Latest / The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast / Try Again | a conversation with author Saty Cornelius

Transcript

Try Again | a conversation with author Saty Cornelius · The Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast

• 0:18
  SPEAKER_04: Hi friends, welcome back to the Simply Wholehearted Podcast.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_04: I'm Amy Wicks, your host, as well as our good friend Ashley Pittman.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_04: If you are new here, we are so glad you joined us.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_04: Here at Simply Wholehearted, we are sharing our journey as we discover how to better love the Lord with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_04: We hope to inspire you by inviting our friends to share their stories and ideas of how they live unplugged, purposeful, and intentional in their everyday.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_04: Hey, have you heard Inner the Worship Circle's newest single, Still We Dream of Flying?
• 0:51
  SPEAKER_04: Their music is what you hear in the background, so be sure and check out their latest releases at inertheworshipcircle.com and all the socials.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_04: Well, I can't believe we are already looking at the last few days of April.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_04: It has been a crazy spring.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_04: I know.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_04: We all keep talking about it, right?
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_04: But already I see summer coming around the corner.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_04: My kids are doing their countdown to the last day of school already.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_04: And I have also gotten to just finish speaking to mom's groups around the city.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_04: I have talked to many of you, and I know that you all desire a pace that works not only for your needs, but also your personality and how you want your summer to look.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_04: So if you want to hear Ashley and I talk about some ideas that we're trying this year, stay tuned towards the end of our conversation for some ways to get your summer as meaningful as you would like.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_04: Well, you guys, this week I've been having a personal enneagram number crisis.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_04: You know I've been training to be a coach in Beth McCord's program, so I've been reading a lot of extra books for her recommendations, along with my other books, right?
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_04: So anyway, I was suddenly unsure if I had actually typed myself correctly.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_04: So I started digging into some of the basics of the Enneagram once again.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_04: I think one of the most powerful tools that I have found with the Enneagram is that it actually originally was an oral tradition, which is why a lot of the online tests or trying to type others does not work well.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_04: So I think having a good friend or a coach, right, to ask helpful questions to determine your type, or maybe even listening to like our episodes number 37 and 38 with Beth, because they can be really helpful as you discover the basics of the Enneagram and you take a good long look at all the types so you can figure out better what really resonates with you.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_04: So be sure and check out all that Beth McCord offers at youreneagrampoach.com and find a discount code for her introductory programs in the show notes.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_04: Today's conversation with Sadie Cornelius is heartwarming and encouraging.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_04: She is so sweet and full of hope and encouragement.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_04: We love getting to hear her journey leading to her first book, which happens to release May 1st.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_04: That's just a few books away.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_04: Yay! Way to go, Sadie.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_04: Her book, More to Me, is a story about hope, building trust, and finding worth.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_04: If you hadn't caught on already, we at Simply Wholehearted believe in the power of story, whether it's real or fictional, and how it can help us on our journey to live inspired.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_04: We hope you'll enjoy our conversation as you make your way to the next destination, or maybe make some of your mundane a little bit more entertaining.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, exactly, exactly.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_04: So I want to know a little bit, okay.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_04: So I mean we've communicated through email and things like that, but there's a lot I don't know about you.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_04: Um I mean, I can read bios.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_04: I can read bios, of course.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_04: But we want to hear it because it's so much better to hear.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_04: This is why I listen to podcasts, this is why I do podcasts, and my blogging skills are not um stellar.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_03: They're totally stellar.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_03: What do you mean?
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_04: No, I need help in that department.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_05: You're an excellent speaker though.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, thank you.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_05: You are a good speaker.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_04: So, okay, so tell us a little bit about you.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_04: I I I there's a lot of history we're gonna share and we're gonna ask about, but give us a little update on your current life status and all the good stuff.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_04: I see mountains in your background right there, by the way.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_01: Just gonna say.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that was a gift that my husband and I got for our wedding.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_01: So it has a verse on it from Ecclesiastes, the two shall become one.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_04: So fun, it's beautiful.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_04: I love it.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so your husband, you're married.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_01: I am married.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we got married August 20th, 2018.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_01: So it's been or I mean, I'm sorry, 2017.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_01: It was like a minimum.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah and a half.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_04: Oh fun.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_04: That's my son's birthday, August 20th.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_01: Really?
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_04: It had a good day.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_04: It is a good day.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_04: He was born in 2010.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_04: So okay.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_04: He's gonna be eight this year.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_04: Well, sorry when they grow up because my baby flies as an adult.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: I'm like, oh my goodness.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, it does.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody was saying, you know, it's like a preteen.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_01: They're all like, oh, you'll just wait.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it's so true.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, when you're younger, you're just waiting for the next thing.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_05: Like, when can I get my learner's permit?
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_05: And then I can drive, and then I can vote, or whatever.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_05: And then so it's always some and then when you grow up, there's no more next things.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_05: And so it just flies.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: Mm-hmm.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_01: It does, for sure.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, I am married.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_01: Um, we live in Oregon, so that's hence the mountains.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_01: Um very outdoorsy.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_01: So um that's where we are right now.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_01: Um, a little bit of history though, about me.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_01: Um I was an only ch an only girl in a family of four kids.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_01: So um I had a lot of uh brothers and yes, you did.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_01: By the time I was about six or seven, I was ready for a little playmate that would play dolls with me.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't blame you.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: Um yeah, I was tired of all the cars and all the the crazy guy stuff.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: So um I had asked my parents almost every night for a sister, and um yeah, I just was really ready for it.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I think there was other reasons for sure.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_01: Um when my parents did decide to look into fostering and adopting, but okay.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_04: Um Yeah, because I mean most people would say, you know, I've got my hands full, three boys and a girl, that's good.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, that's a lot.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_04: I I would grew up as the oldest of four kids and it was reverse.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_04: Uh three girls and one boy, and I know he often said the same thing.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: Give me a brother.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_01: I know, and I've I've known other families where you know it's that same way, and the one child that's on their own, they're always like, Can you please?
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_01: So it doesn't always happen like that, but I was fortunate enough.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, no, my son, he does the same.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_04: He's got two older sisters, and he's always like, I want to share a room with someone, give me, give me a boy.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_04: Poor guy.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, like sorry, can't just do that.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, it doesn't just happen, but yeah.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_01: So um I was very fortunate and blessed to be able to have a um sister we looked into adopting, and my parents um were actually just planning on, I say plan lightly too, because it's not always our plan, it's not plan, but um the original plan was to just look for one girl um for a sister, and there was an opportunity to take in two girls.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_01: They were half sisters.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: Oh wow.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and so yeah, they um they ended up coming and living with us and we adopted them and they are amazing.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_01: So um they're younger than me.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_01: I'm the second oldest, but I have one older brother and then they're um a little bit younger than me.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, they are um my two sisters, and um at the time they were three and five, I think.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_04: So they were older kind of yeah, they had a plenty of history of their own that they're bringing into they were for sure, yeah.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_01: They had um they actually both spoke Spanish and English, I think a little bit English, but they both spoke Spanish, and um, it was cool to just bring in another culture and um to just share life with them.
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_01: And I was just I was in heaven, I'm sure I think all of us were.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_01: We were just like stoked to be able to have new family members, and yeah, um they just kind of melded into our family so perfectly, and um yeah, it just happened that way and it was beautiful.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_01: Um so yeah, that's kind of the younger childhood story, and then and you ended up adopting being able to adopt them and they're we did, yeah.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_01: So that one was like we uh my parents I say we because I'm used to like my family.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, that makes sense.
• 8:48
  unknown: Yeah.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_04: My parents, um well, it's a whole family decision.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_01: It's not just you know, when you have kids, it's the whole family process for you know it is, and my parents are always really good to keep our like the biological children before anything even happened in the loop of everything.
• 9:05
  SPEAKER_01: And even today they still ask um because they still foster now, so they still keep our um the kids in involved, and um, if there's a big decision, they'll have like a family meeting and we'll all just kind of talk about it and pray about it.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_01: And um, so yeah, it was it was definitely a family matter there.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_01: So I that's where the we comes from.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_01: But no, it's great.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_01: Um yeah, so um they were at that time they were fostering to adopt, so that's okay kind of how that works is you can either foster to adopt or you can just foster to you know reunite with the family, the biological family.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_01: And so that time we were down in California at that time and they they were fostering to adopt.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: So that was the goal.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_01: The end goal is to adopt okay.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_01: So wow.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_01: Um but yeah, that was that was back then and it feels like ages ago, but yeah, excuse me.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_04: But yeah, um now it would be weird to have two I mean w how many did you say they ended up coming through your home?
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_04: So you have these two adopted sisters, but you know, what's some of those numbers?
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_04: Because they're I mean, that's not everyone's story.
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_04: It's incredible.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_01: For sure it's not.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, for me it was normal.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but because it's growing up, I yeah, like talking to people, it's it's not that normal.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_01: So um yeah, so they they I would say I don't know an exact number, but I definitely dozens.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_01: Um they have come through their home.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_01: So a lot of them are just short term, you know.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_01: Um I don't know if you're familiar with the term respite, yeah.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_01: It's a short term, so like another foster family's going out of state or something, and so they they take them for the weekend or something like that.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: But um sometimes it'll be a couple weeks and they realize, oh hey, biological dad is getting his act together.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_01: We can, you know, you're good now, and they'll go home and we still keep in touch um to some of them.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: And so yeah, dozens at least, and um they like I said, they still foster, so I still get to meet.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_01: It's funny because I think has that been then, like 20 years that they've um well, since the first two sisters, so they were five, um it's probably been like 15 or so years.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's awesome.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_01: Just over, yeah, and there was a gap in there too, so they weren't fostering um for about seven years in there, okay, right after the girls.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_01: Um and then that makes sense to get them acclimated and yeah, all that to involve there.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_01: And there was a move in there out of state, so it was kind of a lot of tr transitions there.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah, because then you have to get re-certified and that's a whole process.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_04: We I I've been blessed to have several friends who have, you know, been foster parents and adopted and you know, all the different things to just watch their journey.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_04: It's incredible because it's it's near and dear to my heart, and that's why I was excited um to have your story on.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_04: We don't have a ton of fiction, um just because you know, but I I always like the backstory and then fostering and adopting is close to my heart, and it's something that has I've always thought, oh, I'm supposed to do this in my family and personally, and I don't know if that's the case anymore.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_04: I'm still very, you know, the desire is still there.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_04: So I've got to figure, well, I figure that the Lord is gonna do something with that, whether I get to champion or somehow financially or you know, just involved in some measure because um I I believe it's the father's heart, it's what he did for us, is he adopted us.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_01: So of course I know that's definitely something that I've learned over the years is just how that um that correlates with the whole gospel story is how you know Jesus came and sacrificed so much so that we could be his children and adopted us, you know.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_01: Um so there's so many different correlations that I can I bet.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_04: How about for you emotionally?
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_04: Because as a mom of three kids, uh, you know, we have talked about it with them different things because that's a lot of their friends, you know, yeah are either going through um they've seen them, you know, uh add a foster kid to their family or adopt.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_04: And so we talk about it and you know, they've in their um innocence are like, yes, let's do that, you know, go get us a couple of siblings, we'll take them.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_04: And I love it, it's so beautiful.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_04: But so tell us, I mean, how was it for you?
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_04: Obviously, we're excited to get two sisters, but there's a lot to that.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, it's just not adding more kids to your family.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_01: There is.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_01: Um, yeah, so it there were definitely some ups and downs.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, like I said, it was fun to have sisters.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but there are also those things, and we were young at the time, those that first group, I'll get into a second part of the adoption story, but um that first go-around, it was like it they fit so well into our family that it was it was easy as a sibling, I think.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_01: Not not the fact that you know it was just that simple that, oh, hey, now you're my sister, but um, there was definitely a growing process where we we figured out how each other works and learned how to share and all this kind of stuff that you don't really like.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, as a parent, I'm sure you think about those things, but as a sibling, you don't like oh well that means I have to share my stuff and I have to share my room and all those things.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_01: So it it was it was definitely exciting, but there it was a growing process for me too to be able to um just be a little bit more selfless and um because they were younger, you know, be the example for them and um have them kind of look up to me in some ways.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_01: I you know it there's a a responsibility to that too as a as an older sibling of foster kids and adopting.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, you kind of have to step up to that challenge.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_04: I think sometimes adding to our family would be the best thing for especially our youngest, because you know, like the youngest is always the youngest, no matter how you try not to.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, for sure.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_04: That's good.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_04: I love that you can see that now.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_01: Definitely, yeah.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_04: So tell me a little bit about the adoption, how that went, and then obviously, you know, some more of the then the maybe like the second phase where a lot of foster kids were coming through your home.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so um the first go-around, it was um, it was just me and my brothers, and we, you know, we had I think it was a three-bedroom house down in California.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_01: It was Southern California, so it was like I was born there and lived there for a while.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, it is.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, all the houses are super tiny if you're like, you know, family home kind of thing.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: Um it was a three-bedroom house, and I had one room, and the boys had the other room, and um the two girls moved in with us, and um I had to share a room with two other girls.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_01: So it was a small room.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_01: There were three girls in one and three boys in the other.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_01: And it was a little bit wild, but um it was great.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_01: It was it was so nice to be able to have a big family and you know, um just have playmates and stuff.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_01: And um yeah, we we I don't learn I don't know Spanish anymore, but I remember um that's right since they spoke Spanish, we were able to my mom put us all in like Spanish and you know, had us all do it together.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_01: And um, for a while they kept it and we kept we we tried.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it's a little bit harder for yeah, it's it's harder to come into it when you're like maybe English ultimately makes us dumber or something where and that's why those who speak English have a harder time.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_04: English makes us dumb.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_04: Well languages, I don't know.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_04: I feel like people in other countries know so many languages, including English.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_04: But for us Americans in particular, we don't have to simulating we don't have to.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_05: We get to not get spoiled.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_05: Yes.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_05: Well the new ones.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_01: For sure.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and I mean, yeah, I've heard people say that Spanish is so much easier to learn than English, but to when you start out with English, you're like, Yeah, I don't even know where to start.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_01: I've tried even as an adult, and it's great.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: So hard.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_01: I admire people that can speak more than one language, that's for sure.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_01: Me too.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_04: So with them, um, even though they so they were in the foster to adopt, you know, kind of uh system in particular that stream, which is a little bit more certain that you're gonna adopt them.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_04: Was it a pretty easy adoption or was there was it long and drawn out?
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_04: Because there's all of those, you know, especially no matter where they are at with the system.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_04: Um you know, it can go both ways.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_04: Or was it always like guaranteed and there wasn't any emotional back and forth?
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_04: Are we gonna lose them?
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_01: Um, you know what, with that one, um, since I was so young, I don't remember there being a lot of um, you know, up and down, up and down.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_01: There definitely was with the second set of, you know, the adoption that I'll go into.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_01: Um but uh yeah, so there wasn't much of the the emotional up and down, just like, oh, are we gonna lose them?
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_01: Are we gonna keep them?
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_01: Are we gonna you know, that's definitely a real thing, and that happened later on.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_01: Um but with the first the two sisters, they um it was definitely a foster to adopt program that we were in down there in Southern California.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_01: And so um we were there to get two sisters, and we got two sisters, and that's kind of how it worked.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_01: Um, there definitely was a lot of paperwork, and I I want to say California is pretty strict.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, I can't work they're hard with everything, so I can't imagine what it's like with it.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, there's always gonna be a lot of paperwork and a lot of just the nitty-gritty stuff that you know to me, you know, it's like, okay, well, I'm taking on this child, so there's all the legal stuff that goes with that.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_01: But yeah, um, the relationship is the most important thing, but all the other stuff is a necessity too.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_01: So they did go through all the paperwork and they got everything done, and um I don't remember there being a lot of um you know, conflict or anything.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_01: It was pretty pretty smooth, I think.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_04: That's awesome.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_04: That's amazing.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_01: So the second go-around though, um, and I don't know if you want to go through this now, but yeah, I do.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_04: I'd love to hear it.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_01: My okay, so my youngest sister, we um she was um a premi.
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_01: So this is in Idaho now.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_01: So this is about seven years after the two sisters um were adopted, and um it was in Idaho, and my parents decided that they wanted to um just foster.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_01: They didn't want to foster to adopt, it was their plan to just foster.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so the the goal then was just to reunite with parent biological parents and um help them get back on track so that they can take care of their child.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_01: So um that's kind of what they went in for.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_01: And um, like I say, plan is kind of a turn of a deacon lightly because and you called her your little sister, so yeah, yeah.
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_01: So you know the end game there.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_01: But yeah, so she was um one pound nine ounces when she was born.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_01: Oh my gosh.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_01: And she was on oxygen and a heart monitor.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_01: She had a lot of um just health issues and stuff and it it broke our heart seeing that.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_01: But um anyway, so my when my parents decided to foster, they they got their we were in Idaho and they got their um home study done.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_01: Um, which is just basically to check out the house, make sure it's all good.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_01: This was pre-any foster kid in Idaho.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, and so they they had the house for it, they had the home study, everything was good.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_01: The caseworker was like, okay, it'll be like two weeks before you hear anything from us.
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_01: Um and so my mom like, you know, went to Costco and go shopping, and um, while she was gone, my dad got a phone call and um they said, Hey, there's a a premium in the hospital that needs a home.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_01: And um my mom has a nursing background.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_01: Wow and so they kind of they tend to, if they can, um go with families who have that background with kids.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_01: And so my mom has such a big heart and she was she just can't say no to anything, and so she was like, sure, we'll do it.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_01: So um it wasn't even you know a 24 hours after the home study, and they were already taking in a kid.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_04: So um now had this had her had she been in the hospital for a long time previous to this?
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_04: She had, okay.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, she was about yeah, she was about three months old when we knew about her.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and she was in the hospital all the time with, like I said, the the heart monitor and the oxygen and everything.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_01: Um so yeah, she was about three months old, but um she had a really hard time just battling, you know.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_01: getting her lungs strong enough and her heart strong enough and everything.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_01: Um but yeah, so we ended up taking her home and she, oh my goodness, she is such a fighter.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_01: She's she was about, you know, like probably a foot long, if even that, you know, and um super, super tiny.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_01: And all of us kids just loved her so much.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_01: We were like, a little baby in the house and you get to hold her and feed her and all this stuff.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_01: Um but she so she stayed with us for a little while and um by the time I don't know the timing exactly but I know um part of that process this was the story that was like up and down, up and down and it was very hard emotionally.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_01: So for a while there my parents were really trying to um get her parents back on track and help them make those choices and get them to where they they can take her and um be her parents and um long story short it didn't work out.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_01: They ended up um saying that they wanted us to adopt her and um that was really I mean I was ecstatic.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_01: I was like you know she was just the light of our life yeah made her way into your home and your hearts.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_01: For sure and all of us kids were just in love with her and my mom she has a hard time with like letting go and she had already you know she was already in love with this little baby and it was so hard to say just think of saying goodbye.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_01: So we were we were so excited that they wanted us to adopt her and we were gonna move forward with that and then um part of that process is to look for any other biological family.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_01: And so the court needed to um do that kind of you know homework and and look for another family and there was actually a biological grandma that um stepped up.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_01: Oh wow um wanted to take her and we were it was so hard because we just thought you know why we wanted we she was just part of our family and we got so attached to her and and then you just think of giving her away and that's so hard.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_04: So and it's hard because you want them to be with family if they can be healthy again.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_04: And that's I mean I think that's the tear of the fostering process is that it's this you you gotta leave room for hope for ultimate restoration with biological and yet feel like oh but we could give the best thing for you.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_01: I know yeah that's definitely a constant thing that my parents go through and I admire them so much for just how much they give and give and give and then you know sometimes it does work out and they they go home and it's so beautiful to see that reunification and that um just that redemption of their family and um it is a beautiful thing.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: But with this kit situation with my little sister she did end up um the gr the biological grandma didn't end up working out um they did look into it and everything and it didn't work out so we ended up adopting her.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_01: Wow and um yeah it was she's healthy and strong and fighter yes yes and she is my hero how old is she now she is gonna turn 10 in about a month so wow it's actually May 1st the launch date so she that's her birthday and that's in honor of her I decided to launch the book that kind of inspired all of that is our you know oh that's so great.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_04: Oh yeah so let's talk about I mean that's kind of why we're talking it's the book it's so awesome there are so many questions about the book and we want to let our audience you know get um the what the story is about because it's great and it's definitely worth the read.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_01: But of writing when did that desire develop in you have you always been a writer you know kind of what's the story of that journey yeah I so my dad loves to write and um he kind of inspired me to eventually get to that point.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_01: But when I was about nine for my ninth birthday I remember um instead of goodie bags you know where you give to your friends all this like little bag of candy and a little you know these little toys that are like gonna fall apart the next day.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_02: So instead of doing that we all like as parents throw in the trash as soon as they come home.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah so you would appreciate this I was like I would have a goodie bag I decided that I was going to make all of my friends little homemade books.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_01: And I hand wrote every single one and I hand illustrated them and I hand bound them.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_04: Love it that's so great.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_01: That's a gift I they weren't um very good quality obviously but um but lots of love in it and that's kind of where it started I just remember doing that and feeling so happy that I had like you know whatever ten or a dozen just handmade books and these were mine and so that kind of just inspired me to eventually um just become a writer.
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_01: I was like you know this is kind of fun like I want to just do this and there's something about stories and um just sharing that with people and um yeah so I just decided to keep up with it.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_04: So your dad you said your dad was a writer or that he inspired some of that.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_04: Is it something that he's actively pursued in his own life or is he probably had to put a lot of it on hold having all these kids through the house.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_01: He did he made so many sacrifices so he's always kind of wanted to write a book as well.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_01: Um he will be probably um towards I don't know when his goal is he just decided recently that he was gonna sit down and do it.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_01: So awesome maybe a page the way Sadie that's awesome.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_04: Maybe I did it's a we both inspired each other.
• 28:12
  SPEAKER_04: That's great.
• 28:12
  SPEAKER_04: I love it.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_04: Awesome.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah yeah so he's just always you know just written things and helped me with my writing and you know edited things I remember it was funny because I would I would always write little stories you know a few dozen pages or something and I'd I'd proudly come like he'd come home from work and he I'd proudly show it to him and I'd be like what do you think dad and he would he would take it and over the evening he would edit it and then by the end of the evening he'd give it back with all his little red marks and everything and I was like part of me was so discouraged because I was like oh all these mistakes you know I want perfect but I also remember just being so thankful for him being able to take that time and to you know just mold me into something better and grow your craft.
• 29:01
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah that really helped me later on in life and um when I decided to um just for this specific book when I decided to actually write it um my husband was he was at then my fiance but now my husband um he was also a big inspiration because um he's just a go getter and he's he's just like well why don't you just do it and I was like oh why not and I was working full time at the time and it was it was pretty stressful there was a lot going on.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_01: Sure.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_01: And we were gonna get married that summer so the end of that summer and there was just so much going on but I was like you know what why not?
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_01: So I quit the full-time job I made that a priority got married and then after we got married and went on our honeymoon um I got back and I was like I'm writing a book so I just decided to do that and um plugged away at it and it there were so many other people that I'd like to give credit for but I'll wait for the acknowledgement section like that's great.
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_04: I well that's the that's the thing is um a book takes a community you know it takes a ton of people involved and I think if you put yourself to writing you can you have to develop a teachable spirit in the process because it it like you said you could have been defeated and cut down by your dad's edits or his corrections and it instead you allow it to create a better project or product and you know skill set in you if you're willing to learn from it.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_01: But it's hard it's sometimes a tough thing to swallow and to and subject yourself you know to like ah there you go yeah there's a lot of times where I was you know just the whole process of writing it and editing it and finding beta readers and just the marketing plan all of this stuff is like especially if you don't have a great um strong you know view of yourself you know it's like you tend to like just it weighs on you and you realize maybe I can't do this by myself and you know you just kind of let people help you and you realize it's not it doesn't have to be exactly the way you thought it would be and you just let it go and um yeah there are things I wish maybe I would have done a little bit different but in the end I have a beautiful book that I'm proud of and yeah I am willing I I'm so excited to share that with people and to share that story and the message and everything.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_04: So that's awesome.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_01: It's definitely worth it if you can stick through it.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_04: That's right.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_04: So in your process it sounds it looks like you determined the way for you to go at least with this book was the self-publishing what you know ended up getting you to go that direction set of the traditional route and I mean both are a process both in their own you know take a lot of work.
• 31:53
  SPEAKER_01: So what kind of ended up turning you that direction um you know what I was also um really I was just really um unsure of which way to go for a while.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_01: I asked a few different people who have published their own books and um just kind of did a lot of research and asked people what what do you suggest and I'm one that likes to get everybody's advice and then I'll make my own decision.
• 32:20
  SPEAKER_01: So I did a lot of gathering all those creation and um just different perspectives and stuff.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_01: And I ultimately decided that I would um query agents for a little while.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah um I would send out these query letters and um you know just pray if that's the way it goes have somebody respond to me and if not I had a date that I would start with the self-publishing route.
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_02: Good for you.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_02: That's great.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_01: So it was kind of a really indecisive way of doing it in a sense.
• 32:53
  SPEAKER_04: I think that's great.
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_01: But that to me I prayed about it really hard because I was like you know either way I have a book and I'm gonna be part of that.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_01: And so either way it's gonna be something that I can stand behind and it's gonna be great.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_01: So that's awesome.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_01: I I came to terms with either one would be the best thing ever and I could be happy with either one.
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_01: And so I I just started quarrying and I probably quarried a couple dozen maybe um more but it's it's definitely hard.
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_01: That's another reason um it kind of is hard when you doubt yourself a little bit you're like well is this worth is this worth it yeah there's so many people that that just auto respond and it's not fun to go through that process but I just thought you know if it's an avenue that God wants for me I'm gonna open that door and if not yeah I have another door waiting for me.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_01: So that's right it wasn't it wasn't gonna be um hard either way.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_01: I could just I could work with either one.
• 33:56
  SPEAKER_01: So that's kind of how I went about it and I know a lot of other people have more of a firm idea of what they want.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yep and they go with it and that's totally fine too but for me it was kind of since I'd never done it before I was like well just I'll I'll try both and see which one works.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_01: And so self-publishing it is and I am super excited and I get to have a say on every little thing and I'm yeah I'm super excited to share all this stuff that I've learned and um figured out along the way.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_04: Oh that's awesome.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_04: Now I know your inspiration and this is reason why we were kind of asking about your childhood and now is is you know the fostering and watching your parents and watching foster kids come through your home and the adoption process and all of that that's the inspiration behind the book.
• 34:43
  SPEAKER_04: So you know give us a little bit of you know why you went this route specifically because you know if even if you love to write you could write about a lot of things.
• 34:54
  SPEAKER_04: But um why specifically this and why do you feel like there's a need um to communicate the story through fiction yeah that's a big question.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_01: So that's a couple questions for different reasons.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_01: I know yeah um so it's shaped me in so many ways honestly it's it's so important and I think um one way is just that it's made me realize how your words can affect other people and um you know when you say something you need to follow through and that's how you build trust and that's how you build this foundation of love and hope and everything.
• 35:37
  SPEAKER_01: And so um that's one way that it kind of is so important to me and um just the stories behind it.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_01: So stories are um super important to me and um it's like the good and the bad and the ugly.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_01: It's like all of it is just um important because that's how our world goes around and you know that's how that's what gives life to people and that's what makes us who we are it is and that's I think that's so important for people to realize because a lot of times when you say oh my story isn't worth sharing or I have just a really bad history, bad past and um yeah there there's probably a lot of ugly in there and a lot of hurt but there's so much hope that can be found in that and um just being able to accept that as your own and um just be able to stand above that and to rise above just just the pain that you went through and everything I feel like that's something that is worth a hundred books you know just just the if I can give somebody hope that their story is worth it and that they went through what they did for a reason and that they can um just move on after that in a sense I think that would be worth it and um part of my book is there's a line in there that says you are beautiful you are loved and you're created per for a purpose and the person that says that in this book is a foster mom and she is talking to Brie, the main character and she says she says that just because um Brie is going through a really really hard time and um she's in a really dark place and yet when you say that those words to somebody who's in that dark place um I think there's so much power in that because you realize okay maybe I'm going through a hard thing but I'm beautiful and I'm loved and creative for purpose and those three things they don't go away like they are firm and they are what you need to remember about yourself.
• 37:45
  SPEAKER_04: Seeds of hope.
• 37:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah yeah and if you can remember just so that simple thing um I really think that that can change lives I think um it did for me um I went through a really hard time um just a couple of bad breakups and I know that sounds you know kind of lame but when you're in the moment it just feels hard and um that's another reason is not even just for kids who have been in foster care for this book.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's people who have um been through hard things and they feel hopeless and these lies that tell them that they're not loved, they're not beautiful and they're not good enough.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_01: Like those are lies and they need to realize that so I think um just stories in general are why I wrote the book and how I hope to be able to share um just that seed of hope like you said and um just to share that grace that you can have and on these people that don't really you know see it.
• 38:49
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah they don't think it because they're stuck in that darkness.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah that's awesome that is so kind of totally switching we kind of given a little taste of the book but for you personally you're you know you're married you're only a couple years in uh having lived in a home you know where adoption and fostering is happening is that a vision for you guys someday or or are you kind of like no I lived vicariously through my parents I think I've done enough to think that yeah it's easy to think like okay well my parents did it you know I did my time but no it's for sure we we definitely are praying about it and um it's definitely about seasons and I think a lot of people um put so much pressure on young married couples to just like start a family and go for it.
• 39:39
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like it's about seasons and I truly believe that so I don't through this book I don't want to pressure people to be like oh well you need to be foster parents you want to do that it's like that's not at all what I'm trying to do.
• 39:52
  SPEAKER_01: I do think that's great if you feel convicted um but I don't want to pressure it to anybody including myself yes right so so we are praying about it we are in the future thinking about fostering or adopting um it's definitely on our radar um but in the meantime it's it's more than just foster parenting too I think you can um I think you can definitely see that like it can just be taken that way you can just take it where oh foster parenting is the point of this and um but you can also do other things and it's all about giving grace to people that are broken and hurting.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_01: So it's it's not necessarily the giving it to our own kids right as parents.
• 40:38
  SPEAKER_01: For sure yeah it's it's bigger than just you know one thing I think it's a way of life it's how Christians are supposed to be and that's how we're created to be.
• 40:50
  SPEAKER_01: And so I think if you can um just realize that and and give grace to people and show hope um in Christ I think that's the main point of this you know and one thing that my husband and I do is we volunteer with um I think an organization called Youth for Christ and they um I don't know if you guys have heard of it international but um so they they just reach out to kids and their middle school and high school is what we do.
• 41:21
  SPEAKER_01: We volunteer with the high school group and um it's just amazing to see what relationships can do.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_01: And you know that they're all about relationships and about building that to where they trust you and um in their brokenness in their hurt they can come to you and they can trust that you're gonna give them good advice and you're just gonna be that listening ear for them and you're gonna point them in the right direction.
• 41:48
  SPEAKER_01: They can trust you with their future because because they've seen that in your relationship.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah so it can be any relation it can be you know just calling up your friend and saying hey you are beautiful loved and created for a purpose yeah you know and if you can just say those things to the people around you I really think that that can be powerful.
• 42:11
  SPEAKER_04: So absolutely I see it.
• 42:14
  SPEAKER_04: For my own kids who um well we're part of a a newer church plant uh we're still a pretty decent size though and those who are working in particular with like the first through fifth grade the impact that those workers who are in there and who are intentional with their time there are plenty of those who I see kind of go there and they stand around and they're not too sure what to do with themselves.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_04: But those who you know make that connection with the kids and when they break into small group time they ask questions that lead to honest answers and the opportunity to share and open up.
• 42:49
  SPEAKER_04: Like that's that's they're speaking those sort of things into their lives by just being seen and heard and valued and then speaking truth back to them depending on the situations.
• 42:59
  SPEAKER_04: And when they use that time to not just manage the kids but to pour into the kids it's just as effective in what you're talking about where they're able to speak that value and those seeds of hope because there's kids coming from all sorts of situations.
• 43:12
  SPEAKER_04: And um and mine are certainly blessed and impacted by it and I'm so grateful for other people who are speaking into my kids' lives because they get sick of hearing my voice.
• 43:23
  SPEAKER_01: All right well that's all it is is intentionality.
• 43:25
  SPEAKER_01: If you are intentional um with your time and with your words that's just a beautiful thing and um it definitely yeah and it's you don't know what the other person has gone through.
• 43:38
  SPEAKER_01: So you have to be that that stable person.
• 43:42
  SPEAKER_01: And sometimes you're gonna be on the other end of it and you're gonna be having a hard time and going through the darkness and you're gonna need that friend.
• 43:49
  SPEAKER_01: And that's why I think it's so important for everybody to just really dig into this message is just that if you can be that person and encourage your friends To be that person, um, just to give grace and and hope and everything, that's gonna it's gonna help both of you in the long run.
• 44:08
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's gonna be a two-way street.
• 44:11
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's awesome.
• 44:12
  SPEAKER_04: So I'm kind of curious.
• 44:14
  SPEAKER_04: Um, all right, this fiction book, it tells a story about Brie.
• 44:19
  SPEAKER_04: She's the main character, and it's it's her journey.
• 44:22
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, what do you see in the future?
• 44:25
  SPEAKER_04: Do you see series?
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_04: Do you just see more, you know, around the same topic?
• 44:30
  SPEAKER_04: Kind of what's your hope and vision for the writing?
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_01: You know, that's hard to tell.
• 44:36
  SPEAKER_01: It's like asking a couple who just got married, when are you gonna have more babies?
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_01: Or when are you gonna have babies?
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_01: Which we've been on that road too.
• 44:44
  SPEAKER_01: So I know.
• 44:46
  SPEAKER_01: I know yeah, no, it's I don't know yet, to be completely honest.
• 44:53
  SPEAKER_01: I think that there are definitely more aspects of that story that I could definitely do a series or even just one, you know, a sequel.
• 45:02
  SPEAKER_01: And um, you know, whether it's like a sister's perspective or a foster mom's perspective, just so someone else, yeah, or even later on in Brie's life, you know, where she feels convicted to do something for somebody.
• 45:15
  SPEAKER_04: Which is so great because you have so much firsthand experience you could really embody and speak to all of those perspectives.
• 45:23
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and I think um that's another way that you know you get people around you to help you because I wouldn't for if it was a foster mom's perspective, I would need to go straight to the source.
• 45:33
  SPEAKER_01: And there were a so many people that helped me with this story, just legal stuff and court things and um just how the foster care system works.
• 45:43
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so there was definitely a lot of help for there, that part of it.
• 45:47
  SPEAKER_01: But um for the future, yeah, I could either I could see myself either doing another um fictional work um related to that.
• 45:56
  SPEAKER_01: Or, you know, when I first decided to write a book, like sat down and said, I'm gonna write a book, I was going back and forth between fiction and nonfiction.
• 46:06
  SPEAKER_01: And I was open to either idea, and I posted on Facebook, I said, these are my two ideas.
• 46:12
  SPEAKER_01: One was a fiction work about a girl in foster care, and the second one was a non-fiction work about learning how to trust again, which is an issue that I've had.
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_01: I've you know struggled with trust and everything, and um I think those two are both very important.
• 46:29
  SPEAKER_01: And so when I heard back from people, they they came up with the idea to combine the two.
• 46:36
  SPEAKER_01: Um and so that's kind of how this story came along, is it's kind of that that point of learning how to trust again because Brie goes through a lot of things that that sever her trust with people, and she just doesn't want anything to do with that anymore.
• 46:52
  SPEAKER_01: Um but then she also it's a story of her in foster care and her story of redemption and grace and everything.
• 47:00
  SPEAKER_01: So that's that's the way I combined it last time.
• 47:03
  SPEAKER_01: And I can see myself going either nonfiction, you know, trying something a little bit different, um, or you know, doing a sequel.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_01: So we'll see.
• 47:13
  SPEAKER_01: Keep it up.
• 47:14
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, we will.
• 47:15
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 47:15
  SPEAKER_04: I I personally would love to do both as well.
• 47:17
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, because I as a kid it was all fictional and it was mysteries, and that's what I wanted to do when I grew up, you know, be the next great mystery writer.
• 47:26
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 47:27
  SPEAKER_04: But that's not the direction the Lord has me currently in either.
• 47:30
  SPEAKER_04: But I I definitely go, well, down the road, I would, you know, that's what I play at when I, you know, no one else sees it.
• 47:37
  SPEAKER_05: You're a fiction writer in your future life?
• 47:39
  SPEAKER_04: In my future life.
• 47:40
  SPEAKER_05: Like writing the name CJ for the next generation.
• 47:42
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, exactly.
• 47:43
  SPEAKER_02: Gotcha.
• 47:44
  SPEAKER_02: Oh no, don't tell anyone that now.
• 47:46
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 47:47
  SPEAKER_02: Don't tell anyone.
• 47:48
  SPEAKER_05: Actually, sometimes I wonder, I just said it on the podcast.
• 47:54
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 47:55
  SPEAKER_02: Secret thought.
• 47:56
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 47:57
  SPEAKER_04: My oldest is a writer as well, and kind of one of those, you know, she big fan of Nancy Jew.
• 48:03
  SPEAKER_04: I think she's read all the old original ones.
• 48:05
  SPEAKER_04: And I sometimes wonder, I'm like, well, maybe maybe my gift in life gets to be helping her um, you know, kind of hone that craft as well.
• 48:14
  SPEAKER_04: You could be the one with the red pen.
• 48:16
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 48:16
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 48:17
  SPEAKER_04: Oh no, I'm not the editor.
• 48:18
  SPEAKER_04: Well, but I can help ideas.
• 48:20
  SPEAKER_04: I can't.
• 48:22
  SPEAKER_01: I tell you.
• 48:22
  SPEAKER_04: Yes, there is a big difference for sure.
• 48:25
  SPEAKER_04: But I also I wanted to say uh along those lines of self-publishing, one of our first podcasts, Tori, um, sorry, Victoria Kimball, um, I think she was episode four.
• 48:38
  SPEAKER_04: She we she had just launched her choir girl series, and they were written for Tween Girls, perfect for my older girls, and it's um they've loved those.
• 48:48
  SPEAKER_04: And what's really neat for her, she went the route too, where I think she kind of put out a couple queries, maybe didn't wasn't really sure which way to go as well, kind of like you.
• 48:59
  SPEAKER_04: Um, but I noticed maybe just a couple months ago, she got signed with an agent.
• 49:03
  SPEAKER_04: Um, she's already released the whole series of the choir girls, but she has more, you know, more in her that she loved to do.
• 49:09
  SPEAKER_04: And so that's been kind of neat to watch um that journey for her unfold where she just went ahead and went with it and got enough feedback that this was the way she should go.
• 49:18
  SPEAKER_04: And so she's been really faithful with that and released all of those, I think, within a year's time or less than a year's time.
• 49:24
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I remember it was really short.
• 49:25
  SPEAKER_04: Amazing.
• 49:26
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 49:27
  SPEAKER_04: So so she did the stuff self-publishing, but then um is gonna be able to go on and do more with the help of an agent, which is is pretty cool.
• 49:34
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, you know, for you too, just going forward with it.
• 49:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 49:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, there's definitely different avenues, and everybody's story is different.
• 49:42
  SPEAKER_01: But I think yeah, just trying different things and the God opens doors when it's supposed to happen.
• 49:49
  SPEAKER_01: And so definitely I think that's cool to watch other people go through similar to what you're going through and hope for maybe, oh, that might be me someday.
• 49:57
  SPEAKER_04: And yeah, um, yeah, yeah, or we just get to do it, you know, get to watch our kids like your dad, you know.
• 50:04
  SPEAKER_04: I think that's just really, really great.
• 50:06
  SPEAKER_04: That's special.
• 50:06
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, that's awesome.
• 50:07
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 50:08
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so you mentioned your release date is May 1st.
• 50:12
  SPEAKER_04: And I'm trying to remember on the calendar, we may have um, if we're releasing it before or after, I can't remember all of a sudden I try to be good about remembering that.
• 50:21
  SPEAKER_04: So um, but uh I know that we want to share ahead of time and just help you with your launch and everything.
• 50:28
  SPEAKER_04: So what are some of the um I know you're you know you're thinking through some of the release goodies that you're gonna, you know, have and stuff like that.
• 50:37
  SPEAKER_04: And will we be able to buy it on Amazon?
• 50:39
  SPEAKER_04: What does that look like?
• 50:40
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so it'll be on Amazon.
• 50:42
  SPEAKER_01: It's called More To Me, and um, it'll definitely be on Amazon.
• 50:47
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I'm still going through different options for um like the pre-order bonuses and that kind of thing.
• 50:53
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 50:54
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but I'm kind of you know tossing around maybe like a cool bookmark or um stickers.
• 51:00
  SPEAKER_01: There's just so many cool ideas out there and Pinteresting like every day.
• 51:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, I would have Pinterest.
• 51:07
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, there's definitely gonna be some goodies.
• 51:10
  SPEAKER_01: And um yeah, May 1st is the launch date and it'll be available on Amazon.
• 51:16
  SPEAKER_01: I'll probably also have some signed copies eventually on my website page.
• 51:20
  SPEAKER_01: Great.
• 51:21
  SPEAKER_01: So um maybe not right away.
• 51:23
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not sure how the timing of that'll work, but definitely keep in touch for some signed copies if you're interested.
• 51:29
  SPEAKER_01: Um but Amazon would be the glad to do a giveaway then.
• 51:32
  SPEAKER_05: Oh totally.
• 51:32
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I can't wait to see the finished product.
• 51:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 51:34
  SPEAKER_01: I know, me too.
• 51:35
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's getting designed right now as a study.
• 51:38
  SPEAKER_01: So I am so excited.
• 51:40
  SPEAKER_01: It's it's one thing to write a book, but when you can see it, you know, in your hand, I can't I can't imagine how exciting that would be to have it in your head.
• 51:48
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, that's gotta be really fun.
• 51:50
  SPEAKER_04: So, okay, before we let you go, you know, what are like maybe two or three things that you want people to walk away with after they read your book?
• 51:59
  SPEAKER_04: And you I you kind of covered one a little bit, but I'd love to have you just reiterate that um as people listen.
• 52:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so more than anything, I just I want every single reader to feel wholly loved and just that grace is for you, you know?
• 52:20
  SPEAKER_01: Like I feel that everybody goes through a season where they are not, um they don't know if their future has any hope.
• 52:30
  SPEAKER_01: And um, if every reader can feel that and to pass that on to the people around them, um, I really think that that can be um a beautiful thing.
• 52:39
  SPEAKER_01: And also, I think I mentioned this one a little bit too, just that people can give grace in their communities.
• 52:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 52:45
  SPEAKER_01: Because um, not even just in foster care, but other ways, just that that that can be spread around.
• 52:52
  SPEAKER_01: And um I honestly with you know, my short years around, I think that that's super important.
• 52:59
  SPEAKER_01: And yeah, um, grace and hope are just they seem cliche, but they are very important.
• 53:06
  SPEAKER_01: And if you can spread that around um in tons of different ways, you know, homeless shelters or calling a friend, or you know, just a way that you can serve other people and give that grace and show them that there is hope despite their past and um even because of their past.
• 53:24
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, yeah.
• 53:24
  SPEAKER_01: I think that's that's what I want to share with people.
• 53:28
  SPEAKER_04: That's beautiful.
• 53:29
  SPEAKER_04: Love it.
• 53:30
  SPEAKER_04: Well, thank you, Sadie.
• 53:31
  SPEAKER_04: We are definitely going to be watching and just seeing what on all unfolds for you, and I'm sure it's gonna there's gonna be more to come and we'll be chatting new with us.
• 53:41
  SPEAKER_04: Thanks so much.
• 53:42
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I appreciate you having me on.
• 53:44
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it was wonderful.
• 53:45
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, thanks for coming.
• 53:46
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, have a great rest of the day.
• 53:48
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks, you too.
• 53:49
  SPEAKER_01: Bye.
• 53:49
  SPEAKER_01: Bye bye.
• 53:50
  SPEAKER_01: Bye.
• 53:50
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so Sadie is so sweet.
• 53:54
  SPEAKER_05: She is so sweet.
• 53:55
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I really love that conversation.
• 53:56
  SPEAKER_05: Um, I didn't realize I didn't realize how young she was.
• 53:59
  SPEAKER_05: I mean, she's really and she's already produced a book.
• 54:02
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
• 54:02
  SPEAKER_05: Way to go.
• 54:03
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it's awesome.
• 54:04
  SPEAKER_05: I love the way she she talked about how she just kind of even the way she made her plan.
• 54:09
  SPEAKER_05: Like, I didn't know if I wanted to self-publish or publish.
• 54:11
  SPEAKER_05: So I just gave it a deadline.
• 54:13
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, well, if nothing happens by then, then I'll just do this.
• 54:15
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, that's maturity.
• 54:17
  SPEAKER_05: Low pressure, too.
• 54:18
  SPEAKER_05: Like, I'm gonna get the book done and I'm gonna be happy with my book, and I don't really care how it gets done.
• 54:22
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I really like that.
• 54:24
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I think that's the uh just the neat thing of the younger generation, whether they're millennials or what's the one after that?
• 54:31
  SPEAKER_04: I don't remember.
• 54:32
  SPEAKER_03: I can't remember what we were calling them.
• 54:33
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
• 54:34
  SPEAKER_04: It's like post-millennials?
• 54:36
  SPEAKER_04: No, it's not X theological term.
• 54:37
  SPEAKER_04: Y or something.
• 54:39
  SPEAKER_04: No, um, but I think I think the beauty of it is that they're they don't place as many limitations that the generations before them did.
• 54:47
  SPEAKER_04: Where they where I think there's like this misnomer that you have to arrive at a certain knowledge base, education base, or experience in order to do X, Y, and Z.
• 54:55
  SPEAKER_05: Maybe that's the plus side.
• 54:56
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, usually this is played as a negative.
• 54:59
  SPEAKER_05: Like parents, you've just been telling your kids they can be anything they want to be and they could do anything.
• 55:03
  SPEAKER_05: And yeah, there's some like that's not realistic.
• 55:05
  SPEAKER_05: But maybe this is the plus side.
• 55:07
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, they're like, I'll just try anything.
• 55:09
  SPEAKER_05: She's just gonna go ahead and do it.
• 55:10
  SPEAKER_05: Why not just try it?
• 55:11
  SPEAKER_04: And she's produced something with a really meaningful message.
• 55:13
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 55:14
  SPEAKER_05: And I think people will like it too.
• 55:15
  SPEAKER_05: And I haven't had a chance to finish it, but I know that I when I started, because it was on my laptop, I had the, you know, the P not maybe it's a PDF, whatever it is.
• 55:23
  SPEAKER_05: And um, yeah, I think I got sucked into the story really quick.
• 55:26
  SPEAKER_05: I found it to be something that oh, I want kind of want to know what's happening with this child.
• 55:30
  SPEAKER_04: So Yeah, yeah.
• 55:31
  SPEAKER_04: Uh it's yeah, I think it's really fantastic and it's a quick read but meaningful.
• 55:36
  SPEAKER_04: And um, I think it's something that people will continue to think about after they're done reading it and want to pass on and you know, just and I I like the proactive, you know, thinking that she had.
• 55:47
  SPEAKER_04: Well, it's not just about foster care, it's not just about adoption.
• 55:50
  SPEAKER_04: Right.
• 55:51
  SPEAKER_04: It the I don't know, the moral of the story can have so much more meaningful.
• 55:56
  SPEAKER_05: Well, it's kind of a parable.
• 55:57
  SPEAKER_05: It's like you read it as a parable for all of life.
• 56:00
  SPEAKER_05: So this is these are the characters in this story, but everybody needs to know this.
• 56:04
  SPEAKER_05: You know, it's just how how we get to the place where we have these gaps or lacks, or or you know what I'm saying, like in just knowing who we are.
• 56:12
  SPEAKER_05: We all get there it in different ways, but we kind of all need to hear the same things.
• 56:15
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, because she didn't grow up in the foster care system and she has you know struggles with the trust issue.
• 56:22
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 56:22
  SPEAKER_04: So, you know, and normally you would attribute that to someone who did grow up in the foster care system, understandably, but um, perhaps being, you know, rejected or abandoned or having to deal with home after home.
• 56:34
  SPEAKER_04: Um yeah, so it just goes to show like you can have an ideal childhood, amazing parents, and you still like innately we just have some of these issues.
• 56:44
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 56:44
  SPEAKER_05: And we we all live life with other humans and whether we're related to them directly by blood or like she said, she had a couple of bad breakups, and that'll do it to you.
• 56:52
  SPEAKER_05: So absolutely just living life.
• 56:54
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 56:55
  SPEAKER_04: It's it's good.
• 56:56
  SPEAKER_04: So it's good.
• 56:57
  SPEAKER_04: What do you think um your kids would do?
• 56:58
  SPEAKER_04: Just like the what if you guys suddenly were like, let's foster or adopt.
• 57:03
  SPEAKER_05: Oh my gosh.
• 57:04
  SPEAKER_05: Um, I don't know.
• 57:07
  SPEAKER_05: I honestly don't know.
• 57:08
  SPEAKER_05: I think they might kind of think it was cool.
• 57:10
  SPEAKER_05: Kaylee would think it was the best thing ever, probably.
• 57:12
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 57:12
  SPEAKER_05: Um at one point anyway.
• 57:14
  SPEAKER_05: She's the 20-year-old.
• 57:15
  SPEAKER_05: She would be like, Yeah, do that.
• 57:16
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 57:16
  SPEAKER_05: Um, I think she would.
• 57:18
  SPEAKER_05: Um I think she would too.
• 57:19
  SPEAKER_05: I she you know, something we've talked about in the past.
• 57:21
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 57:22
  SPEAKER_05: So I think that she would be up for that.
• 57:24
  SPEAKER_05: Um, yeah, I don't know about that other thing.
• 57:26
  SPEAKER_05: A couple of uh the other kids, a couple of them would feel like they were like, What?
• 57:29
  SPEAKER_05: I have to share my stuff.
• 57:30
  SPEAKER_05: It would be like what she said.
• 57:31
  SPEAKER_05: There's the real, which is very attractive actually.
• 57:35
  SPEAKER_05: Like you need to learn that there's other stuff, you know, and that there's a different way of life that people live out there and their needs.
• 57:43
  SPEAKER_05: They have these actual tangible physical needs that you don't even think about because you know, you just know it's not a problem.
• 57:49
  SPEAKER_05: It's not a thing.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_05: Um, but I don't know.
• 57:51
  SPEAKER_05: I think it would be interesting.
• 57:52
  SPEAKER_05: I think it would be it would be it would be a learning experience.
• 57:56
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 57:56
  SPEAKER_05: Um, I don't think it's something adoption is a thing that I've thought about, you know, for years.
• 58:01
  SPEAKER_05: I don't think we're in a place to do it right at the moment.
• 58:04
  SPEAKER_05: But um yeah, it's definitely something I would consider doing.
• 58:09
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 58:10
  SPEAKER_04: I think it's kind of a I think a lot of people out there at least consider it.
• 58:14
  SPEAKER_04: Oh yeah.
• 58:15
  SPEAKER_04: And then it may play out differently.
• 58:17
  SPEAKER_04: But that's kind of a right, right.
• 58:20
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so it's almost summertime.
• 58:24
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 58:24
  SPEAKER_04: Can you believe it?
• 58:25
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 58:26
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, are you ready for the kids to be out of school?
• 58:28
  SPEAKER_04: Not quite.
• 58:29
  SPEAKER_04: All right, so let's talk about creating a simply summer.
• 58:32
  SPEAKER_04: Let's talk about that.
• 58:33
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 58:34
  SPEAKER_04: So okay, so you did a super summer challenge.
• 58:38
  SPEAKER_04: You went through like creating a simply summer course last year.
• 58:42
  SPEAKER_05: I tried.
• 58:42
  SPEAKER_05: I tried because I tried.
• 58:44
  SPEAKER_05: I'm laughing because I tried and it didn't really happen.
• 58:46
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so what I would really love to know this.
• 58:48
  SPEAKER_04: And this is like I I am like I want to share this.
• 58:53
  SPEAKER_04: So I gave you the course for free.
• 58:55
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, you did.
• 58:56
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, I did.
• 58:57
  SPEAKER_03: You did.
• 58:57
  SPEAKER_04: Because I wanted your feedback.
• 58:59
  SPEAKER_04: Right.
• 58:59
  SPEAKER_04: And I know, especially when it's something that I'm like writing, my brain doesn't necessarily transfer into the written word really well.
• 59:07
  SPEAKER_05: Well, sometimes you think you've explained something because you know what you're saying.
• 59:10
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 59:10
  SPEAKER_04: And you've and you've experienced it firsthand.
• 59:12
  SPEAKER_05: Right.
• 59:12
  SPEAKER_05: So you feel like this is obvious.
• 59:14
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it does not be.
• 59:15
  SPEAKER_04: It does, and it may not.
• 59:16
  SPEAKER_04: And so that's where I'm growing and and developing that.
• 59:19
  SPEAKER_04: So you you started the Simply Summer course.
• 59:22
  SPEAKER_04: Did you actually finish it?
• 59:24
  SPEAKER_04: You mean watching it?
• 59:25
  unknown: Yeah.
• 59:25
  SPEAKER_04: Well, I watched all the videos.
• 59:26
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, you did.
• 59:27
  SPEAKER_04: You watch all the videos.
• 59:28
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so what did you take away and try to implement last summer?
• 59:32
  SPEAKER_04: And if you didn't do anything, that's fine.
• 59:34
  SPEAKER_04: I'm asking.
• 59:34
  SPEAKER_05: I don't even know.
• 59:35
  SPEAKER_05: I'll be honest.
• 59:36
  SPEAKER_05: I don't remember a lot about last summer.
• 59:38
  SPEAKER_03: You don't?
• 59:38
  SPEAKER_03: This is my life.
• 59:40
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know what happened last week.
• 59:42
  SPEAKER_03: I remember some of it.
• 59:43
  SPEAKER_03: I remember, I really don't.
• 59:44
  SPEAKER_03: It gets all we did a mid-summer check-in.
• 59:47
  SPEAKER_05: Yes, we did.
• 59:48
  SPEAKER_05: No, I um okay, I did make okay.
• 59:53
  SPEAKER_05: Here's the thing I did.
• 59:54
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 59:54
  SPEAKER_05: It's all coming back to me.
• 59:55
  SPEAKER_05: Good, good.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_05: I'm just looking at the overall, like, oh my gosh.
• 59:58
  SPEAKER_05: Right.
• 59:58
  SPEAKER_05: Um, but no, one thing we did do though was make a schedule for, you know, there were certain things they had to get done during the day.
• 1:00:05
  SPEAKER_05: So it was a list of maybe six or seven things.
• 1:00:09
  SPEAKER_05: Like before you play video games or access technology, there was certain things.
• 1:00:14
  SPEAKER_05: So we had they had to do like and I started small.
• 1:00:16
  SPEAKER_05: It was like 15 minutes maybe of Bible time.
• 1:00:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:00:19
  SPEAKER_05: And that could be listening to it, it could be the audio version, it could be reading the a devotional.
• 1:00:23
  SPEAKER_05: We have some kids' devotionals, uh-huh.
• 1:00:25
  SPEAKER_05: Things like that, or actually reading, you know, an actual Bible, whatever.
• 1:00:28
  SPEAKER_05: It just had to be something in that category.
• 1:00:31
  SPEAKER_05: Um, they had to spend, do I just give them like a five-minute cleanup.
• 1:00:35
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 1:00:35
  SPEAKER_05: So I figure every day if they do a five quick five minute cleanup, we can manage and maintain bedrooms and things like that and like run around, or maybe it was set actually it was seven minutes.
• 1:00:43
  SPEAKER_05: I did seven because seven's like a weird number and it just felt good.
• 1:00:46
  SPEAKER_05: So seven.
• 1:00:47
  SPEAKER_05: And it was like get your stuff if you find things downstairs that needs to go up, do that.
• 1:00:50
  SPEAKER_05: So it was a seven minute cleanup.
• 1:00:52
  SPEAKER_05: Uh, things like that.
• 1:00:53
  SPEAKER_05: I mean, it was just a couple of reading had to read for like 20 minutes, just a book that wasn't not the Bible reading, it was just totally different.
• 1:00:59
  SPEAKER_05: And so I don't there was a few more things.
• 1:01:01
  SPEAKER_05: They had to do some exercise.
• 1:01:02
  SPEAKER_05: Like, go, it could be run outside, you can ride your bike for 20 minutes around, I don't care, 20 minutes worth of exercise.
• 1:01:07
  SPEAKER_05: And uh, there's a few more things that I don't remember, but it was and they did it.
• 1:01:11
  SPEAKER_05: I mean, they're very motivated, and sometimes they were done really early.
• 1:01:15
  SPEAKER_05: I was like, this isn't taking long enough.
• 1:01:17
  SPEAKER_05: I need some more stuff.
• 1:01:18
  SPEAKER_05: Right.
• 1:01:19
  SPEAKER_05: But you know, and they're their um like video game time is very limited anyway.
• 1:01:23
  SPEAKER_05: They get 30 minutes.
• 1:01:24
  SPEAKER_05: Right.
• 1:01:24
  SPEAKER_05: And then you know, during the summer, I might give them a second 30 minute session in the afternoon after we've done a bunch of other stuff, but right.
• 1:01:30
  SPEAKER_05: That's something I definitely do not want them doing all day.
• 1:01:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:01:33
  SPEAKER_05: So this summer I would like to have some more planned outing type things.
• 1:01:38
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 1:01:38
  SPEAKER_05: So I still I'm gonna keep doing that schedule, but I would like to do some more get out of the house and just enjoy life and nature and have kind of a sense of adventure.
• 1:01:47
  SPEAKER_04: Mm-hmm.
• 1:01:47
  SPEAKER_05: I don't know what that looks like yet.
• 1:01:49
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:01:49
  SPEAKER_05: But that's my goal.
• 1:01:50
  SPEAKER_04: What are some of the skills that you'd really like for them to grow in for the summer?
• 1:01:55
  SPEAKER_05: Well, I feel like we're behind in the maturity scale.
• 1:01:58
  SPEAKER_05: Um, just like, you know, like I've done too many things for them.
• 1:02:02
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, yeah.
• 1:02:03
  SPEAKER_05: As far as just babying them.
• 1:02:04
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, sure.
• 1:02:05
  SPEAKER_05: So there's things that I want to do.
• 1:02:06
  SPEAKER_05: Because we're raising adults.
• 1:02:07
  SPEAKER_05: Yes, we're moving towards adulthood and granted, you know, they're eight, nine, and eleven, so whatever.
• 1:02:12
  SPEAKER_05: But even just little things of laundry, you know, you can run the laundry, you know, the the washing machine.
• 1:02:17
  SPEAKER_05: And they do, you know, generally will put away their laundry because I'm home.
• 1:02:21
  unknown: Right.
• 1:02:21
  SPEAKER_05: So I'm not gonna make them, you know, if I'm home, I'll do it, but sometimes I save it for them.
• 1:02:25
  SPEAKER_05: Just put away your own laundry or whatever, you know, when they get home from school.
• 1:02:29
  SPEAKER_04: It's a much needed skill.
• 1:02:30
  SPEAKER_05: It is, but they need to know how to at least run the thing and you know, what needs to come out.
• 1:02:35
  SPEAKER_05: We're gonna hang that up or lay that out to dry, or you know, just little things like that, which they can totally do.
• 1:02:40
  SPEAKER_05: Um and the boys, you know, the boys this is skill boys need.
• 1:02:43
  SPEAKER_05: Also, amen.
• 1:02:45
  SPEAKER_05: So things like that, and they can learn to help more around in the kitchen and you know, make your own lunch.
• 1:02:50
  SPEAKER_05: This is how you can make lunch.
• 1:02:51
  SPEAKER_05: You need to these are the kinds of things you need to have in a lunch, you know, like some sort of protein, some maybe some fruit, you know, and then some crunchy, if you want chips, eat chips, you know.
• 1:03:00
  SPEAKER_05: But just the small things to train them to do some more things for themselves.
• 1:03:04
  SPEAKER_05: Not because and and and then I go, well, I'm here and I'm the mom, so shouldn't I just do it?
• 1:03:10
  SPEAKER_05: You know, which most of the time I may, but at least they'll have this skill set to think through it.
• 1:03:16
  SPEAKER_05: Um, yeah, I mean, just that that's the kind of skills that I'm thinking about.
• 1:03:19
  SPEAKER_05: Now we could work on excuse me.
• 1:03:22
  SPEAKER_05: Um I don't know what, maybe some physical activity or a sport or music or you know, Corbin's into computers and wants encoding and all that kind of thing.
• 1:03:32
  SPEAKER_05: So maybe he could do some sort of a camp that you know that would help him with that.
• 1:03:37
  SPEAKER_05: And so I wanted and Riley's an artist, so I would love to to encourage that and her maybe do a camp or um a class or something.
• 1:03:45
  SPEAKER_05: You know, just something that each of them what they like and then find a way for them to excel in it.
• 1:03:50
  SPEAKER_05: To excel and grow in it.
• 1:03:51
  SPEAKER_05: Because I think everybody needs to have a thing.
• 1:03:52
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 1:03:53
  SPEAKER_05: Like this is the thing I'm good at, or that I enjoy and I'm good at it.
• 1:03:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:03:57
  SPEAKER_05: So I'd like to find that and help encourage it.
• 1:03:59
  SPEAKER_04: I love it.
• 1:04:00
  SPEAKER_04: That's awesome.
• 1:04:01
  SPEAKER_04: So do you think you'll put any more systems in place, or do you feel like uh the the getting stuff done before you get the Xbox, that's good enough for me.
• 1:04:11
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I don't know.
• 1:04:11
  SPEAKER_05: I'll have to think about that.
• 1:04:12
  SPEAKER_05: I'm not a highly systemized, systematic, I'm not a systems person.
• 1:04:17
  SPEAKER_05: That's what I'm trying to say.
• 1:04:18
  SPEAKER_05: I just did go with a flow person.
• 1:04:20
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 1:04:21
  SPEAKER_05: And so um, yeah, I I don't know.
• 1:04:23
  SPEAKER_05: I'll have to think about that and what I think is needed, necessary for us.
• 1:04:27
  SPEAKER_05: But right, you know.
• 1:04:28
  SPEAKER_04: So overall, what what do you think you gained from at least like reading and watching the videos of someplace and putting some of the things in place?
• 1:04:38
  SPEAKER_04: What would be your summary?
• 1:04:39
  SPEAKER_05: Um, well, I think it's really valuable, especially because I'm not a highly organized person, and I do kind of it it would have been better for me to have had some skills earlier in life.
• 1:04:48
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 1:04:49
  SPEAKER_05: As far as don't we all wish that?
• 1:04:51
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, for our life.
• 1:04:52
  SPEAKER_05: These are some things we need to get done, you know, and just and for my kids to know that um I want them to have fun, but then there's other things that have to get done as well.
• 1:05:00
  SPEAKER_05: And life has to life requires certain things, and you're required to do things that are not fun.
• 1:05:05
  SPEAKER_05: And so just to instill in them that you know it's both.
• 1:05:08
  SPEAKER_04: We work hard, play hard, and um Yeah, because there's a delicate balance that I mean, um, how long do summers do we actually get summers, quote unquote.
• 1:05:18
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:05:19
  SPEAKER_04: Like we can't like it's great, I want to give my kids that because they never get it again.
• 1:05:23
  SPEAKER_04: But that's the thing is you never get it again.
• 1:05:25
  SPEAKER_05: Like this isn't an actual life.
• 1:05:26
  SPEAKER_05: When you get older, you don't get summer.
• 1:05:28
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, so summer still has to be productive and meaningful and skill building and all the things.
• 1:05:33
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:05:34
  SPEAKER_05: But then but I also want to have lots of fun.
• 1:05:36
  SPEAKER_05: I want them to have the freedom of childhood.
• 1:05:37
  SPEAKER_05: I don't want them to be little adults.
• 1:05:39
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, no, I love getting to waste time at the pool.
• 1:05:42
  SPEAKER_04: Like that's a blast for all of us.
• 1:05:44
  SPEAKER_05: Plenty of that, yeah.
• 1:05:45
  SPEAKER_05: I want to do a lot of that.
• 1:05:46
  SPEAKER_04: But it's more it's actually more fun to waste that time when we've done something meaningful in the process.
• 1:05:51
  SPEAKER_05: Or when there's not things hanging over your head.
• 1:05:53
  SPEAKER_05: Oh yeah, totally.
• 1:05:54
  SPEAKER_04: We're like, oh shoot, we're gonna have to do that one.
• 1:05:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:05:56
  SPEAKER_05: So you can just relax.
• 1:05:57
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:05:58
  SPEAKER_04: That's good.
• 1:05:58
  SPEAKER_04: Awesome.
• 1:06:00
  SPEAKER_04: Well, cheers to summer.
• 1:06:01
  SPEAKER_04: I'm sure we'll be talking about it more.
• 1:06:02
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I'm sure we will.
• 1:06:04
  SPEAKER_04: You know, a big thing here.
• 1:06:05
  SPEAKER_04: It's kind of why we started the podcast.
• 1:06:07
  SPEAKER_05: So it is.
• 1:06:08
  SPEAKER_05: We always got to it was the jumping off.
• 1:06:10
  SPEAKER_04: It was.
• 1:06:11
  SPEAKER_04: And it's a big part of my life for real.
• 1:06:12
  SPEAKER_04: Like as long as I have kids in my home, yeah, there is an element of that.
• 1:06:16
  SPEAKER_04: And plus I just have liked um incorporating it into my personal life too.
• 1:06:21
  SPEAKER_04: That's always good to have just like that, you know, that two-month window of time or three months sometimes where you're like, I'm gonna do this and I'm gonna accomplish it.
• 1:06:29
  SPEAKER_04: And then yeah.
• 1:06:31
  SPEAKER_04: And then you can decide if you want to do more of it or not.
• 1:06:33
  SPEAKER_04: Right on.
• 1:06:34
  SPEAKER_04: So all right, thanks, Ashley.
• 1:06:36
  SPEAKER_04: This is good.
• 1:06:37
  SPEAKER_04: You're welcome.
• 1:06:39
  SPEAKER_04: Thanks for having me.
• 1:06:40
  SPEAKER_04: I know, it was kind of like an interview, but I wanted to talk.
• 1:06:43
  SPEAKER_04: I wanted to do this more.
• 1:06:44
  SPEAKER_04: So you guys have to let us know if you like these, you know, post and pre-conversations with Ashley Pittman.
• 1:06:51
  SPEAKER_05: Yes, yes.
• 1:06:54
  SPEAKER_05: Post-interview conversations.
• 1:06:55
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, I do hear we want more of her.
• 1:06:58
  SPEAKER_04: So there you go, folks.
• 1:06:59
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, apparently.
• 1:07:00
  SPEAKER_05: More of Ashley.
• 1:07:01
  SPEAKER_05: People have said that.
• 1:07:02
  SPEAKER_05: All right.
• 1:07:02
  SPEAKER_05: Not all the people, but some people.
• 1:07:04
  SPEAKER_04: Lots of people.
• 1:07:04
  SPEAKER_05: Some people.
• 1:07:05
  SPEAKER_04: Peace out.
• 1:07:06
  SPEAKER_04: Peace out, yo.
• 1:07:07
  SPEAKER_04: Well, if you didn't know already, I am one of those nerdy folks who likes to read the forbes, the acknowledgments, and the endorsements for the books I read.
• 1:07:16
  SPEAKER_04: So I was really honored when Sadie asked me to write one for her book, which releases next week.
• 1:07:22
  SPEAKER_04: Be sure and order your copy on Amazon and share this conversation with friends and family.
• 1:07:27
  SPEAKER_04: You can find all the ways to connect with Sadie in our show notes.
• 1:07:30
  SPEAKER_04: And while you're there, would you be so kind to leave us a rating and review?
• 1:07:34
  SPEAKER_04: Simple Deep Life recently left a five-star reading and in a word, she called our podcast Refreshing.
• 1:07:41
  SPEAKER_04: And she went on, or he went on to say so many kind things.
• 1:07:45
  SPEAKER_04: Thank you so much for taking the time to encourage us and to let others know what they could expect when they listen to one of our episodes.
• 1:07:52
  SPEAKER_04: And also, if you want some helpful ideas as you begin your plans for the summer, you can get 50 free board and busters and get on our wait list when the course opens.
• 1:08:02
  SPEAKER_04: You can find all the information at super summerchallenge.com.
• 1:08:07
  SPEAKER_04: So until next week, we hope you'll be joining us as we discover more ways to live a simply, wholehearted life.
• 1:08:13
  SPEAKER_04: Unplugged, purposeful, and intentional.