Latest / INSIGHT FOR LIVING: Biblical Wisdom For Everyday Living / Adolescents in Adult Bodies │ Msg 916 - Pastor Chuck Swindoll Insight for Living

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Adolescents in Adult Bodies │ Msg 916 - Pastor Chuck Swindoll Insight for Living · INSIGHT FOR LIVING: Biblical Wisdom For Everyday Living

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Speaker 1: An alleged victim of bullying and a young man, having
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Speaker 1: never recovered from the pain of his parents' divorce and
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Speaker 1: the isolation he experienced as an awkward adolescent, Timothy McVeigh
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Speaker 1: seemed vengefully bent on doing the world harm. I'll never
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Speaker 1: forget watching the live news footage of young McVeigh. He
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Speaker 1: was being led from his death row holding cell at
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Speaker 1: the Federal Penitentiary in Terre Haute, Indiana, to the place
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Speaker 1: where he would be executed for the April nineteenth, nineteen
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Speaker 1: ninety five truck bombing of the Alfred P. Merle Federal
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Speaker 1: Building in Oklahoma City. His eyes darted in a curious,
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Speaker 1: flashing fear mixed with an eerie, youthful defiance. After the
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Speaker 1: ordeal was over and the execute uhian had taken place,
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Speaker 1: the public learned of his final words. They included an
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Speaker 1: obscure poem titled Invictus, written by William Ernest Henley long
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Speaker 1: before mcveigh's birth. Henley's poem conveys a disturbing hardness within
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Speaker 1: this troubled young man's soul. As I read these now
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Speaker 1: infamous words, listen closely out of the night that covers
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Speaker 1: me black as the pit from pole to pole, I
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Speaker 1: thank whatever God's may be, for my unconquerable soul. In
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Speaker 1: the fell clutch of circumstance, I have not winced nor
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Speaker 1: cried aloud under the bludgeonings of chance. My head is bloody,
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Speaker 1: but unbowed beyond this place of wrath and tears loomed,
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Speaker 1: but the horror of the shade.
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Speaker 2: And yet the.
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Speaker 1: Menace of the years finds and shall find me unafraid.
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Speaker 1: It matters not how straight the gate are charged with
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Speaker 1: punishments the scroll. I am the master of my fate.
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Speaker 1: I am the captain of my soul. Left to ourselves,
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Speaker 1: my friend, that is our fate, living life as if
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Speaker 1: captains of our own souls. In today's message, I'd like
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Speaker 1: to share with you some important principles related to growing
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Speaker 1: up in God's family, Principles that demonstrate for all of
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Speaker 1: us the importance of facing the truth about ourselves and
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Speaker 1: about our relationship to the living God who made us.
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Speaker 1: To stay proud, arrogant, selfish, and petty while stubbornly believing
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Speaker 1: we can direct our own spiritual destinies is to remain
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Speaker 1: stuck in spiritual adolescens and though as spiritually immature adults.
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Speaker 1: We may never inflict such harm on innocent people as
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Speaker 1: McVeigh did. We can do untold spiritual damage to those
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Speaker 1: closest to us, and we can malign the name of
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Speaker 1: Christ as we do.
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Speaker 2: So.
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Speaker 1: I begin today by reading an excerpt from Acts, chapter twelve.
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Speaker 1: This will help set the stage for a wider view
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Speaker 1: of this panorama of scripture. The First Acts, Chapter twelve,
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Speaker 1: Verses twenty four and twenty five. The scene is first
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Speaker 1: century Jerusalem. Rome's Herod has just choked on his own
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Speaker 1: pride and drop dead under the swift and comprehensive judgment
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Speaker 1: of God. A holy hush has filled the city with
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Speaker 1: that in mind. Listen as I read Acts Chapter twelve,
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Speaker 1: twenty four and twenty five. Meanwhile, the word of God
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Speaker 1: continued to spread, and there were many new believers. When
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Speaker 1: Barnabas and Saul had finished their mission to Jerusalem, they returned,
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Speaker 1: taking John Mark with them.
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Speaker 2: The peter Pan syndrome is becoming increasingly more familiar to
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Speaker 2: all of us, and the familiarity is breeding contempt, especially
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Speaker 2: if you find yourself married to someone who was caught
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Speaker 2: in that particular syndrome. Perhaps you are not familiar with
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Speaker 2: the words the Peter Pan Syndrome, And for your sake,
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Speaker 2: I would like to read a few excerpts from the
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Speaker 2: man who originated the idea from a book by that name,
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Speaker 2: The Peter Pan Syndrome, with the subtitle men who Have
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Speaker 2: Never grown Up. He writes, we all remember the compelling
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Speaker 2: story of happy, go lucky Peter Pan, right, the soft,
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Speaker 2: effeminate boy who wouldn't grow up. It was Peter who
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Speaker 2: showed us the glory of eternal youth. Peter Pan symbolizes
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Speaker 2: the essence of youthfulness, the joy he awakens the child
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Speaker 2: inside all of us. We are drawn to him. He
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Speaker 2: is wonderful. He offers us the hand of an everlasting playmate.
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Speaker 2: But how many people realize that there is another side
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Speaker 2: to the classic character created by J. M. Barry? Have
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Speaker 2: you stopped to consider why Peter wanted to stay young? Sure,
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Speaker 2: it's tough to grow up, but Peter Pan avoided it vehemently?
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Speaker 2: What made him reject all things adult? What was he
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Speaker 2: really after was not Peter's desire to stay young, actually
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Speaker 2: a militant refusal to grow up. A careful and thoughtful
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Speaker 2: reading of Barry's original play says, this writer opened my
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Speaker 2: eyes to a chilling reality. As much as I wanted
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Speaker 2: to believe the contrary, Peter Pan was a very sad
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Speaker 2: young man. His life was filled with contradictions, conflicts, and confusion.
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Speaker 2: For all his gaiety, he was a deeply troubled boy
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Speaker 2: living in an even more troubling time. He was caught
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Speaker 2: in the abyss between the man he didn't want to
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Speaker 2: become and the boy he could no longer be. Unknown
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Speaker 2: to many parents and others who love them, many of
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Speaker 2: our children are unwittingly following in the footsteps of Peter
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Speaker 2: Pan with increasing frequency. The little known side of the
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Speaker 2: famous Pan has captured the heart and soul of a
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Speaker 2: significant segment of our children. Allow me a little bit
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Speaker 2: more in this quote. Like Peter's contemporaries, our male children
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Speaker 2: are suffering the most all across our land. Young men
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Speaker 2: are refusing to grow up. Thousands, maybe even hundreds of thousands,
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Speaker 2: are moving toward a manhood that frightens them. In a
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Speaker 2: state of fear, they rush to join the ranks of
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Speaker 2: the legion of the lost boys. Many so called successful
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Speaker 2: adult men still behave like children. Most of us have
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Speaker 2: flirted with this attitude at one time or another. It's
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Speaker 2: perfectly normal to sprinkle a little magical dust on your head,
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Speaker 2: especially during your younger days. There's certainly nothing wrong with
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Speaker 2: having the desire to join Peter and his frivolous fellows.
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Speaker 2: Nothing that is provided your return from never never Land
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Speaker 2: when it's time to deal with the real world. I
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Speaker 2: remember my own encounter with Peter and his magical dust.
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Speaker 2: I wasn't invisible to adults as Peter was, but I
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Speaker 2: did try to fly away once by jumping off the
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Speaker 2: chicken shed like my feathery friends. Nature gave me a
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Speaker 2: down to earth and painful lesson in reality. I also
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Speaker 2: told my grandma that I wasn't going to grow up.
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Speaker 2: She was kind and compassionate as she said, that's nice, Danny.
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Speaker 2: Now get out in the garden and hoe the tomatoes.
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Speaker 2: Reality neutralizes the powers of the magical dust. But if
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Speaker 2: children enter their adolescence in full pursuit of eternal youth,
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Speaker 2: monumental problems develop as reality becomes clouded, and if they
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Speaker 2: reach the beginning of their third decade with the same outlook,
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Speaker 2: a serious identity crisis will consume them. Sometime during their
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Speaker 2: early twenties. Some recover, an increasing number do not. Your
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Speaker 2: son might be a victim, so might your husband. I
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Speaker 2: am finishing the book The Peter Pan Syndrome, and I
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Speaker 2: am learning a lot. I don't agree with everything I read,
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Speaker 2: as is true of every book I read, but much
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Speaker 2: of what doctor Kylie writes is insightful. As a matter
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Speaker 2: of fact, it is amazing how it ties in with
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Speaker 2: our series on growing up becoming adult believers in the
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Speaker 2: Church of Jesus Christ. As I am reading through it,
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Speaker 2: I find myself on occasion smiling, on more occasions frowning,
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Speaker 2: and on all occasions thinking. It helps explain to me how,
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Speaker 2: at least in psychological terms, deeply troubled boys to borrow
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Speaker 2: from his words are caught in the abyss between the
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Speaker 2: man they don't want to become and the boy they
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Speaker 2: can no longer be. You know anyone like that, If
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Speaker 2: you are closely related to someone like that, you're probably
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Speaker 2: not smiling. It's very, very difficult to share your home
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Speaker 2: with an adolescent in adult skin, isn't it. It's even
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Speaker 2: more difficult to be married to one like that. I
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Speaker 2: wish I could say that Christians are immune from this syndrome.
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Speaker 2: On the contrary, in fact, in this particular message, we're
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Speaker 2: going to uncover from the New Testament. Three. In this syndrome,
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Speaker 2: one seem to pull out of it. Two seem not
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Speaker 2: to sort of studies and tragedy. But first, let me
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Speaker 2: share with you, as I think about the adolescent years,
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Speaker 2: some of the undeniable characteristics of adolescence. I say it
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Speaker 2: from experience as well as from the lives we're going
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Speaker 2: to be looking at in this particular study. Three in mind,
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Speaker 2: here's the first instability. When the going gets rough. It
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Speaker 2: is a mark of adolescence. When the going gets rough,
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Speaker 2: there is instability, There is restlessness, there is a great
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Speaker 2: desire to quit, and often there is the carrying out
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Speaker 2: of that desire just quitting instability when the going gets rough.
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Speaker 2: Nietzsche wrote about a long obedience in the same direction.
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Speaker 2: These particular adolescents have short bursts in different direction. They
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Speaker 2: know little of staying on course, especially when the course
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Speaker 2: is painful and hard to deal with. They don't make
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Speaker 2: good leaders, and they certainly don't make good fathers. But
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Speaker 2: alas you can't change your father, and you often can
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Speaker 2: rearrange the makeup of your leader, sometimes you simply must
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Speaker 2: learn to live with someone like this, and that's very,
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Speaker 2: very difficult. Second is irresponsibility when the world gets appealing.
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Speaker 2: Adolescence can usually handle a few of the battles with
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Speaker 2: the world system, but when there is an intensity of
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Speaker 2: appeal from the world, it is a characteristic of adolescence
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Speaker 2: to be irresponsible. Irresponsibility when the world gets appealing. The
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Speaker 2: third is familiar to all of us who have reared adolescence.
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Speaker 2: Insensitivity when the will is challenged. Who hasn't wrestled with
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Speaker 2: an adolescent who didn't get his way? Teachers could tell
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Speaker 2: us all kinds of stories about trying to teach adolescens
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Speaker 2: who want to do one thing when the game plan
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Speaker 2: is to do something else. Insensitivity when the will is challenged.
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Speaker 2: By that, I mean an inability to negotiate, an unwillingness
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Speaker 2: to listen to the other side. That's an adolescent characteristic,
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Speaker 2: in fact, an unwillingness to listen altogether. My mind is
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Speaker 2: made up. Don't confuse me with the facts. It's the
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Speaker 2: whole idea of I know what I want, and I
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Speaker 2: know when I want it, and I know how I
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Speaker 2: can get it. Don't get in my way. There is
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Speaker 2: an insensitivity when the will is challenged. All three of
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Speaker 2: these cases are set forth in scripture. We'll take them
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Speaker 2: in that order. First a case of instability, second a
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Speaker 2: case of irresponsibility, and finally a case of insensitivity. Turn
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Speaker 2: to Acts chapter twelve, if you will. The first case
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Speaker 2: study is a man named John Mark. You may be
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Speaker 2: surprised to know he's the same one who wrote the Gospel,
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Speaker 2: but that was much later on. At the time we
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Speaker 2: look at John Mark, he's an adolescent in an adult body.
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Speaker 2: John Mark is mentioned first in scripture in Acts chapter twelve.
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Speaker 2: He's known as the son of the woman in whose
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Speaker 2: home there was a great prayer meeting. According to verse
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Speaker 2: twelve of Acts twelve. That's not Germane to my subject,
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Speaker 2: So we'll drop down to the last two verses of
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Speaker 2: this chapter. Acts twelve, twenty four, and twenty five would
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Speaker 2: be our first stopping off place. Idealism is abounding in
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Speaker 2: John Mark's mind. The word of the Lord continued to
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Speaker 2: grow and to be multiplied, and Barnabas and Saul returned
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Speaker 2: from Jerusalem when they had fulfilled their mission, taking along
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Speaker 2: with them John, who was also called Mark. I wish
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Speaker 2: we had more in this biography of his age. I
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Speaker 2: wish we had more of his temperament. I certainly wish
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Speaker 2: we knew some of his battles and struggles in life.
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Speaker 2: It would probably help us feel more compassion. Certainly would
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Speaker 2: give us a broader understanding of the young man. Probably
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Speaker 2: he is in his early twenties. He is an adult
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Speaker 2: physically speaking, but as we're going to see really soon,
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Speaker 2: he is actually an adolescent. He's in the Peter Pan syndrome.
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Speaker 2: He has great hopes of traveling with these great men.
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Speaker 2: As is often true in missionary work, the first few
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Speaker 2: thoughts are idealistic. I will have a chance to minister
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Speaker 2: to a world in need. I will have an opportunity
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Speaker 2: to rub shoulders with great men and women. In the process.
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Speaker 2: I'll be able to travel. I'll be able to see
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Speaker 2: these sites that I would never otherwise see, and I'll
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Speaker 2: be able to touch lives that I would never otherwise
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Speaker 2: be able to touch. And in the case of John Mark,
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Speaker 2: he's going to be able to travel with Barnabas and Saul,
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Speaker 2: who was later named Paul the Great Apostle. Look at
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Speaker 2: the next chapter and feel the idealism grow. There were
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Speaker 2: at Antioch in the church that was their prophets and teachers.
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Speaker 2: They are named for us Verse two. While they were
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Speaker 2: ministering to the Lord and fasting. The Holy Spirit said,
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Speaker 2: set apart for me, Barnabas and Saul, for the work
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Speaker 2: to which I have called them. Then, when they had
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Speaker 2: fasted and prayed and laid their hands on them, they
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Speaker 2: sent them away, being sent out by the Holy Spirit.
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Speaker 2: They went down to Seleucia, and from there they sailed
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Speaker 2: to Cyprus. And by the way, let me jump ahead
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Speaker 2: and mention at the end of verse five they also
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Speaker 2: had John as their helper. Here's our friend John Mark.
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Speaker 2: So there are three of them that are traveling on
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Speaker 2: this ship, leaving and finally arriving. Leaving from the mainland,
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Speaker 2: they finally arrived on the island of Cyprus. It must
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Speaker 2: have been fabulous. According to verse five, they reached the
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Speaker 2: port of Salamis. If my study is correct, Salomus was
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Speaker 2: a beautiful port. In fact, what they've been able to
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Speaker 2: unearth through the archaeologist's spade, they have found that it
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Speaker 2: was probably a city of about one hundred thousand or
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Speaker 2: more people. It was a beautiful spot. The island of
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Speaker 2: Cyprus has been nicknamed Macaiah, the Happy Isle. I can
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Speaker 2: hear the sound coming across the harbor a low Ha
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Speaker 2: or whatever they said. When travelers arrived, it was a
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Speaker 2: place of freedom, a place of looseness, a place of
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Speaker 2: pleasure and delight. And I imagine the sunsets on Cyprus
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Speaker 2: were something to behold. And John's heart must have beat
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Speaker 2: quickly as he with his respected companions thought of ministering
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Speaker 2: to the people on Cyprus. They didn't stop and stay
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Speaker 2: at Salamus. It was only a passage to get them
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Speaker 2: onto Paythos, which is mentioned in the next verse. They
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Speaker 2: had gone through the whole island. As far as Paythos,
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Speaker 2: they found a certain magician, a Jewish false prophet whose
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Speaker 2: name was bar Jesus, son of Jesus. Interesting, and this
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Speaker 2: is John's first encounter with a confrontation, at least first
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Speaker 2: in scripture. And if you remember the story as Paul
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Speaker 2: and Sergius, Paulus, this proconsul, and this elimas the magician,
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Speaker 2: you remember it was an emotional encounter. It was tough
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Speaker 2: to witness. John must have stood there with his mouth
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Speaker 2: open as there was a verbal fight between Saul of
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Speaker 2: Tarsus and the magician. Verse nine. Saul, who was also
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Speaker 2: known as Paul, filled with the Holy Spirit, fixed his
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Speaker 2: gaze on this magician, and he said, you are full
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Speaker 2: of all deceit and fraud, you son of the devil,
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Speaker 2: you enemy of righteousness? Will you not cease to make
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Speaker 2: crooked the straight ways of the Lord. It must have
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Speaker 2: been something to behold. If you have ever been in
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Speaker 2: a confrontational setting, you don't need it explained. It's a
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Speaker 2: threatening feeling. It's disillusioning if you tend to be an
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Speaker 2: idealist to see two strong willed people verbally fight one another,
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Speaker 2: and Paul stands nose to nose with this emissary of Satan,
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Speaker 2: and John Mark must have stood back and gritted his teeth,
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Speaker 2: wondering what he had gotten into. The idealism begins to
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Speaker 2: shatter as Mark witnesses something other than a smooth flow
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Speaker 2: of events. The island must have been beautiful, but the
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Speaker 2: encounter was painful to witness. John saw it all the
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Speaker 2: proconsul believed verse twelve when he saw what had happened,
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Speaker 2: being amazed at the teaching of the Lord, and perhaps
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Speaker 2: that put things back into perspective. But then the next verse,
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Speaker 2: suddenly everything changes for John Mark. Now Paul and his
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Speaker 2: companions put out to see from Payphoss, and they came
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Speaker 2: to perga in Panphilia. John left them and returned to Jerusalem.
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Speaker 2: It's a half sentence, but it reveals an adolescent response.
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Speaker 2: Christistom writes that he was home sick for his mother,
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Speaker 2: so he went back to her. I don't know where
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Speaker 2: Chris system finds that. That's an interesting insight. He certainly
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Speaker 2: doesn't have biblical support for it. For whatever the reason,
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Speaker 2: John Mark said, that's enough. If you give me a
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Speaker 2: couple of more minutes, I think I can build a
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Speaker 2: case for why he bailed out. The Pamphillion coastline is
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Speaker 2: one of the most rugged in southern Turkey. It is
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Speaker 2: awesome to behold. One writer says, imposing cliffs stood like
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Speaker 2: huge fists of dark soil and foliage before me. If
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Speaker 2: Galatians four and verse thirteen refers to this moment in
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Speaker 2: Saul's life, Paul the apostle, this is where he contracted malaria.
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Speaker 2: This is where his eye trouble, his headaches began. This
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Speaker 2: is where he fell ill. And the ill illness, mixed
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Speaker 2: with the imposing mountainous range in front of him, and
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Speaker 2: the encounter with Satanic opposition, and perhaps a little homesickness
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Speaker 2: on John's part, was enough to send him back home
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Speaker 2: with his tail between his legs. He was now what
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Speaker 2: we would call today a missionary dropout. He decided it
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Speaker 2: isn't worth it to go on. I don't want to
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Speaker 2: be too hard on John Mark, but I do want
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Speaker 2: to point out that he quit when the going got rough.
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Speaker 2: Paul's headaches were horrible. One historian says the headache characteristic
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Speaker 2: of malaria was like a red hot bar thrust through
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Speaker 2: the forehead, like a dentist drill boring through a man's temple.
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Speaker 2: It became so difficult for Saul in his later years.
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Speaker 2: Paul the Apostle that he was not able to write
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Speaker 2: the Galatian Letter except in large, sprawling characters. It's believed
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Speaker 2: that he suffered from some form of ophthalmalia, and it
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Speaker 2: all had its roots in the Pamphilion coastline. And he
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Speaker 2: didn't even have Luke to treat him. So here they
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Speaker 2: were without medical assistance. Paul is laying aside in illness.
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Speaker 2: Barnabas doesn't have much to say. There's nothing but mountains
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Speaker 2: to climb in front of them. The memory of an
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Speaker 2: encounter with the demonic individual in recent days, John Mark
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Speaker 2: says that's enough in case you wonder what Paul thought
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Speaker 2: of this departure. Turned to chapter fifteen and look at
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Speaker 2: verse thirty six the same butk just sort of an
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Speaker 2: anecdote connected to this story. And then we'll go on
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Speaker 2: to the next man. They finished with the first journey.
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Speaker 2: John Mark has come home and they've gone on without him.
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Speaker 2: Paul and Barnabas. Now they're planning on another journey. Barnabas
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Speaker 2: wants to take his and John in fact one of
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Speaker 2: actually a relative verse thirty six. After some days, Paul
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Speaker 2: said to Barnabas, let's return and visit the brethren in
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Speaker 2: every city in which we proclaim the word of the Lord,
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Speaker 2: and see how they are. Barnabas was desiring of taking
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Speaker 2: John called Mark along with them. Also, Paul kept insisting
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Speaker 2: that they should not take him along, who had deserted
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Speaker 2: them in Pamphilia. Remember that word, we'll come across it
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Speaker 2: with another man in a moment. He had deserted them
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Speaker 2: in Pamphylia and had not gone with them to the work.
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Speaker 2: Paul said, no, we're not taking John Mark. He bails
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Speaker 2: out when the going gets rough. And there arose such
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Speaker 2: a sharp disagreement that they separated from one another Barnabas
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Speaker 2: took Mark and they sailed away to Cyprus. Paul chose
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Speaker 2: Silas and departed, being committed by the brethren to the
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Speaker 2: grace of the Lord. We'll look at John Mark as
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Speaker 2: Paul writes his last letter in a few moments. But
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Speaker 2: I want you to remember the first characteristic of an
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Speaker 2: adolescent in an adult body, and that's that whole problem
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Speaker 2: of quitting when the going gets rough. We're not just
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Speaker 2: doing a Bible study so we can study characters that
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Speaker 2: live in ancient days. We're looking at ourselves in the
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Speaker 2: mirror of scripture, aren't we. How do you do when
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Speaker 2: the going gets rough? How are you doing now that
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Speaker 2: it seems the bottom has dropped out? Your idealism about
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Speaker 2: life is shattered, Perhaps the life I refer to as marriage,
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Speaker 2: or the rearing of your children, or the living of
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Speaker 2: your days without a mate, or your job, whatever may
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Speaker 2: be your lot. Because you are in a world's system
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Speaker 2: that is marked by failure and sin and disappointment. You're
26:54
Speaker 2: come across rough times. Chances are good you've thought about quitting.
27:01
Speaker 2: A characteristic of adulthood in the Christian life is staying
27:05
Speaker 2: with the stuff when the going gets rough and I
27:09
Speaker 2: commend you for doing that. I commend you for staying
27:13
Speaker 2: with it, even though you haven't many models around you,
27:18
Speaker 2: it seems, who are doing that. Turn from Acts to
27:24
Speaker 2: Colossians chapter four, and let's look at a man who
27:29
Speaker 2: was irresponsible when the world became appealing. His name is Demus.
27:35
Speaker 2: He's mentioned three times in the scriptures. The first two times, well,
27:40
Speaker 2: it's rather commendable. Colossians four, verse fourteen simply mentions him
27:47
Speaker 2: alongside the beloved physician Luke. So we won't spend much
27:52
Speaker 2: time in Colossians four. Just have you noticed the mentioning
27:55
Speaker 2: of his name four fourteen Luke, the beloved physician ends
28:00
Speaker 2: you his greetings, and also Demus. It's the first time
28:05
Speaker 2: in the New Testament that Demus is mentioned. He's mentioned
28:09
Speaker 2: among the brethren who bring greetings from the apostle Paul.
28:14
Speaker 2: Colossians mentions him Philemon the little small letter in the
28:20
Speaker 2: New Testament, the one chapter letter. Let's turn there. You'll
28:24
Speaker 2: see him mentioned in verses twenty three and twenty four.
28:30
Speaker 2: Toward the end of that little letter Epiphras. Oh it's
28:36
Speaker 2: hard to find it, isn't it. Just before Hebrews verses
28:39
Speaker 2: twenty three and twenty four. If it has more than
28:41
Speaker 2: one chapter, you're not there yet. You've got to find
28:44
Speaker 2: the one chapter book. Philemon Epiphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ,
28:49
Speaker 2: Jesus greets you, as do Mark, Aristarchus, Demus, Luke, my
28:57
Speaker 2: fellow workers. The grace of the Lord ges Christ be
29:00
Speaker 2: with your spirit. He's mentioned not only as a companion,
29:04
Speaker 2: but a fellow worker. So Demus is a close companion
29:08
Speaker 2: with Paul and with Luke, and mentioned here Aristarchus and
29:13
Speaker 2: Mark men we know nothing about. And he's listed in
29:18
Speaker 2: a letter where Paul brings greetings from them. So he's
29:22
Speaker 2: one of the workmen, one of the ministers, one of
29:24
Speaker 2: the itinerant evangelists that were involved in first century ministry.
29:32
Speaker 2: And then the most famous of all references is in
29:35
Speaker 2: this last letter Paul wrote, two Timothy chapter four. Even
29:40
Speaker 2: though you go ahead in time, you go back in
29:42
Speaker 2: your bibles the Second Timothy four. And let's take verses
29:48
Speaker 2: nine through eleven of this last letter. Paul ever wrote,
29:56
Speaker 2: you can hear the clang of the chain and the
29:58
Speaker 2: dungeon Mamartine. Misery is all around Paul. He is pleading
30:04
Speaker 2: with Timothy to come soon. He's lonely. Make every effort.
30:09
Speaker 2: We're in chapter four, verse nine, Make every effort to
30:12
Speaker 2: come to me soon. For Demus, having loved this present world,
30:19
Speaker 2: has deserted me. I ask you to remember that word
30:22
Speaker 2: from an earlier reference. Here it is again, Demus has
30:26
Speaker 2: deserted me and gone to Thesalonaika. Crescence has gone to Galatia,
30:31
Speaker 2: tightest to Dalmatia. Only Luke is with me. Pick up Mark.
30:35
Speaker 2: This is the John Mark that Paul didn't want to
30:37
Speaker 2: be with earlier. He's come a long ways, hasn't it,
30:40
Speaker 2: And so has Mark. Pick up Mark and bring him
30:43
Speaker 2: with you, for he is useful to me, for service.
30:46
Speaker 2: I think that's very gracious of Paul to add that
30:50
Speaker 2: I see a value in John Mark that I didn't
30:52
Speaker 2: see earlier. Bring him with you. When you're in a dungeon,
30:55
Speaker 2: you're not too picky regarding companions. Bring them all. Bring
30:59
Speaker 2: the clone, bring the parchments, bring the books. Come before winter, Timothy,
31:04
Speaker 2: Come before winter. It's cold in this dungeon. Now back
31:09
Speaker 2: to Demus. Just a word about Demus here. He has
31:15
Speaker 2: loved the present world, and so he has deserted Paul.
31:23
Speaker 2: The word dessert is the Greek term for abandon to
31:27
Speaker 2: leave in the lurch, to let someone down. We're told
31:34
Speaker 2: why he was caught in the peter Pan syndrome. That's
31:38
Speaker 2: why in this passage it says he has fallen in
31:43
Speaker 2: love with the present world. I'man trigged by that. It's
31:50
Speaker 2: upon those thoughts that I think on occasion for a
31:53
Speaker 2: long time. I think about that thought when I drive,
31:59
Speaker 2: I think about that thought. When I lay down to
32:01
Speaker 2: go to sleep at night. I think about it when
32:04
Speaker 2: I get a call from a wife whose husband, for
32:08
Speaker 2: some unexplainable reason, has kicked the traces and taken off
32:13
Speaker 2: in a lifestyle that's altogether irresponsible. I think about a
32:18
Speaker 2: demus in today's life. Have done a little study on
32:24
Speaker 2: this word world. It's the term I own. I own
32:31
Speaker 2: is the Greek word it refers to. According to Trench,
32:36
Speaker 2: that floating mass of thoughts, opinions, maxims, speculations, and impulses
32:44
Speaker 2: at any time current in our world which constitutes a
32:48
Speaker 2: most real and effective power being the moral or immoral atmosphere,
32:55
Speaker 2: which at every moment of our lives we inhale and
32:59
Speaker 2: again inevitably exhale the subtle, informing spirit of the world
33:06
Speaker 2: of men who are living alienated and apart from God.
33:13
Speaker 2: At every moment of our lives, we are breathing in
33:16
Speaker 2: and exhaling our world system. We don't even realize how
33:24
Speaker 2: much I ran on Friday evening, and I shouldn't have.
33:29
Speaker 2: There was so much smog. I knew better, but I
33:32
Speaker 2: decided I needed to do that, and I took off
33:35
Speaker 2: and I ran four miles in the smug And when
33:38
Speaker 2: I got back, I had a real bad pain that's
33:43
Speaker 2: notorious for our area if you work out in the smog,
33:47
Speaker 2: or if you breathe it in and out too much,
33:49
Speaker 2: you know what I'm referring to. And all through that
33:53
Speaker 2: night I had the pain that was a part of
33:56
Speaker 2: my lungs filling up with that pollution that's around us.
34:02
Speaker 2: And I thought, it's amazing. You know it's there, you
34:05
Speaker 2: read that it's there, and sometimes you even see in
34:08
Speaker 2: taste that it's there. In fact, i've lived in it
34:12
Speaker 2: that I've gotten to where I don't trust air. I
34:15
Speaker 2: can't see when I travel outside to southern California. I
34:19
Speaker 2: have to get near exhausts at times just to feel
34:21
Speaker 2: at home and come back to reality. But I thought,
34:25
Speaker 2: what a perfect example of the world system. It's there.
34:30
Speaker 2: You don't realize it's there, but you are inexorably breathing
34:34
Speaker 2: it in and out, in and out, in and out,
34:37
Speaker 2: and it becomes a part of your thinking, so that
34:40
Speaker 2: little by little, like erosion, a section of your life
34:43
Speaker 2: can drop off. You're not even aware that it's dropped,
34:47
Speaker 2: because it's so silent and it's so subtle. But now
34:51
Speaker 2: you no longer are standing firm in that area. You know,
34:54
Speaker 2: I get soft in that area, and you get soft
34:58
Speaker 2: in the next area, very eloquently lockier rites of Demus
35:08
Speaker 2: before he met Paul, we can picture DMUs as an
35:10
Speaker 2: agreeable young man with no particular vice. The material of
35:15
Speaker 2: his character has no rent in it. He was only
35:17
Speaker 2: shoddy throughout. Under the strong influence of Paul's personality, Demus
35:23
Speaker 2: was like a piece of soft iron, temporarily magnetized by
35:28
Speaker 2: the presence of a magnet. Becoming a disciple, he was
35:32
Speaker 2: carried away by the enthusiasm of sacrifice. He wanted to
35:37
Speaker 2: live with Paul and die with him, and have a
35:40
Speaker 2: throne and a halo among the martyred saints. But when
35:44
Speaker 2: Demus came up to the great capital of the then
35:47
Speaker 2: known world, in company with the lord's prisoners Paul and Epiphrats.
35:52
Speaker 2: It was a different story. He was not a prisoner,
35:57
Speaker 2: and gradually the contrast between the and the outer world
36:02
Speaker 2: became intolerable to him. He saw the magnificent halls of
36:08
Speaker 2: the Caesars, the gorgeous homes of the rich, and the
36:13
Speaker 2: glitter of the world of music. Venal loves, jest and wine.
36:19
Speaker 2: Such a world cast its glamour over DMUs, and he
36:22
Speaker 2: yielded to its charms. The prison where his friends were
36:27
Speaker 2: languishing seemed wretched alongside the music haunted, scented, dazzling halls
36:33
Speaker 2: of Rome. Thus Paul had to write one of his
36:37
Speaker 2: most heartbreaking lines, Demus has forsaken me, having loved this
36:41
Speaker 2: present world. There is a pulsating beat that's very pleasurable
36:52
Speaker 2: in our world, and if you are an adolescent within,
36:58
Speaker 2: you want that beat. You want it's massaging melody. You
37:02
Speaker 2: want what it can give you, and it's for a
37:06
Speaker 2: period of time exceedingly pleasant. It really appeals to the flesh.
37:12
Speaker 2: It feels good, You long to drink of it. Your
37:21
Speaker 2: curiosity pulls you into it, and before you know it,
37:26
Speaker 2: you've deserted the things of God, I don't want to
37:31
Speaker 2: hurry on before asking you, does that describe what's happening
37:35
Speaker 2: in your life? I never know where these messages wind up.
37:41
Speaker 2: I never know whose lives they touch. I just this
37:46
Speaker 2: past week was with a young man who said I
37:50
Speaker 2: had walked away from Christ. I was at that moment
37:52
Speaker 2: living apart from him. I pulled in it a little
37:57
Speaker 2: Hamburger joint, and he named the town where he lived,
38:00
Speaker 2: and he said, I was working in another field entirely.
38:04
Speaker 2: And I switched on the radio and I listened to
38:07
Speaker 2: him your words, and he said, you just you just
38:12
Speaker 2: told me my life, one step after another. And I thought,
38:18
Speaker 2: sure you'd been looking in my windows, you had been
38:21
Speaker 2: reading my mail. He said, it was just right from
38:23
Speaker 2: the scriptures, and you described my life. Does demus describe
38:28
Speaker 2: your life? Maybe not completely. You may not have left yet,
38:33
Speaker 2: but you're playing with it. F. B. Meyer is right.
38:37
Speaker 2: No man suddenly becomes base. No one just suddenly drops off.
38:43
Speaker 2: It's a slow process. Demus walking away from the prison
38:47
Speaker 2: after visiting Paul might have looked across the streets of
38:50
Speaker 2: Rome and just for a moment entertained a very innocent thought,
38:54
Speaker 2: how wonderful that looks out there, how much better that
38:58
Speaker 2: looks than this is. And look at all the fun
39:01
Speaker 2: they're having, and listen to all the excitement of what
39:04
Speaker 2: they've got. And that's that prison is what I have
39:09
Speaker 2: in front of me. And enough visits and enough thoughts
39:12
Speaker 2: and enough toleration of thoughts like that, and you're a
39:15
Speaker 2: goner if you are teetering with those thoughts. Remember Demus,
39:26
Speaker 2: there was a time in his life when it was
39:27
Speaker 2: no longer just a theoretical thing. It became an action
39:32
Speaker 2: someone wrote years ago. So a thought reap an act,
39:35
Speaker 2: So an act reap a habit. So a habit reap
39:40
Speaker 2: your destiny. It begins with the thought, and it turns
39:44
Speaker 2: into a whole change of character destiny. The third visit
39:49
Speaker 2: we will have is with a man named in third John,
39:52
Speaker 2: again one of these little one chapter books. This is
39:55
Speaker 2: a man who wanted his way. The first man we
39:59
Speaker 2: looked at is has been John Mark, who walked away,
40:04
Speaker 2: The next was Demus, who loved the world, And third
40:08
Speaker 2: is Diotrophies, who wanted his way. We don't need to
40:14
Speaker 2: spend a lot of time here, because the Lord himself doesn't.
40:17
Speaker 2: When he writes of him, I wrote verse nine, I
40:20
Speaker 2: wrote something to the church. We're in the Book of
40:23
Speaker 2: third John. Verse nine. John says, I wrote something to
40:26
Speaker 2: the church. But Diotrophies, who loves to be first among them,
40:32
Speaker 2: does not accept what we say. Before we read the
40:37
Speaker 2: next statement, please observe that. John, the apostle writing this church,
40:44
Speaker 2: mentions Diotrophies almost in passing, and he characterizes him as
40:49
Speaker 2: a man who wants to be in first place. He
40:52
Speaker 2: wants to be in charge. He wants to have his way.
40:56
Speaker 2: He wants his opinions recognized and followed. He wants an
41:00
Speaker 2: influential role where he can make things happen. He doesn't
41:04
Speaker 2: want it to be done in the power of the
41:06
Speaker 2: spirit necessarily. He just wants his way. That's a mark
41:10
Speaker 2: of adolescence. I don't want it to be done necessarily
41:14
Speaker 2: in a wise manner. I just want what I want.
41:17
Speaker 2: I know what's best, and I'm going to get it.
41:20
Speaker 2: That's a Diotrophy's mentality. He wants first place. So the
41:26
Speaker 2: apostle says, he doesn't accept what we say for this reason.
41:32
Speaker 2: If I come, I will confront him. I will call
41:35
Speaker 2: attention to his deeds, which he does unjustly, accusing us
41:40
Speaker 2: with wicked words and not satisfied with this, neither does
41:45
Speaker 2: he himself receive the brethren. He, in fact, forbids those
41:50
Speaker 2: who desire to do so and puts them out of
41:53
Speaker 2: the church. This is what is commonly called a church boss.
41:58
Speaker 2: He isn't the appointed leader. He is the self appointed leader.
42:03
Speaker 2: He isn't the anointed leader. He's the self anointed leader.
42:08
Speaker 2: He wants his way, and he's going to get it
42:12
Speaker 2: at all costs. In some manner, he became involved in
42:17
Speaker 2: the leadership, and by and by he became like a
42:20
Speaker 2: savage diotrophies lives on, his spirit lives on. I was
42:31
Speaker 2: spending part of my past week with a group of
42:34
Speaker 2: pastors at a conference. I wasn't there very long, but
42:37
Speaker 2: I was there for about twenty four to thirty hours,
42:41
Speaker 2: and during my brief stay, I had a number of
42:44
Speaker 2: encounters with men in ministry, and though I don't know
42:47
Speaker 2: most of them personally, we had a chance to talk
42:51
Speaker 2: in depth about their work. And I can't tell you
42:56
Speaker 2: what percentage, but it had to be a high percentage.
42:58
Speaker 2: Of My conversation's really to dealing with difficult people in
43:02
Speaker 2: the church. What do I do, Chuck when I am
43:06
Speaker 2: faced with this particular individual. Then they described to me
43:09
Speaker 2: the scene. I'd finish with that situation, and then I'd
43:13
Speaker 2: have coffee with another couple or three of the fellas,
43:16
Speaker 2: and I, even though the geography changes and the people's
43:20
Speaker 2: names change, the same idea came again. I didn't ask
43:24
Speaker 2: for it. In fact, it's tough to minister in a
43:26
Speaker 2: context like that. You deal with two or three hundred
43:29
Speaker 2: depressed pastors, and then you come away from there thinking
43:32
Speaker 2: did I minister to those people?
43:34
Speaker 1: Or what?
43:35
Speaker 2: What concerned me is the growing number of difficulties men
43:41
Speaker 2: are encountering in leading churches. It need not be that way,
43:47
Speaker 2: and all church people aren't like that. In fact, the
43:51
Speaker 2: vast majority are not that way at all. But it
43:55
Speaker 2: doesn't take many. Takes just a few, and before long
44:01
Speaker 2: you feel like maybe God's leading me somewhere else. The
44:07
Speaker 2: only problem is there's a diotrophies waiting there that's just
44:12
Speaker 2: anxious to have you come. Now. I don't mean by
44:17
Speaker 2: this and every disagreeable person is a diotrophy. That's not
44:21
Speaker 2: my point, and I am not saying that. But I
44:25
Speaker 2: am saying it's easy if you are frequently negative, or
44:30
Speaker 2: if you are frequently with a bad attitude regarding the
44:34
Speaker 2: ministry of a church. It's easy to fall into a
44:36
Speaker 2: Diotrophy's syndrome. It's part of adolescence, just not wanting to
44:43
Speaker 2: grow up. I finished a book recently called Well Intentioned Dragons.
44:49
Speaker 2: Interesting book. It's written by Marshall Shelley. Well Intentioned Dragons
44:55
Speaker 2: is a book about difficulties people have in churches. He writes, dragons,
45:01
Speaker 2: of course, are fictional beasts, monstrous reptiles with lions claws, serpents,
45:07
Speaker 2: tailed bat wings, and scaly skin. They exist only in
45:11
Speaker 2: the imagination, but there are dragons of a different sort,
45:14
Speaker 2: decidedly real in most cases, though not always. They do
45:18
Speaker 2: not intend to be sinister. In fact, they're usually quite friendly,
45:22
Speaker 2: but their charm belies their power to destroy. Within the church,
45:27
Speaker 2: there are often sincere, well meaning saints, but they leave ulcers,
45:32
Speaker 2: strained relationships, and hard feelings in their wake. They don't
45:37
Speaker 2: consider themselves difficult people. They don't sit up mites thinking
45:41
Speaker 2: of ways to be nasty. Often they are pillars of
45:44
Speaker 2: the community, talented, strong personalities, deservingly respected, but for some
45:50
Speaker 2: reason they undermine the ministry of a church. They are
45:55
Speaker 2: not naturally rebellious or pathological. They are loyal church members
46:00
Speaker 2: convince their serving God, but they wind up doing more
46:04
Speaker 2: harm than good. They can drive pastors crazy or out
46:10
Speaker 2: of the church. Some dragons are openly critical. They are
46:14
Speaker 2: the ones who accuse you of being pick one, too spiritual,
46:18
Speaker 2: not spiritual enough, too dominant, too laid back, too narrow,
46:23
Speaker 2: too loose, too structured, too disorganized, or ulterior in your motives.
46:29
Speaker 2: These criticisms are painful because they are largely unanswerable. How
46:34
Speaker 2: can you defend yourself and maintain a spirit of peace?
46:37
Speaker 2: How can you possibly prove the purity of your motives?
46:40
Speaker 2: Dragons make it hard to disagree without being disagreeable. Are
46:45
Speaker 2: you a diotrophees? Are you a diotrophies in the making.
46:54
Speaker 2: It may be difficult for you to answer that question.
46:56
Speaker 2: You may not even be aware if of it, if
46:59
Speaker 2: it's true, because I think often we're well intentioned in
47:02
Speaker 2: our in our feelings. I am sure Diotrophies never set
47:07
Speaker 2: out in his mind to destroy a church, But somehow,
47:11
Speaker 2: in the process of time, Diotrophies took charge, so much
47:18
Speaker 2: so that when someone as gracious as the apostle, John wrote,
47:23
Speaker 2: he wouldn't even receive the letter. Another another example of
47:31
Speaker 2: an adolescent in adult body. Now, how do we guard
47:37
Speaker 2: against permanent adolescents? That's that's a that's a real practical question,
47:41
Speaker 2: and I don't think there's a reason to spend a
47:43
Speaker 2: lot of time on that. Let me suggest three things,
47:47
Speaker 2: and I want to go down the list of those
47:49
Speaker 2: three particular characteristics I mentioned at the beginning of my talk.
47:54
Speaker 2: First practical piece of advice I would give is this,
47:57
Speaker 2: when wrestling with restlessness, real the benefits of faithfulness. When
48:03
Speaker 2: wrestling with restlessness, as John Mark did, realize the benefits
48:10
Speaker 2: of faithfulness. People who make an impact on other people
48:18
Speaker 2: are not fly by nighters. They are people who stick
48:22
Speaker 2: through the tough times. The people in your life who
48:26
Speaker 2: have been most helpful in your growth have been people
48:30
Speaker 2: who have stayed at the task when the going got rough.
48:34
Speaker 2: When the going gets rough, instead of thinking where can
48:37
Speaker 2: I find greener pastures, think what are the benefits of faithfulness? Here?
48:44
Speaker 2: And while you're at it, read a good book called
48:47
Speaker 2: A long obedience in the same direction. Excellent book that
48:52
Speaker 2: is worth the time. A long obedience in the same direction. Now. Second,
48:58
Speaker 2: when allured by ear responsibility, think of the consequences of carnality.
49:04
Speaker 2: Now I'm thinking of Demus. When allured by irresponsibility, think
49:10
Speaker 2: of the consequences of carnality. That has helped me a
49:15
Speaker 2: lot when I have been tempted by the world. I
49:21
Speaker 2: have found that if I can visualize in my mind
49:25
Speaker 2: the incredible wake the consequences that will follow a sensual act,
49:34
Speaker 2: I am halted. I am stopped in my tracks from
49:39
Speaker 2: yielding picture the consequences of carnality when you're tempted, when
49:46
Speaker 2: you're allured by irresponsibility. I was talking with a Christian
49:52
Speaker 2: statesman several weeks ago, and he said, while on the
49:55
Speaker 2: mission field, he had to deal with a man who
49:58
Speaker 2: had decided to leave his mate and his children and
50:01
Speaker 2: to run away and have a fun and frolic time
50:05
Speaker 2: with a young lady he had met there from that
50:08
Speaker 2: particular region. And he said, I stopped him before he
50:13
Speaker 2: took off, and I said, wait a minute, let's talk
50:14
Speaker 2: for a few moments about the lives that are going
50:17
Speaker 2: to be impacted by your decision. And he said, before
50:20
Speaker 2: we got through, literally we named several hundred lives that
50:25
Speaker 2: will be impacted as a consequence of your act. That
50:30
Speaker 2: does something if you're still sane enough to reason with
50:35
Speaker 2: That does something to stop us in our downward spiral.
50:41
Speaker 2: Think of the consequences of your carnality before the act.
50:45
Speaker 2: If you don't, you'll think it'll be easier than it
50:48
Speaker 2: will be. Third, and finally, when tempted to manipulate and dominate,
50:53
Speaker 2: remember the lordship of Christ. The next time you are
51:00
Speaker 2: tempted to manipulate someone or dominate the situation, remember the
51:05
Speaker 2: Lordship of Christ. I have great news. Adolescence is not terminal.
51:14
Speaker 2: Isn't not a great piece of news. Adolescence is a
51:18
Speaker 2: passage through which we must travel. You can't get to
51:22
Speaker 2: adulthood without going through it. But the goal is to
51:27
Speaker 2: go through it, not to stop in it. To fight
51:32
Speaker 2: the syndrome called the peter Pan syndrome. I'll say more
51:37
Speaker 2: about that next time. We're not through dealing with this one.
51:41
Speaker 2: I'd like us to bow together for just a moment
51:44
Speaker 2: of personal evaluation. I want you to allow your life
51:50
Speaker 2: to pass in review in front of people who mean
51:52
Speaker 2: a lot to you, your family people, the members of
51:57
Speaker 2: your family, the people who look up to you and
52:00
Speaker 2: see you as representative of what they really believe in.
52:07
Speaker 2: I want you to think about them, and to see
52:09
Speaker 2: their faces there on the back of your eyelids as you,
52:13
Speaker 2: for a moment consider your life horizontally. That's the reason
52:21
Speaker 2: your life is important. You have people who look to you,
52:27
Speaker 2: who believe in you, who count on you not to
52:31
Speaker 2: give up when the going gets rough, not to be
52:34
Speaker 2: allured by the world system, not to manipulate them or
52:39
Speaker 2: dominate the scene. They need heroes, they need models, and
52:49
Speaker 2: Christ has left you to be that for them. For
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Speaker 2: some of you, as small children lean on you and
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Speaker 2: need you to be strong. For some of you, it's
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Speaker 2: a mate going through a very painful time not even
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Speaker 2: your mate can explain. For others, it's people where you work.
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Speaker 2: Whatever may God help you to be strong, stable, responsible.
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Speaker 1: Gracious Father, we simply do not want to leave a
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Speaker 1: time such as this, a place where you have so
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Speaker 1: clearly and pointedly spoken into our experience without acknowledging our
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Speaker 1: absolute total need for you in our lives to settle
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Speaker 1: once and for all this long fought battle for ownership
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Speaker 1: of everything we once claimed as our own, and to
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Speaker 1: surrender it all willingly and graciously to you to your
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Speaker 1: absolute sovereign control. Forgive us, our Father, for all those
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Speaker 1: times and places, and even the situations where we either
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Speaker 1: unknowingly or with great deliberation, manipulated circumstances or the minds
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Speaker 1: of other people to.
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Speaker 2: Make certain we got our way.
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Speaker 1: Please forgive us, help us today to repent fully and
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Speaker 1: genuinely of those sinful patterns and acts of pride and
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Speaker 1: wilfulness so blatantly and shamefully disregard you and feelings of others.
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Speaker 1: Our Father, help us grow up and out of those
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Speaker 1: adolescent ways, to become more like your son Jesus, who
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Speaker 1: came not to be ser but to serve and to
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Speaker 1: lay down his matchless life for sinners. Sinners like us,
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Speaker 1: undeserving and ungrateful sinners. Teach us to see ourselves rightly
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Speaker 1: before you and before those whom we serve and lead.
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Speaker 1: I pray for anyone and all who may have heard
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Speaker 1: these words today who is now recognizing that they have
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Speaker 1: become like John Mark, or like Demas, or like diotrophies.
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Speaker 1: Stop the syndrome. Father, assist them as they step off
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Speaker 1: that track and evaluate their lives in light of the truth.
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Speaker 1: I pray you would give them and us the discipline
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Speaker 1: the courage to do what is right, and then honor
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Speaker 1: and reward them in us for a decision made. We
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Speaker 1: do love you, dear Father. We thank you for Christ,
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Speaker 1: who loved us first, and we thank you for one another,
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Speaker 1: fellow members of the same family, who helped keep us
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Speaker 1: strong when we would otherwise run away, then fall, or
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Speaker 1: try to demand our own way. Thank you that they
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Speaker 1: are there to warn us, to drive us back to you.
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Speaker 1: Thank You for the Body of Christ. I pray and
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Speaker 1: ask for all this in the name of Jesus, our Lord,
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Speaker 1: the Head of the Church.
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Speaker 2: Amen.
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Speaker 3: The preceding message, Adolescence and Adult Bodies was copyrighted in
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Speaker 3: nineteen eighty five and the sound recording was copyrighted in
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Speaker 3: twenty sixteen by Charles R. Swindall, Inc. All rights are
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Speaker 3: reserved worldwide.