
- 18:03have challenge to reach your goal, and Dolan, there will be a lot
- 18:10of resistance. And I need people to understand Brazilians isn't important not only in
- 18:15thousand business and all of all part line? All right, well, I
- 18:18think we covered a lot here. I think if you want to find out
- 18:22more, then just going to have to go and get the book. It's
- 18:26at Amazon or wherever fine books used to be sold. The name of the
- 18:30book is Powerbroker, how to Succeed in Life and Business. And there's a
- 18:37special Kindle deal there. And hey, the author, of course is Ron
- 18:42Koenigsberg. Ron been a pleasure, haven't you just tell me? Thanks so
- 18:45much? Where do we find you? How do we connect with you on
- 18:48the web? Absolutely www, Ronconnisberg dot com. I have a landing page,
- 18:56we have a Kijabi video to learn. But yeah, definitely Rolcoburg dot
- 19:04com. All right, links in the show notes to this interview on our
- 19:08site Financial Survival Network dot com. And while you're there, please sign up
- 19:14for your free newsletter rot BET A pleasure. Thanks so much for stopping by.
- 19:18Thanks so much, Kret, thanks for having me Wow, thank you,
- 19:22thanks for listening to carry Letz's Financial Survival Network, your solution to today's
- 19:26trying times. For the latest, go to Financial Survivalnetwork dot com. Financial
- 19:33Survival Network now more than ever,