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Transcript

Check In: Holiday Special · Heavyweight

• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Pushkin, how are we?
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: How are we onm I run this morning there were
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: like tiny little flurries. That's like the first little bit
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: of snow this year.
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I noticed like a single snowflake.
• 0:42
  Speaker 4: Well that's wonderful. Did you try to catch that snowflake
• 0:44
  Speaker 4: on your tongue?
• 0:45
  Speaker 3: No, I had a mask on. You're trying to trick me.
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: Ah, that's right, but no, no.
• 0:51
  Speaker 4: No, Honestly, I feel like I'm also trying to trick
• 0:55
  Speaker 4: my four year old into liking Khanuka. Yeah, did you
• 1:00
  Speaker 4: guys know that last night was the first night I did.
• 1:03
  Speaker 3: Of course.
• 1:03
  Speaker 4: So we got these uh inflatable balloons that spell out Lahaiad.
• 1:10
  Speaker 4: That sounds amazing, And so we had some fun trying
• 1:14
  Speaker 4: to teach AUGI how to pronounce lakaiama.
• 1:17
  Speaker 5: Try to say, what a nice it's lachai am.
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: So, because Emily celebrates Christmas, there's a Christmas tree in
• 1:37
  Speaker 4: the house, and I pulled out like this small little
• 1:40
  Speaker 4: manora that we have that my father bought me from
• 1:43
  Speaker 4: his trip to Israel in like the nineteen eighties, and
• 1:48
  Speaker 4: so I'm like, isn't the manora just as cool as
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: a Christmas Tree's what's so funny Papa joking Kaki, like
• 1:59
  Speaker 4: he actually thought I was making a joke. I made
• 2:04
  Speaker 4: a good show of it. I explained the miracle of Hanukkah,
• 2:07
  Speaker 4: which is like how the temple only had enough oil
• 2:09
  Speaker 4: for one day, but it lasted seven. And he wasn't
• 2:12
  Speaker 4: He was not impressed.
• 2:14
  Speaker 3: Like Chase, he doesn't understand how oil works.
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: Who understands how oil works?
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: Like reindeer flying, that's a miracle, like Santa Claus fitting
• 2:22
  Speaker 4: down a chimney, immaculate conception, but like the whole thing
• 2:25
  Speaker 4: about oil, Like he was just like.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: I don't know what that means.
• 2:29
  Speaker 4: In the olden days, before they had electricity, all they.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: Had was oil.
• 2:33
  Speaker 4: So we lit it and we said some prayers, and
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: then we ate night the Jewish Deli food. And that
• 2:41
  Speaker 4: is something that Aggie definitely loves.
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: To think about. What I'm gonna do for the holidays.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: I'm really hoping to get to see my grandparents somehow.
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: My grandparents are ninety five years old. Well yeah, and
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: with COVID, I haven't seen them in so long. I
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: do try to call them though. I called my grandma
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: actually the other day. Hello, Hello, who is this? It's
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: Stevie oh.
• 3:37
  Speaker 6: I just hold on a minute.
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: I heard these like loud noises in the background. Am
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: I interrupting something?
• 3:45
  Speaker 7: No.
• 3:45
  Speaker 6: We was sitting in a garage and this one couple
• 3:48
  Speaker 6: drove over and they're sitting on the driveway. But they've
• 3:51
  Speaker 6: been here an hour already and they're supposed to leave
• 3:55
  Speaker 6: an hour's enough.
• 3:57
  Speaker 8: So thank you.
• 3:58
  Speaker 6: This gives me. I was at the eleven take care
• 4:00
  Speaker 6: of it? Oh yeah, yeah, how do you get company
• 4:03
  Speaker 6: to leave?
• 4:05
  Speaker 2: They are seeing some friends at a distance outside, even
• 4:09
  Speaker 2: though it's so cold. So I was like, maybe there's
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: a way we can do that, and immediately she was
• 4:15
  Speaker 2: like most concerned about the way she's gonna look. So like,
• 4:19
  Speaker 2: my grandma is someone who takes a lot of pride
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: in her appearance, Like she's very put together. She's always
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: boasting about how she's the only one of her friends
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: who can still wear heels, and she's been saying that
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: since like she was seventy years old, you know, and
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: you know, like pre pandemic. She would go regularly to
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: get her hair dyed at a salon. So when I
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: was on the phone with her talking about this hypothetical
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: visit where we'd both be bundled up in hats and scarves. Anyway,
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: she was very worried about her hair.
• 4:51
  Speaker 6: But this pandemic going around my gray is showing Grandma.
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry, but you're ninety five years old. Like I
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: think the jig is up. I think people know that
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: you're probably gray.
• 5:04
  Speaker 6: I am gray.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: While we were on the subject of it reminded me
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: of this story, something I actually still think about a lot.
• 5:15
  Speaker 2: So when I was six or seven, I was staying
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: with them in their house and I woke up early
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: in the morning and I walked right into their bedroom
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: and I didn't knock her anything, and my grandpa was
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: there in front of the mirror, like at his dresser,
• 5:29
  Speaker 2: and I was like, you know, hey, Grandpa, and he
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: noticed me, and immediately he was like super flustered and
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: grabbed this thing off the dresser and like held it
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: to his head and was like, you know, like clearly
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: he didn't want me to see him, which is how
• 5:45
  Speaker 2: I learned that actually my grandpa is bald, and where's
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: a two pey? And I remember in that moment, I
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: knew I'd seen something I wasn't supposed to write, like
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: like almost like I'd walked in on him. Naked or something.
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: It was that kind of feeling, yeah, like like, oh,
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: that was a private moment that I wasn't supposed to see.
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: And it was like very clear that he was embarrassed,
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: and it was almost like it scared me kind of, you.
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: Know, because you never seen your grandfather react in that way.
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: Oh No, And my grandfather is like such a mild
• 6:20
  Speaker 2: mannered person. I think he's the one who always wants
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: to make sure that everyone is okay. And you know,
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: for him to kind of like yell or ask me
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: to leave, I mean that's like never before and ever
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: since kind of a thing. Yeah, And I just turned
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: and like ran out. I ran into the den and
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: like buried my face in the couch cushions and just
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: was like like hysterically crying.
• 6:47
  Speaker 4: It was like your family was trying to protect you
• 6:49
  Speaker 4: from the horrors of baldness.
• 6:55
  Speaker 2: Eventually, my grandma found me and she kind of held
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: me and explained, you know, like this is something that
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: Grandpa's sensitive about, and like that's why he wears a wig.
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: I think she called it a wig, you know, I
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: didn't know what it to pay was like that's why.
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: He wears a wid something about a wig sun. So
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: let's like it's like he's like in costume or something
• 7:14
  Speaker 3: that's us signified.
• 7:17
  Speaker 6: I know he was horrified because not we're mis supposed
• 7:20
  Speaker 6: to all.
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: Do you think I could talk to him about it
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: and that would be okay?
• 7:25
  Speaker 6: Yes, as a matter of fact, I'd be interested to
• 7:28
  Speaker 6: him what he said about it.
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: I didn't even know if he would remember it, or
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: if he did. I was sort of worried that it
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: might still embarrass him, right, I mean we never I
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: never spoke to him about it.
• 7:41
  Speaker 4: You never talked to your grandfather about it?
• 7:43
  Speaker 9: No?
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: No, I mean clearly it was like reboting. But a
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: few days later, I called my.
• 7:49
  Speaker 9: Grandpa, good afternoon.
• 7:54
  Speaker 2: Good afternoon yourself.
• 7:55
  Speaker 9: What's happening? So?
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: Uh oh, sorry, I'm I'm a little nervous to talk
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: to you about this. I have to be honest.
• 8:08
  Speaker 9: Oh really?
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 8:10
  Speaker 9: Should I be nervous about talking him to you about this? Oh?
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: Okay, go ahead, Okay, I wanted to talk to you
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: about something. I explained to him why I was calling,
• 8:23
  Speaker 2: and I retold him the story about the day I
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: learned he was bald, and he remembered it.
• 8:28
  Speaker 9: Yes, I remember, to think for you in fact.
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: But immediately. He just did what he always does, which
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: is just tried to make me feel better about it.
• 8:37
  Speaker 7: Don't be embarrassed anymore. Forget about it, forget about it.
• 8:41
  Speaker 7: You know, it was it was a part of my vanity,
• 8:46
  Speaker 7: but it was, you know, in retrospect, it probably was silly.
• 8:50
  Speaker 7: It was. It was an expensive affectation. But it's over.
• 8:58
  Speaker 7: I may be at a point in my life where
• 9:01
  Speaker 7: I say that's it. I'm going to go the rest
• 9:04
  Speaker 7: of the way without it.
• 9:05
  Speaker 9: Yeah.
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: Do you feel like as you've gotten older, like your vanity,
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: do you feel like that's dropped away?
• 9:12
  Speaker 9: Yeah? I think that it's uh yahn JD. Can I
• 9:17
  Speaker 9: interjection in it?
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: My grandma, I didn't even know what's there.
• 9:21
  Speaker 6: Listen, I want to add one little thing. When you
• 9:26
  Speaker 6: talk about Grandpa and that he's not vain, but let
• 9:29
  Speaker 6: me tell you. When they're home in the house, like
• 9:32
  Speaker 6: right now, both of us not seeing anybody, Grandpa.
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: Wears a cap and he doesn't take it off. He
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: wears a cap like a baseball cap.
• 9:46
  Speaker 6: Yes, here we are, I'm making the bed and he's
• 9:49
  Speaker 6: watching TV.
• 9:50
  Speaker 9: But there's a white cap on his head. My dame,
• 9:53
  Speaker 9: not ding no no.
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: But he always wears a cat.
• 9:58
  Speaker 6: You know something, we all have a bit of vanity.
• 10:01
  Speaker 6: We all look in the mirror and want to see
• 10:04
  Speaker 6: what we want to see. Of course, Grandpa and I
• 10:06
  Speaker 6: would like to see twenty years off their faces. But
• 10:09
  Speaker 6: so we're all a little vain, I think.
• 10:12
  Speaker 9: So.
• 10:15
  Speaker 6: I was just reminded of story, and I think it's
• 10:18
  Speaker 6: a story you can tell on your iPod.
• 10:20
  Speaker 9: Because it's hysterical. I tell it all the time.
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: Go ahead.
• 10:25
  Speaker 6: We went to a pool and you were learning to swim,
• 10:29
  Speaker 6: and you wanted to swim at the deep end.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: How old was I You.
• 10:33
  Speaker 6: Must have been around maybe six or seven year so
• 10:37
  Speaker 6: you said, I have to swim with you. So what
• 10:41
  Speaker 6: could I do? My granddaughter asked, So I jumped in
• 10:43
  Speaker 6: the water and I went and I swam with you
• 10:46
  Speaker 6: to the deep end and back. And when we got out,
• 10:50
  Speaker 6: you looked at me like with your eyes wide open
• 10:55
  Speaker 6: and your mouth up, and I said, what's the matter
• 10:59
  Speaker 6: and you said nothing, Only now you look like a
• 11:03
  Speaker 6: grandma talk about the.
• 11:06
  Speaker 9: Day with my hair wet.
• 11:07
  Speaker 6: I looked horrible, And that's.
• 11:08
  Speaker 9: What you said.
• 11:14
  Speaker 6: Okay, sweetie, I'll give him back to you as grandpa.
• 11:18
  Speaker 7: Okay, that's been that's been my life for seventy five years.
• 11:25
  Speaker 9: I get to talk, she has to get a word.
• 11:37
  Speaker 4: Huh, seventy five years.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and they've known each other since they were thirteen.
• 11:43
  Speaker 9: Whoa.
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: They both lived in the Bronx and they met in
• 11:47
  Speaker 2: the neighborhood. It was really sweet. At one point I
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: asked him what the thing is that he missed the
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: most about New York when he left the city.
• 11:57
  Speaker 7: Well, that's a good question. I didn't really miss much.
• 12:03
  Speaker 7: I took your grandma with me and that was that
• 12:06
  Speaker 7: was enough.
• 12:15
  Speaker 4: You know what the best thing about being bald is
• 12:17
  Speaker 4: if I may. I had the experience a few days
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: ago where Aggie kissed me on my head and it
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: was like the most tender like almost like a I
• 12:27
  Speaker 4: don't know, like a paternal thing like. I was very
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: surprised that he did it, and I was thinking, like
• 12:31
  Speaker 4: if I, if I had hair, I wouldn't have been
• 12:33
  Speaker 4: able to feel that kiss in the same way.
• 12:36
  Speaker 8: Well that's nice.
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I still wish I had my hair.
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: But Stevie, it's funny that your story was about your grandparents,
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: because I actually also have a story involving grandparents. Oh
• 13:00
  Speaker 3: and it involves a long marriage as well.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: Let's hear it.
• 13:04
  Speaker 9: YEA.
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: So I was talking to this guy named PACs And
• 13:09
  Speaker 3: and he was telling me that he a couple of
• 13:13
  Speaker 3: years ago moved across the country to Cleveland for school,
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: so he didn't know anyone. It was kind of a
• 13:19
  Speaker 3: weird transitional time. And he was walking in this big
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: cemetery called Lakeview.
• 13:27
  Speaker 10: And I saw this headstone that said listen for my
• 13:31
  Speaker 10: football in your heart. What does that mean even exactly,
• 13:36
  Speaker 10: I don't really know, like listen for my football in
• 13:40
  Speaker 10: your heart.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: It's I don't know.
• 13:42
  Speaker 10: I just could imagine like Grandpa just really sincerely loving
• 13:46
  Speaker 10: football and leaving that message. So I think it just
• 13:51
  Speaker 10: delighted me and it made me think about my grandparents.
• 13:54
  Speaker 10: And my phone was really low on battery and I
• 13:57
  Speaker 10: had been saving it so that I could like find
• 14:00
  Speaker 10: my way back if I needed to. But I was like,
• 14:03
  Speaker 10: this is worth it.
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: He took a picture, and the second he took the picture,
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: his phone died. So he just have this one picture
• 14:10
  Speaker 3: and it wasn't like amazing, like it was a little blurry,
• 14:15
  Speaker 3: but he just found a lot of comfort in this
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: headstone that said listen for my football in your heart,
• 14:20
  Speaker 3: and like loved the absurdity of it. And it was
• 14:24
  Speaker 3: a headstone for this man named Don, and PACKS just
• 14:28
  Speaker 3: started thinking about Don a lot because he had this
• 14:31
  Speaker 3: picture of him. It's this like sweet old man who
• 14:33
  Speaker 3: just loved football so much.
• 14:35
  Speaker 10: And so for the last like two years, every once
• 14:39
  Speaker 10: in a while I'll like pull up that picture and
• 14:42
  Speaker 10: show people and be like, I found this weird headstone
• 14:47
  Speaker 10: about football that just pleases me.
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: Did other people like find it as delightful as you did?
• 14:55
  Speaker 10: I don't think they really did. I think I was
• 14:59
  Speaker 10: particularly tickled by it, and people were just like, oh,
• 15:02
  Speaker 10: that's cool. Even in dark times, I would sometimes it
• 15:07
  Speaker 10: sounds really silly. I would just be like, I'm having
• 15:11
  Speaker 10: a hard time, but at least there's a headstone out
• 15:14
  Speaker 10: there that says listen for my football.
• 15:15
  Speaker 9: In your heart.
• 15:16
  Speaker 10: And I had gone back a couple times and like
• 15:19
  Speaker 10: looked for it, and I had never found it.
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: So flash forward to this year, the year twenty twenty
• 15:26
  Speaker 3: packed hae stuck at home like everyone, and one morning.
• 15:31
  Speaker 10: I woke up and had like symptoms that could be
• 15:35
  Speaker 10: of COVID, like a sore throat, and my roommates and
• 15:39
  Speaker 10: I take it very seriously, so immediately I got tested
• 15:43
  Speaker 10: and was quarantined in my bedroom. Had not furnished it yet,
• 15:47
  Speaker 10: so it just has a bed in it. So it
• 15:50
  Speaker 10: was just four days of sitting on my bed pretty
• 15:53
  Speaker 10: much and only allowed to leave to go to the bathroom.
• 15:56
  Speaker 3: What were you eating?
• 15:58
  Speaker 10: I was just eating frozen meals from trading. Jep would
• 16:04
  Speaker 10: just leave my room to microwave them and then bring
• 16:06
  Speaker 10: them back into my room.
• 16:09
  Speaker 4: Really like drove me a little crazy.
• 16:12
  Speaker 3: So it's kind of like a dark couple days. And
• 16:15
  Speaker 3: then he gets his test results and they're negative, and
• 16:19
  Speaker 3: so he's like so relieved, and immediately he calls up
• 16:22
  Speaker 3: his sister and is like, I can leave my room.
• 16:25
  Speaker 3: Lets meet up at the cemetery and go for a walk.
• 16:27
  Speaker 10: So it was a very like cathartic, like first time
• 16:31
  Speaker 10: I had been outside in a while, and it was
• 16:35
  Speaker 10: a beautiful day, and I was like, we should look
• 16:39
  Speaker 10: for listen for my football in your Heart, and we
• 16:43
  Speaker 10: found it and I was really ecstatic. And then she
• 16:48
  Speaker 10: was like I'm disappointed, and I was like what And
• 16:52
  Speaker 10: I looked back at it and it said listen for
• 16:54
  Speaker 10: my footfall in your Heart with an ax.
• 17:01
  Speaker 3: The stone itself was like a little bit modeled, so
• 17:04
  Speaker 3: for all these years, like he just had been misreading it,
• 17:07
  Speaker 3: and because the picture he'd taken was a little blurry.
• 17:09
  Speaker 3: When he showed it to people and was like it
• 17:11
  Speaker 3: said listen for my football, they just would be like, oh, yeah,
• 17:14
  Speaker 3: I guess that is what it says.
• 17:15
  Speaker 10: And then, weirdly enough, as soon as I noticed that
• 17:19
  Speaker 10: I had misread it, it like immediately started raining really hard,
• 17:25
  Speaker 10: and I took a picture really quickly and then ran
• 17:28
  Speaker 10: home and was soaking wet. I feel like it was
• 17:32
  Speaker 10: disappointing for like zero point five seconds, and then it was.
• 17:37
  Speaker 10: It just made it even more delightful that I had
• 17:40
  Speaker 10: misread this headstone, and like that misreading had gotten me
• 17:46
  Speaker 10: to think about it for two years. I think right now,
• 17:52
  Speaker 10: especially human connection is kind of a rare thing, and
• 17:57
  Speaker 10: it was this stranger that I had forged a connection
• 18:01
  Speaker 10: with felt special. There's two names on the headstone, and
• 18:12
  Speaker 10: Don passed away in twenty sixteen, and then the other
• 18:15
  Speaker 10: name is I think it's pronounced Sheila has not passed away.
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: So Pax assumes that Sheila is Don's widow.
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: Uh huh.
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: And even though now he knows that it's foot to
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: fall and not foot to ball, like knowing what it
• 18:30
  Speaker 3: says really hasn't made him any less curious about it,
• 18:34
  Speaker 3: because now his question is like, well, why did Don
• 18:37
  Speaker 3: choose this? Like why was this the thing that he
• 18:39
  Speaker 3: wanted to impart as his final message? And Pax wants
• 18:44
  Speaker 3: to ask Sheila about it, but he's kind of afraid
• 18:47
  Speaker 3: to do it.
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: Right, I mean that's kind of an awkward call.
• 18:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, right, So like, so I decided I would reach
• 18:53
  Speaker 3: out to her, but it was like, this doesn't feel
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: like a phone call people make like it. I don't know,
• 18:59
  Speaker 3: it just felt like what I'm going to call up
• 19:01
  Speaker 3: this grieving woman and be like, someone thought your dead
• 19:03
  Speaker 3: husband's gravestone was funny?
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: Right?
• 19:07
  Speaker 3: And then I had some trouble even getting hold of her,
• 19:09
  Speaker 3: Like I called a few phone numbers that I really
• 19:11
  Speaker 3: thought were right and they weren't. And then I wrote
• 19:14
  Speaker 3: her on Facebook, but it seemed like she hadn't seen
• 19:16
  Speaker 3: the message. Uh, And so finally I wrote her this
• 19:20
  Speaker 3: letter saying I wanted to talk about Don's gravestone.
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: Like a like a handwritten like snail mail.
• 19:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And Sheila got back to me and said that
• 19:29
  Speaker 3: she was up to talk. Well, Hi, it's just Sheila, Yes, Hi,
• 19:37
  Speaker 3: it's Telila calling for oh hi. Oh is that a cat?
• 19:41
  Speaker 8: Yeah? When he knows I'm on the phone, he has
• 19:44
  Speaker 8: to like get in the middle of it.
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: I was thinking Don had chosen this quote, but it
• 19:49
  Speaker 3: turns out that Sheila chose to quote Oh wow. Don
• 19:53
  Speaker 3: had had a chronic illness for a few years before
• 19:56
  Speaker 3: his death.
• 19:57
  Speaker 8: He didn't want to talk about you know, what to
• 19:59
  Speaker 8: do about theuterals or because I'm going to be gone.
• 20:04
  Speaker 8: You figured it out, you know, it's like thankful lot, honey.
• 20:08
  Speaker 3: After Don died, she chose like the cemetery, which, like
• 20:11
  Speaker 3: I said, is this beautiful big cemetery. And she chose
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: this like really nice little spot on the nature path
• 20:17
  Speaker 3: with like a birdhouse right there and a little bridge
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: over some water.
• 20:20
  Speaker 8: I knew that he would like it. He also was
• 20:22
  Speaker 8: a big bird fan, loved feeding the birds, loved having
• 20:26
  Speaker 8: indoor birds, and so I liked the idea of the birdhouse.
• 20:31
  Speaker 8: There were a lot of reasons I liked that spot.
• 20:34
  Speaker 3: She chose for the headstone like a natural boulder, so
• 20:38
  Speaker 3: that's why it was kind of modeled in that way,
• 20:40
  Speaker 3: because it's just like a rock. So she has to
• 20:43
  Speaker 3: decide what to put on the stone, and she asks
• 20:46
  Speaker 3: her friend, who's a poet, to send some suggestions, and
• 20:49
  Speaker 3: her friend just sends this long list for she let
• 20:52
  Speaker 3: to pick from quotes from.
• 20:53
  Speaker 8: Novels, quotes from poems, quotes from rock and roll songs
• 20:57
  Speaker 8: like John Lennon and stuff like that. But the one
• 20:59
  Speaker 8: that I've picked actually is from a novel called The
• 21:03
  Speaker 8: Smoke Jumper, and it's by Nicholas Evans. The inscription says,
• 21:07
  Speaker 8: listen for my footfall and your heart. I am not gone,
• 21:11
  Speaker 8: but simply walk within you.
• 21:13
  Speaker 3: I was a little bit nervous to be like, well,
• 21:16
  Speaker 3: he thought it said football like that, that would be
• 21:18
  Speaker 3: just like totally disrespectful. But she didn't take it that way.
• 21:22
  Speaker 8: Oh that's great.
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: Do you think he would have sounded entertaining to think
• 21:28
  Speaker 3: of it being football?
• 21:29
  Speaker 9: Oh?
• 21:29
  Speaker 8: Yeah, I think he would have thought that was this hilarious.
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 21:32
  Speaker 8: He loved telling jokes, you know, dirty jokes and funny
• 21:36
  Speaker 8: jokes and stupid jokes, dad jokes. He always got to
• 21:40
  Speaker 8: kick out of making people laugh. Sometimes I was I
• 21:43
  Speaker 8: would be shushing him because I was thinking he'd be
• 21:46
  Speaker 8: telling inappropriate jokes and mixed company or with little kids around,
• 21:49
  Speaker 8: and he didn't care about that stuff. He wasn't much
• 21:52
  Speaker 8: of a rule follower, faked his way into the army.
• 21:55
  Speaker 8: He's blind in one eye, but he memorized that I
• 21:57
  Speaker 8: charged to get into the army.
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: Oh really, Yeah?
• 22:02
  Speaker 3: How how long were you guys married for? And how
• 22:05
  Speaker 3: did you meet?
• 22:07
  Speaker 8: We were married for almost forty one years. He died
• 22:11
  Speaker 8: the week before our anniversary.
• 22:14
  Speaker 3: They initially met at this deli where Don worked, and
• 22:18
  Speaker 3: he saw her across the room and decided that he
• 22:20
  Speaker 3: wanted to go out with her, and.
• 22:23
  Speaker 8: We went out that same week and got married six
• 22:26
  Speaker 8: weeks later. Wow, that's shack to everybody. Of course, you know,
• 22:31
  Speaker 8: we got all the usual. You know, that's not a
• 22:34
  Speaker 8: good idea. You guys aren't going to stay married. You
• 22:37
  Speaker 8: don't even hardly know each other, and blah blah blah
• 22:39
  Speaker 8: blah blah.
• 22:40
  Speaker 3: But I guess you showed them.
• 22:46
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 22:47
  Speaker 9: Was that.
• 22:48
  Speaker 3: Out of character for you to fall into something that quickly?
• 22:51
  Speaker 8: Yes, it just seemed to be kind of out of
• 22:54
  Speaker 8: our control. As silly as that sounds when you say it.
• 22:59
  Speaker 3: Was there something scary about that?
• 23:02
  Speaker 8: No, be as there wasn't anything scary about him, you know,
• 23:05
  Speaker 8: I mean, you just you just like immediately comfortable with them,
• 23:09
  Speaker 8: and you know, it was just it was easy to do.
• 23:14
  Speaker 8: I miss him Alion, So I do know that I
• 23:16
  Speaker 8: miss him so much. Just a generous, a real generous person. Yeah,
• 23:23
  Speaker 8: and then now we've got this cod COVID and then
• 23:26
  Speaker 8: just the fact that people can't go anywhere. Now I'm
• 23:29
  Speaker 8: here by myself in this house, you know, And if
• 23:32
  Speaker 8: it would have been so much, so much more satisfying
• 23:37
  Speaker 8: to me if I had him to bounce all this
• 23:39
  Speaker 8: stuff off of, because a lot of things that I
• 23:42
  Speaker 8: took seriously, he would laugh at there's nothing you can
• 23:45
  Speaker 8: do about it, So what do you don't worry about it?
• 23:47
  Speaker 8: He would say, so, but you know, there's just even
• 23:50
  Speaker 8: if it had been a hugely good four years, I
• 23:54
  Speaker 8: would have missed sharing that too.
• 23:59
  Speaker 3: I just really enjoyed talking to her, And before we
• 24:01
  Speaker 3: got off the phone, I kind of was like, you know,
• 24:04
  Speaker 3: thank you for talking to They note it's an emotional
• 24:07
  Speaker 3: subject to get into.
• 24:09
  Speaker 8: Well, it is, it is. But I like talking about
• 24:13
  Speaker 8: don I do, And it's it's just it's just a
• 24:16
  Speaker 8: way to keep them with you and keep them alive,
• 24:18
  Speaker 8: you know, keep talking. There were so many good quotes
• 24:24
  Speaker 8: that could have been inscriptions too, but I chose this
• 24:27
  Speaker 8: one part for it seemed I thought it would comfort
• 24:31
  Speaker 8: our daughter and grandchildren the most, and really anybody that
• 24:36
  Speaker 8: walked by the whole idea of remembering someone being the
• 24:41
  Speaker 8: important thing and that and that really they don't leave
• 24:45
  Speaker 8: you that way. You know you've gotten so much from them,
• 24:48
  Speaker 8: You've shared so much. You remember their jokes, you remember
• 24:52
  Speaker 8: their laugh, you remember so many things. But with the
• 24:56
  Speaker 8: physical person gone, you you have your memories, which which
• 25:01
  Speaker 8: you know are in your heart. Nobody's ever gone, if
• 25:04
  Speaker 8: you remember right.
• 25:33
  Speaker 4: I've always thought of myself as a man of letters. Sure,
• 25:36
  Speaker 4: the kind of letters you assemble into words that can
• 25:39
  Speaker 4: be spoken into a microphone, but also the kind of
• 25:42
  Speaker 4: letters you place in an envelope or is it envelope?
• 25:47
  Speaker 4: Since I was a kid, getting mail has always felt exciting,
• 25:51
  Speaker 4: and it still does, be it a birthday card or
• 25:53
  Speaker 4: a postcard. Opening the mailbox and finding something inside always
• 25:57
  Speaker 4: feels like an occasion. So when USPS offered to sponsor
• 26:01
  Speaker 4: a conversation between me and my friend Craig, one of
• 26:05
  Speaker 4: the country's thousands of Postal Service workers delivering millions of
• 26:08
  Speaker 4: pieces mail each day, I was delighted. Craig loves his
• 26:13
  Speaker 4: job and I love hearing about his job. So here
• 26:16
  Speaker 4: we are me and Craig catching up about his work
• 26:19
  Speaker 4: during the holidays.
• 26:26
  Speaker 11: The holidays, I mean, it's the busiest time of year,
• 26:28
  Speaker 11: but there is just something to the feel of being
• 26:31
  Speaker 11: out as the sun's coming up and you're leaving a
• 26:33
  Speaker 11: package on somebody's front door. And I always think it's
• 26:36
  Speaker 11: a special treat because if people have left their holiday lights,
• 26:40
  Speaker 11: you know, their houses decorated outside. If they leave them
• 26:42
  Speaker 11: on overnight and you're out delivering those packages early in
• 26:45
  Speaker 11: the morning, it's like, oh, I finally get to see
• 26:47
  Speaker 11: this big, beautiful light display that you know, during the day,
• 26:50
  Speaker 11: it just doesn't have the same magical glow.
• 26:52
  Speaker 4: And over the years, have you gotten to know any
• 26:55
  Speaker 4: of the people that you serve?
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: Definitely.
• 26:58
  Speaker 11: I can think of one customer in particular where the
• 26:59
  Speaker 11: kids writing a note just saying how thankful they were
• 27:03
  Speaker 11: for the work that I do. And I think that's
• 27:05
  Speaker 11: always a real special thing when you realize how much
• 27:08
  Speaker 11: the kids appreciate what we're doing, and so they'll come
• 27:12
  Speaker 11: out with you know, the mom be sitting on the
• 27:14
  Speaker 11: front step and know it okay if he gets to
• 27:16
  Speaker 11: ask you a few questions today and I'm like, oh, sure,
• 27:18
  Speaker 11: I got time. What do you want to know? And
• 27:20
  Speaker 11: it's always fun to hear, like.
• 27:21
  Speaker 4: What are some of the questions that you'll get?
• 27:23
  Speaker 11: Well, it's funny now that I say that they want
• 27:25
  Speaker 11: to know about mailman stuff. But the last little kid
• 27:27
  Speaker 11: that he wanted to know all about my home life.
• 27:29
  Speaker 11: You know, he's like, well, what do you do when
• 27:30
  Speaker 11: you get home? What are you having for dinner?
• 27:32
  Speaker 4: It's so interesting, Yeah, because like you're a little like
• 27:34
  Speaker 4: a superhero and it's like he wants to know about
• 27:36
  Speaker 4: your secret identity.
• 27:37
  Speaker 11: Yeah, he was definitely curious about the fact that I
• 27:40
  Speaker 11: drive to a house and had to make dinner and
• 27:42
  Speaker 11: all that kind of stuff. But otherwise it's more the
• 27:47
  Speaker 11: logistics of the job. What's in the mail bag? You know,
• 27:49
  Speaker 11: we're curious satchel and how do we know what mail
• 27:52
  Speaker 11: to give to who?
• 27:53
  Speaker 4: And that kind of thing. Those are good questions. Does
• 27:55
  Speaker 4: it give you a boost?
• 27:56
  Speaker 11: Oh definitely, it makes a big difference. I mean, I
• 27:59
  Speaker 11: just think that to have interactions with people makes the
• 28:02
  Speaker 11: job something special. You know, if you delivered to apartments
• 28:06
  Speaker 11: where they're seniors that live there, I mean, I think
• 28:08
  Speaker 11: that Some of the closest gotten to with customers are
• 28:13
  Speaker 11: older people. You know, the mail is often a big
• 28:16
  Speaker 11: part of the day when you're older. Those are the
• 28:19
  Speaker 11: people that I you know, that I do my best
• 28:21
  Speaker 11: to have, you know, even if it is just a
• 28:23
  Speaker 11: wave through the window or just giving them a thumbs up,
• 28:26
  Speaker 11: just you know, making sure that they see I see them,
• 28:29
  Speaker 11: I think is important, just because I think that we're
• 28:32
  Speaker 11: all feeling a little bit more lonely, and a lot
• 28:34
  Speaker 11: of people are truly alone day to day, and so
• 28:37
  Speaker 11: to have that kind of interaction, I've known from early
• 28:40
  Speaker 11: in my career how important the the interaction with that
• 28:45
  Speaker 11: letter carrier can be for some people. One customer of mine,
• 28:49
  Speaker 11: she's passed away now a few years back. I got
• 28:53
  Speaker 11: to know her initially because the complex that she lived in,
• 28:57
  Speaker 11: the mailboxes were kind of a big bank of boxes,
• 28:59
  Speaker 11: you know when you live in an apartment, and her
• 29:02
  Speaker 11: mailbox was on the upper row, and she had limited
• 29:06
  Speaker 11: mobility to open her mailbox. So the setup was is
• 29:09
  Speaker 11: that you just took her mail out, and you rang
• 29:11
  Speaker 11: her doorbell and she would come down and get the
• 29:13
  Speaker 11: mail from you, so she wouldn't have to reach up
• 29:15
  Speaker 11: and try and get it out of that mailbox. And
• 29:18
  Speaker 11: my initial thought was like, well, well, we should just
• 29:20
  Speaker 11: move your mailbox. But at first I just followed the
• 29:23
  Speaker 11: rule and I would buzz her apartment building and she
• 29:25
  Speaker 11: would come down to get her mail and we'd have
• 29:28
  Speaker 11: a nice chat while she waited for me to finish
• 29:30
  Speaker 11: up with the filling everybody's mailbox. And so we just
• 29:34
  Speaker 11: got to know each other more and more over, you know,
• 29:36
  Speaker 11: probably a good five or six years, I never moved
• 29:39
  Speaker 11: her box, you know, the more that I got to
• 29:41
  Speaker 11: know her better and the opportunity to interact with her
• 29:45
  Speaker 11: on a daily basis, I reached a point where it
• 29:47
  Speaker 11: just didn't seem necessary to try and change anything. To
• 29:55
  Speaker 11: get to know a customer day after day is just
• 30:00
  Speaker 11: a bonus of the job. It's something that we don't
• 30:03
  Speaker 11: think about as being what the job definition is, but
• 30:06
  Speaker 11: to me is what makes the job more than just
• 30:09
  Speaker 11: something that you get out of bed and you do
• 30:11
  Speaker 11: every day. When there's somebody that you know is looking
• 30:14
  Speaker 11: forward to seeing you, and at the same time, I
• 30:17
  Speaker 11: realized I'm looking forward to seeing them as well.
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: That's it.
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: That was our final episode of twenty twenty. Thank you
• 30:40
  Speaker 4: everyone for listening. And we hope you have a safe
• 30:43
  Speaker 4: holiday season. We're looking for stories for our next season,
• 30:46
  Speaker 4: so if there's a moment from your past that you
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: still wonder about, that feels unresolved, or that you need
• 30:51
  Speaker 4: some help with, please do email us at Heavyweight at
• 30:54
  Speaker 4: gimbletmedia dot com