Latest / The Jasmine Star Show / 3 Reasons Why People Get Stuck | Interview on The Aww Shift Podcast

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3 Reasons Why People Get Stuck | Interview on The Aww Shift Podcast · The Jasmine Star Show

• 0:13
  Hi friends. Welcome to the Jasmine Star Show.
• 0:16
  My name is Eugenia Wu and I'm the podcast producer for the show.
• 0:20
  Today we have a treat.
• 0:21
  Jasmine was recently interviewed on Anthony Truck's conversation was so good that we just had to share it with you.
• 0:30
  If you don't know Anthony, he's pretty incredible.
• 0:33
  He's a former N F L player turn transformational identity coach, and he focuses on helping people shift their identities to realize the change they want to see in their lives.
• 0:41
  In his conversation with Jasmine, they talk about walking through the fear of creating a business, believing in yourself, and how to hone your mindset for success.
• 0:53
  Let's listen in.
• 0:55
  Hey, hey. Welcome back.
• 0:57
  We're gonna dive right into this cuz obviously you heard who she is in the intro. And uh, I'm excited for this person to unpack their head their hearts because this person is, uh, someone I've watched, uh, in their world of growth over the last few years.
• 1:07
  We were introduced in some cool areas, which obviously you know about.
• 1:10
  So I'm gonna hop right in.
• 1:10
  Jasmine Star, how are you?
• 1:12
  I am doing very well. I'm happy to be here and I'm ready to serve.
• 1:16
  I love it. I love it.
• 1:17
  I'm ready to ask you questions and so we can take that big heart of yours and open up to the world. So I always heard the podcast with one question.
• 1:23
  You could take it wherever you'd like to take it. You could be humble, you could be braggadocious still up to you. But here's the question.
• 1:28
  I'm walking around town, I sit down in this coffee shop, there's a beautiful woman sitting next to me, to you. I don't know you yet, and for some reason you turn to side to star talking to me.
• 1:36
  Why should I listen to you?
• 1:38
  I have the unique ability to hear the story under the story.
• 1:42
  Mm-hmm. That might be in 307 episodes.
• 1:45
  The most precise and quick answer to that question ever. Dang it. You're good.
• 1:49
  I'm already like, oh, okay. She's dope.
• 1:52
  . Uh.
• 1:53
  I like that. So unpack that cuz I, when I hear that, I go, I get what you're saying, right?
• 1:57
  There's certain people when you've been enough conversations mm-hmm.
• 1:59
  , you can see when like their eyes are telling you something different from the mouth. Right? So, so where did that come from? I guess?
• 2:06
  Uh, probably if, I mean, wow, we're starting here. I love this. I love this.
• 2:10
  So I actually didn't realize that this was a source of power for me until adulthood in until entrepreneurship.
• 2:13
  Mm-hmm. .
• 2:16
  But what I realized growing up is I grew up, I am a brown girl, daughter of an immigrant. I grew up obese as a child, really a an introvert.
• 2:25
  I was reading like Warren Peace when I was 11.
• 2:27
  And so I wasn't like the kid that someone's like, But what it really did teach me was the perks of being a wallflower is that you begin to understand and watch, I believe that I'm a professional people watcher so much so that people's mannerisms, the words, the specific words that they use to speak the way that they shape their story and the frame in which they use, like I could within probably five to seven minutes dial in, drill down on who this person is, what drives them, what do they want.
• 2:54
  And so then the questions that I ask, quite honestly, I'm not special.
• 2:57
  I just hold a mirror up to what somebody actually wants and can't find the right words.
• 3:02
  And so then they just feel very seen and known and understood in that moment.
• 3:05
  Yeah. And almost like I feel like it could be creepy too, right?
• 3:07
  because.
• 3:08
  And I Oh, totally. Yeah.
• 3:08
  Oh totally. Absolutely.
• 3:10
  I've done that. I, I, my wife doesn't like when I do this cuz I'll do it and with people I just met.
• 3:14
  Right. And they'll be going through something you can they're carrying, I'll pull it aside.
• 3:17
  Like, Hey, you all right? And like, what, why would you ask that? You can do that? As soon as they ask that, what would you ask that I go, I dunno man, I'm feeling something. And then you, you can get into these conversations.
• 3:26
  So I think that's kinda what you're talking about is sometimes there's just things going on and once you're watching people, cause I grew up in foster care and most of my time was spent analyzing, are these people going to hurt me? And so that, that system never turned off.
• 3:37
  I just use it differently I guess now. But that's, that's powerful.
• 3:39
  So when you find yourself doing that and you kind of going through the process, it helps people. I, I know that you have this different stuff you do.
• 3:45
  How did you get in the realm of this now, right?
• 3:47
  Because that was something you developed as a kid, you kind of use, I, I don't wanna go too far forward, but how did that create the human you are now?
• 3:54
  Well, oftentimes so many of us navigate life without ever being ourselves or actually having the permission to be ourselves because think that we have to act and behave and walk in the world in a certain way.
• 4:05
  Mm-hmm.
• 4:06
  because of the thing that we don't want on like a very primal level is not to be excluded from the tribe.
• 4:10
  And so what we do is we try to act the most like other people so that people, we go unnoticed. And I think to myself, what, what is shame?
• 4:17
  What a shame to walk through life wanting to blend in for fear of being cast out when the very thing that keeps you belonging in a tribe is the value that you bring and the value that you bring is your insights and your experiences and your stories. And oftentimes the most disarming thing, the way that I can quickly get to talking to somebody about the truth of who they are, is to repeat back a word that they used or mirror a body. So I'll never forget having a conversation with a gentleman Yeah.
• 4:42
  And he had said, well if I were to act like an ogre and do that, then suppose that that would be then the case. And I paused and I, I repeated, is there a reason why you used the word ogre and everything shifted? Mm-hmm.
• 4:55
  is that oftentimes we just use words without actually realizing there was a reason why I used that word. Yeah.
• 5:01
  Or framed it that situation because it changes the scope of the world and if we understand the scope of the world in which they're living and it, you pull somebody back from it, it begins to force them to question their own beliefs. Yeah.
• 5:11
  And then all of a sudden you get into a real conversation. Yeah.
• 5:13
  Real conversation right after that.
• 5:14
  I fully agree cuz you, you catch 'em off guard cuz they don't usually have those humans.
• 5:18
  They're into like that one in 10,000 person. Right. Like they, they'd happen across life and all of a sudden it's that one that makes 'em go, oh, like Right. It's a unique experience that, but there's a lot of people that remember you that you don't even remember, if that makes sense. Like mm-hmm. Just over time you've met 'em. Not a bad way, but it's cool. And so you get this thing happening as a kid, you develop this thing, but I'm assuming being a wallflower, it wasn't something you automatically started just walking the world one day and switch that book.
• 5:40
  I'm gonna start asking you a question about the words that you speak. Right.
• 5:42
  What was the transition of going from being a quiet person?
• 5:45
  I just noticed these things to slowly actually being more outgoing and speaking in terms of like sharing, talking maybe we'll call it, um, I dunno catching people in these conversations because I know for me, if I'm a quiet person when I was, I don't wanna talk, I don't wanna share.
• 5:59
  I I don't wanna get an abrasive conversation so I So how did you get out of that bubble?
• 6:04
  You know, Anthony, I don't even think I got out of it. I think I'm still in it.
• 6:08
  So find myself. Oh totally. I, I.
• 6:10
  Talk, I watch your tip talks and I go, I would never do that. I go, listen, she's dope at it, but I can't see myself.
• 6:16
  Doing it. And the crazy thing is, so there's, there's, there's two, there's two distinctions, right?
• 6:21
  There's the girl from the hood who will do whatever it takes to get where you wanna go.
• 6:26
  And then there's the human that realizes that the purpose and power in being a hundred percent who you are.
• 6:31
  Like I would never wake up in the morning and be like, I am so happy to do a TikTok today.
• 6:36
  I am so happy to dance and transition and point, like, that's not me.
• 6:41
  That's not what I like to do. But it is what I will do.
• 6:45
  I will do things other people won't to get results that other people don't.
• 6:49
  Gotcha. Personal belief, neither here nor there.
• 6:51
  And my approach is different than anybody else's approach it and as it should be.
• 6:54
  And what I'm comfortable with other people are not comfortable with. But for all intents and purposes, I would go to an event even if I was like a keynote speaker.
• 7:00
  And I am not the person to go up to anybody. I am never What I find myself is, I've always learned that I will get more, being genuinely interested in two other people than trying to get 2000 people interested in me.
• 7:14
  And it is the people who I talk to on the periphery that are never the ones who are the most captivating, but those who are the most powerful. Yeah. And so, you know, at this time, um, I applied to go through this business program through Stanford.
• 7:27
  It's three months. It's for Latino American business owners.
• 7:30
  And I realize that even in a room of highly qualified, amazing entrepreneurs, I am a hundred percent a wallflower.
• 7:35
  I don't know how to network. But what I do know is I just now this is still to this day. I mean this is homie, this happened like last month. Oh this is like, this is like last month. I'm in Palo Alto, I'm in Stafford at the business school.
• 7:45
  And I realize that I am one of the last people in the lunch line and I realize there's somebody standing in front of me and we got a five minute wait at this point in time, I'm my zone of safety because there's food on the horizon and a five minute timeframe in wish we must do it. Yeah.
• 7:58
  Started a conversation. Lo and behold, I had no idea that this guy was transformative in the later be a mentor.
• 8:08
  That stuff happens when you are not the center of the tension and trying to get other people interested in what it is you do.
• 8:13
  And that still remains a case today.
• 8:15
  I like that. Yeah, no, I get that. I, I find myself doing, I almost like, it was a thing for me and I did in the NFL when I played, is I, would I get to a space I need to understand the space enter it. Ooh. So like the processing of the people. Ooh, ooh. How, you know?
• 8:27
  Cause we're all different and like, you don't wanna be the guy, it's like too much. It's like, ah, cast that guy out or he is too quiet.
• 8:31
  Cast that guy out. Cause if you're too quiet, they don't wanna, you know, it's like scary. What's that guy thinking?
• 8:34
  Little suspicious. It's likes.
• 8:36
  Like the double Dutch of life. Like where do I, lemme see how the ropes going, you know, but, but I, I know that this is something I'm listened and going, man.
• 8:42
  I know there's a lot of people in the same boat, right? They have skills, they have the information. They can do some of the same things, but they've maybe their entire life never done the thing. Like you said, I will do this. Where did the I will come from?
• 8:52
  Was that something like a moment in time?
• 8:54
  Cause I listen to for these a shift moments like the, oh, that's where it happened.
• 8:57
  Was there something as a kid or teenage years or what that got you to go like, I am now going to will myself to do what needs to be done.
• 9:04
  Um, for me it wasn't a transformative moment.
• 9:06
  I did not have the scales come from my eyes. I didn't like, oh, f just keeps sense of self-love and purpose. The sky open in a purple rainbow.
• 9:13
  The sky opened. That's right.
• 9:14
  Like a little unicorn came down the cat mixing on a dj, uh, spinning the ones and twos zero.
• 9:19
  It was just a muscle that I realized of the people who had the thing I wanted and the power in which they possessed.
• 9:26
  I noticed that they would do certain things to get where they were.
• 9:30
  And I thought to myself, am I capable of doing maybe not that?
• 9:33
  Am I capable of doing a little of what they have done?
• 9:36
  And the answer to anyone asking that question is if you're an asking the question, you have the ability.
• 9:43
  It's just whether or not you'd have the courage to deploy against the very thing you desire.
• 9:46
  For me, it wasn't overnight.
• 9:48
  I just realized that every time I exerted a bit of effort, I fell in my face, swallowed my pride, and then continued trying again.
• 9:55
  I just realized that one of the mantras that has carried me through life is I can't lose if I don't quit.
• 9:58
  Mm-hmm. . Yeah.
• 10:00
  So you just have to have a thick enough stomach not to quit.
• 10:03
  And so what people see now is, oh wow, she's built this business or there's a falling on social media or there's a podcast or whatever.
• 10:08
  And I think to myself, that's on the back of so many embarrassing flagrant failures. Yeah.
• 10:14
  And then just realizing, being like owning it, I have always believed like very much like Eminem eight, Mike, what is it?
• 10:20
  The eight mile? Eight mile, yeah. Mile eight mile older he sees me. Ok. Ok.
• 10:23
  Okay. Yeah. And where it's like, one of the reasons why the battles were so effective was because he was calling himself out. Yeah. Before somebody else had the ability to.
• 10:31
  And I just think to myself, you own it on the front end and you get people who wildly love the fact that you are that honest.
• 10:37
  And then you get people who absolutely hate the fact that you are that honest.
• 10:40
  And to both of those, I say welcome. Both of these are needed.
• 10:44
  Yeah. A hundred percent.
• 10:45
  There's a a clip that went out of me in a podcast yesterday and it's one where the, the host grabbed a snippet, uh, like a little snippet of, I'm like, that's the one in my head. I'm like, hope they don't put that like prominent.
• 10:54
  They did. And so I get people that are like, they're, you know, they're just, they're angry. And then some people are like, I love it and I realize this.
• 11:00
  I've been saying it for a long time, I can now use it as an example of if you are not transparent enough for people to dislike you, you'll never be transparent enough for people to love you.
• 11:08
  Ooh.
• 11:09
  Like, they've gotta know who you are.
• 11:09
  And that's how you clarify who you are.
• 11:12
  If you don't go transparent, both those people don't know who you are, it's gray.
• 11:16
  But you gotta cut some out to create that space for the ones that love you.
• 11:18
  So I get that. Now, you, you obviously do a lot of amazing things.
• 11:21
  Can you take us through the journey of building up to where you are now?
• 11:23
  Because at some point you were a beginner.
• 11:23
  I wanna uncover that moment, right?
• 11:27
  Because those who are sitting back going, I wanna live this cool life, I wanna be free. Like you have freedom, you're a wife, you're a mom, you live this cool life, it's out there.
• 11:31
  Right? I look at your life and go, I like how she's living her life.
• 11:34
  Go, you, uh, I like joy as humans, but I know that that wasn't an immediate thing. Right?
• 11:40
  You had to build into that.
• 11:41
  So can you walk us through like where you entered in and what the climb was like?
• 11:45
  Absolutely. And then I'm gonna ask a favor of you. Yeah.
• 11:48
  I feel like in the last 15 years, life has, uh, changed so much. So I'm only here to be of service to listeners.
• 11:56
  So what I'll do is I'll give you a nutshell version life.
• 11:59
  And then we can start tapping around what you think is gonna be like the biggest lever that we can pull. So, um, it's 2000, 2005, 2006. I, like I said, I'm daughter of an immigrant.
• 12:08
  First in my family to go to college and got a full ride scholarship to UCLA law school mm-hmm. .
• 12:12
  And while I was there I was sad, stressed and totally overwhelmed, but I just thought, listen, you got out of the hood baby. Like this is, this is how you get from the east side of Los Angeles to the west side of Los Angeles. And so I was like, this is just what it is that you do.
• 12:24
  Until my mom had a relapse, the brain cancer, my first year of law school.
• 12:27
  And then everything got flipped upside down because she had battled eight years at this time. The doctor said it's head, her time had come.
• 12:32
  And so in addition to being depressed about being in law school, I finally do a deep, deep depression around life, purpose, God, all of those things. And I, on a whim quit law school. Mm.
• 12:43
  And I had three years to go back to reclaim my scholarship, but I had said I need to take a medical leave because I need to be with my mom.
• 12:48
  So there I was 25 years old, I moved back home with my parents and I don't really know which way is up, but all I know is that I want to marry my high school sweetheart. Somebody I'd been dating at this point in time about nine years.
• 12:58
  And I wanted my mom to see us get married. Mm-hmm. . Yeah.
• 13:00
  We planned a wedding in like three months. Doctor said she won't walk, she won't get to where you want this wedding to be. And she did.
• 13:06
  She walked me on the aisle. She was bald, she had facial palsy.
• 13:08
  The day was Baldy and we were on a beach in Hawaii and there was 21 of us.
• 13:11
  And that was when life distinctly changed.
• 13:14
  Because when I came home my husband asked, okay, what are we gonna do about law school?
• 13:16
  And I was sad, tired and depressed.
• 13:20
  And I said, I don't wanna go back there.
• 13:21
  And he asked a singular question that every single time has presented itself in every iteration of my career. He said, if you can do one thing and be happy for the rest of your life, what would it be? And I said, I wanna be a photographer. And he said, okay, you don't have a camera. And I was like, I know , but if I had one, I feel like we could kind of do this thing. And so Christmas, Christmas of that year, he went to Best Buy, bought me a very simple camera and I said, I'm gonna try it for a year and if it doesn't work out, I'll go back to UCLA law school.
• 13:49
  And within the first year I had built a six figure revenue stream Wow.
• 13:53
  On the back of photography. Yeah. Now some people say like, oh, golf clap.
• 13:56
  But I'm like, no, no, no. I was terrible. Like I wasn't good .
• 13:59
  And so people were in a state of disbelief that there was like a girl with no experience, no connections, no funding, no proper photographic education. Yes.
• 14:06
  And here I was doing pretty well for myself on my first year go. Mm-hmm.
• 14:10
  .
• 14:10
  What happened thereafter is I started teaching other photographers how to build better businesses mm-hmm. .
• 14:14
  And then slowly thereafter I started teaching other creatives how to build better businesses. And then I started consulting with medium sized companies.
• 14:21
  And at every iteration of this career, I slowly started realizing I have a skillset of breaking down a big idea into small, really actionable steps.
• 14:28
  So then I started creating digital courses that changed my life, my career, my financial objectives.
• 14:34
  Then created a membership on the back of continuous education.
• 14:38
  And then in 2021 decided to turn the membership into a full on SaaS tech platform to where we empower small business owners with that they need for their business.
• 14:47
  And along the way have documented my journey on my podcast, on my blog on newsletters.
• 14:50
  I just create, create, create and share enough for that.
• 14:54
  People say I really like her, I really can't stand her. Both of.
• 14:59
  Them. Yeah. At the same time, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
• 15:01
  And that's a good thing because, so I think sometimes I can't stand her.
• 15:03
  It is gotta be tied to like, and not that it really can't stand, but like you hold a mirror, right. You're like, whistle is impossible for your life.
• 15:07
  It was, I don't know, going back, um, we have a lot of kindred aspects and I don't even know if you know, um, but my mom passed from ms.
• 15:13
  So like she had a, you know, an autoimmune disease that took her life. Mm-hmm. Uh, my high school sweetheart and I, we are married, we got divorced for three years, got remarried, we got married in Hawaii.
• 15:22
  I remember this. I remember this. Yeah, I remember.
• 15:24
  This. What, which island did you get married on outta curiosity?
• 15:27
  We got married on Oahu, right on Diamond Head. Okay. Okay. And then we uh, honeymoon in Maui. So we're on the West coast. We're in, we're in Newport Beach.
• 15:35
  So we fly out from la.
• 15:37
  I'm in the San Francisco Bay area.
• 15:38
  Okay. Okay. Okay.
• 15:39
  So now though it feels like Maui's more our island because it's like where we honeymoon. Yeah. It just kind of changes our relationship. So Maui's, Maui's the island.
• 15:46
  Yeah. Where'd you marry?
• 15:48
  We can, we gotta Gary married on uh, con Poly Beach, uh, in Maui. Yeah.
• 15:52
  Was actually the Saint Mary. Yeah. We, I, I, we live in California. I went, I'm a Pac 12 now guy, but I went to University of Oregon, my wife. So it's, it's crazy. It's, there's the main aspects that are kindred.
• 16:01
  Mm-hmm now. Uh, I wanna go back to what you, all the things you just listened cuz here I'm gonna tell you the truth.
• 16:05
  I hear that. And the old Anthony, my heart stops at the thought of all the things you talked about doing and a year what you created, what some people can't do in 10.
• 16:14
  And we kind of alluded this prior to the phone call and I think this is the best place to dig in cuz as opposed to picking each piece apart, I wanna pick apart the top that created that. Which is the mentality, the mind behind it all.
• 16:22
  Not many people will go, I'm gonna get a camera and start telling people to pay me money and I'm a movie like a novice at it.
• 16:28
  Mm-hmm. .
• 16:30
  So where did this mentality and mind come from?
• 16:33
  Mindset come from that goes, I'm going to actually create something and, and ask people to pay me because I'm that good.
• 16:38
  Cuz a lot of people are phenomenal at stuff but are so deathly afraid of creating a business that creates freedom from it.
• 16:44
  Hmm.
• 16:44
  I actually had a conversation about this with my husband and he had asked me why of all things did you look at photography and think that is the thing I could do when up until that point in my life, Anthony, I would look at everything and say I would want to do that but I can't.
• 17:04
  I would want to do that.
• 17:04
  And then I am not able, I would want to do that for the first time.
• 17:08
  As I went through the journey of choosing a photographer for my wedding, I realized that I was not making an intellectual business decision.
• 17:17
  I wasn't even making a logical decision. Mm-hmm. , I was making a hundred percent emotional decision for an emotional transaction.
• 17:23
  Mm-hmm. .
• 17:24
  And it was in that moment whether or not I realized it then, but it's clearly looking back at that as I was like, I will lose playing the talent game.
• 17:29
  I will lose playing the marketing game.
• 17:34
  I will lose in the business game. I can win on the emotional game. Hmm. Yeah.
• 17:39
  And it was the first time that I flexed that muscle in understanding that I had the ability to connect with people on a human to human level.
• 17:46
  And then I quickly distilled that at the time I was working part-time for my daddy's church. Yeah. So I didn't make a lot of money.
• 17:53
  So the risks were really low.
• 17:53
  I just thought to myself, well if I can book five clients, if I can emotionally connect with somebody who believes in my capacity to do a very simple thing on a very special day, I just needed five to match what I was making at my daddy's church. Yeah.
• 18:05
  Like I said, not a lot of money. Mm-hmm. .
• 18:07
  So the minute I was able to book the clients, I was then officially in business. And so I didn't actually have to ask people to make a transaction.
• 18:17
  What I had to do was to appeal to an emotional aspect for an emotional decision. And every single iteration thereafter has, can I connect with somebody's deepest desire and showcase a transformation, showcase a result. If I do that, then I don't have to ask for a sale.
• 18:35
  I simply have to make an offer. Mm.
• 18:36
  And then they decide based on the equity that had built up up until that time, that then they say this is the right answer.
• 18:42
  I know that there are a multitude of other options out there, but I choose this person to take me where I wanna go for that transformation.
• 18:49
  It's big. I mean it's, it's a very interesting direction to take cuz most people don't think that deep into it. Right. It you had to though at some point. Cuz I'm sitting there going, do we think about it after a deering?
• 18:57
  And it had to have been deering cuz in the real time of it, that's the only thing I can imagine would've made you move.
• 19:02
  Cause it wouldn't have been logic would, like you said, it would've been talent.
• 19:04
  So it's like, man, that's a crazy thing to unpack and make sense of and move forward.
• 19:08
  How was it in the first, like, I won't say this five wasn't the first five is my guess, right? , how did you handle the, the people that are like, ah, what are you doing?
• 19:17
  Those who said no, uh, you don't have any experience.
• 19:19
  How did you go through the journey of getting those five?
• 19:22
  Because a lot of people said would've said, I got, I gotta get to five.
• 19:24
  And they would've tried it for one and and fell off cuz they didn't get the first one. What was that journey like of getting those five?
• 19:30
  I love this question because I have to tell you it was, I, what, what is it?
• 19:33
  Is it, is it idiocy? Is it uh, courage?
• 19:37
  Is it somewhere in between? So like I said, I was working for my daddy's church.
• 19:41
  My dad is a pastor in East Los Angeles with a sizable church.
• 19:45
  And I thought to myself, nepotism at its finest, let me offer my services for free to people who would say no to free. Yeah. And lo and behold a lot of people said no, because when you offer something for free, it really isn't free because their time is worth something. Yeah.
• 19:59
  And if they don't think their time is worth what it is you want to do, you will always get a no, I always got nos.
• 20:05
  I think it's at that point in time where somebody would say, yeah, that's not for me.
• 20:08
  I can't take this.
• 20:10
  And it isn't until later that I realized that there was a thing that was going on with how I was processing, which is what I strongly tell people to this day.
• 20:18
  There is three reasons why people will stop in business.
• 20:21
  And number one is money.
• 20:23
  They have a hard time asking for money because they feel like it's a charitable donation or they feel like somebody's being benevolent because they don't actually believe that's a choice and a decision. Secondly is denial.
• 20:32
  People have a hard time saying no receiving a no. Yeah.
• 20:35
  Because they don't receive the no as a no to the offer They receive, receive the no as a no to them as a human. Yeah. And then lastly, it's belief that even though you really love your product and your service, you love your business, you actually are not, not a hundred percent sure that somebody couldn't else get something cheaper, faster, better. And so these three things are the negative narrative that we keep in our minds as business owners.
• 20:56
  And I thought to myself, when I looked back at that person, I actually didn't have any of that because number one, I was offering something that was really, really, really low in cost.
• 21:04
  So I was like, uh, I'm okay making this offer. Mm-hmm. , then the denial, it was easy for me to separate the two easy because I'm just like, yeah, if you don't like me no problem.
• 21:12
  Like I can keep on moving on.
• 21:15
  And maybe that was just like the grit Yeah. In being a kid. And I did believe.
• 21:18
  Not everybody loves Jesus. It's okay. .
• 21:20
  Exactly. Exactly. So, you know, for me, having the distinction of stupidity, naivety or whatever the case may be, my only options Anthony, was make it work or go back to the place where you felt dead on the inside. I chose the, I mean, that was it.
• 21:38
  That's the way to do it, man.
• 21:38
  Because that's a drivethrough.
• 21:40
  It's funny you ask that because like you say that cuz there's a lot of people that ask me like, what was the thing that made you believe in yourself that you can go play football? When I was a kid, I go nothing.
• 21:46
  I just knew that if I didn't do anything, I don't get anything more.
• 21:49
  So that was it. Like, I better, better going . You know?
• 21:52
  So there's these three things to talk about, right?
• 21:53
  There's the aspect of asking for money, there's the aspect of denial, right?
• 21:56
  Judgment and, and rejection. And then there's aspect of belief.
• 21:59
  How could someone who doesn't have the, we'll call it the in natal developed skills that you have from that, how do they step in that? How does somebody push past and ask for money?
• 22:06
  How do they push past the no? How do they develop the belief in themselves?
• 22:10
  So, um, getting, no, it's a muscle. I don't wanna ever come across and be like, it's easy for people to say no to me.
• 22:15
  It's not. It's really not. But it's, we hear it enough, it removes the sting.
• 22:21
  So if you're so worried about people saying no, I always suggest role play with your friends, give an offer and have your friends say no.
• 22:27
  And then you have to come back and say, but how do we get to a why you strengthen your skills by being told no.
• 22:32
  So my very first job, I was a telemarketer for farmer's insurance. Oh really?
• 22:36
  You'll never get told no more than a telemarketer. Farmer's insurance.
• 22:40
  Let me tell you, . So all of a sudden I like day, like literally day after day I was in high school.
• 22:43
  I needed money if I wanted to do anything.
• 22:43
  My parents were like, we love you, but you gotta find money to do the things that you want. So five days a week I sat for three hours every day after school and I called and all people said was no. And all of a sudden I just realized, I'm like, I can survive. Like, no.
• 22:56
  Doesn't kill you. Yeah.
• 22:56
  And so then you strengthen your skills and how to receive the no.
• 22:59
  And then when it comes to asking for a sale mm-hmm. for me, I i I kind of, there's like nuance. I don't ask for a sale. I make an offer.
• 23:06
  Okay.
• 23:06
  And that allows emotional distance to like how many times a day do we say no?
• 23:10
  Yeah. Like, no, I don't wanna watch that Netflix. No, I don't want that meal.
• 23:13
  No, I don't wanna go there.
• 23:14
  But it's not anything against like the show on Netflix, the food or the location.
• 23:16
  Yeah. It's really like, that's not where I'm at right now. So I just simply put a distance between that and the belief is mm-hmm.
• 23:21
  , I simply state the truth.
• 23:24
  There is somebody better cuter, wiser, faster, and cheaper that will sell the very thing that I am offering. I am.
• 23:32
  But one of dozens of options. Yeah.
• 23:34
  But the thing that nobody else has is the way that I see the world and the way that I present things. You present that to somebody. If it's an alignment, it's a yes. If it's not an alignment, it's a no. We continue moving forward.
• 23:44
  It's a good thing you get to to 99 nos before you ever get to a yes.
• 23:47
  It is. It sound boils down. I mean that's seriously what it turns into.
• 23:49
  And its to those who can weather the storm, I think album my businesses exact same way. There's something to this, uh, this thing you're talking through that I really like the viewpoint, we'll call it on, it's almost like this, it's important but not so important that, that it will break me if this dis I'm gonna like feel how you're, because the, as I feel like it's a golden thread behind all of this is like, whether it's asking for money, whether it's the belief of myself, whether it's denial, it's like it's not who I am.
• 24:12
  This is just who I am trying to put this thing out into the world. And I think, like you said, if you can separate yourself from the thing you're doing, it's a humongous like relief.
• 24:20
  And then it's like I can keep trying without failing cuz I'm not failing.
• 24:24
  I'm actually improving. Is that, does that make sense?
• 24:26
  A hundred percent. It makes sense.
• 24:26
  You said it much better than I did.
• 24:28
  Did I say it again? I was like, you're like a professional podcaster or something. No, you said it right.
• 24:32
  , the golden thread was separating ourselves from the thing that we do so that we don't have an emotional connection to somebody's denial or lack of belief.
• 24:40
  Yeah. Yeah. There we go. You said it better than I did. See that. That works.
• 24:44
  You just tightened up even more . And, and this, this is a thought process thing. This is a mentality, this is a mindset, right?
• 24:50
  And mm-hmm. .
• 24:51
  And I know we talk a lot about mindset and it's funny, we were just kind of mentioning in programs where this of a lot of people's worlds now. Cause I think there is mm-hmm. , there's more, uh, I wanna say trickling into the mentality of most people just on surely being on social media comparison. The market's too big, I can't enter that.
• 25:06
  That the brain becomes our biggest problematic tool becomes our our greatest enemy, right? Mm-hmm.
• 25:10
  , how have you in the, I guess recent months or years kind of dove in a notice and looked at the mindset of people or even of yourself and the success that's tied to it.
• 25:19
  So I read a book a few years ago that had a radical shift in how I did business. I look back at like, what was like some really big tipping points.
• 25:28
  And it was this particular year that I read this particular book. Okay.
• 25:31
  And it was called Mindset by Dr. Carol dw. And yeah, I got it. Like the, okay, so it's like the most basic, basic, basic is like, there's, there's two types of people.
• 25:38
  Growth mindset, limited mindset.
• 25:41
  And you're born fixed. Fixed. Yeah. Yes.
• 25:41
  Fixed. You're born. But it can change.
• 25:46
  I read the book and I realized through and through Anthony, I am not fixed.
• 25:50
  I oozed fixed, my foundation was fixed. My, my buildings, my emotions, my structures fixed, fixed, fixed.
• 25:57
  I was the kid who toppled the monopoly game. I don't play games, I don't win .
• 26:02
  It is first or nothing like Yeah. In what I realized that that was the greatest disservice that I can do to myself.
• 26:08
  And it was at that time where I started realizing you're playing small to win.
• 26:13
  What if you set out to play games, you are unqualified to play.
• 26:17
  Understanding it is highly unlikely that you won't win.
• 26:21
  But losing at a bigger game is better than winning at the world's smallest one.
• 26:25
  Mm-hmm. .
• 26:25
  Mm-hmm , I, Everything expanded. And it is still a challenge every single day.
• 26:31
  And now that I have a daughter, it's crazy. I never thought this, I was like this Dr. Carol Swick, I'm not sure if you're born this way.
• 26:37
  I look at my daughter Anthony and this girl is growth mindset. I, I'm just, she's teaching me. I often say, you know, God gives you the child to teach you the lessons you need to learn. I was like, oh my God.
• 26:47
  She's the complete opposite of everything I've ever been raised and how I acted.
• 26:51
  And I look at her and I'm like, I need to be more like her. Yeah.
• 26:54
  And it's just been such a, a cool experience.
• 26:56
  How'd she get that way though?
• 26:56
  Because I got these three kids.
• 26:58
  They do some of the same stuff and I'm always curious of what my, cuz here's my belief. My belief is the person I become.
• 27:04
  Like the whole goal is I'm starting my kids, uh, way ahead of where I started.
• 27:08
  Mm-hmm. now isn't in that place that you weren't closed. Mm-hmm.
• 27:10
  But I pushed. So like they, they go out and do things that are beyond what I would've ever done at their age. And I'm assuming like it has to be cuz they saw me do stuff.
• 27:18
  Mm. I don't know Anthony. So, uh, I don't know if I shared this part of the journey. Uh, we adopted our daughter in 2020. Mm. Nice.
• 27:27
  It was such a powerful experience.
• 27:29
  And every parent meets their child differently.
• 27:33
  And I can't explain it to you, I cannot explain it to you. I opened the door.
• 27:37
  So they brought her to a hotel where we did the placement.
• 27:41
  We opened the door to the hotel and the gentleman who brought her, she was in a carrier. And I, till this day will take it to my grave, that when they opened the door, what I felt was a whoosh of power.
• 27:52
  I can't explain what this thing was.
• 27:52
  She was an aura. She was a thing.
• 27:56
  She was this powerful creature. And I feel Anthony, candidly speaking, I feel like I'm powerful. I do. I feel like I'm, and then I realized I met her.
• 28:04
  You are, oh Anthony, you meet this girl And every mom is biased. I am biased, but I am telling you she has this thing about her and I am so happy that she is of my heart and soul, but she's not of my body.
• 28:16
  Cuz I would doubt that I have the capacity to create this force of nature.
• 28:20
  She is a godsend. She is blessed how she got to us.
• 28:25
  Any other child would've fallen by the waya and this girl rose, rose from the ashes.
• 28:31
  Hmm. It's beautiful.
• 28:31
  It's big. That's, I mean, that's a necessity for her life cuz she's gonna be around amazing humans.
• 28:36
  But I think it's good because then what happens is, as you called her, the greater thing that you know, she's capable of, she's actually gonna enter 'em easier.
• 28:40
  I would say with more open arms.
• 28:43
  I think whenever you have the, the opposite is difficult. Cause I, I know as parents, like I'm a parent. I, I'm thankful I learned this early as like I did my thing.
• 28:50
  I don't have to live vicarious. So I, I don't want for more, sorry.
• 28:54
  I don't want more for my kids than they want for themselves. Amen.
• 28:57
  And so it creates this, this space where I can believe I love the, the parenting journey man. And you're just getting started on it. Oh, I know.
• 29:04
  . Bless my heart. .
• 29:06
  This is gonna be a complete sidetrack from this is, what are your thoughts on?
• 29:10
  So there's, I guess we'll call it two schools of thoughts. Two situations.
• 29:13
  One is have kids young. Uh, and then you build with them, which I think is a little harder.
• 29:17
  Or you have kids later in life because you've been established.
• 29:20
  You can create like an easier, smoother life. I, I had kids young and the, the thing that I look at is I get to spend more years alive with my kids alive cuz I had 'em younger.
• 29:29
  So it's kind of fun.
• 29:31
  But it was difficult building a business and a marathon. Cuz at the same time, obviously you're in the sides. You're in, what are, what are your thoughts like comparison between the two?
• 29:38
  This is gonna be off the cup. I don't even know where this came from, but throwing it out there too to you.
• 29:41
  I love it. I love this conversation.
• 29:42
  But specifically because there are so many women who are straddling the line regardless of age of career and motherhood and partnership.
• 29:50
  And I look back at it and I wouldn't do anything different, anything different.
• 29:54
  Are there days that I mourn the, the lack of time that I would have with her later in life? Absolutely.
• 30:00
  Are there times that I'm like, oh God, please, may I be around for this child to have a child? Like that is the prayer.
• 30:07
  I don't know what that looks like, but I have zero regrets. We were, I am so happy that we waited as long as we waited against our desires, we wanted to adopt earlier.
• 30:16
  We started that journey and we were on the journey for three years and it was long and it was painful and it was arduous, aimed everything that we thought we needed. It was the complete opposite.
• 30:24
  And it wasn't until we relinquished our desires in control that we were replaced with the absolute perfect person missing puzzle piece in our family.
• 30:31
  I would do it all the same all over again.
• 30:33
  Like it was the later in life that empowered us to is just entirely different from the struggled of the path that both of us pursued to get here.
• 30:42
  Yeah, I get that too.
• 30:43
  Cause my kids definitely went through some struggle with us. You know, and I, this is never the thing is I wouldn't change anything either.
• 30:48
  And it's like chicken of the egg with this one, right? Oh, what I might have found a new chicken of the egg .
• 30:52
  Like accidentally how is the journey of infusing this new soul into your family?
• 30:56
  Worked with the career you have, the marriage, you know, the, all this stuff going on.
• 31:00
  Cause they know that's one of the things a lot of people who have kids later or don't at all. They go, man, I when do I get to this point in business?
• 31:06
  At this point in business, at this point in life? Um, what are your thoughts like the mixture of those things?
• 31:10
  Well, I don't, I I, I really am very cautious about how I speak about it because everybody's on their own journey. I don't think there's a right or a wrong way.
• 31:18
  I will just say that, you know, I do things that maybe a lot of people won't do in order for me to live the type of life that I want. And so whenever I say I wake up at four 30 in the morning, people automatically repel. They're like, that's impossible for me.
• 31:31
  I would never advocate that for anybody.
• 31:34
  It is what I do because I can put in work before she's awake so that I have the time and latitude in the day to be present as a mom.
• 31:43
  And then my husband, who is my co-founder, business partner, he's taking a very big lead in her life in the middle of the day.
• 31:51
  That empowers me to say like, when this door is shut, like at the time of this recording podcast, my door is shut.
• 31:56
  And if the door is shut, it means I am, you know, I'm in steel mode and I'm in go mode.
• 32:01
  And that clear distinction is not easy for many people.
• 32:04
  I know I'm afforded a luxury, but for me it is a line of distinction.
• 32:07
  Like I'm in work mode and then I'm in mom mode. There's, I, I just, I have a hard time straddling the two if they're mixed.
• 32:13
  No, I get it. I, I think for me, I'm kinda the same way. I, I call it season of dad right now.
• 32:17
  Like I have my son when of'em off and I got two more.
• 32:19
  I think he tel do it in the next six years. And my youngest son, he is my, he is God's gift to me because of the crazy kid I was, I'll call it that . And it's fun though, like it's a journey up and down.
• 32:30
  We do stuff, uh, like my morning, it starts at five 30, then at six 30 to 7, 7 10 we do a whole morning routine together. A little hike, gratitude, prayer, ice bath for two minutes, then a meditation.
• 32:40
  And he is off the day Okay. When I get in. Okay. Okay. Yeah. We, we dial it in.
• 32:44
  But it's, it's, it's effort, energy. And so I, I enter mix the two in that aspect, but I'm the same like doors closed. I need to do this thing so I can be heavily present when it's time. Now I wanted to touch on these points because this, this is an experience of life that I'm sure people who look at you who are called followers of yours, they go, man, I I appreciate her life.
• 33:01
  I can see myself having part of that.
• 33:02
  And I wanna bring it back to the aspect of the career that you've created for yourself, right? Because you went from saying, I wanna do this. For me, I wanna build a life of freedom, of joy, of, you know, peace and of of income and for myself. And over time you said, I want to create this for other people. So what is the, what is the thing you hope to create for the people who come across your work and your products, your program and everything in terms of what their life could be?
• 33:26
  I don't think it's the great answer, but it's just the answer that is like the truest version of why I do the work that I do is I was 26 years old and I never in my entire life ever met a single person who ever had a business. I didn't know it.
• 33:39
  Like there was so far out from our realm where in our neighborhood gardeners and cooks and house cleaners lived that like my biggest aspiration was to drive a Toyota Corolla and wear pumps and a leather briefcase and be somebody's secretary. That was my dream. Yeah.
• 33:50
  I couldn't, I didn't know the world, anything bigger than that.
• 33:53
  Mm-hmm. .
• 33:55
  And so all of a sudden when I saw how big the world was and how the internet democratized the way that people showed up, that the internet leveraged the playing field for the unqualified to work their way into qualification mm-hmm. . And And so now all I want to do is to tell people that the very thing you want to do is on the other side of consistency.
• 34:16
  Mm-hmm. , that's it. Mm-hmm.
• 34:19
  , the very thing you want you to know, no, it might not be as big as you want, might not make as much money as you want.
• 34:24
  But if you are doing this thing full-time, part-time or side hustle and it is allowing you a to another, my God, you are robbing yourself, your family, the universe.
• 34:36
  Y the very thing you have been put on this world to do, there is somebody who needs the thing that you are wildly passionate about.
• 34:42
  I do not care if it's smurf memorbilia, I don't care if it's fan of football, I don't care if it's homeschooling mom curriculum. There's somebody who needs the thing that you are here to provide.
• 34:49
  If you just had the courage to go out, create the way that you connect with people. Be consistent. Make an offer, remain unattached to whether or not they say yes or no.
• 35:01
  Continuously iterate after you fall on your face again and again and again.
• 35:05
  And when you reach your love of success, even if that is just, I am going to put my child in private school, I am going to take my family on a Disney cruise.
• 35:13
  I am going to save up my child's education.
• 35:16
  And all of that is coming on tiny little increments.
• 35:18
  Why would you not do that?
• 35:22
  And the answer often comes from of what people will do, say or think. Hmm. Sure. And to me, the option is so clear, Anthony.
• 35:30
  It is either you will do what you love on your own terms.
• 35:36
  When people have an opinion, say things and give unsolicited advice.
• 35:41
  Or you will not do the thing that you have been put on this earth because of what people will think, say, or do. I simply choose.
• 35:48
  And who I attract and who I speak up for are the people who never had the courage to speak up for themselves.
• 35:52
  And I say, I am the most unqualified, I am unrefined, I am uneducated, I am unqualified.
• 35:59
  I had no business starting a business and I started one and my life changed.
• 36:02
  Would you like to experience that change? Yeah.
• 36:05
  That's the only people I speak to.
• 36:06
  I Beautiful. I'm gonna do this right here. So that's a whole cheer. Yay.
• 36:11
  Oh, what you, this is a high budget podcast. Sound effects. Come on.
• 36:14
  We got some things man. I rarely use this one. I might do it for the first time.
• 36:18
  You ready for this one? I rarely ever use, but on that one we're gonna do this.
• 36:22
  Oh shit. Oh, . Wait, hold on.
• 36:22
  But here's the thing, here's the thing.
• 36:27
  You know, I, I'm Mexican in Puerto Rican. Do you have a laser horn?
• 36:29
  Like do we have a w.
• 36:31
  I don't. I don't. Oh, you should have that one.
• 36:33
  I need, you need to sponsor it. I was just like, you know, the B was in the house.
• 36:36
  Need a laser horn. Let's, let's have your fancy people lay that down.
• 36:41
  . There you go. .
• 36:41
  That's, that's, I love that.
• 36:44
  Cause there's so much to, uh, it's funny, if somebody, first off you guys go back and re-listen to that cuz that's the one where you're not just speaking from a space of what you've said 17 times that was actually pouring straight from the heart. That's the truth. It's, it's this thing, when you tap into it, you, you are reliving as you're talking about it, what your life is, what you went through, through that.
• 37:02
  So you guys re-listen to that.
• 37:03
  But there is so much truth to the aspect of you just, you gotta go.
• 37:07
  And people have heard this before, right? They, but there's always these things where we will create road bumps.
• 37:11
  We'll create these things. I wonder this, but I don't know this, but I don't know this. Yeah, but you don't, but imagine when you do, that one's gone. Cause the next one, I don't know this Okay, measuring you do, that one's gone.
• 37:19
  And then eventually they get removed little by little by little.
• 37:21
  And what you're saying is, look, hey, on top of that, like I'm gonna help you remove some before you even know they're coming up, I'm gonna show you how to do this.
• 37:27
  Cause that's why you've created what you've created in life.
• 37:29
  And so at this point in time, like your mom, your uh, wife, you have this business you're running genuinely.
• 37:34
  Like what are you trying to create for the backend When your daughter is 16 and she comes home from, you know, we'll call high school and she's looking at your life, what do you want your life experience to be like?
• 37:44
  Because I know if I'm looking at the, the trajectory of how you've iterated over time and that much time something new's gonna come across, it just has to, you can't see the same person. Right?
• 37:52
  What, what is your heart pulling towards in the long run?
• 37:56
  Oh, that my ceiling becomes her floor.
• 37:56
  That she comes home and she's able Yeah.
• 38:01
  You know, to see that she will have road bumps and she will have doubt.
• 38:07
  And there's a group of people who actively make the decision every day to do things that they are not prepared for. Yeah.
• 38:14
  That if she were to come home and see her mom do things in spite of fear, if she could see her dad support her and be a soft place to land and say, you will do it on your own and you are going to fall, but just like your mom and just like your dad, you will get up again.
• 38:32
  You will get up again. I don't care, Anthony, if it, it is a house by the water in a zip code that you see on television shows.
• 38:40
  I don't care if it's an apartment because that is where we started, that's where we've been. We adopted her when we were living in an apartment.
• 38:47
  There was a lot of things in her life that she could look back to and say despite it all mm-hmm. They continued to rise. Yeah.
• 38:54
  And that's Maya Angelou shout out to the queen. Hey con, you know, still I rise.
• 38:59
  Good. Yeah. If that's what she comes home to and that is our home motto. I, I think I will have done a good job as.
• 39:04
  A mom. I know you will have. I think that's kind of the thing I do too, is I, it's something to be said.
• 39:09
  Like I've done American Ninja Warrior and hit a buzzer. My kids got to see, like, my kids all have never, they have no memories of me playing professional sports. Their friends go, you're playing your dad play. Can I get a ball? My kids don't care.
• 39:20
  They're like, wait, wait, wait. My dad's side, what are you talking about? He, this is my dad. Right?
• 39:22
  And I go, so in my life, a lot of what I wanna do is the same thing. I want my kids to start vastly, you know, far ahead of where I did.
• 39:30
  But I realize I have to be a guy that's continuously chasing and I gotta be someone that's cool, right?
• 39:35
  There's something to being a cool mom and a cool dad in the sense of they'll listen to me. Or like when they're friends, like they look online, they go, that's your dad. Like that's cool. And I, yeah, I feel good. I'm not gonna lie, but part of it goes, now my kids understand what's They can push farther past that. Cuz I, there's something to be said about being a kid that has a cool mom or dad in the aspect of it leaves me in a space where like I feel confident to step into something new.
• 40:00
  And so I feel like not only are you creating that for you and you've done it, you'll keep pressing on so your daughter can go on, ma'am, my mom's dope. Right.
• 40:06
  But also other people to create it for their own life and press out.
• 40:09
  Oh, Anthony, like, here's the thing, homie like you, you, you goals like you goals with a z at the end I am such a nerd.
• 40:16
  I will never be called, my daughter will never look at me like my mom is cool.
• 40:19
  You think that she like my mom? No, no, no, no, no, no. Homie like legit, she'll be like, you do what you do.
• 40:23
  Talks like, like, like a monster. I'm just sitting, I'm saying like this dope tos I'm thinking it's cool.
• 40:27
  So I dunno what you're talking about.
• 40:28
  Yes. But you know what, when you're a kid that's embarrassing. Nah.
• 40:31
  She'd be like, my mom is embarrassing me, I guess. And I, I think that at the end of way, like if she could look at that and be like, my mom is a nerd and she's still eye by people.
• 40:39
  I'll find my face in the world too.
• 40:39
  So cool or nerd, whatever. Yeah.
• 40:42
  I think our kids are gonna end up at the same place because they see their parents doing the thing. Yeah.
• 40:46
  They see the parents doing the thing that other people don't have the courage to do.
• 40:49
  That. That I thing is a thing where I say cool and I, my kids have, I had 'em see me on stage. Like it's just, I don't want 'em to be like, my dad's this, but it's just like, man, like, okay, my dad's. And I think that, here's why I think it's important. It's because now my son's in college 17, he calls me and his mom like ev every day, every day we get a call or face my, oh, he feels in the day and it feels real good. And I go, that's only because he feels like, like we're cool people to call and talk to.
• 41:11
  You know, like there's something to the weight of us as Hume.
• 41:14
  And that's from all the years of building and fighting and doing the crate.
• 41:16
  If I was a dude, you know, that was, wasn't doing anything that he saw as cool.
• 41:20
  And I'm not gonna say that what you have to do is what I do, but there's a, a certain aspect to being there. I don't think he calls the same matter, to be quite honest. Mm-hmm. , I hear different stories about kids when they take off of like, I haven't heard from 'em for a week. I'm like, I don't know what that experience is like, but I try to do dope stuff so he'll call me.
• 41:34
  Anthony. It's like, to me, when you talk about parental success, and we all have different versions of that, there are some parents would be like, that's too much for me. But I hear that.
• 41:42
  I'm like, that's my version of success.
• 41:44
  If my daughter went away to college and she were able to call me five minutes a day, I would think I did it right. Like I won. Yeah. So now that you said it, and it is possible, I'm like baby girl, my goal is to have make you irresistibly, call your mom every day.
• 41:57
  That would be a win. Yeah. That would be the win. I'm winning that life.
• 42:00
  I, I think it's a win.
• 42:01
  I tell people I want my kids to want to come home for the holidays. I said, however it works. Whatever I did is all the relationship, how I established the conversations we had, I take private time with them.
• 42:10
  And I, I think that the ability for me to do it, it comes because I don't do things.
• 42:15
  I don't have a career where I'm gone all the time. And even if I did, I don't have a career that takes my soul from me to when I come home in a, in a bad mood. Mm-hmm. , because you can have a nine to five job and do that and still spend amazing time, but if that job drains you mm-hmm. agree, you don't have anything for the kids.
• 42:26
  Right. Agreed. On top of that, like, I got a double thing.
• 42:29
  Like I got this career that gives me so much free time and it fills me up.
• 42:33
  So I'm always in like good moods.
• 42:34
  I think it's something people can crave for themselves.
• 42:36
  Even what you're talking about, you don't care if you're gonna teach people how to paint snails, like go do that. Mm-hmm. , but do it amazingly. Mm-hmm.
• 42:41
  and it'll be fine. Mm-hmm. .
• 42:42
  Mm-hmm . Amen. Yeah.
• 42:44
  I like it. I've really enjoyed the, the thoughts that you have.
• 42:46
  I didn't know that we had so many like kindred aspects there.
• 42:49
  It's kind of cool to unpack em and get to know you. Uh, I do have a final que well, two questions. First question is, where can I send people to get in touch, pay attention, follow all the good stuff that you do.
• 42:58
  Hmm. Thank you so much.
• 42:59
  Jasmine star.com and Jasmine star on all social platforms.
• 43:03
  Beautiful. One R by the way, people, I put two R and I couldn't find her.
• 43:06
  .
• 43:08
  Uh, but look, and I was doing my research and I was like, this not, it sounds like a, maybe you're a two star kind of personality. Bla that's a, that's a two r kind of personality. No.
• 43:15
  Baby, I'm a five star.
• 43:15
  Come on, come on. I'm a.
• 43:17
  Five star man. My bad. Ok.
• 43:19
  Two, two R Shoestar. No, no, no. Yeah.
• 43:22
  throw the laughter in there for that one. Cause that was a bad one.
• 43:24
  I got all these little buttons.
• 43:24
  I gotta use the buttons.
• 43:26
  . Well, I'm happy. I'm happy that I get, I get this down to X. Nobody.
• 43:29
  Else has, uh, maybe one of the person has, I don't know. My brain just, I come put these on. Second question, final question. Uh, if I look at all the world of what people are, there's always something we have as a gift to the world. So I'm gonna ask you, what promise did God make to the world? Would he created you?
• 43:45
  Yeah. I will be a reminder that you are enough.
• 43:48
  That what you do is enough and who you are is enough and what you say is enough and your best efforts pale in comparison to how people perceive you while you're so consumed. Wondering how you will ever get it done.
• 43:58
  There are people who are looking at you appreciating how hard you're working to pave the way for them.
• 44:03
  Yeah. I like that. That's a powerful one to land on.
• 44:06
  Cause I know we're talking about all these different things and I don't want someone to sit here and go, well, I'm not doing what they're doing. Am I enough?
• 44:11
  Because that is never the case, to be quite honest.
• 44:13
  I believe you are always someone to someone you may not even know that someone or that someone could be your dog at the house. I don't know what it is, but the, if you realize that, then it's like, live the fullest, broadest depth of who you are without the comparison.
• 44:26
  And you may you carry a cool life. Your life could be damn amazing in time. Mm.
• 44:31
  Agreed.
• 44:32
  I like it. Thank you. Seriously.
• 44:34
  I know you're a busy CEO o running your thing and I, you got to come and hang out. So I appreciate your time. Uh, and I'm, I'm looking forward to, to following more of the stuff you do. I do.
• 44:41
  I watch little TikTok, I'm like, oh, that's how you meant the transition thing.
• 44:44
  And you put the words here. I'm not even kidding with you. I, I'm trying to figure out stuff out.
• 44:47
  Cause I don't have the preemptive desire to be on social in that manner.
• 44:51
  It's like I find like weird thoughts and I'll throw 'em up random and my team's like, can you do more?
• 44:54
  I'm like, I'd like to, but you better call me every time you need me to do it.
• 44:58
  Cuz I don't think of it sometimes.
• 45:00
  Well, is you okay? So I mean it's all about action Anthony.
• 45:03
  It is like if you were to put on your calendar tomorrow that you are going to take a distillation of one thing you learned from the day before and you put it out in less than 30 seconds, I do think that we are kind of like a boomerang effect away from a lot of the trending pointing stuff. And that you as a thought leader, you as a strong black man who's very articulate and is there to empower people.
• 45:23
  If you were to share 30 seconds of one lesson you learned the day before, you can record it. Yeah. You could put it out. You don't need anything fancy.
• 45:30
  You add a little bit of text and it's done. Yeah.
• 45:33
  And it's not just a thing to do.
• 45:33
  It's extending your impact in the.
• 45:36
  World. Yeah. Oh, I do it all the time. I do it.
• 45:38
  I just don't think to do it all the time. That's the thing. It's all, I'll pull my phone up and I don't even have been on Instagram today. I'm like, oh, I forgot to be on that thing. So I'm there. I do, I did one a couple days ago. I was, I was, I took off in ways I didn't think it would. I'm like, ah, people like that.
• 45:49
  So I do that. I just, it's that I, here's explain it, I explain it this way when my kid's up in the morning, I wanna be with my kids when my wife takes it to school and she comes back, I wanna be with my wife and then, then I'll do stuff like talk to you.
• 46:00
  Then from here, I go to the next thing and it's like, I don't, my brain doesn't go go to social, go to social, go to social. Mm-hmm.
• 46:04
  . That, that's the one thing.
• 46:05
  But that's where the people I wanna serve are.
• 46:07
  So it's this thing where I have a, i I do set back and I carve out time to create amazing ideas and videos.
• 46:12
  Team puts it out. But yeah, the, the whole TikTok game, that's a whole, we gotta be more consistent. So I'm gonna work on that. Good for you.
• 46:18
  That I'm not, it's just more of like carving out time. Uh, we're off on a tangent. That's okay. I wanna appreciate your time. Thank you.
• 46:24
  And I wanna make sure we, we get outta here. So you have your world.
• 46:26
  You moved to, thank you for hanging out. Those of you are here with us.
• 46:28
  I appreciate you. Thank you for hanging out with us too.
• 46:30
  You could have been anywhere in the world, but you chose to come hang.
• 46:33
  If something that me or Jasmine shared in some manner that served you, go do it. It's the biggest thing I want you to take away is that we don't just say things to say them. You should say 'em and go here 'em and go, okay, how can I infuse it in my life? You do that and that's how your life changes.
• 46:46
  And if you know somebody who you've been trying to get through to and they haven't really got the nudge, maybe something that we have said today can be the nudge.
• 46:52
  So share this episode with them. Outside of that, I thank you again and as always, make the most of your awe shift moments so you can make shift happen.
• 47:00
  Anthony Trucks and Jasmine Starr signing off.
• 47:04
  Welcome back. I hope you enjoy that conversation.
• 47:07
  I'm still thinking about the implications of what Jasmine said when she shared that the very thing you want to do is on the other side of consistency.
• 47:15
  I know I've heard her say it before, but it was a fresh reminder to me of the importance of persevering even on the hardest of days. I hope it encourages you too. Thanks again for listening.
• 47:26
  We'll see you soon.