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Best of The Ben Maller Show · The Ben Maller Show

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  Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to the best of the Ben Maller
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: Show podcast. Be sure to catch us live every weeknight
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  Speaker 1: from 2 to 6 Eastern, 11 p.m. to 3 a.m.
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  Speaker 1: Pacific on Fox Sports Radio. And to find your local
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: station for the Ben Maller Show at foxsportsradio.com. You can
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: find it there or stream us live every night on
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app by searching FSR.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: This is the best of the Ben Maller Show on
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  Speaker 2: Fox Sports Radio.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: I've been told by many people today, my phone was
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: very active, and I have been told that I must
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: lead with this story. And I was really debating. I
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: was like, well, there's so many great stories going on
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  Speaker 1: in sports, and I have full editorial control doing the
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  Speaker 1: overnight show to figure out what I want to talk about.
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: If I was doing a daytime show, I'd have to
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: do the same boring topics. But at night, we have freedom.
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  Speaker 1: And so I was like, oh, you know, I can
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  Speaker 1: talk about it. Yeah, we're free. We don't get paid,
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: but we're free. You know, we do get paid, but
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: not as much as the daytime people. So it's a
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: give and take. Life's all about give and take. So
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  Speaker 1: it turns out, though, I will give the people what
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: they want. The customer is always right. So our lead
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: this hour is from Pro Bouncy Ball. Oh, why are
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: you talking about basketball? Oh, no, not again, Maller. Yeah. Well,
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: I was in the lab minding my own business, working
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: on some things. My Phone was on airplane mode so
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  Speaker 1: I could have laser-like focus on future content opportunities. And
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: then all of a sudden, I turned my phone out
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: of airplane.
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  Speaker 3: Mode and boo, boo, boo, boo, boo, boo, boo.
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  Speaker 1: Just like that. Over and over and over. And my
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  Speaker 1: phone starts blowing up.
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  Speaker 3: You got a message.
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  Speaker 2: I thought, boy, I.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: I'm very popular. All of us. I mean, what did
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: I do? Did I say something on the show last
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: night that got me in trouble? I was like, no,
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: I didn't really do anything. Anything that interesting, kind of boring.
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: And then, well, then I figured somebody else, somebody had died.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: You know, that's usually what happens. I recall the day
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: that Kobe Bryant died, that my phone blew up. I
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: was like, oh, my God, what had happened? Or maybe
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: we were going to war, some kind of war.
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  Speaker 3: No, no, no.
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  Speaker 1: I assume you've heard by now, but perhaps not. Maybe
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  Speaker 1: you live in a van down by the river. So
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  Speaker 1: the NBA, after a story popped up a couple weeks
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  Speaker 1: ago saying that there would be no real punishment, and
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  Speaker 1: that is what we'd heard all along, that the NBA
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  Speaker 1: was very concerned about opening up Pandora's box. Well, it
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  Speaker 1: turned out that the NBA, in the end, decided to
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: do the old switcheroo, the crazy Ivan, and they went
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: full mollywop. They mollywopped the good ship clip with penalties for,
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  Speaker 1: they're calling it salary cap circumvention, which is just money
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  Speaker 1: under the table and all that. They claim they found
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: a pattern of misconduct and multiple significant rules violations involving
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  Speaker 1: the claw. Kawhi Leonard. Now, I did look at the
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  Speaker 1: CompuBox stats now that the fight is over. And if
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  Speaker 1: you look at the CompuBox stats, power punches, $ 30 million fine,
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: and not one, not two, not three, not four, but
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  Speaker 1: five first-round picks stripped away from 2029 to 2033, which
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  Speaker 1: seems like that's a long way away, but it's not.
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  Speaker 1: And the owner, Steve Ballmer, was suspended for one year
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  Speaker 1: for helping Kawhi Leonard obtain extra income. The president of
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  Speaker 1: the Clippers, if you've never heard of, Jillian Zucker, she
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: received a one-year unpaid suspension, so I guess she's going
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: to have to get a job at Whataburger. for misconduct
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: and misleading investigators. Then you had Lawrence Frank, who's very frank.
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  Speaker 1: The general manager is suspended for not one, not two,
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  Speaker 1: not three, not four, not five, six months without pay.
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  Speaker 1: So he'll have to get a job at Wienerschnitzel. Kawhi
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  Speaker 1: Leonard has to pay back $ 700, 000 of improper expenses and
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  Speaker 1: outside income arrangements. And Kawhi's old business manager says, Uncle Dennis,
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  Speaker 1: if I'm reading this right, was banned from the NBA
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  Speaker 1: for not one, not two, not three, not four, five years.
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  Speaker 1: The Clippers facing five years of compliance monitoring, which is
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  Speaker 1: like probation. I believe. I think that's the proper way
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  Speaker 1: to look at that. So it's a good jumping off point.
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  Speaker 1: Let us discuss the question. Is this the full death
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  Speaker 1: penalty for the Clipper franchise? As so many are saying
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  Speaker 1: on social media, it's turn at the lights. The party's over. Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: So I've got Mystery Box, Dos Eques, and Typhoid Mary.
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: And we will combine all of these things together. And
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  Speaker 1: we are going to go bippity boppity is what we're
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  Speaker 1: going to do. So, A, stunningly, after looking at all
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  Speaker 1: the different variables, this is actually not capital punishment. I'm
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: going to take the shock value away. I have an
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  Speaker 1: unpopular opinion here to the Dingleberry's. It looks like the
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  Speaker 1: NBA just dropped a neutron bomb on the Clippers, and
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  Speaker 1: they need to rebuild the L.A. Memorial Sports Arena, the mausoleum,
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  Speaker 1: and go back and play in that dump, which is
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: now a soccer stadium. But, you know what that means,
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: after a full deliberation of the available information, what is
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  Speaker 1: it really? So take a couple steps back. It's a
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  Speaker 1: giant invoice. A lot of money you got to pay out.
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  Speaker 1: Some executives and the owner are going to spend some
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: time in the penalty box. And you lost five future
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: scratcher tickets. They vanish off into thin air. So I
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: wrote down on my scorecard, after looking at the CompuBox stats, whoop. D, damn, do.
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  Speaker 1: That's what I wrote down. I don't care about money.
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  Speaker 1: It's not my money. Steve Ballmer, I would imagine when
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  Speaker 1: he's making his avocado toast for breakfast each morning, he
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  Speaker 1: loses $ 30 million. So it's not that big a deal.
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  Speaker 1: You suspend Ballmer for one year and you talk about, well,
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  Speaker 1: that's really punched me. I've never watched a game because
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  Speaker 1: of the owner. Now, as a talk show host, I
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: love guys like Jerry Jones because they make my life easier.
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  Speaker 1: Do I watch a sporting event to see a rich guy,
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  Speaker 1: a robber baron, sitting in his nice front row seat
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  Speaker 1: or up in the luxury box to watch the game? No,
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  Speaker 1: I don't care about that. Why do I care about that?
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  Speaker 1: I don't know those people. I don't roll in those circles.
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  Speaker 1: And is it really punishment? Because Ballmer, he's going to
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  Speaker 1: just watch the Clipper games from his mega yacht somewhere
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  Speaker 1: out in the Atlantic or the Pacific and spare me
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: the funeral procession over the five first-round picks. If I
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: tell you, all the people that email me, I understand.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: I do the same thing. I love Schadenfreude. It is
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: so much fun. I'm glad you're enjoying it, too. It's great, right?
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: Schadenfreude is wonderful. You dance on the grave of the Clippers.
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: And you seem to think, based on the feedback, from
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  Speaker 1: the people that harass me on the email bag that
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: five first-round draft picks is just the worst of the worst, right?
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: And this is a pet peeve of mine. Draft pick
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  Speaker 1: worship is LT. It's loser think disguised as some kind
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  Speaker 1: of higher-level fandom. It's part of the analytics culture. You
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  Speaker 1: think every draft pick is going to turn out to
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  Speaker 1: be great. The NBA draft is three-card Monty. inexpensive suits
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: it is an annual infomercial the nba puts out every
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: june where most of the merchandise does not work as
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  Speaker 1: advertised does not work as advertised everybody loves the mystery
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: box what's in the box it might contain the next
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: superstar of course it's just some former duke player and
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: usually it contains a guy who will be playing in
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  Speaker 1: turkey three years later, or getting hemorrhoids at the end
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  Speaker 1: of the bench. So my advice to you, listen, it's
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  Speaker 1: not great, but you're in L.A. and you play in
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  Speaker 1: a top-notch arena. They're not taking away your urinals. The
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  Speaker 1: Clippers still lead the NBA. If you want to take
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  Speaker 1: a whiz, there's nowhere you'd rather go to take a
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  Speaker 1: whiz than the Clipper game. All right? And that's very important.
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  Speaker 1: You know, us men, you get older, you got to
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  Speaker 1: take a lot of P's. And so you go to
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  Speaker 1: the Clipper game, and the NBA said you can keep
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  Speaker 1: all your urinals. Every urinal cake stays at the Clipper Arena,
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  Speaker 1: the Clip Joint. It's a wonderful thing. But players want
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: to play in L.A. The Lakers are boring, and they're old,
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  Speaker 1: and they've got their own issues. They're going to court
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: soon with Jeannie Boss. and that whole thing, and then
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  Speaker 1: they had that one-year ownership of Mark Walter. I would
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: say I'd much rather play for Steve Ballmer, who's willing
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  Speaker 1: to pay me under the table, allegedly. I don't have
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  Speaker 1: to say allegedly anymore. I'd much rather play for that guy.
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  Speaker 1: I've been waiting. I've been waiting my entire adult life.
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  Speaker 1: I started on the radio when I was 19. I'm
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  Speaker 1: getting older. I'm waiting for one of my bosses to
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  Speaker 1: want to pay me under the table. For some reason,
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  Speaker 1: they all have great morals when it comes to my contract.
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  Speaker 1: I don't understand why, right? So again, the advice to
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  Speaker 1: the Clippers is go out, find some diamonds in the rough,
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  Speaker 1: Find the hidden gems. Develop players. Like, oh, we can
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  Speaker 1: only find players in the draft. Clippers haven't had many
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  Speaker 1: draft picks anyway for years, and I love it. I
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  Speaker 1: can't stand the draft. I hate it. I hate it.
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  Speaker 2: I hate it.
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  Speaker 1: I hate it. I hate the draft. I'm yelling from
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  Speaker 1: atop the mountain. I hate the draft. I'm happy they
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  Speaker 1: don't have draft picks. Stop clutching your precious, stupid, lame
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  Speaker 1: draft capital like it's some kind of sacred artifact from
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  Speaker 1: back in the old days. Now, page two. Keeping the
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  Speaker 1: theme of the hour going here, Now. it gets good
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: now it gets good the question what happens next for
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  Speaker 1: steve balmer's clippers so if you think as the nba
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: if you think that this thing is just over over Well,
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: just because the punishment came down, if you think that's
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  Speaker 1: the case, you are in for a rude awakening. Or
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: some would say the great awakening, because this is about
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: to go upside down, bizarro world nightmare. Steve Ballmer has
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: F-U money multiplied by F-U money. And now you've given
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: Steve Ballmer, who's got a lot of free time on
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  Speaker 1: his hands, something even more dangerous. A grudge. Hell hath
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: no fury like an aristocrat scorned. And mark my words,
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  Speaker 1: Steve Ballmer is not just going to sit there with
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  Speaker 1: his legs crossed and take this. He can afford to
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: make spite a line item in the Clippers' annual budget.
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: We're talking the old video game in the arcade. Rampage
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: is what we're talking about. You don't humiliate one of
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  Speaker 1: the richest men in America. Last I checked, he was
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: the seventh richest person in America. He's in the same table.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: He's at the same table with Jeff Bezos and Elon
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: Musk and people like that. And so you don't do
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: what the NBA did and then expect him, Ballmer, to
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: send Adam Silver a box of truffles. I don't believe
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: that's going to happen. So Ballmer's probably sitting on his
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: mega yacht drinking a Dos Eques right now, because he
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: became the most interesting man in basketball. I don't always
• 11:51
  Speaker 1: circumvent the salary cap, but when I do, I prefer Kawhi. Ah,
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: see the commercial rights itself. Now, you know the old
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: advice about not tickling a sleeping dragon, right? We've all
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: heard that somewhere along the way in some kind of
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: fairy tale. So the NBA walked into the cave. They
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: went to the back left-hand side of the cave.
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  Speaker 2: Not the right.
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  Speaker 1: Because there was nothing right. They went to the left-hand
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  Speaker 1: side of the cave, okay? So they walked in, and
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: there was a fork in the cave. They could have
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: gone right. There's nothing right. So they went left. They
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: walked over to the left in the cave, okay? You
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: got the picture in your head? So they walked over
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: to the left. They're in the cave, and for some reason,
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: Adam Silver, one of the reptilians, was holding a feather duster.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: in one hand, and then he poked the fire-breathing dragon
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: with the other and then used the feather duster. So
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: that means now Steve Ballmer can now go full Al Davis.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: He's already got an army of lawyers. Sue, sue, sue, sue, sue.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: A boy named Sue. Sue everybody. Release the Kraken. And
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: I'm not talking about the hockey team in Seattle. And
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: turn litigation... into recreational activity he's got ammunition if the
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: league and this was the story that came out a
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: couple weeks ago and obviously came from the clippers based
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: on what we know now but that laid out his
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: defense plan that the league previously had allowed endorsement relationships
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: involving players and companies and they'd already set the precedent
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: and that allowed sponsors to pay players and so that's
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: their argument now whether that's true or not i don't
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  Speaker 1: know And you don't know, and I do know who's
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: going to win the lawyers here, that this becomes Disneyland's
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: haunted mansion. Because if you think Kawhi Leonard was the
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: only player getting money under the table, well, you're in
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: for a rude, rude welcome to Realityville. Because this has
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: been going on for the top 1% to 2% of players. Now,
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: for a while, does that mean it is as deep
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: as Kawhi Leonard? Maybe not. It doesn't mean that it's
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: not against the bylaws of the NBA. And so it's
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: like the Haunted Mansion. Every time you think the ride
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: is over, another skeleton pops out to do a dance
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: right there out of the closet. So forget Lob City.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: That was years ago. The Clippers are now this generation
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: of what the off-court bad boys, bad boys move over
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: Dennis Rodman, Rick Mohorn, and those old school Pistons from
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: back in the day. The Clippers are now an outlaw franchise.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: And the NBA, they wanted them wearing a scarlet letter,
• 14:36
  Speaker 1: and instead it handed them a leather jacket and gave
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: Steve Ballmer the villain origin story that a nerdy older
• 14:46
  Speaker 1: gentleman has been dying to get. So Steve Ballmer, this
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: is still not the craziest thing that's happened to Ballmer.
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: The all-time gold standard remains. Steve Ballmer in 07, almost
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: 20 years ago, getting on stage in front of a
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: bunch of Microsoft employees and saying no one's going to
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: buy the iPhone. Yeah, that did not go so well.
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: All right, last word here. So we must put a
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: bow on what has been a wild day in the NBA.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: So the question, who ends up with a sweetheart deal
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: in this NBA punishment of the Clippers and all the
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: draft picks and the fines and the suspensions, and we'll
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: see if all this stuff holds up. Well, there's only
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: one acceptable answer here, and it's Kawhi Leonard. Kawhi Leonard
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: gets the ultimate all-inclusive package, and it's not even particularly
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: close because if my math is right here, he pays
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: $ 700, 000 in fine, and he pocketed some reports say $ 2
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: million to $ 3 million. Who knows what he actually got?
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: So let's say it's $ 2 million. So he has to
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: pay $ 700, 000. Using malware math, that would mean he ended
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: up benefiting $ 1. 3 million. Or even if it's only $ 1. 3 million,
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: he made $ 600, 000 of extra money. And more importantly, he
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: gets the Altuve package. You know how Rob Manford, the spineless,
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: gutless commissioner of Major League Baseball, refused to punish Altuve? Hey, ump,
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: check him for the buzzer! The cheating a-holes. Well, Kawhi Leonard,
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: no suspension. And much like George Springer of the Cheating A-Holes,
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: Kawhi leaves the country on the transfer portal and is
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: expected to return to Toronto like Caesar coming home from battle.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: And you talk about falling upward. Kawhi is the typhoid
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: Mary of the NBA. He is. I've determined he's the
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: typhoid Mary of the NBA. Every loon looks fine on
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: the outside. Kawhi, when he plays, he plays pretty well, right?
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: So he looks perfectly fine. And la, la, la, la, la, la, zippity-doo-dah, zippity-day.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: And yet everywhere the man goes, he leaves and there's
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: another outbreak of the bubonic plague. I remember in San Antonio,
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: he held a wildcat strike. He didn't want to play
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: for the Spurs, and the fans hated him. Then he
• 17:24
  Speaker 1: went off to Toronto, and he won a championship. Everyone
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: loved him, and I remember videos online of fans burning
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: his jersey when he went off to play for the Clippers.
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: And now we have the Clipper experience. The one common
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: denominator is Kawhi Leonard. And if some of those draft
• 17:40
  Speaker 1: picks are not restored, this becomes the single greatest hustle
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: of our time. Now, I don't really... care much about
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: draft picks however kawaii leonard will have helped either directly
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: or indirectly costing the clippers 10 first round draft picks
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: a couple of pick swaps two-time nvp shade yogus alexander
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: who the late jerry west wanted to keep had an
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: idea to be pretty good and the thunder said well
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: we got to get him if you want paul george
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: and they tried to convince kawaii leonard and uncle dennis
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: that hey we should hold on to this guy's pretty
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: good No, no, I'm not going there unless I get
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: Paul George. Well, Paul George can't play. Well, I'm not
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: going to the Clippers unless I get Paul George. But Kawhi,
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: trust me, he's not that good. He doesn't want to play.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: He's a bad guy. Okay, I want to play with him. Okay, fine.
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: We'll trade SGA. That makes sense. Okay, how'd that work out?
• 18:29
  Speaker 1: Danilo Gallinari, who cares about that? And then all the
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: fines and the suspensions. It's a hot stew. And let's
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: not forget, though. Forget all the picks. I don't really
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: care about those. Seven years of Lazy River Load Management Theater.
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: He averaged Kawhi Leonard just 47 games a season. And
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: is very responsible for me disliking basketball. I used to
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: love the NBA. I went there. I went to, man,
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: over the years, thousands of basketball games in my life.
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: I really only care about it for the playoffs. That's
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: about it. And stories like this. And a lot of
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: that is Kawhi. He just doesn't care about basketball playing,
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: and it's just a bad situation. And he came to
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: the Clippers, and, ah, come on home, and all that.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: Everyone was all excited, and he leaves, and it's like
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: a super fun sight as he exits. And yet somehow
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: he walks away with essentially a parking ticket. That's it.
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: That is some serious skullduggery by Kawhi Leonard. It really is.
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: Be sure to catch live editions of the Ben Maller
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: Show weekdays at 2 a.m. Eastern, 11 p.m. Pacific on
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: Fox Sports Radio and the iHeart Radio app. We'll be
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: right back.
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: Go to YouTube, search Covino and Rich FSR. Check us
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: out on YouTube, subscribe, hit that thumbs up icon, and
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: comment away. So the news out, the Raiders have made
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: a decision, and that is our lead this hour. The
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: Raiders officially naming. the rotting carcass of Kirk Cousins as
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: QB number one. And he will begin the season beating out,
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: beating out the top pick in the 2026 NFL draft,
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: Fernando Mendoza, as he will be sitting that one out.
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: If you saw this or not, perhaps you missed it. Mendoza,
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: all that hype. And I mentioned how embarrassing this was
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: for Mendoza. Mendoza, when he was not getting the first-team
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: reps in training camp and how that was a joke. And,
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: of course, the Raider fan base, some of them not
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: the brightest, got very upset, very upset and very emotional.
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: And I get it. You've been kicked in the ankles
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: quite a bit over the years, and this is another
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: kick in the ankles. All that losing, all that tanking
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: for this guy?
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: Really?
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: Really? So first-year coach, you all tell me this guy's
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: a prodigy, Clint Kubiak. We'll see about that. Well, Kubiak
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: said that Cousins played really good football and had a
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: strong offseason in training camp and earned it. Of course, A,
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: no one watches training camp or offseason workouts, so who
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: cares about that? And playing really good football, under what
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: measurement was he playing really good football? Anyway, it's all
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: a good jumping-off point. Let us discuss... The question, what
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: do you make? What do you make and what do
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: you take away from the Raiders naming Kirk Cousins as
• 21:58
  Speaker 1: their top QB over Fernando Mendoza? So Cousins gets that
• 22:02
  Speaker 1: QB1 title. My observations, I've got Mega Mansion, Glen Ivy
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: Hot Springs, and Mason Jar. And we'll put all of
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: these things together, and we're going to turn on the
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: chainsaw is what we're going to do. Number one. Number one.
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: Number one. Number one. Number one. Let me be very
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: clear for those of you in the back of the room.
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: You ask me, what do you take away from the
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: Raiders naming Kirk Cousins over Fernando Mendoza as the starting quarterback?
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: This is a pure humiliation situation for the Raiders. And
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: there's no other way to look at this. Unless you're
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: wearing your Raider onesie, that's it, and your little Raider
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: sippy cup. You don't spend a year intentionally losing, like
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: the Raiders did last year, tanking a season away to
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: get the top pick in the draft, the number one
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: overall pick, Fernando Mendoza, and then discover, well, wait a minute,
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: assembly required. No. No, there's no assembly required with a
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: top pick in the draft. You're supposed to be, Mendoza's
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: supposed to be a plug and play. Apparently, the plug
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: wasn't included. They bought it on Timu. They should have
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: bought it on Amazon. Bad job by them. The Raiders
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: just wasted a season of football to draft a developmental quarterback.
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: And many of you seem perfectly fine with that, which
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: tells me you're not that bright. I get it. I understand.
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: You do not draft a project at number one. You
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: don't do it. This is like buying the most expensive
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: mega mansion. So you can brag to all your friends.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: I'm telling you, the nicest mega mansion, the most bathrooms,
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: the most bedrooms. It's got the biggest pool on the block.
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: It's the greatest mega mansion. Everyone's impressed. They look at
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: it like, oh, my God. And then you go in
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: there and you realize, well, wait a minute. I need
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: to call Roto-Rooter. Well, why do you need to call Roto-Rooter?
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: Because the plumbing isn't hooked up. Well, why is the
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: plumbing not hooked up? I don't know, but it looks
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: nice on the outside. Remember Indiana's little run there to
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: the title? You guys, even Jamarcus Russell started week one
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: for the old Oakland Raiders. Do you understand that? This
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: is how embarrassing. He's not even as good as Jamarcus Russell.
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: Kirk Cousins won the job. That tells you... infinitely more
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: about Fernando Mendoza than it does about Kirk Cousins the
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: Raiders saying we're developing Mendoza is NFL code it's a
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: dog whistle for we really f this up and this
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: guy isn't anywhere close to being ready and might never
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: be ready if 38 year old Captain Kirk who and
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: I yes I like the guy's career and all that
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: you know it's been good for business sucking in every
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: primetime game the good thing about playing for the Raiders
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: you don't have to worry about primetime games very often
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: Captain Kirk, at this point, after three stink bomb seasons,
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: the Vikings didn't want him back. Falcons kicked him out
• 25:09
  Speaker 1: of town. In fact, the moment he got to Atlanta,
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: they drafted a quarterback because they knew he couldn't play.
• 25:14
  Speaker 1: And the better option in September is Kirk Cousins. And, okay,
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: so Mendoza was overdrafted in April. That's what that means.
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: That's it. All right, page two. We now move to
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: the fast lane. College football. A new excerpt that several
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: of you sent below the Mason-Dixon line my way. I
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: think the book's called Lane Being Lane. So the excerpts
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: of the book made their way around the interweb, and
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: it details Lane Kiffin, his years at Alabama when he
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: was the Crimson Tide offensive coordinator for Nick Saban from
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: 2014 to 2016. Now, a lot of this stuff popped
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: up back in those days, but time's Time flies by,
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: and it's hard to believe it's been this long, and
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: yet it has. So Lane Kiffin's wife and kids remained
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: in California. So his wife and kids were back in California.
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: And let's just say Lane Kiffin decided he wanted to
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: enjoy his life a little bit there in Tuscaloosa, and
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: he enjoyed all the good bars in Tuscaloosa as the
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: marriage continued. Went up, up, and away. Yeah, went sideways there.
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: So in the book, Nick Saban reportedly instructed one of
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: the Alabama staffers to, quote, just keep him away, Lane Kiffin,
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: away from the sorority girls. Former Alabama staffer and the
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: great name Josh Booty, Mr. Booty, recalled that Lane Kiffin
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: asked bar employees to introduce him to the hotties. I
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: think most men, they go into a bar where the
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: hottie's at. Now, one friend feared that Lane Kiffin was
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: such an alcoholic that he would drink himself to death
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: and recalled him crying over effing up his life. Now,
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: these excerpts of this book also revisit one of the
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: great Internet stories, those of you that are too young
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: or didn't pay attention to the Internet back then, the
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: legendary Joey Freshwater. One of my favorite characters in college
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: football history, if you've never heard of Joey Freshwater, that
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: is the alias that Lane Kiffin supposedly used. He denied it.
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: I tend to think that there was a Joey Freshwater alias.
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: Not quite as good as Ron Mexico, my favorite Atlanta
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: Falcon quarterback, the great Ron Mexico.
• 27:45
  Speaker 4: Anyway.
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: All right, question. How suspicious is the timing of of
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: these Lane Kiffin stories right before college football and the
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: first real opportunity for Lane Kiffin to show the world
• 28:00
  Speaker 1: what he's like at LSU. And then eventually LSU plays
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: Ole Miss here shortly. So how suspicious is the timing
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: on this? So I looked at the Maller scorecard, and
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: this is what's called a CM situation, calculated madness. And
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: I do believe, based on circumstantial evidence... that this is
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: a payback situation from Ole Miss with a dish best served,
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: piping hot in Vanity Fair, because this story's out of
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: Vanity Fair. They ran a bunch of the excerpts of
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: this upcoming Lane Kiffin book. And so it looks to me,
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: based on what I'm seeing here, like they're reheating decade-old
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: Joey Freshwater leftovers in a casserole, in the microwave, and
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: they're serving them up with an ice-cold smear beer, a
• 28:52
  Speaker 1: frosty mug of character assassination for Lane Kiffin. And, yeah,
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: these stories stem from Lane, the boozing era, on a
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: booze cruise for Lane during his Alabama days, as we've
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: talked about. But you do wonder how much Ole Miss
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: helped roll down the manure wagon pushing it downhill there.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: Is it true that jilted boosters of Ole Miss helped
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: grease the skids to ensure that the mud arrived just
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: as LSU begins the $ 90- plus million Lane Kiffin experience? Inquiring
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: minds would like to know. So forget the mineral baths.
• 29:40
  Speaker 1: at Glen Ivy Hot Springs. Lane went directly to Club Mud.
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: He went over to Club Mud. Kiffin claiming that he's
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: been sober since 2021. And right on cue, despite that claim,
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: right on cue, his poltergeist, Greatest hits album from his
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: poltergeist here is back on the jukebox. So there you go.
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: That's SEC, not revenge porn. It's revenge theater at its finest. Now,
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: speaking of that, the gift that keeps on giving, staying
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: in college football, and this does involve Lane Kiffin and
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: his need for professional football players on LSU. So the
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: Georgia Athletic Director, or actually not Athletic Director, Attorney General.
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: That's a little higher than Athletic Director. The Attorney General
• 30:29
  Speaker 1: of Georgia, somebody named Chris Carr, I am told. I
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: don't live in Georgia, and I don't know all my
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: Attorney Generals. But this guy Chris Carr is urging the
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: Southeastern Conference Commissioner, the SEC Commissioner Greg Sankey, to use, quote,
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: all measures available, all measures available, including suspending or removing
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: LSU from the conference. If the Tigers do use former
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: NFL players, the attorney general in the state of Georgia
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: is calling for the Southeastern Conference to excommunicate Louisiana State. Now,
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: Carr threatened all legal means necessary, declaring, this is my
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: favorite part, college athletes are for college athletes only. I'm
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: sure he started laughing after that. Now, the dispute centers
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: on the former Ole Miss players, Lane Kiffin's old guys,
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: Daquan Wright and Zavian Harris, who joined the NFL for
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: training camp and then said, well, I kind of want
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: to go back. I'll go play for Lane. Now, a
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: Louisiana judge did rule that the Southeastern Conference cannot punish
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: schools for using these players who return after signing NFL contracts.
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: Of course, This will be appealed and go to a
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: higher court, and it'll go to likely a federal court. Now,
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: the SEC penalties that they claim they're going to issue
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: if you play one of these NFL guys is a
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: half-season coaching suspension, fines worth 50% of the sport's annual budget,
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: and a loss of conference voting rights, and also a
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: partridge in a pear tree. So the question, which is
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: more ridiculous– LSU campaigning to use former NFL players and
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: apparently going to court with Lane Kiffin being the ringleader,
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: or the Attorney General of Georgia trying to get LSU
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: kicked out, threatening to kick LSU out of the Southeastern Conference.
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: So this is all-encompassing Southern fried football at its absolute greatest.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: It's just different. Deep fried in Looney Tunes batter. And
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: here comes another political goober parachuting in from thousands of
• 32:51
  Speaker 1: feet in the sky, screaming about protecting the integrity of
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: college sports. And so is LSU and Coach Lane Kiffin
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: really the great menace of Western civilization? At least they
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: didn't use student athlete. They instead said college athletics are
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: for college athletes only. Of course, they're getting paid. It's
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: semi-professional football. Now, what about Texas? There's a lineman, Cole Hudson,
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: who returned for a fifth year after wearing NFL laundry.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: He was at rookie minicamp with the Browns and the Cowboys.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: And so I don't remember there being an emergency siren
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: for that. I don't see that. The whole mason jar
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: of moonshine, the whole mason jar of moonshine is actually
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: about the courts. It's not about the players. It's not
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: about Lane Kiffin. It's about the courts. If LSU gets
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: a judge to rule and confirm the original ruling that
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: these players are eligible, the Southeastern Conference can go pound
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: sand with a rubber mallet. All right? They can go
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: try to trudge the ocean. It doesn't matter. Conference rule books,
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: last I checked, and I'm never wrong about these things,
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: do not supersede court orders. Understand? Okay. So... Spare me
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: the sanctimonious sermons. I don't like what LSU's doing and
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: Lane Kiffin at all. I think it's rather silly. That said,
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: if it is allowed by the court system, there's not
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: much the SEC can do. And Georgia had a former
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: player involved in a, well, they had a bunch of
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: guys that were speed racing in the most famous, the
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: fatal streetcar accident. I don't remember as many political grandstanding
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: moments from people in Georgia over the sacred honor of
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: playing on saturday so it's of course integrity based on
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: the situation in this case it's just some political guy
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: peacocking around and trying to get some attention and obviously
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: it worked because here we are talking about it on
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: the radio so Guilty as charged, clearly. Absolutely.
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: Be sure to catch live editions of the Ben Maller
• 35:03
  Speaker 2: Show weekdays at 2 a.m. Eastern, 11 p.m.
• 35:05
  Speaker 3: Pacific.
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: Here we go, here we go, here we go. 2018,
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: 2018 Browns. Tyrod Taylor started it instead of him. Go
• 35:12
  Speaker 1: ahead there, Kupala, please.
• 35:14
  Speaker 4: Joey Porter Jr. was asked on Tuesday if he'll play
• 35:16
  Speaker 4: week one without a new deal. He said, I don't know.
• 35:18
  Speaker 4: I would have to talk to the guys upstairs and
• 35:20
  Speaker 4: my agents about that one. Ben, do you think they'll
• 35:22
  Speaker 4: get a deal done or will we see a Le'Veon
• 35:24
  Speaker 4: Bell type situation?
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: Well, I don't think they're going to get a deal done.
• 35:28
  Speaker 1: And it's the Steelers. And by the way, come on now.
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: He's signed a, I think he's making, what is he making,
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: $ 4 million or something like that for the Steelers. If
• 35:39
  Speaker 1: you don't show up. You should tarnish the man's reputation.
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: You're getting paid over. You already have a contract. You're
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: worried about your next contract. Next!
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: With every momentous occasion comes some Debbie Downers. With Stan
• 35:51
  Speaker 4: Kroenke buying the Angels, Buster Only reports that this makes
• 35:54
  Speaker 4: Mike Trout trade more likely. We also have people speculating
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: that Kroenke moves the team out of California. Ben, do
• 36:00
  Speaker 4: you think either of those two things could happen?
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: No, the Angels aren't moving out of California. That's ridiculous.
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: That's not going to happen. They have a loyal, even
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: when they suck, they're still getting two, three million fans
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: a year. They're not moving. And Trout is moving, though. Next!
• 36:14
  Speaker 4: A new report says the Mavericks want to play Kyrie
• 36:17
  Speaker 4: Irving through January to build his value and then trade
• 36:18
  Speaker 4: him at the deadline. Ben, do you see any scenario
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: in which Kyrie Irving is still with Dallas at the
• 36:22
  Speaker 4: end of the season?
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: Well, that's funny. They want to play him and then
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: trade him. He doesn't play. All right. He's always hurt.
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: What are we doing with Kyrie? How'd we do Koopaloo?
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: There it is. You failed. Trout's going nowhere.
• 36:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah, he is.
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: He's going to the Phillies. It's now time for... Time for... Hurry, hurry.
• 36:52
  Speaker 3: I can hardly wait.
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: Ask Ben. Twitter. Send us your questions on Twitter now.
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: And away we go. It's Ask Ben. Your questions are
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: answers for the rest of the hour. These are actual
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: questions by actual people. For the reading of the questions
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: sent in via the hashtag AskBenOnX, we bring in the Coop-a-loo.
• 37:14
  Speaker 4: It's weird. The first couple questions I see here kind
• 37:16
  Speaker 4: of have a theme. We're going to start off with...
• 37:18
  Speaker 4: Question from Inca Terror.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: Hi, Inca Terror.
• 37:22
  Speaker 4: Inca Terror wants to know what is the hardest U.S.
• 37:24
  Speaker 4: state to spell correctly?
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: So not not city state because the hardest were a
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: lot of people would be like Albuquerque, which is but
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: that you're asking for a state. Yeah. So I let's
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: see here. What would be the hardest state? For Lorena,
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: I'm going to go any of them. How about that?
• 37:42
  Speaker 1: I'm a very good speller.
• 37:46
  Speaker 3: Are you?
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: You are? Yes.
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: Really?
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: I don't believe you. I would say off the top
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: of my head here, let's see. Let me test Lorena.
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: How about this? Let's see if she can spell Connecticut.
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: How about that? I think that's the hardest one.
• 37:58
  Speaker 3: Okay, so C-O-N-N-E-C-U-T. Ah, she got it right.
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: How dare you.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: All right, what do you think's the hardest thing?
• 38:11
  Speaker 4: There you go.
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: In your face, I know.
• 38:13
  Speaker 3: I don't think any of them are hard. My favorite
• 38:15
  Speaker 3: one to spell, though, is Mississippi, because you can put
• 38:17
  Speaker 3: it into a song.
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: That's right.
• 38:19
  Speaker 4: Can you sing the song?
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-B-B-I.
• 38:22
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 38:22
  Speaker 3: I think I can also spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: Can you? That's one of my favorite words to say.
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: I don't say it enough. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. Coop?
• 38:32
  Speaker 3: I mean, even though she got it right, I do
• 38:34
  Speaker 3: think Connecticut is the.
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: The hardest one to spell. That sneaky eye, right?
• 38:41
  Speaker 3: It's just weird.
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: It doesn't sound like it looks. There's a lot of
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: words in English that don't sound like they look. All right.
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: What is next here? What do we got? All right.
• 38:53
  Speaker 4: JT the Wingman wants to know, what is your favorite
• 38:56
  Speaker 4: letter in the alphabet?
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: Well, I'm a little biased here. I like the letter B.
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: It's a B for Ben. I enjoy the letter B.
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: It's my favorite. It's my first initial, and I like that.
• 39:07
  Speaker 1: What about you, Lorena? Yeah, I'm a big fan of
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: the L. You know? Similar.
• 39:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: All right. Very simple, then. Coop, I'm going to guess.
• 39:17
  Speaker 4: No, I mean, I don't know if I'm the only
• 39:19
  Speaker 4: one that's not, like, a total narcissist here.
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 39:23
  Speaker 3: What a schmuck. My favorite letter is S. I don't know. why. S?
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh, for schmuck. There you go.
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: All right.
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: What's next? What do we got? It's Ask Ben. Your questions,
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: our answers.
• 39:39
  Speaker 4: Mike the Leprechaun wants to know, what's the worst habit
• 39:41
  Speaker 4: that you tried to give up but failed?
• 39:45
  Speaker 3: It says his is suntan lotion.
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: No, crack is my... No, I don't know. A habit
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: I tried... No, I mean, obviously the one I kind
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: of succeeded on is eating too much, but no, I mean,
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: I don't gamble too much. I'm kind of boring. I
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: don't think there's anything I can think of. What about you, Lorena?
• 40:06
  Speaker 3: I've done pretty good.
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: I used to bite my nails. I stopped doing that.
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: I used to pick my nose.
• 40:10
  Speaker 3: I stopped doing that.
• 40:11
  Speaker 1: That would be the one. I don't pick my nose.
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: You've seen my boogers, too.
• 40:15
  Speaker 3: I stopped doing that.
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: Wow.
• 40:17
  Speaker 1: What?
• 40:18
  Speaker 4: The problem is I don't try to stop any of
• 40:20
  Speaker 4: my bad habits.
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: Oh, yes. You lean into them. You like them. You
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: embrace them. That's the way to do it.
• 40:25
  Speaker 3: Sure.
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: Why not?
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: We need more bad habits.
• 40:27
  Speaker 3: Andy and Lionel Lakes, do you enjoy a good deep
• 40:30
  Speaker 3: tissue massage?
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: No. No, I don't. What about you?
• 40:34
  Speaker 4: Never had one.
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 40:35
  Speaker 2: Cool.
• 40:36
  Speaker 3: No, they hurt. Just a regular massage for me.
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 40:38
  Speaker 3: All right.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: All right. Bob Kraft likes those, too.