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Navigating Work, Kids, and Content Creation: An Inside Look With Kelly Taylor, Better Know as Instagram Star - @kidsandthecommute · Work It Like A Mum

• 0:00
  Elizabeth Willetts: Hey, i'm Elizabeth Willits and I'm obsessed with helping as many women as possible achieve their boldest dreams after kids and helping you to navigate this messy and magical season of life.
• 0:13
  Elizabeth Willetts: I'm a working mum with over 17 years of recruitment experience and I'm the founder of the Investing in Women, job Board and Community.
• 0:22
  Elizabeth Willetts: In this show, i'm honored to be chatting with remarkable women redefining our working world across all areas of business.
• 0:29
  Elizabeth Willetts: They'll share their secrets on how they've achieved extraordinary success after children, set boundaries and balance, the challenges they've faced and how they've overcome them to define their own versions of success.
• 0:43
  Elizabeth Willetts: Shy away from the real talk?
• 0:44
  Elizabeth Willetts: no way.
• 0:45
  Elizabeth Willetts: Money struggles, growth, loss, boundaries and balance We cover it all.
• 0:49
  Elizabeth Willetts: Think of this as coffee with your mates the mixed with an inspiring TED talk sprinkled with the career advice you wish you'd really had at school.
• 0:57
  Elizabeth Willetts: So grab a cup of coffee or a glass of wine and make sure you cozy and get ready to get inspired and chase your boldest dreams, or just survive Mondays.
• 1:07
  Elizabeth Willetts: This is the Work It Like a Mum podcast.
• 1:10
  Elizabeth Willetts: This episode is brought to you by Taylor Francis, a global publishing company that believes in doing things differently.
• 1:18
  Elizabeth Willetts: Taylor Francis are looking for people with a variety of skills to help them grow and transform their internationally renowned business during an exciting time of change.
• 1:29
  Elizabeth Willetts: You'll help set the pace in the world of digital publishing and work with thousands of authors to make top quality research accessible to more people all around the world, and you don't have to have previous experience in publishing to do so.
• 1:44
  Elizabeth Willetts: In return, they can offer you excellent benefits, including a flexible work-life balance, great training and a fantastic place to work.
• 1:53
  Elizabeth Willetts: They have a wide range of roles in their editorial, production, marketing, commercial and technology teams.
• 2:00
  Elizabeth Willetts: So, whatever stage you're at in your career, start a journey of discovery and learn all about our many different career opportunities.
• 2:09
  Elizabeth Willetts: Find your next role at Taylor Francis, at TaylorandFranciscom forward slash careers.
• 2:16
  Elizabeth Willetts: Now back to the show.
• 2:20
  Elizabeth Willetts: Hello and welcome to this week's Work It Like a Mum podcast episode.
• 2:24
  Elizabeth Willetts: Today I'm delighted to chat with Kelly Taylor, a content creator, mum of two and media exec.
• 2:30
  Elizabeth Willetts: You may know her best by her Instagram handle, kids and the Commute.
• 2:33
  Elizabeth Willetts: When Kelly was coming back from her second maternity leave, she was filled with self-doubt and looked for accounts on social media dedicated to empowering working moms, which couldn't find any that resonated with her and her situation.
• 2:46
  Elizabeth Willetts: So she decided to create Kids and the Commute on Instagram with the promise to be authentic, supportive of others and always share both sides of working mum life.
• 2:57
  Elizabeth Willetts: Kelly now has almost 50,000 followers who enjoy her witty yet honest videos about the realities of working motherhood and parenting small children.
• 3:06
  Elizabeth Willetts: In today's episode, we're going to be talking about becoming the content creator, the inspiration behind her videos, the balance between private and online life, mum guilt work life balance, beige dinners, mum's cafe and, of course, commuting.
• 3:20
  Elizabeth Willetts: Thank you so much, Kelly, for joining me today.
• 3:24
  Kelly Taylor: I'm just listening to the list of like, how long is the podcast?
• 3:26
  Kelly Taylor: That's a lot, i know it is what I'm saying.
• 3:29
  Elizabeth Willetts: I'm such a fangirl because I've been following you for so long, so thank you so much.
• 3:35
  Elizabeth Willetts: Thank you, this is brilliant Your videos, if people.
• 3:38
  Elizabeth Willetts: I urge you now to pause this recording and go and follow Kelly on Instagram, because her videos are just fantastic.
• 3:44
  Elizabeth Willetts: There's a treasure trove and they will all make you laugh, particularly if you're a mum of small children.
• 3:48
  Elizabeth Willetts: But I think anybody will be able to relate that knows children, and some of them are quite poignant as well, because we were just talking about the ones you did in lockdown, which obviously were tough, and you said you were getting a lot of messages.
• 4:02
  Kelly Taylor: I think it's really important because when I first started the Instagram account, it was always about trying to make people laugh, trying to find kind of the light in those dark moments.
• 4:09
  Kelly Taylor: We've all been there.
• 4:10
  Kelly Taylor: You kind of feel that mum rage sometimes bubbling up and you're frustrated and what have you and you kind of I wanted to give some levity to people.
• 4:16
  Kelly Taylor: But at the same time, there are joyful moments, because the thing is, when you go through a period of creating content people messaging me going yeah, i think the decision to not have children is probably the right one I'm like, oh no, no, no, that's not what I know, that's not what I'm trying to do here, not what I'm trying to do at all.
• 4:35
  Kelly Taylor: So I wanted to kind of show some of the more poignant, some of the more thought provoking kind of videos that you can have and you know you mentioned the one in lockdown.
• 4:42
  Kelly Taylor: I mean lockdown, i think, for all of us, was particularly challenging in varying ways, especially for those of us that were working.
• 4:48
  Kelly Taylor: Everyone had got their challenges, but trying to work full-time with small children and not being able to have them and send them anywhere, was it's horrendous, absolutely horrendous.
• 5:01
  Kelly Taylor: I don't think there was a day for about the first six months I didn't cry.
• 5:04
  Kelly Taylor: It was just so ridiculously hard.
• 5:06
  Kelly Taylor: Now I remember one time being in a meeting I think it was my first leadership meeting at work and I was on Zoom in our spare room, which I tried to make Mummy's office, thinking if I shut the door they wouldn't come in.
• 5:17
  Kelly Taylor: That didn't work and our spare bed was next to us and I'm trying it.
• 5:22
  Kelly Taylor: The team are all giving their little chats and updates about what they're up to and it's coming closer and closer to me and the girls burst through the door, they jump on the bed and they're just jumping on the bed and they're laughing and giggling.
• 5:32
  Kelly Taylor: They're as happy as Larry and I'm sitting here thinking, oh my god, it's gonna be my turn to talk in a minute and I'm gonna turn on.
• 5:38
  Kelly Taylor: Do you have your camera off at that point?
• 5:40
  Kelly Taylor: No, no, i've got a blood background sound on and I'm doing that thing where I'm like, yeah, go away, stop, stop, stop, stop.
• 5:49
  Kelly Taylor: Hey, you're listening.
• 5:50
  Kelly Taylor: Yes, you know, i'm muting yourself.
• 5:52
  Kelly Taylor: Yes, i'm listening, i'm listening, you're stuck to it.
• 5:54
  Kelly Taylor: Anyway, a camera came on to me and I went to talk and my voice just broke.
• 5:59
  Kelly Taylor: And I'm sorry, guys, i can't do this and I just cut the call and I got my boss immediately kind of, what's happening me going, are you okay?
• 6:06
  Kelly Taylor: what's going on?
• 6:08
  Kelly Taylor: what's going on.
• 6:08
  Kelly Taylor: I can't do it, i can't do it.
• 6:10
  Kelly Taylor: I don't know how I'm going to get through this and at the time we didn't know how long we were gonna be in it.
• 6:16
  Kelly Taylor: And then, slowly but surely, you start to find different ways to make it work.
• 6:22
  Kelly Taylor: The children get used to you being at work.
• 6:26
  Kelly Taylor: They're still interrupting you, but actually you realise that everybody's in the same boat and you don't need to pretend it's all okay, because it's not.
• 6:33
  Kelly Taylor: And the more you.
• 6:35
  Kelly Taylor: I was open and honest with my colleagues about I'm finding this really challenging.
• 6:38
  Kelly Taylor: I was also in a leadership role, so I've got members of my team who've got young children as well, so I'm realised I have a responsibility to role model for them as well.
• 6:46
  Kelly Taylor: And in the end we got to the point where we're like right, has anyone got a small person who wants to show a picture in the meeting?
• 6:51
  Kelly Taylor: does anyone have someone who wants to come on and join the call?
• 6:53
  Kelly Taylor: and we all got to the point where we were just having meetings where our kids were there, but our calls weren't Disneyland to our kids anymore because they were done with it.
• 7:02
  Kelly Taylor: Oh god, mum's on another call again.
• 7:04
  Kelly Taylor: I'm bored with this now.
• 7:06
  Kelly Taylor: So it became a lot easier, but that was when my Instagram account really became what it is now, because before I think I was trying to show an element of perfectionism that actually didn't exist.
• 7:19
  Kelly Taylor: It was that kind of look my kitchen's clean as I scrape everything to one side and look at my lovely, clean outfit that's actually got a little mucky prints all over the back, which you can't see because of the anger.
• 7:30
  Kelly Taylor: I'm taking the photo and I was being a little bit disingenuous.
• 7:32
  Kelly Taylor: And then one day I'd had a really rough day and I just took a photo of me trying to be on a phone, cook a dinner, write an email.
• 7:42
  Kelly Taylor: Kids were on me and I captured that photo and I posted it and it just went bonkers, with everyone going yep, yep, this is exactly how it is and I thought, okay, i'm going to turn up as myself and I'm going to be really honest.
• 7:54
  Kelly Taylor: I started talking very openly and honestly just about the challenges I was having.
• 7:56
  Kelly Taylor: It was ridiculous because, as working moms, we have everything really in different compartments, don't we?
• 8:02
  Kelly Taylor: We've got our home, we've got work, we've got friends, we've got being partners where we are, and you separate it In lockdown, the walls of your home became the walls of your office.
• 8:13
  Kelly Taylor: There were no boundaries, there was no transitioning between whatever role you've got.
• 8:18
  Kelly Taylor: Everything just came crashing in on us.
• 8:20
  Kelly Taylor: Everyone just went it's too hard.
• 8:22
  Kelly Taylor: And you felt you were the only one that it was too hard, for The reality was there were literally millions, millions of others having exactly the same struggle.
• 8:33
  Kelly Taylor: I thought I owe it to myself.
• 8:34
  Kelly Taylor: To be honest, i owe it to other people, to be honest.
• 8:36
  Kelly Taylor: This is hard.
• 8:39
  Kelly Taylor: But then, when that conversation started and everyone started to be honest, i felt a weight lift off, another's messaging me going I'm not failing, this is normal.
• 8:49
  Kelly Taylor: It shouldn't be, but this is normal and it's okay.
• 8:52
  Kelly Taylor: And then people were swapping tips and advice about how do you work from home with kids, how do we handle it?
• 8:56
  Kelly Taylor: Technology finally started to catch up with us And there were better ways in which we could interface with colleagues and remote working and yada, yada, yada.
• 9:04
  Kelly Taylor: And then fast forward to now And all of a sudden, if anything that was positive to come out of lockdown, it's flexible working, i know, but all of a sudden we are now reaping the benefits of being able to work at home much more, be much more present for our kids and find that balance, unless they're commuting.
• 9:22
  Elizabeth Willetts: That's obviously When you started the account, were you commuting, oh my god.
• 9:27
  Kelly Taylor: But yeah, that's no.
• 9:27
  Kelly Taylor: It's funny I was having a coffee with friends this morning and we were talking about that that my routine before the pandemic was somehow I had to get the kids up, dressed and fed before I dropped them off at the childminders at seven o'clock in the morning to then go and catch a quarter past 20, past seven train to get to work, to then do a full day's work, to then finish around 4.30 to leg it sweating, bags, the lot, onto a train, get on the mum train, as we used to call it, to Waterloo because it was filled literally with mums or legging it back to go and pick their kids up from childcare.
• 10:10
  Kelly Taylor: But at the same time, on emails, still taking calls when the signal would allow, you're still working the entire way through your commute.
• 10:17
  Kelly Taylor: When you're in the underground, you're sending email.
• 10:20
  Kelly Taylor: You're writing email so that when the signal kicks in they're sending off as soon as you're there.
• 10:24
  Kelly Taylor: Go and pick my kids up, do bath time, do whatever I need to do, have the usual when they just fall apart on you, which is great.
• 10:32
  Kelly Taylor: You're knackered at the end of the day.
• 10:33
  Kelly Taylor: You pick your kids up, they fall apart on you.
• 10:34
  Kelly Taylor: That's restraints collapse, i believe is the phrase, i know what it is.
• 10:40
  Kelly Taylor: It doesn't help it anymore.
• 10:41
  Kelly Taylor: And then you put them to bed and then turn your laptop back on again to pick up on your work.
• 10:47
  Kelly Taylor: And it was that continually And I was burnt out and I was overwhelmed and I was exhausted and I never realised, because it was normalised, because you're on a treadmill.
• 10:57
  Elizabeth Willetts: You are, you're literally there.
• 10:58
  Elizabeth Willetts: It's only when you get off, actually you think, oh my God, do I want to get back on that?
• 11:02
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, and it was that.
• 11:04
  Kelly Taylor: And I couldn't work out why I was so tired.
• 11:06
  Kelly Taylor: I couldn't work out why I had no time for exercise and no energy for exercise.
• 11:10
  Kelly Taylor: I was irritable, i had no energy, i was just snapping at people, i didn't have the energy to deal with the kids.
• 11:18
  Kelly Taylor: When you know, i could barely handle my own emotions and I was also having to regulate the emotions the children And you just feel like you're failing in every, every aspect of your life, because when you're at work, you don't feel that you've got enough energy to concentrate and do what you need to do there, and then, when you're at home, you're exhausted.
• 11:37
  Kelly Taylor: So you feel like you're failing there.
• 11:38
  Kelly Taylor: And it was horrid actually, if I look back now, absolutely horrid.
• 11:41
  Kelly Taylor: But the pandemic taught a lot of people, i think, about priorities.
• 11:45
  Kelly Taylor: It taught a lot of us that you know life really is too short And actually, what is it that we want to focus on?
• 11:51
  Kelly Taylor: Well, what's important to us, to be honest?
• 11:54
  Kelly Taylor: And actually, is there another way that we could potentially be doing this?
• 11:57
  Kelly Taylor: It was an utter disruptor, but a disruptor in a positive sense, that it made people stop and go.
• 12:02
  Kelly Taylor: I think there's another way.
• 12:03
  Kelly Taylor: I really think we could do this another way.
• 12:06
  Kelly Taylor: And here we are now with not only we have we got flexible working, but you've got people now going not beyond compressed hours.
• 12:13
  Kelly Taylor: You've got people now talking about doing not a five day week but a four day week.
• 12:17
  Elizabeth Willetts: Yeah, and that normal.
• 12:18
  Elizabeth Willetts: And also I've seen about, just as an author working visa.
• 12:22
  Elizabeth Willetts: I think that Spain have introduced where people that you know, digital nomads, can go work abroad.
• 12:26
  Elizabeth Willetts: I think, God, yeah, you know, if you didn't have the kids, I'd be there, I'd be working in Barcelona.
• 12:31
  Kelly Taylor: And that that's the incredible thing.
• 12:32
  Kelly Taylor: Now I mean with remote working, i mean there were so many people that there was mass exodus from the cities because people are like, well, i don't need to be in the office every single day.
• 12:39
  Kelly Taylor: So actually, what do I want my life to look like?
• 12:42
  Kelly Taylor: Do I want to move out to the country?
• 12:44
  Kelly Taylor: Because if I've only got to commute to the office one day a week and I can still be just as effective, isn't that better for me?
• 12:50
  Kelly Taylor: And actually, people aren't necessarily having to work the longer hours, because when you'd be sitting at your commute, you're actually flicking on your computer and you're starting working.
• 13:00
  Kelly Taylor: I still do miss my commute, i'm not going to lie.
• 13:03
  Elizabeth Willetts: What were you doing?
• 13:04
  Elizabeth Willetts: So you obviously doing your work on the commute.
• 13:05
  Elizabeth Willetts: What else were you doing on the commute?
• 13:07
  Elizabeth Willetts: Is that when you started doing the video, you started getting the ideas for the videos on the commute?
• 13:11
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, i think it was.
• 13:12
  Kelly Taylor: I think it was.
• 13:12
  Kelly Taylor: I mean, i like my commute.
• 13:14
  Kelly Taylor: I'm a weirdo, i know I didn't really like the kind of the rushing to get to it, but once I was on it, I've always found the commute was this great time to transition into whatever role you were going into.
• 13:24
  Kelly Taylor: So, whether you were transitioning from the home into work or then back again, whether you're transitioning from working to home, there was just that time and space where it was actually yours And no one's asking anything of you at all.
• 13:37
  Kelly Taylor: Work weren't asking anything of you.
• 13:38
  Kelly Taylor: It was your time to do as you wished.
• 13:40
  Kelly Taylor: If you wish to answer emails, or if you wish to kind of tee yourself up for the next day from a work perspective, you absolutely could.
• 13:46
  Kelly Taylor: If you wanted to do the Sainsbury's online shop the other things you want, because they're available, you could absolutely do that.
• 13:53
  Kelly Taylor: Or if you just wanted to sit and read, if you wanted to watch a film, or if you just wanted to stare blankly out of the window and decompress because the strain was absolutely fried, you could do that, but it felt like it was the only time in a day that it was my time to do so.
• 14:09
  Kelly Taylor: That is one of the challenges now with working from home.
• 14:12
  Elizabeth Willetts: So what do you do now then?
• 14:13
  Elizabeth Willetts: So how do you get that time?
• 14:15
  Elizabeth Willetts: How do you go from kid be the mom to be in at?
• 14:18
  Kelly Taylor: work.
• 14:19
  Kelly Taylor: Not as well as I should.
• 14:20
  Kelly Taylor: I am very good at preaching to other people that they should be doing it.
• 14:23
  Kelly Taylor: Do I follow my own rules?
• 14:25
  Kelly Taylor: Not always.
• 14:25
  Kelly Taylor: no, i'm getting better at it and I'm trying to find that time where, if the girls are coming home about six o'clock, my other half is very hands on.
• 14:34
  Kelly Taylor: Daddy's amazing and he does a lot of the pick up and drop offs.
• 14:36
  Kelly Taylor: So when he goes to go and pick the girls up, i try to be offline and I try to do something that gives me that kind of headspace.
• 14:46
  Kelly Taylor: When the girls come home, i'm like I'm ready for whatever.
• 14:49
  Elizabeth Willetts: I'm about to open the door to You know, because sometimes you can open the door and it's like it's like, yeah, you've had a brilliant day.
• 14:54
  Kelly Taylor: It's amazing.
• 14:55
  Kelly Taylor: Another time It's like, oh, i don't know, i forgot the energy, for this is one of those.
• 15:00
  Kelly Taylor: You don't know what's coming through the door, but I try and be prepared for it.
• 15:02
  Kelly Taylor: If I can, i'll go for a run just again to try and transition between the two, but invariably I'll be completely frank with you and working up until the doorbell goes, i am literally like I just need to get the email sent, i just need to do this, i just need to do that, and I need to get better at not doing that, because I notice my mood.
• 15:19
  Kelly Taylor: I really notice that I don't have the headspace and they come in and I'm not really that present for them, because I'm thinking, oh, i kind of needed to do that thing and I haven't done it yet.
• 15:28
  Elizabeth Willetts: It's a hard thing, though, isn't it, and that is something I suffer from, and, i'm sure, a lot of people.
• 15:33
  Elizabeth Willetts: You try to be with them, but it's in your head You are doing that.
• 15:36
  Elizabeth Willetts: Oh, i need to do this, i need to dance.
• 15:38
  Elizabeth Willetts: Sometimes it's not even work things.
• 15:39
  Elizabeth Willetts: Sometimes I need to do the online job I need to do.
• 15:41
  Elizabeth Willetts: It's the mental load.
• 15:42
  Kelly Taylor: It's the mental load that we carry, and I'm really glad that that conversation has come to the forefront recently And people are talking a lot more about the mental load.
• 15:50
  Kelly Taylor: You know, it's silly little things like the kids have got a party at the weekend.
• 15:54
  Kelly Taylor: Haven't got the present.
• 15:55
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, who's buying the present?
• 15:57
  Kelly Taylor: Who's wrapping the present?
• 15:59
  Kelly Taylor: Have we got a card?
• 16:00
  Kelly Taylor: Who's going to be taking them?
• 16:01
  Kelly Taylor: Who's going to be picking them up?
• 16:03
  Kelly Taylor: At what point in the day is this And was I planning on doing something?
• 16:06
  Kelly Taylor: and now can I not do that thing?
• 16:07
  Kelly Taylor: You know, what are they wanting to wear?
• 16:09
  Kelly Taylor: Because, let's be frank as well, i don't know if anyone's kids are like mine, but they have this idea of what they want to wear.
• 16:14
  Kelly Taylor: And then that no, i don't want to wear that, i want to wear this, i want to wear that, and they've got seven outfit changes to cope with as well.
• 16:19
  Kelly Taylor: There's just a lot that's going on in your head, but that's just one tiny thing that you've got to think about for that weekend.
• 16:25
  Kelly Taylor: There's all the other stuff that's going on, and then you know you might have multiple parties that you're juggling that weekend And you know you're playing rock paper scissors with your other half as to who's taking who and when, and when they're going to fit their exercise time in.
• 16:37
  Kelly Taylor: When you're going to fit your exercise time in.
• 16:39
  Kelly Taylor: When do I get that time at the weekend when I can just not be with any of you as much as I love you, but we all need space for ourselves.
• 16:45
  Kelly Taylor: You know, when are we going to do that?
• 16:46
  Kelly Taylor: And it's that.
• 16:47
  Kelly Taylor: I mean, i find myself at home sometimes.
• 16:50
  Kelly Taylor: I'm the telly's on and I'm sitting on the sofa, kids are in bed and I'm triple screening because I'm doing an online shop.
• 16:57
  Kelly Taylor: I've also realized that the kids have had a growth spurt, so I need to order some dresses and more school dresses that need to come in.
• 17:03
  Kelly Taylor: Oh, that's that work thing.
• 17:04
  Kelly Taylor: I didn't think I need to sort it.
• 17:05
  Kelly Taylor: I can't need to get done.
• 17:06
  Kelly Taylor: Someone's WhatsApping mean in the various WhatsApp groups, because I'm also on the PTA at school, so there's various things going on.
• 17:12
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, and I'm a class rep, so there's all those things.
• 17:15
  Kelly Taylor: You kind of got all these different responsibilities.
• 17:18
  Kelly Taylor: You kind of dealing with it at the same time and I'm sitting there and then I go to bed and I'm like, oh my God, why am I so tired?
• 17:22
  Kelly Taylor: And it's like because at what point did you just stop?
• 17:26
  Kelly Taylor: You didn't because there's just so many other things going on in your head of what it is that you need to be doing.
• 17:32
  Kelly Taylor: I don't think, and as and as moms especially, we don't stop.
• 17:35
  Kelly Taylor: I don't think anyone can think of a time when they've just gone.
• 17:37
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, i just sat and I read a book and all I did was think about that book.
• 17:41
  Kelly Taylor: Not at all, and it's, it's hard.
• 17:43
  Kelly Taylor: It is hard when that's kind of on there And, as I say, i've got a very, very hands on partner.
• 17:47
  Elizabeth Willetts: Yeah, you've got busy.
• 17:48
  Kelly Taylor: I mean, talk to us What's your week look like now then with work, and what's your working pattern like since so I do compressed hours, which means that I work five days worth of work into four days Ultimately Thursdays Yeah, thursdays of my day.
• 18:02
  Kelly Taylor: So basically I do two additional hours per day on those four days.
• 18:06
  Kelly Taylor: Ultimately work are very good at the fact that my commute, when I am going in, still classes as my work time, because I am still contactable, i am still available, i am still emailing and what have you.
• 18:17
  Kelly Taylor: So they've been very good about that.
• 18:18
  Kelly Taylor: But I think, if I'm honest and I'll probably ever step the mark here, i think all businesses should.
• 18:22
  Kelly Taylor: I don't understand why they don't.
• 18:23
  Kelly Taylor: I don't understand work.
• 18:27
  Kelly Taylor: I think, again, with flexible working, work is the moment you are available to answer something.
• 18:31
  Kelly Taylor: Now, if you want to just say I'm commuting from 7.30, that is my time, i'm not answering emails, i'm not available, i'm not even thinking about work, absolutely fine, that's not when you start work.
• 18:40
  Kelly Taylor: I start work the moment I start thinking about work.
• 18:42
  Kelly Taylor: That's how I've always looked at it.
• 18:44
  Kelly Taylor: If I'm trying to solve a problem that I've got to come into the office to deal with, i've started work because I'm trying to get a head start on what I'm about to hit as soon as I hit the office.
• 18:53
  Kelly Taylor: It shouldn't be about presenteeism.
• 18:56
  Kelly Taylor: It shouldn't be.
• 18:58
  Kelly Taylor: If I can see you, you're working.
• 18:59
  Kelly Taylor: No, i'm still trying to work out that thing I need to deal with, or an agenda that I'm trying to write or a presentation that's coming up or whatever it may be.
• 19:07
  Kelly Taylor: So if my head's in that space I'm working And work have been great at kind of acknowledging that, and I do it with my team and anyone that will listen.
• 19:13
  Kelly Taylor: Ultimately, that is kind of how a working practice should be.
• 19:16
  Kelly Taylor: So the girls and Ian and I have always been very good at making sure that one of us is always at home, so neither of us are working in town on the same day.
• 19:27
  Kelly Taylor: So if I'm in the office, he will take the girls to school and vice versa.
• 19:31
  Kelly Taylor: Or, to be honest, the majority of the time we both take the girls to school.
• 19:34
  Elizabeth Willetts: That's nice.
• 19:34
  Elizabeth Willetts: You got about a bit of time for you two as well.
• 19:37
  Kelly Taylor: Well, yeah, i mean, we have demanding jobs that are in town.
• 19:39
  Kelly Taylor: They're in London and it got to a point where neither one of us was able to do the school run for literal years, and now we've got this really nice setup where we can both take the girls to school, grab a coffee and then walk home together, which is really nice.
• 19:55
  Kelly Taylor: So we kind of have that, which is a really nice kind of way to start up.
• 19:57
  Kelly Taylor: You say it the same for parents.
• 19:59
  Kelly Taylor: I just feel like that actually, i mean the majority of the time we're talking about them and normally what a nightmare they've been on the school run or trying to get them out the door.
• 20:05
  Kelly Taylor: But you know it's still ours.
• 20:08
  Kelly Taylor: So my working days are Monday, tuesday, wednesday, day off, thursday, working Friday They go to a childminders after school until six o'clock.
• 20:16
  Kelly Taylor: Monday through to Wednesday Thursdays I'm not working so I can pick them up and then Fridays, grandma or granddad go and pick them up from school.
• 20:25
  Kelly Taylor: So we call upon the village to pick them up from school And that's how we've worked it And it's worked really nicely for a long time.
• 20:32
  Kelly Taylor: But again, we couldn't have done something like that.
• 20:36
  Kelly Taylor: It's funny actually that my working pattern hasn't really changed in terms of my hours, even pre-pandemic and post-pandemic.
• 20:43
  Kelly Taylor: It's just all the other bits that fit into like what does childcare have to look like now?
• 20:47
  Kelly Taylor: Do we need wrap around care?
• 20:49
  Kelly Taylor: You know the kids have gone from being at nursery to now being at school, so that is very different to kind of the care that is provided and how long they're needed for.
• 20:57
  Kelly Taylor: And then after school, clubs And then all the other stuff that kind of comes in and you like trying to drug or that.
• 21:01
  Kelly Taylor: And then also there is the guilt that kicks in because, mummy, why can't you come and read in class?
• 21:06
  Kelly Taylor: Because all the other mums come and read in class with me, or you know, why can't you come on this school trip, mummy, why don't we have play dates?
• 21:13
  Kelly Taylor: Why can't we have people back at our house?
• 21:15
  Kelly Taylor: And the reality is the only day we can ever have play dates is a Thursday, because that's the only time I'm picking them up from school to bring them and their friends home.
• 21:22
  Kelly Taylor: It's like you can't.
• 21:23
  Kelly Taylor: I don't think your child mind would very much like you having a play date back at their house.
• 21:27
  Kelly Taylor: That's not how this works.
• 21:28
  Kelly Taylor: So you know you are constantly just trying to working.
• 21:32
  Kelly Taylor: Motherhood is a series of trade-offs and compromises.
• 21:34
  Kelly Taylor: I'll be honest, i don't really like the term balance because I don't think we ever gain any level of balance, because every day is different, every hour is different, every month is different, every week is different.
• 21:43
  Kelly Taylor: I think it's just what you're willing to trade off and compromise at any particular period of time.
• 21:49
  Kelly Taylor: You know, sometimes I'm full on in work mode, which means I can't be full on in mum mode.
• 21:54
  Kelly Taylor: Sometimes I'm full on in mum mode, which means I can't be full on in work mode, and sometimes there's time that's just for me not being the mum and I'm not at work.
• 22:03
  Elizabeth Willetts: And I'm just trying to figure out who I am Because, again, you get to work, do you review the Instagram channel is sort of that time for you, then.
• 22:09
  Elizabeth Willetts: Is that you?
• 22:10
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, i do, i do.
• 22:11
  Kelly Taylor: I think I've always been a storyteller, always ever since I was teeny tiny.
• 22:16
  Kelly Taylor: I'm a talker, i do like to chat And I just I've always loved telling stories.
• 22:21
  Kelly Taylor: I've always loved being creative And, to be honest, my Instagram account was therapy.
• 22:26
  Kelly Taylor: During lockdown.
• 22:27
  Kelly Taylor: I wasn't thinking about.
• 22:29
  Elizabeth Willetts: You didn't start it much before.
• 22:31
  Elizabeth Willetts: Before did you lockdown really.
• 22:33
  Kelly Taylor: No, i was 2019,.
• 22:35
  Kelly Taylor: I started it Because a friend of mine was on Instagram and you know she actually was the one that encouraged me.
• 22:41
  Kelly Taylor: Sarah Insuri, give her a call out.
• 22:45
  Elizabeth Willetts: Oh well, give her Sarah Insuri, i'll follow her.
• 22:48
  Kelly Taylor: She's one of my best friends.
• 22:49
  Kelly Taylor: I've known her for a long time And she encouraged me to close down my personal Instagram account and to actually start a public facing one and do kids in the commute.
• 22:59
  Kelly Taylor: Ultimately, in fact, she brainstormed the name with me as we were walking back from a coffee morning one time Because I was complaining, as you kind of said in the intro, that I didn't see working motherhood that was my reality being represented on Instagram.
• 23:11
  Kelly Taylor: I saw kind of a lot of kind of like boss mums who were absolutely smashing it.
• 23:16
  Elizabeth Willetts: And you see them actually at work, don't you?
• 23:18
  Elizabeth Willetts: And they're the ones you know with the full time nannies and high flying.
• 23:23
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, and it's absolutely incredible And I'm like I don't know how you do this.
• 23:27
  Elizabeth Willetts: And they come in blow.
• 23:28
  Elizabeth Willetts: Look amazing, don't they?
• 23:29
  Kelly Taylor: Suited, booted, smashing it, you know, can take the trips abroad.
• 23:34
  Kelly Taylor: You know, because you say their childcare setup is different And that's ultimately the key to it, Like if your childcare setup is a really solid one and incredibly flexible.
• 23:43
  Kelly Taylor: You know, some incredibly senior people have got live in nannies.
• 23:47
  Kelly Taylor: So if all of a sudden they're called into a meeting and they need to take a call that's later on because they're working with the US and the, you know they can take those calls, they can do all of that.
• 23:56
  Kelly Taylor: That wasn't my reality.
• 23:57
  Kelly Taylor: My reality was literally sitting at my desk at 3.30, going please, no one call me into a meeting.
• 24:01
  Kelly Taylor: Please, no one call me into a meeting.
• 24:02
  Kelly Taylor: Please, no one call me into a meeting.
• 24:03
  Kelly Taylor: Because you're constantly thinking I've got to go and catch the train And I've got to think at what point do I need to pack up, and you can see someone coming to your desk and you're going no, no, don't make eye contact, and then they'll go away.
• 24:12
  Kelly Taylor: And then people would arrive at your desk and you'd be like I don't want to take you, i've got to go in 10 minutes, but I have to go in 10 minutes because I have to pick my kids up, and that would make you feel, i don't know, whatever guilt is the right word, but I'd start to kind of question how valuable I was as an employee, because I'd be like I'm constantly thinking I've got to go home.
• 24:31
  Kelly Taylor: And then again I realized I had a responsibility to role model, because at the time I looked around my department and when you are the most senior member of staff, who was a working mum, and you absolutely need to show people how to behave and to give people permission to make it easier for them ultimately And what used to happen is I'd be at my desk, i'd be kind of quietly looking at the clock and I'm thinking, right, i can't need to go in five minutes And you'd sneak out Oh my God, yeah, quietly gathering my stuff, putting it in my bag, so no one could see what I was doing, pretending I was still working and gathering my stuff, and I put my bag back on and I quietly go see you all tomorrow, and then I'd leave.
• 25:11
  Kelly Taylor: I'd leave really quietly And I was almost ashamed, hiding the fact I was still going home, i was still logging on once the kids had gone to bed and doing all that work, but no one was seeing that.
• 25:22
  Kelly Taylor: So I was, you know.
• 25:24
  Kelly Taylor: And then you get the oh, part timer, you know little comments that would come through.
• 25:27
  Kelly Taylor: I just thought what are you doing?
• 25:29
  Kelly Taylor: You have nothing to be ashamed of.
• 25:31
  Kelly Taylor: You are brilliant at your job.
• 25:32
  Kelly Taylor: You're fantastic at time management.
• 25:35
  Kelly Taylor: You have to be, you know.
• 25:37
  Kelly Taylor: This is ridiculous.
• 25:39
  Kelly Taylor: So then I've gone completely opposite.
• 25:40
  Kelly Taylor: I pack my stuff up, right, i'm going.
• 25:43
  Kelly Taylor: I literally stand up And I'm like, right, right, i say goodbye to everyone in the office, i make it very clear that I'm going.
• 25:48
  Kelly Taylor: I will go into meetings now and I'll be very clear and say guys, i've got a hard stop at whatever I've got a hard stop at because I have to go and get the kids.
• 25:55
  Kelly Taylor: And I'm very clear, people say, oh, are you able to make that meeting?
• 25:58
  Kelly Taylor: That's how I'm like no, i'm really sorry, i can't, because I've got to go and pick the girls up from school.
• 26:02
  Kelly Taylor: But people don't go.
• 26:03
  Kelly Taylor: Oh, that's really inconvenient.
• 26:06
  Kelly Taylor: People go oh God, yeah, i completely get that.
• 26:08
  Kelly Taylor: I had to go get money the other week And it's just I don't know.
• 26:11
  Kelly Taylor: Let's normalize it.
• 26:12
  Kelly Taylor: That was my big key.
• 26:13
  Kelly Taylor: Can we please just normalize the fact that we have other things going on?
• 26:18
  Kelly Taylor: What always gets my go, she says, getting on a soapbox is when you employ somebody, you don't just employ the employee, if that makes sense.
• 26:29
  Kelly Taylor: You don't just employ the person who's turning up for work for you, you employ the entire person.
• 26:36
  Kelly Taylor: Okay, and that entire person has got other things going on outside of being in work, and I'm not just talking about parents, i'm talking about anybody.
• 26:45
  Kelly Taylor: We have got so much else going on.
• 26:47
  Kelly Taylor: If, for some reason, someone is grumpy in work, it doesn't necessarily mean they're grumpy about something that's happened at work.
• 26:54
  Kelly Taylor: They could have something else going on in their personal lives And I think businesses have just got to get better.
• 26:59
  Kelly Taylor: Managers, leaders, have got to get better at understanding.
• 27:03
  Kelly Taylor: I've employed the whole person and I need to acknowledge that.
• 27:07
  Kelly Taylor: I need to acknowledge that people have got caring responsibilities.
• 27:10
  Kelly Taylor: I need to acknowledge that people have got health and wellbeing that they need to maintain outside of work or even inside of work hours controversial, going for a run at three o'clock in the afternoon because that's what they need to do in order to either do their job or maybe they finish their deadlines for that day, and that's absolutely fine.
• 27:28
  Kelly Taylor: Just, i don't know.
• 27:29
  Kelly Taylor: It really gets my go, and I would have conversations sometimes with people at work.
• 27:32
  Kelly Taylor: Who would like?
• 27:33
  Kelly Taylor: yeah, i don't really like this whole working from home thing.
• 27:35
  Kelly Taylor: I'm like mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
• 27:37
  Kelly Taylor: And why is that then?
• 27:38
  Kelly Taylor: Oh, i can't see what they're doing.
• 27:40
  Kelly Taylor: I remember saying to a colleague about 18 months ago why have you hired somebody that you don't trust when you can't see them working?
• 27:49
  Kelly Taylor: Why on earth would you hire that person?
• 27:51
  Kelly Taylor: It doesn't make any sense to me.
• 27:52
  Kelly Taylor: I only hire people who I trust implicitly and, to be honest, i trust them immediately.
• 27:58
  Kelly Taylor: It's not a case of you have to earn my trust.
• 28:00
  Kelly Taylor: It's like no, you don't You have it.
• 28:03
  Kelly Taylor: You're hired.
• 28:03
  Kelly Taylor: You know what you've got to do.
• 28:04
  Kelly Taylor: You're all grown-ups.
• 28:06
  Kelly Taylor: Do your job, do your job and do everything else that makes you you to enable you to do your job.
• 28:12
  Kelly Taylor: That's how it should be, but invariably people don't do that.
• 28:16
  Kelly Taylor: I mean you hear horror stories, or read of horror stories as well, and people saying that they're asked in interviews about whether they have kids Like and not in a.
• 28:26
  Kelly Taylor: Just because I'm interested, it's because I'm just checking to see whether or not that could potentially be a complication along the way.
• 28:33
  Kelly Taylor: You know people asking in interviews.
• 28:35
  Kelly Taylor: I see you have kids.
• 28:36
  Kelly Taylor: How do you think that's going to affect you with traveling for work.
• 28:39
  Kelly Taylor: None of you are effing business.
• 28:41
  Kelly Taylor: You know that is something for me to manage.
• 28:44
  Kelly Taylor: You know it's kind of like you're acknowledging that I've got kids, but that's the incorrect way to acknowledge that someone's got children.
• 28:51
  Kelly Taylor: It's not a case of, yeah, you might find it a little bit difficult.
• 28:54
  Kelly Taylor: I'm assuming you are going to find it difficult because you've got kids.
• 28:57
  Kelly Taylor: It's like, okay, that's actually none of your business.
• 29:01
  Kelly Taylor: That's my concern of how I manage my time And it's a red flag for me If you ever find yourself in that.
• 29:06
  Elizabeth Willetts: There's a space.
• 29:06
  Elizabeth Willetts: The other argument is that I suppose I agree with you, they phrase it all wrong, but it's also like you said.
• 29:13
  Elizabeth Willetts: You know the employers have a duty of care to the person, and it's actually.
• 29:17
  Elizabeth Willetts: How then do they acknowledge that person, you know, has all the responsibilities, has a life, i suppose without it coming across as you know.
• 29:26
  Elizabeth Willetts: Discriminatory question What?
• 29:28
  Kelly Taylor: It's really hard.
• 29:28
  Kelly Taylor: I think the manager and the lead has to first of all look at themselves, look deep within themselves and think what is my motivation for asking this question?
• 29:38
  Kelly Taylor: So for me, i've got a lot of members on my team who have got parents of young kids And I found myself, if I'm completely honest, with a bit of unconscious bias.
• 29:50
  Kelly Taylor: And I caught myself doing it because, especially during lockdown, because I was a working parent and because I was feeling the pressures of being a working parent, i was very much alleviating the work of the working parents And, i think, landing too heavily on those that didn't have kids, which was incorrect, absolutely incorrect, And actually that kind of behavior is what ends up creating divisions between people within teams And that wasn't the correct thing to do.
• 30:20
  Kelly Taylor: But in terms of employing the whole stuff, i completely hear what you're saying.
• 30:23
  Kelly Taylor: I think it's more for me not making decisions or taking away people's ability to choose.
• 30:30
  Kelly Taylor: I think making the decision for them Like I'm not going to give that person that responsibility because they've got kids And I think my assumption is they are going to find that difficult to manage That's not the okay thing to do.
• 30:47
  Kelly Taylor: The okay thing to do is I mean really is to talk to that person about it and say, look, not ton of, bring the kids in.
• 30:56
  Kelly Taylor: It's how can I put it?
• 30:57
  Kelly Taylor: Let's say the work trip's coming up and you really want to kind of, there's a member of your team who's got kids and you want to send them on that work trip.
• 31:06
  Kelly Taylor: For me, the incorrect thing to do is to go I really like to send you, but we're a little bit concerned that you're going to find it really challenging because you've got children.
• 31:16
  Kelly Taylor: Uh-uh, no, that's not the way to address it.
• 31:20
  Kelly Taylor: I think the way to say is that we'd really love to send you on this trip.
• 31:23
  Kelly Taylor: How do you feel about that?
• 31:25
  Kelly Taylor: How do you feel about that?
• 31:26
  Kelly Taylor: Not, i'm going to take any of my preconceptions and put them upon you.
• 31:32
  Kelly Taylor: It's how do you feel about that?
• 31:35
  Kelly Taylor: Now, if you've done your job as a manager and a leader, you will have created that safe space for you to be able to have that conversation with your team member.
• 31:44
  Kelly Taylor: But if you haven't, then you are going to get somebody either going yeah, yeah, that sounds great, that sounds great And inside their heads just go woo, woo, woo, thinking oh, my God, i don't know how I'm going to manage this And maybe they are thinking that And maybe they are going to go home.
• 31:57
  Kelly Taylor: Well, they might say that does sound great, i just need to double check what's going on at home, or whatever.
• 32:02
  Kelly Taylor: But it's for them to say that.
• 32:05
  Kelly Taylor: It's not for you to say, as a manager and a leader, this is what I think is going to be the problem.
• 32:11
  Kelly Taylor: Tell me if I'm right.
• 32:13
  Kelly Taylor: It's for you to say talk to me about it and let them come back on it.
• 32:16
  Kelly Taylor: Really good advice.
• 32:18
  Elizabeth Willetts: So you obviously got some news because we spoke, for we start recording.
• 32:21
  Elizabeth Willetts: You are leaving employed Where to go for a time.
• 32:26
  Kelly Taylor: I am.
• 32:26
  Kelly Taylor: I've been employed since I was 21.
• 32:28
  Kelly Taylor: So it's 20 years now that I've been employed And I started.
• 32:34
  Kelly Taylor: I think I'm one of the 1% in the country I've made up that stat that studied what they actually went into.
• 32:40
  Kelly Taylor: I studied media at university and then went to go and work for publishers And now for seven and a half years And I've now been working for a well-known broadcaster for the last nearly 13 years And what's been incredible is that having my account has actually allowed me to have the option to take a step away from that and to think and give me some time to think.
• 33:06
  Kelly Taylor: What is that I want to do?
• 33:07
  Kelly Taylor: So, yes, i'm going to pivot career, pivot to full-time content creation.
• 33:12
  Kelly Taylor: For as long as it is, it's really exciting.
• 33:16
  Elizabeth Willetts: What's it going to look for you?
• 33:17
  Elizabeth Willetts: Is it just going to be more videos on the what's your plan?
• 33:21
  Kelly Taylor: The ironic thing is that one of the things that I'm the most passionate about is is being a working parent and actually you know the gender pay gap, the lack of affordable childcare and so many different topics that actually I've not really been able to address properly because the company where I work, there are certain and rightly so strict social media rules about remaining impartial on certain topics and so forth, so that hasn't really allowed me to really talk in the way that I want to about certain issues that are really affecting working mothers and working parents.
• 33:54
  Kelly Taylor: I also is the reality of there's only so much time in a day.
• 33:58
  Elizabeth Willetts: Yes, When you have a full time.
• 33:59
  Elizabeth Willetts: Your account is huge now because you must be getting messages all the time and do you feel pressure to respond?
• 34:05
  Kelly Taylor: Fostering a community was really, really important to me.
• 34:08
  Kelly Taylor: I don't like saying following because I don't know, I don't know.
• 34:11
  Kelly Taylor: I don't like the word influencer as well.
• 34:13
  Kelly Taylor: It's content creator and community Like.
• 34:15
  Kelly Taylor: That's kind of how I like to look at it And I want to be able to address certain issues.
• 34:17
  Kelly Taylor: I want to be able to talk to people.
• 34:19
  Kelly Taylor: I get people messaging me, telling me about really bad experiences when they've been coming back to work from maternity leave and people not really understanding what it's like and challenges with childcare and all the kind of things that come with it, And you can't get a message like that and go like.
• 34:32
  Kelly Taylor: You have to go back to that person.
• 34:33
  Kelly Taylor: You have to engage with them And I want to engage with them, but you're giving so much of yourself away all the time.
• 34:39
  Kelly Taylor: You'll have to be really conscious about your family, ultimately and everything else that's going on.
• 34:45
  Kelly Taylor: So the ironic thing is, by stepping away from employed work and going self employed, I actually am going to have more time to address the topics and talk about the topics that I actually want to, and I hope my actual hope is that I become more valuable actually to the community of working mothers.
• 35:01
  Kelly Taylor: That's what I want to be.
• 35:02
  Kelly Taylor: I want to become a valuable asset to people where they feel.
• 35:06
  Kelly Taylor: If they come, they can either have a laugh at the ridiculousness of what we're trying to juggle.
• 35:10
  Kelly Taylor: Do some more thought leadership pieces help educate people about things they need to consider when going back to work, things they need to consider about getting the right childcare providers?
• 35:21
  Kelly Taylor: whatever it may be, I don't know, but I just feel at the moment I'm in a halfway house.
• 35:27
  Elizabeth Willetts: Yeah, because it's a big account, isn't it?
• 35:28
  Elizabeth Willetts: And you're working.
• 35:30
  Kelly Taylor: It's working.
• 35:31
  Kelly Taylor: You know, instance, a full-time job.
• 35:32
  Kelly Taylor: It's like having three full-time jobs.
• 35:34
  Kelly Taylor: You're on.
• 35:34
  Elizabeth Willetts: TikTok as well.
• 35:35
  Elizabeth Willetts: I'll just Instagram I am, i am.
• 35:37
  Elizabeth Willetts: No, i'm on TikTok as well.
• 35:38
  Elizabeth Willetts: I'm not on TikTok, so I didn't ask that.
• 35:41
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, it's a lot, it's an incredible amount, and I'm not really giving the amount of energy and the amount of self I want to be able to give ultimately with having so many full-time jobs pairing a parent as a full-time job, having an Instagram as a full-time job, having a full-time job as a full-time job, you know, and as I say, there's only so many hours in the day, and I've got to a point now with my account where I can take a step back from being employed and kind of give myself a bit more bandwidth, a bit more time to be creative, because that's the other thing as well.
• 36:12
  Kelly Taylor: You know, a full and busy brain can't be creative.
• 36:15
  Elizabeth Willetts: It's very different, no, you are very creative, so you're hiding it well, so I'm very excited to see your very, very creative brain.
• 36:25
  Kelly Taylor: I know I think my brain is very great.
• 36:26
  Kelly Taylor: You know it's exciting, you know, to see what that looks like And I am, i am very excited, but you know, i know I'd be lying if I said I wasn't absolutely breaking it.
• 36:34
  Kelly Taylor: All I've ever known is since being, you know, working as employment And I know, you know I've got a lot of.
• 36:42
  Kelly Taylor: I'm very fortunate.
• 36:42
  Kelly Taylor: I've got a lot of friends who are either full-time content creators or are self-employed in other kind of areas of business, who have been amazing at giving such incredible advice about.
• 36:55
  Kelly Taylor: You know what that shift feels like because you know you go from working within a corporation with a team, with resources, or they're at your fingertips, and also you know there is the reality of steady finances.
• 37:09
  Kelly Taylor: It doesn't matter how you perform or what the market's really doing or what mood you're in or anything like that.
• 37:17
  Kelly Taylor: You are still getting the same amount of money at the end of each month, no matter, kind of, to an extent, what you're output, to moving to a world where it's going to be like this and you have to be much more self-motivated, which I don't struggle from.
• 37:34
  Kelly Taylor: I've never really struggled with self-motivation, but I don't know what it looks like.
• 37:38
  Kelly Taylor: I don't know what it looks like on the other side of the fence.
• 37:40
  Kelly Taylor: So I'm fascinated.
• 37:41
  Kelly Taylor: I hope also I become again a more valuable asset, not just because of the time and the creativity, but actually I'll start to understand all aspects of working motherhood And that's really what I want to understand.
• 37:52
  Kelly Taylor: I've seen one side of the fence, which is the age of nine to five, as it were, and then the self-employed side of things.
• 37:58
  Kelly Taylor: So I'm hoping to get a much fuller picture of all the different kind of angles of working motherhood and the different pressures that people feel and how to kind of address them.
• 38:07
  Kelly Taylor: Because, yes, some things are alleviated, others become a lot heavier.
• 38:13
  Elizabeth Willetts: Was it always the end goal for this to be like the full-time job when you first started kids?
• 38:18
  Elizabeth Willetts: So it's just been a nice thing?
• 38:20
  Elizabeth Willetts: No, it was a hobby.
• 38:22
  Kelly Taylor: Honestly, it was a hobby At first.
• 38:23
  Kelly Taylor: It started off as therapy and then it started to turn into things when Brand started to say they were interested in working with me And I work in branded content.
• 38:32
  Kelly Taylor: So when I say I've been a major, i've been in advertising for 20 plus years, so again, it's only a slight pivot, to an extent, because rather than doing it for a publisher or a broadcaster, i'm doing it for myself and for my own channels and with working with brands.
• 38:48
  Kelly Taylor: But no, any time anybody asked me, i was like, don't be ridiculous, i'm never going to be doing this full-time.
• 38:53
  Kelly Taylor: No, no, no, no, because I never saw that as a reality for me.
• 38:57
  Kelly Taylor: But then, all of a sudden, it just I don't know.
• 38:59
  Kelly Taylor: I just got to a point where I was like what are you doing?
• 39:01
  Kelly Taylor: I hit 40, to be honest, and I had an existential crisis of what are you doing?
• 39:04
  Kelly Taylor: I don't want to wake up in five years' time still doing the same thing And then be like you had an opportunity.
• 39:14
  Kelly Taylor: There was a window there of opportunity for you to explore and you didn't.
• 39:18
  Kelly Taylor: And it's because I'm not a risk taker.
• 39:19
  Kelly Taylor: I never have been a risk taker.
• 39:21
  Kelly Taylor: Everything is calculated, everything is planned, everything has its time and its place.
• 39:26
  Kelly Taylor: This is probably the most risky thing I've done, and I say that with an account that's already established.
• 39:31
  Kelly Taylor: It's not like I'm walking away from work to start up an account.
• 39:35
  Kelly Taylor: It is already established, it is already doing what it needs to do for me to be able to kind of pivot and leave my current role, but I'm still.
• 39:43
  Kelly Taylor: It's still a risk.
• 39:45
  Kelly Taylor: It's still a risk.
• 39:46
  Elizabeth Willetts: It's interesting.
• 39:47
  Elizabeth Willetts: I mean, obviously this is probably the people I follow, but I see a lot of self-employed moms and I find that hugely inspirational And I think it's nice to see people being able to do that and create the business, the life that they obviously want.
• 40:02
  Kelly Taylor: It is, and I need to think more like that.
• 40:04
  Kelly Taylor: And if anyone else is telling me that I have this, you know, one of my toxic traits is I have the ability to be able to see that for other people but an inability to see that for myself, and I think a lot of people would resonate with that.
• 40:16
  Kelly Taylor: You know, you're really good at giving other people advice.
• 40:18
  Kelly Taylor: When it comes to taking it yourself rubbish at it, I mean the way I speak to myself.
• 40:23
  Kelly Taylor: Sometimes I bully myself.
• 40:25
  Kelly Taylor: You know I would never speak to other people the way I speak to myself sometimes.
• 40:28
  Kelly Taylor: You know and it goes back to this whole imposter syndrome all the time, you know, i've been up on stage doing talks before you know, in my work capacity, and I've been sitting there thinking who wants to listen to you?
• 40:40
  Kelly Taylor: Why would anyone want to listen to you?
• 40:41
  Kelly Taylor: Is that voice in your head that unfortunately a lot of us, especially working moms, we tend to listen to and go.
• 40:48
  Kelly Taylor: You're right.
• 40:48
  Kelly Taylor: You're right, i am failing.
• 40:50
  Kelly Taylor: I am rubbish.
• 40:51
  Kelly Taylor: What am I thinking?
• 40:52
  Kelly Taylor: You would never speak to anybody else like that, and that is something I need to kind of get a lot better at.
• 40:58
  Kelly Taylor: It is incredible If I take a step back and think you never thought this was going to be a life you could create for yourself.
• 41:04
  Kelly Taylor: And all of a sudden you have say, all of a sudden it's been coming.
• 41:08
  Kelly Taylor: But you know, you've been able to do that.
• 41:10
  Kelly Taylor: But I also have to remind myself and everyone in the same boat should remind themselves that it didn't just happen.
• 41:15
  Kelly Taylor: You made it happen.
• 41:16
  Kelly Taylor: It's the work that you put into it.
• 41:18
  Kelly Taylor: You know the many hours, the trade-offs, the compromises, everything that you've done to get to this stage and say, yeah, this is what I want to do, it's what I want to give it a go Absolutely.
• 41:28
  Elizabeth Willetts: I think you'll be you know huge success.
• 41:30
  Elizabeth Willetts: I can't wait to see more videos.
• 41:32
  Elizabeth Willetts: What would you say to someone else listening to this thinking about becoming a content creator or maybe launching a business, particularly in the online world?
• 41:40
  Kelly Taylor: Content creator.
• 41:41
  Kelly Taylor: I'll be honest with you It's harder than it looks.
• 41:44
  Elizabeth Willetts: I'm not surprised.
• 41:44
  Elizabeth Willetts: I mean, i'm not content creator, but I, you know, sometimes post videos just about you know something we're launching and the amount of takes I do It takes I don't know how many takes you to for a video.
• 41:55
  Kelly Taylor: I can't explain how much harder it is than it actually looks like.
• 41:58
  Kelly Taylor: When I first I started my account back in 2019.
• 42:01
  Kelly Taylor: At the time, i was following a lot of fashion accounts and I honestly believed that all you needed to do was take a picture of yourself in front of a blossom tree or you know a pretty wall, in a nice outfit and write some pithy little comment and you basically get hundreds of thousands of followers, because that's what everybody did.
• 42:20
  Kelly Taylor: That's not how it works unbelievably.
• 42:23
  Kelly Taylor: It's actually way more skilled than I gave it credit for when I first started.
• 42:28
  Kelly Taylor: Sometimes just for a bit of a giggle.
• 42:30
  Kelly Taylor: I'll go back years ago to see the kind of stuff that I was doing.
• 42:35
  Kelly Taylor: But you're on a journey.
• 42:36
  Kelly Taylor: I mean, everybody is in whatever walk of life and whatever walk of business they kind of get into like a surgeon not comparing myself to a surgeon but a surgeon when they first started is not as good as they are now.
• 42:45
  Kelly Taylor: You know, a teacher when they first started is not as good as they are now.
• 42:47
  Kelly Taylor: You know, it's the same as parents, my God.
• 42:50
  Kelly Taylor: We have a better idea of what we're doing now than we did back then.
• 42:53
  Kelly Taylor: And it's the same with content creation.
• 42:56
  Kelly Taylor: But my advice would be one it's harder than it looks.
• 42:58
  Kelly Taylor: So you know you do.
• 42:59
  Kelly Taylor: Get the right tools.
• 43:00
  Kelly Taylor: Get the right tools.
• 43:01
  Kelly Taylor: Don't play at it.
• 43:02
  Kelly Taylor: If it's something you're serious about, don't play at it.
• 43:06
  Kelly Taylor: Do it properly.
• 43:08
  Kelly Taylor: One of my, i think, fears you heard the analogy about shroding as cat.
• 43:12
  Kelly Taylor: No, shroding is cat and if anyone actually knows this I'm gonna butcher this, but give me a sec It's basically there's a cat in a box, the box is closed, the cat is either dead or the cat is alive, but you're not gonna know unless you open the box.
• 43:28
  Kelly Taylor: Now You can live in blissful ignorance, believing that that cat is alive, or you can open the box and you can find out.
• 43:35
  Kelly Taylor: And The reason I have that analogy is the same with trying something new, because you can either sit there and think and have these visions and these fantasies about oh well, if I did that, this would happen and that would happen, and that's what I believe would happen if I did it and live that fantasy in your head constantly, or You can have a go and find out and, yes, you might fail, but at least you know.
• 44:03
  Kelly Taylor: And that's one of the reasons you know why I shifted to want to shift to full-time content Creation because I can keep playing in my head and going well, if I did this full-time, i'd have this, I'd have this, i'd be this, i'd be that I was so scared of actually trying to find out because in my head I'm gonna be successful but that might not be the reality and I'm okay with that.
• 44:21
  Kelly Taylor: But I need to find out.
• 44:23
  Kelly Taylor: I don't want to know.
• 44:24
  Kelly Taylor: Telling you stories to your grandkids Oh well, there was a time when I could have become a full-time content creator and you hear that, don't you?
• 44:30
  Elizabeth Willetts: some people are like that, you do.
• 44:32
  Kelly Taylor: I don't want that.
• 44:32
  Kelly Taylor: You know a god, goodness me the number of times I've heard kind of gentlemen who are slightly older than.
• 44:39
  Kelly Taylor: I could have had trials at this football club and if I'd gone, i'd been a Premier League player by now and all of that kind of stuff, and it's the same kind of thing.
• 44:46
  Kelly Taylor: So you know, don't play at it, don't have a halfway house, don't think to yourself, yeah, but what if I fail?
• 44:53
  Kelly Taylor: but what if you don't?
• 44:54
  Kelly Taylor: and you, if you don't try, you are never, ever going to find out.
• 44:57
  Kelly Taylor: Other piece of advice would be show up as yourself, please show up as yourself.
• 45:03
  Kelly Taylor: My account didn't start doing well until I I'm not gonna say stop to care what other people think.
• 45:08
  Kelly Taylor: I do still care what other people think.
• 45:09
  Kelly Taylor: I'm an inherent people, please, with a side order imposter syndrome, which is a nightmare for running an account, to be honest, because you constantly trying to keep everybody else happy.
• 45:18
  Kelly Taylor: But ultimately, the moment I started to show up as my authentic self is the moment that I actually had authentic connections with people, and Connections is what Instagram is all about.
• 45:28
  Kelly Taylor: Yes, there's pictures.
• 45:29
  Kelly Taylor: Yes, there's videos.
• 45:30
  Kelly Taylor: Yes, it's about connection, connecting with, with the people that follow you.
• 45:34
  Kelly Taylor: Creating a community that ultimately is is when it becomes Successful.
• 45:39
  Kelly Taylor: I don't if anybody follows Anna Martha.
• 45:41
  Kelly Taylor: She's one of my favorite human beings on and off the grid.
• 45:44
  Kelly Taylor: But years ago I went to go and see her do a talk and she was handing out of these like inspiration cards that she's got.
• 45:52
  Kelly Taylor: And again, i apologize if Anna's listening and I put you this quote, but I've got a card on my dressing table that I look at every morning when I'm doing my makeup And it said I'd rather be strange to you than be a stranger to myself.
• 46:04
  Kelly Taylor: And That always is the thing I see every morning.
• 46:08
  Kelly Taylor: Be yourself.
• 46:09
  Kelly Taylor: You're not always gonna be everybody's cup of tea, that's okay.
• 46:12
  Kelly Taylor: Forget whether you're on social media or not, that's okay.
• 46:16
  Kelly Taylor: Not everybody is going to like you.
• 46:18
  Kelly Taylor: Probably don't like everybody either.
• 46:20
  Kelly Taylor: You know, when you start to become at peace with that, you start to show up as yourself and actually you realize you find your tribe, you know, and that's kind of that's massively important.
• 46:29
  Kelly Taylor: So yeah, so those are my kind of piece of advice, really good advice I love it and I think it's something.
• 46:34
  Elizabeth Willetts: Actually, as you get older, you, in a way, i mean, you do care what people think, but maybe less, you know.
• 46:39
  Elizabeth Willetts: Then, when you're in your 20s, you know you've got to look a certain way and yeah, i think, i know, i think it's all about comfort, you know.
• 46:46
  Elizabeth Willetts: Just, you know, bring it back to that.
• 46:48
  Kelly Taylor: Well, it is I mean even now, you know, when friends all message me about going out and Sometimes I just think, yeah, i don't want to.
• 46:56
  Kelly Taylor: And in my 20s and even in my early 30s, i'd come up with all kinds of elaborate reasons as why I couldn't go out, because I just I thought the truth Was gonna sound like a cop out, that no, now if they message me, i go.
• 47:08
  Kelly Taylor: Do you know what?
• 47:09
  Kelly Taylor: guys, i'm not think I'm gonna be able to do it that week.
• 47:11
  Kelly Taylor: I've got a lot on.
• 47:12
  Kelly Taylor: I'm already out.
• 47:13
  Kelly Taylor: Well, it's so funny already out once that week.
• 47:15
  Kelly Taylor: I can't go out twice a week.
• 47:16
  Kelly Taylor: I don't think I can.
• 47:18
  Kelly Taylor: And everyone's like, do you know what?
• 47:19
  Kelly Taylor: completely get that.
• 47:20
  Kelly Taylor: You know, let's find a way, you know, in which we can do this another time.
• 47:24
  Kelly Taylor: And I think that you know it's that level of honesty as well.
• 47:27
  Kelly Taylor: It's just like I'll be honest, i'm tired and I really don't want to.
• 47:30
  Kelly Taylor: Friends of mine and I we're actually going to go watch the coronation.
• 47:34
  Kelly Taylor: Oh yeah, i'm very, very much looking forward to it and We're kind of arranging a night out and what we were going to be doing all together And it was one of those things.
• 47:44
  Kelly Taylor: We're kind of talking about going out, but we have to be up really early in the morning.
• 47:47
  Kelly Taylor: We have to be up before a clock in the morning.
• 47:49
  Elizabeth Willetts: Obviously, you're actually really going to go.
• 47:51
  Elizabeth Willetts: You know can't get the front, Yeah, Yeah.
• 47:52
  Kelly Taylor: Good for you.
• 47:53
  Kelly Taylor: We're staying in London to go.
• 47:55
  Kelly Taylor: And my mate was like, right, we're getting before a clock in the morning So we can be at the batteries by five.
• 48:00
  Kelly Taylor: And I'm like, right, i can do this, i can do this.
• 48:02
  Kelly Taylor: And then she started talking about going out that night.
• 48:04
  Kelly Taylor: I was like mate, can we just call a spade a spade here?
• 48:06
  Kelly Taylor: that isn't going to happen.
• 48:08
  Kelly Taylor: I would really very much like to be in my pyjamas by 10 o'clock at night.
• 48:12
  Kelly Taylor: I, which, because everyone I went.
• 48:14
  Kelly Taylor: Oh, my god, i'm so glad you said that and it was just that kind of relief of can we just admit that we're all going to be knackered.
• 48:20
  Kelly Taylor: You know, the next day we've got to get up, come home, you know, and with the best will in the world or other halves gonna be like that, the kids for two days.
• 48:28
  Kelly Taylor: No, no, you need to have them back.
• 48:30
  Kelly Taylor: Now.
• 48:31
  Kelly Taylor: We can, we can, we hand them over.
• 48:33
  Kelly Taylor: You know there is all of that that goes with it and, like you said, i think it does come with age Absolutely, that you still care what people think, but it doesn't affect you as much.
• 48:43
  Kelly Taylor: You're like I just rather be honest now because I'm tired And I don't want to do that and I'm just gonna be honest and say I don't want to do that, and again it just goes back to showing up as your authentic self.
• 48:52
  Kelly Taylor: It's like this is who I am.
• 48:53
  Kelly Taylor: I actually like who I am and I'm sorry if I'm not your cup of tea, i'm sorry if That's how you feel, but that's your trigger that you've got to deal with.
• 49:02
  Kelly Taylor: There's a, you know, not so smug, and our cat is brilliant at talking about other people's triggers and You know some of the.
• 49:10
  Kelly Taylor: She's given me lots of very, very good advice over the years.
• 49:13
  Kelly Taylor: But one thing was about talking about Triggers and when message people, message you online and tell you they don't like your content or they don't like what you've done, she said at first she felt it was a reflection of her and the content She was making, and then she realized that no, it's actually a reflection of the person and how they've read your content or how they've Engaged with your content, that you might have triggered them, and that's something that they've got to deal with internally.
• 49:38
  Kelly Taylor: You're not being deliberately offensive.
• 49:40
  Kelly Taylor: During lockdown, there was a lot of jokes around drinking and mothers drinking, and At the time I did get a few messages from.
• 49:49
  Kelly Taylor: You know people saying I'm getting really bored of these mum accounts who are glorifying drinking.
• 49:55
  Kelly Taylor: I said, what do you mean glorifying drinking?
• 49:58
  Kelly Taylor: I'm like you know you're sitting there with a bottle of wine and a spiral straw Or you're making a joke out of drinking and it's a really serious problem.
• 50:05
  Kelly Taylor: I was like, oh my goodness, that is not you know and I was kind of messing up.
• 50:08
  Kelly Taylor: I'm really sorry, i didn't.
• 50:09
  Kelly Taylor: I didn't mean to offend you this and the other, but actually there were Literally thousands of other people that didn't take it like that or they did take it that it was humor and I realized that I wasn't actually Sitting around drinking white wine out of a straw every day.
• 50:25
  Kelly Taylor: I wasn't and it was a joke.
• 50:27
  Kelly Taylor: But also, you know, you start to realize that Humor can be very divisive and actually the way that some people take your sense of humor, it might trigger them, it might offend them some people.
• 50:38
  Elizabeth Willetts: Actually, the best humor is quite offensive when you work like Ricky Gervais, who's obviously, you know, he's obviously the hype, you know, top of his profession.
• 50:46
  Elizabeth Willetts: It is risky And I think, oh, and we are, but it makes you laugh and actually some.
• 50:52
  Elizabeth Willetts: I think sometimes the best humor has to sometimes be It's a relatable humor.
• 50:56
  Elizabeth Willetts: But then that humor it's a bit dangerous And you think, oh, should I laugh, can I laugh?
• 51:01
  Elizabeth Willetts: and then you get that relief when everyone else is laughing and I Know it's funny.
• 51:06
  Kelly Taylor: It's one of those weird things where I I like to make my humor, maybe thought provoking, but I'm also really conscious of not crossing certain boundaries.
• 51:15
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, obviously he's, he's.
• 51:17
  Elizabeth Willetts: Ricky Gervais.
• 51:19
  Kelly Taylor: He's a good example of those that kind of I mean his humor.
• 51:21
  Kelly Taylor: Sometimes he pokes the sleeping bear all the time.
• 51:26
  Kelly Taylor: That's the kind of comedian That he is, but I do think that there are ways.
• 51:31
  Kelly Taylor: You know, the incredible Victoria would.
• 51:33
  Kelly Taylor: She is, for me, just one of the funniest human beings to have ever lived.
• 51:38
  Kelly Taylor: To be honest, i think she's fantastic and She could.
• 51:41
  Kelly Taylor: Not only was she a beautiful storyteller, but she was able to be comedic without the need to offend, and I think that's what I became very conscious of that The kind of humor that I was putting out there was never would be intent to offend or to poke the sleeping bear.
• 52:00
  Kelly Taylor: It just so happened that at times people were like they were being triggered by it, but it that's for them to kind of To cope with.
• 52:07
  Kelly Taylor: I mean, also there was an element of truth, not that I was glorifying Drinking, but actually, if I look back at some of my freeful story lockdown, it's like drinking, drinking, drinking, drinking.
• 52:18
  Kelly Taylor: You know, there was the element of I'm really stressed, I'm gonna have a glass of wine, and I became really quite conscious of that and thought, okay, fine, well, i can see why.
• 52:25
  Kelly Taylor: Maybe I'll try other metrics.
• 52:27
  Kelly Taylor: I'll be honest, sometimes It isn't as funny if you're not using the glass of wine or the bottle of wine or whatever you're doing.
• 52:35
  Kelly Taylor: You're kind of being a bit outlandish with it.
• 52:37
  Kelly Taylor: But I can also see how people can be triggered.
• 52:38
  Kelly Taylor: So you are kind of taking all of that into consideration.
• 52:43
  Kelly Taylor: I mean, you do put it through a filter.
• 52:44
  Kelly Taylor: I've got a friend to a content creators and we often will send each other our content before we post and go.
• 52:50
  Kelly Taylor: Can you see anything that's gonna wind anyone up here that might potentially trigger somebody?
• 52:55
  Kelly Taylor: because you have to be really, really careful.
• 52:56
  Kelly Taylor: It's something that you might not have thought of and there have been times when we've all called each other's content and gone.
• 53:01
  Kelly Taylor: There might be a better way to potentially Tell that story or maybe we could do like this, and sometimes you're ever thinking it massively and Sometimes you might not be can you say?
• 53:12
  Elizabeth Willetts: is it Sharon Hogan?
• 53:13
  Elizabeth Willetts: that's is a catastrophe and motherland.
• 53:17
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah when you asked of like translating back to a big employer you know, i Think so I mean I've writing was where it all started for me.
• 53:25
  Kelly Taylor: I've always enjoyed writing and that's you know.
• 53:28
  Kelly Taylor: At the time when I first joined Instagram, it wasn't videos, reels hadn't come about yet, it was all about pictures and writing.
• 53:34
  Kelly Taylor: Pictures and writing.
• 53:35
  Kelly Taylor: But definitely, look, i've worked in television and digital content, as I say, for goodness knows how many years in the 20 plus years.
• 53:41
  Kelly Taylor: So I naturally Lean toward storytelling from a video perspective.
• 53:47
  Kelly Taylor: But I adore television.
• 53:48
  Kelly Taylor: I've always adored television.
• 53:49
  Kelly Taylor: I am that annoying person who, when I'm watching it, i I know the story arcs, so I can already see what's going to happen before it's happened.
• 53:59
  Kelly Taylor: Because you know, you know how television programs are constructed, you know the way in which scripts work, you know the way in which certain characters are motivated to do certain things and because they're going to have to do that in the end.
• 54:11
  Kelly Taylor: And you can see, you know.
• 54:13
  Kelly Taylor: It's almost like an architect that can look at a house and can actually see the blueprint and the technical drawings.
• 54:20
  Kelly Taylor: I feel like that when I watch television.
• 54:22
  Kelly Taylor: Yes, i can watch it as a viewer, but I can also watch it from the production standpoint, that I can actually see how it was put together and the different metrics and the.
• 54:34
  Kelly Taylor: You know that they when they've been script writing and how they've done it.
• 54:36
  Kelly Taylor: So yes, in a very long-winded answer I could absolutely.
• 54:39
  Elizabeth Willetts: I would love to see.
• 54:40
  Elizabeth Willetts: Oh, i think it'd be fantastic.
• 54:42
  Elizabeth Willetts: That would be watch this space.
• 54:44
  Elizabeth Willetts: Yeah, the next Motherland, or something like that.
• 54:48
  Kelly Taylor: It would be.
• 54:48
  Kelly Taylor: I mean, honestly, motherland is one of my absolute favorite comedies.
• 54:52
  Kelly Taylor: I think it is so unbelievably clever and you can watch it in different ways.
• 54:56
  Kelly Taylor: Sharon Hogan is one of also one of my favorite writers.
• 54:58
  Kelly Taylor: I think it's that beautiful mix of reality being relatable but then just throwing in some really dark humor.
• 55:08
  Kelly Taylor: Phoebe Waller Bridge is another one of my favorites for being able to do that just catching you off guard You're one minute you're belly laughing about something and the next minute you're in tears.
• 55:18
  Kelly Taylor: I just think their writing is so brilliant and clever.
• 55:21
  Kelly Taylor: But also it's about the strength of the female characters that they write And I think you know that is a real art.
• 55:27
  Kelly Taylor: You know the female characters aren't just there as fluff or uncandy or just because we're trying to tick a box and get a quota.
• 55:36
  Kelly Taylor: They're leading that narrative and they're really smart And I think you know that's more of the writing that I would like to do And I think it's more of the writing that appeals to me and I know appeals to other women.
• 55:47
  Kelly Taylor: It's like I want to see as strong, i want to see as as vulnerable, i want to see as as real people who aren't just there to tick a box in a story, who are actually fundamentally there and driving that narrative, and it's you know, really key.
• 56:55
  Elizabeth Willetts: So yeah, we were very late to the party, but we just finished last night.
• 57:00
  Kelly Taylor: Oh my God, Sarah Lancashire.
• 57:01
  Elizabeth Willetts: She's a very good character and a sister and everything, but it's that.
• 57:06
  Kelly Taylor: It's that I love tuning into those programs And I know it sounds silly, but also like sitting down with Mother Half to watch those programs as well, because we went through years when I actually looked at the program we were watching.
• 57:16
  Kelly Taylor: It was very male, dominated in terms of the protagonist, action driven All action.
• 57:22
  Kelly Taylor: Or it was always the lead detective was a man And, yes, there was a woman involved, but she wasn't, you know that smart and you know she was just there because she was pretty or whatever it may be.
• 57:30
  Kelly Taylor: And and now it's not like that And I'm I'm really excited by that true detective.
• 57:35
  Kelly Taylor: I don't know if you've ever watched that.
• 57:36
  Kelly Taylor: That is an incredible program.
• 57:40
  Kelly Taylor: I think it's going to move to HB, i'm not sure And they're now talking about the lead detective being Jodie Foster And I was like, oh yes, please, you know it's all of that.
• 57:49
  Kelly Taylor: I'm like, yes, they're taking these really strong female characters and writing believable parts.
• 57:54
  Kelly Taylor: Believable parts, not again, as I say, fluffy parts, and that's what I'm really loving about the way that kind of content is going And also the rise, if I'm honest, of the mum fluencer, if you like.
• 58:05
  Kelly Taylor: You know that happened during lockdown.
• 58:07
  Kelly Taylor: There was a real rise in mums going.
• 58:11
  Kelly Taylor: I'm just going to start talking about what my daily life is And this is what I'm doing.
• 58:14
  Kelly Taylor: I'm absolutely kind of loving that And all the, all the different aspects of motherhood.
• 58:18
  Kelly Taylor: I think that is what is brilliant, because I think it felt very two dimensional back in the day.
• 58:24
  Kelly Taylor: There was only one way to parent And this was the way you were going to parent.
• 58:28
  Kelly Taylor: And now I mean I remember when we then see tea, everyone kind of being like, oh, you've got mum friends.
• 58:34
  Kelly Taylor: Now I'm like just because someone's a mum doesn't mean they're going to be my friend.
• 58:38
  Kelly Taylor: Yes, having children, you know having children is still common ground, don't get me wrong.
• 58:44
  Kelly Taylor: But it doesn't necessarily mean that you know we're going to get on, we're going to be mates, because you know I'm the type of mum that will show up to a play date with the bottle of Prosecco.
• 58:54
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, absolutely Not all mums do that And not all mums, you know, and that's not a judgment in any way, shape or form I might have said you've got to find your tribe, haven't you?
• 59:04
  Elizabeth Willetts: You have to get it, so flipping important.
• 59:06
  Kelly Taylor: You have to find your tribe.
• 59:08
  Kelly Taylor: You know you have to find those people.
• 59:10
  Kelly Taylor: That way you can go.
• 59:10
  Kelly Taylor: Oh, i lost my shoes all this morning on the on the school run, and then for everybody else to go, so did I.
• 59:16
  Kelly Taylor: Oh, my God you know.
• 59:17
  Kelly Taylor: And actually have they done this confession?
• 59:18
  Kelly Taylor: where people just go, i don't know what you mean.
• 59:20
  Kelly Taylor: You shout at your children.
• 59:22
  Kelly Taylor: I try and gentle parent, i honestly do, but then they just come a point.
• 59:26
  Kelly Taylor: When I come, i just get to my limit and I'm like no my limits get short and short.
• 59:31
  Elizabeth Willetts: I'll be on it especially.
• 59:33
  Kelly Taylor: It's all about.
• 59:34
  Kelly Taylor: It's all about filling your cup And you know, i'll be honest with you, it is really confusing online at the moment because there is there is a massive gentle parent movement which I am very supportive to be able to do Very supportive, to be 100% clear.
• 59:44
  Kelly Taylor: But it also makes you feel a bit rubbish when you're not able to do what you're being told to by various child psychologists who say you shouldn't you know you shouldn't shout at your children, and but you need to make sure you've got enough energy so that you don't shout at your children.
• 59:59
  Kelly Taylor: But your children are also draining your energy, which is why you shout at your children.
• 1:00:03
  Kelly Taylor: You know, and it's just this we just have to accept that we are the parents that we are and we're learning all the time and we're developing and we're reading on different techniques and so on.
• 1:00:11
  Kelly Taylor: But just because you shout your kids doesn't mean you felt I had one lovely lady message me not too long ago and she was just.
• 1:00:17
  Kelly Taylor: She mentioned me going.
• 1:00:17
  Kelly Taylor: I feel like such a bad parent, you know, this morning, because I, you know, i completely lost it with my kids this morning And I messaged her back and think I did a talkie story about it just going.
• 1:00:26
  Kelly Taylor: I shouted my kids this morning to who did a poll, who shouted at their kids this morning because they were being little nightmares and wouldn't get out the poll was just went through the roof And I was like, see, see, like there is a danger with certain narratives around parenting that can actually end up making you feel a little bit rubbish and feel guilty for not being able to do this, or shouting, or losing your temper or not being able to regulate machine.
• 1:00:56
  Kelly Taylor: The reality is, as a parent, you are regulating every bones and motions in your house continually and you forget about your own, and that's often why you end up losing it, because your focus is so much on everybody else and so little on yourself.
• 1:01:07
  Kelly Taylor: That's why you lose it.
• 1:01:09
  Kelly Taylor: You know I have never lost it with my kids when I've been in a good mood or full of energy.
• 1:01:15
  Kelly Taylor: I've just been able to go let's do, let's do with this, let's do with this.
• 1:01:18
  Kelly Taylor: Some people say I just, i just, i don't have time to prioritize myself.
• 1:01:22
  Kelly Taylor: I get it, i completely get it.
• 1:01:25
  Kelly Taylor: I'm reading this book at the moment, not my book.
• 1:01:27
  Kelly Taylor: Find your unicorn space, so claim your creative life in a too busy world.
• 1:01:32
  Kelly Taylor: What is brilliant is that it talks about prioritizing your life, your priorities, about your creative spark, because what actually happened in lockdown is everyone turned to being creative in some way.
• 1:01:46
  Kelly Taylor: So I had friends that turned to painting, to drawing.
• 1:01:50
  Kelly Taylor: You know, there was this massive like movement into craft, believe it or not, or people starting Instagram accounts and storytelling and all this kind of stuff.
• 1:01:59
  Kelly Taylor: It's not about self care in terms of I'm going to run myself a bath or I'm going to go to the supermarket on my own, which, incidentally, is not self care.
• 1:02:05
  Kelly Taylor: I know people always joke about self care is going to supermarket on your own.
• 1:02:08
  Kelly Taylor: No, it isn't.
• 1:02:09
  Kelly Taylor: It isn't.
• 1:02:09
  Kelly Taylor: It's nice, not self care, but it's about finding your creative spark and allowing yourself to be creatively you.
• 1:02:16
  Kelly Taylor: It could be cooking, but actually it's about sharing what you've made with other people.
• 1:02:21
  Kelly Taylor: It made me laugh when I was reading the book.
• 1:02:22
  Kelly Taylor: I'm like, oh my God, that's what I have been doing And that's what everyone who turned to Instagram or social media was doing.
• 1:02:27
  Kelly Taylor: They were sharing their stories, in whatever way, with other people.
• 1:02:30
  Kelly Taylor: But it's the same.
• 1:02:31
  Kelly Taylor: If you cook a really lovely meal and have a dinner party with your friends, you're sharing your skills and being creative because you love to cook or whatever it may be, but it's saying that actually you don't really understand who your authentic self is until you actually express yourself creatively and do that and find that space and read that book or write that book or write that poem or whatever it may be.
• 1:02:54
  Kelly Taylor: But prioritising yourself to be creative which you know some people will prioritise that or some people just call it a hobby or their side hustle, but actually that devalues what it is or the importance that it brings to you for finding that spark And especially with motherhood, where I think a lot of us can admit to losing our identity actually finding that creative spark that makes us go.
• 1:03:14
  Kelly Taylor: Oh, oh, i remember that.
• 1:03:16
  Kelly Taylor: I remember doing that.
• 1:03:17
  Kelly Taylor: Yeah, that's what I want to do And I want to put more of my time and energy into doing something that's just for me but that I can then share with those that I love.
• 1:03:26
  Kelly Taylor: That's a brilliant space to be in, but it is about prioritising it.
• 1:03:30
  Kelly Taylor: You know the amount of people that go oh, i've got an idea for a book, i just can't get round to writing it.
• 1:03:34
  Kelly Taylor: Find time to write it.
• 1:03:35
  Kelly Taylor: Find the time, make the time, prioritise the time.
• 1:03:38
  Kelly Taylor: Find a way to be able to do that.
• 1:03:41
  Kelly Taylor: You know, and that's what I've done with my Instagram account.
• 1:03:43
  Kelly Taylor: And if I hadn't made all that time during going a full circle here, if I've not found that time to make that time to prioritise, it may be in a way in certain times, or probably shouldn't have done, but did, i wouldn't now be able to go and now I'm going to have a career pivot and go and do this full time.
• 1:03:58
  Kelly Taylor: So we owe it in ourselves to invest in our creativity, because we've all got it within us, in whatever area that has.
• 1:04:04
  Kelly Taylor: It's so hard, i know as a mum, especially as a working mum, to be able to find the time because we're doing everything all of the time, but actually I feel I've become a better and happier person because I've invested more time into being creative and being creative for myself and doing that kind of level of storytelling.
• 1:04:19
  Kelly Taylor: So it's an investment.
• 1:04:21
  Kelly Taylor: Everyone should work.
• 1:04:22
  Kelly Taylor: It's worth taking.
• 1:04:23
  Elizabeth Willetts: Rowan, just what's that book called again?
• 1:04:24
  Elizabeth Willetts: It's called Find Your.
• 1:04:26
  Kelly Taylor: Unicorn Space Brilliant.
• 1:04:29
  Elizabeth Willetts: I love it I completely recommend it.
• 1:04:31
  Elizabeth Willetts: Okay, looks like it's written by Brilliant Well, i love following you.
• 1:04:36
  Elizabeth Willetts: This is why I follow you and not the gentle parenting experts, because I don't know who you're talking about.
• 1:04:40
  Elizabeth Willetts: You are definitely my type of girl.
• 1:04:43
  Elizabeth Willetts: You would be my tribe, so thank you so much for chatting with me today.
• 1:04:49
  Elizabeth Willetts: Where can people find you, follow you and connect with you?
• 1:04:53
  Kelly Taylor: So on Instagram and on TikTok it's kids underscore, the underscore and the commute.
• 1:05:00
  Kelly Taylor: So kids in the commute, spelled in a very silly way, but you'll see my face pop up when you type it in Just Instagram and TikTok at the moment, not on any other jazzy platforms.
• 1:05:09
  Kelly Taylor: And then hopefully there will be more of me coming up in the following months when I have a bit more free time to be able to concentrate on the creativity.
• 1:05:17
  Elizabeth Willetts: I'm really excited.
• 1:05:18
  Elizabeth Willetts: It's a brilliant time, obviously, to start following you.
• 1:05:20
  Elizabeth Willetts: If you don't follow you yet, i'm sure a lot of people already know who you are, but if you're not, obviously we're going to be learning more about you and your journey into self-employment, and best of luck with it, Thank you.
• 1:05:30
  Kelly Taylor: Thank you very much And thank you so much for having me.
• 1:05:32
  Kelly Taylor: Honestly, it's been brilliant.
• 1:05:34
  Elizabeth Willetts: Oh, thank you.
• 1:05:35
  Elizabeth Willetts: Thank you for listening to another episode of the Work It Like A Mon podcast.
• 1:05:42
  Elizabeth Willetts: If you enjoyed this episode, please rate, review and subscribe, and don't forget to share the link with a friend.
• 1:05:48
  Elizabeth Willetts: If you're on LinkedIn, please send me a connection request at Elizabeth Willett and let me know your thoughts on this week's episode.
• 1:05:55
  Elizabeth Willetts: You can also follow my recruitment site Investing in Women on LinkedIn, facebook and Instagram.
• 1:06:01
  Elizabeth Willetts: Until next time, keep on chasing your big dreams.