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Building Resilient Teams and Leadership Insights with Erin Kruger · Authentic Living

• 0:01
  Welcome to Authentic Living with Roxanne, a place where we have conscious conversations
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  about things that really matter in our lives.
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  And now here's your host, Roxanne Durhaj.
• 0:40
  Hi, everyone.
• 0:40
  It's Roxanne Durhoch.
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  Thanks for tuning in again to Authentic Living with Roxanne.
• 0:45
  Today, have a special guest, Erin Kruger, and she's bringing expertise in leadership, but
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  from a different angle to my past guests.
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  So Erin is in real estate.
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  So Erin, thanks so much for coming on today.
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  Thank you so much for having me, Roxanne.
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  I really appreciate it.
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  So I'm gonna tell you a little bit about Erin, but it's not gonna do it any justice, in that
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  you can read all about the amazing things she's done.
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  But she's Erin's a nationally recognized leader in real estate.
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  And I was saying to Erin way back when right out of my undergrad, I went back in into real
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  estate.
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  It didn't last very long.
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  And she works you know, she's ranked number 14 in the nation, which I think is a pretty
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  impressive thing.
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  And she's, you know, done things like manage teams.
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  She's over $2,000,000,000 in transactions.
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  Like, how amazing is that?
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  And net nearly 225,000,000 in sales in 2024.
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  Pretty, pretty impressive numbers.
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  And just so excited to talk to you about leadership because I know when you're starting
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  off as a solopreneur in real estate, it's one thing, but you've gone on and expanded onto
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  teams.
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  Just curious to talk a lot about that.
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  And, of course, she's written a book, which we need to check try to delve into as much as
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  possible about capture the culture.
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  Erin, so tell me, did you grow up wanting to be in real estate?
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  Did you come from a real estate background and family or community?
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  No, actually I grew up with a farm family.
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  I'm from Penn, a small town right outside of Philadelphia and we had an Angus cattle farm.
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  So I learned what hard work is early on.
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  But I was, my pathway was in advertising and marketing.
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  And I never thought that I would be going into real estate, but that's how life is, right?
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  It kind of brings you kind of some twists and turns.
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  And one day I worked for a boss, a leader that I would say is probably the very opposite of
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  myself.
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  And he was the type of person where he would take a completely calm company and he would
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  turn it upside down with just walking into a room and leave in total chaos and cause a lot
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  of stress and things like that.
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  And it just wasn't the type of culture that I wanted to be part of.
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  And one day he asked me to plagiarize a customer, a competitor's commercial.
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  And I was writing the commercials at the time.
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  And I said, no, I can do something better.
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  And I was in my young 20s and he says, no, I'm going to give you your holiday bonus early.
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  You're going to do it.
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  And I said, actually, I'm not going to do it.
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  You're going have my resignation by the end of the day.
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  Because at the end of the day, you only have your name.
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  And so I walked down the hallway and he said to me, Aaron, what are you going to go do?
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  And I said, I'm going go into real estate.
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  And he left.
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  And six years later, I ran into him and he says, Aaron, I'm seeing your signs everywhere.
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  I feel like I'm responsible for this.
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  And I said, oh, you are.
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  Great seeing you.
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  And I walked away.
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  At that point, I was number one in Tennessee as a solo agent and 14 in the country.
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  And I took that success as an independent agent to growing a team because I had to out of
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  necessity.
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  And I needed good people who did things in a similar fashion of, you know, processes and
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  systems that I do things so we could be better and be able to really facilitate all the
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  clientele that I was being able to bring on and service them.
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  It's been a I've worked for, you know, prior to being in real estate, I worked and did a whole
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  bunch of corporate different entities from ad agencies to working for small businesses,
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  negotiating deals with Nickelodeon, Marvel, all of those things.
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  And I learned a lot.
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  The most important thing that I think I learned was not what not to do as a leader.
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  I think it's just as important as what to do as a leader.
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  And so when I started to build my own team, I realized, number one, I I didn't have a
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  pathway.
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  I didn't have a methodology.
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  And I if I needed to have any kind of semblance of success and order and staying power, I
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  really needed to get some things together and really figure out where I wanted to be as a
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  team leader and an entrepreneur.
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  And most importantly, the people who entrust me and come on my team, where do they want to be?
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  So I can ultimately help them reach their goals to be their best self.
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  Because if they become their best self, they are happier, they stay, they're loyal, they
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  love what they do, they love the people they're working with, and their performance is 10x a
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  team that may be the same size that doesn't have a great culture.
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  And so that's what I focus on in Capture the Culture.
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  So obviously this leader, he was instrumental in starting your path of understanding what
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  leadership should not be.
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  So what was some of the core fundamental things that you learned about leading relatively
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  early?
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  I I would say in real estate, you have to be a self starter.
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  But what did you learn about you?
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  Because it's kinda hard when you're just starting off and, yes, you have business
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  contacts to clear you're coming from corporate, but you still have to build that that, I'm
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  gonna say, the book of business where people kinda now can shift over from seeing you in a
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  different environment to real estate.
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  So what kind of things did you rely on to start, you know, selling real estate and
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  relying on those skills?
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  Well, I mean, I think, you know, to start building a business, I moved to Nashville, and
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  I did not know one person.
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  So, I essentially had two corporate positions in Nashville within probably two years of being
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  in Nashville.
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  And I didn't really have a big book of business, right, when I decided to make this
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  huge leap into real estate.
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  But I believed in myself and I always was I was never, you know, a stranger to hard work.
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  And so I ended up paying for leads so I could, you know, get my basically cut my teeth, if you
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  will, on converting.
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  And I think that's a very powerful skill if you're able to convert, whether you're in the
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  grocery store line and you hear somebody talking about real estate or if they're on the
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  phone or they come into an open house, whatever it is.
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  So I ended up doing that and I had a lot of success.
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  And I made those clients that I converted into lifelong clients.
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  I called them my water closet, like water cooler ninjas.
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  You know, they hear somebody in their office that is looking to buy or sell and they
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  immediately say, I don't know who you're currently working with but you need to work
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  with Erin.
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  Let me get her on the phone and connect you right now.
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  And so I ended up having these amazing clients that were fighting for me every day to bring
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  more clients my way.
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  And what I realized early on working with all of these corporate structures and seeing things
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  how I didn't want to build a team or have a culture, I realized really quickly that people
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  don't leave businesses.
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  They leave cultures.
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  And I think that if people understand that, they would put more accountability into
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  themselves as leaders, but they would put more emphasis on the heartbeat of their team.
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  I think there's so many managers that are out there that have no idea what's going on in
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  their business.
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  They look at the bottom line and they see that things look pretty good.
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  And they don't know what's going on with their team members.
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  And it could be the complete opposite of what that manager, CEO, or team lead is thinking.
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  And unless you have a pulse on your team and you know what's going on with them, you know
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  what their why is, you're never gonna be able to reach the full potential of the company.
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  It's so interesting because in my work, I talk about core essentials.
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  So there's five core essential areas, and of which connection is one of them.
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  Right?
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  And, you know, we talk a little bit about in in real estate, there's pressure, like we're
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  talking about the market and things like that.
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  But you have to stay in value alignment when you're in an you have to know the person and
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  know their like, to your point, their why.
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  So what if, like, one when you're building your team, and let's say, you know, you've got a
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  good compilation, but some one person's kinda they're kinda going in opposite direction based
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  on what they had shared with you when you hired them.
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  Well, how do you kind of approach that person to kind of I'm gonna use the word motivate or
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  incentivize them to tap into what you know they have?
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  Absolutely.
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  I think the first thing I start with is that, you know, to be on my team and my business, we
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  get inquiries all the time to join our team.
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  And we're very selective of who we bring on the team.
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  And we have a really big rigorous hiring process, which I can talk about later.
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  But, you know, for me to hire somebody on the team, I truly believe in them.
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  I truly believe in them.
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  At the end of the day, somebody can have all the potential in the world.
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  But if they don't put the work behind it, all it is is potential, right?
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  And so for me, I think it's about belief of a team member.
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  So if I see somebody kind of going off the rails, maybe kind of having a little bit of an
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  attitude problem, maybe their work is suffering, maybe they're not being able to do
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  what they're doing, maybe they're kind of being a rotten apple and their negativity is maybe
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  starting to affect other team members.
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  Right?
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  I will sit down with them and I will come from a place of empathy.
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  And I will say to them, I believe in you.
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  I chose you.
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  What's going on?
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  Talk to me.
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  And I want them to be very vulnerable because I feel as though I'm a vulnerable leader too.
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  I really want to know what's going on with them.
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  Because if I know what's going on with them, we can create a pathway to fix them and get them
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  on the right path.
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  If they choose to be vulnerable at that point and open up to me about what is really the real
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  reason behind it, we're gonna craft a thirty to forty five day plan to get them back on the
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  right track.
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  Right?
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  It's gonna hold them accountable.
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  It's gonna be written down, and it's gonna be a pathway to get there.
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  It's up to them if they're going to take the steps to do it.
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  Okay?
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  If they choose the latter approach, is not being very vulnerable, not opening up about it,
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  kind of still having that negativity or that closed mindedness of it, then I simply say, you
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  know, I think you're a wonderful person.
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  Yeah.
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  I
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  don't think this is the team for you.
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  Unfortunately, we're going to have to go our separate ways.
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  And so I give everybody the opportunity.
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  But if they don't take the opportunity for change, then I have no other ability than to
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  let them go.
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  And a lot of so I have part of my team is admin staff, W-two employees.
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  The other half are ten ninety nine contractors, right?
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  And so you have to be very careful on how you approach those conversations.
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  But I truly believe if you come to them with empathy and understanding, at the end of the
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  day, I'm not going to let somebody's negativity affect the work and the mindset of other people
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  that are headed in the right direction, that are positive, that believe that tomorrow is
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  going to be a better day if today's a little sticky, right?
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  I want people that have a really good need to be better tomorrow than they are today in my
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  business.
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  And if they're not following kind of that kind of pathway that we've all committed to on the
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  front end, then this is just not the place for them.
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  So, you know, you talked about some core fundamental things, right, which is fitting in
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  feeling like you belong, being vulnerable.
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  These are all things that I think often oftentimes in leadership, it's kinda like, you
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  know, if I'm too vulnerable, then am I gonna create the space of accountability?
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  So tell share with us how you in that situation, I often say it's not soft skills at
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  all.
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  It's actually pretty tough, tough skills that you have to go through.
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  How do you support someone but still keep them accountable along with that plan that you're
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  talking about?
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  How do you do have a path that you kind of do you do check ins?
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  Do you do certain things?
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  Do you suggest coaching?
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  What kinds of things do you do with your staff?
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  Yeah.
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  So we are, as a team, we are committed, we always say this, we're committed to being
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  better tomorrow than we are today.
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  If I set somebody up on a PIP, which is the thirty to forty five day performance
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  improvement plan, there are going to be action items that they have to count, that they have
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  to hit in order to still stay on the team.
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  And it is very clearly outlined.
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  And everyone says on my team, you always know where you stand with me.
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  There's no gray area.
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  You're going to know it's black or white with me.
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  And I feel as though if I give you the opportunity and we spend time and we create
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  this pathway, if you're not hitting those benchmarks, I'm going to have a very direct
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  conversation, right?
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  And at the end of the day, my job is to be a coach and to coach them up and to make sure
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  that they're doing it.
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  But they have to want it.
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  If you don't want it, I can't want it for you.
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  And I think as leaders, as managers, we have to realize when the other person doesn't want it
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  anymore, Okay?
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  And that's when you have to cut ties.
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  There are times when I put somebody on a PIP and I think we've had a really good
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  conversation, we've done this pathway, and two and a half weeks in, I'm not seeing any
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  improvement.
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  Okay?
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  And you need to know when to to walk away.
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  Right?
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  You need to know when to cut the ties.
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  And it's okay to cut it early and to say, you know what?
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  We were on this plan, but I haven't seen any improvement.
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  And that's not what you committed.
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  And unfortunately, I think we're just not the team for you right now.
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  And that's a again, another hard thing that a lot of managers to have those hard
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  conversations.
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  Right?
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  And to sometimes come to the, you know, the reality that some people just aren't a right
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  fit for whatever reason.
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  And maybe they didn't have the I would say most people can get through a a forty five minute
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  interview or whatever being able to keep it all together and tell you what, read the room,
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  those types of things.
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  But within that, like, you know, whether it's ninety days or whatever that you're have them
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  on probation, what starts to happen is if the person's intention is not in alignment with
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  what the values are of your company, then it surely slowly starts to kinda show its cracks.
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  And then you're gonna support them.
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  Like you said, you put them on a performance evaluation plan, and they're still showing it
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  to you.
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  At that point, you have to have those tough conversations.
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  And I can tell you in health and wellness strategy when I was an executive and we would
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  manage a lot, you know, East Of North throughout Canada and The US as well and into
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  Europe.
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  That was the biggest concern that we found with managers.
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  And what they would do is they wouldn't go to their HR and I don't know if you have a
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  consulting firm that you have internally or if you consult with another firm.
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  So what would happen is we would oftentimes feel these calls, There were managers that
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  could kinda hide, and they didn't know how to have those conversations.
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  But maybe they'd been there, say, sometimes thirty years.
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  And they didn't wanna go internally to say their directors or whoever because they were
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  afraid that they would be viewed as incompetent because they'd kinda shift around to be able to
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  manage without having to have those tough conversations.
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  So the fact that you're saying that you have those relatively early is pretty amazing.
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  Now if there's leaders listening and they're saying, well, you know, Erin, we're successful
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  ish, and our tube is working okay.
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  I know there's a little bit of let's use the word nepotism or a little bit of favoritism,
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  and maybe we haven't dealt with everything ideally on our teams.
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  And what kind of a guidance would you give that leader around thinking through a strategy to
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  optimize the potential on that team?
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  So first of all, I think that jealousy, nepotism, some negativity that could be on the
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  team can be fixed with community.
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  And what I mean by that is being able to pull the teams together and do different events and
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  different things.
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  And whether it's lunches or dinners or drinks or happy hour or in my team, we do all of
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  those.
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  I have an all female team.
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  And so we'll do maybe like a spa day or we'll do something where every if we hit our goals at
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  the end of the year, I will take them away on a trip.
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  And, you know, I learned a long time ago that appreciation matters so much.
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  Not everybody's love language, so to speak, at work is money.
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  You have to know as their manager, what is Is it a conversation to say, I don't know how you
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  do what you do, but you just knocked it out of the park.
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  That moment can be so meaningful to that person if you know that that's what that person needs.
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  But if you're not paying attention to the people around you and what their motivation
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  factor is, their love language on how they feel that they're appreciated, you are going to miss
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  the boat.
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  And so I remember many years ago, about twelve years ago, it was the first time I had a team
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  and it was the holidays and I wanted to do something special.
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  We had definitely hit our goals.
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  And I wanted nobody around me, especially in real estate, had taken their real estate team
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  on a trip.
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  But I wanted to do something.
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  I wanted to take them all to Tulum on an all expense paid trip.
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  Absolutely.
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  Nice.
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  And I remember taking them into the conference room, and I put a little bag in front of each
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  one of them.
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  And inside was a monogrammed leather passport.
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  And when you opened up the passport, it basically had a little printout of an all
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  expense paid trip to Tulum, had the dates.
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  And I, as a team lead, I was expecting that when I said, thank you so much for working so
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  hard, I want to tell you how much I appreciate you.
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  And I think it's time for us to have fun together and really get to know each other on a
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  completely different level.
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  And please open up your gifts.
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  And they opened it up, and they looked at the they saw the fact that they're going to Tulum.
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  And I expected as a team leader, a little bit of dancing, a little bit of, like, high fives,
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  people screaming.
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  And what I saw when I looked around the table were tears.
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  Nobody had taken the time to appreciate them like that.
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  They were speechless, absolutely speechless.
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  And what I learned on this trip is that it was the best money that any team lead manager could
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  have spent because husbands weren't a part of the equation.
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  It was a girl's trip.
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  We were down there.
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  We were bonding on a different level.
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  We understood people.
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  Everybody's so different.
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  I mean, I have people that are 23 to 62 on my team.
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  And everybody's a different personality.
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  But if you understand where somebody is, you're gonna have an appreciation of where they are.
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  And being a good manager is about even the fact of when you're doing your seats on the
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  airplane, making sure that people that maybe aren't the besties in the workplace are sitting
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  next to each other so they can get an understanding of the person next to each other.
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  And I think that is the mind of somebody who is not just a great manager, but a great person
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  that can bring teams together and lift them up.
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  And I think that when you do that with your team, I'll tell you what, my team members come
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  back from that trip and they are ready to go.
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  They are loyal.
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  They are recharged.
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  They are ready to sell real estate.
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  They are ready to serve their clients, and they're very positive and thankful.
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  And I think that people take time to appreciate their teams.
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  And it doesn't have to be grand gestures like a trip like I can do.
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  A lot of people can't do that with economic things.
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  But take somebody out to dinner, go and do, you know, an escape game or do something or maybe
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  even have a contest at work or something that gets community going.
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  Community, when people feel a part of something, they and if they're a part of
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  something great, they don't wanna leave it.
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  Absolutely.
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  Because everybody wants to be seen.
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  Everyone wants to be seen.
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  Right?
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  Everybody wants to feel that specialness.
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  And likewise, I've ran several teams in my career as well in corporate, and it was
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  something silly.
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  Mine is simple compared to yours.
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  So I ran a team, and they had some, I'm gonna say, less than desirable leadership two two
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  iterations before me in a row.
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  And then there was me, and I was a newer grad just kind of, you know but I thought, well, I'm
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  a good person.
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  I can lead.
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  I'm just gonna show them that trust is all those things, and they were not very happy.
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  But what it took was just trying to I remember walking into offices and being inadvertently,
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  not not directly, but what are you doing here?
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  What what do you want?
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  And and then I would say, I'm I'm just trying to get to figure out who you are and what
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  you're all about and how you work.
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  And I would say probably for about two years straight of running this team of 15, it was a
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  constant pushback.
• 21:25
  And I think the second Christmas, I did was it was an outpatient clinic.
• 21:30
  It was something so simple, not like your Tulum.
• 21:33
  Something really simple with the colors of your unit and it was red.
• 21:38
  I put red on it and I put their names and I put outpatient clinic.
• 21:43
  I think it must have cost me like, to your point, doesn't have to be money, like $10 a
• 21:47
  shirt or something to get it embroidered with their name.
• 21:51
  Was, it was like a shift, like a massive pathing of the sea because all of a sudden they
• 21:57
  felt connected, they felt validated.
• 21:59
  We went out to a beautiful dinner together and they had all their they were talking to each
• 22:05
  other.
• 22:05
  Ones that would not have talked or barely talked to each other.
• 22:09
  I was like, wow.
• 22:11
  This can't, I mean, mind you, taking a bit of work.
• 22:13
  But to your point though, that sense that you are you are the you truly are the glue as the
• 22:19
  manager.
• 22:20
  And, you know, when I talk a lot about my ROR process, I talk about the importance about who
• 22:27
  you are and you living in in alignment so that you're making decisions the same.
• 22:34
  And I know, you know, sometimes when leaders get stressed, they sometimes make decisions
• 22:40
  that maybe go off a bit a bit of a path, but to really kinda stay connected to themselves so
• 22:46
  the true essence of who you who Erin is is coming out regardless if where you're stressed
• 22:51
  or if a child is sick or if so, you're going through something, which puts you under a lot
• 22:55
  more pressure, but the value of that is, you know, tenfold.
• 22:59
  You know?
• 23:00
  Absolutely.
• 23:01
  I couldn't agree more.
• 23:02
  I think people are seeking appreciation.
• 23:05
  They're seeking understanding.
• 23:07
  And I think that if you can really understand who your team is and what they want, man,
• 23:15
  they'll work so hard for you.
• 23:16
  The results will just flourish.
• 23:18
  If somebody isn't in town because they've got a death in the family and another team member
• 23:23
  needs to pick up the slack, They're there.
• 23:25
  No questions asked.
• 23:26
  And that is a true definition of a team.
• 23:29
  And so we're and that's what you want to do is stop this whole individual.
• 23:33
  Everyone's on their own island doing their own thing and thinking as a well oiled team for the
• 23:39
  common vision of the company and the end results of what the goals are.
• 23:44
  I think that also starts with the fact that you have to bring them in.
• 23:47
  You have to take the veil off and you have to say these are what our goals are as a company.
• 23:52
  This is what I need from each one of you.
• 23:54
  I have and then I sit down with each of my team members and I go over goals because I need to
• 23:58
  know where their goals are to be able to push them to be able to like get the best out of
• 24:01
  them.
• 24:02
  I have people that have started with me where their goals were so low, I look back now, and I
• 24:08
  actually keep them on record.
• 24:10
  So ten years before I can pull it up, and I can say, do you remember when your goal was $50,000
• 24:17
  a year and now you're making $500,000?
• 24:21
  Way to go.
• 24:23
  Way to change your life.
• 24:24
  I'm so proud you.
• 24:25
  I'm so proud of you.
• 24:27
  And those are the conversations that you have, but you have to take moments because they will
• 24:33
  realize it.
• 24:34
  They will recognize it.
• 24:35
  And they will be loyal and they will stay there.
• 24:37
  But don't be surprised when the confidence is so is built up because that's what you do.
• 24:42
  You empower.
• 24:43
  You give confidence.
• 24:44
  And eventually, their wings might fly.
• 24:47
  And that's okay.
• 24:48
  Right.
• 24:48
  And not to and really to take it personally because you've invested and you've co created
• 24:53
  the space that person has realized and created success.
• 24:57
  So don't be upset.
• 24:59
  Recognize that people come for different reasons.
• 25:02
  And if you've helped create that success, wish them well.
• 25:05
  And because pasts often circle back in some way.
• 25:09
  Now, Erin, tell us a bit about the book.
• 25:11
  What made you wanna write the book?
• 25:13
  And what would people we've had an amazing conversation already so far about how you think
• 25:18
  and how you run things within yourself as a leader, but and also your teams.
• 25:22
  But what kinds of things will people learn in the book when they buy it?
• 25:26
  Capture the culture.
• 25:28
  I was never meant to be an author.
• 25:30
  I never thought about writing a book.
• 25:31
  I was doing a pretty large speaking engagement and a publisher was in the room and approached
• 25:37
  me about writing a book and telling my story.
• 25:39
  This is half business book and half my background to tell people about difficult days
• 25:45
  don't define you, what you do with them does.
• 25:47
  It's about resiliency, and we spoke about that earlier today before we hopped on.
• 25:51
  I, at 21 years old, had lost my parents in a car accident.
• 25:56
  Oh my goodness.
• 25:57
  Eldest.
• 25:57
  There was a lot in my story, but what that tragedy taught me was to be grateful of the
• 26:04
  twenty one years that I had with the most amazing immigrants.
• 26:07
  There's a lot of people that don't have that.
• 26:09
  And I was being very thankful for them to making my sister and I both independent women.
• 26:14
  We miss them every single day, but we carry them with us through those moments.
• 26:21
  And I remember that moment going back to when my boss asked me to plagiarize a competitor's
• 26:25
  commercial.
• 26:26
  And I said no.
• 26:27
  I also felt two hands on my shoulder.
• 26:29
  And I know without a shadow of a doubt it was my parents saying that's my girl.
• 26:33
  And so there are moments that I learned through the tragedy of that.
• 26:37
  And one is when you're in the middle of the tragedy, no matter and everybody goes through
• 26:42
  it, death, divorce, sometime or other, you know, sometimes you just have to take a breath
• 26:48
  and just be in that moment.
• 26:50
  But don't live there forever.
• 26:52
  This is a chapter in the book of life.
• 26:56
  And you've got to turn the page.
• 26:58
  And what I always say is keep moving forward.
• 27:00
  Keep moving forward.
• 27:01
  It will get better.
• 27:03
  It will get better.
• 27:04
  And so a lot of those things that I learned early on, making decisions fairly fast,
• 27:11
  following my gut, being in a state of gratefulness, and having a positive outlook
• 27:17
  that better days are ahead, has really allowed me to be a good leader with my team.
• 27:24
  And I make mistakes.
• 27:25
  There's a chapter in that book that talks about all the mistakes that I've made along the way.
• 27:31
  But I am committed to being better.
• 27:35
  When I'm wrong, I'm the first person to say I'm wrong to a team member, and I'm so sorry.
• 27:41
  I know it's fascinating because we didn't talk about your background, you know, and myself as
• 27:47
  a psychologist.
• 27:48
  You know, resilience is what I talk about and the importance of awareness and just learning
• 27:54
  about yourself and spending time in that space and learning how to breathe and to recognize
• 28:00
  when someone's triggering you and all those things that all of us as human beings, it makes
• 28:05
  us better people.
• 28:06
  But ultimately, it makes you a better you understand what your path has been and what how
• 28:12
  it's helped define you and when you've faltered and those types of things.
• 28:16
  And ultimately, when you've done that awareness work, then you're able to kind of tap in to
• 28:22
  potentially some things that people may be showing you.
• 28:24
  It may not be the same parallel, but you could say, I've been through things, not the same
• 28:29
  things, but I'm here for you.
• 28:31
  And that's such powerful tool when you can open up that vulnerable space, but and then people
• 28:36
  really respect because then they go, wow.
• 28:38
  I didn't know Erin went through that.
• 28:40
  That's pretty amazing because oftentimes people see the end result that's on the stage like I
• 28:45
  speak and train, And then my background has been less than ideal, but ultimately that
• 28:50
  doesn't define, like you said, you.
• 28:51
  Unfortunately, losing parents so young are the things that I had experienced by the time I was
• 28:55
  that age as well.
• 28:57
  Now, I would like you to define what is success for Erin Kruger?
• 29:06
  What is success?
• 29:08
  You know, there is a quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson, and I talk about this in the book.
• 29:13
  It basically says, if you have changed one person's life, that is the definition of
• 29:19
  success.
• 29:20
  Yeah.
• 29:21
  And you know, when my dad had passed away, listening to all the people speak at the
• 29:26
  funeral, gosh, I was like, oh my gosh, how successful.
• 29:29
  He wasn't a corporate guy, he was a farmer.
• 29:31
  You know, to hear how he's changed so many people's lives was just so magical to me.
• 29:35
  And it made me have a different outlook on what success is.
• 29:40
  From the corporate stance, I've hit almost all my goals that I have set out.
• 29:45
  Now it's new goals, right?
• 29:46
  And so what gives me the biggest fulfillment as a boss, as a manager, is now seeing the 12
• 29:53
  women who work with me and for me every single day reach their goals.
• 29:58
  There have been women that have entered my door with $50 in their bank account, that now have
• 30:05
  investment properties and have are paying for their kids to go to school, you know, own
• 30:10
  homes.
• 30:11
  And that is very fulfilling to see women being their true potential that they never saw for
• 30:18
  themselves.
• 30:19
  But they got with a group that saw it and helped them get there with their hard work.
• 30:26
  And I think as a leader, that has shown me that the definition of success is so much greater
• 30:33
  than my own success because it's about other people.
• 30:36
  Absolutely amazing, amazing.
• 30:39
  So one last question.
• 30:41
  And this one, think I would have a sense of how you would answer.
• 30:45
  What would you tell your 20 year old self if you met for coffee?
• 30:49
  What would you tell her?
• 30:50
  Wow.
• 30:51
  So 20, 21 is when the accident happened.
• 30:54
  So I would say, I would say to my 20 year old self, it's going to be a bumpy road, but it's
• 31:03
  going to be a beautiful one at the end.
• 31:06
  And I think that's the biggest thing.
• 31:08
  It's gonna get better.
• 31:09
  It's gonna get better.
• 31:10
  Get a little emotional too,
• 31:12
  but Of course.
• 31:13
  This is a yes.
• 31:14
  This is amazing that you can share.
• 31:16
  And how many young people have been through so many things by that age.
• 31:21
  And, you know, and to be able to for you to be able to inspire them with your story, I I think
• 31:26
  it's a gift that you're giving them all there.
• 31:28
  Thank you.
• 31:28
  How how fortunate the people around you or the people that you might impact with this book or
• 31:34
  any stages that you go on to to tell to tell that story.
• 31:38
  So any last words?
• 31:39
  This has been really truly inspirational to hear what you've created.
• 31:44
  Any last words you wanna leave for leaders out there or for people that are just listening to
• 31:49
  your story?
• 31:49
  Any last words?
• 31:51
  You know, there's one saying on my team.
• 31:53
  We don't like any negative Nellies or negative Nathans, you know, that kind of bring down the
• 31:58
  momentum of the team.
• 31:59
  And sometimes we say to them, Some days are dirt, but most days are diamonds.
• 32:04
  And if we focus on that, our perspective changes.
• 32:08
  I love that.
• 32:09
  I've never heard that before.
• 32:10
  I love it.
• 32:11
  Love it.
• 32:11
  And that was something that you came up with?
• 32:14
  Actually, one of my team members, one many years ago came up and with her southern drawl
• 32:19
  she said some dyes are dirt and some dyes are diamonds.
• 32:22
  And I was like, yes, That is exactly the truth.
• 32:24
  So it's even better with the drawl.
• 32:27
  Exactly.
• 32:27
  Exactly.
• 32:28
  And so we just we have said that over and over again.
• 32:31
  And one year for Christmas, I ended up giving the girl some diamond bracelets because I said,
• 32:36
  never forget that you are strong, you are brilliant, and you are very precious to me.
• 32:42
  Well, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom today.
• 32:45
  It's been amazing.
• 32:46
  So what am I what am I taking away?
• 32:48
  I think that what I'm taking away is you are the gift of those you impact around you, and
• 32:56
  remember that always.
• 32:59
  And obviously, like Erin said, even if you will impact one person, that's more because there's
• 33:05
  generations associated with that person that you would have touched that person in so many
• 33:10
  ways.
• 33:11
  What I'd like to say is thank you again, Erin.
• 33:13
  And for everyone listening, my ROR course is running in September, and it's filling up
• 33:18
  quickly with life coaching.
• 33:20
  So if you're interested, please reach out to find out more and what's involved, but we
• 33:24
  started September.
• 33:25
  If you're interested, let me know.
• 33:27
  Go to Roxanne at roxannedurhodge.com.
• 33:30
  Again, Erin, thanks so much for your time.
• 33:32
  And for everybody, thanks for hanging out with us.
• 33:35
  If you love hearing podcasts and stories like Erin said are amazing, please subscribe to the
• 33:40
  podcast so it'll end up in your inbox and you'll know when it's coming out.
• 33:44
  Take care, everyone.
• 33:45
  Thanks again, and we'll talk to you soon.
• 33:48
  Bye bye.
• 33:55
  Thanks for tuning in to Authentic Living with Roxanne, creating the space for positive,
• 34:00
  healthy change.
• 34:01
  Roxanne is a keynote speaker, psychotherapist, and coach.
• 34:06
  To work with Roxanne, visit roxannederhaj.com/blueprint.
• 34:12
  We'll see you next time on Authentic Living with Roxanne.