Latest / The Daily Ripples Podcast / August 28 – Sharing What Helped Me

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August 28 – Sharing What Helped Me · The Daily Ripples Podcast

• 0:00
  Are we ready?
• 0:01
  Yes, sir.
• 0:02
  All right.
• 0:02
  All right, before you launch into that, though, I'll say, I'm going to start doing a collection.
• 0:07
  Uh, the audio clips and one of these days, the post-pod is going to be just back to back to back to back.
• 0:15
  Corey clearing his throat before he starts talking on a reporting.
• 0:28
  But
• 0:39
  But
• 0:46
  As you were saying, It's funny.
• 0:51
  August 28th.
• 0:53
  And also today's August 28th, but we got Steffani, our friend on here, and it's really cool to have people on here to talk about this stuff, because it's really important. And, you know, it's changed my life and, you know, having these conversations and doing this, right?
• 1:08
  Because, like, what we're doing is grown understanding of what we know. And because I think all 3 of us, we do this work. And if you're listening and you're doing this work, you know, that's how we learn how to be better and grow and understand and effect in this.
• 1:19
  Um, but yeah, anyways, today is August 28th and um, sharing what helped me in the stone.
• 1:27
  God can use even the painful parts of my story to bring hope and healing to others.
• 1:33
  Ripple one practical today.
• 1:36
  Today, I will not be ashamed of where I've been.
• 1:37
  The struggles I faced may become encouragement for someone else.
• 1:42
  When I share honestly, burdens open become lighter for everyone involved.
• 1:47
  Ripple 2 spiritual, as I share my story with humility, the Holy Spirit uses it to encourage others.
• 1:55
  The father wastes nothing in my life, even my failures and wounds, and Jesus transformed suffering into a source of hope and redemption.
• 2:04
  Man, I didn't really read this fully through.
• 2:07
  I didn't know what we were talking about, but now I do.
• 2:09
  I kind of was.
• 2:12
  And yet you just said, you hits prepared.
• 2:15
  Oh, I had notes and everything, but now I'm, you know, thinking of something, you know, but that's the, that's an issue.
• 2:20
  I find in myself, at least, and I'm trying to learn to be better with this, you know, sharing and how I, um, my approach to others.
• 2:29
  And that's that's the one of the biggest things I think about in my life is how I approach others.
• 2:34
  How can I be more useful?
• 2:36
  Because on page 19, or the top of page 20 and bottom of page 19 in the, the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous.
• 2:45
  It says, most of us since they're real tolerant with people's shortcomings and viewpoints and respect for their opinions or attitudes, which make us more useful to others.
• 2:55
  Our very lives as x-problem drinkers depend, depends a big word, upon our constant thought of others and how we may help their needs, not my needs, their needs.
• 3:06
  So my approach and how it can be more helpful.
• 3:08
  And I find sometimes like when I'm talking and especially after I get in talking about like, you know, a treatment center that's maybe in the hood or talking to some dudes that like I can relate to on a criminal level. You know, I can get a little out of sorts when I'm talking in it to a place that, you know, that you guys hang out at a little bit higher bottom drunks.
• 3:26
  And, you know, I'm not trying to separate.
• 3:29
  But what I'm saying is like, when I start talking about the jail times, this and this and this, because it talks about on page 58, it says our stories disclose in a general way, what we used to be like.
• 3:40
  And that's, and I separate you from my ego because I, you know, when I start talking about this and this and this, that's, that's sometimes my ego.
• 3:48
  It's not always because I'm trying to relate to these dudes, but when I go back into a place where there's fine upstanding citizens where they look like it.
• 3:56
  I've just separated myself from me to you.
• 4:00
  I've separate, like, because only thing that I have really in common with you is when I take a drink, I want more.
• 4:06
  But now I got criminal chargers behind me too.
• 4:09
  So now you're like, whoa, this is a criminal.
• 4:10
  I just had a drinking problem.
• 4:11
  This is not like, you know, so I've already separated it. And my ego, at least, I don't, in most people's ego, separates from me, from you, and it always has, you know, and so, and I don't think he goes bad either, because like me and you would be doing this thing if we didn't have some sort of ego, right?
• 4:31
  I mean, as to some degree, we, you know, I mean, if there was no ego, and I think Gandhi uses that, right?
• 4:37
  God uses our egos and our, you know, whatever, you can call them character defects, I just, we're human and God uses our human things to his benefit.
• 4:47
  I don't get dwelled down.
• 4:49
  That like a silver lining on the cloud.
• 4:52
  God, God, there's a verse in the Bible that said God uses all things for good.
• 4:56
  He has age 28 is what I just pulled up to you.
• 5:00
  Dang, you'd be on top of things.
• 5:01
  Probably can't see it.
• 5:03
  Okay, well, it reads on this wise, as we say.
• 5:06
  Romans 828.
• 5:07
  For we know that God works all things together for good for the ones who love God.
• 5:11
  And that's the common English Bible.
• 5:13
  That's just... look at that.
• 5:14
  works it together.
• 5:15
  That's crazy.
• 5:16
  Yeah.
• 5:17
  But the important thing is it says that God works all things for good.
• 5:20
  It doesn't say that God says all things are good.
• 5:22
  So even the things that are bad, you know, in our past and in our history, are worked for good.
• 5:28
  That's what the scripture is telling me.
• 5:30
  You know, what I got out of what you were talking about earlier, you know, certain people are relatable to certain bottoms or certain situations and that type of thing.
• 5:39
  I've seen that play out in a women's meeting.
• 5:43
  You know, we've, we meet ever, every Saturday.
• 5:46
  We talk about things that are related to women.
• 5:49
  And, you know, being able to share a particular experience for my life.
• 5:55
  be rearing children or, you know, having teenagers or being married, you know, anything that comes with being a woman.
• 6:05
  Um,
• 6:07
  It gives people the opportunity to learn experience that others have.
• 6:12
  To be able to just say, I'm not alone here.
• 6:16
  Like you were talking about differences versus similarities, and I think a lot of people in AA, when they 1st come in, they're looking at the differences.
• 6:24
  Well, I'm unique.
• 6:25
  Well, I'm not going to fit in.
• 6:26
  They have all these excuses and justifications.
• 6:29
  I know I did.
• 6:30
  Um, but what I found was there's a lot of commonality there.
• 6:34
  And regardless of the journey, especially with someone who is successfully walking that journey, um, there's a lot of encouragement and hope.
• 6:45
  Um, so, you know, for me, sharing what I've experienced and what I've gotten out of it, not only fills up my cup because we talked about this a couple days ago, um, but it allows me to see God's goodness in others when they when they get this, when they hear it and go, I really want this.
• 7:07
  Because that person identifies with where my life is gone.
• 7:12
  They've done this.
• 7:15
  Yeah, and I think, like, you know, the some degree, you know, but I just want to, I think, you know, I believe that everything we did up to the point of slipping it from bad to good, right?
• 7:30
  Being a service or just dwelling in it, you know, that, that, then I can use it to God, you know, then I can use it, you know, but if I keep on it, I'm in it, I'm going to just stay in it.
• 7:39
  You know, and I think we get those different
• 7:41
  we come to a turning point, right?
• 7:43
  And that's what we have these different turning points. And I'm sure we all have had different turning points that, you know, maybe, you know, we could blame it on to know there just wasn't willingness, but was I not broken down enough to do it.
• 7:55
  Right.
• 7:56
  And maybe broken down enough for you to do it is dead, right?
• 8:00
  Because maybe that's sober for you.
• 8:01
  And I don't know, but because, like, you know, see people, right?
• 8:05
  I see them all the time.
• 8:06
  I'm tall shirt.
• 8:07
  Well, I mean, I don't see him dead, but I see him before they die, right?
• 8:10
  I'm sure I get the text before they die.
• 8:13
  And, um, and I know what that looks like and I, you know, and it sucks because we're the phone call.
• 8:18
  Yeah, and like, you know, man, it sucks because like it's like, man, if he only had enough willingness.
• 8:22
  Well, and that's the barrier, for some reason to me, um, it's like this thing that, like, you just can't grab them, and it's like, you know, and I don't know what else to do it.
• 8:31
  That's when they need God to give them a psychic change.
• 8:34
  Yeah, but like we, they can't do it. And then like, there's this middle area, right?
• 8:41
  And like, I think that's the thing.
• 8:43
  It's like where, Because so many people die.
• 8:47
  And I think about like, you know, when people come in the rooms, how many people go back out and die versus how many people stay.
• 8:54
  And, you know, then they come back, they come in here and then they're, man, they're hurting. Well, what if that, man, I could, I put responsibility on Alcoholics Anonymous, and we're how the program is today versus, you know, I said, I got kind of harsh in a meeting the other day, and, and you go, but it's a good thing I had to go take care of the baby because everybody argued, argued with me after I talked, because there was a, there was 89 must in the big book of alcoholics anonymous.
• 9:21
  There's a, there's like 91 do not.
• 9:24
  And we want to act like this is suggestive.
• 9:27
  And because, you know, if it's suggestive, but life and death, that's a kind of a weird thing to put it, right?
• 9:34
  Because this is against my, this is going to either save me or kill me, this thing I'm doing.
• 9:40
  And we're going to just say, oh, what's suggestive, and I needed it to be a suggestion.
• 9:44
  Well, man, if it, that, that just doesn't, those 2 don't co exist to me. And to me,
• 9:51
  What do you think?
• 9:52
  Well, for me, I say, you know, what can I control in that situation?
• 9:57
  So they wrote a book and said, hey, we know we can't control that alcoholic.
• 10:01
  We're going to make this suggestive because, you know, he has a choice of his own.
• 10:06
  to make the choice that either gets over or not gets over.
• 10:09
  So... You know, I wasn't willing until I was willing until I hit my bottom till.
• 10:16
  It got to the point where I was ready to stop and couldn't.
• 10:19
  And it took me.
• 10:21
  Trying AA out and going back out, then God, I came back in.
• 10:29
  This is talking, you know, in the devotional today, you know, it starts out, you know, saying that God can use even the painful parts of my story, which, and that's where it's a reminder in this conversation that God's the one using, you know, my story, right?
• 10:43
  That, you know, I share my story, but God's willing uses it.
• 10:46
  I don't control the outcome.
• 10:48
  You know, of that.
• 10:49
  And that's not trying to relieve myself of any type of responsibility of that as quarries over there trying to make scary ghost night faces with a flashlight.
• 10:59
  I don't know what that's all about.
• 11:01
  That'll probably get cut and stuck on the end.
• 11:03
  We have to say for yourself, sir.
• 11:04
  Anyway, in the middle of a serious conversation here.
• 11:08
  Have you no decorum?
• 11:09
  Anyway.
• 11:11
  Um, you know, I was thinking about a conversation that, you know, whenever we 1st all gathered here, you know, tonight to record this week's worth of episodes, and, and just, you know, we were in a, in my study, you know, off of the sanctuary at, you know, one of the churches that I served, but we walked through and Corey and I were talking about, and he was asking me because he saw, you know, the front of the sanctuary and the setup and kind of, I was talking a little bit about how we do service, and he said,
• 11:41
  man, how do you keep that from, you know, going through your ego?
• 11:45
  And I said, oh, I can't let it.
• 11:47
  You know, I can't let it get to my head.
• 11:49
  I mean, because that would be dangerous for me, you know, on a number of levels to let that get to my head.
• 11:54
  But the way that, um, that I, that I avoid that, and and you started out talking about ego, and everybody has a little bit of ego, and it could be a good thing or a bad thing.
• 12:04
  But the key is what the spiritual ripple today said that as I share my story with humility, the Holy Spirit uses it to encourage others.
• 12:12
  So again, I'm not the one using my story.
• 12:15
  I'm sharing it with humility.
• 12:17
  My higher power is the one who uses my story just as the higher power God can use the painful parts of my story because I got a lot of painful parts to my story, you know?
• 12:28
  I grew up in a church and then as soon as I hit, you know, 18, I decided that I didn't need any of that.
• 12:34
  And so that began about of, I haven't done the math, but I think, you know, between, you know, somewhere between 15 and 20 years of, you know, going out and professing, you know, atheism and arguing with people who were Christian and things of that nature.
• 12:48
  And then, you know, God used even in the midst of one painful season of my life and somebody sitting in an office that I had to work in, that I would rather have been remote at the time too, I'm sure, Steffani.
• 12:59
  But, you know, somebody else sitting across from having one of these many arguments about faith, and they stopped me by asking, well, what makes you think that you know more about it than the 1000000000s of other people that have had faith in the past? And that got my attention and got me thinking, you know, um, that person was sharing their experience, and it caused me to think.
• 13:19
  And it caused, you know, God to take root in my head and lead me back into a church.
• 13:25
  And then when I, but I was still drinking heavily and I was still doing lots of other, um, to use church words, sinful things, you know, out in the world.
• 13:33
  But I went back into church and that's where I found people who were in recovery that were there to catch me at the place when I fell completely off, you know, any kind of wagon, you want to call it, and and hit my rock bottom, you know, all those years ago.
• 13:49
  And I'm just so thankful that in whatever way he used, whatever season of my painful past it was that God called me back into a place where I could be caught at that time when I fell, because me out there living and doing on my own, that wouldn't have been the case.
• 14:06
  On page 133.
• 14:09
  It says, we cannot subscribe to the belief that this life is available tears.
• 14:16
  So it once was just that for many of us, but it's clear that we made our own misery.
• 14:22
  God didn't do it.
• 14:24
  Avoid then the deliberate manufacturer misery, but if trouble comes, cheerfully capitalizing as an opportunity to demonstrate his omnipotence.
• 14:33
  And so like, when I look at that, and like, what a cool deal, right?
• 14:38
  Because like, how many problems?
• 14:40
  Well, Steffani's familiar with my home life.
• 14:45
  But, you know, what, how, what a cool deal because, you know, some people come up to us and they're like, hey, what do y'all do? Like, you know, y'all's relationship so good.
• 14:55
  And like they have no idea about our history, right?
• 14:58
  And like, you know, what a cool deal with me and her are able to help them.
• 15:02
  in that sense.
• 15:02
  And you know, you know, I talked about this kind of early on, you know, but what's the center of that?
• 15:07
  The center of that's God.
• 15:08
  Right.
• 15:09
  And, you know, it's, and so like, and it's interesting in the 3rd step prayer.
• 15:13
  It says, take away my difficulties to bear witness to those I could help, right?
• 15:19
  And then it says, take away the defects that, you know, standing away from, you know, me and my fellows and some defects and difficulties and help me be of use to, and when I have those, help me be abused with them.
• 15:33
  So like, you know, it's all these things, you know, pointing to that.
• 15:37
  And it's never, I say this a lot.
• 15:39
  It's never me trying to be this person on this video game.
• 15:43
  Um, trying to be the, that had the cheat code for this player.
• 15:47
  Um, and like what a lot of people, when I take through the work that have lives,
• 15:52
  Today I do this because how big a prayer is in my family's life today, right?
• 15:58
  Um, on page 63, it, after the 3rd step, it's so weird how this works, right?
• 16:05
  Because like if you got the 3rd step prayer.
• 16:07
  And what I have a gentleman read before I do a 3rd step prayer is the paragraph after.
• 16:13
  Because the paragraph after says we found it very desirable to take the spiritual step with an understanding person, such as our wife, best friend, or spiritual advisor.
• 16:23
  That's weird how it says it after the 3rd set prayer, right?
• 16:26
  But I give them that option. Because then it goes on to say, but it's better to meet God alone than with one who might misunderstand.
• 16:33
  So like, I tell them, go read that at your house.
• 16:37
  And when we meet back out, if you want to do this prayer with me, cool.
• 16:41
  But what I've been doing a lot of is, you know, I'll do the prayer with them. And if they have, if they're in a marriage or whatever, I'll say, hey, man, when you get home, read this over with your wife.
• 16:51
  Because it says, 1st person that says, we found it very desirable to take this spiritual step with an understanding person, such as our wife.
• 16:59
  1st person it says.
• 17:01
  Or, you know, vice versa with hug, better, whatever, or... I definitely want to have a wife.
• 17:07
  That's all fine.
• 17:08
  I don't like her.
• 17:09
  like her husband.
• 17:10
  Oh yes, that's true.
• 17:11
  We have mid.
• 17:12
  So, but I think that's so important of like bringing God, you know, that's the only suggestion I have in a relationship for people in relationship is what is, you know, what is your prayer life?
• 17:23
  What does God look like in your life?
• 17:25
  Because, you know, that is the center point of our lives and helping others is too.
• 17:29
  So if I, but without that, like, I don't know, I have no suggestion.
• 17:33
  If they if people aren't willing to do that.
• 17:35
  then they're not willing, and that's kind of goes on to way of sponsorship anyways, right?
• 17:40
  Because are you willing to do these things, help others.
• 17:43
  And every morning do this.
• 17:45
  Because if you're not, we're wasting our time anyways.
• 17:48
  I don't know, but that was a little harsh, but... It looks good.
• 17:53
  Yeah, Steffani, do you have any final thoughts on this one today?
• 17:57
  I will say that just, I know Corey and I both really appreciate you being here, you know, for our episodes this week and it's always good to have a different, you know, insight and perspective from the other side of the room that, uh, well, I don't know.
• 18:12
  You may hear of some of the secondhand, but I don't usually hear about because my wife's not in the program or one of us.
• 18:17
  And so, but we really appreciate you being here with us this week.
• 18:19
  Thanks for the invite.
• 18:21
  I love being on us.
• 18:22
  Love doing this with you guys.
• 18:23
  Well, prayer.
• 18:25
  Father God, help me use my experiences to bring hope to others.
• 18:31
  Through your Holy Spirit, give me the courage to share honestly and compassionately.
• 18:35
  Shape my life through the example of Jesus.
• 18:39
  Amen.