Latest / Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald / 2023: My Surgeon General with Vice Admiral Vivek H. Murthy, MD, MBA

Transcript

2023: My Surgeon General with Vice Admiral Vivek H. Murthy, MD, MBA · Fake Doctors, Real Friends with Zach and Donald

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: That is the sound of my favorite lead only fans.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: Anyway, are you gonna watch? Are you gonna go watch
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: the Marvel's film? Uh?
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: Donald Faison, Well, you know we did hang out with
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Bree Larson at that tailors.
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: It has nothing to do with whether you're gonna go
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: see the movie or not.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: It looks dope. I'm not gonna lie.
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: Joel, Are you gonna go see Marvel's Mark Marvel.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: The Marvel, the Marvel, Marvel, the Marvels. I'm gonna be
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: honest with you. I wasn't a huge fan of Captain Marvel. Okay,
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: first one.
• 0:34
  Speaker 2: There comes your honesty, Joel. What were your thoughts on
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: Captain Marvel?
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: Liked it, but not a perfect movie at all. It
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: did make a billion dollars in the box officoes. So
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: I think it's when people are like, but this is
• 0:44
  Speaker 3: what killed the Mark, like the Marvel's Andradic Universe, like
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: it made a billion dollars.
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but that was back when Marvel was making a
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: billion dollars every movie though, you got it, that is
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: exactly every movie, no matter what happened, they were dropping
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: a billion.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: I saw an item Joel and Annel and Donald that said,
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: and this could be totabull shit. I need you guys.
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: It said that the new Marvel universe is thinking about
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: bringing back their big stars. I heard, including all those
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: people they killed off. They're thinking about bringing them all back.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: They could possibly do well, you know what, that's what
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: comic books do, though, That's how comic books are. You know,
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: they killed off characters and then they bring them back,
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: and you know, it doesn't surprise me that that's what
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: they're talking about. Star Wars bro.
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: Imagine, imagine Robert Donna and yours check to just show
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: up so much.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: I want that.
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: He doesn't need money.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: I want that. I want that.
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: How about he doesn't need money. He's gonna be like
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: I amount of ideas, He's like, amount of ideas? How
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: about how about like an island?
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: No, that's he's probably owned one.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: He probably owns one, or he probably got two.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: Right, he's like out of ideas? How about is.
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: There is no how about a planet? It's not even
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: a plane anymore? Just kee, He's like, I'm out of ideas.
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: You guys, you've given me so much money. How about right,
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: do you think they can do a cameo?
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: Do you think they would collect residuals on that ship.
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: I'm in New York City, everybody, but the weather's gotten cold,
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: so there's no ice out here that takes the winner off.
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: He probably does something else.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: Probably sound hot dogs.
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: As long as he doesn't play a song when he
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: does it. I'm fine. Donald. I know how much you
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: love Ganja, and I have to say, you can walk
• 2:40
  Speaker 2: around Lower Manhattan and you might get you might get
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: two breaths without the smelling whed, but you're not gonna
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: get a third.
• 2:51
  Speaker 3: The weak carts are wild out there, yo, everywhere I
• 2:55
  Speaker 3: grew up in everywhere.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: I grew up in that city, and we smoked weed
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: back in the day like a shit.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: But you at least were a little bit covert.
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because you go to jail for a really long
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: time for weed. Now that it's decriminalized in New York City,
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: I'm not screminized.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: It's legal, recreational legal. There's a weed shop. Every third
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: store is a weed shop. It's like, I know, it's
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: probably an overcorrection, but it is really and I don't
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: mean to sound like a grumpy old man, but it
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: is really unbelievable how many people are so high on
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: a given moment on the island of Manhattan.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: Well if you if if people walk the streets of
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: LA it would be the same thing. I promise you.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because there's no pedestrians there, right, I promise a
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: song about that. Nobody walks in LA.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: And they also wrote a song about how it doesn't
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: rain in southern California. But I hear El Nino's coming.
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: El Nino's coming to LA.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, man, you might want to keep your ass in
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: New York City, bro, that shit is on its way
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: all winter long.
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: El Nino, you look very cute in your little hoodie.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: Motherfucker. You look like you've been working out your shoulders.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: Show me that, show me that ship, show me that
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: gone motherfucking Okay, that's motherfucker with a six pack.
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: I'm having a glow.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: Up, glow up. That's what happens when you single.
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: I'm just getting in shape, I mean, and learning strike
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: there's something I can do. I feel like my job
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: is exercising.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: You know. I've been animating a lot, a lot, a lot.
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: I'm taking classes with Justin uh Rash. He's the dude
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: that did the stop motion for you know that scene
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: in Pinocchio with the monkey doing the swing, the thing
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: that was all over the place when that movie was
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: coming out. Yeah, he's teaching me right now along with
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: my buddy Jacob. Yo. I'm learning some ship. Man. I'm
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: also learning like even in stop motion animation, no is
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: so fucked. I mean you think as an actor, you
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: hear no a lot stop motion animation if you don't
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: get the shot right, No, but you just put in
• 5:02
  Speaker 1: five hours of work. I had to equate that too. Well.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: You know, I put about three hours of work in
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: when I have auditions to go on an audition to
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: hear no. So it's kind of the same thing. But
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: this shit is fun, man, I'm doing I'm living the
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: dream right now.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: You love it, And you can't have a question for
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: I've never asked you. You can't go back right if
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: you fucked up one sequence of four frames and then
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: you did the whole sequence, can you go back and
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: be like, you can put it, put the puppet in
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: that exact position and try and fix it your or
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: it doesn't look good.
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: You can, And if you're really skilled at mapping out
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: what your puppet's doing, it's really easy to do. But
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: for the most part, you set a plan and you
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: build a road map, but then halfway through your improvising.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: You know what I mean That motion is mostly improvising
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: with some sort of with some sort of guideline. So
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: you develop a plan and you and you and you
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: try to attack the plan head on, but sincerely halfway
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: through you're like, I'm weighing it right now?
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: Right? Is that how all the pros do it? It's
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: kind of like it's improvisational. I mean, they know that
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: the puppet has to climb up to the tree and
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: the monkey has to swing and grab a flower, right,
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: but there's no rules to that. He's just kind of
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: free flow.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: There are a lot of rules to it, depending on.
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: Well I'm saying to execute it, but I'm saying like
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: it's up to the individual artists to interpret how he's
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: going to do that right?
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: Right, But then the director could be like, wow, that's
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: really cool. That's not what I want. Can you do
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: it this way?
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: Right? That's not the style of the thing.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: Right. It's a very it's a very very, very very
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: long process. But I mean, I mean, if you love it,
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: you love it. Man, Like my ankles were swollen and
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: shit from standing in the same standing.
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: You should get one of those mats that they have
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: for people. Yeah, yeah, those kitchen mats when someone has
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: to do dishes all the time. I know, I know,
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: all right, we have a very, we have a very.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: I can't believe that we have this, guest. We did
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: it big, dude, We've got we must have gotten big
• 7:03
  Speaker 2: because the Surgeon General of the United States did all the.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: Way up to the US government. You know, Bam in
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: your face.
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: This guy's friends with Obama.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: All I'm trying to say is is that he's talked
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: to a lot of president.
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: Do you remember the surgeon Well I want to talk
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: to him about this, But do you remember the surgeon only?
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: What's the only thing you can remember about surgeon generals?
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: Sierra Coop. That's the only one I remember.
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: No, it is it was see Ever Coop.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: Right, it's not. It's not Sierra. I thought it was Era.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: See every Coop. By the way, we're the same age.
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: And that's what all I could remember too. And he
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: was the guy who put this I think the cigarette. Yeah,
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: the CI cigarette Surgeon General says.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this will make you this ship will make.
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: You give you cancer. Yeah right, see Ever Coop. I
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: couldn't believe I pulled that out of my butt. I
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: know what he looks like too.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: I don't know what he looks like. I just remember
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: the name was like Sierra Coop and I was like,
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: that's a PRETI but it's see Everett Coop. You thought
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: his name was Sierra yees, Sierra Coop.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: Well, ladies and gentlemen, our podcast has gotten fancy enough,
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: fake doctors, real friends that we have the Surgeon General
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: of the United States of America right now.
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: He is, ha, we got that motherfucker on hold.
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, make him wait.
• 8:24
  Speaker 4: Eight stories.
• 8:26
  Speaker 5: You're not sure we made about a bunch of dogs
• 8:30
  Speaker 5: and nurses j He.
• 8:33
  Speaker 4: Said, he's the stories Net. So yander round here, yeada
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: round here.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: There. Oh my goodness, wow, each oh my good Look
• 8:53
  Speaker 2: at you.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: You got like the whole background you're standing in front
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: of it. It looks like you're in the briefing room.
• 9:01
  Speaker 6: This is where I do a lot of my podcasts from.
• 9:03
  Speaker 6: It's uh, it's good.
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: Well, you're really in your house. You're really in your house,
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: and you just got a blue screen thing up though.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: Keep it one.
• 9:10
  Speaker 6: Well, I'm really in a movie theater and the show's
• 9:12
  Speaker 6: about to start. But I figure I'll do that, keep.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: It to keep it down.
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: Well, welcome to our show. We're so honored you're here.
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: Make sure I'm pronouncing your name right. It's Vivek Murphy.
• 9:26
  Speaker 6: Yeah, thank you, that's perfect.
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: And you are the Surgeon General of the United States
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: of America.
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: Thunder supply, Daniel, Thunder.
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: We're gonna have some thunder a supply right now. Daniel,
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: thank you so much for coming. You're probably the fanciest
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: guest we've ever had.
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: And we've had We've had Brendan Fraser.
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: But I think you're cooler. I'm sorry, Bent, I'm gonna
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: keep it one hundred. You're cooler, man.
• 9:49
  Speaker 6: Well, you know, he's a pretty big deal. So I
• 9:53
  Speaker 6: don't really think about myself as fancy, and my kids
• 9:55
  Speaker 6: remind me of that often, So.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: You know, No, you're fancy, dude, You're very fan You're
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: very very fascy.
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: Where one degree where one degree separation away from the president,
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: that's all we keep thinking. Donald and I were just
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: ruminating it. We were growing up. There was see Everett
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: Coop and he Donald just admitted that he thought his
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: name was Sierra Coop.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: I thought it was Sierra, but I couldn't.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: Believe that I pulled I pulled that name out of
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: my head see Everett Coop, and I googled him because
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: I was interested in I learned this Donald and tell
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: you that. I believe he was the first surgeon to
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: separate conjoined twins. Did you know that the.
• 10:30
  Speaker 6: VEC did not know that about him? Actually, that's really interesting.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: Where were they conjoined? That where they can joined at
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: the hip because they don't know, but at the shoulder
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: because once it's a heart and head and brainer and.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: Joel can look it up for us. I'm sure it was.
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: It was the first time it was done. I believe Joelle.
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: Please check that out for me.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: Have you done something like that? What's your I have not.
• 10:51
  Speaker 6: I have not separated anyone later in life at any point.
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: What do you do? Were you a surgeon before you
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: got this position?
• 11:02
  Speaker 6: So I wasn't. I was in internal medicine. The doctor
• 11:04
  Speaker 6: with that meant that I took care of adult patients,
• 11:07
  Speaker 6: and I specialized in hospital based medicine, so I took
• 11:10
  Speaker 6: care of patients once they were admitted to the hospital,
• 11:12
  Speaker 6: So that meant they were usually sicker. There's usually more
• 11:15
  Speaker 6: more complicated sort of situation going on. But that's where
• 11:18
  Speaker 6: I practiced for many years before joining the government.
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: And was were you surgeon general with Obama as well?
• 11:26
  Speaker 6: I was, so I was. I served as surgeon general
• 11:29
  Speaker 6: during his second term, the President Obama second term, and
• 11:32
  Speaker 6: then President Biden asked me to come back to serve
• 11:36
  Speaker 6: in the role when he took office, which was in
• 11:38
  Speaker 6: the throes of COVID, and there's a lot happening when
• 11:40
  Speaker 6: it came to public health in the country, so that's
• 11:42
  Speaker 6: why I came back.
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: So you didn't serve with Trump at all?
• 11:47
  Speaker 6: Well, so, well, technically speaking, I did serve for the
• 11:51
  Speaker 6: first three and a half months of the Trump administration
• 11:55
  Speaker 6: because the surgeon general's term actually doesn't go follow the
• 12:01
  Speaker 6: political calendar, so it doesn't tie in within a president's
• 12:05
  Speaker 6: sort of time and time in office. It's independent of that.
• 12:08
  Speaker 6: So my term actually extended past when President Obama in
• 12:13
  Speaker 6: left office. And that's why you know I served for
• 12:15
  Speaker 6: a few months into the Trump administration. I wasn't there
• 12:18
  Speaker 6: for the vast majority of his tenure as president, and
• 12:22
  Speaker 6: during COVID when COVID hit, I was a private citizen
• 12:25
  Speaker 6: on the outside, which I'll tell you was it was
• 12:27
  Speaker 6: tough in some ways. Because you know, having sometimes in
• 12:29
  Speaker 6: your inner role and then you step out of it
• 12:32
  Speaker 6: and then a problem comes up that you could have addressed.
• 12:33
  Speaker 6: When you're in your role, you're like, oh, gosh, I
• 12:35
  Speaker 6: wish I could have been back, you know, in that role.
• 12:37
  Speaker 6: Maybe I could have helped a bit. So I found
• 12:39
  Speaker 6: myself thinking about that in the first year. But you know,
• 12:42
  Speaker 6: but thanks to the President, Buyden had an opportunity to
• 12:44
  Speaker 6: come back and hopefully do some good.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: That's really interesting because in the movies like it, they
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: make it seem like once you're in office, you kind
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: of got a way back in, not like back into office,
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: but you could call the Attorney General like a bro. Look,
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: so listen, I'm freaking out, but I'm sure idea. Let
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: me come in on the phone. We all come in
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: and we talked this.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: I don't think Evertt's with us anymore. I'm not sure, but.
• 13:12
  Speaker 6: Joelle passed away. I don't know about the whereabouts of
• 13:16
  Speaker 6: Sierra Coop, though.
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: Sarah Coop is thriving. So wait, will you just tell
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: our audience because I'm sure people are wondering about what
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: it is that you do. Oh wait, Joel is telling me.
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: I want to answer the trivia here the first recorded
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: successful separation of conjoined twins was carried out, Oh by
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: Swiss surgeon, so Joelle, I don't have that right.
• 13:42
  Speaker 3: So he was the first one to do Siamese twins
• 13:45
  Speaker 3: joined at the heart specifically.
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: Oh, well, that's very impressive. Trying to why are you
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: trying to minimize what I said?
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: Trying to me sure I got the right information? Is
• 13:55
  Speaker 3: sixty day six first conjoined twins?
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: He didn't first conjoins by the heart?
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: Vivague.
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: Will you tell our listeners who might only know of
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: the term surgeon general from the cigarette pack warning, what
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: it is that you do, because I've googled it a bit,
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: But explain it to people absolutely.
• 14:13
  Speaker 6: And that is actually how a lot of people first
• 14:15
  Speaker 6: hear about the role is they hear about warning labels
• 14:18
  Speaker 6: that are on cigarette boxes or on alcohol sort of
• 14:22
  Speaker 6: bottles or cans. But the role really has two primary responsibilities.
• 14:27
  Speaker 6: The one is to the first is to the content
• 14:30
  Speaker 6: connect with the public and communicate with the public about
• 14:33
  Speaker 6: critical public health issues. That could be like HIV and tobacco.
• 14:38
  Speaker 6: When saver coop with Surge in general, it could be
• 14:40
  Speaker 6: about other issues like COVID nineteen and mental health, mental
• 14:44
  Speaker 6: health being the one that I've focused on a lot
• 14:45
  Speaker 6: during my time. The second role, though, of the Surgeon
• 14:48
  Speaker 6: General is much less known, and that is actually to
• 14:51
  Speaker 6: oversee one of the eight uniformed services in the US government.
• 14:56
  Speaker 6: So many you may be familiar with the Army, the Navy,
• 14:58
  Speaker 6: the Air Force are some of our uniformed services, but
• 15:02
  Speaker 6: one of them is also the United States Public Health
• 15:04
  Speaker 6: Service Commission Corps. These are six thousand uniformed officers who
• 15:08
  Speaker 6: are nurses, doctors, physical therapists, pharmacists, and public health experts,
• 15:13
  Speaker 6: public health engineers, and they actually serve in public health
• 15:17
  Speaker 6: roles all across the country, and we deployed them during
• 15:20
  Speaker 6: times of emergencygment as an earthquake or a tornado, during
• 15:23
  Speaker 6: COVID nineteen after nine to eleven, these are all times
• 15:26
  Speaker 6: we deployed many of our officers to help provide direct
• 15:29
  Speaker 6: care and shore up the public health system. So the
• 15:32
  Speaker 6: Surgeon General has the privilege of overseeing that uniformed service.
• 15:36
  Speaker 6: So that's actually the reason why I wear this uniform.
• 15:38
  Speaker 6: It's not because of my role as a public health communicator.
• 15:42
  Speaker 6: It's because I oversee the US Public Health Service.
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: You are literally a surgeon general.
• 15:50
  Speaker 6: Well, it's very interesting. So this is a funny thing
• 15:53
  Speaker 6: about that term. It's surgeon general. I'm actually not a surgeon.
• 15:56
  Speaker 6: I'm an internal medicine doc. And I'm actually not a general.
• 15:59
  Speaker 6: I'm an admiral because that's the way that our ranks
• 16:02
  Speaker 6: work in the public Health Service.
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: I'm so confused right now.
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: So you should be called an internal admiral. Right, let's
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: call Biden. Let's call Biden. I want to straighten this U.
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: I don't, I don't. I know, he's got a couple
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: of things on his plate right now. But if you
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: could just text him, I want to change the name
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: of you to internal admiral.
• 16:23
  Speaker 6: Well, that's why I said at the beginning, just call
• 16:25
  Speaker 6: me Vivake. It's a lot easier.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: I was about to see the outfit. The uniform is
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: very nice looking. He looked very sharp. And I've noticed
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: this before I've even ever met you today. I always
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: thought that you looked very sharp in that in that coat.
• 16:37
  Speaker 6: Oh, that's very nice of you to say. I appreciate that.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: Son.
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, sorry, Donald didn't dress up. He's in his Uh.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: I didn't get the memo that Viveke was gonna come
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: in on his show with a freaking blazer.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: But you've seen images of the VAC before the SERI
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: he's always dressed really nicely in that uniform.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: I had no clue he was coming on with the uniform.
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: I had no clue.
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: Wait, I first have a question about cigarettes. You know
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: when you go to other countries. I just made a
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: movie recently in Montreal, and oh my goodness, their cigarette
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: warning packets are so intense, And I wonder why you
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: haven't up the game because you just yours, just say like,
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: I don't know what's warning.
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: Maybe you could get you could get cancer.
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: I'm sure you've seen how other countries they have an
• 17:26
  Speaker 2: image of like a crying child next to their parents' bed,
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: like they tell a whole story on these cigarettes.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: You smoke this, you could talk like this.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: Now, yes, they don't walk around. And I'm wondering if
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: there's been any discussion of bringing our level of warnings
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: on cigarette packages up to the European Canadian level.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: Like we were in a moment we last thing, weren't
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: we at a moment where cigarettes had dropped off and
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: vaping had happened, And then now vaping is just as dangerous,
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: Like let's get into the whole thing on smoke.
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: Well, first answer my question, then answered Donald's.
• 18:01
  Speaker 6: These are awesome questions, by the way. So first is
• 18:04
  Speaker 6: that you're totally right. Many other countries have graphic warning labels,
• 18:08
  Speaker 6: not just text. They've got pictures that really bring home
• 18:11
  Speaker 6: why cigarettes are bad for you and frankly bad for
• 18:14
  Speaker 6: the people around you. We I would love for us
• 18:17
  Speaker 6: to do that in the United States, but there are
• 18:18
  Speaker 6: some legal challenges with us actually doing that. And I'll
• 18:22
  Speaker 6: tell you one thing without getting into all the gory
• 18:25
  Speaker 6: details of this, is that the tobacco industry has a
• 18:29
  Speaker 6: lot of money that they put toward sort of making
• 18:31
  Speaker 6: the case for them continuing to sell their products and
• 18:35
  Speaker 6: to try to minimize the kind of warnings or signals
• 18:39
  Speaker 6: or messages that might dissuade people from tobacco products. And
• 18:43
  Speaker 6: you know, they have fought tooth and nail against graphic
• 18:46
  Speaker 6: warning labels, and in our country so far that has
• 18:50
  Speaker 6: actually blocked us or prevented us from.
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: That was the reason that I mean, that's so fucked up. Sorry, Okay,
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: So other countries have been able to get them buy
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: because they're on packets of Marlboro or whatever. In Montreal
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: and Canada. Why I was in Montreal. But you're saying
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: in the United States, they've successfully said legally you can't
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: do that.
• 19:12
  Speaker 6: Yeah, so it's complhand and tied up in free speech
• 19:15
  Speaker 6: arguments et cetera. That they are, you know, that have
• 19:17
  Speaker 6: been trying folks have tried to use those kind of
• 19:19
  Speaker 6: arguments to say you can't put graphic warning labels on these, uh,
• 19:23
  Speaker 6: you know, on these cigarette boxes. Now, from a purely
• 19:26
  Speaker 6: public health perspective, and again I'm not a lawyer, not
• 19:28
  Speaker 6: going to claim to be a lawyer, but from a
• 19:30
  Speaker 6: purely public health perspective, we know that graphic warning labels
• 19:35
  Speaker 6: are more effective with just because more clearly. But but
• 19:42
  Speaker 6: this is where, just more broadly, I worry because, look,
• 19:45
  Speaker 6: the tobacco is not just a problem in the US, right,
• 19:47
  Speaker 6: It's a problem all across the world. And imagine if
• 19:50
  Speaker 6: you're a smaller country that doesn't have the kind of
• 19:54
  Speaker 6: resources that the tobacco industry does to hire lots of
• 19:57
  Speaker 6: lawyers and to try to fight you know again, and them,
• 20:00
  Speaker 6: you know, coming into your country and trying to market
• 20:03
  Speaker 6: these products across the population, You're in a much you're
• 20:07
  Speaker 6: you're much worse off. And so this is a problem
• 20:11
  Speaker 6: where I think the the industry, look, there really is
• 20:14
  Speaker 6: no from a health perspective, there's no redeeming positive quality
• 20:18
  Speaker 6: of tobacco. What it does is it contributes to our
• 20:21
  Speaker 6: risk of death, disability, and disease. We've known that for
• 20:25
  Speaker 6: a long time. But every time we put out a
• 20:28
  Speaker 6: new Surgeon General's report on tobacco, we find more and
• 20:31
  Speaker 6: more diseases that are made more likely if you use tobacco.
• 20:34
  Speaker 6: Like in nineteen sixty four, when the first report came out,
• 20:37
  Speaker 6: it was just about cancer, right, it was about lung
• 20:39
  Speaker 6: cancer in particular, and now we know it's multiple types
• 20:43
  Speaker 6: of cancers, it's diabetes, it's heart disease, it's a whole
• 20:47
  Speaker 6: host of conditions that are made worse, you know, by
• 20:51
  Speaker 6: and you're at more wrist risk of really when you
• 20:54
  Speaker 6: use tobacco products. So I worry that. To get to
• 20:57
  Speaker 6: Donald's question that you know, sometimes people think, because they
• 21:01
  Speaker 6: hear about all the other public health issues out there,
• 21:02
  Speaker 6: they think, oh, cigarettes, wasn't that a problem like back
• 21:05
  Speaker 6: in the day, didn't we solve that problem? Well, the
• 21:07
  Speaker 6: answer is no, we made progress. So in nineteen sixty four,
• 21:11
  Speaker 6: forty two percent of American smoke right right now. Thankfully,
• 21:15
  Speaker 6: the rate of cigarette use is under twelve percent. That's
• 21:19
  Speaker 6: a lot. That's a lot of progress. That's a lot
• 21:21
  Speaker 6: of progress. But what has happened is what Donald mentioned,
• 21:24
  Speaker 6: which is that the rates of vaping, especially among the youth,
• 21:28
  Speaker 6: among young people, have gone up exactly and they think, oh,
• 21:32
  Speaker 6: this is benign, it's not harmful. But what's really concerning
• 21:36
  Speaker 6: to us and the reason in twenty sixteen I issue
• 21:39
  Speaker 6: that actual Surgeon General's Report on youth you know vaping,
• 21:42
  Speaker 6: was because young people, when they shouldn't be on tobacco
• 21:46
  Speaker 6: for any reason, but when they're introduced to tobacco products
• 21:49
  Speaker 6: through vaping, not only does it addict them to nicotine,
• 21:53
  Speaker 6: but it also increases their risk of using traditional cigarettes
• 21:57
  Speaker 6: and other tobacco products down the line, which we know
• 22:00
  Speaker 6: are really dangerous for your health.
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, how have they been able to have all that?
• 22:06
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's so clearly the cigarette industry found another
• 22:10
  Speaker 2: way to get these kids hooked. They went, what if
• 22:12
  Speaker 2: we put it in colorful little canisters and give it
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: a strawberry flavor. I mean, it's so sinister. Have you
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: have you had? I'm sure you've tried, But there's have
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: you had any luck pushing back. I remember reading something
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: about Jewel, the company Jewel being closed down for somebody.
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: What has been your success with controlling vaping with kids,
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: because I mean occasionally I'm around a young person and
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: a teenager and you just see they're all sucking on
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: those jewels or whatever the vape things.
• 22:43
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I know they are, and look there too. I
• 22:46
  Speaker 6: think we've made some progress. You know, after our report
• 22:49
  Speaker 6: came out, we actually called for aggressive action that the
• 22:52
  Speaker 6: government took for the government to take to actually reduce
• 22:55
  Speaker 6: the availability and use of these products in the market.
• 22:58
  Speaker 6: Of these products the kids and the FDA ultimately did
• 23:01
  Speaker 6: step in and put in a series of steps regulatory
• 23:05
  Speaker 6: steps to start clawing back you know, what has become
• 23:08
  Speaker 6: dangerous levels of use among kids. And for that reason,
• 23:11
  Speaker 6: they've been able to take some of these dangerous products
• 23:13
  Speaker 6: off the shelves. They really what they did is, in
• 23:16
  Speaker 6: some ways they put the burden on tobacco companies to
• 23:19
  Speaker 6: prove that their products actually have a public health benefit
• 23:22
  Speaker 6: and if they don't, then they shouldn't stay on the market.
• 23:25
  Speaker 6: They also took on flavors, which is which you raised it.
• 23:30
  Speaker 6: So there's so many flavors that appeal to kids. And
• 23:32
  Speaker 6: one thing we know from their data is that flavors
• 23:34
  Speaker 6: are the number one reason cited by kids as to
• 23:37
  Speaker 6: why they're use e cigarettes or vaping devices. And think
• 23:42
  Speaker 6: about like watermelon flavors, gummy bear flavors, all of these
• 23:44
  Speaker 6: flavors are really appealing to kids. So the FDA has
• 23:48
  Speaker 6: since our report came out, taken action against flavors as well.
• 23:53
  Speaker 6: But the bottom line is we use said Zach, which
• 23:55
  Speaker 6: is that the industry is proven historically to be very
• 24:00
  Speaker 6: creative at finding ways to continue to build and expand
• 24:05
  Speaker 6: their markets for their products, and so we've got to
• 24:08
  Speaker 6: make sure that the regulatory like apparatus that these rules
• 24:12
  Speaker 6: and laws actually keep up with the industry and then
• 24:15
  Speaker 6: hopefully go beyond and think ahead of where they're going.
• 24:19
  Speaker 6: Because the truth is, as long as we're continuing to
• 24:22
  Speaker 6: make tobacco products available and they are going to continue
• 24:27
  Speaker 6: to cause depth disease and disability. And it is having
• 24:30
  Speaker 6: taken care of many pay patients over the years who
• 24:33
  Speaker 6: have suffered as a result of tobacco driven disease, it
• 24:37
  Speaker 6: is just heartbreaking to see those avoidable deaths.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: What's your relationship with the FDA, Like, do you have
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: them like on speed dial? Are you like, yo, come on, man,
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: I need you to pass this shit already, my guy.
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: A chain is a text Is there a text chain
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: with emojis?
• 24:59
  Speaker 6: There is not textan with emojis, at least if there is,
• 25:02
  Speaker 6: I'm not on that chain. But you know, I talked
• 25:05
  Speaker 6: to folks, you know, across the federal agencies, at the FDA,
• 25:08
  Speaker 6: at other federal agencies. But it's really important to say
• 25:11
  Speaker 6: that the FDA is an independent agency, just like our
• 25:14
  Speaker 6: office Office of the Surgeon General is independent. So they
• 25:17
  Speaker 6: make their own decisions about, you know, what drugs they approve,
• 25:22
  Speaker 6: what recommendations they make, what they do when it comes
• 25:25
  Speaker 6: to regulating tobacco products. We certainly provide our input and advice,
• 25:30
  Speaker 6: and but they ultimately make their own decisions.
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: I wish they made decisions a little bit faster sometimes,
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: that's all.
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. I hope that you can. I hope
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: that because of this podcast and how successful it is,
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: you're going to be able to get more graphic warnings
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: on cigarettes, because you know, it's interesting. They become like
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: a conversation topic. Someone drops one of those on a
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: table in a restaurant in Montreal, and then everyone I
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: found starts talking about it, and then all of a sudden,
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: it was like, oh my god, look at that picture.
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: That is so nasty, that's so gross. But then people
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: are talking about cigarettes and talking about how you shouldn't
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: be smoking. It generates conversation like like, of course it
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: was intended to So I really feel that would be
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: that would be powerful in this country too, and I
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: think it's a shame that you guys have yet to
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: be able to get that through.
• 26:20
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I couldn't agree with you more. I think not
• 26:22
  Speaker 6: only do I think that would be helpful, but look
• 26:24
  Speaker 6: in terms of this speed of things. You know, there
• 26:26
  Speaker 6: are a lot of really hard working folks in government
• 26:29
  Speaker 6: are trying to move things fast, and they're trying to
• 26:32
  Speaker 6: you know, they came to government because they want to
• 26:34
  Speaker 6: help people. But the bottom line is there are a
• 26:36
  Speaker 6: lot of things that make the governments work slow. Even
• 26:40
  Speaker 6: just think about legislation right like we have been you know,
• 26:44
  Speaker 6: I and many others have been pushing to get legislation
• 26:48
  Speaker 6: passed that would help protect kids against the harms of
• 26:51
  Speaker 6: social media. You know, I put out an.
• 26:54
  Speaker 7: Advisory Cgional's advisory in May of this past year, but
• 26:57
  Speaker 7: I've been talking about a long before then, continue to
• 26:59
  Speaker 7: talking about it more afterward, about the urgent need for
• 27:02
  Speaker 7: us to have safety standards in place to protect kids from,
• 27:06
  Speaker 7: you know, being from what they're being supposed to right now,
• 27:08
  Speaker 7: which is harmful content, pornography, extreme violence, but also from
• 27:13
  Speaker 7: the bullying and harassment that's taking place, and including from strangers,
• 27:17
  Speaker 7: and the addictive features on these on these platforms sucks
• 27:21
  Speaker 7: kids in and takes their time away from sleep, from
• 27:24
  Speaker 7: in person interaction, from learning time in class.
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: So we one other thing. Once they get not to
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: cut you off. Also, once they get off the thing,
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: they are freaking so agitated and so discombobulated. Trust me,
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: as a kid who as a as a dad who
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: has as a father of a kid who plays video
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: games on iPads with his friends on social media. When
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: he's asked to get off, the energy that has shifted
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: in him is so ridiculous. He is so angry and
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: so upset. So yeah, dude, I am with you on that.
• 28:00
  Speaker 6: I'm sorry, go on, yeah No, And to your point
• 28:03
  Speaker 6: on what you mentioned, that behavior is very similar to
• 28:07
  Speaker 6: the behavior that we see when you take a substance
• 28:10
  Speaker 6: away from someone that they're addicted to. It's very, very
• 28:13
  Speaker 6: similar and so and I don't think that that's a coincidence.
• 28:16
  Speaker 6: I think these the platforms. Their goal is to maximize
• 28:20
  Speaker 6: how much time people spend on the platforms, right, That's
• 28:23
  Speaker 6: what actually drives revenue in the bottom line for them.
• 28:26
  Speaker 6: And look as apparent as a doctor, a surgeon general,
• 28:29
  Speaker 6: what I care about is actually time well spent. You know,
• 28:33
  Speaker 6: what they care about is maximizing the amount of time spent.
• 28:37
  Speaker 6: But this is a place where we we got to
• 28:39
  Speaker 6: protect our kids. This isn't look one thing, just to
• 28:42
  Speaker 6: be super clear on this isn't happening because like the
• 28:45
  Speaker 6: current generation of young people have been somehow born into
• 28:48
  Speaker 6: this world with dramatically less will power than prior generations.
• 28:52
  Speaker 6: What's changed is that they are now exposed to tools
• 28:57
  Speaker 6: that are praying on the fact that adolescents are much
• 29:00
  Speaker 6: more sensitive than other people to social comparison and to
• 29:04
  Speaker 6: social suggestion because of their unique phase of brain development.
• 29:08
  Speaker 6: So we've got to step up and protect our kids.
• 29:10
  Speaker 6: I raise that because to your point, Zach about the
• 29:12
  Speaker 6: speed of government, this is a place where we need
• 29:14
  Speaker 6: government to move a lot faster right, Like, we kids
• 29:18
  Speaker 6: can't wait years and years and years for effective legislation
• 29:22
  Speaker 6: to pass and to ultimately be implemented. Their childhood is
• 29:24
  Speaker 6: happening right now. That's why I'm going to continue to
• 29:27
  Speaker 6: do everything I can, certainly to push Congress and to
• 29:30
  Speaker 6: tell the public why this is so urgent, so they can,
• 29:32
  Speaker 6: you know, they can do what they need to do
• 29:34
  Speaker 6: to make their wishes known to their lawmakers. But but look,
• 29:39
  Speaker 6: I say, this is the data two kids. Like I
• 29:42
  Speaker 6: worry deeply about the world. Our kids are growing up,
• 29:45
  Speaker 6: and we've got to move faster to make it safer
• 29:48
  Speaker 6: and more supportive for them.
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: I feel like this is an issue, the rare issue
• 29:53
  Speaker 2: where you could unite parties on something because I really listen,
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: I took TikTok off my phone try for like a month,
• 30:01
  Speaker 2: and it was so incredibly addicting, addictive. I found that
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: I really had trouble getting off of it right right
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: when I was like okay, enough, it set me something else.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: I was interested in a way more powerful way personally
• 30:18
  Speaker 2: for me than any of the other social media platforms,
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: and so I was like, I cannot have this on
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: my phone. It's not good for me. It's such a
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: waste of time. And I'm a grown man who can
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: who has the willpower to be like, okay enough, And
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: I think of this drug being given to children. And
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: I'm not a parent myself, but if I was, I
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: would be so concerned for the amount of time they're
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: spending on this app that can be very, very unhealthy
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: for them, telling them they need to look a certain way,
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: telling them they need to act a certain way, making
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: them feel less than about themselves. So I guess my.
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: And there's a great book I recommended before on here
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: that I don't know if you've read, called The Chaos
• 31:02
  Speaker 2: Machine Jo. Well, we should have trying to have that
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: author on here because he's he was a really, really
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: great book, and I recommend it to parents especially. But
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: what do you you know, we have a lot of
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: parents that listen to the show. What can you give
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: them some advice? What does one do? Because their kids
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: all want to be on the same things as their friends, right?
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: What you know? What what do you? What do you?
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: What do you tell a parent about how to control
• 31:24
  Speaker 2: their kids addiction to these social media apps? Because it's
• 31:29
  Speaker 2: clearly not good for any of us.
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna keep it one hundred and it's easier said
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: than done. You're gonna give your anecdote right now, and
• 31:36
  Speaker 1: that ship is out the window when you hear the
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: kid freaking screaming like a banshee in the freaking in
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: the house, and you're like, fine, just take this ship.
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: Just take the fucking gang. Just take it, take it,
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: take it, take it. You know what I mean?
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: Right? Oh yeah, right right, I'm sure And listen, that's
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: that's a ladies and gentlemen. That's right from the Fason household. No,
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: I know, but I I it may may have I
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: don't know. I don't have any answers, but I'm hoping
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: that you can at least give some recommendations to people.
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: I'm sure one of the things is is what age
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: can you hold it off until? Right?
• 32:09
  Speaker 6: Yeah, well, look, this is the dilemma. I think almost
• 32:13
  Speaker 6: every parent is finding themselves in how to manage technology
• 32:16
  Speaker 6: that we didn't grow up with, that we didn't have
• 32:18
  Speaker 6: to manage, that's rapidly evolving, and that's designed to suck
• 32:21
  Speaker 6: our kids in without any limits, right Like, that is
• 32:24
  Speaker 6: a dilemma. And right now, what I would tell parents
• 32:27
  Speaker 6: out there is just no Number one, you're not struggling
• 32:29
  Speaker 6: alone here every other parent is dealing with this. I
• 32:32
  Speaker 6: say that because I run into a lot of parents
• 32:34
  Speaker 6: who think, hey, every other parent has figured this out.
• 32:37
  Speaker 6: I'm the failure because I haven't figured out how to
• 32:38
  Speaker 6: manage this with my kids. So number one, that's not true.
• 32:42
  Speaker 6: Number Two, I think the important thing to realize is
• 32:44
  Speaker 6: that we can start a lot of this work by
• 32:48
  Speaker 6: initiating a conversation with our kids about how we use technology,
• 32:52
  Speaker 6: how technology makes them feel. There's so many young people
• 32:56
  Speaker 6: I talk to who are on social media who have
• 32:58
  Speaker 6: a lot of insight into how it's making them feel,
• 33:00
  Speaker 6: who often say, you know, I feeling great about my
• 33:03
  Speaker 6: day that I go on social and I see all
• 33:05
  Speaker 6: the stuff that other people are doing and I just
• 33:06
  Speaker 6: don't feel so great as a result. Or I see
• 33:08
  Speaker 6: people doing stuff without me and then I start to
• 33:10
  Speaker 6: feel left out. And all of that is important, but
• 33:14
  Speaker 6: when a child is processing that alone, it can be
• 33:17
  Speaker 6: even more stressful. So starting a conversation with your child
• 33:20
  Speaker 6: about how they're using social media, how it's making them feel.
• 33:23
  Speaker 6: Are they having dangerous interactions or are they being approached
• 33:26
  Speaker 6: by strangers, Like six out of ten adolescent girls are
• 33:29
  Speaker 6: right now yeah, in ways that are making them feel uncomfortable.
• 33:33
  Speaker 6: These are things it's important to start a conversation on
• 33:36
  Speaker 6: the second. Here's another thing I would do. If you're
• 33:38
  Speaker 6: a parent whose child is not yet on social media,
• 33:41
  Speaker 6: I would seek to delay their use of social media
• 33:46
  Speaker 6: until past middle school if you can. This is a
• 33:49
  Speaker 6: lot easier said than done, because a lot of the
• 33:51
  Speaker 6: people around them, a lot of the kids around them,
• 33:52
  Speaker 6: are going to be on social and they're gonna.
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: Say, hey, everybody has phones already.
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: It's fine, parent, But a parent can can say you
• 34:00
  Speaker 2: can have a phone, but you're knocking down social media
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: right so they can There's an asterisk to that, which
• 34:06
  Speaker 2: I'll get you in a second, because it can be
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: a tricky to do that because sometimes kids will download
• 34:10
  Speaker 2: and use apps and create accounts without your knowledge of them.
• 34:12
  Speaker 2: Even if you are a thoughtful, conscientious parent who's monitoring
• 34:15
  Speaker 2: their phone. There are ways to hide apps and to
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: essentially keeping in the dark as a parent, But delaying
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: the use until past middle school is ideal. And here's why.
• 34:24
  Speaker 6: Because adolescence is a unique time when our kids' brains
• 34:28
  Speaker 6: and their socialized are developing, when they're more vulnerable. If
• 34:30
  Speaker 6: you will to the harms that social media may cause.
• 34:34
  Speaker 6: But the early adolescent period, when they're in middle school
• 34:37
  Speaker 6: is when they're particularly sensitive. So delaying passe is helpful. Now,
• 34:41
  Speaker 6: doing it on your own is very hard. But if
• 34:44
  Speaker 6: you can partner with a few other parents, yeah, who
• 34:48
  Speaker 6: may also have similar concerns about their kids, who may
• 34:51
  Speaker 6: want to keep them safe, that becomes a lot easier.
• 34:53
  Speaker 6: You have more supporter as a parent. But your kids
• 34:55
  Speaker 6: also know, hey, I'm not the only one. Donald's kids
• 34:58
  Speaker 6: are also not getting to use this in middle school,
• 35:01
  Speaker 6: Zax kids aren't getting to us this like they'll know right,
• 35:03
  Speaker 6: like that they're at least not alone.
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: Ideally with the with the kids friend group, right, you know,
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: saying hey, we four parents are going to band together.
• 35:11
  Speaker 6: And exactly exactly, so that makes it a little more sustainable.
• 35:15
  Speaker 6: Let me say one last word though, about well two
• 35:18
  Speaker 6: last things. One is about what to do if your
• 35:20
  Speaker 6: kids already on social media, right, because that can be hard,
• 35:22
  Speaker 6: you know, like taking it away from them, Like I
• 35:25
  Speaker 6: know that that is not an easy proposition.
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: But taking a drug away, yeah, and.
• 35:29
  Speaker 6: It's it's it can be incredibly painful if it's not
• 35:32
  Speaker 6: done in the right way, right, Just like cutting somebody
• 35:35
  Speaker 6: off immediately without any support you know, from a substance
• 35:38
  Speaker 6: addicted to could be potentially harmful to them without the
• 35:41
  Speaker 6: right you know process. So here, what I would say
• 35:44
  Speaker 6: is a place to start is to create a few
• 35:47
  Speaker 6: tech freeze zones in your child's life. And specifically the
• 35:52
  Speaker 6: areas I would protect in their day are there times
• 35:54
  Speaker 6: for sleep, learning, and in person interaction. Those are the
• 35:58
  Speaker 6: three things our kids need in our to grow, develop
• 36:01
  Speaker 6: and thrive. And that could mean an hour before your
• 36:04
  Speaker 6: child goes to bed and throughout the night they don't
• 36:06
  Speaker 6: have access to their devices. I was just with a
• 36:09
  Speaker 6: parent the other day at an event that I was at,
• 36:11
  Speaker 6: who said, you know, we started a practice in middle
• 36:13
  Speaker 6: school if everyone charges their phones in our bedroom, they
• 36:17
  Speaker 6: don't take their phones into their bedrooms. And we're still
• 36:19
  Speaker 6: doing that to this day even though our kids are
• 36:21
  Speaker 6: in high school. And it keeps protect their sleep, protecting
• 36:24
  Speaker 6: their in person time from tech. So time around the
• 36:27
  Speaker 6: dinner table, time when they're hanging out with their friend,
• 36:29
  Speaker 6: you know, with friends at home, when they're family gatherings
• 36:33
  Speaker 6: also important, and time learning. So many kids are actually
• 36:35
  Speaker 6: on their devices in school in class while they're doing
• 36:39
  Speaker 6: their homework, and I'll tell you this. You know, like
• 36:41
  Speaker 6: we overestimate how good we are at multitasking. We think, oh,
• 36:44
  Speaker 6: we can pay attention to this and that at the
• 36:46
  Speaker 6: same time be on our phone. I'll listen to a conversation.
• 36:48
  Speaker 6: The signs is super clear that we're really bad and multitasking.
• 36:51
  Speaker 6: What we do is we task switch rapidly. So if
• 36:54
  Speaker 6: we're looking at that text that popped up on our
• 36:56
  Speaker 6: phone in class, we're not actually hearing what our teacher
• 36:59
  Speaker 6: is saying. So I would this is a place where
• 37:02
  Speaker 6: parents are speaking up more and more in schools to say, hey,
• 37:05
  Speaker 6: can we make classrooms a tech free space? You know,
• 37:09
  Speaker 6: the kids can maybe use them in between classes or
• 37:11
  Speaker 6: I can't.
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: Believe they're not. I mean, I'm sorry for being naive
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: because I don't have any kids, but I would daydream
• 37:17
  Speaker 2: of a world where the teacher is saying, like, no phones.
• 37:20
  Speaker 2: You're saying a lot of kids are doing it under
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: their desk or whatever. But this must be hard for
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: them to police.
• 37:26
  Speaker 6: Well, so that's one of the reasons I think it's
• 37:28
  Speaker 6: been challenging for schools. A lot of them have policies
• 37:30
  Speaker 6: they're just not enforced. But the schools that I've Ever
• 37:33
  Speaker 6: since our social media advisory came out on kids' mental
• 37:37
  Speaker 6: health in earlier this year, we've heard from more and
• 37:41
  Speaker 6: more schools that have used that sort of as a
• 37:43
  Speaker 6: way to go to their parent communities and say, look,
• 37:46
  Speaker 6: we've got to now create these tech free zones in
• 37:48
  Speaker 6: our classroom. And one of them I ran into actually
• 37:51
  Speaker 6: a school in Indiana when I was visiting, and they
• 37:54
  Speaker 6: told me, they said, actually, after we implemented that policy,
• 37:57
  Speaker 6: a couple of things we noticed almost right away. We
• 38:00
  Speaker 6: noticed that we heard kids actually talking to each other
• 38:03
  Speaker 6: more in the hallways during lunchtime. We actually saw them
• 38:06
  Speaker 6: playing games like whether it was Jenga or card games
• 38:09
  Speaker 6: or other things in between classes when they had some
• 38:12
  Speaker 6: downtime that wasn't happening before everyone was on their devices.
• 38:16
  Speaker 6: They weren't actually interacting with each other. So anyway, these
• 38:19
  Speaker 6: are our places or some small steps we can take.
• 38:21
  Speaker 6: But a last they see to Donald's point about the phones,
• 38:24
  Speaker 6: here's the tricky thing the phones. Smartphones in particular are
• 38:30
  Speaker 6: easy to load apps onto, and those apps can often
• 38:32
  Speaker 6: be hidden. I have heard so many heartbreaking stories from
• 38:36
  Speaker 6: parents who have lost their children to suicide after their
• 38:40
  Speaker 6: child was mercilessly bullied and harassed on social media, and
• 38:45
  Speaker 6: they were really monitoring those phones, but they only realized
• 38:48
  Speaker 6: after their child passed that they were all of these
• 38:51
  Speaker 6: accounts that they had that they didn't know about and
• 38:53
  Speaker 6: apps that they were hiding that the parent wasn't aware of.
• 38:56
  Speaker 6: So there are more and more parents who are actually
• 38:58
  Speaker 6: doing this. They're saying, yeah, I want my kid to
• 39:00
  Speaker 6: be safe, to be able to make a call if
• 39:02
  Speaker 6: there's an issue, to be able to get help, to
• 39:05
  Speaker 6: be in touch with me, but they're actually trying to
• 39:07
  Speaker 6: get them what you can call dumb phones, so phones
• 39:10
  Speaker 6: that we used to use back in the day when.
• 39:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah that Motorola Star tech baby.
• 39:17
  Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean the phones which allow you to make
• 39:19
  Speaker 6: phone calls and text, but which don't allow you to
• 39:21
  Speaker 6: actually download apps. So those might seem old school Sidekick
• 39:26
  Speaker 6: mobile Sidekick Baby, get back, y'all, I think that may
• 39:29
  Speaker 6: have had apps. I'm not sure.
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: Well, we're going to take a break, but we both
• 39:33
  Speaker 2: have so many more questions for you. We're so glad
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: you're here. I want to get to one of the
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: latest things that you're speaking about and spreading the word about.
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: I had the problem which I believe that too.
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: What's that You.
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: Had the perfect segue?
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: Okay, well, can we need to take a break and
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: then you can go back to your segue. Everyone remember
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: where we are at and then listen to these ads.
• 39:51
  Speaker 2: When we come back. Donald is going to be in
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: charge of the segue. We'll be right back, all right, Donald,
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: what was your segue? Everyone remembered where we were.
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: So you left office and things were kind of normal.
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: You came back to office and there was a Clusterfuck,
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: let's keep it one hundred. Like everything had switched. The
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: world had changed, and not only had it changed, people
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: were staying at home because of the change that had
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: come caused loneliness. Caused a lot of loneliness, caused a
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: lot of fear. And you're combating that right now.
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: My correct, That was very good, Donald. I mean, you
• 40:48
  Speaker 2: know where we think we're decent podcast hosts, vivic. But
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: I just want to give my I want to give
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: you your flowers. Donald. That was nicely done.
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: I'll take that. I'll take that.
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: I'll take that level segue. That was very nice. If
• 41:02
  Speaker 2: I could just piggyback off of it, the loneliness epidemic
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: was happening question mark and then COVID magnified it exponentially.
• 41:13
  Speaker 2: Is that true?
• 41:14
  Speaker 6: That's exactly right. Yeah, it was. It was a fire
• 41:17
  Speaker 6: that was burning for years and then COVID just dumped
• 41:20
  Speaker 6: a whole lot of fuel on it and made loneliness
• 41:23
  Speaker 6: much worse. But yeah, this was a problem before. In fact,
• 41:26
  Speaker 6: I was seeing loneliness in communities when I was traveling
• 41:30
  Speaker 6: around the country in twenty fifteen during my first stinto
• 41:33
  Speaker 6: Surgeon General. It was and that's actually what made me
• 41:35
  Speaker 6: realize that this was a public health issue. You see,
• 41:38
  Speaker 6: before that like I never learned about loneliness in medical school,
• 41:42
  Speaker 6: Like we were never taught it was a health issue.
• 41:45
  Speaker 6: But I knew what it felt like because as a kid,
• 41:47
  Speaker 6: I struggled a lot with loneliness.
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: Myself.
• 41:50
  Speaker 6: I was, you know, it was one of those kids
• 41:52
  Speaker 6: who didn't really want to go to school most days,
• 41:55
  Speaker 6: and I would often fake having a stomach ache so
• 41:57
  Speaker 6: that my mom would, you know, take pity on me
• 41:59
  Speaker 6: and let me stay at home. Not because she doesn't
• 42:01
  Speaker 6: know that, by the way, And I don't know if
• 42:03
  Speaker 6: she listens to this podcast or not, but if.
• 42:04
  Speaker 2: She does, she does, everyone does everyone, And.
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: Also listen, let's be honest, man, you did fake you did.
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: You got out of school a lot. But look at
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: you now you're a surgeon general.
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: So I'm listening. You know, I know that Obama listens.
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: So just watch your words, watch.
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: Your be careful, be careful, careful.
• 42:22
  Speaker 2: Don't don't dis Obama because he listens, all right for
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: how we talk.
• 42:28
  Speaker 6: Yeah, But you know, the thing is I did all
• 42:29
  Speaker 6: that because I was not because I was scared about
• 42:32
  Speaker 6: teachers or tests. I was scared about going to the
• 42:34
  Speaker 6: cafeteria lunchtime one more time and not having someone to
• 42:38
  Speaker 6: sit next to, or being on the playground and being
• 42:41
  Speaker 6: scared that I wouldn't get chosen to be on someone's team,
• 42:44
  Speaker 6: even though it was a pretty decent athlete, because I
• 42:46
  Speaker 6: just didn't have that many friends. So I knew that
• 42:49
  Speaker 6: feeling personally, and I actually saw it in a lot
• 42:51
  Speaker 6: of my patients, you know, when I as a doctor.
• 42:53
  Speaker 6: But I didn't realize how widespread it was until I
• 42:56
  Speaker 6: started traveling as surge in general and hearing from people
• 42:59
  Speaker 6: who would things like, you know, I feel like I
• 43:02
  Speaker 6: just walked through life, you know, carrying all these burdens
• 43:05
  Speaker 6: by myself. Or I feel like if I disappeared tomorrow,
• 43:08
  Speaker 6: nobody would care, nobody would notice, or I feel invisible.
• 43:11
  Speaker 6: And I was hearing this from college students who are
• 43:14
  Speaker 6: surrounded by hundreds of other students on campus, like from
• 43:17
  Speaker 6: moms and dads who were like a busy workplace. I
• 43:19
  Speaker 6: was hearing this from CEOs and from members of Congress.
• 43:22
  Speaker 6: Everybody seemed to have their own stories and struggles with loneliness.
• 43:26
  Speaker 6: So that's what got me interested in exploring this deeper.
• 43:29
  Speaker 6: And as I did, I realized two big things. One
• 43:32
  Speaker 6: is that loneliness is extremely common. One in two adults
• 43:35
  Speaker 6: have measurable levels of loneliness in the United States, and
• 43:38
  Speaker 6: even the numbers are even higher among kids. But I
• 43:40
  Speaker 6: also came to realize how consequential loneliness is for both
• 43:44
  Speaker 6: our mental health and our physical health, and that really
• 43:47
  Speaker 6: surprised me absolutely.
• 43:49
  Speaker 1: I mean I think about it all the time, Like
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: you know, some people can strue loneliness as well. I'm
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: by myself all the time. But you could be lonely
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: and be surrounded by a bunch of people, you could
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: be you could be lonely and have and and have
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: a wife or a husband and children surrounding you and
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: still feel lonely and still feel alone. It's it's it
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: you say, one in two. Wow, I feel like everybody
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: at some point experiences loneliness.
• 44:18
  Speaker 6: I think you're right, and I think I think one
• 44:20
  Speaker 6: in two is actually an underestimate because that's the number
• 44:23
  Speaker 6: of people who are actually willing to admit to it
• 44:25
  Speaker 6: right on a survey. But I think there's this sense
• 44:28
  Speaker 6: of shame also that surrounds loneliness where we we think.
• 44:32
  Speaker 6: And this is how I felt when I was a
• 44:33
  Speaker 6: kid and at times when I was an adult, and
• 44:35
  Speaker 6: I struggled with loneliness. But I felt like, you know,
• 44:38
  Speaker 6: I'm lonely because I I'm not likable, I did something wrong.
• 44:41
  Speaker 6: I'm not like interesting enough, Like you think it's something
• 44:43
  Speaker 6: about you, you know that is making you, uh, you know,
• 44:46
  Speaker 6: not someone the folks want to hang out with. And
• 44:48
  Speaker 6: it doesn't feel great to admit that. So I think
• 44:50
  Speaker 6: people actually keep that under wraps.
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: Did the did did social media, which we thought would
• 44:56
  Speaker 2: would make people more connected? Did did it tribute to
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: this isolation?
• 45:02
  Speaker 6: I believe it has, yeah, And I think the intent
• 45:05
  Speaker 6: was to actually build community. But what ended up happening
• 45:08
  Speaker 6: with social media were a couple of interesting and really
• 45:12
  Speaker 6: concerning things. One is that people started shifting more of
• 45:16
  Speaker 6: what used to be offline in person friendships to online friendships.
• 45:21
  Speaker 6: They started valuing quantity number of friends over the quality
• 45:26
  Speaker 6: of friends, regardless of how few they were. I still
• 45:28
  Speaker 6: remember in the early days of social media, people always
• 45:30
  Speaker 6: talk about how many friends do you have? Like I
• 45:32
  Speaker 6: have this many. Oh, now I'm getting to that level,
• 45:34
  Speaker 6: and I'm getting to that level. Contacts are not necessarily friends,
• 45:37
  Speaker 6: like online acquaintances don't necessarily translate to somebody who can
• 45:41
  Speaker 6: be there for you during a crisis, right. I think
• 45:44
  Speaker 6: the last thing that happened, which is more insidious but
• 45:47
  Speaker 6: really important, is that I think for many people, social
• 45:49
  Speaker 6: media ended up shredding their self esteem, not all at once,
• 45:53
  Speaker 6: gradually over time. But it doesn't matter like how rich, powerful,
• 45:57
  Speaker 6: accomplished you are, whatever. When you're constantly comparing yourself help
• 46:00
  Speaker 6: to what people are posting online, you're gonna feel worse
• 46:04
  Speaker 6: about your life. And that's even though we know like
• 46:06
  Speaker 6: that that's not one hundred percent real, that people are
• 46:08
  Speaker 6: curating and selecting what they post. It actually turns it
• 46:12
  Speaker 6: turns out that that doesn't insulate us from feeling worse
• 46:14
  Speaker 6: about ourselves, and so that that I think has had
• 46:17
  Speaker 6: an impact because imagine if you if you feel worse
• 46:20
  Speaker 6: and worse about yourself, less confident in who you are,
• 46:22
  Speaker 6: it makes it harder to actually go and put yourself
• 46:24
  Speaker 6: out there and meet other people and build a relationship friendship.
• 46:28
  Speaker 6: And so I think all of this together has actually
• 46:31
  Speaker 6: contributed to greater loneliness in the population.
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: Social media has contributed to so many of the lives
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: that are out there right now, Like now, some of
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: y'all don't look like that. I'm gonna keep it one
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: hundred like some of y'all, but putting filter after filter
• 46:46
  Speaker 1: after filter on your face and we know, okay, because
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: ain't nobody skin that perfect?
• 46:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Okay, well you're too much?
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: Am I going too far?
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: No? True? Do you have a filter on right now?
• 47:00
  Speaker 1: Because you know what happened.
• 47:06
  Speaker 6: I wish, I wish I was sophisticated enough to even
• 47:09
  Speaker 6: know how to put a filter on.
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: But I'm just I don't have so handsome Oh man,
• 47:13
  Speaker 1: thank you, no doubt.
• 47:15
  Speaker 2: I will tell my mother you said that. She'll be
• 47:17
  Speaker 2: very proud. She's listening. Of course, he's right in a
• 47:21
  Speaker 2: sense that the filters and everything makes you know adds
• 47:26
  Speaker 2: to a heightened sense of people feeling like, gosh, I
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: don't look like that. I'm not.
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: That's what I was, That's what I was trying to
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: get at, Like sincerely, man, Like, there's nothing real on
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: social media. Everything that's posted is a heightened reality, and
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: we all know it, but we still try to keep
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: up with it. We try to keep we all get
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: the we get the latest filters ourselves or we get
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: the you know what I mean.
• 47:47
  Speaker 6: Yeah, And look, there's the thing is that there's a
• 47:50
  Speaker 6: fine line between using some of these features for fun
• 47:54
  Speaker 6: and then slipping into a world where that becomes the norm.
• 47:58
  Speaker 6: And I think that's what's happened like really quickly here
• 48:01
  Speaker 6: with social media. So look, I think part of our
• 48:03
  Speaker 6: challenge and like in this moment in our lives and
• 48:05
  Speaker 6: in society, is to figure out how to how to
• 48:09
  Speaker 6: start living real life as opposed to living our lives
• 48:13
  Speaker 6: mostly online, which is what's happening to most people. Like
• 48:16
  Speaker 6: real life is happening offline's and we need to get
• 48:20
  Speaker 6: people to a place where they have the space, the
• 48:22
  Speaker 6: opportunities to comfort, the skills to actually engage.
• 48:25
  Speaker 2: With one another.
• 48:26
  Speaker 6: I'll honestly say this it's not always about like major
• 48:29
  Speaker 6: massive transformation of your life. Like sometimes like just a
• 48:33
  Speaker 6: little bit of interaction can go a long way to
• 48:36
  Speaker 6: making us feel better, Like stopping to say hello to
• 48:39
  Speaker 6: somebody on the way out out of work, you know,
• 48:41
  Speaker 6: just to check on them, see how they're doing, picking
• 48:43
  Speaker 6: up the phone to call a friend on your way
• 48:45
  Speaker 6: to work just to say hey, yeah, I was thinking
• 48:48
  Speaker 6: about you. Just want to know what you're up to,
• 48:49
  Speaker 6: how you're doing, or dropping somebody aline just to say hey,
• 48:53
  Speaker 6: I remember that thing you did for me last week
• 48:54
  Speaker 6: and that it really helped.
• 48:56
  Speaker 1: Me a lot.
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: You know, I was having a bad day. Thanks for
• 48:58
  Speaker 2: reaching out for me to me, Thanks for thinking about me.
• 49:01
  Speaker 6: These things can take like a minute, two minutes, but
• 49:04
  Speaker 6: they make us feel so much better, more human, more connected,
• 49:08
  Speaker 6: because the truth is, like you know, we evolved over
• 49:10
  Speaker 6: thousands of years to not just like listen to the
• 49:13
  Speaker 6: content of what each other is saying, but to like
• 49:16
  Speaker 6: to perceive and to take in like your facial expression,
• 49:19
  Speaker 6: your body language, the tone of your voice, your physical presence.
• 49:23
  Speaker 6: And when we have all of that which we have
• 49:25
  Speaker 6: an in person interaction, it goes so much farther and
• 49:28
  Speaker 6: is so much richer for us than we are when
• 49:30
  Speaker 6: we are solely relying. Let's say I'm texting somebody or
• 49:33
  Speaker 6: emailing them to communicate.
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: Okay, but here's a question. Then, how do we get
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: out in the world and do all of these things
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: when we hate each other? Right now? You know what
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: I mean? Like, that's where we're at right now as
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: a as a people. Yeah, we deal with so much hate.
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: This planet is filled with hate. And we're asking people
• 49:55
  Speaker 1: to get out and touch and stuff like that, and
• 49:58
  Speaker 1: a lot of people don't want to be touched by
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: other people, you know what I mean? Like, where how
• 50:02
  Speaker 1: do we can how do we how do we fix that?
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: Like how that there's more to it than just you know,
• 50:11
  Speaker 1: I mean, getting out with loved ones is something different.
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: But I feel like and I and I get where
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: you're coming from with that, but I feel like right now,
• 50:19
  Speaker 1: like I feel like social media, I feel like all
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: of these things are really are what's contributing to the
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: amount of hatred that's going on in this world towards
• 50:31
  Speaker 1: towards one another, you know, and I, you know, I
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: I My question is, how do we combat that If
• 50:40
  Speaker 1: we're going to get out and we're going to start
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: talking to people. And we're going to start doing that,
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: we got to be ready to hear. You know, some
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: people don't want to listen.
• 50:49
  Speaker 6: Yeah, So I think that's the right question, Donald, because
• 50:51
  Speaker 6: I do think you're right, and I don't think you're
• 50:53
  Speaker 6: alone in feeling like the feeling like there's a lot
• 50:57
  Speaker 6: of hate and division and anger like in the world
• 51:00
  Speaker 6: right now, and that makes the more you feel that,
• 51:02
  Speaker 6: the less less you want to reach out to other
• 51:05
  Speaker 6: people or build bridges. Two things I would say here, though,
• 51:08
  Speaker 6: One is I actually think there's actually less hate than
• 51:12
  Speaker 6: we think. And because it is magnified on social media,
• 51:15
  Speaker 6: it's magnified in the traditional media, and it makes us
• 51:17
  Speaker 6: think that that is everyone. That's how everyone feels like
• 51:20
  Speaker 6: these are all the interactions that are happening everywhere. They're
• 51:23
  Speaker 6: actually not. They're a fraction of reality. But here's the
• 51:26
  Speaker 6: second thing. I think we actually hate. It's easier to
• 51:30
  Speaker 6: hate other people when we don't know them, right, And like,
• 51:33
  Speaker 6: if you're always give you a simple example, if you're
• 51:35
  Speaker 6: at work, let's say, and you want to just get
• 51:37
  Speaker 6: to know a few more people, you don't need to
• 51:40
  Speaker 6: like go to your your your person in your neighboring
• 51:43
  Speaker 6: cubicle and say hey, can you have lunch with me
• 51:46
  Speaker 6: so we can talk about the top three most divisive
• 51:48
  Speaker 6: controversial subjects out there, because that's not what people like do, right,
• 51:54
  Speaker 6: You might like we connect on this stuff that we share,
• 51:57
  Speaker 6: Like maybe we both have kids and we were worried
• 52:00
  Speaker 6: about them. Maybe we both love music and we you know,
• 52:03
  Speaker 6: we just went to a concert last night. We can
• 52:04
  Speaker 6: talk about that. Maybe you know, we talk about the
• 52:07
  Speaker 6: work we have. I we talk about the communities and
• 52:09
  Speaker 6: neighborhoods we live in. There's a lot of our life
• 52:11
  Speaker 6: that actually is part of a shared experience that constitutes
• 52:15
  Speaker 6: you know, subjects of conversation and points of connection. Frankly,
• 52:19
  Speaker 6: that can bring us together. And I'll tell you what
• 52:21
  Speaker 6: happens when we do that. When we start learning about
• 52:24
  Speaker 6: people about their family, about their background, about their kids,
• 52:28
  Speaker 6: about their experience in the neighborhood, but their culture, When
• 52:32
  Speaker 6: we started learning about that, it becomes a lot easier
• 52:34
  Speaker 6: for us to manage disagreements. Right, Like you, I don't
• 52:38
  Speaker 6: know if you guys have this, but most people have
• 52:40
  Speaker 6: a relative that they get together with the Thanksgiving who's
• 52:43
  Speaker 6: their crazy uncle or they're crazy aunt. Who's got views
• 52:45
  Speaker 6: that are totally different from them, who they don't can't
• 52:48
  Speaker 6: talk to about politics or whatever it is. But the
• 52:51
  Speaker 6: truth is if that uncle or aunt, we're in a
• 52:53
  Speaker 6: car accident ended up in the hospital, you would show up.
• 52:56
  Speaker 6: If you were in the hospital and you needed something
• 52:58
  Speaker 6: in an emergency, they would you do that because you
• 53:01
  Speaker 6: have a foundation of relationship that allows you to perhaps
• 53:06
  Speaker 6: disagree on things. And you can see though that being
• 53:09
  Speaker 6: beneath that is a real person, right, We're more than
• 53:12
  Speaker 6: the issues we disagree on, like, and that's what building
• 53:15
  Speaker 6: these sort of connections allows us to feel. And that's
• 53:17
  Speaker 6: what I think we have a chance to get back to.
• 53:19
  Speaker 6: That's why I say it happens in the small conversations
• 53:22
  Speaker 6: between neighbors, co workers, between folks, between fellow parents. We
• 53:28
  Speaker 6: have a lot that actually connects us. We're just not
• 53:30
  Speaker 6: hearing or seeing much of that on social media.
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: Or the news. So start in the community.
• 53:36
  Speaker 2: Yes, right out, Yeah, you just made me realize that
• 53:39
  Speaker 2: Thanksgiving this year is going to be a doozy for
• 53:41
  Speaker 2: a lot of people. Like if you look at if
• 53:48
  Speaker 2: you looked at a graph at the most difficult Thanksgivings
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: of the last twenty years. I bet this one's gonna win.
• 53:55
  Speaker 1: Hey, you know what, pretty wrong? You know, this is
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: probably going to be the most I mean just coming
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: out of COVID too though, so everybody is really probably
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: gonna this will probably be the biggest year of congregation
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: on thanks Is that the right word? On Thanksgiving?
• 54:11
  Speaker 4: You know what I mean?
• 54:12
  Speaker 2: Use of congregation? I went to congregation Temple Israel.
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: Let's take a break.
• 54:19
  Speaker 2: We'll be right back after these fine words. I want
• 54:30
  Speaker 2: to talk about on a serious note, On a more
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: serious note, the team suicide rate. In doing some research
• 54:36
  Speaker 2: on you coming on, I read some articles that really
• 54:39
  Speaker 2: blew my mind. I knew that this had increased, but
• 54:42
  Speaker 2: here's something from US News and World Report which I
• 54:45
  Speaker 2: would think would would be accurate. Researchers found that between
• 54:49
  Speaker 2: two thousand and eight and eighteen, suicide rate among thirteen
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: and fourteen year olds nationwide more than doubled, from roughly
• 54:57
  Speaker 2: to deaths per one hundred thousand and two eight to
• 55:00
  Speaker 2: five or one hundred thousand, a stark reversal from a
• 55:04
  Speaker 2: decline that began the nineties and now in the suicide
• 55:08
  Speaker 2: is now the leading cause of death for thirteen fourteen
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: year olds in the United States.
• 55:12
  Speaker 6: That's accurate, right, yeah, and so so disturbing. I mean, like,
• 55:16
  Speaker 6: how did we get here?
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: Right? Right? And before you answered, my gut is to say,
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: what is the big change? The big change is social media?
• 55:25
  Speaker 2: But is it more than that? Like? Why is this
• 55:27
  Speaker 2: fucking happening? And what do parents do?
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: This scares the shit out of me. I'm sorry, Doc,
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: but this does. This is one thing that sincerely.
• 55:37
  Speaker 2: I'm sure it scares everyone out there listening, and it's
• 55:41
  Speaker 2: not something that's talked about a lot. I knew that
• 55:43
  Speaker 2: the suicide rate had increased, but I didn't know it
• 55:45
  Speaker 2: was as stark as that stat. So I wondered, in
• 55:49
  Speaker 2: your position, what do you think the cause of it
• 55:50
  Speaker 2: is and what can be done about it?
• 55:52
  Speaker 6: Well, listen, I don't think there's anything more important as
• 55:55
  Speaker 6: a public health issue than we should be focusing on
• 55:58
  Speaker 6: in youth mental health. I've called this a defining public
• 56:01
  Speaker 6: health crisis of our time, and I firmly believe that,
• 56:04
  Speaker 6: and it's why I've spent the better part of my
• 56:06
  Speaker 6: tenure focused on this issue. I think to understand it
• 56:10
  Speaker 6: where it's coming from. I think we've got to understand that.
• 56:12
  Speaker 6: Yet some of it has to do with the profound
• 56:15
  Speaker 6: impact that social media has had on kids' mental health.
• 56:18
  Speaker 6: I think we've also seen a growing amount of loneliness
• 56:22
  Speaker 6: among kids that is part only partially related to social media.
• 56:27
  Speaker 6: I think there are other contributors to that loneliness as well.
• 56:30
  Speaker 6: But we know that the amount of time that kids
• 56:34
  Speaker 6: spend in person with their friends has actually dropped by
• 56:38
  Speaker 6: fifty percent in the around fifteen years or so prior
• 56:41
  Speaker 6: to the pandemic, and I dropped even further during the pandemic.
• 56:45
  Speaker 6: So there are more and more forces that are taking
• 56:47
  Speaker 6: us away from each other. And look, I think that
• 56:51
  Speaker 6: there's another element to this that we don't talk about enough,
• 56:54
  Speaker 6: which is I think more and more of our kids
• 56:57
  Speaker 6: are becoming the victims of a achievement culture that I
• 57:00
  Speaker 6: don't think serves them right. It's not a culture that
• 57:03
  Speaker 6: says achievement is good or bad. It's not about that.
• 57:06
  Speaker 6: It's about how we define what achievement is and what
• 57:09
  Speaker 6: success is. And I think that we're telling our kids
• 57:13
  Speaker 6: more and more that if they aren't perfect, that they
• 57:18
  Speaker 6: don't have a future. They've got to get into fancy schools,
• 57:20
  Speaker 6: have a long resume, have you know, top grades, et cetera,
• 57:23
  Speaker 6: in order to make it through and be worthy. And again,
• 57:26
  Speaker 6: there's nothing wrong with having good grades, with striving, you know,
• 57:29
  Speaker 6: to get into great schools, with you know, with achievement.
• 57:33
  Speaker 6: There's nothing wrong with it in and of itself. Here's
• 57:34
  Speaker 6: the problem. The problem comes where we define our kids
• 57:38
  Speaker 6: worth their self esteem by whether or not they've met
• 57:43
  Speaker 6: these increasingly stringent standards of success. You know, when I
• 57:47
  Speaker 6: talk to kids around the country, I do a lot
• 57:49
  Speaker 6: of round tables with high school students, with college students,
• 57:53
  Speaker 6: and with even younger students, they tell me that they
• 57:56
  Speaker 6: feel like they're being asked to chase a model of
• 58:00
  Speaker 6: success that says, to make it, you've got to be famous,
• 58:03
  Speaker 6: you've got to be wealthy, you've got to be powerful,
• 58:06
  Speaker 6: and ideally all three. Right, if you get all three,
• 58:09
  Speaker 6: we'll write books about you, we'll make movies about you,
• 58:11
  Speaker 6: we'll write stories about you in the media. But you know,
• 58:15
  Speaker 6: I'll tell you this, I know a lot of people
• 58:18
  Speaker 6: who are rich, powerful and famous and who are really
• 58:20
  Speaker 6: unhappy and not fulfilled. And I know a lot of
• 58:22
  Speaker 6: people who are not rich, who are not powerful, who
• 58:25
  Speaker 6: are not famous, but they're really really happy because they
• 58:28
  Speaker 6: have relationships in their life. They have a sense of purpose,
• 58:32
  Speaker 6: in the role they play in their neighborhood or in
• 58:34
  Speaker 6: their work. That's ultimately what matters, and I think that
• 58:38
  Speaker 6: the focus has shifted so much away from that that
• 58:41
  Speaker 6: that what has become a more toxic achievement culture, combined
• 58:45
  Speaker 6: with loneliness and the negative impacts of social media, I
• 58:48
  Speaker 6: think are combining to hurt our kids. There's one last
• 58:51
  Speaker 6: factor that we have to keep in mind which is
• 58:53
  Speaker 6: hard to ignore, and this is affecting adults too, but
• 58:56
  Speaker 6: it's the negative information environment that we're all surrounded in,
• 59:00
  Speaker 6: like we are drowning in negative doom scrolling.
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: I mean, I mean, I think that term doom scrolling
• 59:05
  Speaker 2: is so relevant because you know, more than ever now
• 59:10
  Speaker 2: you pick up your phone and you're just getting hit
• 59:12
  Speaker 2: with a fire hose of horribleness.
• 59:16
  Speaker 6: That's right, and it's not I'm not saying that we
• 59:18
  Speaker 6: should be blind to the challenges happening around us in
• 59:21
  Speaker 6: the world, but I do think that there's a problem
• 59:24
  Speaker 6: when it is so out of proportion the news that
• 59:27
  Speaker 6: we're getting that it were constantly here and everything that's
• 59:29
  Speaker 6: broken about the world, we're hearing very little about what
• 59:31
  Speaker 6: is right about the world because that's not deemed newsworthy
• 59:34
  Speaker 6: and it doesn't drive clicks, and so if you see
• 59:38
  Speaker 6: that all the time, then you come to believe that
• 59:40
  Speaker 6: that's real, right, that everything is truly broken, that there
• 59:43
  Speaker 6: is no hope in the future. It is very difficult
• 59:46
  Speaker 6: to be happy and fulfilled and content if the future
• 59:49
  Speaker 6: is not bright, if you don't think that there's hope
• 59:52
  Speaker 6: that things are going to continue to be good, that
• 59:54
  Speaker 6: they can get better, that they're going to be great
• 59:56
  Speaker 6: for your kids. And so you put all of this
• 59:58
  Speaker 6: stuff together, the negative and information environment, with social media,
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 6: with loneliness, with this toxic achievement culture, and you have
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 6: a recipe for the youth mental health crisis that we're
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 6: seeing today.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 2: What do you recommend parents who are listening to say
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 2: to their children, Because I've bet a lot of these
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 2: parents who tragically lost their children to suicide would have
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 2: thought that it came out of the blue for them.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: Some some of course, recognize that their children were suffering
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 2: and depressed, but I'm sure many had no idea. What
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 2: do you what do you recommend a parent listening to
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 2: this do with their with their teenager or their adolescent child,
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: with the conversation. They should have to reach out to them.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 6: Yeah, so this is this, I think is one of
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 6: the scariest things for parents. And that is why I
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 6: resonate with what you were saying Donald as well about
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 6: it being scary, because to think that your kid might
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 6: be suffering in silence and you don't know about it,
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 6: and to worry that it may lead to a terrible
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 6: outcome like them harming themselves. I mean, that is every
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 6: parent's worst nightmare, right and so and I feel that too.
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 6: You know, my kids are five and seven. But you know,
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 6: I'll tell you guys like my daughter who's five, when
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 6: she was in preschool just a few months ago last spring,
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 6: she came home one day and asked my wife and
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 6: I if we could post a picture that we had
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 6: taken of her on a social media platform. And she
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 6: actually named the platform. And we're like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 6: You're in preschool, where did this come from. It's not
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 6: a platform that we even use like ourselves, and we
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 6: don't talk about it at home, but her friends in
• 1:01:29
  Speaker 6: pre school we're talking about posting stuff on social media.
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 6: So this is this is a nightmare to manage for parents.
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 6: Here's what I would say to them. Though, one thing
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 6: that remains true is that as parents, our love for
• 1:01:43
  Speaker 6: our children is the most powerful protective force that we
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 6: have to give them. It's important our kids know that
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 6: we love them, that we love them unconditionally. We may
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 6: tell them, they may say nothing, They may like wave
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 6: us off. They may say, ah, you know, you don't
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 6: need to say that you're being sappy. Doesn't matter. Say
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 6: it to your kids. Express it to your kids in
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 6: the moments of darkness and crisis, when they're wondering who
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 6: in the world actually values them and cares about them.
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 6: You want them to remember that their parents do. So
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 6: that's one thing we can remind our kids of. The
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 6: second thing we can do as parents is to I
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 6: start conversations with our children about their mental health. Sometimes
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 6: parents worry, Hey, if I bring it up, maybe it'll
• 1:02:22
  Speaker 6: plant the idea in their head. If I use the
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 6: word depression, maybe it'll lead them to become depressed. If
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 6: I talk about suicide, maybe it'll put that idea in there.
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 6: The studies actually very clearly show that that is not
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 6: the case. More so, what happens is when you raise
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 6: these issues and just to ask your child as they
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 6: are struggled with these Do they know what these are?
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 6: Do they know what to do? If they do start
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 6: to feel like they're depressed or anxious? That actually opens
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 6: things up for your child to recognize that, hey, I
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 6: don't have to be embarrassed about this. I can talk
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 6: to my parents about this. Other people deal with this.
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 6: I don't have to be ashamed. So that's a really
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 6: important conversation to start as a parent. And the last
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 6: thing I would suggest to parents, and there's a lot
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 6: more we could talk about, the last thing I'd suggest
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 6: is that while I would certainly underscore some of the
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 6: points we talked about earlier in terms of creating tech
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 6: free zones in your child's life, creating boundaries around social media,
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 6: delaying the use as long as possible, I also think
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 6: it's important to fill our child's lives with positive sources
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 6: of influence and positive experiences. Right. We want them to
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 6: experience fulfilling relationships. One of the ways they do that
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 6: is by actually seeing us enjoy our friendships as parents.
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 6: Our kids so often pay attention not to what we say,
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 6: but to what we do right, and when they see
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 6: their parents investing in relationships, having family over taking time
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 6: to be with friends, reaching out to friends who might
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 6: be struggling, because that's what we should do, show up
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 6: for one another. That sends an important message to the child.
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 6: Creating opportunities for kids to also spend time in person
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 6: with other kids is also vital.
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 2: With my own kids.
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 6: I'll tell you right now, we are putting as much
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 6: effort as we can into setting up play dates for
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 6: them with other kids so that they can have unstructured playtime.
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 6: So many kids, their lives are so overscheduled right there's
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 6: like no time to even get together because there are
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 6: at soccer practices, music rehearsals, concerts, games, that everything. And
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 6: there's nothing wrong with some of those activities, but we
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 6: need those opportunities for our kids to enjoy unstructured play
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 6: with other kids where they can be creative, they can
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 6: interact with each other without again technology, with just being themselves.
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 6: So these are a few things that our advice to parents.
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 6: But just remember as parents, look, you're not the only
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 6: one struggling. You're not the only one worried about these
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 6: issues around the mental health of your kids. The more
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 6: his parents we can start talking with each other about
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 6: the common struggle that we all have and protecting our kids,
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 6: the more we'll have support as well in our parenting journey.
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 2: Just to finish on that point, you'd recommend a parent
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 2: talking to their kid and saying, you know, hey, you know,
• 1:04:51
  Speaker 2: I want you to know that you can always come
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 2: to me kind of thing, right if you're feeling bullied
• 1:04:55
  Speaker 2: or you're or loan, so, you know, creating a channel
• 1:04:58
  Speaker 2: for them to be able to say space for them
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 2: to be able to come to you, right.
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I try to tell my kids every day. Yo,
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 1: you can tell me anything and everything and it's all good,
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean. It also goes with you know,
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 1: it also goes with other adults too, you know what
• 1:05:19
  Speaker 1: I mean. If your teacher says something to you, I'm
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 1: on your side, so tell me first. If you're in trouble,
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 1: I'm on your side, so tell me, and then we
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: can combat this together, you know what I mean. Like
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 1: it's all that just something that we're always trying to
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 1: tell our children, but secretly we still fear that same shit,
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 1: you know what I mean, the same thing.
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 2: But all you can do is do your best and
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 2: and and I don't want to speak to this. I
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 2: want the doctor to speak to it. But some sort
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 2: of initiating some sort of regular conversation right where where
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 2: they feel that they're loved and there's and there's always
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 2: a clear community and love from you to say if
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 2: something's coming up, if you're depressed, you know people get depressed,
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 2: come talk to me. If you're being bullied. I've been bullied,
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 2: come talk to me. Like, butther's just a really safe
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 2: zone for them to come to you.
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 6: Right, Yeah, No, that you're both articuling in it perfectly,
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 6: that's exactly right. They need to know that they can
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 6: come to us as parents and that they're not going
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 6: to get in trouble by being honest about something that
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 6: they're dealing with, their crisis that they're in. I'll share
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 6: one last tip for parents, which is that I think
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 6: also this is something my parents did for me when
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 6: I was growing up that I fully didn't appreciate the
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 6: value of until years later. We know that serving and
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 6: helping other people is a powerful antidote to loneliness. We
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 6: know it's actually really good for our mental health and
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 6: well being. And one of the things that my parents
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 6: used to do for me when I was a kid
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 6: is one whenever we had a family friend who was
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 6: in crisis. My parents would always step up to help,
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 6: right And it didn't mean like you know, it to
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 6: be in big ways. It could sometimes just be a
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 6: phone call to check on them, see how they're doing.
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 6: Sometimes it was visiting them to drop off food. Sometimes
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 6: it was you know, stopping in to watch their child
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 6: and babysit so they could have some time for themselves.
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 6: But it was in small ways. They sought to help
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 6: friends who were in crisis. And then as I got older,
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 6: my parents encouraged me to do the same. When they
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 6: would hear about a friend of mine who was having
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 6: a tough time, they'd say, well, what have you done?
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 6: You can you go and help them out? Like I
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 6: had a friend when I was in high school in
• 1:07:28
  Speaker 6: tenth grade.
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 2: I remember this.
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 6: There's a group of guys in our class who went
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 6: out for lunch and they were driving somewhere and something
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 6: happened when they were driving, they got into a car
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 6: accident and one of the kids died in that car accident,
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 6: And the kid sitting next to him was actually a
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 6: very good friend of mine who I had grown up with.
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 6: And my parents I still remember they said to me,
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 6: they said, have you checked on him to see how
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 6: he's doing. And I was like, oh, you know, I
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 6: don't think I really. I was like, you know, just
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 6: saw him in classes and that They're like, no, go
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 6: to his house, check on him, make sure he's okay.
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 6: And so I did. My sister and I went over.
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 6: We ended up spending like half a day with him.
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 6: We didn't talk about the accident at all. But I'll
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 6: tell you at the end of that day, when we
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 6: were leaving, he just turned to both of us and
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 6: he said, Hey, I really needed this. Thank you so much.
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 6: I've been hurting a lot, but it meant a lot
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 6: to have you guys over. And so, as parents, whenever
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 6: you have a chance to encourage your children to help
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 6: and support and be there for their friends who might
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 6: be having a hard time, I would encourage that because
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 6: sometimes you might think my kids struggling they need help.
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 6: Turns out, when we help other people, we ultimately help
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 6: and support and sustain ourselves as well.
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 2: And also I should mention you just made me realize.
• 1:08:46
  Speaker 2: You know, all of these bully kids that are being horrible,
• 1:08:49
  Speaker 2: they have parents, so so make sure that your kid's
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 2: not that kid, right, I mean, because I imagine some
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 2: of these children that are being just utterly awful on
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 2: social media need to hear from their parents that that
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 2: that this could lead to someone's suicide. I mean that
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 2: the words have such impact on people.
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 6: That's right, And a lot of those bullies, I'll be honest,
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 6: have some deeper issue that they're dealing with themselves that
• 1:09:19
  Speaker 6: someone's got to help them with, you know. And you
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 6: know that old saying hurt people hurt people. There's a
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 6: lot of a lot of truth to that. So look,
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 6: the bottom line is we're in this We're in this
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 6: vicious cycle now where pain has been getting more pain.
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 6: There are a lot of people who are hurt that
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 6: they're you know, potentially hurting themselves further, or they're down
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 6: on themselves, or sometimes in some cases they may be
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 6: bullying or hurting other people around them, and that that
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 6: just continues to multiply. We need to turn that vicious
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 6: cycle into a virtuous cycle, which is what we can
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 6: do when we actually start helping one another, reaching out
• 1:09:53
  Speaker 6: to one another in positive ways, like I'll tell you
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 6: that friend of ours, like when I was growing up,
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 6: who I was in that terrible accident, Like I suspect
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 6: that when we spend time with him, and he felt,
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 6: you know, a bit better that day. Maybe he was
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 6: nicer to someone else in his life. Maybe he was
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 6: kinder to his sisters and his parents. We don't know
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 6: the ripples that are created when we reach out to
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 6: somebody in a moment of kindness and when we seek
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 6: to serve people who are hurting.
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 1: I really do like that, though, that's not that's that
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 1: isn't a way that I have ever thought about combating
• 1:10:26
  Speaker 1: against my own depressions or my own loneliness and to
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 1: help someone else out. Absolutely, that is. Oh, that's so
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 1: because you're you're not only helping them out, you're helping yourself.
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 1: That's such a great it's a great instinct.
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 2: Like when you're feeling down, when you're feeling I've done
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 2: this before at the direction I probably of my therapist,
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 2: but it worked. Like, and you're down, think of someone
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 2: in your life who could use a pep talk or
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 2: cheering up or checking in with yeah, and then and
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 2: then just do it. FaceTime them, call them, hey, I've
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 2: been thinking about you and giving them the love you get.
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 6: It back in yourself. That says so true. And you know,
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 6: the last few weeks I've been I've been traveling to
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 6: different colleges actually talking about these the very subjects you
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 6: and I are all talking about. But it's a part
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 6: of what we call our We Are Made to Connect
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 6: College Campus Tour and it's been a fascinating journey. But
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 6: you know, college students are suffering with some of the
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 6: highest rates of loneliness and they're sort of at the
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 6: epicenter of the youth mental health crisis. But one of
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 6: the things that we do with the college students in
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 6: addition to talking about loneliness, talking about strategies to rebuild connection,
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 6: is we've actually posed this challenge to them called our
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 6: five for five Challenge, where we ask them to engage
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 6: in five acts of connection over the next five days.
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 6: And this could be either an expression of gratitude, an
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 6: extension of support to someone who needs help, or could
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 6: be asking for help themselves. And it's a really powerful challenge.
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 6: And we actually do the first data challenge with them
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 6: like in the room, and we asked them all to
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 6: think about somebody in fact, what if you guys want
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 6: to do this.
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 2: It takes it at a seconds. We can do this together.
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 2: We want to do it, and we want the audience
• 1:12:15
  Speaker 2: to play along.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, So everyone listening right right now, What I
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 6: want you to do is it just just sort of
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 6: close your eyes for a second, and I want you
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 6: to think about somebody in your life that you're grateful for.
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 6: To be somebody who helped you out a few days
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 6: ago when you were having a rough day. To be
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 6: somebody who showed up in your life a few years
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 6: ago when you had a major disappointment where things didn't
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 6: go quite your way and they helped to remind you
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 6: that things were going to be okay and that they
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 6: had your back. However big or small the action, Think
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 6: about who that person is, Think about what they did
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 6: for you, think about how it felt. And I want
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 6: you to actually to just if you're listening out here
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 6: and you've got a phone, I want you to pull
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 6: out your phone and I want you to compose a
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 6: text or an email to them right now. The key
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 6: is to do it in the moment so you don't
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 6: put it off, and just to take sixty seconds to
• 1:13:18
  Speaker 6: do this. But write them just a short note. It
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 6: could be one line, could be two lines, just telling
• 1:13:23
  Speaker 6: them that you were thinking about them, You remember this
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 6: beautiful thing they did for you, and how grateful you
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 6: are to them. So I'll just give you a few
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 6: seconds to do I'm doing it right now as you speak.
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 6: I live This is the first time I've live texted
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 6: on the podcast.
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 2: Awesome. Everyone pull over if you're driving, Please don't do
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 2: this while you're driving. Yes, I'm sure the Surgeon General
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 2: would not approve of that. A good call, Zach. I
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 2: appreciate that to take another And this is something that
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 2: is so easy that people can do. You know, it
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 2: takes two seconds to say to someone who's going through something, Hey,
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 2: you're on my mind. Hey sending in love. Hey, I'm
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 2: going to be in your neighborhood. Should I stop by?
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 2: We all have someone in our lives that could use
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 2: some love, and and and and we shouldn't be stingy
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 2: with our love. That is so true because our love
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 2: is a renewable resource. Yeah's infinitus, right, it's infinite. Uh.
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 6: And the more we give, actually, the more I realize
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 6: we have to give. But like, look, just even what
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 6: we did now right the way, when you did yours?
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 2: Did you who did you text? Was it Obama or Biden?
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 1: Which one?
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 2: On? The person? The person that I thought of actually
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 2: rockets me. If a fake I just wanted to say,
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 2: thinking of you, thinking of you, sending you love.
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 1: Gave me that job as a general.
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 2: I still have the suit.
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 1: I still love me, I appreciate you.
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 2: I still have the suit. And I got to meet
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 2: a fake doctors. I got to be a fake doctors.
• 1:14:57
  Speaker 2: Real Friends.
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 1: Is your favorite podcast right now?
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 6: That's so funny to the person that actually thought it
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 6: was my was my mother, because I was just on
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 6: a flight coming back and I just texted my my
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 6: parents and my sister. I was like, hey, I'll be
• 1:15:16
  Speaker 6: back in DC soon. I'm just getting on a flight.
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 6: And my mom like called me right away. I was
• 1:15:20
  Speaker 6: like sitting in my seat, you know, and she called
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 6: me and I was like, hey, everything okay. She was like, yeah,
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 6: I just saw that you would leaveing. I just wanted
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 6: to make sure that you're okay. See if you had eaten?
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 6: Are you going to be able to sleep on the plane?
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 6: And it was very endearing. This these are the same
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 6: conversations my mom would have with me, like years ago,
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 6: you know, when I was when I was traveling. But
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 6: but the just being reminded that it doesn't matter how
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 6: old I get, you know, whatever I'm do, my job
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 6: is whatever. My mom's love is constant, It's always there
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 6: for me. Like that just made me just feel so
• 1:15:49
  Speaker 6: good and so grateful, and so she was the one
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 6: I was thinking about. But I think, look, I think
• 1:15:54
  Speaker 6: that this in these kind of small actions that can
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 6: send powerful ripples out. You know, when we do this
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 6: exercise in college campus is we actually have the students
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 6: turn the flashlight on their phone after they send their
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 6: email or their text, and then hold it up toward
• 1:16:11
  Speaker 6: the ceiling and we dim the lights, and then we
• 1:16:13
  Speaker 6: have them look around and what they see are hundreds
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 6: of points of lights shining out like into the air,
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 6: and those each of those are rays of hope. Right,
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 6: somebody's going to receive one of those messages and feel
• 1:16:25
  Speaker 6: better about themselves. They're going to be reminded that they're
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 6: not alone, that somebody actually is thinking about them, that
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 6: they remember them. Maybe they're having a really down day,
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 6: and they'll think, oh, you know, maybe I do have
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 6: something of value to give to the world. This person
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 6: just remembered something I did for them. You know, those
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 6: rays of light are incredibly powerful. And the reason I'll
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 6: ask you say that these are so important is because
• 1:16:47
  Speaker 6: we've been talking about a lot of stuff today that
• 1:16:49
  Speaker 6: require policy solutions, programmatic solutions. But I think this deeper
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 6: despair that we're seeing in our country, I think is
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 6: part of a deeper underlying moral crisis that we're in,
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 6: where in some ways I feel like we have lost
• 1:17:04
  Speaker 6: sight of what we need to do and who we
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 6: need to be to enable all of us to thrive.
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 6: Like people say to me all the time, if they
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 6: you know, it feels like it's become more important to
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 6: be right than to be kind, more important to be
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 6: powerful than to be compassionate, and more important to look
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 6: out for myself than to look out for other people.
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 6: But I actually think, deep down inside, like all of us,
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 6: I think in our hearts, we want our kids to
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 6: grow up in a world where people are actually nice
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 6: to each other. We want people to be able to
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 6: look out for one another. We want somebody to be
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 6: able to lift us up when we fall down, and
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 6: we want to be able to do that for other people.
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 6: But I think right now we have drifted away from
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 6: some of those core values, and I think it's this
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 6: is our time to re anchor ourselves in those core
• 1:17:50
  Speaker 6: values and to ask ourselves what do we want to
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 6: fundamentally guide and shape the world that we're going to
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 6: live in, that our kids are growing up in. And
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 6: how do we proactively take those values and not just
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 6: have them these things that sit in our heads or
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 6: on paper, but say, how do I apply the values
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 6: of kindness and generosity, of service and of friendship to
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 6: the interactions I have in my day to day life,
• 1:18:13
  Speaker 6: To the decisions I make about what issues I speak
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 6: up for, to the decisions I make about who I
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 6: choose to be my leaders, you know, in organizations or
• 1:18:21
  Speaker 6: in government? Like, how do I apply these values to
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 6: my life and to our life? And how do we
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 6: talk more openly about them? Because this is I think
• 1:18:29
  Speaker 6: one of the great prices that we paid in the
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 6: last few years, is I think something that we all want,
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 6: a certain set of core values we all hold. Dear,
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 6: I've just disintegrated and have faded into the background, and
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 6: we feels like we're fundamentally angry and self centered and
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 6: mean spirited. But I don't think that's our true identity.
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 6: And in our hearts we are optimistic, we are courageous,
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 6: we are kind, and this is our opportunity to reclaim
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 6: and rebuild that identity.
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 1: That note well, we will end the podcast that's a
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 1: mic drop.
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 2: Thank you so much for joining us and for sharing
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 2: what you do with our audience. And it's an honor
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 2: to have had you and we really appreciate it. Thank
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 2: you for all the good you're doing in the world.
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 6: Thank you both. And I so enjoyed this. And I
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 6: will say, having spent a lot of time when I
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 6: was in residency training watching both of you on screen
• 1:19:25
  Speaker 6: in scrubs, it's a joy, certainly to meet you guys.
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 6: But I'll say, just in a real personal note, you
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 6: brought a lot of joy and laughter to many of
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 6: us who are going through medical training in those years.
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 6: I wouldn't underestimate how important that was. We needed to laugh,
• 1:19:39
  Speaker 6: We needed to be able to see the light side
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 6: of life after going through incredibly painful, difficult days, dealing
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 6: with life and death every day.
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 2: So thank you for everything. Was there one of us
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 2: who you thought was funnier than the other when you
• 1:19:50
  Speaker 2: were meeting.
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 1: He related with me. We're both brown bro.
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 2: Okay, sorry, of course, all right, thank you Thank you
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 2: forake so much. Thanks so much, guys, great to be
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 2: with you.
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 1: Appreciate your appreciate you. Let's take a break.
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 2: We'll be right back after these fine words. That was
• 1:20:17
  Speaker 2: so awesome.
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 1: That was awesome, man, Holy col but fake came with it.
• 1:20:23
  Speaker 2: He's such a wonderful speaker on these on these topics,
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 2: and he's in such a position to make a huge difference.
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, he's actually like going around speaking at a bunch
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 3: of colleges right now about the loneliness epidemic. So I
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 3: know we have a lot of college kids who listen
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 3: to us. If Veke is coming to your school, go
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 3: check them out.
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 1: Like that shit is real man, like we are all.
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 1: We all experience it in some way. He's going to
• 1:20:48
  Speaker 1: give you tools. I hope we've given you tools in
• 1:20:51
  Speaker 1: this podcast. Just you listening right now, We've given you
• 1:20:54
  Speaker 1: tools to fight loneliness. And you know, I'm going to
• 1:20:58
  Speaker 1: use some of the tools that were given this actually
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 1: the reaching out to people when I feel when I feel.
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 2: You could reach out to me more because you don't ever.
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 1: Well you I've reached out to my wife first and
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 1: next will be you.
• 1:21:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but I mean, you know we're not in the
• 1:21:14
  Speaker 2: same city. You could occasionally be like I could write
• 1:21:17
  Speaker 2: the text for you.
• 1:21:17
  Speaker 1: I shit you a meme. You could write the text
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 1: for me.
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 2: If I if I if I send you some texts,
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 2: will you just copy and paste on Yeah, hey man,
• 1:21:29
  Speaker 2: hey man, just checking in. I know you're in New
• 1:21:31
  Speaker 2: York City. Just want to say I love you and
• 1:21:33
  Speaker 2: you're on my mind. Okay, hit me up if you
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 2: want to chat, I'll write that. I'll just text you
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 2: and then you can just context. Yeah, and then like
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 2: once a week, just copy and paste because you never
• 1:21:49
  Speaker 2: reach out. All you send me fucking memes. That's your
• 1:21:51
  Speaker 2: love language.
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 1: That is my love language, because I know you'll appreciate.
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 1: You appreciate I knowing.
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 2: I so know when Donald's up baked in his house
• 1:21:58
  Speaker 2: because all of a sudden, I'll get like a.
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 1: Ro so stupid funny as hell.
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 2: No, of course it's funny. I'm just like I can
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 2: tell by the level of how stonery the meme is, Like,
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 2: what's going on at your house over there?
• 1:22:10
  Speaker 1: Motherfucker? I sent that one. The Jimmy Fallon shit with
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 1: them singing we are the Champion and they put Usher
• 1:22:16
  Speaker 1: in the corner and Usher thinks he's in the middle
• 1:22:19
  Speaker 1: square like so you know, Jimmy Fallon does the Brady
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 1: Bunch thing and they all sing on his show. Okay,
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 1: so Jimmy Fallon does a thing where it's like the
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 1: Brady Bunch and they sing different songs, right, So they
• 1:22:33
  Speaker 1: he had one and they're all singing we are to
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 1: Champion the Queens song we are the champ right, and
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 1: it's a bunch of freaking like a list musicians singing.
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 1: Somebody told Usher he was in the center square, but
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 1: he was really in the corner. So this motherfucker's looking
• 1:22:52
  Speaker 1: around everything around him, down to the left, to the right,
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 1: and up, and really he has only somebody up into
• 1:23:01
  Speaker 1: the left of his ass. I said, do that shit.
• 1:23:06
  Speaker 1: I was so fucking baked when I said you that shit,
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 1: cause I laughed so too. It took me a second
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 1: to realize, wait a second, what am I looking at here?
• 1:23:13
  Speaker 1: What is it? And then I read the caption and
• 1:23:16
  Speaker 1: the capture said somebody to Usher he was in listener square.
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 2: Listen, you don't ever check in, You don't ever check in.
• 1:23:21
  Speaker 2: I'm going to send you the text I want to
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 2: receive once in a while from you.
• 1:23:24
  Speaker 1: I send you freaking gold.
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 2: That was a great episode, and audience, if you're feeling
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 2: that was a little bit of a melancholic one, Have
• 1:23:32
  Speaker 2: I got news for you? Next week, Living Legend. It's
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 2: the guest we've wanted for a long ass time. Alicia Silverstone.
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 1: You know, I just recently watched Clueless really with your kids.
• 1:23:47
  Speaker 1: I walked into the living room and my wife and
• 1:23:49
  Speaker 1: daughter were watching Clueless.
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 2: That's funny.
• 1:23:52
  Speaker 1: It was not funny. I started crying. No, it's still one.
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 1: It still holds up by far, it still holds up
• 1:24:01
  Speaker 1: like it's.
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 2: You're crying from nostalgia.
• 1:24:04
  Speaker 4: No.
• 1:24:04
  Speaker 1: Britney came on on shone. Yeah, and that shit wrecked
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 1: me and I couldn't. At first, I didn't know why.
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 1: And it was like, oh my god, her glow and
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 1: her her uh spirit, Oh my gosh. And we wound
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 1: up doing a couple of movies together. But I started crying.
• 1:24:24
  Speaker 1: I couldn't and I didn't understand why. And that was why.
• 1:24:27
  Speaker 1: One because I was in a classic. Two because she
• 1:24:31
  Speaker 1: was I got to experience it with her, and I
• 1:24:34
  Speaker 1: thought she was really special.
• 1:24:35
  Speaker 2: Did Wilder like the movie?
• 1:24:37
  Speaker 1: I don't think she gets it, you know what I'm saying.
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 2: It's above her head still.
• 1:24:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:24:41
  Speaker 2: Uh.
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 1: When the movie came out, it was above Casey. You know,
• 1:24:45
  Speaker 1: Casey was still young. You know what I'm saying. And
• 1:24:47
  Speaker 1: so like a lot of the jokes from the movie
• 1:24:49
  Speaker 1: went over her head. So she watches it now she's like,
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 1: I didn't get that back then.
• 1:24:53
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm so happy we having Alicia on because she's
• 1:24:58
  Speaker 2: just really funny and and uh, that has a lot
• 1:25:01
  Speaker 2: of fun, interesting stories to tell, and it's something we
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 2: wanted to coordinate for a while and we finally did it.
• 1:25:05
  Speaker 2: So I'm stoked about it.
• 1:25:07
  Speaker 1: What's crazy is that I'm not the one that got
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 1: her on the show.
• 1:25:12
  Speaker 2: Of course. You know what happened was she reached out
• 1:25:15
  Speaker 2: to me because when we talked about her that time,
• 1:25:19
  Speaker 2: someone must have told her, and she left me a
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 2: voice note saying I heard you guys were talking about
• 1:25:25
  Speaker 2: me on your podcast, and I just you. I just
• 1:25:27
  Speaker 2: went right into it. I was like, yeah, we were,
• 1:25:29
  Speaker 2: Will you please come on. Obviously Donald has a connection
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 2: to you because of the movie, and I have a
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 2: connection to you because my crush. But also you were
• 1:25:36
  Speaker 2: in my movie, and so she said, yes.
• 1:25:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I could see why you had a crush on her.
• 1:25:42
  Speaker 2: Holy cow, I think a lot of straight Man and
• 1:25:45
  Speaker 2: I watched.
• 1:25:46
  Speaker 1: I watched I think I just think persons in general.
• 1:25:52
  Speaker 1: I watched that movie and I was like, holy.
• 1:25:56
  Speaker 2: That was But I also I just love I love
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 2: fun any silly women and that characters was so funny
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 2: and silly.
• 1:26:04
  Speaker 1: And uh, she's gonna be on the podcast and we're
• 1:26:07
  Speaker 1: gonna talk.
• 1:26:08
  Speaker 2: About There we go.
• 1:26:09
  Speaker 1: We're talking about fire O Smith. We're gonna talk about
• 1:26:12
  Speaker 1: freaking I'm gonna have to rewatch the video. I'm gonna
• 1:26:15
  Speaker 1: have to watch the videos too. Let's go down. You
• 1:26:17
  Speaker 1: know what we should do. We should do a rewatch.
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 1: Hopefully the strike will be over by then, but we
• 1:26:21
  Speaker 1: should rewatch some of her greatest hits.
• 1:26:24
  Speaker 2: We're allowed to talk about Aerosmith videos.
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 1: Okay, we'll talk about that. I want to talk about that.
• 1:26:30
  Speaker 2: I don't think. I don't think. I don't think Fran
• 1:26:31
  Speaker 2: Dresher controls, uh the Aerosmith videos.
• 1:26:34
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Motherfuckers was not dressing up for Halloween. Bro,
• 1:26:38
  Speaker 1: motherfuckers was not dressing up for.
• 1:26:42
  Speaker 2: I don't think anyone listened to that stupid rule. Although
• 1:26:45
  Speaker 2: I'm surprised.
• 1:26:46
  Speaker 1: I don't know, Bro, I don't know my guy. A
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 1: lot of people you.
• 1:26:51
  Speaker 2: Guy, my guy, are you my guys?
• 1:26:54
  Speaker 3: It's mixed, it's mixed, I think, most notably Megan Fox
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 3: dressed as a character from a movie. And then she
• 1:27:02
  Speaker 3: added sag and.
• 1:27:06
  Speaker 2: That was a weird She's like me, I guess she's
• 1:27:10
  Speaker 2: poking the bear.
• 1:27:11
  Speaker 1: She's come at me something about it because I said
• 1:27:15
  Speaker 1: my guy.
• 1:27:16
  Speaker 2: I just wondered, because I haven't seen a well are you.
• 1:27:17
  Speaker 2: Are you the kind of guy who says my guy?
• 1:27:19
  Speaker 1: Now? No, I just use it to be funny, okay,
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 1: because I.
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 2: Just need to adjust if you're going to be on
• 1:27:24
  Speaker 2: my guy, say.
• 1:27:25
  Speaker 1: I'm not going to be. Every time I hear that
• 1:27:28
  Speaker 1: ship that shit makes me laugh. Like certain people can
• 1:27:31
  Speaker 1: get away with like, oh my gosh.
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 2: Certain people can kind of get away with it. But
• 1:27:34
  Speaker 2: I don't really like it. I don't think you should
• 1:27:36
  Speaker 2: be on my guy, sayer.
• 1:27:37
  Speaker 1: Who can get away with saying my guy other than me?
• 1:27:40
  Speaker 1: Just now.
• 1:27:41
  Speaker 2: I think there's a certain type of funny person that
• 1:27:43
  Speaker 2: can get away with being like, come on my guy.
• 1:27:45
  Speaker 1: I don't want to work that way.
• 1:27:46
  Speaker 2: I don't want to Daniel guy weird, not much. I mean,
• 1:27:53
  Speaker 2: maybe Daniel might be my guy. Say, I think Daniel
• 1:27:56
  Speaker 2: is my guy. Honestly.
• 1:27:57
  Speaker 8: I do it when I'm doing like a New York impression.
• 1:27:59
  Speaker 2: If I'm talking to my friend or something.
• 1:28:00
  Speaker 1: I'll be like, my guy, what are you doing?
• 1:28:02
  Speaker 2: Oh that's not how I hear my guy these days.
• 1:28:05
  Speaker 1: My guy, my guy, the very Irish guy. Migay, magay.
• 1:28:11
  Speaker 2: Okay, what you're doing here, doll?
• 1:28:16
  Speaker 1: What are you doing here? My guy? What are you doing?
• 1:28:20
  Speaker 1: My gooy? What does everybody use that? That? Whatever anybody said,
• 1:28:25
  Speaker 1: we're gonna go Irish with it. Everybody goes, what are
• 1:28:28
  Speaker 1: you doing here?
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 2: That's in the name of the father, right, that's the
• 1:28:35
  Speaker 2: one that comes to me. What are you doing here?
• 1:28:38
  Speaker 1: Doll?
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 2: All right, we're gonna take a break. When we come back,
• 1:28:45
  Speaker 2: we're gonna talk. We're gonna do a T Mobile segment.
• 1:28:47
  Speaker 1: We read back.
• 1:28:55
  Speaker 2: This segment of Fake Doctor's Real Friends is brought to
• 1:28:58
  Speaker 2: you by T Mobile five G home in protecting you
• 1:29:00
  Speaker 2: from exploding bills with a price lock guarantee. Visit t
• 1:29:04
  Speaker 2: mobile dot com slash zach to check availability. All right,
• 1:29:08
  Speaker 2: got you?
• 1:29:08
  Speaker 3: Well, so you have a letter here from Charlie Young.
• 1:29:11
  Speaker 3: Charlie Wright says, Hi, my name is Charlie and I'm
• 1:29:13
  Speaker 3: eighteen from the landdown Under, hoping I could be the
• 1:29:16
  Speaker 3: youngest guest on the show, which I.
• 1:29:19
  Speaker 1: Think you might be on the running. Uh.
• 1:29:20
  Speaker 3: Just wanted to thank Zach, Donald, Daniel and Joel for
• 1:29:23
  Speaker 3: keeping my spirits high. I'm going through a really tough
• 1:29:25
  Speaker 3: breakup and a depression period and just started doing new job,
• 1:29:28
  Speaker 3: and without your podcast, I would be in a world
• 1:29:30
  Speaker 3: of constant confusion, pain and grief. I used to watch
• 1:29:33
  Speaker 3: Grubs with my ex. However, this podcast brings a whole
• 1:29:35
  Speaker 3: new set of memories I can create associated to the
• 1:29:37
  Speaker 3: incredible show. This has led me to be able to
• 1:29:39
  Speaker 3: eat again, sleep again, and have something to look forward
• 1:29:42
  Speaker 3: to each day. From Donald screaming to Zach's jokes and
• 1:29:45
  Speaker 3: perspectives on love.
• 1:29:45
  Speaker 2: In persone, Donald.
• 1:29:47
  Speaker 1: Screaming, I'm not even the funny guy on the podcast.
• 1:29:50
  Speaker 1: I'm just a loud guy. It sounds like, no, you're funny,
• 1:29:53
  Speaker 1: You're just also to scream.
• 1:29:55
  Speaker 2: Well, I think every listener at some point has had
• 1:29:58
  Speaker 2: to adjust their volume because of you. Go ahead, Joel.
• 1:30:01
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 1:30:02
  Speaker 3: Charlie also appreciates Daniel's calling voice and my infectious laugh.
• 1:30:05
  Speaker 3: So thank you for everything you guys do and for
• 1:30:07
  Speaker 3: allowing me to get back on track. His question comes
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 3: from season four, episode one. You guys might remember this
• 1:30:12
  Speaker 3: as the faith Dancing episode. This is where j D
• 1:30:15
  Speaker 3: is outside the hospital trying to get pumped up for
• 1:30:17
  Speaker 3: his day, and he listens to Faith by George Michael
• 1:30:20
  Speaker 3: and does the famous Gene dance right.
• 1:30:24
  Speaker 2: Jeans on if I could?
• 1:30:30
  Speaker 3: He says, the question is uh, scrubs basing current days?
• 1:30:33
  Speaker 3: What would j D and or Turk listen to before
• 1:30:37
  Speaker 3: they went into the hospital? And then he asked them suggestions?
• 1:30:39
  Speaker 3: But I'm going to leave those, Charlie, so we can hear.
• 1:30:41
  Speaker 2: I think Donald and I would both answer the same name.
• 1:30:43
  Speaker 2: Ready Donald? Three one two three?
• 1:30:49
  Speaker 3: A lot just happened.
• 1:30:50
  Speaker 1: Who I heard? Yeah, he said, you're walking into the house,
• 1:30:57
  Speaker 1: will be into the hospital. Be do do do do
• 1:31:00
  Speaker 1: Do Do Do Do Do do doo about me?
• 1:31:07
  Speaker 3: Three that's the song.
• 1:31:08
  Speaker 2: No, that's not what I would choose twenty twenty three.
• 1:31:11
  Speaker 1: Look, shit is tim Donald?
• 1:31:14
  Speaker 2: Donald admitted to me that he's now on the Oliver Dorigo.
• 1:31:18
  Speaker 1: Yes, welcome, listen. I like Olivia. She's good, but I'm gonna.
• 1:31:22
  Speaker 2: Be all American bitch. We'd be walking into all American bitch.
• 1:31:25
  Speaker 1: Good choice. Solid. I've been walking into first person shoot
• 1:31:28
  Speaker 1: a mode because the super Bowl?
• 1:31:32
  Speaker 2: Because the who's that? A little uzy?
• 1:31:34
  Speaker 1: No? J Cole and Drake Baby. I'm likely feeling J
• 1:31:39
  Speaker 1: Cole right now. Listen, I think right now, if you're
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 1: asking me, go ahead, the three best rappers ahead, in
• 1:31:47
  Speaker 1: no particular order.
• 1:31:49
  Speaker 2: This won't be controversial at all at all.
• 1:31:52
  Speaker 1: I think everybody's gonna agree J Cole. If you can't
• 1:31:56
  Speaker 1: say J Cole, I don't know what you do. I
• 1:31:58
  Speaker 1: don't know what you.
• 1:31:58
  Speaker 2: Jay Cole, Kendrick Lamar. Obviously it's pretty great, and you
• 1:32:06
  Speaker 2: gotta go.
• 1:32:06
  Speaker 1: Drake.
• 1:32:07
  Speaker 3: I think the era of women rappers that is a
• 1:32:09
  Speaker 3: wild thing to say that the.
• 1:32:11
  Speaker 1: Current era of women rappers, there's really Dojah.
• 1:32:18
  Speaker 3: For Megan, this greed.
• 1:32:20
  Speaker 1: Meghan is dope. Meghan is dope, but she don't be
• 1:32:22
  Speaker 1: spitting like Dojah spitting Megan Megan's albums. Listen to I
• 1:32:27
  Speaker 1: Love Megan, I love Meg THEA Stallion, I love the Stallion,
• 1:32:31
  Speaker 1: I love listen to me I love Megae Stallion and
• 1:32:34
  Speaker 1: I don't. And I'm not even talking about the way
• 1:32:36
  Speaker 1: she looks. I'm talking about how she rapped. She got
• 1:32:38
  Speaker 1: old school, she got a very old school flow, and
• 1:32:40
  Speaker 1: she's very very witty with her ship. Right now, if
• 1:32:44
  Speaker 1: you really want to ask me who the best rapper
• 1:32:46
  Speaker 1: is female, it gotta be Dojah b Joelle.
• 1:32:48
  Speaker 2: What's your answer the best female rapper currently?
• 1:32:54
  Speaker 1: I there's so many.
• 1:32:57
  Speaker 3: I mean I really like Megan, like she's really well,
• 1:33:00
  Speaker 3: you know. I think Doja is extremely talented, like Reco Nasty.
• 1:33:05
  Speaker 2: I was gonna say your tongue so Nasty was on
• 1:33:14
  Speaker 2: my tip of my tongue, I know. And for male
• 1:33:19
  Speaker 2: lil UZI I don't even know who that is. I
• 1:33:21
  Speaker 2: just heard the name. Do you like little Zy? Isn't
• 1:33:25
  Speaker 2: that a rapper?
• 1:33:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 1:33:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, lot? But Daniel, who's your favorite male and female
• 1:33:32
  Speaker 2: rappers currently?
• 1:33:32
  Speaker 8: You're in DJ Goodness? I mean, Rico Nasty is really
• 1:33:36
  Speaker 8: high up there. I love her a lot. I think
• 1:33:39
  Speaker 8: Kendrick is really up there. I'm a big West Side
• 1:33:41
  Speaker 8: Gun fan personally.
• 1:33:42
  Speaker 1: I think is it a little floozyvert like little Evil?
• 1:33:45
  Speaker 1: Isn't he trying to say little Evil? Is that who's
• 1:33:48
  Speaker 1: the one with the cross on his head and all
• 1:33:49
  Speaker 1: that ship? That little boozy birt No, that's twenty one savage, No,
• 1:33:53
  Speaker 1: not twenty he's the diamond. Yeah he has a diamond.
• 1:33:57
  Speaker 1: Isn't he trying to say little Evil? Some ship like that?
• 1:34:02
  Speaker 1: That sounds like conspiracy.
• 1:34:04
  Speaker 2: What about the guy six by nine who was in jail.
• 1:34:07
  Speaker 1: He's six by nine.
• 1:34:12
  Speaker 8: I get to measure like, I think he could be
• 1:34:16
  Speaker 8: left out of the conversation.
• 1:34:17
  Speaker 1: Because motherfucker gonna run up on you, Zach.
• 1:34:19
  Speaker 2: No, I didn't say anything negative. I'm asking you guy's opinion.
• 1:34:22
  Speaker 2: I don't want to do. You could say all the
• 1:34:23
  Speaker 2: negative things about him. Frankly, I don't want to run
• 1:34:26
  Speaker 2: six by nine. His name is Daniel not He's not
• 1:34:29
  Speaker 2: going to run up on me.
• 1:34:30
  Speaker 1: That's fine.
• 1:34:30
  Speaker 2: He is somebody.
• 1:34:30
  Speaker 8: Bodyguards are under to protect him from everybody else who
• 1:34:33
  Speaker 8: wants to run up on Yeah, so I'm not worried
• 1:34:35
  Speaker 8: about it.
• 1:34:36
  Speaker 1: Hip hop is in a state of no Like. One
• 1:34:39
  Speaker 1: of the best lines is in first person shoot a
• 1:34:41
  Speaker 1: mode and he says, what happened to all the bars?
• 1:34:45
  Speaker 1: It seems like everybody's on a jail, somebody's everybody's in
• 1:34:48
  Speaker 1: a jail escape some shit like that. But it's real
• 1:34:50
  Speaker 1: talking because nobody be spitting at all, no more, they
• 1:34:54
  Speaker 1: just be talking.
• 1:34:56
  Speaker 2: I am. I wanted to go back to our letter writer, Yes,
• 1:35:00
  Speaker 2: I wanted a letter writer mentioned that he was going
• 1:35:02
  Speaker 2: through a breakup, and I want him to know that
• 1:35:06
  Speaker 2: this too shall pass, that he will no feeling is forever,
• 1:35:11
  Speaker 2: and as much as he's feeling like shit right now,
• 1:35:14
  Speaker 2: he will come out the other side and rise like
• 1:35:17
  Speaker 2: a phoenix as a better man. But anyway, things will
• 1:35:23
  Speaker 2: always get better, I promise you. And I saw this
• 1:35:26
  Speaker 2: meme on Instagram and I sent it to my nephew
• 1:35:29
  Speaker 2: because he's, you know, out there in the dating world.
• 1:35:31
  Speaker 2: And I do think it's the best. And I sent
• 1:35:33
  Speaker 2: it to Amanda too, and she said, Charity posted it
• 1:35:35
  Speaker 2: on your stories. But this is it, says the best
• 1:35:39
  Speaker 2: piece of dating advice I've ever received is this. If
• 1:35:43
  Speaker 2: they like you, you'll know. If they don't, you'll be confused. Honestly,
• 1:35:51
  Speaker 2: it's all you need to know.
• 1:35:54
  Speaker 1: Like that's real talk.
• 1:35:57
  Speaker 2: I think.
• 1:35:59
  Speaker 1: If I'm confused, us, I know you don't.
• 1:36:01
  Speaker 2: Like me, right Listen, everyone's struggling with how to figure
• 1:36:04
  Speaker 2: it out. Why didn't he text back? Why did you
• 1:36:06
  Speaker 2: the dots? Why did he goes on? If they like you,
• 1:36:09
  Speaker 2: you'll know if you're confused, they don't, Mike Drop truly, Mmmm,
• 1:36:18
  Speaker 2: I don't have my sound effects machine, so I'm gonna
• 1:36:19
  Speaker 2: add one. Just I'm gonna do one, and just you know, improvise. Mm,
• 1:36:25
  Speaker 2: maybe you could give us one.
• 1:36:26
  Speaker 1: Maybe you could give them forever. Maybe you can T
• 1:36:29
  Speaker 1: Mobile forever.
• 1:36:31
  Speaker 2: Mmm mmm this this, this end of this podcast feels
• 1:36:36
  Speaker 2: like when you're on with a crush and like you
• 1:36:38
  Speaker 2: don't want to hang out. You know, you hang up
• 1:36:42
  Speaker 2: for you first, I don't want to stop talking to you.
• 1:36:45
  Speaker 2: Do you want to watch a show together? Why don't
• 1:36:48
  Speaker 2: we both start? When don't we both start a show
• 1:36:50
  Speaker 2: at the same time?
• 1:36:52
  Speaker 1: And then on three go go hit play when Harry
• 1:36:56
  Speaker 1: met Sally.
• 1:36:59
  Speaker 2: Thanks to Mobile. If you're over exploding internet bills, visit
• 1:37:02
  Speaker 2: T mobile dot com slash Zach and find out how
• 1:37:05
  Speaker 2: new and existing customers get T Mobiles price lock guarantee
• 1:37:08
  Speaker 2: for home internet.
• 1:37:11
  Speaker 1: For you.
• 1:37:16
  Speaker 2: I was gonna say he's gonna rise girthier. Okay, hear
• 1:37:19
  Speaker 2: the sirens.
• 1:37:19
  Speaker 1: I mean when you say girthier, what are you referring to.
• 1:37:23
  Speaker 2: His shaft and balls? Well, no, she's Luis and that's
• 1:37:30
  Speaker 2: our show. Everybody. Thank you for tuning in.
• 1:37:33
  Speaker 1: You guys, this was such a good show. I miss
• 1:37:35
  Speaker 1: you so much. What has it been two weeks since
• 1:37:37
  Speaker 1: we've seen each other?
• 1:37:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's been a minute. Alicia's Silverstone next week and
• 1:37:42
  Speaker 2: and Donald, I'll send you the text that I want
• 1:37:44
  Speaker 2: you to occasionally just copy and paste to me.
• 1:37:46
  Speaker 1: I will copy it and paste it to you right
• 1:37:48
  Speaker 1: away after you send it to me. I just want
• 1:37:50
  Speaker 1: you to know that and AUTII to thank you right now.
• 1:37:53
  Speaker 2: I do. I miss you, and I could use a
• 1:37:55
  Speaker 2: little text from you.
• 1:37:57
  Speaker 1: Okay, how's New York?
• 1:37:59
  Speaker 2: It's beautiful. So it's that I wanted to have that
• 1:38:02
  Speaker 2: fall vibes moment, and it's so that beautiful. There's this
• 1:38:06
  Speaker 2: every for those of you know Lower Manhattan. Every gift
• 1:38:09
  Speaker 2: season November December, they have this gift market in Union
• 1:38:14
  Speaker 2: Square Park and you kind of just kind of a
• 1:38:16
  Speaker 2: moment in the season, you know when you walk by
• 1:38:19
  Speaker 2: and you see them starting to put it up, that
• 1:38:21
  Speaker 2: oh here comes Christmas. It's like hearing the Mariah Carey song.
• 1:38:24
  Speaker 2: So today I walked by and they started building the
• 1:38:27
  Speaker 2: giant gift market and I was like, here we go.
• 1:38:29
  Speaker 1: Does Macon still do to windows?
• 1:38:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, but that's up in Harold Square.
• 1:38:33
  Speaker 1: I'm talking about are you going to add them to
• 1:38:34
  Speaker 1: Harold Square.
• 1:38:36
  Speaker 2: I don't usually go check out the Macy's windows. That's
• 1:38:39
  Speaker 2: not usually a thing I do. But I'll do it
• 1:38:41
  Speaker 2: if you want me to.
• 1:38:42
  Speaker 8: More of a Bergdorf Goodman kind of guy.
• 1:38:44
  Speaker 1: Listen. There's so many Macy's in California. I remember when
• 1:38:47
  Speaker 1: there was just one Macy's and it was on thirty
• 1:38:49
  Speaker 1: fourth Street, and I used to I don't.
• 1:38:51
  Speaker 2: Think you were alive when there was only one. My guy,
• 1:38:54
  Speaker 2: my guy, God, Oh my god, he's my guy.
• 1:38:57
  Speaker 6: Guy.
• 1:38:57
  Speaker 2: You are a my guy, guy, I'm my guy. When
• 1:38:59
  Speaker 2: you do you say my dude as well? Do you
• 1:39:01
  Speaker 2: say my say my dude, my dude, Daniel, or say
• 1:39:04
  Speaker 2: my dude? Do you yeah, I said my dude.
• 1:39:06
  Speaker 1: Oh my guy. Listen, listen to me, dude.
• 1:39:11
  Speaker 2: I just think my dude and my guy are so
• 1:39:13
  Speaker 2: lame in twenty twenty three, or my guy.
• 1:39:16
  Speaker 1: Listen to me. When I was a kid, macy And
• 1:39:20
  Speaker 1: on thirty fourth Street was the only Macy's in New
• 1:39:23
  Speaker 1: York City.
• 1:39:24
  Speaker 2: There's no way that's true.
• 1:39:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah it is.
• 1:39:28
  Speaker 2: There's another, maybe on the island of Manhattan. But in
• 1:39:31
  Speaker 2: the other five boroughs, I'm sure there's probably another maze.
• 1:39:33
  Speaker 1: There was no Macy's in Brooklyn, there was no Macy's
• 1:39:36
  Speaker 1: in Queens. There was no Macy's. You had to go
• 1:39:38
  Speaker 1: to thirty Fourth Street. That was it.
• 1:39:41
  Speaker 2: Okay, I don't know that there's other Macy's now.
• 1:39:44
  Speaker 1: There is there everywhere, and you go to the mall,
• 1:39:47
  Speaker 1: it's oh.
• 1:39:47
  Speaker 2: You're like a little store. Yeah, but not like a
• 1:39:49
  Speaker 2: full Macy's.
• 1:39:50
  Speaker 1: Not like the Macy's in New York. I watched Star
• 1:39:52
  Speaker 1: Wars in the Macy's in New York at Christmas. Why
• 1:39:55
  Speaker 1: Why Because it was on the television back in the
• 1:39:58
  Speaker 1: day nineteen eight five or some ship like that. They
• 1:40:02
  Speaker 1: fucking had the VHS and they put Star Wars at
• 1:40:05
  Speaker 1: the kids department while all the parents went and shopped.
• 1:40:09
  Speaker 2: And watched it from with all the other kids. I
• 1:40:12
  Speaker 2: picture you like the kid in the Christmas Story, except
• 1:40:15
  Speaker 2: instead of going down that slide with with Sanna, you
• 1:40:18
  Speaker 2: were just there watching Star Wars.
• 1:40:20
  Speaker 1: I bought my dad to macy so we could watch
• 1:40:22
  Speaker 1: Star Wars together. Really yeah, because he had seen the
• 1:40:25
  Speaker 1: Empire strikes back and return it to Jennibody a nye
• 1:40:28
  Speaker 1: of the tape because it wasn't out yet, it didn't exist.
• 1:40:32
  Speaker 2: Oh got it.
• 1:40:35
  Speaker 1: Also, we were broke. I had no VHS back in
• 1:40:38
  Speaker 1: the day.
• 1:40:41
  Speaker 5: All right, guys, stories we made about a bunch of
• 1:40:48
  Speaker 5: tops and nurses.
• 1:40:52
  Speaker 1: The stories.
• 1:40:58
  Speaker 4: Around here, other round you here hops, but we watch
• 1:41:02
  Speaker 4: Alwiz and
• 1:41:08
  Speaker 2: H