Latest / RiseUp - Live Joy Your Way / Breaking Free from the Lie of Normalcy

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Breaking Free from the Lie of Normalcy · RiseUp - Live Joy Your Way

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Today's episode is produced by my friends at Walk West.
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  SPEAKER_00: If you're looking to grow your brand and generate leads through podcast or video production, head over to walkwest.com.
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  SPEAKER_00: Okay, let's start the show.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_01: Rise up, live joy your way.
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_01: From emotional intelligence through cognitive distortions, certified life and wellness coach Comedy Wood is on a mission to help people see the magnificence of their own unique human spirit.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: Through these small bites of self-visualization and self-confidence, you can have healthy relationships, success in business and career, and live the life you want to live.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_01: Rise up, live joy your way.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: Hi there, and welcome to another episode of Rise Up, Live Joy Your Way.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: Whether it's morning, afternoon, or evening, thank you for taking some time out of your day to be here with me.
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  SPEAKER_00: And today we're going to be tackling something that I feel that it probably is something that either we have felt as we were younger, or we might be dealing with our own adolescents or young adults.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: But a lot of adolescents and young adults struggle with the lie of being normal.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: And what do I even mean about that?
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  SPEAKER_00: So there's this sneaky pressure to conform to what society says we should be doing, even when it doesn't feel good or true for us.
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  SPEAKER_00: Because really what it is is it's there's this idea of societal normalcy.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so a lot of young adults feel like they have to conform to that in order to be accepted.
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  SPEAKER_00: So, like for instance, drinking in college, everyone does it, right?
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  SPEAKER_00: And so the expectation is, well, then I should do it too.
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  SPEAKER_00: And if I choose not to, then maybe there's something wrong with me.
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  SPEAKER_00: Or even adults, you know, this idea that we're supposed to get married and have children by a certain age, and could be that we're not normal if we don't do that.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_00: So let's start with the adolescents and young adults first.
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  SPEAKER_00: So just picture this you're in college and every weekend the parties are flowing with alcohol, and maybe you're someone who doesn't really like to drink, or maybe you come from a family where alcoholism was a thing.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: And so you've you really would like to be sober.
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  SPEAKER_00: Or maybe it makes you sick, but the voice in your head says you should just do it because it's normal.
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  SPEAKER_00: Everyone drinks in college.
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  SPEAKER_00: So you pour yourself a drink and you know that it doesn't feel aligned for you.
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  SPEAKER_00: And yet you do it anyway, and there's this disconnect within yourself.
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  SPEAKER_00: This is such a common experience.
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  SPEAKER_00: We get tricked into thinking that if we're not doing what everyone else is doing, there's something wrong with us.
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  SPEAKER_00: And so we go into this shame spiral.
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  SPEAKER_00: But the the truth is, it's not about whether drinking is right or wrong, it's about what's right for you.
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  SPEAKER_00: This lie of normalcy pushes you to do something that isn't aligned with yourself.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: We can move into adults, right?
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: So I was mentioning before that sometimes, and this has come up in my own client conversations, is you know, there's a normal expectation of the progression of adulthood.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: So for some adults, one of the common normal things that people talk about is, well, I'm supposed to get married and have kids by a certain age.
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  SPEAKER_00: Because there's this picture that's been painted of what a successful adult looks like.
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  SPEAKER_00: You know, so it's somebody who hits these certain milestones, the steady job, the partner, the kids, you know, the house, the maybe the dog or the cat.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: But what happens when that's not your reality?
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  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you found, maybe you haven't found the right person.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_00: You know, maybe you don't even want kids.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe you feel like there's something wrong with you then for wanting a different path, or maybe you feel like there's something wrong with you because you haven't found the partner that fully aligns with you.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_00: So you go on these endless dates and you try to force connections, or you stay in a relationship that isn't right with you because you think you're supposed to.
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  SPEAKER_00: And the whole time there's this quiet voice inside saying, this doesn't feel right.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: And so this lie of normal creates this false narrative that your worth is tied to how well you follow the script.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: So I want to just say here's the reminder maybe there isn't a script because there's no script for your authenticity, and your worth is defined by how closely your life aligns to your values, not in not alignment with society or what is considered normal.
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  SPEAKER_00: So, how do we break free from this?
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: How do we break free from this lie of normalcy?
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  SPEAKER_00: Well, it starts with the first thing that I always say it's awareness.
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  SPEAKER_00: You have to ask yourself, is this truly what I want?
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  SPEAKER_00: Or what I think I should want.
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  SPEAKER_00: And when you start to notice the places where you're living out of out of alignment, you can begin to make the choices that honor your truth instead of society's expectations.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_00: So, for example, if you're in college and you don't want to drink, give yourself permission to say no.
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  SPEAKER_00: I know that it might feel hard, but I also want you to understand that there are other people who feel the same way.
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  SPEAKER_00: Or if you're an adult and you're feeling pressured to get married or to have kids, take a step back and ask yourself, what is it that I truly want in a relationship?
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  SPEAKER_00: Because maybe it really is true that you do want to get married, but you just haven't found the person who will fully compliment you.
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  SPEAKER_00: And there's nothing wrong with you for taking your time and also for not getting into a relationship or a marriage when it's not fully aligned with you.
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  SPEAKER_00: So when you truth, when you choose your truth over what's considered normal, you also give yourself not only are you giving yourself permission to live your authentic life, you're actually showing others that it's possible to do the same.
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  SPEAKER_00: The lie of normal is just that, it's a lie, it's a story.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's a story that's been concocted.
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  SPEAKER_00: And as long as we keep telling ourselves that story, then we stay stuck in the story.
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  SPEAKER_00: And you have the chance to rewrite the story that you're living.
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  SPEAKER_00: You're allowed to write your own story.
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  SPEAKER_00: You're allowed to make choices that reflect who you truly are.
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  SPEAKER_00: You're allowed to decide what works for you and what doesn't.
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  SPEAKER_00: And the people in your life that don't accept that might not be the healthiest people for you to be around.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I know that's a really hard thing to say and to potentially hear, but they may not be your people.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: Normal isn't the goal.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: It's about being truthful and then truthful about yourself to yourself.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: Because when you choose to be authentic, you are then able to create the life that you want for yourself and not one that you think you should have.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: If you'd like to chat about this or anything else, and you feel like coaching could be something that could support you in developing and creating the life that you want for yourself, feel free to book a time with me at any time with coachwithcomedy.com.
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  SPEAKER_00: And until next time, stay welcome.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for listening to Rise Up, Live Joy Your Way.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: For more information, book a chat with comedy at www.chatwithcomedy.com.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_01: Or visit her website at www.comedywood.com.
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  SPEAKER_01: You can also find comedy on Facebook or Instagram.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_01: Username it's authenticme.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for listening.