Latest / The Last Supper Club / YOU'VE MISSED THE MARK | The Last Supper Club · John 16
Transcript
- speaker-0: It's my scheme man. Morgenba! speaker-1: This is the time speaker-0: Joy, what an absolute joy. It is sweltering in here, hence why we've got a bit of watermelon. Did everyone have a slice of watermelon? Yeah. And I've asked all my guests to bring their fruit. Just give me a little wave of your fruit gang. Gang, gang, gang. Yeah, it's a very fruity evening. It's a very fruity menu because we're in John 16. After Jesus has just spoken to us about remaining in him, that we may live fruitful lives. And we need help to do that. We need the help of the Holy Spirit. He says, I'm gonna go away and send you an advocate, someone who is just like me to help you with all of the things that you need help with. And hence why we've got a very fruity menu. So we've got a tigering curry. speaker-1: Woo! speaker-0: We've got chicken and sweet potato. Because I quite like a sweet potato in my tigering curry. And you know what? Shouts goes out to everyone who's been squeezing the lime. I know that, I know I've missed the boat here, but the lime on the watermelon and then the lime on the chicken and the sweet potato. We've got that. We've got white rice, we've got a salad, thanks to Femi. speaker-1: I speaker-0: And then on dessert menus we have got a raspberry white chocolate ripple sponge cake. And you know what I'm actually really proud about is the fact that given that we're meant to be spirit-filled, it's filled with raspberries like actual raspberry. I know I know I know but when we cut it, let's see. Let's see what she'd be saying. She's melting at the moment is what she's saying. We've got a passion fruit and what's that fruit? Kiwi cheesecake. it was meant to be lemon, but the lemon said B R B, I'm gonna go passion fruit. and And yeah, loads of fruit, and all of my guests have bought a fruit that symbolises something about themselves tonight. So we're in John 16. This is sponsored by Bible Society. And this is the Everyday Faith Bible, which is a gorgeous Bible, given all the testimonies and the stories as well. Okay, my kerok is actually melting. We're gonna eat, we're gonna jump into the Bible and help Holy Spirit give us all the help that we need tonight. Shall we eat? Let's eat. speaker-1: Whee! speaker-0: We're in John 16, where Jesus, the last chapter, has made a massive claim saying that he's the true vine, the father's the dresser, and he prunes us. We're the branches that we must bear fruit. But we can only bear fruit if we remain in him. And then we're thinking, well, how are we gonna do that? We need some help. Jesus says, Don't worry, I've got you. I'm gonna send an advocate, I'm gonna send one who's exactly like me, and he's gonna help you. So before we dive into John 16, my first question is: when have you been in this situation where you felt self-sufficient, you felt like you've got it all together, and then something has happened to make you realise Uh-oh, I need help. Did you ask for help? Did you not ask for help? If the help came, what did it look like? And was it helpful? so have you ever been in a situation where you felt, yep, I've got this and been humbled to realize I need some help. I need some help. speaker-2: I have an example. Yeah, go for it. Often at work, I like to just be getting on with things because you know, you want to be self-sufficient, you got the job, know, give me my bonus. However, my work, I'm a financial analyst and my work involves like a lot of spreadsheets, Excel formulas, da da da. And I was working on something at work and I was like, no, no, I got this, just said. Do you want me to chat through it? Can I help you? I said, no, no, I got it. An hour goes by, two hours goes by. I need to hand the work in kind of soonish. And so I humbled myself and I said, hey, do you have a minute to help me? My manager was gracious and came online and he literally looked at you like this. And he said, yeah, I know what the issue is. And... because he has so much more experience and he'd been there, done that, been done the whole thing. He could point to me exactly where my issue was and had I simply asked for help sooner, I wouldn't have had to waste time. speaker-4: you speaker-0: Humbling, hey. Yeah, yeah. speaker-2: It's too often still. speaker-0: Thanks for me. Thank you. speaker-2: And I think quite similar to Femi, yeah. I'm a music manager or whatever, and I had a very successful year, but I didn't really consult God, to be honest with you. was just one after the other. There was a lot of like accomplishments, but it just kind of went, went, and it collapsed. Do you know what mean? And I just feel I didn't really ask God to be the head of my life, if that makes sense. you know, he needs to be the leader. And I kind of, you know, got carried away with the successes and all that stuff that I felt do with my power, if that makes sense. And God kind of reminded me very quickly. speaker-1: you speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-4: Thank you, thank you Sandy. speaker-3: Yeah. There you go. so I remember a couple years ago when I left my full-time job, it was when my presenting work started to really pick up. So I was doing both my day job and presenting at the same time, and I was like, right, I need to pick between one of the two. And I decided I was gonna quit my job without really a telling God, telling my family, I kind of did it on a whim, because I thought that okay, cool, the presenting work is now flowing, it's gonna continue to flow, and that well very much dried up so quickly, and then there was a period of just no work, and I was like why did I quit my job? Why did I go through all of this? And that could have just been avoided had I taken time to sit, to pray, to consult God and to actually think about what is the next step, what are the next steps, instead of just trying to Bull knows my way through life and do things by myself. But I think there is like an element of pride which I'm still trying to chip away at I guess might be like male ego and I want to get it done myself. But yeah, it doesn't work. It never will work. And it's something that I'm still working with. And yeah, I just gotta come before God with a bit more humility because you don't have it figured out at all. speaker-4: Yeah speaker-0: Thank you. Yeah, feel free to answer the first question, but just jumping off of Aure's question, what things do you find in yourself that makes you not ask for help? Could be it could be a lack of humility, it could be, I think I've actually got it together and I thought I could do this. It could be a multitude of reasons, but any reason that comes to mind that stops you for asking for help. speaker-2: Yeah, it comes up time and time again, but eldest daughter syndrome. I am the first born. And actually, yeah, I can do it. can do it. You will see me carrying six bags. You're OK. I can do it. It's fine. fine. guess, yeah, there wasn't. I'm not used to asking for help because I was the help. And when you're carrying everything, yes, now I have amazing people that are willing to help. But old habits die hard. actually, thankfully to God, he has helped me. My heart has softened and I'm willing to. pick up the bag, help me. But yeah, when you're used to doing that and always having to save, actually, yeah, you don't know how to ask for help. Shout out to all speaker-3: Yeah. speaker-2: the speaker-0: It is. speaker-4: Yeah speaker-5: I think sometimes it's like it's learned behaviour. So like I think for example speaker-2: Me growing up, witness was. speaker-5: like my mum doing things on her own and not asking for help or similarly with my dad like got quite self sufficient, quite independent. And I think growing up I just speaker-2: That was all you speaker-3: Like an easy. speaker-5: ended up following that routine. I think yeah growing up you realise like that's it's speaker-2: actually not healthy. speaker-5: not sustainable. so yeah it's like a learning process of trying to kind of get out of it. speaker-4: Yeah, speaker-0: And yeah, such a good point. speaker-4: Such a point. Yeah, girlfriend. speaker-1: you speaker-2: For me, it's one of those things I assume there's like a common shared knowledge that people have. Like I shouldn't ask for help because I'm supposed to know this. But I think one thing that's allowed me to ease into asking for help is knowing that I have a skill set that others are looking for. I know things that others don't know and they know things that I don't know. And hopefully if we communicate, we can move things forward instead of pretending that we know everything. So yeah, I don't know everything. And that's been part of my journey, humbling myself and asking the Holy Spirit as well. That's one thing I'm learning to do. And like you said, family just saves time. speaker-0: Absolutely. speaker-4: Yeah. speaker-5: So I think there is a level of fulfilment that comes when you've laboured for something and that fulfillment sometimes I feel like I personally go chasing that fulfillment. so I remember a couple of years ago I embarked on a renovation project. yeah. And my room. Okay to be, you know, work from home ready. Yeah. Right? And Yeah, I bit off a lot more than I could shoot, as you can imagine. but I did get to a point where, you know, everything was painted, I'd assembled all the things I needed to assemble except for the wardrobe. And the wardrobe was huge. So me as one man and the manual even says this is a two person call. And I And I'm like, does it really need to be two person? speaker-2: Jimmy, like, yeah. speaker-5: I'm looking at the pieces and I'm like, I could do this. You know, yeah, I couldn't do it from a good friend of mine, Josh, he yeah, he he kind of saw me struggling and was like, hey look man, I'm free. So yeah, me and Josh got it done together and at the end of it I was just as fulfilled as you know if I'd done it by myself. Yeah. Honestly. In fact, there was a bigger relief knowing that, okay I couldn't have done this by myself and now it's done and I can enjoy this lovely space. speaker-4: All speaker-0: That is so beautiful. That is so beautiful. And I love the illustration there of the manual is telling you one thing, and we're thinking, peace out, manual. Like, do know what I mean? I got this, I got this, I got one YouTube channel, and I'll be I'll be okay. And just that that leads me so perfectly into the Bible can be often seen as a manual, can't it? Like, this is the way to live, or this is the way to do this, or this is what pleases God. And so before we jump into the manual and see what yeah, Jesus has to say about help, whether you're a Christian, whether you're not a Christian around the table, what would you think? Think God would like to help you with? If someone says, God wants to help you, what do you think he, yeah, if if you if you've never come across a an idea like that, or maybe you are a Christian and God has helped you, when someone says, God wants to help you, what's the first thing that comes to mind that he may want to help you with? As well as building the wardrobes and the carrying the bags. But yeah, what would you think if someone said I'd like to share Jesus with you, he wants to help you, what do you think, yeah, what what would he like to help me about? speaker-2: I think for me, emotional regulation. You know, just helping me. Life is tough, you know what mean? You're going to get triggers every day. You're going to get people that are just opposite to how you think, know, different mindsets and just helping me regulate that. Do you know I mean? And not be... negative fruits, do you know what mean? And really carve my way to more of a positive, you know, reaction to life. so that would be mine. speaker-0: Yeah, love it. Me, I need to regulate all the emotions that are unregulated. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's good. Yeah, go. speaker-4: them. speaker-2: I've got a Well, my... speaker-3: One is everything. speaker-2: So basically, I think for a long time in my walk, I didn't realise that God wanted to be a part of my life as well as Lord of my life, if that makes sense. So I kind of felt like he was just someone that I talked to about the important things. But then when there are small things that were bothering me, I speaker-3: I just wouldn't all speaker-2: would talk to him because I'd be like, This is not a God situation. This is a Miriam. speaker-3: Fix the situation. speaker-2: And I remember. And. Relation of Holy Spirit is paracletos, which is. So Cretos is calling, so the Holy Spirit is called to be. Somebody speaker-3: And I had this image of speaker-2: who's just always next to me. speaker-3: And like what does that look like? speaker-2: Like if I need help with something really small, I would just ask the person next to me like, can you help me hold this bag? Or can you just hold this for me whilst I pick this thing up? And so just speaker-3: Yeah. speaker-2: the big things, but also the speaker-3: The small speaker-2: things as well. Yeah. speaker-4: Yeah, beautiful. Thank you. Thank you so much. speaker-0: Yeah, any other idea of what would God want to help me with? speaker-4: Yeah. speaker-5: I sorry to get philosophical, but part of my kind of walk was just the search for meaning. like everything can become quite meaningless without God in your life. And yeah, with Christ like a mill is not just a mill. It's it's it's an exercise of his grace, you know, his his provisions and and sustenance. And there's a much deeper meaning to everything when you're in Christ, really. I remember when I like left uni and felt accomplished and, you know, like I've done all the things that I was meant to do. but it was deeply empty and not much meaning to it all and you kind of I don't know, yeah, just don't appreciate how much is actually going on. I think for me, yeah, it's it's finding meaning, you know. speaker-4: Yeah, beautiful. speaker-0: Just going off of that, jumping into John 16, will you read with me from verse verse 4? I'll I'll read, but if you follow with me in your Bibles, verse 4, Jesus speaking says, I've said these things to you, so that when their hour comes, you may remember that I've told you about them. I did not say these things to you from the beginning because I was with you, but now I'm going to him who sent me, and none of you asked me, where are you going? But because I've said these things to you, sorrow has filled your hearts. Nevertheless I tell you the truth, it is to your advantage that I go away. For if I do not go away, the advocate, the Holy Spirit, will not come to you. But if I go, I will send him to you. And when he comes, this is what Jesus says, This is what I need to help you with. When he comes, he will prove the world wrong about sin and righteousness and judgment. Verse 9, about sin, because we because they do not believe in me, about righteousness, because I'm going to the Father and you will see me no longer, and about judgment, because the ruler of this world has been condemned. So of all the things that Jesus wants to help me with. I think before I became a Christian, I thought he just wanted to help me with I don't know my homework or or he wanted to help me with not feeling alone or insecure or different at school or my job, like Lord, I just need help with knowing what job I'm meant to do. But Jesus says, I'm actually trying to help you here see that your sin is what you need help with. Your your sin is what you need help with, you don't believe in me. So before I became a Christian, yeah, I didn't believe in God. I just kind of went about my life. I thought I was my own God. I'm Yas Queen. I'm my own queen of my life. Like I'm doing my own thing, I'm doing my own thing. And Jesus is saying, before your job, before your homework, before your whatever. You've got sin soaz, and your sin separates you from me, which means you can't bear fruit because you're not even in me. And the beauty of the gospel says, but I want to help you. I want to help you understand what sin is. All sin is. The beautiful thing about the language is sin is just about missing the mark. It's not some big height-y, courty thing. There's a target, and you've missed the mark. Completely missed the mark. And because we've missed the mark, which is perfection, actually, God says there's a there's a there's a judgment to that. That's there's there's things that we all Do we all miss the mark? We're impatient. We're I don't know, fill in the blank. You know your own heart. I don't think any of us would sit here and say, I'm perfect, I've hit the mark. But Jesus goes on to say, okay, you're wrong about your own sin. You think you've got it all together, Swells, that's wrong. And then he says, and about righteousness, verse 10, that I have. Hit the mark. Jesus could Jesus is the mark. He's the target. He's right on point. He never falls off. He never drops off. The call is be like me. And I know that I can't be like him. There's there's no way of being like him. And so he's actually saying, You need a helper. You need a helper. I feel like I broke a record, but I got caught shoplifting, and I think there was no better reason for me to call out to God to say, I can't help myself get out of this situation. I actually need help. And so My question off the back of what Jesus is saying, this is what I want to help you with, is when did you have a moment of I've completely missed the mark? I've missed the mark here. I I I've fallen off or or Or maybe you're sitting there thinking, No, I think I'm actually on mark, you know. I think Jesus is written the manual, is it a two man job? I don't know, Jesus. It's it's I don't know. Where are you on the side of verse nine and te ten here with Jesus saying, you know, the Holy Spirit wants to help you? have you missed the mark? Do you think you've missed the mark? and if you think you have missed the mark, what does what does Jesus' words here say to you about wanting to help you? yeah. Be on mark with him. Big question I know. Yeah, go, go, go for your speaker-4: Thank you. speaker-2: Is this like rated pg i need to talk talk okay i speaker-0: No no no, this is one hundred Yeah, yeah, keep it one hundred. speaker-2: just wanted to check before i put the mic to my mouth because yeah so sorry As soon as you asked that question, Swazil, I was like, I remember when I knew I completely missed the mark. Like it was in front of me and I did a 180 and aimed an arrow behind me. Like I couldn't have not been further from the mark. And it was for me my first year of uni and I like really enjoying my law degree. And I was like preparing to like go into exam season. speaker-4: you speaker-1: you speaker-2: And I was also sleeping with someone. And at the time, I knew that I knew it was wrong. And I knew that it wasn't what the Lord had for me. But I was just very stuck in this situation-ship. And it wasn't until I think. maybe just before exam season started, despite my best efforts to be careful, I ended up pregnant. And I decided that I wasn't going to keep the baby and had an abortion. And the aftermath that came from that, I don't think I could ever explain the darkness or the pain, not just like the physical pain from having the surgery, but like the emotional and mental and spiritual pain. And I was like really really really just in a dark space but thank thank like I give God so much thanks that there was a mentor in my life who was able to pull me out of the pit that I had dug for myself and when I realized like just going back to your previous question God helped God saved me from myself like when I think about what God wanted to help me with he literally helped me with becoming my true, like, who I am in Christ. And so to answer the question now, if I had not gone through that situation when I was 18, I don't think I'd be the Omic that I am today. But at the same time, I'm like, I know that God works all things together for good. And so now it's having the not feeling the shame and the guilt to share that testimony now to say that I did overcome because the Holy Spirit through my mentor and through the Holy Spirit in me brought me out of that darkness. And so that was my completely missing the mark point and yeah I'm like okay Lord I'll now do a 180 and I'll live for you like I will do whatever you want me to and I don't think I'd change anything about that. speaker-4: Amen. Amen. Thank you so much. Yeah. speaker-0: Thank you so much. I just I just want you might you might have never ever come to something like this and this might be your first time reading the Bible. I'm so glad that you shared that testimony, sis, and thank you so much for your honesty. Jesus is I believe Jesus is here in the form of his Holy Spirit and He's out for anyone who needs help. There there isn't this level of like once I get here then ask for help or I'm so far gone, I'm so far off the mark, I could never be helped by God. And so I just wanna, yeah, preface the conversation. I should have said that at the start, but yeah, just as I've been thinking through, praying through, Jesus sat with people who even the people at his time were like, What are you doing having dinner with people who've done that? And Jesus is like, Yeah, those are the people who I've come for. So make no mistake, if you're here today and you've maybe come off a whim or whatever, I feel like the Lord has actually personally invited you to be here. You know, so just yeah, nothing to say in response to that, but I just want you to know as I've been praying, I feel really like this table is the table for this chapter in John. and Jesus really is a friend of those who cry out to him in their moment of need. so yeah, any other stories of where you've completely missed the mark and just been like, my gosh, I need help. speaker-2: I wouldn't say a specific story, but guess it's, yeah, before coming to Christ, life was constant, missing the mark. But in His mercy, revealing that I have missed the mark, but Jesus Christ paid the price for that. actually, yeah, He's in me and helping me hit the target as close as possible. It's not going to be perfect in this body, but with His help, yeah, we can try and hit the mark. speaker-4: Amen, amen. Yeah. speaker-0: Beautiful. It's just fine, jumping off of Chinello's point, you know, Jesus speaking about righteousness and and he is that. John elsewhere says that Jesus was full of grace and full of truth. He was completely perfect. He is it's like if you stuff God into one person, you get Jesus Christ. What you see of Jesus is what you get of the Father. and so For the Christians in the room, what things have you overcome that actually you thought, before I was a Christian, I kept hitting this mark, hitting this mark. But God has helped me do this, or God has helped me do that. There's a fruit in my life that was never there before. And it and I can only say it's because God has birthed that in me or or created that in me because I couldn't have done that in my own strength. So continue with the first question of yeah, where do you where have you missed the mark or are you mindful of missing marks? But actually now that as a Christian you've you you know what it's like to have the Holy Spirit living inside of you, you've overcome something. any stories of things that you struggled with that now you're like, my gosh, I'm a completely new person. speaker-4: you speaker-2: For me, one thing I used to really struggle with was jealousy. Anytime God speaker-4: Mmm. speaker-2: blessed someone, was like... less for me. I had this idea that there's a limited amount of blessing in the world and every single time someone had a testimony about something I wanted, I felt like I'd missed out. And I've seen marked healing in that area. I'm so overjoyed now. Give me those engagement posts. Those wedding posts. Pregnancy things, new house, new... I actually feel so much joy and genuine joy, like just smiles over what no one looks like. So speaker-4: It smells speaker-2: no one thinks you're a hater. I'm genuinely so happy because it shows me there's a God in heaven. And he's doing good things all the time with people. And genuinely, genuinely, it could only have been him because it used to pain me. Like I'd be happy, but I'll just think I'll just be so hyper aware of what I don't have. I've seen healing in that area and it's a nice feeling. Do know what I used to have? When I speaker-4: Yeah. speaker-2: heard good news and what I have now, it's something only he's done and I'd say to my sister, my mum, I'm like, I love this. I love feeling like this. I love being free and he's still doing a work in me, but in this area, I just give him all the thanks. speaker-4: Amen. Amen. speaker-0: may I jump off your answer there as well actually. it's so funny. Just jump with me to well, the t the there's paragraphs and titles in our Bibles and one of the titles is called Sorrow Will Turn into Joy. I'm reading from verse sixteen. I would I'll just read real quick. a little while and you will s no longer see me, and again a little while you will see me. Then some of his disciples said to one another, What does he mean by saying to us, a little while and you'll no longer see me? A lot of the disciples are like, Jesus, what are you actually saying? Like, we don't get it. and Jesus says, verse 19, Jesus knew that they were asked, they wanted to ask him. So he said to them, Are you discussing among yourselves what I meant when I said, A little while and you will see me no longer? And a little while And you will see me very truly, I tell you, you will weep and mourn, but the world will rejoice. You will have pain, but your pain will turn into joy. speaker-4: you speaker-0: I work in a in a job that my fellow radio presenter will will also know. What the industry is just up and down all the time. It is for you one minute and not for you the next minute. And outside of radio, got some news actually. That I think before I was a Christian would have absolutely just rocked my world. I had a p a gig come through and the recruiter said to me, we actually got news that the recruiter doesn't want you anymore because you're too joyful. And I was just like, I'm too joyful. Like the the event is a is a joyful one actually. It's it's it's to do with kids and it's to do with storytelling. It's also to do with lovely things. And they were like, you're just too much. You're just too much. Like we we they just want you to tone it down and just be a little bit like vanilla. And if I heard that news before I was a Christian, I just my insecurity of I'm not enough. I'm gonna go and compare myself to everyone else who knows how to tone this thing down or I'm gonna look like everyone else. Or I'm gonna do everything I can do to not be me. And yet, as a Christian, the response I had was, my joy is Jesus Christ. He's dead and then he's alive, and now the grave is empty. I don't know what the appropriate response is other than other than joy. Yeah, absolute joy. And I think to your point of what God has healed me in is just that insecurity that I'm not enough, especially in a job or in a in an industry that is always saying, You need to be more like this girl, or you need to be less like this girl, or whatever it could be. Actually, to just know this is who the Lord has made me to be. And I do like to laugh and I do like the things I like and I like to talk about tea and I like if you don't want me, it's okay 'cause the Lord wants me. And I'm I'm okay with that. I'm actually okay with that. yeah, by God's grace. But the question of What yeah, same question, but anything that would have made you sad or would have heightened the sorrow or anything that actually, because you know God, it's actually turned to joy in the most unexpected incredible way. speaker-2: So back to the other question. I think mine was when I moved in, well, had a baby, moved in with my husband. So I moved far away from my family. Well, not too far, like 30 minutes drive, but it's still a bit far. And I was doing everything by myself. So I kind of felt it's like I was always looking for external help all the time. like I wake up thinking, I need help, need help. need help complaining to God, like, why hasn't no one come to help me? Why hasn't no one come to help me? And I think God was just like, I'm here to help. just embrace everything, take your time and I'm here to help. And then from then everything just started to feel lighter and not heavy. So yeah, I think that's one thing that God helps me with. speaker-4: Yeah, thank you. speaker-2: I think just back on the industry stuff, think when I mentioned before I had a really successful couple of years, I think pride and ego was a massive thing for me because you're surrounded by that in the industry that I'm in. speaker-3: No. speaker-2: Knowing God more, as of recent, he's actually instilled humility and gratitude. I didn't have enough of that. It was almost like one after the other, there wasn't any sense of stillness. was just like, when speaker-3: You know, but speaker-2: I look back, I'm like, like... There was a lot of moments there that you know you could have just stayed still and really be thankful and grateful that God chose you to embark that journey and also having a different perspective when negative things happen to me. Do you know what mean? It's no more for me now it's like this is a part of my story and there's a reason why God has placed me in this particular situation. It's not my life is messed up, comparing your life to others. It's like God ordains for things to happen to me and I just have to accept it and be thankful that it's gonna have a positive outcome. speaker-4: Yeah, thank you so much. speaker-3: Mm-hmm. to go back to the question earlier when you were asking what has God healed you from I'd actually say patience, you know, generalization, but I'm Nigerian and we Nigerians sometimes live life at a million miles per hour. Like my mum does this thing, it's like it's called sh shake shake sheke and it basically bees that hurry up, hurry up, hurry up. So instinctively from a very young age, I wasn't patient and that would actually affect a lot of my friendships, relationships, work relationships as well. And I think it was like maybe three or four years ago. I think God just laid it on my heart. I was just like, chill, bro. Like, literally just chill and relax. And now, genuinely, like, sometimes I'm a bit too slow, but so I'm like, I might need to pick up once again. And I think it actually really helped A with my friendships and my relationships, but it's allowed me to kind of like sit in a moment and not react with the first thing that comes to mind. Actually sit, pray, dwell. and then make whatever is the necessary step as opposed to just instinctively always reactively living in life and it's like you're not in control you're just being swayed by whatever direction the wind is blowing in whereas now I feel like I can definitely stand firm with more patience and then the decisions that are made are made with clarity. So yeah that's the one thing I definitely say God healed me from. speaker-4: Yeah, yeah. Thank you so much. speaker-1: you speaker-2: Thank you. So your most recent question was a situation that happens now that you would react differently to. Guys, when I tell you like wedding plan is not for the week. my lord, the things that God, I've realised how much God has like grown me in my character. So disappointment has been like a real thing this season and like people not showing up the way how I expected them to. And I think the old version of me, like even like pre-Christ or early Christ, I would be really insecure. People tell me they can't come anymore to like the hen do or the bride or the wedding and they haven't even got a good reason. It's just nonsense. Like that would really like make me look inwards and be like what's wrong with me? Why don't you want to come and support me? Because I know if the roles were reversed, I would go to the moon and back for you. So then I would expect that from people. And I think God has really taught me kind of similar to what you were saying, like things happen for a reason. And even though sometimes it can be I've learnt now to trust God even in that. Like, Romans 8.28 has been my... All things work together for good. Not some things, not some friends acting up, not some parents, like, making sarky comments, but, like, all things work together for good. And so I think if I was going through this season a couple... now, a couple years back, I don't know. I don't know, Hayes. I don't know. But because God has taught me how to not rely on people's opinions and rely on people showing up but to trust in him and to make him the foundation, it has like literally been my rock in the season and I'm so over the wedding planning. speaker-4: Yeah speaker-0: Thank you so much. Yeah, cool. speaker-1: you speaker-2: One thing in terms of we speaker-3: I want to add what speaker-2: react to differently is speaker-3: sin, in the sense of so I I grew up in the China think speaker-2: and I think it got to a point where I didn't realize that I had a lot of problems because speaker-3: Right. speaker-2: I grew up in the church, elder's daughter, Sunday school teacher, life and speaker-3: Leader How speaker-2: all these accolades and so I felt at a point that I thought I was like a girl. Like I'm not doing this and I'm this so that makes me a speaker-3: without realizing it like a good you know I'm doing this a really speaker-2: good Christian and I felt like any blessing that I had I'd sort of speaker-3: did speaker-2: because I've been you know I've been working I've been a teacher for over 10 years so you know that's why God has blessed me. speaker-0: I don't know God speaker-3: And not speaker-2: It's until I sort of fell off quite badly that I realized that you're speaker-3: Aye. speaker-2: never you're never that you're never that and it's And I think where I fell, it would crush me. I'd missed the mark and it would crush me because I felt like, gosh, I've done this and this is the sin that I've done because I'm not a good enough Christian. And it's not until I was really studying the world and realizing it was never me in the first place. Sin is a part of the human condition, but that's not an excuse to We still have to hold ourselves to righteousness, but it's through the of God and through the Holy Spirit's help. speaker-3: And so now to speaker-2: And so even if I do fall short, even if I miss the mark, I have the understanding that it's okay. speaker-3: It's speaker-2: Like God still loves me. God still sees me. And you just go back and just speaker-3: All I have to do is repent. speaker-2: ask him like, help me, help me through your standards, I know will help me be more like you. And so that's. speaker-4: Yeah, amen. speaker-0: before I ask my last question, just you reminded me of something I wonder if if you know some things about the Bible, who Jesus may even have in mind in verses 1 to 4 of John 16, real quick. He says, I've said these things to keep you from falling away. They will put you out of synagogues. Who who could he be thinking about? Who's putting you out of synagogues? Indeed, an hour is coming when those who will kill you, who's going about killing Christians, will think by doing so they're offering worship to God and they will do this because they have not known the Father or me. But I've said these things to you so that when their hour comes, you may remember that I've told you about them. there's many people in the Bible who, like you were saying, just yeah, w w in in church, just thinking that they were doing this stuff, and yet They were completely missing the mark. Someone called Saul was out here killing Christians, killing Christians, killing Christians. Jesus turns up and he's like, brother. Like, whoa, what's what's going on? And he, who thought he was so religious, so on top of the mark, had absolutely missed the mark. Who's Jesus talking to in this chapter? Matthew, a tax collector, someone who is who knows he's off the mark. He's he's out here doing his people dirty for the for the government, for this this UK no not the UK government, but whatever government, this government is doing He's got yeah, the Roman government. You've got Peter who i who is gonna very soon deny Jesus and and fall away. Jesus is talking to everyone who misses the mark. And it's true because the human nature is true that we all miss the mark. And so as I close, the question that Jesus asks his disciples after saying, You might miss the mark, but there's the Holy Spirit and me. I'm gonna He's on his way to the cross, in fact. This is such a beautiful passage. He's going to the cross, he's going to hit that mark of all marks, and the mark is gonna be between his hands and his feet, and he's gonna die on a cross, and he's gonna do all of that because all of us miss the mark, and then he's gonna rise again by the power of the Holy Spirit, so that those who put their trust in him will never have to, as you say, have to live with the shame or the guilt. Knowing that in Christ I'm righteous because of what Christ has done. And so in all of that, look what Jesus says as I close out. In verse 31 of John 16, Jesus answers them, Do you now believe? His offer is on the table, his invitation for help to you is available. And it's amazing that we don't even need to earn it, we don't need to do anything. It's free, it's a free gift of grace. and so yeah, as we close out, maybe you'll take that question home. Maybe some of the things that we've read. In fact, take this last bit home as well, John 16, verse 33. I've said this to you that in me you may have peace. In the world you face persecution. It will be hard. The Christian life is not an easy life. But he says, But take courage. He says, Cheer up, be of good cheer, give a good heart. I've overcome the world. I've conquered the world. and so whatever you are going through, if you think you're on the mark, miss the mark, he says. I've overcome it all. I'm about to go to a cross in a couple chapters time, spoiler alert. And he's gonna die and he's gonna rise again and he's gonna absolutely hit the mark for us. So yeah, why don't we close in prayer just as I'm finishing up with that chapter, take that question home. Do you now believe? Father God, we thank you so much for this evening. We thank you, Lord, for everyone in the room and to those who are watching online as well. We give you thanks that, Father, you know we need help. You know our frame. You know how weak we are. We we there are things that we want to do and we can't do them. And there's things we don't want to do and we don't know how to not do them, Lord. And Jesus, you say, Don't worry, when I go, there's a Holy Spirit who I'm gonna send to you who's exactly like me in every way. He's a helper. And Holy Spirit, would you help us? Would you help us to believe in Jesus Christ, to believe in his death, his resurrection, and that new life is found and found only in him? so thank you for all that you've taught us this evening, Lord. let us take home that question tonight. Do you now believe? Help us to say yes, we do believe in you. In Jesus' name I pray these things. Amen. speaker-4: . speaker-0: Amen. Amen.