Latest / Dear Chelsea / Everyone’s a Little Bit Bi with Bretman Rock

Transcript

Everyone’s a Little Bit Bi with Bretman Rock · Dear Chelsea

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Okay, Hi, oh hi, everybody, it's us. It's Catherine and
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: Chelsea and it's called Dear Chelsea. Is what you're listening
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: to in case somebody tricked your phone. Yes, I found mushrooms.
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: And my place in Whistler, I had these chocolate mushrooms
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: that I supplied the entire mountain probably b C British
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: Columbia with last year when I was in Whistler, and
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: then when I left, I left everything there and so
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: this year when I was going through my things, I
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: found them and I have been taking like the tiniest,
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: like a half of a half of square every day
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: because now that I know more about micro dosing, like
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: I don't like the rush of the feeling, but I
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: like the up of the feeling. I have to say,
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: like I've found a perfect dose. Is this that the
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: chocolate mushrooms? These are chocolate mushrooms now and Whistler everyone
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: has capsules. They give you fifty milligrams or a hundred
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: milligrams or two hundred and fifty milligrams, which are also
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: just like they don't make you hallucinate. They just give
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: you an up and it's almost imperceptible, and it's nice
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: and it's great if you're outside to nature these. So
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: I took a little one a few days ago just
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: to see because I was like, oh, you know, when
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: you're not acclimated, you know, you can have bigger reactions.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: And I don't like that whoosh feeling that sometimes comes
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: on with mushrooms, where you're like yawning and it's very
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: overwhelming and you almost nauseated slightly. Anyway, I think I
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: found the perfect dosage, and I gave some to Joe Koy,
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: who's never done mushrooms, but somebody had given to him. Well,
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: he doesn't need an upper you know what I mean.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: He somebody gave it to gave them to him in Canada,
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: and he we were falling asleep. We had played pickleball
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: and we were falling asleep that night and he was
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: He's like, honey, you's just so funny. Everything you say
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: is so funny. And I was like, uh huh huh,
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: and he goes, I just can't stop smiling every time
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: I think of you. I'm like, oh my god, honey,
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: those are mushrooms. That's what you're feeling. That was not
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: a micro dose, that's a dose. And he's like, is
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: that what it is, I go, yes, go into beds
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: with a smile on your face is mushrooms. So I
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: just want everyone to know that you also can go
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: to his bed with a smile on your face if
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: you get yourself some mushrooms too. I've never done mushrooms.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: That's very hard for me to believe. Really, do I
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: seem like a person who's like out in the world.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: I think that you've experimented with drugs I have. Well,
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: let me tell you, I am also like not a
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: very good weed smoker. The first time I ever smoked weed,
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: it was great. I had a fun time. The second
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: time I ever smoked weed, I had the worst time ever.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: It was in Indiana. It was like maybe laced with
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: something like hallucinations voices. It was terrible. That definitely sounds
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: like it was laced with something. Yeah, so I didn't
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: touch it for the longest time. And I can really
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: only do it when like my set and setting are
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: very specific, like I feel very safe. But I also
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: just find like I don't love the feeling of being high.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: I don't love the feeling of like the time distortion,
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: but I do just like and this is advice I
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: got from you from working on this show, but just
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: doing tiny, tiny doses like I find even one or
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: two and a half my MiGs is like my sweet spot,
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: where it's just a little twinkle, like you don't feel high. Yes,
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: So that's good that you found that out about yourself
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: and that you didn't shy away from it, because there
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: is a right amount for everybody, and some people's sometimes
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: Like yesterday, I had a day off unexpectedly. I was
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: thought I was working all day and I had the
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: day off, and so I had a fun day and
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: I took two edibles at around three o'clock, got into
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: bed and watched a bunch of TV, which is basically
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: my favorite thing to do in the whole world, is
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: to lie in bed and watch TV, especially if there's
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: something good. I love it. I love it. I got
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: that from my mom. My mom used to lie in
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: bed all the time. And then when I was seeing
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: my therapist, he's like, your mom sounds like she was depressed.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: I'm like, well, then I'm fucking depressed too, because I've
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: got the same sleeping gene. I just want to be
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: snuggling all the time. And you're on the ghost so much.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: I'm sure that it's like, yeah, but I haven't, and
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: I haven't inordinate or disproportionate desire to to be in
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: bed Like it's just two. It's outweighs everything else I'd
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: like to be doing. So yes, I can have a
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: very busy life, but I have no problem chilling the
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: funk out. Good, very good. Well, I have a follow
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: up from someone who has taken your advice, Chelsea. This
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: is from Christina and she joined us on our episode
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: with Taylor Tomlinson Comics, stating comics, she was the one
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: with the boyfriend who her friend thought he was a deadbeat.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: But she's a lawyer and she needed to talk to
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: her friend about how she's really into this guy. She says,
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: Dear Chelsea, I have a little update. I talked to
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: my friend and we had a really honest conversation. She
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: admitted that she did want me to break up with
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: my boyfriend, but mostly it was because she feared I
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: wasn't just settling for him, I was settling in life.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: Side story. In law school, I interned at the A C.
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: L U and my school's environmental law clinic. I wrote
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: a published piece on racial discrimination post nine eleven, Like
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: this woman does everything. She's wonderful. Suffice it to say,
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: I really care about social justice and have much bigger
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: dreams than my current corporate job. I'd love to take
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: a job doing something I care about, but those are
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: scarce in Miami. My boyfriend has always said he'd never
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: leave Miami. She said she really believes in me and
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: thinks I can do so much more than just live
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: in Miami with my boyfriend forever. And I explained to her,
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: I understand I have my own fears about waking up
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: in twenty years with regret, but for now, I have
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: no idea what life has in store, and I'm still
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: hopeful I won't have to compromise my dreams or my relationship.
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's cocky, but I'm really shooting to have it all.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: So I made it clear we're not breaking up anytime soon,
• 5:31
  Speaker 1: and asked that she please respect my decision. She seemed
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: a little disappointed but understanding, and so far our friendship
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: is as strong as ever, minus the verbal subtweets. Thanks
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: so much for your advice, and I cannot wait to
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: see you. And you're vaccinated and horny tour. Oh good,
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: that's good, good, great? Good for her? Yeah, yeah, I'm comfortable.
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: Conversations are worth having. Yeah, and especially if you know
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: the friend is somebody who can handle that conversation, then
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: you know they're are there to stick around. Yeah. And
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: also the truth brings you together, Like saying that she
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: wanted you to break up with him is truthful, and
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: that's not easy to say either. So like it's good
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: that she was honest, and it's good that you were honest. Yeah. Absolutely, Well,
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: we have a really exciting guest today. Oh yeah, he's
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: an internet sensation, you guys. Oh my god, Annie's Filipinos.
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: So you know that I love Filipinos, you guys, if
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: you don't follow this guy on Instagram or TikTok. He
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: is an Asian American digital superstar known for his unique
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: sense of comedy, gender bending fashion, and creating the new
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: standard of male beauty that is followed by over forty
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: five million fans globally. He has comedy, fashion and beauty
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: sensation bretman Rock. He has his own TV series on
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: MTV It's called brettman Rock, and his YouTube originals limited
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: series Thirty Days with brettman Rock, which showcases him digging
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: deeper into his spirituality while alone and off the grid
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: in the jungle. Please welcome. This will nugget Bretman rock Bretman.
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, let me see that hot little body.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: Why are you hiding it from us? This is Katherine
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: Katherin's and my producer. Hi, miss Katherine. I love the
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: purple hair. Thank you. It's nice to meet you. Brettman.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: The last time that you and I spoke. Are you good?
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: Are you ready? Yes? I needed some lighting, you know, honey,
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: I of course you need. By the way, Brettman's pronouns
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: are he, she and they, so you can just call
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: him her, they whatever, right. Whatever you see, honestly, that's
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: what I say. Whatever you see is what you can
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: call me. Well, what I see is a fantast magoria
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: of light and energy. That's what I see when I
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: look at you. Thank you. I am a divine creature.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: Thank you. First of all, I'm Pennie. Now did you
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: know that? I know? I was like, we have so
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: much things in common. Now you're like Feltena on these
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: days thanks to the power of semen. Honestly tell me
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: about it. Also, I did not know you guys were dating.
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: For the longest. I thought you guys were just like
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: best these for a while because you guys were just
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: like making videos and I was like, Miss Joe and
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: Miss Chelsea's really hang out and he loves joke. By
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: the way, I was there. I don't know if he's
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: told you, but he had like the nine sold out
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: shows back to back to back. I didn't even get
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: a ticket, but my mom wanted to go, Well, we're
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: gonna hang out with you when we come in July.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: I'm there July three and fourth and Maui and then Oahu,
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: aren't you on Oahu? I'm on Oahu. Wait did he
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: name his book Mixed Plate because of his experience and
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: eat or what? Because I have a theory that it's
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: because he ate at zippies. I ate at zippies, yes,
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: and like all of the food and zippies are like
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: all mixed plate food. So I was like, m he
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: probably ate at zippies. Well, we came. We came the
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: last time he was playing the Blaisdell Arena. The last
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: time we were here. We came for Thanksgiving, and so
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: I was there for like literally two and a half days.
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: Otherwise we would have been looking for you. But in
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: those two and a half days, I ate more mayonnaise
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: than I've eaten in forty five years. Because in Hawaii
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: they put mayonnaise on everything. Everything mayonnaise, and sometimes we
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: do the mayonnaise catchup mix, you know, like the cute
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: little hot pink color. We put that on everything too.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: Is there a name for that? Is that Russian dressing?
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: Mayonnaise and catchup? I don't know what we call it,
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: but I am the mayonnaise that I think you're like,
• 9:26
  Speaker 1: do you like the mayonnaise here? Well, I just don't
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: need that much mayonnaise really on anything, because I think
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: we use like more like the Japanese mayonnaise instead of
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: like the Yeah, it's like an a oli, isn't it
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: like an aoli sauce kind of thing like calamari. Yeah,
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: comes like a soup more so than a dish. But whatever.
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: You know, if I'm going to transition into being a
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: Filipina and being Hawaiian, I'm just gonna have to accept
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: all of these things and let my body just do
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: its thing. Yeah. Also, we're both like playboy models now,
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: Miss Chausey. I don't know if you saw that, but
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: I saw that. I saw that. That was a dream
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: come true for you. Recently, right was? And then I
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: saw your Christmas one that you posted like a while back,
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: and I was like, she really coming for my gig first,
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: and now she wants to be a big model. I've
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: always been coming for you, Bretman. Bretman and I first met.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: We did this like makeup collaboration for something a few
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: years ago, and Bretman showed up to the set and
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: was one hot mess. And I this is from the
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: Queen of hot messes. Okay, okay, first of all, let
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: me explain myself. My my first manages told me about
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: that deal. I was like, what is me and going
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: to talk about? So she was like, oh, you know,
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: you guys have so many things in common. You guys
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: are both funny, and you guys smoke weeds. So I
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: was like, I'm gonna go high. So I took a
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: fat red before I came and that was that. So
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: I was, Yes, I was a mess, and I'm so sorry. No,
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: I know it wasn't. It wasn't a shoot that required
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: us to be anything less than a mess. To be
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: honest with you, we had to be a mess, but
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: cover it up. Yeah, exactly. He did my makeup. I
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: think I tried to do his anyway. No, Remember you
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: were like mad at me because I think, like last minute,
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: I was like, I don't think I could do her
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: makeup today, So I ended up like having to teach
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: you how to do it. Oh yeah, you couldn't apply
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: it yourself. Why was that? Because I low key don't
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: know how to do other people's makeup, Like I know
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: how to do my face, but like, I feel like
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: if I did your makeup, you would have just looked
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: like me, which I mean, that's not really a problem
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: with that, but um, I didn't want you look like
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: a Bremen rock. So that I think it's because I
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: know how my face is shaped, and like we obviously
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: have different face shapes and we do like an egg.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: What's going on with you these days? How's your love life?
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: Is there anything happening in that department? Let me, mother
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: tell you? Tell me why I'm I want to go
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: see a spiritual healer, and I know if you believe
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: in that shack. And she was telling me all these
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: things about like my grandma because she was kind of
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: like my spiritual guide growing up. I grew up very spiritual,
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: and I was feeling off, so I went to go
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: see a Native American and woman who does like all
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: these practices. And at the end, she was like, are
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: you seeing anybody right now? And I was like, nos
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: this and she goes, I think there's somebody that like
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: hecks you. And when she said that, it clicked to me.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: It was my ax because he practiced that stuff and
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: he would always joke around and be like, if you
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: ever leave me, I'll make sure you'll never find anybody again.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: And at the time I was just like ha ha,
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: oh my god, that's so funny, like you're so goofy,
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: but that this really hecks me. And now I have
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: a hard time like connecting with men, and like every
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: time like men flirted with me, like it's hard for
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: me to like distinguished now, like my assistant literally has
• 12:37
  Speaker 1: to be like right, he was hitting on you. It's
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: hard for me like see that. Now, every time I
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: get close to somebody, I always feel like I'm cheating
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: on somebody. So I always like ghost boys just for
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: an ed reason. And I and when she said that,
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: I was hex I was like, oh my god, it's
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: him doing that. So yeah, that's the update on my
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: love life. So was that person able to remove the
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: hecks I start, I was like, how do we get
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: rid of this? What fun? And then she was like,
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: I think your grandma is strong enough, and I really
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: feel like your grandma let it happen. And when she
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: said that, it also clicked in my head that like,
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: after I got dumped Miss Chelsea, my life turned upside down,
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: Like I grew out my hair. I looked like more
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: like Breman Rock more than I've ever did in my
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: whole entire life. And I feel like I needed that
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: ship to happen to finally step into who I was
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: meant to be. And like ever since then, I had
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: like my MTV show My Playboy, like back to back cover.
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: It's like, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I don't
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: mean to be like bragging about myself. Really like I
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: went through all that show I've been to go for
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: a whole year just so that I could focus myself.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: And she said that your grandma. If your grandma did
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: not want you to go through it, she would have
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: blocked it off. And she said that I had to
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: go through it, and I think I had to because
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: I found who I really was, I think, and I'm
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: more confident than of who myself in my career than
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: ever before. So yeah, that's a great feeling, isn't it
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: to feel self assured and confident in who you are? Yeah?
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: I think I really at the end of the day,
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: I really just had to fall in love with myself,
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: and I think that's what happened. I fell in love
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: with Remen Rock. Yeah. Yeah, that's interesting you say that
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: because a lot of people think that you have to
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: fall in love with yourself physically. You know, they're not
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: looking at the internal and like, you actually have to
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: fall in love with your personality and your emotionality, Like
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: you have to fall in love with you who you are,
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: not just the way you look. And especially in the
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: world that we're in or in the social media and everything,
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: everyone kind of gets reduced down to the way they
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: look and how good they look for how old they
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: are or whatever. Well more for me than for you,
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: since you're like eight months old. But I like that
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: that you took a break and you kind of stepped
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: into your own power because I think that's a typical
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: situational circumstance. When you get out of a relationship, you
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: start to look at yourself in a different way, and
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: it's a huge growth experience, right when you break up
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: and you're on your own, and he was like my
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: first love. I swore I was gonna marry him. People
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: calling me eight times, I ran back eight. It got
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: to a point where, like, literally the seven time you
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: broke up with me that one month, I literally was,
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: I don't even pray mitelca, I don't pray. And I
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: was like to please God, like, please leave me already,
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: because I could not. I don't know why, but I
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: could not have the willpower to like break up with
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: somebody after like chasing them eight times. So it got
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: to a point where I was like, please, whoever is
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: listening up there, please tell him to leave me. Yeah, seven,
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: seven or eight times? If going back, I call that
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: recidivism where you are performing the same wrong thing you've
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: done so many times, then yeah, I think after you
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: break up with somebody twice and you get back together,
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: that's a rap. We should have like term limits on
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: all of these things, just for younger people coming into it,
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: because it's like there's no healthy relationship where you're breaking
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: up five or six times and getting back together. No
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: one's ever gonna be like this is gonna work out
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: what about therapy, breatman, do you go to any therapists?
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: I go to the physical therapy because I injured my
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: shoulder the other months. Yeah, that's not the same fucking thing.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: I know. I know, I struggle finding the courage to
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: go see a therapist, Miss Chelsea. I do, I genuinely do,
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: and I think it's because I was traumatized from like
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: early years when I did see like a therapist like
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: that didn't know how to deal with like kids, especially
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: like growing up with like an Asian mom who joking
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: probably said something similar to like some Asian moms truly
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: do not believe in mental health, like not even Asian moms,
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: like foreign moms, like they think that we're just like
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: being dramatic. Like even when I told my mom, like
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: I was telling her about my anxiety and how I
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: have social anxiety, and she was like, girl, you're just
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: being dramatic, like you're like she didn't say that, but
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: in my language she did. So I think for like
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: a while, I also like didn't take my mental health
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: seriously because my mom convinced me that it was like
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: all in my head, and that's what it is. It
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: is all in my head. But them, Yeah, I am,
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: I am. I really am building the courage to go
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: see a therapist. I texted my manager like last month,
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: I was like, I think this is the year that
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: I need to see a therapist because even if it
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: if even if it isn't for Bretman, I need to
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: see a therapist for Bretman Rock because fame is not fun.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: So tell, let's talk about your fame. Let's how are
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: you handling being famous? I think I don't like to
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: call myself a child star, but it kind of is, because,
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: like I started this journey when I was in high school.
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: I was a sophomore, and so a lot of like
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: my audience like grew up with me, and so I
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: also grew up with fame and like handling fame. But
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: also at the same time, I live in haw VIII
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: and so you know, a population of four people, So
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: like it's hard for me to like feel famous in
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: how VII when like really like everyone that wants to
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: meet you here, I've already met you when you were
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: like in high school. Everyone here has made me like
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: three or four or five times already. It's like, oh,
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: it's just Bretman. But I truly only feel fame when
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: I'm in l A. And that's why I think I
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: hate l A because LA reminds me of work, and
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: that's why I thrived, because it doesn't have the pressure
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: of like faith. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, Well,
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: Joe and I are spending like our winters and Whistler
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: and I love to get out of l A to
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: go to Whistler because it's just a completely It's all
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: about nature, it's all about skiing, it's all about being outside.
• 18:20
  Speaker 1: If you're not skiing, you're doing something else physical. No
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: one gives a ship about Hollywood. No one's talking about that.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: No one's stopping me to say I need a picture.
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: They just all know that I'm there and that's the
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: way it's going to be. But it's Whistler in Canada. Yes,
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: it is a bit. I have a story about getting
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: into Canada, but continue. But I I think that, Yeah,
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: a lot of artists and creators like to be away
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: from the hustle of it, like being in l A
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: all the time. It's just not a healthy situation. I know.
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: For me, I need a time out all the time.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: And I like being on the road because one of
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: the reasons I love being on the road and being
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: on tour is to be out of l A because
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: you just I don't like to be competitive and I
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: don't like to look around too much. And when I'm
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: in l A, I noticed that about myself more exactly. So, um, yeah,
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: that's kind of like me too. And what's up with
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: your sister? How's she doing? Girl? How is she not doing? Honestly,
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: the day my sister is something. Um, she's also on
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: her focusing on myself era right now because she just
• 19:20
  Speaker 1: got on vote relationship. We're raising our two kids, and yeah,
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: we're getting back to our regular scheduling with like YouTube
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: videos and stuff like that. I actually wanted to ask
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: you about, like podcasts. That's something that we wanted to do,
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: Like is this fun? Oh yeah. First of all, you
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: can do it wherever the funk you want to, So
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: that's a number one. You can do that right there
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: where you're sitting, and you could do it with somebody
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: you love to talk to. All you have to do
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: is shoot the ship. That's so easy, right, Yeah, it
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: I feel like it's more simpler than the YouTube video.
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: I feel like, even just now, I feel like I
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: didn't even know we started when we started. But like,
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: but with YouTube, it's like, oh my gosh, you have
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: to kind of follow like a story. Let's talk about
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: this now, it's talk about this now, or I mean
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: a lot of people don't even have guests on their podcast,
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: Like you and your sister could just hang out and
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: talk and have guests when you feel like it, because
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: that way, you're just shooting the ship and you don't
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: have to have like an A, B and C cut
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: it up in any way. Because people do love to
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: hear you talk. It's just more of you to give people.
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: So it's an easy thing to deliver. And I would say, yeah,
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: go for a podcast. It's another way to just gain
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: more people listening to you talking to you, and it
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: all feeds the other things, like it feeds the YouTube.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: The YouTube feeds the podcast. And I also, I am
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: so tired of getting ready for you to I got
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: ready today and I just half when I was like
• 20:37
  Speaker 1: halfway done doing my makeup, I was like, wait, isn't
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: just it isn't it just our voice? Like why am
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: I getting ready? So yeah, I feel like with podcasts,
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: I don't have to get ready anymore. I could just
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: show up right. Yeah, Well everything now is online, so
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: it doesn't matter even though a podcast, Like I thought
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: podcasts weren't makeup and hair, and now podcasts are. They
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: post them there on YouTube you can have them, so
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: it's like it's basically a television all over again. It
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: called a podcast. Yeah, you look beautiful, by the way,
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: your makeup is amazing, Like you do have a really
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: great knack for not for white women obviously because he
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: tried that on me, but you do have a great
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: hand at makeup. I mean, look how beautiful he looks.
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank you so much. That's so sweet. I
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: just grew up with too many women in my life,
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: I feel. And I grew up watching our version of
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: super Bowl, which is in this universe in the Philippines.
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: We treat that ship like a super Bowl, and I
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: just grew up like in awe of hair and makeup
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: and like watching these women in their heels and like
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: bikinis and gowns. And I just grew up watching that
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: and I wanted to be those women. And like the
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: third world country girls are always winning this universe because
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: we got the face. Yeah, you know the bone structure. Yeah,
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: why don't we get you're not kidding? Why don't we
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: get you into MRS Universe. That was actually my first gig,
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: and that was actually when I really I need to
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: I'm not an interviewer. My first gig ever was I
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: was sixteen years old. They did Miss Universe in the
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: Philippines and I hosted the red carpet thing, and that's
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: when I realized I cannot help. I truly do not
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: give a funk about other people, Like I cannot sit
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: there and pretend like I care what you're wearing. Um, so, yeah,
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: I did Miss Universe, but I need to be a
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: contestant honestly, or like a judge. Now that's what I'm
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: talking about, not the Red carpet. You need to be
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: competing or a judge. Well no, I still you need
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: to maybe after you win, but you need to be
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: in the MISSRS Universe's pageant. Why not, right? I I
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: feel like I would be really good at the Q
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: and A portion and the bikini portion. Yeah yeah, anything,
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: Well that's yeah, well we'll see about that. I have.
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: Is that the thing that Donald Trump brons or is
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: that Miss America? Trust me, I looked it up. I
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: made sure I made sure that bitch was not running it.
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: When I posted the red carpet because I'm not having that, bitch,
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: So I my check. No, don't worry. He wouldn't sign
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: it anyway. He host like, how do I owe fucking
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: money for doing this? So Brettman on this podcast, we
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: have callers and people who write in for advice about life,
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: and so yeah, so we're gonna take some callers and
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: Catherine's gonna read us some emails, and we're just going
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: to give off advice of what we think how they
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: should handle the situation. Okay, I feel like my first
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: advice would probably be don't take my advice. Okay, well, no, noted.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: We'll keep that in there so that everyone is aware
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: not to take Brettman's advice. Thank you. I will say
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: advice though. Okay, good. Well we'll take a quick break
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: and we'll be back with some emails and calls to
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: the commercial. And we're back from break. Brettman just took
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: a quick shower. You took a shower, right, Brettan you guys,
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: I actually needed an outfit change, so thank you for
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: letting me change. Okay, well, it looks like you're wearing
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: the same exact thing, so it's all very suspicious. Well,
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: our first email comes from be subject line is a
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: little slash big problem. Dear Chelsea. I recently went on
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: a few dates with this guy who checks all the
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: boxes except for one thing. He told me he has
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: a problem getting it up. He's thirty. I asked if
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: he takes anything for it, and he said nothing works.
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: That's a huge problem because a healthy sex life is
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: a very important part of a relationship. To me, I
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: don't want to be the one to quote help him
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: fix it because I think I'm way too young to
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: have to deal with this issue. I'm seven. I think
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: there are so many other men in this world that
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: it's maybe just onto the next one. But I really
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: like him. Thoughts b m M, I have so many
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: questions with Chelsea. Would you like to go first? Now?
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: Why don't you go for ast Bretman Ladies first? Well,
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: that kind of like, honestly, when you were reading it,
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: it kind of just brought me back to Honestly, I
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: had a whole flashback, like whole Raven Stamoe moment when
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: I used to have a daddy at one point once
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: up one a time and he was house so like
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: in his thirties, and I wouldn't say he had a
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: hard time like getting it up, but he would always
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: be like, you have to squeeze it. So I would say,
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: have you tried squeezing it really hard? That's okay, Well
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: there you go. Uh So, squeeze his dick as hard
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: as you can and see what happens. And if nothing happens,
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: then you have your answer and you can stop dating him. Yeah. Yeah,
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: But also, do you believe in like those like aphrodisiacs
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: and stuff like that. I'm very Filipino and we have
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: a lot of those ships. There's this one shot where
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: like it's an alcohol shot and there's like a rattlesnake
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: inside and I guess it's they believe that it has
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: like afrodiziac components or whatever the funk. So if you
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: struggle like getting it up, I recommend getting a shot
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: of the Cobra liquor. Yeah. Okay, So those are two
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: great options for solutions. The other thing you can do
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: is like you can make a small amount of effort
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: to try and help him with his problem, like you know,
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: finding a sex therapyst. I'm sure that he hasn't really
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: sat down and run through all the options of what
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: might because there's there's something for everybody, there's an antidote
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: for everything. And you already said you're not going to
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: marry the guy, so it's okay for you to walk away,
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: but you can put in a little effort towards trying
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: to figure out what might help his situation, And then
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: I would agree with you, like only if you really
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: like him, I would agree that there are too many
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: men out there, if that is such an important thing
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: to you, which it is to me, Like I need
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: to get fucked too. I like sex, Yes, all the time,
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: Whenever I want it, I want it so like I
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: get that if if this won't work for you, it
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: won't work for you. But if you want to try
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: and make a little bit more of an effort, sit
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: with a sex therapist, see if she has anything interesting
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: to say to him that he has never heard before,
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: or he can go on his own whatever. And then
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: if that doesn't work, because it could be something that
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: he hasn't tried, that he hasn't even thought about. There's
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: so much shame behind people when they can't perform sexually,
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: shame on both ends. You know, It's like it's shameful
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: for a girl when I've been around so many guys
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: who can't get it up, you know, due to my personality,
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: and I always blame myself. Like there was a period
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: where I thought something was seriously wrong with my vagina,
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: Like I had my friends look at it, I had
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: them smell it. I was like, it's something off here
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: because I need to know. And no, it had nothing
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: to do with you. Would you You're not, you know,
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: struggling with but yeah, if that's important to you, then
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: you know that doesn't sound like you're guy. So end
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: of story there. Yeah, And I have odd things fell
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: trying men, you know, t him trying men. Oh, tell
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: him to try a man, Yeah, I mean yeah, and
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: I all things fail. We can give him Bretman's give
• 27:33
  Speaker 1: him Bret Fan's direct line. Yeah, and so he could
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: just get in touch with him right away. Would you
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: like to get your dick squeezed in Hawaii because we
• 27:44
  Speaker 1: have the perfect handidate. Yes, thank you, thanks, yes, Well.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: Our next question comes from D. And I didn't put
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: those next to each other on purpose, but this is D.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: She's on the phone with us as well. She says,
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: dear chill, see, my boyfriend of seven years will not
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: propose to me. We've had many conversations about it. We've
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: both said out loud that we want to get married.
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: He treats me incredibly well, and we're best friends and
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: very much in love. However, I feel like I'm watching
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: him prioritize other pleasures before our future together. For example,
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: he has a monthly marijuana bill that he won't give
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: up and recently bought a PS five. Understandable, He's always
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: been able to be present despite these indulgences, and I
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: never want to criticize his lifestyle, especially when I thought
• 28:29
  Speaker 1: there was room for an engagement too. I thought that
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: the proposal process might be intimidating to him, so I
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: tried to take the pressure off and suggested we get
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: engaged as a team, pick out rings together and celebrate.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: He insisted that isn't the way it's supposed to be.
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: He told me to email him styles of rings I like,
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: so I did. The first time I thought he might
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: pop the question was in October, when he took an
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: overnight trip to a comedy show in Detroit. It didn't happen.
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: I didn't realize how much a proposal disappointment would funk
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: with my head. It was brutal, but I kept my cool.
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: Then when we exchanged Christmas gifts, the big gift I
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: received was a speaker system for our TV, and I
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: don't know why he thought a soundbar and subwiffer was
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: a gift I would ever want or need. How do
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: I stay calm and centered about this? And what the
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: hell more can I say to convey how I'm feeling
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: about this to him? One more dashed proposal may take
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: a serious toll on my mental health. D Hi, d Hi,
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: d h hi d This is Brettman and Catherine. We're
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: all here for you today. Hello, it's so great to
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: be speaking with you all. I okay, so you want
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: to get married? Yes? So yeah. I was very angry
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: when I wrote in, but somehow I did not completely
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: go off on him. We got through the holidays together,
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: and I sat down with him and I just said,
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: really blatantly, I am ready to be engaged. I don't
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: see why we can't be engaged at this point, and
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: and I did suggest once again to just do it together,
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: like it doesn't have to all fall on his shoulders.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: His response was he just had some car troubles and
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: he didn't want to propose over the holidays because we're
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: really busy. And his words where it will happen soon enough,
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: to which I replied, soon enough is not going to
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: work for me. So um, oh no, it's it's okay.
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: So I said that wasn't gonna work for me. I
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: really need to know that it's like a priority for
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: you as much as it is for me. So he
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: said no, seriously, like it's a priority now, it's going
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: to happen soon, I promised, And after talking to him,
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: like he's never said that much information about this topic before.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: So I did feel a lot better at that point. Okay,
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: And how are you feeling now? Now I'm feeling good.
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: I think I just need him to know. And I
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: did say this when you think a proposal is coming
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: up and then like special dates happened and you go
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: on a trip or something like you think it's going
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: to happen, and so I just it's a real mind fuck,
• 31:22
  Speaker 1: Like I was stunned by how much it impacted like
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: my mental state. Right, Okay, So is there a timeline
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: where if he doesn't propose, you're done. No, I didn't
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: make it like an ultimatum thing, like I was really
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: scared to bring it up to be honest, because I
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: don't want to sound like some kind of pressuring nag. Yeah, no,
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: I mean it sounds like he's going to propose to you.
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, and he hasn't said that much yet, right
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: thus far, he thought was the most he said about it, right,
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: the most committed he's been about it. Yes, like we've
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: talked about marriage of course, like it wasn't really a
• 31:59
  Speaker 1: question of what there it would happen or not, but
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: he always like laughed it off before if it was
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: brought up like that was the first time that we
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: had a serious conversation about it. I don't know if
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: it's like because of the element of surprise that we
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: never talked about it more in a less ambiguous way.
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: But if I brought it up before, it was like
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: kind of laughed off by him or just subject changed.
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: So that there's progress. Right in that conversation, it sounds
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: like there is her husban. Yes, that was the best
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: conversation we've probably had about it so far. And when
• 32:35
  Speaker 1: was that? That was right around the holidays? Okay, Well,
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: I think it sounds like it's going in the direction
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: you want you. I just think you need to like
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: relax a little bit. Your timeline isn't his timeline. You're
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: not and you don't have you don't need to be
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: on a timeline. You're young. You know, like it's a
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: matter of months. I think we're talking about at this point.
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: You know, if six months goes by and he doesn't propose,
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: then yeah, then you need to give him an ultimatum.
• 32:59
  Speaker 1: But I think what you said was perfect. The way
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: you put it, like this is a priority for me,
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: and not giving him an ultimatum is really good. You
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: know that was strong. You made yourself be heard. He understands.
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: I don't think him buying a ps what is it called,
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: brettan a ps PS six is going to interfere that much.
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: I think five. I'm sorry, I'm not straight, So he
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: doesn't know. He doesn't know. Bretman, what are your thoughts
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: on this topic of marriage. I'm kind of just like
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: thinking about where how he values marriage, because for me,
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: I come from like a very traumatizing marriage of like parents,
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: and so the way I see marriage is different from
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: other people. I'm also at the age where like all
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: of my friends are getting engaged and they're so excited
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: about it, and it's like everything they ever like think
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: of it. I'm just like, oh my gosh, if I
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: ever got engaged, I feel like I would say no,
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: Like I I don't know, marriage to me kind of
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: scares me sometimes. So it's it's so cool to see
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: like that you're so excited for it, because I think
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: my parents will went marriage from me. So I almost
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: want to ask you, like if he had bad experiences
• 34:07
  Speaker 1: like with marriage, and if that's why he's kind of
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: like scared to get engaged, or even the idea of
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: getting engaged, like probably scared him. I don't. I don't know.
• 34:15
  Speaker 1: We don't know where his mind's at. I think that's
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: a really good point. I mean, we both come from
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: divorced parents, so that definitely could be impacting him. I
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: also wondered too, if again, the conversation was so ambiguous before.
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: I wonder if I was more straightforward like earlier on
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: like maybe we would be engaged right now. But I
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: totally hear what you're saying. I think though, that you
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: were you listen, it doesn't matter what you did before, Like,
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: don't blame yourself for this, Like you're playing in reverse
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: and future instead of playing in the present. You put
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: it out there with integrity. You said what you did
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: without whining, or you said it like, Okay, this is
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: what's important to me and you've got to level up,
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: and that is really dignified. So enjoy the moment that
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: you're in, let him come to you, and have it
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: just a time period in your mind that is that's
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: not going to be work for you anymore. You know,
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: if it gets past, say six months, and you want
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: to say, listen, I told you what I needed. You
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: didn't listen, And now we have to talk about like
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: what what we're doing? Are we breaking up? Are we
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: going to stay together? Because my future this is what
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: I want. I mean, are you willing to break up
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: with him if he doesn't want to marry you? Is
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: that something? I mean? In the grand scheme of things,
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: it's a really good relationship. I wouldn't go so far
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: as to say that right now, but it feels like
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: I know him really well. So now that we talked
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: like it, it feels like I know that it's coming,
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: whereas before I could tell that it wasn't coming. And yeah,
• 35:47
  Speaker 1: I mean again, it's a good relationship, So I don't
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: I don't think I would go so far as to
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: say that. Now. Okay, okay, well you've got all that,
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: You've done everything you can possibly do. You just have
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: to let it go and let it happen. Let him
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: come to you. I bet you he's going to do
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: something really, really special for your engagement. And I bet
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: you're gonna look back at all of the times where
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: you were upset. Who wants to get proposed to? And
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: fuck Detroit? I mean, what are you talking about? You know,
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: a comedy club in Detroit. That's not the right time
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: for him to propose to you. Maybe he's also waiting
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: to take you on Chelsea's comedy tour. That's where you
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: get proposed, That's where you get engaged. Oh my goodness,
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: that would be such a thrill and it'd be such
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: a full circle thing. And I I only let gay
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: people get engaged at my shows, so we're very discriminatory
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: at my shows. But you know what I mean, like
• 36:40
  Speaker 1: your ideas and his ideas, your two separate personalities. I
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: tell Joe this all the time, because Joe has a
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: completely different person and he doesn't understand why. Like I
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: don't get excited about anything, He'll be like he gets
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: excited to wake up in the morning and I'm like,
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: pipe down, you know, and he doesn't, and I always
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: have to go Joe, I'm not you. I don't think
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: like about you know. I could say a two walk
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: in the morning, let's go, I want to go ice skating.
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: He'll be like, let's go. Like I will never have
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: that reaction for him. If he says let's go ice
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: skating at two in the morning, I'll say, fuck you,
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: like I'm not going ice skating. But you have to
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: remind yourself you're two different people. You have two different outlooks.
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: You know, your outlook is not his, your imprint is
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: not his, and your life experiences are not his. So
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: let him come to this. You've made yourself very clear
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: it's gonna happen. Everything's gonna work out, And just be
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: proud of the way that you conducted yourself and don't
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: stop around and don't do anything else until it does happen.
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: You know, don't have the expectations even if you go
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: away for a night, don't put that in there. Just
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: remember what you just told me. This is a really
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: good relationship. Enjoy being in it because so many people
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: don't have that. Yeah, And also I would say communicate
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: at about stuff before it's like, oh my god, I'm
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: going out of my mind about this. Like bring it
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: up early, get it out there, start talking about it.
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: And also tell him that a subwoffer is not what
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: you would have wanted to tell him. He needs to
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: get you gifts for you, not gifts they wants themselves. Yeah.
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: Men are so fucking stupid with gifts. I mean honestly.
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: I mean my driver bought his wife a blender for
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: their fiftieth anniversary. I had to take it away from him. Yeah.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: I had to go in. I had to get jewelry
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: out of my jewelry and say, give this to her.
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: This is ridiculous. You're gonna give her a fucking blender. Yeah, No,
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: it wasn't. Okay if I wouldn't know a blend tech
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: if I hopped inside it and spun around myself. But
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: I'm assuming it wasn't because Billy just doesn't know what
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: he's doing. But d you also just have to remember
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: one other thing. This is a great thing to remember
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: to like use this experience moving forward. When you guys
• 38:38
  Speaker 1: do get married and you start a family or whatever
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: your dreams are, remember this because you had expectations. You
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: weren't sharing with him, and then you did, and you
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: feel a lot differently now. So yeah, use this as
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: a guide for your further communication in the future of
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: this relationship. Absolutely, and that makes a lot of sense. Yeah,
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: and let us know what happens. Keep us posted, okay, yeah,
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: oh yes, I will definitely let you know when it happens.
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: I'll send the cliche I said, yes, and then we
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: could have Brettan officiate the wedding. It'll be like it'll
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: be a slam dunk. No, you said, finally not yet.
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: I love that. Thanks so much. Do we wish you
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: a big surprise when it finally happens. So much for
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: having me on. I really admire your work, Chelsea. You're welcome.
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: De nice to speak with you. Nice to speak with you.
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: I Chelsea, you are so good at these advices the
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: way I would have been like um been proposed to him.
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Well, most people are just calling in because
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: they just need comfort, right, don't you think? I think so.
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: They just want someone to tell them that it's going
• 39:58
  Speaker 1: to happen. Do you know how many times when something
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: went wrong with the guy that I was dating, or
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: someone didn't call me, or I hooked up with a
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: guy and didn't hear from him. I would go around
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: the world and so I got every answer that I wanted,
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: which who was from people who had nothing to do
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: with my experience. You know, like those experience where you'd
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: give somebody your number and then and then you're talking
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: to your girlfriends like maybe he lost it. Maybe maybe
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: he died on a bicycle accident on the way home
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: from our day. Maybe he's dead. It's like, no, no,
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: he's not fucking calling you because he's not interested. Stop
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: creating bullshit around basic fundamentals, and then you just picked
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: the answer that you like, right exactly. Well. Our next
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: question comes from Sarah. Sarah says, Dear Chelsea, I'm thirty
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: years old and have been with my boyfriend for four years.
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: We met working at a restaurant when we were in
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: our teens, ran it together along with our friends until
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: We've had our ups and downs, just like any other couple.
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: But I know he's my person and we both feel
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: that on a soul level. I recently back to school
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: for massage therapy and started working at a local coffee
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: shop for a flexible, easy job to get me through
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: It's been great so far, but I'm the oldest employee.
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: All the other girls are late teens or early twenties.
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: The other day, a co worker asked if I was
• 41:14
  Speaker 1: by I wasn't offended or anything, as I know I
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: give off that vibe, but I nonchalantly said no. She
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: stared at me a while asked if I was sure
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: because her and another employee's gaidar went off when I
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: first started, and they wanted to ask me about it.
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: They think that I have unlocked potential. I don't, though
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: I don't consider myself anything but straight. It's not like
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: I've never been attracted to women, but I've never experimented before,
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: and it's not something I could fathom inside my current relationship.
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: My boyfriend and I have talked about it in the past,
• 41:46
  Speaker 1: but we're both uncomfortable inviting another person into our sex life.
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: I'd be super jealous, and so would he. We both
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: have anxiety, and I think I'd be excited but freak
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: out when it came time to get down to business.
• 41:58
  Speaker 1: Neither of us want to share each other. Even in
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: the situation. He gave me a whole pass of sorts
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: to experiment on my own. I feel as if I
• 42:04
  Speaker 1: was cheating. I do watch girl on girl porn sometimes,
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: but it's always when he's not around. He knows and
• 42:10
  Speaker 1: doesn't seem bothered by it. My question is this, are
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: these young whipper snappers right? Even though I don't feel
• 42:17
  Speaker 1: I identify at all with being by there is something there.
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: It's just not something I can explore. While in my
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: current relationship, and while we aren't married, we planned to
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: be together for the long haul. I can't imagine my
• 42:28
  Speaker 1: life with anyone else. What do I do if anything? Sarah? Well,
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: first I would say, don't let two girls in a
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: coffee shop convince you that you're interested in fucking them
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: when you're in a perfectly happy relationship just because they
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: may be interested in fucking you. Uh, That's the first thing,
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: doesn't seem I mean, if someone comes up to you
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: and says I think you might be attractive, even if
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: it were a man, and said I think you love
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: me and you don't know it yet, what's your response
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: to that? Exactly? And listen, First of all, I watch
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: girl on girl porn too. I love girl on girl
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: porn like that is where and I'm not a lesbian.
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: But I've also been with women, not in a relationship,
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: but I've experimented with women sexually, and everyone's a little by.
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: Of course you're a little by, honestly, even I am,
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: even I am, I had girlfriends, Yeah, exactly, even Bretton
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: is by. Okay, so there you have it. Everyone's a
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: little bit by. But it's more of like your you
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: call this person your soul mate, like that's then that's
• 43:30
  Speaker 1: your answer, that's your guy. And these aren't feelings that
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: were born in your mind. They were feelings that were
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: brought to you by two people that you work with,
• 43:38
  Speaker 1: and that therefore I declare them invalid. Breton also like
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: gen Z just loves calling everybody gay, so honestly, it's
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: it's just probably like the gen Z nous that that's
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: telling you that you're gay, because everyone that's in gen
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: Z like swears everyone's gay honestly, so yeah, don't listen
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: to them. Yeah. I feel like gen Z is the
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: first generation that gets that it's just sexuality as a
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: false spectrum, Like it's just you know, you can be
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: in a straight man and woman relationship, but like that
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: doesn't necessarily mean that you're not queer. It just means like,
• 44:12
  Speaker 1: for somebody who does have those feelings. It just means
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: that like you did find your person, but also, like,
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: how do you look by? Like you know what I mean? Panies?
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: I think crocs, crocs for sure? Like what is because
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: like I feel like there's a gala lesbian love everything
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: between what is a by love? You know, Well, there's
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: not going to be a look for by in a
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: twenty more years because everyone is gonna be by and
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: it's gonna be like you know, like I could easily
• 44:40
  Speaker 1: be turned on by a woman. I could definitely be
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: sexually turned on by a woman. I don't want to
• 44:44
  Speaker 1: be in a relationship with a woman. I want to
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: be in a relationship with Joe. So like, yeah, you
• 44:49
  Speaker 1: could work around and have sex with a bunch of people,
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: but that doesn't sound like it's going to be good
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: for your relationship, especially if you aren't by yet. If
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: you're straight and you start working around, it doesn't work
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: well with straight people. Well, they have to acclimate to
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: that mindset, and that's an open door policy, wide open yes.
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: So I think Sarah, like keep watching girl on girl
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: porn and watch your girls on girl porn and think
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: about those two baristas at your coffee place if you
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: need to, but don't let it go any further than that. Perfect.
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: Don't you feel like everybody's bisexual? Oh? I absolutely do this. Okay,
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: so this is a very interesting thing. So there's a
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: young woman in my life who is like middle teens
• 45:28
  Speaker 1: sort of exploring the dating world, and her dad, who
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: is in his four like mid forties, he was sort
• 45:35
  Speaker 1: of like, yeah, you know, she has a little girlfriend,
• 45:39
  Speaker 1: but like, it's just a phase, and and it it
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: felt so outdated to me to think about it as
• 45:45
  Speaker 1: a phase when it's like, no, like she likes girls,
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: and you know, we'll see where she winds up. But
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: it just was interesting to me. Yeah. Well, I think
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: anybody over fifty, you know, any male over a fifty
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: that's why is usually doesn't understand what's happening, Like they don't.
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: Women are a little bit more understanding of like, okay,
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: things need to change, whereas men are like, hmmmm, they
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: just don't want to be a part of it. That
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: they don't even necessarily have a problem with it, but
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: they don't want to be involved actively right writing it off. Yeah,
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: and yeah, and that that's like as soon as you
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: think like, oh, this is too much for me to understand,
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: you kind of have to be like, Okay, listen if
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: you want to be a full person, especially if you
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: have a child like that. I know it's they say
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: it's hard for men to accept their daughters being lesbians.
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: It's like, fuck off, Fuck the funk off. It's hard
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: for you. Why are you fucking your daughter who gives
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: a ship? Yeah, why do you have a problem, Like
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: it's harder for men. Everything is so hard for men
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: all the time. Yeah, And it's also like being a
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: lesbian is like the safest relationship your daughter could be in.
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: Like you, what about you, Bretman? When you came out?
• 46:51
  Speaker 1: Did you come out to your parents or did they know?
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: I actually don't have a coming out story. My mom
• 46:57
  Speaker 1: always knew I was gay. I feel like when I
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: came out out there like it's the gay. But yeah,
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: my mom always knew I was gay. My dad always
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: knew I was gay. But also like my grandma, going
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: back to her, she explained to my dad that I
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: was like going to be gay, like when I was
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: super young, and so like she was like if you
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: messed with him, like you messed with me type of energy.
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: So I have always been supported. Like my first time
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: going to church, my grandma put blush on me, and
• 47:24
  Speaker 1: I swear I was with the countiest angel in there.
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: And so to be honest, I've always been supported, and
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: it kind of transferred to like my family members. My
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: cousin daughter who is gay now, she just came out
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: and she came up to me. She was like, ohh,
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: I love that I had a gay uncle growing up
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: because it's was so much easier for me to like
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: express myself because we all, like her mom is very
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: religious and so she had a hard time with that.
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: But like now she's fine, Like she's out and proud,
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: and she is out and proud like younger than I was,
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: So that's cool. Also, I a lot of my family
• 47:59
  Speaker 1: member are like gay man, so it's it's cute to
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: have like a lesbian around. Finally everyone needs a lesbian
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: around exactly. Yeah. But also like I have a trance
• 48:11
  Speaker 1: cousin that I grew up with growing up, and so
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: I just grew up surrounded by like such loving accepting
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: people and people themselves. How cool is your grandmother saying
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: like yeah, you you funk with him, You're working with me,
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: Like that's great energy to Brannant. I have reasons to
• 48:29
  Speaker 1: believe that she like put a spell on her pussy
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: because she has seven kids and each one of them
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: has a gay, has a gay each one of them.
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: So my dad has me, my dad's twin has a gay,
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: and then like so on, like all her kids has
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: a gay daughter or a son. Wow, It's it's so weird.
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: And so she has like seven gay cousins. I have
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: seven gay cousins from my dad. It was so from
• 48:52
  Speaker 1: the moment you said I think something was there was
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: a hex put on her pussy or something, it was
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: like deja vu. It was like, I've had this conversation
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: with you before, and you've told me that before, but
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: you never have I knew you were going to say
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: that your brother, your father, his brother, twin brother you said, right.
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: I even knew you were going to say twin brother.
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: It was so deja vu. It was like, yeah, I
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: think I told you that. No, you haven't told you that. No,
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: I have. There's I just grew up with too many
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: of me, So I was just like Grandma's here, Grandma's
• 49:24
  Speaker 1: bear telling us about it. Yeah. Well, our next email
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: comes from Alex and by the way, Alex's twenty eight,
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: and the other person he's talking about here is twenty one.
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: Alex says, I have a large problem, like large penis,
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: like a large problem, like a large one. I've been
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: dating my ex on and off for about three years.
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: We've been together more than we've been apart. I've been
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: struggling so much with possibly getting back together. Wait, hold
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: on on, don't wait, what you're dating your ex? Oh?
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: This one? Your like? Which are you bating? That is?
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: That is the crux of the issue here, Brettman. So
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: I'm really hoping that you can help. We always say
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: that we love each other, we just never worked because
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: we're different people. Lately, through therapy, I learned that I
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: have so much guilt about being gay and having a
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: relationship that this was the reason I broke up with
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: him each time we have both been dating other people,
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: but at the same time having a friends with benefits
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: relationship as well. We've said that we'll stop when someone
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: starts dating someone seriously, but I'm not really actively pursuing
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: anyone because I want to get back together with him.
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: We're being very coupily with our hangouts, like going on
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: friend dates and sleeping in the same bed together, buying
• 50:38
  Speaker 1: each other, dinners, kissing, etcetera. We've had so many good
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: conversations that we would never have had before when we
• 50:45
  Speaker 1: were dating. I think it's because of the work I've
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: done in therapy. I've been thinking about making a grand
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: gesture like rose pedals, getting him a cat that he's
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: always wanted. I'm allergic, by the way, renting a suit,
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: I mean, the whole nine yards. At the same time, though,
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: I don't want to mess up our friendship or make
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: it weird because we do live together. Oh wait, I'm
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: not sure I said that we lived together. He moved
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: in in November. I love him so much, but I
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: just don't want to hurt him, and I don't want
• 51:11
  Speaker 1: to try this again if it's going to end the
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: same way what they moved in together after they broke up.
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: I'm just having such a hard time knowing what to do.
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: Please help, Alex. Is this the same sex couple? Yes,
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say, that's the gayest I've ever heard.
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: Oh my god, kissing, What the kissing is it? Once
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: you're kissing somebody, aren't you together? And living together? Like
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: living together and sleeping with other people while you're with somebody.
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: What is that? Oh my god, I sound like I'm
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: judging you. It's low key I'm jealous, But also what
• 51:46
  Speaker 1: is that, Loki? I am judging you. You need to
• 51:50
  Speaker 1: get your ship together and fucking confront the situation. This
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: is like dilly dallying and keeping everything in a gray area.
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: And as somebody needs to move or somebody needs to
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: have a conversation and then you can maybe stay together
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: and live together if they want to be together. Alex
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: wants to be with him, so we just have to
• 52:09
  Speaker 1: find out if the partner, the ex boyfriend, who is that?
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: I could not get over that? Well, yeah, yeah, they
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: need to Just you have to nip this in the bud.
• 52:20
  Speaker 1: And I don't under I want people behave this way
• 52:23
  Speaker 1: and don't face a situation head on. I get frustrated
• 52:27
  Speaker 1: because you are post You are postponing your reality. Yes,
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: you are postponing your future. You are postponing your reality
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: in the hopes that this person is going to come around.
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: Maybe they've already come around. Just put it out there,
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: I have the conversation, and also be ready to accept
• 52:43
  Speaker 1: that it might not go your way, and then you
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: have to find a new roommate. Jesus. Yeah, it sounds
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: like they kind of already are that couple that he
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: wants to be. It sounds like there is completely in
• 52:54
  Speaker 1: a relationship that they're living together, Like are they living
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: in separate rooms? I don't know the answer to that.
• 53:00
  Speaker 1: But you know what I noticed too, that there's actually
• 53:02
  Speaker 1: like people out there who loves and thrive off like
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: toxic relationships. I don't know, I think I've watched it
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: for you, but it's getting like Maddie and Nate vibe
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: like they know they're not good for each other, but
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: they love the toxickness of it, Like that's what that's
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: what the relationship thrives off. I don't get it personally,
• 53:22
  Speaker 1: but if that works for you, Alex, Like he says
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: he doesn't get it personally, this is someone who got
• 53:27
  Speaker 1: back together with his act seven or eight times. I
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: don't get anymore personally. Straight up, Yeah, straight up, I
• 53:38
  Speaker 1: used to get it. You need to get your ship together, Alex.
• 53:40
  Speaker 1: Get your ship together, okay, and treat this situation with dignity,
• 53:44
  Speaker 1: and it deserves to be treated with dignity, and skating
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: around the issue is undignified. Just have a face to
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: face conversation, be prepared for the news that you don't
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: want to hear. Even though it sounds like you're already
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: in a relationship with this person, I'm more confused than
• 53:58
  Speaker 1: I was before you read that, lad or so suck it. Also,
• 54:01
  Speaker 1: don't put the cat in that situation hat Like, oh
• 54:06
  Speaker 1: my god, that is my biggest Yeah, if you want
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: to be with this person, like, don't get a cat
• 54:11
  Speaker 1: that you're allergic to, exactly like this, you're allergic to
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: the person already, You're gonna get another thing you're allergic
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: to the girl. Yeah, my prediction is if you don't
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: say anything and you get this cat, you're going to
• 54:21
  Speaker 1: be the one looking for a new place because you're
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: gonna have a bad reaction to that cat and then
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: nothing's going to go your way. So definitely, don't buy
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: make any grand gestures until you get the answer that
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: you guys are going to continue being in a relationship
• 54:35
  Speaker 1: and it's a cat and nobody wants that. Nobody wants that. Well,
• 54:41
  Speaker 1: let's take a quick break and we'll be back with
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: Brettman and Chelsea. I need a fucking break after that
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: convoluted email, and we're back. Brettman had a peepee break.
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: He had a shower a break. Do you have to
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: do any pottery or anything. No, I just have to
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: walk my dogs. Well, yeah, I have two new dogs,
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: can sam. I have four dogs now I don't have them,
• 55:10
  Speaker 1: they're out right now, but I have like all the
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: bulldog family. I have a pibble Terrier, I have a
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: shorty bull, I have a pocket people and a French bulldog. Oh.
• 55:19
  Speaker 1: You know, French bulldogs are like all the rage right
• 55:22
  Speaker 1: now and Stanley well, and not in a good way.
• 55:25
  Speaker 1: People are stealing French bulldogs off of people in San
• 55:28
  Speaker 1: Francisco because so many people have French bulldogs that people
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: will go out and their dogs are being kidnapped and
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: then sold on the black market for ten or fifteen
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: thousand dollars. People are buying French bulldogs. French bulldog. Yeah,
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: that's I think that's to be fair. I would I
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: would probably dog not burn and berneithe as well, so
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: I do see where they're coming. Well, by the way,
• 55:49
  Speaker 1: you would have to because they have as a little
• 55:51
  Speaker 1: inclination to move as anybody as a vegetable, so you
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: would have you would have to kidnap them, just like
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: I have to kidnap them. I would just dress up
• 55:59
  Speaker 1: as your house peper, honestly, because they go to her. Well,
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: those are some big shoes to fill, so we'll get
• 56:04
  Speaker 1: we'll get you the right outfit. Yeah, they're pretty freaking
• 56:06
  Speaker 1: cute though, My dogs, they're so cute. I could I
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: could never get like hairy dogs. I I don't know,
• 56:13
  Speaker 1: how do you like have to like clean everything all
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: the time. Well, and even with my short hair dogs,
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: their hairs everywhere already, I can't imagine. Well, that's the thing.
• 56:22
  Speaker 1: Some long hair dogs don't shed. They shed like twice
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: a year, So these dogs actually don't shed that badly.
• 56:27
  Speaker 1: It's short hair dogs shed more in some instances. But
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: my dogs, no, I don't brush their fucking hair. Let's
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: be honest. I'm not doing any of that stuff. But
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: they are getting that stuff done to them. But last
• 56:38
  Speaker 1: night Bert took a shdubi in the kitchen, and I
• 56:42
  Speaker 1: know that was a sign that was saying fuck you,
• 56:44
  Speaker 1: because he doesn't ever go shudubi at night. It's only
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: in the morning and the daytime. But he went in
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: the kitchen like left it in there. Because Joe came
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: home late last night and I was already asleep, and
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: that was his way of saying, there's too much commotion
• 56:56
  Speaker 1: going on funk this ship. He usually sleeps in the
• 56:59
  Speaker 1: bed with me, but when Joe's there, I don't have
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: him in the bed because Joe doesn't understand why dogs
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: are in the bed. He said, you can have it
• 57:05
  Speaker 1: whatever makes you happy, and I was like, well, Bert
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: makes me happy, and He's like, yeah, so why don't
• 57:10
  Speaker 1: you go fucking sleep upstairs and Bert can sleep down here.
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: All I wanted to do is wake up with Bert's
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: soft for. You know, I want to put my hand
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: down and feel that soft for That's how I want
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: to wake up every single day. Yeah, honestly, I left
• 57:25
  Speaker 1: with my dog for the first time in like a
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: couple of months because the girl she was always like
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: doing stuff in the middle of the night. But like
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: last night, she did so good, like we actually cuddled.
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: I don't sleep with all of my dogs. I also
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: don't want to wake up smelling like a dog every day.
• 57:38
  Speaker 1: But yeah, I love my dogs. I'm such a dog person.
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: Did you always have like dogs going up, Miss Chelsea?
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: I always Yeah, we always had dogs always MutS and rescues,
• 57:48
  Speaker 1: you know, like weird dogs that were just like half wolf,
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: half German shepherd or some mixture. But I always loved
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: chows because they look like teddy bears and they are.
• 57:59
  Speaker 1: They look like real live bears that are just beading
• 58:02
  Speaker 1: around your house. They're so fucking cute. And I've had
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: these dogs for I don't know how many long how
• 58:07
  Speaker 1: many years, but I just cannot They never become less cute,
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean. They stay cute. A dog
• 58:14
  Speaker 1: has to have such a shitty personality to become less cute,
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: and I've met dogs like that. That dog. Yeah, it's
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: always the ankle bikers, always the ankle bite and the Pomeranians,
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: like they're adorable when they're groomed and they have and
• 58:28
  Speaker 1: then their personality sucks. It's like you don't like anyone
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: but your owner. Then I, yeah, I have nothing for you.
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: So and they they get really old and they really
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: look like they're decaying sometimes, Like have you seen like
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: really old like small dogs before? Not to talk about them,
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: but I'm just like, girl, put this girl out of
• 58:46
  Speaker 1: her misery, like her eyes are popping out, like her tongue, yeah,
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: having out of her nostro Like, yeah, sometimes you can
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: put dogs down a little bit earlier, especially if they
• 58:56
  Speaker 1: start to look bad. Yeah, my neighbor had a dog
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: like that, and it was exactly like exactly like you said,
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: like I think it's eyes were gone, like it couldn't walk.
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: It was like I think he said it was nineteen
• 59:05
  Speaker 1: years old something crazy, And I like, I just was
• 59:09
  Speaker 1: like this, this dog is not having fun being alive
• 59:11
  Speaker 1: because you go to the bat and they're like, he's
• 59:15
  Speaker 1: totally healthy. Yeah. Well, Brettman, did you have a piece
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: of advice you'd like to ask for from Chelsea? Yes,
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: actually I have I need to ask for two advice actually,
• 59:27
  Speaker 1: because um, I really admire Miss Chelsea's work. I really do,
• 59:31
  Speaker 1: and right now I am I'm wanting to write a
• 59:34
  Speaker 1: book and I know you have like six best sellers
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: are who really is counting these days? So I would say, like,
• 59:40
  Speaker 1: how do you not run out of things to write about,
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: Miss Chelsea? Because I feel like I feel like I
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: don't even have anything to write about it anymore. Oh well,
• 59:48
  Speaker 1: you well, if you're in the process of writing or
• 59:51
  Speaker 1: getting close to finishing something, that's how you always feel
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: like you'll never be able to write another thing or
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: write anything. But just trust your life experience is what's
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: going to give you the material to always have something
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: to talk about everything that's going on with you. You
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: know what I mean, You're never going to run out
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 1: of that, So just don't even put that in your head.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 1: Just know like there's more coming down the pike. You
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 1: have like this huge, busy life. It's material every single day,
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 1: and when you get to a place where you're ready
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: to go do it again, you start to draw from
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 1: all that. And even when something great or a funny
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 1: story happens to you, or a funny experience or something
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: outlandish or crazy, just make sure you're like make it,
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 1: like have a note section in your phone to write
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 1: things down, because you'll be surprised. All I need is
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 1: one sentence and I can write a chapter about it.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 1: And when you're a creative, that's almost everyone can do it.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: It's just that so many people don't try to do it.
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 1: So writing a book is a very I think natural
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 1: thing for anyone, especially anyone with a big personality likes
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 1: to share and likes to talk about themselves. It's no problem.
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 1: What is your your favorite book that you wrote, Like
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 1: out of all the books you've written, Like, what is
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 1: like the one my most recent book would be Life
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: would be the Death of Me, but it's always my
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: most recent book. That's my favorite. That felt like it
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: had my humor, but it also was deep and profound,
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: and it helped people, and it showed aside to me
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 1: that I've grown up with my whole life, but I
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 1: didn't know no one else had seen. So it was
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: really kind of nice to share that with my fans
• 1:01:20
  Speaker 1: and people and have the reaction. So that's definitely my best,
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: my best work, I think. I love that. Oh my gosh. Wait.
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: My second advice actually I kind of already hinted it earlier,
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 1: but I want to do a podcast with my sister, Like,
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 1: do you have any tips for like future podcasters? You know, yeah,
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: well you got to do it with your sister. I
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: mean who else would you do it with. First of all,
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 1: you guys need me a Catherine. I need me a Catherine.
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 1: I mean just you have to look at it like this.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 1: People want more than what they're getting from you, right,
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: They want to hear more between you and your sister,
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 1: and you guys can get someone like Catherine to kind
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 1: of oversee it so that there's somebody moving the ship.
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: Forward or that role can be played by your sister,
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 1: certainly not by you, as you've demonstrated today that you
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 1: can't run a podcast. But just keep in mind like
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: people want more, right, they want to listen to more.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 1: They love the way you talk, they love the way
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 1: you converse, they love the dynamics between the two of you.
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: So don't put a lot of pressure on yourself. Just
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 1: go and have fun conversations with her. You can pick
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 1: any topics you want, or not pick any topics at all,
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 1: and just shoot the ship. And then when you feel
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 1: like you want to add another layer, out another layer.
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 1: But yeah, just be like, do what people love from you,
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: which is talking. I can't wait to build my set.
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 1: I was thinking yellow velvet curtains. How interesting. We can
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 1: just send you these. Okay, you need you need a
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 1: new set of curtains anyway. So uh well, Brettman, you're
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: just a delight as always. Oh I'm gonna hit you
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 1: up when we come back to Hawaii. Oh my gosh,
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 1: I'm bored. Yeah no, well hang out. Yeah, you, me
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 1: and Joe Boy, we're gonna have a whole We're bringing
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: a whole gaggle of people there. Don't say goggles. I saw,
• 1:02:59
  Speaker 1: I saw you toward d bitch. You better give me
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 1: a ticket when you get here. I'm not fighting for
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: their tickets. No, you'll get your own ticket. You'll get
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 1: your own V I P box even though there aren't
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 1: any of those. Please, I'm kidding, Batman. We love you.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much, guys. Continued success and everything that
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 1: you do and good luck with your new doggies. Thank you.
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 1: I need it. Loha allaha, maha kita everybody. We have
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: new merch. We have Dear Chelsea merch which you can
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: order on my website Chelsea handler dot com. And we
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: have cute t shirts and cute hats and yeah, go
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 1: and get some. And if you like to get advice
• 1:03:40
  Speaker 1: from Chelsea and one of her guests, please write into
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 1: Dear Chelsea Project at gmail dot com