Latest / Do Hard Things™ with Siegfried Tiegs / DHT REPLAY: The Impact of Love Languages on Human Relationships

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DHT REPLAY: The Impact of Love Languages on Human Relationships · Do Hard Things™ with Siegfried Tiegs

• 0:44
  Speaker 1: Right, good morning everybody.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to another edition of the Jew Heart Things Weekly Wake.
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: Up.
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: I'm Jay Teiggs and I have in studio with me the lovely Angie Betrayan.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: How are you doing this morning?
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: I am awake.
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: I am here.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: I made it it's President's Day.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: I'm off work.
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: Today.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: It is President's.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: Day.
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: What does that mean I?
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: don't know, jay.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: What does it mean?
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: What is President's?
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: Day School the public on President's Day?
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: Well for one, I don't know I was like well, I think it's.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: Washington's birthday?
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: I think it's Lincoln's birthday.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: That's a good question.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: What is President's Day?
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: Why do we celebrate it?
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it catches me off guard almost every year.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: It's like, oh, it's a massive sale.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: It's a job work.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: We're off school President's Day.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: Let's see here, let's see what the internet tells us.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: So this birthday is a US federal holiday, celebrated on the third Monday of February in honor of George Washington, the first president of the United States.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: Increasingly, the holiday has become an occasion to celebrate birthdays of both President George Washington and Abraham Lincoln, and mattress sales.
• 1:55
  Speaker 2: And I have.
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: This federal holiday falls on the third Monday of February, commemorating America's 45 commanders in chief.
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: Grover Cleveland served two non consecutive terms, so is considered the 22nd and 24th US president Interesting.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, hey, we're here celebrating.
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: We're here celebrating President's Day, which is awesome.
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: Thank you, gentlemen, for all you have done for our country and all those going forwards, thank you, yes.
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: And some of you more than that.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, absolutely so.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: Aside from that, how's how's life treating?
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: I'm so sore today, jay, let me tell you, we went and we did some trail running this weekend out in St James on some mountain bike trails.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they were pretty technical.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: We did about 10 and a half miles and I bit it.
• 2:50
  Speaker 2: I bit it so not too hard but I still bit it and at 46, biting it at landing soft or landing hard is biting it right.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: So and I didn't hurt myself, thank God, like I was, as I was looking around I'm like, thank God, where I fell, my shoulder kind of dug into their mud and I like slid a little bit.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: So I'm just kind of sore just working that out my body's, like you know.
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: So I went and got a massage yesterday Getting in those Tajimao, so Tajimaos.
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we went and walked about six and a half miles yesterday after doing the 10 and a half on Saturday, which really helped.
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: You know, when you move your body, you loop, your movement is lubricant, absolutely.
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: I moved and lubed my joints yesterday.
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: So, yes, it's so good.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: Well, let's.
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: I want to dive.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: I want to dive a little more into that real quick.
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: Before we do that real quick, just to shout out to our sponsors real quick.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: Hey, if you've gained any.
• 3:45
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• 3:48
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• 3:50
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• 3:57
  Speaker 1: Make sure you smash that subscribe button so you're notified of future episodes, and share it with a couple of your friends.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: We're trying to get the word about what we're talking about here.
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: Take a screenshot, share it and we'd love to hear back from you.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: Like what?
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: What insight are you going to grab onto you this episode, sponsored by Lines Guide?
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: Lines Guide is a growth agency.
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: We believe that everyone's a leader.
• 4:16
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• 4:31
  Speaker 2: A lot of people are like you know what?
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: I'm not a leader.
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: I'm not a leader because they don't lead anyone at work.
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: Well, you know what?
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: If you have a family, you're leading.
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: If you're involved in an organization to some capacity, you're probably a leader.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: And you know their leadership is something that you can skill up on and you can improve upon.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: And you know you can find yourself overwhelmed, you can find yourself lacking confidence.
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: We work on all of those things.
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: How do you lead yourself better?
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: How do you lead other teams more effectively?
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: And if you'd like to learn more about that, you can let Lines Guide help you solve your leadership challenges so you can increase your bottom line, find more peace.
• 5:03
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• 5:09
  Speaker 1: This episode is also brought to you by UARD, the University of Applied Research and Development, where we help veterans obtain their bachelor and master's degree in emergency management.
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: Study abroad in New Zealand for a short trip, long tour Funded by.
• 5:20
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• 5:26
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• 5:28
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• 5:35
  Speaker 1: You can go to wwwuarduniversity or go over dohardthingsnationcom.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: I'll reach out directly because I'm one of the associate professors there and I will get you squared away.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: We have a webinar every other Tuesday, so if you'd like to join us on the webinar, I can get you to the link.
• 5:52
  Speaker 2: So, aside from that, oh, yeah, also you want some kick-ass gear?
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: Nobody cares.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Work harder shirt.
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: Angie's got her.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: Do hard things hat.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: Go over to wwwuardthingsnationcom.
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: Grab yourself some merch over there.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: High quality apparel.
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: We're getting ready to have a footprint over in our local PX we're actually and another store here in town, so I'm so excited about that.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we're going to start rolling out and we're scaling it up.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: We're scaling it up.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: It's like get out of the army, all right.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: So yeah, president's Day, how about that?
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: We're both off today, yeah, so how are you doing?
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: How are you doing you?
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: know what.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: Okay, how am I doing?
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: That's a great question.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: I had an interesting experience yesterday because I have been on this up and down roller coaster and I'm sure those and as I talk to people that have transitioned from the military, it's just like a roller coaster of emotion.
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: So I've been doing okay.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: I have to be fully honest, I'm dealing with a lot of my, a lot of my feels right now as I transitioned from the military.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: I'm both excited, but I'm also I'm going to get a lot more scared and nervous and I'm just kind of going through.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: You know, in my life in the army I've had my best days and my worst days.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: I'll be honest.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: Yesterday, lacey and I were running and we had a conversation and it kind of led to a small argument and and um, something interesting had happened.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: We went for a run, we left the run, we went to go have breakfast and the local eatery was like out of internet and they didn't have any internet so they couldn't take car, and they were like well, we never carry cash.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: So we went down to like this truck stop down the road, like miles down the road, because they said that Cable America was out everywhere and we didn't want to go bounce from place to place looking for a restaurant.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: Like I know some place where Cable America doesn't reach them, we'll go down to this truck stop and get a good chat and we went down there and started having breakfast.
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: You know, we ordered breakfast and this guy walks up.
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: He saw my book I had a third ACR book.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: He's like he's like I know you and I'm like, oh my gosh, I heard his voice.
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: I'm like I know you.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: Like we deployed together back in 2003.
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: He just started telling me like how great retirement's been for him, like he's been out for five years and things have been great.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: We kind of talked a little bit about deployment and some of the people that we knew, and it was just such an odd happenstance Him and his wife were just traveling through out to Branson, they were just coming back on his way back to another part of the state and it was just such a freak happenstance and a moment in time that I needed to hear it, like someone from my past at a very just a tough period in my life in the present moment, telling me that my future is going to be okay Because he's walked that path without any prompting, like out of nowhere.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: It was.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: So it's like a law of attraction, spiritual moment in my opinion, and it gave me a lot of peace and comfort and his wife was there and was kind of like giving Lacey some guidance too about what to expect, and here's my phone number if you need anything.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: It was such a cool moment.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: It was such a cool moment.
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: So I know that was a long-winded answer to how you're doing, because a lot of people are like I'm doing great, I'm fine Well no, I like fine, always.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, no, give me the long-winded answer I like hearing about that that is.
• 9:12
  Speaker 2: Thank you for sharing that.
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: That is really freaking cool.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and you know I'm walking that path of all the uncertainties and that's just a lot.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: It's just real life, you know, and I think that's I like to talk about real life and that's kind of, you know, I'm I'm doing okay, I've been better, I've been better, to be honest, but I've also been a lot worse.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: So that's how I'm doing.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: That's good.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: I mean, hey look I, when you asked me this morning how I was doing and I just went off the rails about my trail running and falling and how I'm feeling after Then you were like, hey, let's, let's talk about our sponsors.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: I was like whoa, that was maybe I was just talking way too much.
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: No, no, no, no.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: I didn't mean to like blow it off like that.
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: I wanted to get into that before we got into a deep conversation, because my my next question for you was I love that, I love the same.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: Did you fall in the rock garden?
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: Did I fall in the rock garden?
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're mountain biking.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: There's a rock garden part where it's like all really rocky.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's usually where people fall.
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: That's where I fall it wasn't like mile seven and so I don't know.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: I just remember it's probably because I was really tired and I wasn't picking up my feet.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: You know, when you're out there I have to remind myself pick up your feet so I don't start dragging my feet.
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: So I'm sure somewhere around mile seven.
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure because one of our buddies, dom, had to take off and I just tripped and fell.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: But I don't know, because I remember as we progressed a little bit further, it was super, super rocky with like these big razor sharp edged rocks and I'm thinking, my God, thank God I didn't fall here, because had I fallen here and then dug my shoulder or something into one of these rocks, that could have been like really.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: It sounds like that you're in the rock garden area, because that's it's really like very difficult through there.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: Anyway, yeah, that's that's what.
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: I was about mom for trail running.
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, but I'll tell you where we were.
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: Have you ran out there at the forest, forest city?
• 11:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, so the last two loops are the most beautiful loops, the last two really hard loops.
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: It's got like these big rock walls and then this rock you can walk out and it's like this big cliff looking deal.
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: Do you know what I'm talking about?
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: Like, it's like that fall happened before all.
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: Oh my God, it was just.
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: I'm like, oh wow.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: I mean I'm just glad that we kept going, that I didn't take that shortcut on the road to go back to the car, and just.
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: You know, it was great.
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, that's.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: It's a beautiful, it's a beautiful trail.
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: They're actually in a trail building coming up.
• 11:43
  Speaker 1: So yeah well, it's awesome, yeah, yeah.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: Anyway, tashi's going.
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: Good for you.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, for those of you who know, Taji 100 is like an annual February event.
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: I got derailed a little bit by the illness and sickness so I'm trying to play catch-up on that.
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: So we've got about another eight days to go.
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: You've got to get 100 miles or more.
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: That I've added swimming and cycling and all this stuff, but it's really just a challenge to get the body moving.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I wish.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: I kind of I really liked the Taji 100 and I kind of wish there was something like that every month.
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think having challenges something to work for, especially, like you see, come of February tradition and February is your tough for the Midwest, so it makes February go by faster.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: I couldn't think of it.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: There is something that we could do like that every month.
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know, E3 challenge maybe, I don't.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: Well, I was just looking.
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: We did the March to Ukraine this time last year as well, so we're, we're, we're doing another virtual challenge so we do something along with the E3.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: But I got a couple other things in mind for the E3 because it's I'll talk to you about that later in the world and that one out, so.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: But this week we wanted to talk about the greatest human desire and the greatest human desires to feel loved and appreciated.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: It's the number one human.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: It's the one thing that we all crave.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: We humans are tribal.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: We need to feel like we're appreciated and that we're loved and cared for.
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: And from a leadership perspective, we talk about this over the lines, guy.
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: Like you know, people don't quit jobs, they quit leaders because they don't feel appreciated.
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: So this isn't just loved and appreciated by your significant other, it's every relationship that you have is feeling like you have a place.
• 13:24
  Speaker 1: And when you don't feel loved and appreciated by someone or an organization, it tends to not feel so good.
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: And what we wanted to kind of do this morning is we're kind of really just kind of highlight that and then talk about the love languages, because you know, it wasn't until later in my life that I didn't even know what the love languages were and in the forge we had this topic.
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: We bring it up at least once a year and retake the test.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: Because there are five love languages and if this is the first time hearing them, great.
• 13:55
  Speaker 1: But if you even know what they are great because your love languages change and those around you can change, which we all found out when we retook the test.
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: A few of us had you know a different love language than from a year ago, which we found kind of interesting.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: And if you don't know what the love languages are, you may try to show appreciation and love to someone, but it won't fall the same because you're not speaking their specific language, which is why it is so incredibly important to know what they are.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: So the question that I will read this is one that we've popped up is I feel a consistent and distantly deep, trusting, appreciative, soulful, loving connection to my significant other.
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: I'm patient, respectful, attentive to my partner's needs and, if you're single, I live each day through my heart and demonstrate compassion and love for others.
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: And if you were to rate yourself on a scale of one to 10, you know what would that be and you could modify that for every close relationship in your life.
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: And I like the rating system because it's kind of like.
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: It's hard to like put a data point on it, but when you can rate one through 10, which is often what we use when we have our forge calls it enables you to like just determine, like, where I'm at.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: Am I five, am I an eight, am I?
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: 10?
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: .
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: Like where am I?
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: And it's like you know you usually have a light bulb moment like you know what.
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: I do need to show up in this area a little bit more, or hey, you know what things are going really well over here, yeah.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: So yeah, what do you think about the greatest human desire and feeling, loved and appreciated?
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: Well, so I like the five local excuse me, I like the five love languages, just because it's so easy to understand.
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: And as far as yeah, I mean I found it interesting.
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: Well, I didn't find it interesting, I found it.
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: Actually I kind of knew already at this point in time of my life I scored highest on acts of service.
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: So my highest score was on acts of service and then quality time and physical touch came in number two.
• 16:05
  Speaker 2: They tied number two and that didn't surprise me at all.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: Just knowing me and like I can tell you, probably five years ago physical touch or quality time would have rated higher than acts of service.
• 16:20
  Speaker 2: But right now, the biggest thing that puts a smile on my face and just warms my heart and says, oh my God, that man loves me Is when he goes and takes my car and fills it up with gas for me.
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: I mean that's just the thing that I'm just like, oh my God, he loves me.
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: He puts gas on my car for me, you know.
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: Or if I'm coming home and I'm like, hey, I need gas, he's like I'll meet you at the gas station and he meets me at the gas station and we'll go put my gas for me.
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's just like, and I'm like Yep, I got a winner, I'm keeping him.
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: That's it just makes me feel so loved I always found the acts of service.
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: So bizarre because it's like like yours is filling up the gas.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: I know, for other people it's like I love it when my husband does the dishes, yes, the towels.
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: So so weird that you would find like that much like love and happiness from something, from a task like that.
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what it is and and that's the thing, because I've worked with people and couples and it's like I've, you know, I've been trying to show her I love her with gifts, I've been giving her this and that, because that's my language, and but it's like that's not what does it for them.
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: They want you to go fill up the gas, they want you to go mow the yard or whatever you know, or?
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: Well, let's recap all of the languages real quick.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: So the first one is words of affirmation.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: Words of affirmation, so telling comp and compliments to someone, right?
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: Second one is acts of service, so doing something for someone.
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: The third one is gifts.
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: Fourth is quality time spending good quality time, and then physical touch.
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: So those are, those are the five.
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, those are the five.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: And you have your own love languages.
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: There's a, there's a quiz.
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: If you go to five love languagescom, you can take a free quiz.
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: You need to know what your love language is and realize that your love language isn't the same as other people.
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: And try as hard as you might, we naturally gravitate to what our love language is for love.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: But if it's not the person you're trying to extend it to, as hard as you may, try and you get frustrated, if you, if you're not depositing the right love in the right bank account, it's not going to be reciprocated as well as you think that makes sense, yeah absolutely.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah actually, I had my son and his girlfriend take this test this weekend and we kind of had a chance to talk about it when we went to, had a short little road trip and it was.
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: You know, it's like I said.
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: I like it because it's very simple, it's easy to understand and the concept is easy.
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: You know, it's just like with communication, right, if you're not communicating in a way that is healthy and positive and you and you're both receiving and giving good communication, it's not going to work.
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: And this is the same, essentially the same thing.
• 19:13
  Speaker 2: I mean, it just helps you communicate better, and so you know where where your partner stands and where you stand.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so we take the test that gives you different percentages, because even though you might have a number one, you're also feeling loved with number two and number three.
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know because, I know that, like when I'm, when I work or whatnot, like I'm pretty much a quality time person, but, like from a work perspective, I like words of affirmation a lot.
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's ranked pretty high up there too, and I like to know that I'm doing a good job, yeah, and so the words of affirmation, like in work culture, makes me feel appreciated, so it's good to know that.
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: And about the people that you're around I had my kids take it.
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: You know all I've got triplet daughters and what's been fascinating to me is they've grown up in the exact same environment.
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: They're all completely different people and they each have different love languages and it explained a lot.
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: like Sam gives, like we call him the Sam hugs.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: She'll come up and like squeeze you, like so hard it's almost like take your breath away.
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: And you know, in her love language is is physical touch and that makes a lot of sense.
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: I'll get a hug from her every night before she goes to bed.
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: She's very consistent by it.
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: The other two I will never, hardly ever.
• 20:23
  Speaker 1: I got to remind them or like go chase them down to get a hug.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: So it's, it's just.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: It's quite fascinating how everyone is a little bit different.
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so your acts of service, which Rudy I don't know.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: I'd send it to him and ask him to take it.
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: I don't know if he's taking it yet.
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna take that test bro.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, he's got to take it.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: We're just, I'm just kind of rolling with.
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: he's happy, he seems happy, but yeah it always has a smile on his face.
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: I've never seen someone so happy Generally.
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, he is Interesting.
• 20:59
  Speaker 2: We'll take that test, rudy, that's right, yeah, I'll have to remind him, yeah.
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah.
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it was interesting because, like Lacey, lacey had physical touch, then hers changed to words of affirmation.
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: She kind of called it before she took the test.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: She's like, I think mine have changed and it was words of affirmation, so they can't change.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: That's why it's good to take it every now and then to see where you're at.
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, but, like I said, my physical touch and quality time came in.
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: What was that?
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: What it was?
• 21:29
  Speaker 2: Hold on, let me I have it pulled up here.
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: Words of affirmation and physical touch is what tied words.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: Yes, words of affirmation, and I knew physical touch.
• 21:40
  Speaker 2: Actually, I kind of thought physical touch was high on the high, like would be my highest, just because I mean I, my family.
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: It's so crazy because growing up like my, we all get together and we just like hug each other and laid on each other and we like have to be touching each other.
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: And I mean it's just a thing, like I thought that was normal and all families, you know you go sit on a couch and you don't sit across the couch from someone in your family members, like you sit up next to them and then you know, I mean we're just like all up in each other's space.
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: So I just assumed that's just what we all did.
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: And then I grew up and realized, oh no, you know, a lot of people do not like to be touched.
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: So I've learned to ask, hey, are you a hugger?
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: You know I don't.
• 22:21
  Speaker 2: Now I don't just run up and hug people anymore.
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: Like, can I touch you?
• 22:24
  Speaker 2: I don't know and a lot of people like no, okay.
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: Social distancing wasn't that difficult for them because they've been doing it all their life.
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not as bad as like Brent, but I probably was at one time.
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: I personally have been really working on that myself.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: I'm not naturally a hugger or toucher.
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: I have to think about it.
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: It does feel good to get a hug from somebody, but I find myself like I've got to like kind of force myself to do it because it wasn't something that I grew up with.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: And so it's just, it's just interesting.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: You know people's backgrounds and where they come from and how they do things and yeah.
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: So well, yeah.
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: And I actually I kind of wonder, because it comes so natural that something that I don't even have to think about maybe that's why it's I didn't score number one on that, you know.
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: And it just could be where I'm at in life.
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: But physical touch is always something it's just deeply ingrained in me.
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: I like touching people.
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: When, when, when I talk about this test now here's a pitfall because someone might be listening to this and they're like you know what I like that, so that's, that's gotta be my love language they start thinking about people and they like I think that's that person's love.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: Like I thought the same with my kids.
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: You've got to take the test because if you think what your love language is, it's probably going to be different and those people that you perceive their love language.
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: You got to get them to take the test because what you think is not true.
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: Probably there's a good chance it's not true because people would be like you know what?
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: I felt the same with my kids.
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: I tried to pick it out beforehand.
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: I was, I was wrong.
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: I was wrong.
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: So take the test.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: It literally takes like three minutes.
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: It's not, we got somebody asking for it.
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: We got to link the test in the comments or the show notes because we got somebody that needs a needs a link for that, for that test.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: You can take it for free yeah it's free, you can take it for free and you got one for Good stuff.
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: Absolutely.
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: So yeah, take the love language test.
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: It's a simple, it's a simple thing, but, man, it makes all the difference in the world.
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: Have that knowledge is I?
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: don't know why.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: I don't know why it's not taught like in high school or at an early age.
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: This should be common knowledge.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: I still would cost it when I read the book and I didn't read the book because it sounded gooey and mushy.
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: I'm like Until.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: Actually I was like in my name.
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: Look, I'm not even gonna lie.
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: I'm this books been around a while and I would see it and I'm like yeah, I don't know.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: Read that book.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: No, come to find out like it's so incredibly important, like it should be, like, yeah, something taught in school, it's that important and it's a quick if we could get that, maybe and you know a deep dive into everyday finances for our, you know.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know.
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: I think there won't be a better place with these simple concepts if they were common knowledge.
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, don't get me on a tangent let's, let's, maybe.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: Maybe we could talk about our weekly wake-up winner.
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: Before I go out the rails here and talk about what we Speaking of appreciation.
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: Here.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: We like to appreciate people that are out there getting after it, and let me show my screen here.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: Here we go.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: Oh well, the thing here has changed.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: Oh, streamers, change Are.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: Give me just a second here.
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: What's?
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: going on.
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: What's going on sure?
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: Oh, I see, I see, thank you.
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: Thank you, I'm glad I'm okay too, lacey, thanks, okay is.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: Oh, it gave me more options here.
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: I noticed every now and then I'll log into these systems.
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: Oh, if you've noticed, like you log into zoom, like all the buttons are different anyway, all right, hey here, this week's weekly wake-up winner is Matt Larson.
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: Matt Larson has bitten getting after it.
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: He joined us last year with the March to the Arch he's not March to the Arch, the March to Ukraine or virtual event and he wore his a go-rock yourself shirt to one of the go-rock StarCourse events and if you've never done a go-rock before, highly recommend their Fantastic events.
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: And the StarCourse is no joke.
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: It's a grueling physical event.
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: We're gonna carry a rucksack and you're with a bunch of other like-minded patriotic people choose to led by some special forces, cadre, and they're usually done in a major city.
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: So it's super cool.
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: But Matt Larson has been getting after it.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: He wants to be a shining example for his family and there's a him at a adventure race where he was out there with with one of his young ones out there getting after it.
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: So he's, you know, it's awesome to see people like you know what I want to be inspiring to those around me and I'm gonna start by, you know, focusing on myself to get him my my health and fitness and check and, and, and, being an inspiration to to others.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: So, matt, thank you for what you're doing.
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: We just continue to cheer you on in your journey.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: One honor you by giving you a do hard things nation shirts.
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: So thank you for being a part of the community.
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: Thank you for role modeling the way for those around you and getting after it.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: Thank you, congratulations, matt.
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, getting after it getting after it.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Keep doing hard things, brother.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: I think I first noticed Matt this go around for the E3 challenge.
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: I didn't realize he'd been in in the group.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, last year, since the yeah, he's been around for a minute, so getting after at the E3 challenge, kicking, kicking some tail hair and you know it's awesome.
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: It's always great to be around inspiring People that are getting after it's positive people, right?
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: So we're talking about the other day, like you know, social media conversation in the in the, in the main group.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: It's like you know what social media is really getting me down and I'm really struggling with with just the negativity of the news and other people's opinions about, and that's been a common thing.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: I've noticed that a lot and you got to find a tribe of people that are getting after it, that are positive and you can curate.
• 28:31
  Speaker 1: That's what I love about like, I've never physically met Matt Larson, right, right, but this is cool because he's we're interacting.
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: When you have, when you have a Facebook group, like you can curate your social media and people in your social media can become family to you because there's someone there, people that you interact with.
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: So I guess my point is Surround yourself with the right people and you can curate your social media towards primarily positive people.
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: You can unfollow people, yeah, and that doesn't mean that you have to Unfriend them in real life by unfollowing them, it's just turning the white noise down.
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: I've got people that I love dearly, that I just, politically I don't want to really have a conversation about right, because it's Absolutely but I love the death.
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: I love the death.
• 29:21
  Speaker 1: We just, you know, we don't talk about those topics, or I just don't want to see them.
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: We'll talk about them in appropriate time and place, right, or the news or all the other stuff right now.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you can curate that.
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: So, yes, you can turn the volume down.
• 29:36
  Speaker 2: Turn it down, not on us, turn the volume up on us, yeah, I could have cranked that volume up.
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: But but on all the other negativity, yes, yeah, turn it down.
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: And hey, michelle, thank you so much.
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: She, michelle, says she loves listening to us and it makes us happy and she's inspired by us.
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: I am, I am inspired by Michelle.
• 29:54
  Speaker 2: I met Michelle several several years ago at roller derby and we both lost kind of touch.
• 30:01
  Speaker 2: We both went separate ways and now we've reconnected and she is just kicking butt herself.
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: You inspire me, Michelle, you're kicking butt.
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: She's taking her health into her own hands and she's really just getting out there and getting after it to herself.
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: But to go back to your point on social media, absolutely, guys, unfollow and get that.
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: Unfollow and smash that subscribe button.
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yes.
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: And if you would love to see a whole bunch of selfies of me running and doing things, yes, feel free to send me a find me on social media.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: Actually, you don't even have I gotta just follow me, because you don't even have to send me a friend request, because everything's public and you'll see me dying.
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: I promise you I don't.
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: You'll never see an over filtered photo of me.
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: Actually, it's completely the opposite.
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: I'm not sure if you can see it, but I'm not sure.
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: I'm not sure, I'm not sure.
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: Filtered photo of me.
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: Actually, it's completely the opposite.
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: I try to find the worst photos ever, especially right after I've done a workout or something.
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: I'll just take a selfie and that way, when you see me in real life, you're like, wow, she cleans up very nicely.
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: It is never the opposite.
• 31:05
  Speaker 2: Like you're never going to be like.
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: Is that her?
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: I can't really tell, cause normally she looks like a plastic Barbie something or the other.
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: Nope, you're going to, you're really going to be blown away by actually how, how decent I look in real life compared to social media.
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: You posted a video like from you from a few years ago, I think.
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah.
• 31:26
  Speaker 1: Uh, lacey and I were talking like she's like, she's like this is Angie.
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: I'm like looking at it, it took me a minute.
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: I'm like that's Angie, and cause I didn't know you before your big transformation, weight loss and um, it's just, it's just really cool to see you Like.
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: I see Jeff Knowles same thing, Like.
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: I know, I only know, you know, jeff, the one that's been kind of getting after it, not the previous version.
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's fascinating to me every time I see.
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, absolutely Jeff.
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, we love, yeah, dude, I love watching and he's just so happy and inspiring and motivating.
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: If you want to follow somebody, that's just on it.
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: Jeffrey Knowles, jeffrey, is that Jeffrey?
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: With that's Jeffrey, the G G E.
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: O Jeff was a G.
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: Jeffrey Yep.
• 32:09
  Speaker 2: Jeffrey Knowles, yes, yes.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: Anyway, you want to get connected with the right minded people.
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: Make sure you join the Facebook group and uh, and that's it.
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: What are you going to do the rest of uh presence day?
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: Oh gosh, it is going to be man.
• 32:24
  Speaker 2: I okay, I know we're past our 30 minutes.
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry guys, I just I'm just going long.
• 32:29
  Speaker 2: It's all good Chit chatty this morning.
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: It's going to be beautiful outside.
• 32:32
  Speaker 2: If you're here in Missouri, mid Missouri, get your butt outside.
• 32:35
  Speaker 2: It's going to be in the sixties.
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: So, if anything, if you've got a dog, go walk your dog, get your dog outside.
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: Go walk yourself, go walk your friends, go run, go and just enjoy.
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: Just go sit outside and enjoy being outside, because it is beautiful.
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: I, I was thinking about this yesterday, last year.
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: I'm getting these memories popping up and from, uh, tajji, last year I was in I call it my blanket coat, my super puffy coat that goes all the way down to my ankles because it was so cold outside and I'm like man, I'm hoping that we have this really nice weather.
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: Um, I hope it lasts.
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: I don't go back to the super cold but, to answer your question, I'm going to get outside and get after it today.
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: Get those Tajji miles in.
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: I think I'm in the 70 something percent right now.
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: So maybe I really want to get a half marathon in.
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: So I don't know, nice, maybe I'll do that.
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: I don't know.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: Just just, I feel like just wing a half marathon whenever I want.
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: This is not a great place to be in life You're going to get this journey.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: Like I think I'll do a half marathon, maybe I won't, maybe I'll, that's good.
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean, you know, that's hey.
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: You never know when you're going to need to do it.
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: So I tell my runners.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: you know I try to get them prepared, like always be prepared for a half marathon where you could even if it was a challenge and you could still do it right, and that's that's a good place to be, that's really good place in your fitness to be.
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: I can do half marathon.
• 33:50
  Speaker 2: My goal is to be able to say I just want to do a 50 K today.
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: That's my goal, because I can.
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: I know I can go out and do a half marathon and not die tomorrow, you know and be fine.
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: But I want that.
• 34:02
  Speaker 2: I want to be able to say next year, 50 K, yep, yeah, I'm just going to go out and do a 50 K.
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: Awesome.
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: Well, I already gave my kids heads up like hey, they're off school, so we're going to go and get outside at some point today, so we're going to hop in and go go do some stuff and we go hike around somewhere.
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: So oh, cool.
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so I'm looking forward to that Well and that's it.
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: So, oh man, yeah, no, I was just going to remind you and everyone else to make sure, no matter what you're doing, make someone smile today.
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: Do something that makes you and someone else smile today, make your kids smile today.
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: Jay, I will get him out there.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I will make Lacey's Great, Great advice.
• 34:38
  Speaker 1: Lacey unfortunately went home yesterday, but I will call her and she's on here this morning, so it's going to say you can base her.
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: I'll make her smile.
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: I love her smile.
• 34:46
  Speaker 2: She's got a great smile.
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: She has a fantastic smile.
• 34:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she does?
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: She's contagious yeah.
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I like her smile, so all right.
• 34:55
  Speaker 1: Well, hey, that's it for today's episode.
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: Enjoy your president's day.
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: Take the five love languages test.
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: Make sure you take that drink more water.
• 35:03
  Speaker 2: Drink more water, drink more water.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: Drink more water and we will see you guys in the next episode.
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: Do our things, yes.