Latest / Arguing Ever After / 26-New Year, New... Fight? Should Your Partner Push You In Your Wellness Goals?

Transcript

26-New Year, New... Fight? Should Your Partner Push You In Your Wellness Goals? · Arguing Ever After

0:14
Hi and welcome to Arguing Ever After.
0:17
I am Luke and this is my lovely wife Amber.
0:20
Hello. Together we are the Lord and
0:22
Lady who lock horns. The count and Countess of
0:25
contention. The Duke and Duchess of
0:27
Disagreement. And the king and queen of
0:28
quarrels. We have been together since the
0:32
Billy Blanks Taibo mania was hitting the fitness scene.
0:36
In this podcast, we bicker about all things bigger and small, and
0:39
we let the audience decide who the winner is.
0:43
Many of our topics are frequently submitted by our
0:45
listeners, so if you have something you want us to battle
0:48
over, please send it to us at arguingeverafter@gmail.com.
0:52
All right, here we are. I don't know exactly what
0:56
episode number this is going to be.
0:58
Neither do I. Because we are.
1:00
In the 20s. Pre recording this.
1:02
Yeah, we are. I think it's going to be. 25.
1:08
What if it's the pivotal 26? I think it's 25.
1:12
OK, math is hard. It is hard.
1:15
We have established this. I know we're just really jumping
1:18
the gun, but we had to on purpose, right?
1:22
Yeah, Luke is going to be maybe without a voice for I don't know
1:28
how long. I don't either.
1:30
Probably not that long. Right.
1:33
Or a sore throat or something. Yeah, I'm going to have some
1:37
sort of a, what's it called, tonsillectomy.
1:40
That's the let's see, I came up with a look at that with a
1:42
medical word that was correct. All right, well.
1:45
So I'm supposed to eat like soft foods and stuff, which of course
1:48
has me concerned that I won't be able to talk for, you know, 1/2
1:51
an hour, right? You're probably thrilled.
1:53
You know, I had thought maybe we could try anyhow and just have
1:59
me. Just a dry run quick.
2:01
Yeah, yeah, you know what? Maybe we will.
2:03
We'll have a bonus Amber episode where Luke just sits there and
2:06
has to listen. I like this idea.
2:11
Maybe you'll laugh every once. In awhile you know it could
2:14
could work. Be the 26th episode maybe.
2:17
I don't know, we'll see. I mean, people maybe don't.
2:20
Do you think they're really tuning in for you and me?
2:24
I hope so. Oh man, you're just chopping a
2:30
guy down. Oh, that would be probably a
2:33
really bad test to do a Luke recording and an Amber recording
2:38
and see who won. Battling solo podcasts.
2:43
All right. You're writing that down for.
2:44
Writing it down. Oh my goodness.
2:48
Wait, can we have it be where the other one's there?
2:51
But like has some sort of like like you duct tape your mouth or
2:56
something or like where you can't you just give dirty looks
2:59
to the other one. That could be, really.
3:02
Yeah. I don't know.
3:03
How would you stop? Finger wags just like this.
3:06
Yeah, yeah. And but it would really only, I
3:09
mean, it would only work for half the audience, those who are
3:13
viewing, you know, the other one would just be listening and
3:15
being like, I wonder if Luke's actually responding or if he
3:20
thinks it's great. I.
3:21
Would for sure be responding. You would.
3:24
You would. I think you could not actually
3:26
be silent if you had to be, for I feel like you can't talk for a
3:30
little bit. That would be real tough for me.
3:32
You couldn't do it and it because I would say something
3:34
you'd be like I can't. Just grumble.
3:37
Breaking my sutures. Grumble, grumble, grumble.
3:42
I would do that. Yeah, yeah.
3:45
But so that's that's why we're pre recording and I'm sure
3:48
everything's going to go great and I'm sure it'll be a really
3:51
quick turn around. But we know that we're going to
3:55
need a I'm not. You're going to want a week off.
3:59
That's probably true. And we're really only
4:03
accountable to ourselves. That's true.
4:05
We were to skip, but I don't really feel that way.
4:08
At the same time, I enjoy having something regular.
4:11
Yeah, also if things get weird or difficult and I really can't
4:15
talk for some reason for a semi extended period.
4:18
Of maybe I'll have a guest. Wow.
4:20
I was gonna say we do have a prerecorded episode that we
4:22
could air, but you just went right to kicking me out.
4:26
OK, cool. So that's how it's gonna be.
4:28
OK. Write it.
4:29
Prerecord on purpose or just kick Luke off the show arguing
4:36
ever after because you won. Oh gosh.
4:40
Yeah. Oh.
4:41
That's interesting. I know we have talked about.
4:44
Casting changed the name to Winning Ever After.
4:46
Not just one. With Amber one.
4:50
Amber won. Ever after I'm fine with.
4:53
That sounds like you're OK I'm. Fine with that, and honestly
4:57
it's kind of been a part of a long journey you've been on.
5:02
That's true. You're getting this surgery for
5:05
your own Wellness purposes. This is true because sleep apnea
5:09
is real. It is.
5:11
And I got it so bad people, most people don't think I have it
5:15
that bad. And then I tell them and anyone
5:17
that knows about sleep apnea is like, oh, that's really bad
5:22
because usually sleep apnea doesn't affect, you know,
5:26
younger people who are not, you know, like out of shape.
5:31
I mean, that's the the truth about the disorder disease.
5:34
I don't know what it's called classified as, but like when I
5:37
first was diagnosed with it in my early 20s, yeah, they said
5:42
that I had the sleep apnea of AI.
5:45
Don't. The statistics were something
5:47
like a 60 year old £300 man. And at the time I was like 21
5:53
and probably weighed 175 lbs or something, right.
5:57
And they were shocked at how bad it was.
5:59
Yeah. So they prescribed me one of
6:00
those little mask things which I tried and it worked, but long
6:04
term it didn't because like the fit of the thing ended up like
6:09
messing with my nose and I would get like bloody noses and bloody
6:14
gums and like it hurt my teeth and I would get headaches and it
6:19
was pretty terrible. And so I gave up on the thing
6:21
and there's now technologies available that are curative for
6:27
it that I hope to get. And this is surgery that gets me
6:32
one step closer to that. Yeah, Yeah.
6:34
Well. 20 years in. Well, I think though, only the
6:38
last year or two have you really been like consciously, Yeah,
6:42
following and I don't know what the driver was for that.
6:45
Part of it's you. Me.
6:48
Well, you know, the sleep apnea people often think that it's
6:51
just snoring and it's not, but it does.
6:55
They they do go ahead. If you have apnea, you snore
6:58
pretty much as a guarantee. But there's plenty of people,
7:01
I'd say most people snore, I think.
7:03
I mean maybe they don't but don't have sleep apnea.
7:08
Sure, I could see that. I could see that I snore when
7:11
I'm sick. That's true.
7:13
You have a cute snore though. Do I?
7:15
It's like a little, it's like a little, it's like high pitch and
7:20
it's short. It's like a little sniffle
7:22
snore. And I have like like a roaring
7:26
dragon snore. Yeah, yeah, it's super loud.
7:31
It's intense. It's super loud and our our
7:33
daughter has said. I'm surprised you've never
7:35
recorded it and been like this is what you do.
7:37
No, because there's, I mean, I don't want to.
7:40
I know what you don't like that you snore.
7:43
That's true. I don't like to highlight that
7:44
you snore. Well, I actually don't care
7:46
because I'm asleep, but I don't like that I don't sleep well
7:49
because of apnea. I don't like that I don't sleep
7:52
well because of your apnea. There we go.
7:54
As well. But I mean, I also, I mean I
7:57
grew up, there were snores in my family and like I said, I think
8:00
I could be wrong and not everybody's might snore, but I
8:03
snore if I'm sick. And I don't know why, but it
8:07
used to be kind of do people make fun of snoring?
8:10
Is that a thing kids did? I don't know.
8:12
Because I feel like it was not cool if you snored.
8:15
I have no idea. I don't know, maybe maybe I I
8:19
feel like it like sleepovers if anyone snored, you know, like
8:23
they'd get made fun of. I remember a girl who I This is
8:28
dumb. It has nothing to do with our
8:29
topic, but I was at a sleepover and there was a girl who talked
8:34
in her sleep and of. Course.
8:36
Yeah, I used to do that. I don't know if I still do.
8:38
Sometimes, yeah, but of course, you know, we would make fun of
8:42
her. I mean, she won't.
8:43
Sure. And the thing she said was I
8:45
love being a turtle, which was really big during the Ninja
8:48
Turtles. I don't, I can't remember her
8:53
name, but sorry because I know we said that to her all the
8:57
time. If she's listening, I'm sure
8:58
she's not. But I apologize for making fun
9:01
of you for that because you did not have control over the things
9:05
you said in your sleep. And it's true.
9:07
And that's funny. I don't know.
9:10
But anyhow. So here we are.
9:11
And when you all hear this, the math is hard, but I believe we
9:17
are in a new year. We should be when this airs.
9:20
2026. Holy moly.
9:22
Wow, look at that. Uh huh.
9:24
We've been podcasting all the way into the next year.
9:27
That's true. Who knew?
9:30
I sure didn't. I didn't either and who knows?
9:32
I mean like this is what, 3 weeks or something into the
9:36
future? I have no clue.
9:37
It's so fun when we record in the future.
9:39
I know because you get to think about all the things that could
9:41
happen, right? Like I mean.
9:43
Well, we will be through Christmas.
9:45
Did you see the ball drop? For sure.
9:48
Yeah. Also your birthday.
9:50
Yeah, and I'm, I know it was wonderful for sure.
9:53
I bet I got everything I wanted and did everything I wanted to
9:55
do. I hope so.
9:57
I turned another year of 27. Will you tell me what you
10:00
wanted? Cake.
10:03
I want cake. Oh my God I want cake.
10:05
I love. Cake.
10:06
Easy to do. Yeah.
10:08
And now that we're in a new year, I don't even need to think
10:10
about that anymore. But it's true.
10:12
But it all happened and it was great.
10:13
And you know what? We were thinking of you all the
10:16
whole time. It's true, right?
10:18
We do like doing this. We love doing this.
10:21
Yeah, I or at least I do. I don't know.
10:23
Fingers crossed we will have picked up some new States and or
10:26
countries. That's always fun, yeah.
10:28
Yeah. I mean, and I just, I think that
10:32
going into a new year with a new US, I mean, like last year this
10:36
time, I don't remember what I was thinking about.
10:39
I don't think I had anything special on the books for 2025.
10:42
I had no clue, no clue what the year would bring.
10:45
And now we went through a podcast and now again same
10:48
thing. No clue what the new year will
10:49
bring. Are you talking about like
10:50
you're trying to remember if you had a New Year's resolution?
10:53
I know I didn't. I don't do New Year's
10:54
resolution. I see.
10:56
I sort of kind of do. Do you really?
10:57
But not like what kind? I mean, yeah, I guess I kind of
11:01
do because I always reflect on the year gone by and think about
11:04
is there something I can do to better myself?
11:11
I remember like in elementary school, they would ask us what
11:15
our New Year's resolutions would be.
11:16
And I feel like one time there was something that I had and I
11:19
wasn't fully, I wasn't at all committed.
11:21
And I, I immediately like relapsed on whatever that thing
11:24
was. And I realized that this does
11:26
not work for. Someone.
11:27
Was it chocolate? I don't know, I feel like I
11:31
doubt that, but it was probably something really dumb.
11:34
Like I don't know, like I'll be a better student or I have no
11:37
idea. But it clearly didn't mean that
11:40
much because I don't remember what it was and I can promise
11:45
you I did not make it. Not.
11:48
Probably not. I think I did.
11:50
On your first New Year's resolution.
11:52
Yeah, well, I don't tend to make lots.
11:54
I think it was eat salad for lunch.
11:58
OK, wow, so this was two years ago.
12:01
No, I didn't start that two years ago.
12:03
OK, well, I mean. I think honest to goodness, I
12:06
think it was last year's New Year's resolution as part of my
12:09
goal to attempt to stay in shape.
12:11
So you've only done one New Year's resolution then?
12:13
Well, how many do you want me to do?
12:16
Well, you've been on Live for 27 plus years.
12:19
You want me to remember all of them?
12:21
I just, I can't do that. That's a lot of work.
12:24
I just the fact that I think I remember, I don't even know if I
12:27
do remember, but the fact that I think I remember last year's,
12:29
this is a pretty big accomplishment.
12:31
Yeah, yeah. I just don't first.
12:33
I do remember a couple more now that you say that.
12:36
One of them, this is a few years ago, was that I wanted to start
12:39
journaling in the morning. All right.
12:41
Which I started doing a few years ago and I haven't missed
12:43
more than maybe like one day every six months or something.
12:47
All right, I bet you in that journal I have whatever the heck
12:50
my actual New Year's resolution was for this year.
12:54
Oh, interesting. I could go check.
12:56
Yeah, I'd probably forget and not check, but I could.
13:00
Well, and I think it's interesting because like, it
13:03
clearly works for some people and it doesn't work for others,
13:06
right I. Have to make it small.
13:07
That's the like. It has to be like.
13:09
It can't go wild. Well, I would say journaling
13:12
every day is pretty big. Doing anything for a whole year,
13:18
OK, like I think that's pretty hard.
13:21
But it was OK. So I learned about, well, I
13:24
don't know if this I personally learned about this idea called
13:27
habit stacking from a book that I read called Atomic Habits.
13:34
And I already have like a morning meditation that I do.
13:38
So I added the journaling to that block of time.
13:41
So it wasn't like super difficult to achieve.
13:43
It was like, I'm going to add another 10 minutes onto my
13:47
existing. You know what I was already
13:49
doing. So it wasn't like creating a new
13:51
slice of my life. I was adding to an existing one,
13:54
which for me was like much easier.
13:56
Well, I guess for me, if I were to I, and I'm sure I'm alone in
14:05
this, I doubt it. But like if I say I'm going to
14:09
do something long term right, that becomes really unmanageable
14:14
for me and the second I don't do it then I'm like well I've
14:17
messed it all up and I can't start again.
14:19
I feel that. I feel that with working out cuz
14:22
that's one that I like, I'm constantly struggling with and
14:25
it's about time. Like it's not that I don't want
14:28
to do it, it's just time management is super difficult.
14:33
It is. I mean, I think well, that's
14:35
actually really good. So that is 1 of people's freak.
14:39
It's AI, think the number one New Year's resolution.
14:43
It's always something to do with weight.
14:44
It's like exercise. Yes, right.
14:46
Diet or exercise or whatever. One and years ago one of the
14:50
things I did was I was AI sold memberships at a gym and so of
14:56
course right at the first we're like, we got the fuckers, you
14:59
know yeah, cuz you're like, I know you're gonna maybe you
15:02
might might come in for up to a month, but you're not going to
15:06
be here long, but you'll keep paying because that guilt of
15:10
well, I said I was going to do it and I can't turn it off and I
15:13
don't want to go back in there because you know most of the
15:15
time like you have to come in and sign a paper you know of
15:18
course you know whatever if you work at a health facility and
15:22
you got to. Sign in or something?
15:23
You have to sign a physical paper back in the day.
15:26
I don't know if this is true anymore.
15:28
I feel like that might be a little bit of an entrance.
15:30
Like scan a wristband or something.
15:32
Well, so no, you probably can just unsubscribe or whatever
15:36
online, but back in the day, they purposefully made you come
15:39
in so that you'd have to like come in and like, say I want to
15:41
sign the paperwork. And then you talk to someone
15:43
like me who was a advisor and I'd be like, oh gosh, I remember
15:47
your goals back in January. You wanted to work out for.
15:51
A time with the guilt. Yeah.
15:53
Dang, that's wrong. But I didn't do it really well
15:56
and that's why I didn't stay in that field because I was not
15:58
very good at it, because I was like, you don't want to work
16:00
out, I'm not going to stop you. You were supposed to hit that
16:04
guilt button. Yeah, yeah.
16:06
You'd call them up like if they had told someone they were
16:09
thinking about leaving and the word got back.
16:11
So you're supposed to call them up and be like, but do you
16:14
remember that this was one of your goals?
16:16
And I just, it felt yucky. I didn't.
16:21
But I mean, when people were signing up, you would ask.
16:23
I mean, that being said, it's at least serving a good function.
16:27
I mean like, it's not like you're selling like a timeshare
16:31
no one's ever gonna go to. It's like cuz working out is
16:34
good for you so. Yeah, but we weren't really
16:36
caring if they came back. I understand that, but we.
16:38
Want them to end them? If you look at the bigger
16:40
picture of it, the obviously the sales tactics are to generate
16:45
revenue for the gym, but also in its essence, the gym exists as a
16:49
place for people to get and stay healthy.
16:52
So it's not like you were having them, like you're not calling
16:55
from the Chocolate Factory and selling them a bunch.
16:58
You know what I mean? Like you're it's.
16:59
Delicious and makes you feel good mentally of.
17:02
Course it is, but it doesn't like make you healthier or like
17:06
you're working at the, I don't know, There's all kinds of
17:10
things that I'm saying that you can sell that aren't an
17:13
inherently good thing, and then working out is inherently good.
17:16
There's not like a bad version of working out.
17:19
Actually, I would disagree with you wholeheartedly because being
17:22
someone who has done fitness a good portion of her life, yeah,
17:27
now, huh? A very good portion of like you
17:31
can be unhealthy in your pursuit of working out.
17:36
I have been unhealthy in my I. Feel like that makes sense.
17:39
Are you talking about your shoulder situation?
17:41
Oh no, that's one of them. No, but like out of nowhere, one
17:45
day I was like, I'm going to start running and I'm not a
17:47
runner. I've never been a.
17:48
Runner. I don't like running.
17:50
But we had gotten a free treadmill from someone who had
17:52
missed their New Year's resolution.
17:55
Yes. And I, I recall throw that bad
17:58
boy in our basement. Sure did.
17:59
And I did. And I started running out of
18:01
nowhere. And I have this personality that
18:04
I have to be the best, the fastest, the whatever.
18:07
I mean. So day one, we get it.
18:10
I turn it on, turn on the TV and I'm like, great.
18:13
I'm not a runner. I'm not a runner.
18:16
I'm gonna run for at least an hour.
18:19
And then I got to an hour and I was like, well, I see the
18:23
calories I'm burning. I'm at 600 calories.
18:25
If I keep going, maybe I can make it to 1000, you know?
18:29
So that's what I did. Like immediately.
18:31
There was no training, nothing like that.
18:33
But it was an obsession I had with numbers that it became
18:38
really unhealthy because then actually within what, a week or
18:42
two, my hip was hurting and I had to go to the doctor.
18:45
And the doctor's like, Oh well, you dingbat, you tore your IT
18:50
band, which cannot be fixed. No fixing.
18:54
You probably should not start running out of nowhere and
18:56
decide. And like within a week I was up
18:58
to two hours a day running on a treadmill, with no running
19:02
experience before that. I mean, I understand, yeah,
19:06
having like literally this week I was out.
19:10
I have a new habit that I've formed where I go for a walk on
19:16
my day off. And this week decided, well, I
19:21
don't have a lot of time, so if I want to get all my steps in,
19:24
also it was cold, I'll just run instead.
19:27
And I'm not a runner and I've been told not to run given my
19:29
prior knee surgery. Yeah.
19:31
But I just decided I was going to go for it.
19:33
And much like you, I was like, well, I'll be fine.
19:35
And I didn't pre, I didn't stretch, I didn't pregame.
19:38
And I just went for it and ran a couple miles.
19:40
And then that was literally yesterday.
19:43
And today I have some Charley horses in my thighs that are not
19:49
great, so I sort of get it. Also the biking.
19:52
You remember that when I started that?
19:54
Yes, I do. I do.
19:57
Luke is a likes to go biking and I think there's nothing wrong
20:01
with that. I used to enjoy a bike ride
20:03
every once in a while and I'd go for like an hour or so.
20:06
It was a part of my pre warm up workout.
20:08
Yeah, remember that. I'd go bike ride for an hour and
20:11
then I'd do 30 minutes of Pilates 5 * a week.
20:15
Yep, that was my. That was my deal.
20:18
Luke decided, and we had gone bike riding a couple times back
20:21
then, but then, well, like I said, I got an injury and I
20:24
probably stopped a lot of that at that time.
20:27
But oh, maybe that was when I started working for the gym
20:31
because then I got into yoga. That's regardless.
20:34
So you had decided to start biking not that long ago.
20:37
What is that like 4 years ago? Five years ago. 2020 well, I
20:41
think it was 2020 because I did a lot of stuff in 2020 when
20:45
COVID hit the world and there was nothing to do.
20:47
Right. And so you decided you're going
20:49
to ride like 50 miles in like a month.
20:53
Well. You were like, there's a
20:55
marathon and if I sign up for today I haven't bike ridden in
21:01
like 5 years. If I sign up for today, I'll be
21:06
at 50 miles in three weeks. That's almost perfectly
21:09
accurate. I started in the spring when it
21:11
was nice and I hopped on my mountain bike that I've had
21:15
since high school and I went, it was, I think like a little over
21:20
10 miles, maybe up, up, not up to 15, but close.
21:24
And I got home and I could barely walk up our eight steps
21:28
to get to the main level. And then I ate everything
21:31
insight. I ate all the like, all the
21:33
little like bar or like candy, not candy bars, you know, like
21:38
the I like granola bars. I ate a bunch of those and like
21:40
little pieces of fruit and fruit snacks and then I opened the
21:43
fridge and I'm eating cheese sticks and like, whatever.
21:46
I just chowed down like crazy. Then I took a shower and
21:49
immediately fell asleep. And then and then I couldn't
21:53
walk very well and I was like, that was awesome.
21:56
I'm gonna do it again next week and steadily built up.
21:58
And yes, signed up for my first. It was a century, but not it was
22:03
a metric century. So 100 kilometers, which is like
22:07
62 miles, which yes, was probably not the best
22:11
progression to go from I don't ride a bike to I'm going to ride
22:14
60 miles in three months. I feel like it was shorter than
22:17
that but every year since. Yeah, I've gone a full 100 miles
22:22
after my training, hence the hat that I'm wearing today and the
22:25
shirt if I. Say training.
22:27
It's not training, it is training.
22:28
It's like day one I'm going to do 50 miles.
22:31
Give or take. That's not training.
22:34
Well, you. Haven't ridden your bike for six
22:36
months and you're like, hop on the bike 50 miles.
22:39
That's. Not true, but I have gone so far
22:43
and have the training to do endurance biking in general that
22:47
it's not. It's not as drastic as it would
22:50
be had I not been doing it for years.
22:54
Right. But if you take six months off,
22:57
this might be a blueberry doughnut moment because I mean,
23:02
but I do, I do actually think that there's just almost, I know
23:06
I get it right. Like I get this obsession about
23:09
it. And I'm sure it's like the good
23:12
endorphins feel good. Oh yeah, right.
23:14
And it's like, oh, they're going to feel really good.
23:16
But for me personally, since I've gone through a huge, I, I
23:22
don't know, I, I, I, it's not that I enjoy working out.
23:26
I enjoy the endorphins from working out.
23:29
Everybody does. I don't.
23:31
I enjoyed not working out. Right.
23:35
Like I don't. It's because you sold guilt.
23:39
Maybe it's car. No, I mean, it could be.
23:41
It could. Be for yourself.
23:42
But I think part of it is in my 27 plus some some years when I
23:48
don't, my body feels it. When I was younger, I didn't
23:52
feel it, you know, like, and, and for me, my goals today are
23:56
so much different than I was when I was in my early 20s,
23:59
riding my bike and all that. Like, it's so different, right?
24:02
Like then I was all about, well, gosh, losing weight, all of
24:06
those things, you know, to be whatever weird thing I had in my
24:09
mind that required that I was never good enough, all of that.
24:12
Like this is where I was doing that.
24:14
And then at some point after I stopped doing it for a while, I
24:17
was like, my body's just sore. I don't like that I can't do
24:22
things that I think in my head I should be able to do.
24:24
And this is going to be a hard thing to adjust to as I age, but
24:29
but like I don't want to lose my flexibility, my strength, all of
24:35
those things so. I don't want you to either.
24:39
I don't. I don't either.
24:40
I mean, it's it's, I don't. Want me to?
24:42
Either some of it is inevitable, right?
24:43
I mean, I've already sure injured myself many times over,
24:48
but like and I've had to do some adjustments in the type of stuff
24:52
I do to prevent further injury. Yeah, I've done that.
24:56
I don't know that you have, but I've done.
24:58
That I just go hard until I can't.
25:00
I did that, but me on when you when you sit there.
25:04
So I like to do PYO, which is Pilates and yoga, right.
25:08
And when you get to the point and you're like, Oh, I can't
25:11
even lift my arm because I've messed up my shoulder so bad and
25:16
I can't Oh, it was it was awful. So again, that wasn't
25:20
necessarily I wouldn't even say that that was doing something
25:23
wrong. It was just it, it was a
25:26
momentary injury that is now since really actually affected
25:29
my abilities for a couple years now.
25:33
Right. Which they told me three to six
25:35
months. It was a lie.
25:38
It was a lie, it. Was a lie, yeah, but I'm better
25:41
than I was after my initial injury.
25:46
But I have to do some modifications to keep myself
25:48
safe. I just take inspiration from my
25:52
aunt and uncle. I well, they're amazing.
25:56
That's what it's saying. They're both in their early and
25:58
mid 80s. Yep, Yep.
26:00
And they're still like going out on their big property and
26:03
they're tapping Maple trees in the spring and they're riding
26:06
bicycles all over the countryside and.
26:09
Yeah, no, they're 11. At 70 they did a cross country
26:12
bike tour. Yeah, from one end of the
26:14
country to the other. Yeah, amazing took.
26:17
Three or four months or some insane thing.
26:20
Well, but. So I figure if they can do it, I
26:22
can do it. I mean, I do, I do actually feel
26:25
that there's something to continual movement that.
26:28
Helps you movement for sure. Yeah, but I mean, again, as
26:31
someone who's had injuries that have literally knocked me on my
26:35
butt where I've had to stop, I understand that sometimes it's
26:38
hard to get that momentum back up, which is why when I was
26:41
saying, wow, this is a real long back to my original point.
26:47
Why a like a point in time, like a New Year's resolution doesn't
26:52
work for me because something will happen, right?
26:55
That is maybe inside my control, maybe outside of my control.
26:59
And I'll be like, great, well, now it's done.
27:00
And I, you know, and the guilt of now I can't do it or, you
27:04
know, well, you know, I'll sit there when I got fallen out of a
27:08
workout routine, my brain says I have to start on a Monday.
27:15
And so it could be Tuesday and I'll be like, well, I really do
27:18
want to start working out again. And but it's Tuesday.
27:22
What am I going to do? I don't know.
27:24
I might do the same thing, but I don't know.
27:26
I'll have to think about it. Yeah, I don't know if you do,
27:28
but this is me. I'm like this is this is for for
27:31
working out some things. It's like it has to start on a
27:33
Sunday. I'm very specific about days,
27:35
but if I'm past that day, like the concept of there's no time
27:39
like today that does not sit in my head.
27:43
I'm like, no, it needs to start at this time because I've pre
27:46
scheduled this to be the time, right?
27:48
Like if I'm gonna try to eat better, right?
27:50
Well, who's gonna start eating better on a Saturday?
27:53
Who does that? That's absurd.
27:56
Crazy. I mean, would you ever?
27:59
I really. Do I have no idea?
28:02
I don't know that I would separate the days.
28:06
Very interesting that's. I you don't.
28:09
OK, well, that's a small poll for folks.
28:12
That's not the question. Just for comments maybe.
28:14
Just for comments, let me know if you need to start something
28:18
on a certain day or or not that would.
28:22
Be interesting to learn if everyone's like, yeah, well, I
28:24
can't do it in the middle of the week.
28:25
No, you can't. Who can start something in the
28:27
middle of the week? I can't.
28:28
Interesting. Yeah, yeah, I'm very, I'm very
28:31
structured. I thought about starting what's
28:33
called fat biking. What's that?
28:36
It's with real fat tires on the bike for winter because when I
28:41
went for a walk recently after it has snowed and become cold in
28:46
Minnesota, I was walking in the woods with our daughter and on
28:51
the same trail that we were walking in the woods, there was
28:53
two guys riding their fat tire bikes.
28:56
And the tires are like almost car tire fat.
28:58
They're like, I don't know how big that is, 4/4 inches wide.
29:02
And they're super knobby. And they're like riding their,
29:06
you know, it's like a basically a modified mountain bike with
29:08
hugely fat tires. And they're wearing like full
29:11
like face masks and ski goggles. And the one guy had is actually
29:16
kind of cool on his handlebars. He had like these, I don't know,
29:21
handlebar gloves, but they were part of the handlebar and they
29:25
were leopard print and they were huge.
29:27
And he had his hands inside of those like hand warmer objects
29:30
that were attached to the bike. And I thought, man, maybe I
29:34
could bike all year round. I think you would be better off
29:38
like just getting that there's a machine you can get and lift
29:43
your back tire, your tires on your bike.
29:46
Oh, you mean like in the house? Yeah, well, it's not the same.
29:49
Well, OK, I would just turn on. I like being outside.
29:52
I know you do I well and for me like the reason that wouldn't
29:55
work most likely well also. But I would not go biking in the
30:00
cold. I'd y'all if you don't live in
30:03
Minnesota don't understand how cold it gets.
30:05
I do have some cold gear for that.
30:07
If you live in Minnesota, you understand, understand how when
30:11
the wind hits, it's cold, real cold.
30:13
And if you're making the wind hit harder, faster.
30:16
Because you're biking. Yeah, that's awful.
30:18
Like, you know, think about going on like a flight.
30:21
Ride or something ski gog. No, no.
30:24
I. It's like a winter sport, like
30:25
you have to think about it differently than regular
30:27
cycling. It's like it's like if you were
30:29
going skiing, like you were sledding have a snow suit and
30:33
you have special footwear and gloves and face and head and all
30:37
of it's all covered up. So that would be something I I
30:41
might actually pursue if why don't?
30:45
I mean, the other problem is bikes are expensive now.
30:49
Like I feel like when we were younger bikes weren't as
30:52
expensive as they are because like now if you get like I
30:55
actually looked this year because I go to the bike store
30:57
frequently for repairs, Yes, because.
30:58
You go to the bike store. Well, because my road bike and
31:01
my mountain bike need tune UPS because they're old.
31:04
But so I went there and I'm walking around while they're
31:06
doing some sort of fix on my road bike and I'm looking at a
31:08
hybrid bike, which is supposed to be sort of an in between and
31:12
those like start at like 750. OK y'all, this is how bougie
31:16
Luke is. I'm he's like I I.
31:18
Won. I know, but I I promise.
31:21
You got to give me a little credit.
31:22
You can get cheaper bikes, you choose not to.
31:25
You're like I need. I hold on, have two free bikes.
31:29
I know, but I'm saying like I. Don't even think I paid for a
31:31
bike in my life for me. Sure.
31:34
That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying when you're talking
31:36
about buying a bike, you're like, OK, I gotta go get Like,
31:39
you're not like I'm gonna get. Not going to target is what
31:42
you're saying? Exactly, yes, yes, but I still
31:45
I'm sure they're more expensive than we are kids.
31:46
I I guarantee you they're more expensive than we are.
31:49
Just seems like an unreasonable amount.
31:50
That's because you've leveled your expectations so much
31:54
higher, I think than probably what you would have been raised
31:58
with, right? Like I mean when I was raised.
32:00
It was for sure, I mean. It's a garage sale bike for 10
32:03
bucks. Yeah, and that that was that was
32:05
fine back in the day. I remember one of my coolest
32:07
birthday presents I ever got was a BMX bike.
32:10
I don't know if it was a hand me down, it probably was because my
32:12
mom didn't have a lot of money, but it was red and it was so
32:15
cool. I was, oh man, was I excited
32:18
about that little bike. Yeah, yeah.
32:19
Well, bikes meant freedom when you were a kid.
32:21
That's back in the day, that's for sure.
32:23
I don't know that it means that anymore.
32:24
It doesn't. It's weird.
32:25
Yeah, but but anyhow, though, I think that, I mean, I, I would,
32:31
that just sounds miserable to me.
32:32
I, I know that the I used to work for a woman who would say
32:37
that there isn't bad weather, just bad clothing.
32:40
And that's actually like a old saying from some.
32:43
I mean, that's sort of Fair. Yeah, but there.
32:45
Is bad weather though. There's just clothing that can
32:47
help to make it less miserable. And she would tell me because I
32:51
would, every time I'd come in, I'd just be complaining about
32:54
the weather. And she's like, you just need
32:55
better clothing. And I thought, well, I I don't
32:59
think there's good enough clothing to make me feel like
33:01
it's 80. Degrees.
33:02
How about kids today who don't even wear coats in the winter?
33:05
Oh, this is not new. This is not weird, I just don't
33:08
get. It, I mean, when I was a kid, it
33:10
was the same thing. We just like to think that we're
33:13
just older and we've learned. And I will say.
33:15
I think so. I feel like I wanted to bundle
33:18
up when it was cold. I mean, I mean.
33:20
Part of it might have been because I wanted to go outside.
33:23
That's part of it. I don't know, as a teenager it
33:26
really mattered more how I looked than how I felt.
33:29
I see. And now in my my wiser years, I
33:34
prefer feeling good to. I mean, I can't help but look.
33:38
Good. Yeah, there.
33:39
It is so so since I look good, I want to feel.
33:46
Good, now you can have both. I know, I know, lucky me.
33:49
I don't even have to choose, but I, I, so I, I don't even know
33:55
where we're going with that. It's something about bikes.
33:57
Doesn't matter. Fat tire bikes.
33:59
All fat tire bikes we. Went on a tangent we did.
34:02
Anytime I can talk about bikes, I'm ready to talk about bikes I.
34:04
Know, and I kind of just plopped you right in there Yeah, you
34:07
did. I know it wasn't even what.
34:09
We were. I bought you a bike, remember?
34:10
Yeah, yeah. And it hurt my knee.
34:12
And then you were like, Nope. Yeah, really badly so either.
34:16
I tried to give it to our kid and she was like, I don't want a
34:18
bike. We.
34:19
Were like, but you could go places and she was like, you
34:22
could drive me places. I think that's the common thing.
34:25
You don't see as many kids out there on bikes anymore, which,
34:28
you know, whatever the world is different, everything is
34:30
different and that's OK. I mean, the nostalgia I think we
34:34
have for, you know, what we feel is better times.
34:37
It's so interesting that that's it's generationally accurate all
34:40
the time. All the time.
34:41
Like our parents are talking about their version of the good
34:44
old days and we're talking about our version of the good old days
34:46
and they're and my grandparents and yours were, I'm sure,
34:49
talking about we used to churn our own butter.
34:52
I mean like, you know. I never heard anybody talk about
34:55
that. I guarantee you my grandparents
34:57
or great grandparents on the farm, I for sure guarantee you
35:00
they did. I'll trust you.
35:01
I'll. Trust, milk the cows and all
35:03
that. Well, I, you know, I guess I do
35:05
remember some stories like that. I mean, my my grandmother would
35:09
talk about finding asparagus on the rail road tracks to help
35:12
feed family, you know, OK. So I don't know if that was
35:19
maybe not the same as a yeah, I'm turning my own butter.
35:21
But, you know, I don't know if that was a good thing either,
35:23
actually, because she was probably doing it because they
35:25
were hungry and. But still, you know, I mean,
35:28
resources are different today and you know, I don't know but.
35:33
Asparagus is a healthy thing to eat.
35:35
I love asparagus, I really do, and it's best with steak.
35:40
It is for sure one time I grilled well, actually now a lot
35:44
of times when I grill steak and I have I grill asparagus and
35:47
somehow I make the asparagus taste like steak.
35:49
Yep, that's that's it right now. Delicious man.
35:52
Why are we talking about food? I don't know.
35:55
Well be hungry again. I probably, I'm, I can always
35:58
eat well. And that's I think part of the
36:00
issue too. I can always eat in having the
36:02
concept of a, you know, like a New Year's resolution.
36:06
That's why I switched a salad cuz I do always eat.
36:09
I was like, well I'm gonna eat all the time.
36:10
I better eat something that's like a little less on calories
36:13
cuz now I look in the mirror and I can tell if I ate too much.
36:17
That's messed up about being older.
36:19
Yeah, like I can eat some cake and then see it in the mirror
36:22
the next day, right? Just looking right at me like,
36:24
oh, you like that cake, didn't you?
36:26
Well, a lot of like the fitness gurus that I follow, it's not
36:30
about not eating the cake or anything like that, but you
36:33
know, and it's not about dieting.
36:36
There's actually this huge thing right now, this scary skinny
36:38
thing that's kind of a big deal. Scary skinny.
36:42
Yeah, it's, you know, there's a lot of people doing it.
36:44
Oh, I don't know that you really want me to, but like they're
36:48
like, it's, it's the new thing. For a while we were all there
36:50
was a lot more body positivity going on, you know, which is
36:53
great. But now with the advancement of
37:00
those injections and I'm gonna forget the GLP or.
37:02
GLP, that's it. Yeah, the the, yeah, I know what
37:06
you're talking about. Yeah, yeah.
37:07
Again, the concept of being back to being thin under any, any for
37:11
any purpose. And you know, I don't want to
37:14
trigger anybody. And I know I certainly have had
37:16
my own journey down the road of thinness at all costs.
37:19
You know, it's, it's, I don't, I don't know, it's, it's so that's
37:25
what scary skinny is, you know, this new word, you know, new
37:28
phrase going out there in the fitness world.
37:30
It's not, I mean, I maybe you know what, it's three weeks in
37:33
the future. It might be all over maybe, but
37:36
it's, it's certainly a thing where people are saying, are we
37:39
not worried about, you know, actual strength and you know,
37:43
like your organs working well and all of that.
37:46
Like for me, health and Wellness means something so much
37:50
different than it used to mean. Oh sure, like vanity was vanity
37:54
for vanity's sake, and now it's more like I actually want my
37:57
body to function. I want my body to do what I want
37:59
it to do which. And bonus if it if it achieves
38:02
some vanity. Right.
38:03
You know what, though? But I think maybe part of that
38:05
is because I've had my body not function the way I think it
38:08
should or the way I'm used to, you know, like it suddenly
38:11
doesn't do, but I think it should do.
38:12
And then, you know, like dumb things, right?
38:15
Like when I throw my back out like how how I.
38:18
Still don't know how that happens.
38:19
Yeah, I've never done that. I've done it a few times and I
38:22
will tell you that there is one triggering thing guaranteed, and
38:26
that's jumping on trampoline. No trampolines for you.
38:28
In the backyard, maybe elsewhere, it might not be so
38:31
bad, but it's probably a quality issue there.
38:33
But that'll that'll for sure throw my back out.
38:36
OK, You know, and I mean, when I was a kid, I could jump on a
38:38
trampoline for hours. Didn't matter, you know, but I
38:40
can't today or something dumb like, you know, you sleep on
38:44
something wrong and you wake up and you're like.
38:46
He just did nothing and then you're like, oh, I'm broken.
38:49
I'm broken for the next two days.
38:51
Take some Advil at night, maybe, maybe I'll sleep it off, maybe,
38:54
or maybe I'll create a new pain. So I think that when those types
38:59
of things start happening or start happening more regularly
39:02
for me was when things really changed.
39:05
And I want my body to do what I believe it should be able to do.
39:10
And can I just say science? Can we please work towards that?
39:15
I don't care about AII don't care about like, I mean, I OK, I
39:19
care about other things like obviously cancer, you know, like
39:21
cure, cure the things. Absolutely.
39:24
But can we just put effort into that like I, I, you know, no
39:29
shade on anyone who's in the plastic surgery, but can we use
39:32
those sciences better for the insides to make them work
39:36
better? You know, for I don't know.
39:39
That's what I want. I want like youthful insides.
39:41
That's. Youthful insides?
39:43
That sounds like it could be like a real good science
39:47
publication for a health journal.
39:49
You're welcome. Yeah.
39:50
To the Scientologist. Who?
39:53
Or or if you make like a health and Wellness podcast, that'd be
39:56
a good title. But I don't really have the
39:59
greatest. But you know what?
40:01
I would guess that. Worst Am I healthy?
40:03
I would guess on your show there you go, anyone who takes it over
40:07
useful insides. Useful insides.
40:09
Yeah, yeah. And I would love to learn how
40:12
to, how to get there, but again, it has to be kind of on my own
40:17
terms too. Like that I I want to do it and
40:19
all of that. I don't, I don't know.
40:22
It's it's just an interesting time of year when everyone gets
40:25
so obsessed about that for whatever reason, and then it
40:29
goes away and then we're like, oh, cool swimsuit season, you
40:32
know, so like, it's a vicious cycle.
40:35
And I I just for me personally and the acrobats that go on in
40:39
my mind, I need to simplify for what is it that I really, really
40:44
desire. Yeah.
40:46
And chase that. I will say it is also
40:49
dramatically unfair for women. It is dramatically unfair for
40:53
women. You're.
40:54
Right, and it's messed up that it's OK to just be out of shape
40:57
and unhealthy if you're a guy that's like way more societally
41:00
acceptable. Well, Dad bod's hot, you know.
41:03
Which is the dumbest thing I don't get.
41:04
Like what? And that it's not hot.
41:06
I'm sorry I. Don't have an issue with anyone.
41:08
Anyone looks the way they want to look?
41:11
I mean, yes, if that's true, if that's what you're going for,
41:14
great. And there's a lot of people who
41:15
are totally fine. Yeah.
41:16
So, you know, do what you you gotta do.
41:18
Right, right. I mean it again for.
41:20
Me, it's really more about functionality, and that ties
41:22
into lots of other things. Yeah, I mean.
41:26
It's not just physical either. It's, you know, it's mind, body,
41:29
spirit. It's that whole.
41:30
Yes, yes. But for me that's a big part of
41:33
it, right? Like if something's out of
41:35
whack, something else is going to be out of whack.
41:38
And a lot of times for me it's my mind where like that's not
41:42
working properly. And I have found for me
41:45
personally, a high correlation of where my mental health is
41:50
with with my physical health. Yeah.
41:52
You know, I mean if and you know, I mean I don't know anyone
41:56
who we. All the psychiatrists agree with
41:59
you, I just want you to know. That I have found this to be
42:01
true in my life though, too. I mean, like when I've had
42:03
periods of, you know, severe mental health issues, my
42:07
physical health was also just not there.
42:11
It's really hard to pull out of either.
42:13
Yeah. You know, and I.
42:16
I say this all the time because the psychiatrists say this in
42:19
their books, that if part of your return to Wellness mentally
42:26
doesn't include some attempt at a return to Wellness physically,
42:31
it's dramatically harder to achieve.
42:34
I think. We had a little chorus in the
42:36
background. I'm not.
42:37
Sure, if our y'all are hearing that, I'm sorry sometimes.
42:40
Our dog, he's letting everyone know he's here.
42:43
I would suggest anyone just go to seek their own doctors
42:48
opinions on that and I I don't know I I.
42:51
Think, see, and I think I don't know, I think you should listen
42:53
to them. I know you don't want to offend
42:54
people and I'm actually OK you. Don't mind.
42:58
Well, like, I mean, it's I. Don't know, I'm not a doctor and
43:01
neither are. You I I I understand that.
43:03
But I've, I've some. I've read books and listened to
43:09
many actually qualified people who say these things like it's
43:16
not, you know, meant to offend, but.
43:18
I'm not saying that that that isn't true.
43:22
I'm saying that it's narrow minded that that is that is the
43:26
path. Whereas some well.
43:27
No, no, no, no. It's not the path.
43:29
It's part of the path. And it can be simple.
43:32
It can be like, you know, if you've had reason to be
43:35
physically out of shape because that happens and it's OK.
43:38
And it's normal that some attempt to return to more
43:42
physicality, whether that's something really small and
43:45
simple in the beginning, like hey, maybe you just need to go
43:48
for 100 yard walk. You know there.
43:51
You know, like a real small start just to do something to
43:53
prove to yourself you can do more than what you've convinced
43:57
yourself you can do. Yeah.
43:59
And this might be a little too deep, but I will say there have
44:02
been times for me where that would be just, I don't, I don't
44:05
know, like it needed to start at a different place.
44:07
And again, that's why I personally say that you know to
44:11
find a professional to help you if you're right dealing.
44:14
Well, they would probably know when to approach something like
44:17
that. Right, because there would
44:18
certainly timing of your medication.
44:20
You can't just be like, hey, why don't you hop on a treadmill
44:24
when they're like, hello, I'm depressed.
44:26
Of course, that's never going to be the course.
44:28
Like, you know, that's why a qualified professional is
44:30
important, but of what I have seen, it seems like there is
44:34
always some sort of integration there.
44:36
There can be, and I think for those.
44:38
Outside of, you know, limited, like actually can't, like I
44:42
can't do this physical thing because, you know, something's
44:45
broken, bent or irreparable damage, etcetera.
44:49
Right. And I yeah.
44:50
And that's real too. But you know.
44:51
It really is for people. And so like finding another way
44:54
that will work. But I mean, there's a lot that
44:56
is Wellness, Yeah. And there's only, I think, to
45:02
strive for perfection at the very first stop.
45:05
That might be a little much just.
45:06
A little much, yeah. I mean, I've seen that.
45:08
But strive for. Something, I mean, what if
45:09
somebody can't walk? Can you pick up a little
45:11
dumbbell little 5 pounder? Do a couple little just to get
45:16
something going. Raise your heart rate a little
45:18
bit, you know. I don't know.
45:19
Hey, look, let me ask you a question.
45:21
Oh, you got to look in your eye. Here we go people.
45:24
This is the moment you have all been waiting for and I'm a
45:27
little intimidated about right now in this corner.
45:32
Funny that this has been our intro for so long.
45:35
Claiming to weigh in at 135 lbs Is Amber currently contemplating
45:41
one heck of a question. Here we go.
45:45
And in this corner we've got Luke and I don't know what his
45:49
stats are, but he's his beard is long.
45:52
It is long. I've been growing it out for
45:54
Movember, which it's now December, and I kind of just
45:57
like it being long because it feels.
45:59
Wintry. Santa E actually oh.
46:02
Cute, cute, cute, cute. And my stats are actually have a
46:06
weigh in very close to after Thanksgiving at the doctor.
46:09
I weighed in at 193, which I was like, you know, for being right
46:14
after Thanksgiving. I ain't mad.
46:16
I ain't mad about it because for me, 185 is like, is the peak
46:22
weight. I mean, like, perfect health is
46:24
probably like 175, but I haven't been that since I was like 18.
46:28
So that ain't happening. Yeah, I I have lots of opinions
46:32
about scales and all of that, but so let me ask you.
46:35
I was going to ask you a question, remember?
46:36
Oh, we didn't do our wins and losses tally.
46:38
We don't know them because this is pre recorded.
46:41
Oh, that's true. And well, we were tied last time
46:43
we. Were tied, yeah.
46:44
We're like always tied. We'll get caught.
46:46
I know. I think that means that it means
46:49
something. I don't know what it means, but
46:51
it means something. It.
46:52
Means I need to be better at arguing.
46:54
You know what it means that we both really think that we're
46:57
right all the time and we aren't.
47:02
That's not. Or we are.
47:04
Pill to swallow? No.
47:06
Chicken or the egg? That's not the same question, is
47:09
it? I mean, it's different.
47:10
I know I think I'm right and I know you think you're right.
47:13
And I think that this podcast is teaching us that it's about 5050
47:18
currently. It might get better.
47:20
It's teaching me that I'm right almost most of the time.
47:27
OK, so I'll get back to the question.
47:29
Yeah. You had a question.
47:30
OK, OK. A lot of people are going to be
47:32
working on goals, all sorts of goals.
47:33
Right now. A lot of people are looking at
47:35
resolutions. I'm not.
47:36
I resolved to never have a New Year's resolution.
47:39
The question I have for you, yeah, is do you think you should
47:45
push your significant other on their fitness goals?
47:52
That is you. That's a that's a trap question.
47:57
I object. I'm sorry, I you're right.
47:59
I'm going to rephrase it on their health goals.
48:04
Well. That was the question.
48:06
This is this is very tricky. So OK, the the words and the
48:12
phraseology are important for both the question and the
48:16
response. So I'm going to respond to first
48:21
of all, I think I think the answer is yes, but not in the in
48:26
a pushy way. So I think that what did you
48:31
say? I felt so trapped.
48:32
I forgot half of it already. You said something about
48:35
pushing. So do I think it's OK to push
48:38
you for what? For your health goals or fitness
48:42
goal? What did you?
48:42
Think you should push your significant other in their
48:45
health goals? Health goals.
48:48
OK, so. And it might have been a trap
48:52
initially, but it wasn't really intending to be.
48:54
So I still, OK, so my answer is yes.
48:56
And I think everyone should vote yes on this because I think
48:59
supporting people's health is important and it's not easy for
49:04
any of us to pursue health as we've just discussed for quite
49:07
some time. It's difficult.
49:09
It's difficult if you're going to try to eat better.
49:11
It's difficult if you're going to try to rest better.
49:14
It's difficult if you're going to try to increase your
49:17
physicality, if you're going to try to strengthen your
49:21
mentality, if you're going to try to deepen your spirituality
49:25
because we talked about mind, body, spirit, all of that stuff
49:28
is difficult. All of it takes work, it takes
49:30
time, it takes time management, dedication, scheduling and a lot
49:35
of discipline. And that's not easy for people
49:37
to do because our brains are just wired to go to the easy way
49:41
out. I mean, that goes back to like
49:43
when we were cave people and the, the, the, the case being
49:51
that if you are pursuing health and Wellness, because I think
49:56
based on our conversation and the question that that would
49:59
mean two things. One, your significant other
50:02
means you're in a relationship, so you're supporting each other
50:05
theoretically, hopefully by default.
50:07
And then two, that you have a health goal.
50:09
So that would mean that you yourself, the other of the
50:12
significant other couple has something they're working
50:15
towards, which is their goal. So they have created and owned
50:19
it. Am I then, or whoever whatever
50:22
side of this argument is, if, if that other significant other is
50:26
to push the person, I don't think push is a great word
50:31
because it brings in feelings of pushy.
50:34
But I do think that it's important to as much as you can
50:41
without wounding a relationship because you don't want to do
50:45
that to push as far as you can, whatever that line is, wherever
50:48
the edge of that envelope is to get that person to do what they
50:52
themselves want to do because pursuing a goal that is healthy
50:56
is healthy. So if, if you say I want to,
51:00
I'll just use myself as an example.
51:02
I want to eat a salad every day for lunch.
51:05
OK, so that means that is it OK for you, if that's my goal for
51:11
health, to say, hey, did you have a salad for lunch today?
51:15
I think it's OK for you to say that.
51:17
Or if I say I want to eat a cheeseburger for you to say,
51:20
well, you said you were going to eat a salad.
51:21
I think that that's OK. Now it's also probably not the
51:26
end of the world to eat a cheeseburger, but but I I think
51:29
that that's OK. And similarly, I would say you
51:31
could, you could put this into any of these arenas if you say,
51:35
well, part of what I want to do is I want to have some time set
51:38
aside each day where I'm going to journal.
51:41
And if if I hadn't and you said something like, well, have you
51:45
journaled this week? And I said no.
51:47
And you should. And you'd be like, well, maybe
51:49
you should. You should get back into that.
51:50
I think that's OK. I don't think it'd be OK if
51:53
you'd be like, you promised and that's messed up.
51:56
And you're like going back on your goals.
51:58
Yeah. That's not a cool way to be a
52:00
person and you don't do that. So but I do think you're
52:03
supportive. Like, you know, when you go to
52:04
the grocery store, you're like, hey, how many salads do you
52:07
want? And you give me the space I need
52:09
in the morning to have that time to myself to do that meditation
52:12
and journaling and getting, you know, centered in myself.
52:15
So so yes, I think it's OK to push a significant other to do
52:21
what they want to do, which is to be healthy and whatever,
52:23
whatever that means for them. So yes, that's my argument.
52:28
So I guess I am, I'm going to say for me, obviously I have a
52:36
different answer because I do think push is a very specific
52:40
term and I think support and pushing are two different
52:43
things, right? Obviously, right, hold up push,
52:47
right? These are two very different
52:49
actions. OK, I I don't necessarily think
52:55
that if you've determined your goal is that you want to eat a
52:58
salad for lunch, we're just going to go with that because I
53:00
don't care. And I'm at the store and I say,
53:04
how many salads do you want? You know why I say that?
53:06
Why? Because it's on the list enough
53:08
times and I know that you want salad.
53:10
So then I'm just being helpful supporting your goal.
53:14
But if you were to put cheeseburger on there, I would
53:17
say what kind of cheese? OK.
53:20
And also, where are you cooking your cheeseburger?
53:23
What kind of bread? I would do that.
53:25
I wouldn't care for me personally.
53:27
That's not while it's your goal, I don't think that I have any
53:32
right to hold you accountable to it.
53:34
Right? Like on like cuz that's the
53:36
thing that you want to do. And you might change your mind
53:38
and you might decide, you know what?
53:40
I'm not going to do it with salad.
53:41
I and so like, so for me, I, I wouldn't say push for many
53:48
reasons. Support.
53:49
Yeah, there are sometimes where I'm like, you know what, what
53:52
if, what if I think that your, your health goal is not
53:55
necessarily the healthiest, right?
53:57
I didn't tell you to not do it right.
53:59
Like there have been times where you've had bike stuff, right?
54:02
Some injuries, you know, and I don't tell you, well, your
54:08
overall goal is to have a healthy knee or healthy hip
54:12
riding 100 miles in a day. Have your like, I mean, I will
54:16
say, I might say something like, have you talked with your doctor
54:18
about that, right? You know, I've done that.
54:22
But I don't say, well, if your overall health goal is that your
54:24
body works, maybe you shouldn't destroy it on purpose, right?
54:28
Like, I don't push you towards anything because First off,
54:33
let's be for real folks, Luke is not pushable.
54:37
OK. Luke will do what he sets his
54:41
mind to and either I will either it's with or without support.
54:48
It's true if you've set your mind to it.
54:50
I like, I like that you think I have that level of motivation or
54:54
dedication or whatever, right? I don't think you need me
54:56
pushing you. You've never needed me pushing
54:58
you. You know, sometimes I mean like.
55:02
Good, makes me feel strong. Yeah, but I mean, like me also,
55:06
though, if you were to push me, let's say like I like to work
55:09
out and you know, it's been a couple weeks, which has happened
55:12
many times. You've never questioned me about
55:13
my working out. I'm just going to tell that
55:15
right here, right now, so the whole audience doesn't come at
55:18
you. Oh, good.
55:19
Because they would. They were going to come at me.
55:20
They might. Lucas never pushed me to work
55:23
out in his conscious. There was 1 moment when he was
55:29
on a medication for surgery where you might have done that
55:33
but in your regular consciousness.
55:36
I don't remember that so good. You did.
55:38
It was so bad. I was so mad.
55:40
But in your regular consciousness, no, you've never
55:42
pushed me and said you should work out.
55:45
Never. And that's.
55:47
Can I? Can I say thank you?
55:50
That I'm telling the world that you haven't done that.
55:52
Yes, absolutely. Nice, cuz you okay?
55:55
I mean, if you did, I would be really, I would be hurt by that,
55:57
okay. Cuz while you might see it as
56:00
it's what she wants to do, I would hear it differently.
56:02
And part of that is my own issues.
56:05
And like we were talking before, you can't know what's all going
56:08
on with somebody. There are some.
56:10
Even if you live with them. Even if you live with them, you
56:13
can't know what's going on necessarily. 100% with my mental
56:17
stuff going on, right? You can't.
56:19
And so I appreciate that cuz there would be a whole another
56:22
flip side that you could trigger that you wouldn't even realize
56:25
that you trigger. Now, I think both of us have
56:29
gotten times where we're like, your pursuit of Wellness is
56:33
inconvenient for me, right? Sure.
56:35
Like there have been times like I don't want you to work out
56:37
right now because I wanna go do this thing.
56:39
There's definitely been times you told me not to go on as long
56:41
a bike ride. Right, absolutely.
56:43
Cuz I'm like, that's gonna break you and then you won't be useful
56:47
to me. So I mean like we do have.
56:49
That, and by useful you mean make you dinner.
56:52
I mean like on the days you're supposed to.
56:54
So I would say I mean so you don't push in that manner.
56:59
So I don't want anyone to think that you do cuz I would probably
57:04
have a hard time myself with that I.
57:06
Did one time tell you you should be able to lift a weight?
57:10
You're mad. This was when he was on
57:12
medication. Is that what it was?
57:14
OK. It was really.
57:15
I remember you being mad. It was memorable.
57:17
Really mad? Yes, yeah, yes.
57:20
The weights sitting right over there.
57:22
And I can lift it. I don't know what you're.
57:23
Probably, yeah. No, I don't even remember most.
57:25
Of what happened, Oh yes. But anyhow, I, I don't think I
57:29
think support and pushing are two different things.
57:31
I think that the person needs to be accountable to their own
57:34
self. Personally, I need to be
57:36
accountable to my own self and I know when I'm not cutting the
57:39
mustard. So do you think, OK, so just to,
57:42
I mean, we're a little long in the tooth and I'm actually OK
57:45
with having a little bit of a long episode 'cause it seems
57:48
important. But so do you think, and I'll
57:51
preface this by saying that all of the people in like podcast
57:54
slash health world that I've listened to or read talk about
57:58
having accountability partners as part of like one of one of
58:02
the very few and functional ways to do that.
58:04
Do you think that that can't be the significant other?
58:08
That's a phenomenal question and I'm glad you're asking because
58:10
as soon as you said that, I'm like, buddy.
58:12
You got, you got real, man. I was just curious because I,
58:15
you know, so you think it's a good idea?
58:17
For me. At all.
58:19
Like you shouldn't even have one.
58:20
No, you should never be my. Oh, sure.
58:23
OK. That was my question.
58:24
But I was wondering, OK, OK, OK. Right.
58:26
So you could have like one of your girls be an accountability
58:29
partner. A person, yes.
58:30
Or whatever, right. OK.
58:32
But can't can't be significant other for?
58:34
Me. No, no, because I would take it.
58:36
And I don't, it's weird. I get why you're saying that,
58:38
but I don't think that I see. I think it's OK, but you're OK.
58:42
Not everybody has this issue, but I have a issue with hurts
58:46
that maybe aren't intended for sure.
58:50
Well, if I ever I have done something that made you feel
58:54
pushed in a hurtful way, I want you to know that it came out of
58:57
the side of the argument that I made, which was like, if your
59:01
goal is to do a certain thing, that's good for you and I want
59:03
to support you and push the boundary to whatever level of
59:07
comfort there is. Like I don't want to be the
59:10
person that pushes you into an uncomfortable zone, but to push
59:13
you in such a way that supports you to achieve whatever goal you
59:16
said. I still think that's OK but now
59:18
I'm worried. Anyway, sorry I jumped in.
59:24
No, that's OK. That's OK.
59:25
I mean that's our battle. And today, I don't know.
59:28
I am hoping that the next time we.
59:32
No, I don't even know. I don't know if we're gonna have
59:35
another prerecorded for you all again on the next one or not,
59:39
but hang in there, we'll be back.
59:41
And for this episode, just like the rest of them, when you're
59:46
done with this, please go into Spotify and vote on the poll.
59:49
Vote for me because we want to be supportive.
59:53
I'm. Supportive.
59:59
And then, you know, share this with your friends and family.
1:00:01
Let's get a discussion going in the new year, yes?
1:00:04
Yes. We'll see you in 2026, people.
1:00:07
Bye. I just want to do my own thing.
1:00:14
I just want to do my own thing. I just want to do my own thing.