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5-MINUTE-FRIDAY: The Best Date That Never Happened · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Hey, Hurdler's Emily. Here.
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: You are listening to another installment of five Minute Friday
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: from Hurdle. For five Minute Friday, I share a story,
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: I offer you a thought prompt to take you into
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: the weekend, and then I give you a few highlights,
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: whether that's content picks, movies, podcasts, courses that I think
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: are pretty brad to finish things off. I am always
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: looking for your feedback and suggestions and tips. So if
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: you have something you're doing that's pretty cool, if you
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: have a friend that's doing something pretty cool, if you've
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: seen something that's pretty cool, I want to hear about it.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Reach out to me over on Instagram, DM at Hurdle
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: podcast or at Emily a Body, and of course I'm
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: all yours over email. It's Emily at Hurdle. Do us
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: so this week for five Minute Friday, I'm talking about
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: something I don't talk about a lot, which includes a
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: little bit of my personal life a teaser to get
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: you really excited about this episode, but it's not actually
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: about my personal life. So basically, here's the thing. Last Sunday,
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: I put on real clothes, which is always exciting, and
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: I went downtown to brunch with a friend of mine,
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: which is something I have not done in months. It
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: felt so nice to use the word brunch as a
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: part of my vocabulary.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: Went downtown in the Lower east Side.
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  Speaker 2: We met a friend of my friend as well, and
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: afterward we decided to go get a brunch cocktail appropriately,
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: so we went to have one drink around the corner,
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: and when we got there, we met these two guys
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: that were friends of my friend's friend. It's like a
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: whole kind of web here, And basically the moral to
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: this story. Why I'm telling you this is because one
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: of those guys asked my friend's friend for my number,
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: and then he asked me out, and so I said yes,
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: and we picked a day, and then he and I
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: rescheduled once and in the meantime before we actually went
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: out on said date, of course, we start to text
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: about the normal things that you start to text about
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: with someone that you're getting to know, and he asks me,
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: naturally what it is that I do for work, and
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: so I tell him and like I have received before.
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  Speaker 2: He says, wow, you're all over the internet, huh, And
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: I'm like, yep, And he jokes about wanting to listen
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: to the show before we go out. The morning comes
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: that we're supposed to link up, and he reaches out
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: to me and he says, I'm really sorry to do this,
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: but I've got to pull the pin on tonight. I'm
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: heading upstate with a friend and they wanted to leave
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: earlier than I. I'd love to reschedule, but I know
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: that if the shoe was on the other foot, I
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: probably wouldn't.
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry.
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: And it's interesting because, like, Okay, plans happen, and in
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: normal circumstances, I might just think like, okay, no big deal,
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: we'll figure something else out. But it was what he
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: said at the end, insinuating that I should not want
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: to reschedule and kind of telling me what my behavior
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: should be.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: That made me kind of wonder.
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: Of course, I wondered if he was actually going upstate,
• 3:28
  Speaker 2: but then I kind of internalized it, and I said
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: to myself, maybe he didn't really like.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: What he saw online.
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: And I tell you this story not because this guy
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: deserves all this airtime. In fact, I didn't respond to
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: the text. I don't know if we'll ever go out.
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: Whatever about that. I'm telling you this story because that interaction,
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: for just a second actually made me doubt my awesomeness,
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: and that's so fucked up. I'm gonna mark this episode explicit. Listen,
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: I'm a confident human and I'm proud of the things
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: that I've done. And I've worked really hard, not just
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: on coming into my own but also building this business
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: from the ground up. And I make big asks and
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: I'm okay with no because I look for the yeses.
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: And I've learned how to be my own hype woman.
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: I talk to other women about being their own hype woman.
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  Speaker 2: And I do all of these things because I hope
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  Speaker 2: that my work inspires other people to work hard to
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  Speaker 2: I do these things because I want to inspire others
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: to live a healthier, happier life, whatever that looks like
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: for them.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: I remember that I used to.
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: Feel like I had to kind of disclaim that I'm
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: a lot. I used to think, in terms of dating,
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: that maybe the right partner for me would be someone
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: that balanced me out, whatever that means, Like, perhaps I
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: needed to be with someone who was more of like
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: the strong and silent type, because that Goldilocks relationship would
• 5:04
  Speaker 2: help me real things in If this sounds familiar to you,
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: I'm going to be the first person to tell you
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: right now that you don't need anyone to reel you in.
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  Speaker 2: In fact, you're pretty fucking great as you are. And
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: while we're at it, if you happen to be wondering,
• 5:22
  Speaker 2: if you happen to be single and you're wondering, if
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: there is something wrong with you because you are not
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: in a relationship, there is nothing wrong with you. If
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: there are people in your life that make you feel
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: like you are too much, whether it is in a
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: friendship or a working relationship or a romantic relationship, then those.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: Probably aren't your people.
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: Listen, I definitely always always have work to do. But
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: I am telling you all of this because that I
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: just want to reiterate that yes, at times you may
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: be quote unquote too much for some people, but you
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: are not too much peer You are great as you are,
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: and the people that make you doubt this in your life,
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  Speaker 2: those aren't your people. And so, yeah, I didn't go
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: on a date last Wednesday, but you know what, it's
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: the best date I haven't had in a really long time.
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: That gave me exactly what I needed, this reminder that
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: I'm good just as I am. Prompt for you, what
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: is one personality trait that you love about yourself and
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: what is one trait that you would like to change again?
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: What is one personality trait you love about yourself and
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: what is one you'd like to change. Highlights of the week.
• 6:41
  Speaker 2: Links to all of this goodness can be found in
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: the show notes. First up, listen to Almost thirty Bearing
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: it All with the Birds Papaya. I had Lindsay Simsick,
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: she's the co host of Almost thirty with Crystal Williams
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: on the show last year, and I really really really
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: loved this episode feature during Sarah Nicole Landry, otherwise known
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: to her social media followers as at the Bird's Papaya.
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: I just I love everything she was talking about about
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: coming into her own later in life, saying that it's
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: never too late to do a self audit and asking
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: yourself questions like what is it that I want and
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: who is it that I want to be? Definitely definitely
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: give it to listen. Read this week Mindset by Carol S. Dweck, PhD.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Hurdle Book Club. This is a new
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: thing that happened on Monday.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: And by it happened, I mean I put it out
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: into social media and got some really great response, so
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: I am so amped to make this a thing again.
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: The book Mindset by Carol S. Dweck is the first pick.
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: I'm going to set up a zoom call for us
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: to chat about it, probably the first or second week
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: in September. The book is basically about the power of
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: mindset and how successes in so many areas of our
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: lives can be triggered by how we think about our
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: talents and abilities. Just really amped, especially because so many
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: past Hurdle guests have suggested that I check this out.
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: In the show notes, there is a link to a
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: Google form that you can sign up for the book club,
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: so I highly recommend let you join in. Next up,
• 8:18
  Speaker 2: check out the Honeyhouse. I've talked about my friend Nick
• 8:20
  Speaker 2: Dio on the show, and he is up to some
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: funny stuff, some good stuff out in Los Angeles with
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: his girlfriend Aaron, and a slew of other couples. They
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: are all posted up in a creator house, which is
• 8:32
  Speaker 2: definitely a term of twenty twenty if I've ever.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Heard one, and it's called the honeyhouse.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: Basically, they're making a ton of content, they're having a
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: good time and watching it unfold via TikTok and Instagram
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: is absolutely addictive. Last highlight of the week, A recommendation
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: for you if you want to get stronger, if you
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: want to learn all about kettlebals how to use them
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: on your own at home. I cannot recommend this enough.
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: It's bells Up Level one and course. It's a five
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: week breathing a body weight and bell's course for absolute beginners.
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: Lacy is without a doubt, one of the most knowledgeable
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: trainers I know, and she really really cares about providing
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: a quality service and good intel to her clients.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: She's the kettlebell Queen.
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: She is such a kind hearted, beautiful human and having
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: trained with her myself before, I promise.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: You you will be.
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: Put through the ringer, So definitely check that out as well.
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: And last little shout out this week. I recently launched
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: two new hurdle sessions that are now live on the
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: Hurdle Podcast event bright page. We've got Finding your Power
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: Alone and Handling Hurdle Moments. Finding your Power Alone all
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: about getting good doing things solo, getting good with being solo.
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: It's a topic that I have a lot of conversations
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: about in my DMS, and I know that it is
• 9:59
  Speaker 2: a workshop that is going to be really empowering for
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: so many of you. And lastly, as I mentioned handling
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: hurdle Moments, this is going to be the new token
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: hurdle session. It's one that you can only take live
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: and it's a deep dive an overcoming challenge and emerging
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: powerful and confident on the other side. I'm really excited
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: about both of these and if you have any questions
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: about either, I'm all ears again Emily at Hurdle US,
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: over email at Emily Body at Hurdle Podcast.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: Another hurdle conquered. Catch you guys next time.