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Transcript

Life With My Arab Wife · Obnoxiously Pleasant

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_04: I'm Hanan.
• 0:00
  SPEAKER_04: I'm Melina.
• 0:01
  SPEAKER_03: I'm Philip.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_04: And I'm Jilan.
• 0:03
  SPEAKER_04: And today we're gonna talk to you guys about intercultural marriages.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_04: So just for background, um, Gilen is my sister, Philip is my brother-in-law, and by now you guys know we're Egyptian, and Philip is I'm Dutch.
• 0:14
  SPEAKER_04: Like for real Dutch.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_05: Not like, you know, his great grandparents' country in Pennsylvania, but like from the actual Dutch people land of the Netherlands.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_05: From the Netherlands, yeah, from the Netherlands.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_05: Um, so why don't you guys tell us how you met?
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 0:27
  SPEAKER_05: So I met Philip.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_05: Uh he was working with Hanan at uh in the Dark Ages in 2006.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_05: Maybe 2005.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_05: No, 2006.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_01: No, 2006.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: 2006.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it's been so long, Philip.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_05: I don't know.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, can't keep track of time.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_05: Uh so I visited Henan at work, and I sat at Philip's desk, which was really, really messy.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_05: And I wrote you a note.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_04: And Philip and I literally used to sit like this, like side by side.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_04: Side by side.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, like Lena, where Lena sits, used to be just like that space, like you know, where our computers and stuff sat in the middle.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_05: So uh I wrote you a note to tell you how messy your desk was, included my coffee order in there, and told you that you could bring it by my office.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_05: And so he did.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_05: We had not yet met, but I did see a picture of you on MySpace.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_05: Wow, MySpace.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_05: My space.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_05: Wow.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_05: My space.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_05: It was my space.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_05: My space.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_05: So okay.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_05: So the days, how long you were not in my top eight, though.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_05: And you were not in Hanan's either.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_05: Top eight.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_06: I do.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_06: I forgot.
• 1:22
  SPEAKER_06: But I remember that.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, remember that top eight?
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_03: I do remember um Hanan at some point said, you know, maybe if you're nice, I'll introduce you to my sister.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_06: You said that?
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_03: A while later she said, I'll introduce you to my sister.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_06: See?
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_06: I think she was trying to get rid of me.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_06: That is not true.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_06: That is a big possibility, actually.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_06: Maybe.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_06: Um, so how long uh before you guys got married?
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_05: Uh about a year before we got engaged, and then uh six months after that we were married.
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_05: And it was the happiest day of Phillips' life.
• 1:54
  unknown: Okay.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_06: Not hers, just Phillips.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_06: Just Phillips.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_06: Before that, though.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_06: For me, yeah.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_06: Terrible.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_06: Before that, what what did you like most about him though?
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_06: Like what's the one I feel like you're putting me really on the spot with an awkward question.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_00: How is that awkward?
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_06: You married the guy.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_06: I have to think back.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't prepare for the colour.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, well we'll go we'll take it to Philip.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_06: Philip, what did you what was the first thing that really got your attention?
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_06: He has eyes, obviously.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, seriously.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_04: So this is this is we're gonna get there.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_04: As you can see, like poor Philip is stuck between you know our loud ass Egyptian family.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_06: And this is mostly what it's like.
• 2:36
  unknown: Okay.
• 2:37
  SPEAKER_04: I'm pretty used to the body.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_06: Let him answer the question.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_06: What did you like about this lady right now?
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I think honestly, like her her eyes definitely struck me first.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_05: It's not my personality, it's on the inside of it.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_03: Well, they're they're the window to the soul, so that is very nice.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_03: Um I think the letter was definitely a good uh like indication of her sense of humor.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_03: And yeah, I think that was just the beginning of the show.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_06: She definitely has an amazing sense of humor.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_06: Thank you very much.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_06: Very funny.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_06: I I will I will and the award goes to me then?
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_06: Yes.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_06: The award goes to you.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_06: Yes.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_06: Um, so how soon did you guys uh realize yeah, this is actually going somewhere?
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_06: And when did you start talking about telling your family?
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_05: So the funny thing is, we didn't actually really tell our families.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_05: My dad showed up one day and uh he goes, I have a really important question for you.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_05: And I said, What is it?
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_05: And he had met Philip uh as Hanaan's friend, and he said, Hanan, uh Hanan's friend Philip, do you want me to hook you up with him?
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_05: And I was like, No, no, I'm I'm okay.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_05: Thank you so much.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_05: My dad, my dad's pretty great, guys.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, okay.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_05: He's awesome.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_05: So he tried to hook us up, and at that point, uh, that was the moment that I realized that my parents liked Philip more than they liked me.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_05: Yep.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_05: True story.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_04: One hundred facts, facts, facts, like him.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_06: My parents like Philip better than all of us.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_06: He's like here, and then the rest of the family is.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_06: Here's the question that people are gonna, when they're listening or watching this, they're gonna be like, well, you're Muslim and your dad is trying to set you up with this Dutch guy, right?
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_06: So the Dutch guy was already Muslim.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_06: Ah, so that's like key.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_06: So do you want to explain how you became not became like how did that process?
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_06: Like that was before you met Gilan or after or during?
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_03: It was before.
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_05: Before it was Hassan in college.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:30
  SPEAKER_03: So he I I was he was uh he's Pakistani and my roommate for two two years.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um so I kind of knew like he was definitely very like practicing Muslims.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_03: He was a very good Muslim.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_03: Still is.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_06: As far as I know.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_06: Right.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, we don't know how they can apparently.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_06: We may not be a good Muslim anymore or whatever that means.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_06: Man, you're you alay Enoch.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_06: Like God help you with no.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_03: I have amazing patience.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, and I really do, sir.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_03: Practice it every day.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_06: Yes, we really do.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, no, with everybody, with the entire family.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_06: Don't let them cut you out like, let's let him talk.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, so I was familiar with.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_03: There you go.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_03: I have to practice that sometimes too.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_04: I'm gonna kill you.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_04: Go ahead, Philip.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_04: You guys let Philip answer that question.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_04: I'm trying.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_03: I had been exposed to I guess Islam a little bit through through Hassan.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_03: And um then working with a lot of Arabs and like closely with Hanan.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_01: Um I don't remember most Arabs.
• 5:37
  SPEAKER_01: It was it was the work was there were mostly Arabs.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they were mostly Arabs.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_04: There's just like people from like all different and I just say it it was just like different kind of Middle Eastern folks and also North Africans, so it was a very varied um group of people.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_04: Like that, yeah.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_03: Not all of them Muslim either.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so I don't I don't remember how soon or exactly how that came about, but I think through you, your mom got me a copy of the Quran.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_03: And then I kind of read that and it kind of made sense.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_03: I talked to Hassan a little bit, and then eventually um he took me to the um what's the the the Islamic Center in DC.
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, the one like across from all the end of the year.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_05: I feel I can't hear all of your memories straight in my head.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_03: This is why I married you, so you can keep track of all of my memories.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, so basically religion wasn't an issue.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_03: No, it wasn't.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, and then you made that decision on your own and you're fully committed to that way of life.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_05: I need you to say that with a little bit more like oomph.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_05: Because viewers will think that I forced you into something that I didn't.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_03: No, we just had like a five-minute conversation behind you.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_04: All right, so you I don't and I'll tell you why we asked this stuff because most of the folks, a lot of the folks who follow us always ask about, you know, like how did you guys meet your husbands, or if you're in an intercultural or even like inter-religious or interracial, whatever, you know, relationship, how do you take it to the next step?
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_04: And I know there's so many different um levels of problems that you can face when you are dealing with like a Middle Eastern family, right?
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_04: Or even on the other side.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_04: So the reason that I think this is so great is because sometimes it's not as hard as you think it actually is.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_06: So your dad wanted to hook you up with he did.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_05: He thought Philip was so wonderful.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_05: My dad was trying to hook Janet up with everybody.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_05: No, he wasn't stuck.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_05: Like the latest in the road.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_05: That was you.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_05: I think we need to get dad on this podcast.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_05: Because I'm still the favorite.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_05: I got, I got, I got married on my own.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_05: Thank you.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_05: And I got married by like arranged marriage.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_06: So let's get this, let's make this, let's get it clear here for everybody.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_06: So the nan is taking credit for your marriage, basically.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_06: Absolutely.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_06: That's not how credit works.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_06: So how why do you think your dad came up to you and said, Hey, do you want me to like introduce?
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_05: So it was Ramadan, and Philip came to our house.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_05: Uh Hanan was already married and uh out of the house.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_05: My brother was still home.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_05: I was still home.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_05: So uh Philip came to our house during Ramadan for iftar one time.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_05: And my parents were like, Oh, this guy is so nice, he's so muhtaram.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_05: And in the back of my mind, I'm thinking they don't know him very well.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_04: No, no, no.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_04: No, it no, it's fine.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_04: I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_05: Uh, and we had a great time.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_05: And um, my my dad just really liked Philip, clicked with him, and he still does.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_05: He yeah, he's I guess.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_05: Everybody, everybody likes Philip, yeah.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, that's a consensus.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_05: Well, not everybody, but most people.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_05: Most people, yeah.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, most people.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_04: Everybody.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, so your parents were had no issue.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_05: No, not at all.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, that's my dad's pretty open.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_05: And uh as long as they're a nice person, kind, uh then it's okay.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_06: And like, did you like obviously your parents and immediate family they were supportive, but did you get any kind of backlash as you know, because Philip's not Arab, you know, from extended family, maybe?
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_06: Like, not necessarily backlash, but definitely commentary.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_05: Commentary weird questions.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, the the questions and the comments and the will he change his name?
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_05: Uh definitely things that were eyebrow raising, we'll call it.
• 9:16
  SPEAKER_05: I think that the wonderful thing about that is my dad really shielded a lot of those comments.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_05: And he responded uh to all of the comments before either one of us had an opportunity to respond, which was so nice.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, because then you know you have his support, you have his backing.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_05: And honestly, whether it's friends or extended family, that's it.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_05: To me, that's that's it.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_05: As long as you've got your parents backing and support, that's what you need.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_04: And I know that's not you usual, like this is not the story that you hear.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_04: And so the reason we wanted to share this is to one, normalize it, like this exists.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_04: You could actually you could do this, like you could talk to your family, and it may be a lot easier than you actually think.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_05: Um dad was not exactly the most open individual.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_05: No, he was very strict parents growing up.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_05: No, no, but what I mean is like and if if you can surprise you.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, your parents can surprise you 100%.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_04: So it's like if you're out there and you're thinking, oh my gosh, like, you know, how do I talk to my family about this, or is this something that I'm gonna be able to do?
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_04: Um, no, you could do it.
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_04: It's it's totally doable, and your parents will most likely surprise you.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_06: So um, let me see my question here.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_06: I had a I have a list of questions for you guys.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_06: Um, so what do you and and obviously you don't have to deal with this with your family, thank God.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_06: Um but what about you, Philip?
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_06: Did you did your family have any comments or like how did they feel about this?
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_03: About what, about the marriage part?
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_06: Or like the Yeah, just you being well, okay, being Muslim.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_04: Let's say, yeah, let's take it in steps.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_04: Let's talk about being Muslim and then like the the the marriage part.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_04: So like in those steps or in that order.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_03: So my my whole life we've been very like a religious.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I think mostly due to the fact that my parents both grew up pretty strictly Catholic.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_03: Um and therefore kind of rejected it.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_03: My my mom, especially, is very, let's say, anti um organized religion.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so it was definitely, I think, a an adjustment for them, but I think as soon as they realized that it didn't change me, that I wasn't any different, um they were they were completely fine and they were basically like, you know, do whatever makes you happy.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_03: So that was really uh really nice.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_06: And then in terms of uh Jillan, did they love Jillan right off the bat or Lenin?
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_03: They did, and I kind of feel like the same that that Jalen says about her parents liking me better than her, I think it kind of works the same way for my my parents as well.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_03: Um I think they know that Jalen can always be counted on.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_03: She's much more reliable than I am.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_03: So I think if things need to happen, if things need to be done, like she's the one to go to.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_03: She um is definitely the the the person who will take the action that needs to be taken right away.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_05: You could ask Philip if you need anything to to get done.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_05: And in three to six months when he lets me know, I'll definitely do it right away.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_06: So messed up by the haram aliki.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_06: Um okay, so what do you guys like what's your response?
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_06: Like, obviously, Alhamdulillah, like you guys had no issue uh with both of your families, but how do you respond to people that say no?
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_06: You know, just stick with your own culture, it's easier, it's too much of a headache.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_06: Like, what do you guys what's your response to that?
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_06: My response is why?
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_05: What makes it easier?
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_05: Why, why are you following the path that you're you think you're expected to follow?
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_05: And why do you think you're expected to follow that path?
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_05: We're all people at the end of the day, we're all human at the end of the day.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_05: The the color of your skin, your background, all of that stuff honestly is irrelevant.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_05: What makes you think that you have the we'll call it the perfect match with somebody that grew up the same as you versus someone else?
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_05: Uh, I think the the reason we work is because we're fire and ice.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_05: I'm very much the fire and Philip is very much the ice.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_05: I've tried to melt him over the years, it has not worked, and it hasn't worked.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_05: He just keeps like freezing back up.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_05: But I think it's important for your own happiness to determine what is it that makes you happy.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_05: And the answer to that should not just be because my parents told me or because that's what I'm absolutely going to do.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_04: So now, like for everybody out there that's like listening or watching and is like in a similar situation, right?
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_04: Because like we have um our followers are great.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_04: It's like they're all across the spectrum.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_04: So we have people who are older, people who are younger.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_04: If you have somebody that's in that situation and they are, say if you come from like a very traditional family, and like ours is kind of on some respects.
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_04: We're we're pretty, we're very traditional family.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_04: In some respects.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, there are others where we're not like as you know traditional as other families.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_06: I I I've known you two for a while.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_04: Your parents they're pretty cool, they're cool, but they were also strictly.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, but we don't remember the one time we got home at 11.03 at an 11 o'clock curfew.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_05: We definitely have a couple of years.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_04: We almost didn't survive.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, we definitely have a curfew.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_04: But basically, if somebody is in this situation and say they come from like a very strict family, or I I'm not gonna use the word religious, I'm gonna use the word conservative because most, in my opinion, the people who were raised with us were conservative, more conservative than anything else.
• 14:08
  SPEAKER_04: What's the advice for somebody who's in that situation and wants to talk to their family and then wants to kind of bridge that gap between the different cultures and they're worried?
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_04: Like, how do they begin to do that?
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_04: Or how do they begin that conversation?
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_04: Do you want to take it or do you want me to take it?
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_03: You can start.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_03: I think.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, go ahead.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_05: So you want me just to answer for both of them?
• 14:25
  unknown: Yeah, awesome.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_05: This is all the time.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_05: I want to give him a platform, but he doesn't want it.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_05: Uh, it's really important to first and foremost know what you want.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 14:34
  SPEAKER_05: Second, walk into a conversation feeling pretty confident about your decision and the reason why you made that decision.
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_05: It's important to not second guess yourself and walk in saying, I think this is what I want to do.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_05: Maybe this is the path I want to take.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_05: If this is really what you want to do, understand one, why do you want to do it?
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_05: And two, if it's that important to you, go and pursue that.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_05: Have the conversation.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_05: I'm a big believer of if you don't ask, you don't get.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_05: And what's the worst that could happen?
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_05: You could be right before you started.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_05: Exactly.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_05: Um, as Hanan said, your family will surprise you.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_05: Ultimately, our parents want us to be really happy.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_05: And I think that's very true for the majority of people.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_05: Your parents want the best for you.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_05: They may not uh see that what you think is the best is necessarily the best, but it's up to you to stand your ground and explain to them why this is the best decision for you.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_05: What worked for them isn't necessarily gonna work for you.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_05: And and times are changing, the world is different.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_05: 100% living in an environment or a community where we are all from the same space.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_03: And Philip.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I I I agree with that, but the only thing I wanted to add to that is make it, as you always say, a conversation, not a confrontation.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_03: Like go into it.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_05: Don't steal my lines.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_05: I think it's in the original.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_00: My God is quoting he's trying to be nice.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_06: Masquine.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_06: I know.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_03: So anyway, as she said, she's trying to give me a platform.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_03: And now I'm taking it.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so don't go into it like as an ultimatum.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_03: Like don't make it a confrontation and say like, or else.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_03: Because then you're just gonna walk into that wall and then the wall's gonna just, you know, stand its ground and put its own wall up.
• 16:10
  unknown: Okay.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_04: I I I totally agree.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_04: Because yeah, I think it's um, I think it's really hard.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_04: And I think a lot of people are always afraid of like, well, what you know, how am I gonna be?
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_04: How is and once you get past that hurdle, it's like, okay, was this person gonna fit into my family?
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_04: Are they gonna understand, like, you know, the jokes we're making?
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_04: Are they gonna understand the conversation?
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_04: And I think it's really up to you to figure out like to kind of look and include that person.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_04: You have to kind of like find your find your like kind of make the vibe, right?
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_04: Like kind of find where what it is exactly that you want to do and how you want to fit into the family, right?
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and and that's I think it's uh it's a excuse me.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_03: It's a two-way thing.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_03: So on the one hand, like what I I really like a Jeanne always does is she makes sure that I was always included in the conversation.
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_03: Like when I let let's say just started out.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and I didn't understand.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_03: Like the the the language as much, and now just from I really enjoy learning languages, so Philip is unique, guys.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_04: Do you before you continue?
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_04: No, but honestly, Philip is very unique, he is not like everybody else.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_04: Philip like understands and learns languages like very easily, like way more, like he that he literally has it in the ear for languages.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_04: So I know this may not be everybody's experience, so it's definitely not mine, uh, but he understands a lot of what we say and a lot of what's happening, and not just in Arabic.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_04: What are the languages you speak, Philip?
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I took Korean for three years in college.
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_03: I have learned Spanish, German, French, Latin, and Greek.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_03: And you also speak Dutch, friend.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_04: I well, that's my and and he used to he used to be able to do some, you know, Afrikaan work for us because Afrika is very close to Dutch, too.
• 17:45
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_03: So what I was uh saying is that what I really enjoy is that Jeanne always made sure that I was included in that conversation.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_03: So if there were stories and jokes, she would either say, um, I'll translate it for you in a second, or she would translate like the joke, or this is what what they're saying.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_03: And that was, you know, it was really helpful, yeah, for sure.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_03: And as Jeanette was gonna say, the first thing that one of the first kind of expressions that she taught me that is kind of relevant is uh Atrash Fzepha.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_06: Zeyl Atrashfze.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_05: Because whenever he hung out with our family, he was Zayl Atrash Vzepha.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_05: Do you want to tell us over?
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_05: It is a very when I hung out with his family, I then became the Atrash Vzeph.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_04: So it's used very commonly in Egypt.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_04: I think you guys see it too, right?
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_04: So I like, and then the Levant.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_04: And then essentially it refers to when you don't understand something that's going on, it's like you're a deaf person in a wedding procession.
• 18:43
  SPEAKER_04: So you know what's happening.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_04: There's a lot, what's, you know, there's a lot happening around you.
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, but you're not getting it.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_06: Philip.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_06: Uh, what are some of the things that you had to get used to being married to an Arab?
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_06: Organization.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_02: The noise level.
• 19:02
  unknown: Yeah.
• 19:03
  unknown: Yeah.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, the noise level.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_06: What's one thing you still don't get?
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_06: The noise level.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_03: No, I well, I don't know if it's that I don't get it.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_03: I have definitely gotten used to it, but you also know that I'm pretty good at kind of maybe not tuning things out is probably too too much of a lot of things.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_03: No, tuning things out.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_04: No, Philip Philip can't.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_04: We can have a whole ass argument.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_04: And he's like, What happened?
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_05: Hold on, I could be deceased in the corner.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_05: What happened?
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_05: And he's like, Where's your mother?
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_05: Tuning things out mentally, like visually, you don't hear anything.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I can focus let's say I can focus on something.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_04: We can definitely never utilize Philip as like a witness in a crime scene.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_04: Never.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_04: Like, no, he's just gonna.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, literally, we can get murdered, and Philip's gonna be like, Oh, I thought they were.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not quiet or whatever.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_06: I'm not really I thought they were whispering.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, but that's more of a personality than a cultural thing.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_04: The little voices.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, yeah.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_06: Um, so what's one thing, and maybe this is kind of similar to the first question, but what's one thing you still struggle with in terms of in regards to being married to an Arab family?
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_06: Something that really annoys you.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_06: It's okay, she's not gonna hurt you.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_06: We're here.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_06: The camera will stop rolling at some point.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I I I honestly don't know if there's anything.
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_03: Like I'm putting you on the spot.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I like I I don't I don't think there's anything.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, we'll talk about it when the camera's done.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_03: No, I don't think there's anything I can really think of that that I either am not used to or I'm still struggling with.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_04: Not the guys, like I feel like struggling with bemya.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_04: You're struggling with me.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_04: But I doesn't even like bemya.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_04: All I was gonna say is Phillips like literally found his cozy spot.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_04: He eats mumbar, so I feel like that's really good.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_06: What's the bamia situation?
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_05: Bemya.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_05: He doesn't even know they both don't eat bemia.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we both don't eat bemya.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_05: The one thing you can't get accustomed to is some of the food.
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_05: Bemya and kibda.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_05: You don't even like kibda.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_05: What are you talking about?
• 20:51
  SPEAKER_05: That's why I married a Dutch person.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_05: But it's like she's getting me out of here.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_04: He can't get accustomed to the food, but she doesn't eat those things.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_04: But if I'm forced, I will eat it.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_04: That's why we're really upset about it.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_04: No, you're not gonna eat bemya.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_03: We both avoid bemia together.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_03: Maybe.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, exactly.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_04: I love bemya.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_04: Me and Lena love bemmya.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_06: I don't know about love.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_06: I mean, if it's there and it's in the corner of the couch, loves bemia.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_05: Just don't eat it on the couch.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, definitely not on Janet's house.
• 21:15
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god, speaking of the couch, you guys, we're in the guest room.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_04: Janet's filming the room.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_04: You know the space like in every Middle Eastern house where like you can't wear your shoes, that's where we're filming today.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_04: I I am that Middle Eastern person.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_05: I'm so sorry.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_05: Yes, this is the rule.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_05: I do have a hard rule of no jeans in the white chair, but today I bought the chair.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_05: I sat in the chair.
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_05: I'm trying not to move in the chair to not let the you go rub in the chair.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_06: We appreciate, we appreciate that she let us use the room and the chair.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_06: All right, so we're gonna do some fun questions.
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_06: Yes.
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_06: Uh and for the viewers, there are no prizes.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_06: I checked.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_04: No, no.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_06: I mean, you get to be on our podcast, so you mean you get to have me on your podcast.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_06: Anyway.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_06: Anyway, Julianne, describe what you first thought of Philip in one word.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_06: Quiet.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_06: Philip.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_01: Loud.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_06: I can hear it.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_06: Alright.
• 22:13
  SPEAKER_06: Philip, what's your pet name that Gillian has given you?
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_06: Like a pet name Julianne has given you.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_04: No, no, I'll tell you guys.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_04: What Gillian always tells Philip is before Philip is this is why nobody likes the owner.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_05: No, I don't say that to him.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_05: I literally look at him and I just go, Philip.
• 22:28
  unknown: Yeah.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_03: Two things.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_05: Two things.
• 22:30
  SPEAKER_05: One, uh, why are you like this?
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_05: And two, this is why I know exactly why nobody likes you.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_05: For background, Philip has severe allergies.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_05: He is allergic to love, fun, and happiness.
• 22:41
  SPEAKER_05: He's not been working on it for the last 15 years.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, is that asking my pet name?
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_04: That is the pet name.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_06: This is why nobody likes you.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_04: Are you serious?
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_06: That's your freaking pet name to him?
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_06: I'm like confused here.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_06: Well, that's that's honestly most of the time I call you furrib.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_06: Furrib, yeah.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_06: Furrib.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_06: And what do you call her?
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_03: Babe.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_03: Babe?
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_03: That's it.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, moftadum.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_06: Really?
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_06: Alright, okay.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_06: Uh who apologizes first after a fight?
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_02: Me.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah?
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_05: Is that usually the case?
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_05: About 97% of the time I'm right.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_05: The other there's then there's 2% where I'm out I'm out of the country, and then 1% where I'm wrong, but I'm still not gonna apologize.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_05: And you're okay with that?
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_06: Philip is like he's like, yeah, see me.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, yeah.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_06: Go ahead.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_06: I'm sorry.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_03: No, I found my niche in that, I suppose.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_03: And yeah.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_05: Philip it's uh it's a tough area to be in because if he doesn't argue back with me, then I have a real issue.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_05: But the moment he surprises me and argues back, I have an even bigger issue.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, see, see, I mean he cannot win.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_05: It's like you're damned if you do, damned if you're like the good news is I tell him this in advance, so it's not like I surprise.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_04: It's not a surprise.
• 24:00
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 24:00
  SPEAKER_04: Basically, what Philip where Philip has landed is like somewhere like no man's land where you're just like, you know what?
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_03: It's fine, it's gonna be okay, I'll apologize, and the world will just keep moving forward.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, unfortunately, I love this woman and unfortunately.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, you're in trouble now.
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, okay.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_00: Unfortunately at some point this camera will be.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_04: You know, before we get to your next question, can we talk about how here is here is another area where Philip is um like our Middle Eastern traditions have like kind of I don't know how to stayed is like he's wearing a dad shipship in the house.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_03: This has been patient consequence of the COVID pandemic.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, he's being home so much and my feet starting to hurt from walking on the hard floor all the time.
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, so he is now officially wearing like a dad ship ship in the house.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_04: I turned 40.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_03: Like what we're gonna do.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, exactly.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_06: Exactly.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, back to the questions.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_06: Who is the better cook?
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_06: I think we definitely share in that responsibility.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_06: There's Philip.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_06: I've had I've had an I've had Phillips for Philip.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_04: Philip actually makes us some really good subjects a pretty good cook, too.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_05: So we we we definitely share.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_05: I've been on strike for a little while.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_01: A little while.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_05: I know, it's been like four years.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I do everything else.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, everything else.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_05: Everything else.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_05: I I bring all of the the joy, the love, and the happiness that you take away from this home.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_05: I bring it in.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_05: God, guys are joking.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_06: I know.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_04: She's really nice to him.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_04: I know, she's really nice to him.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_04: You know the beauty, you're gonna get so much hate on TikTok.
• 25:27
  unknown: I know.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_04: You're gonna get so much hate on TikTok.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_06: All right, so the good news is Lena's gonna edit all of that out.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_06: I'm not editing anything.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_04: No, we're leaving it.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_06: Um, who is grumpier in the morning?
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_04: Gilene.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_04: Gilene.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_04: She's gonna be a big one.
• 25:38
  SPEAKER_04: Exactly.
• 25:38
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, three cups of coffee before she talks to any people.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, the first one is to wake up, the second one is to be like semi-coherent and like be able to tolerate family.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_03: And then the third one is to be able to tolerate colleagues.
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_05: Like the rest of the world.
• 25:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yes, the rest of the world, yeah.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_05: If forced, I'll go on too.
• 25:56
  SPEAKER_03: If forced, yeah.
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 25:58
  unknown: Yeah.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_03: But you're not happy about it.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_05: Oh, I'm definitely not happy about it, and I want to make sure everybody knows it.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_05: Philip.
• 26:03
  SPEAKER_06: It's okay, don't worry.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_06: I'll take I'll I'll I'll handle this if she gets mad.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_06: But what's one thing she does around the house that drives you insane?
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_03: That drives me insane?
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_05: I'd love to know.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_06: She's here looking.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_06: I'd love to know.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_06: But I'm scared for you.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um I um I would probably say uh, well, she usually fails to refill the water picture.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_00: The water picture.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I love that.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: Fails to refill.
• 26:36
  SPEAKER_03: Or, you know, I like I was just about to type it on.
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_04: I'm just gonna do that.
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_04: I was just about to do that.
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_04: I love how Billy goes fails to refill.
• 26:44
  SPEAKER_04: He makes it seem like it's something that it's just the picture, the the Brita filters.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_05: Which is like very important.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_05: But I do fill it all the time now that you've called me out.
• 26:52
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, Gillen.
• 26:53
  SPEAKER_06: That was it works.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_06: Yes.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_06: Same for you, same question.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_06: What's one thing he does that drives you absolutely mad?
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_06: He doesn't wipe the counters, he will always leave crumbs.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_05: Mmm, that's kind of annoying.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_05: You always to his credit, Philip is our dishwasher.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_05: Philip does a great job at washing the dishes, but I can't say anything to him, and I never do.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_05: Uh-huh.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_05: Because you wash the dishes all the time, but then whenever you're done cleaning all the dishes and put them in the dishwasher, and I walk by and there's crumbs on the counter, I immediately like it.
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_04: But I feel like at the same time, like if you're washing the dishes, somebody else should just clean the freaking counter.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_05: And then I feel like you should just stay on that side of the end.
• 27:28
  SPEAKER_04: No, I mean, and like, okay, seriously, we need to vote on this because this is like a point of contention for me in my life, okay?
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_04: Okay if you are cleaning and doing the dishes and in this when he does his dishes, did he also make dinner?
• 27:41
  unknown: Yeah.
• 27:41
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, like yeah, you can wipe the crumbs.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_06: No, yeah, that's why I don't say anything.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, listen, I was you.
• 27:48
  SPEAKER_05: I didn't say that I don't disagree.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_05: I'm I'm agreeing with you.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_05: I think it's about it.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, the question is what drives me insane, and that's it.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, okay.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_05: I'm not disagreeing with you, which is why I don't seem to be.
• 27:59
  SPEAKER_05: And I walk by and I'm like, doot doot doot, yeah, yeah.
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, now now I get it.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_05: Because I still respect myself.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_05: The man just worked hard.
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 28:06
  SPEAKER_04: If you guys hear dog barking, that's Olivia.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, she's so cute.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_06: She loves the dog.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_06: Um we love her to death.
• 28:11
  SPEAKER_05: Uh, who is the bigger baby when sick?
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_03: Jalen.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_05: Me, for sure.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_03: 100%.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_03: 100%.
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_05: Absolutely.
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_05: I'll take a knife to the stomach, but you give me a cold literally.
• 28:21
  SPEAKER_05: I'm out of here.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's so funny because you are definitely like you have much higher pain tolerance.
• 28:26
  SPEAKER_03: You're you're okay with anything in that regard.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm much more the baby in that.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_03: But then as soon as like sickness rolls around, I'm just like powering through it as I can.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_04: Julianne gets a cold and she's like today, Drake.
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_05: Today was bad.
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_05: Today was terrible.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_05: I think I died 14 times before 8 a.m.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_05: and I only woke up at 7:30, and I can't handle a cold.
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_06: All right.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_06: Interesting.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_06: All right, last question.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_06: Who is more likely to get arrested?
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_06: Gilen sent me.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_05: One million.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_05: We can all agree.
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, Gilen.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_01: That's not even a yeah.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_05: Well, it depends.
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_05: I would like to think that if the kids are involved, like if somebody messes with the kids, we'd both get arrested.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, obviously.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_05: But then we don't want to like orphan our children.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_05: But there's a plan.
• 29:06
  SPEAKER_05: Hanan will take the kids.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_04: Absolutely.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_04: And I'm just gonna let you guys know if Jilen gets arrested, I am most likely gonna be the one bailing her out because Philip's gonna forget.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_04: Like one of the things.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_05: Oh, I'm gonna be like, Philip, you need to come get me.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna be with the kids.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_05: Like that one time you forgot to pick up the kids.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_03: I have never forgotten.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_03: What was this?
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_05: I was in Bulgaria and he forgot to pick up the kids.
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_05: I'm sorry, no, I was in Nottingham, UK.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_05: I don't remember.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_05: I don't remember this either.
• 29:33
  SPEAKER_05: That's because you choose to block these things out of your mind.
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_05: Alright, yeah.
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_05: You ready for the game?
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_05: That wasn't the game?
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_06: No, I thought that was the game.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_03: No, that's just questions.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_06: Alright, let's go game.
• 29:46
  SPEAKER_06: So we're gonna put you guys on the spot.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_06: Let's go.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_06: See how well they know each other.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_06: How long have you been married?
• 29:52
  unknown: Fifteen years.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_06: Fifteen years?
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_06: It's like the games you play at bridal showers.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_06: Alright.
• 29:56
  SPEAKER_06: First question for you, Philip.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_06: Which high school did Gilan go to?
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_03: Thomas Addison.
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 30:02
  SPEAKER_06: Is that correct?
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_06: That is correct.
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, Gilan.
• 30:05
  SPEAKER_06: Who was Philip's best friend uh in childhood, like growing up?
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_05: I can't say the gentleman's name.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_00: Why?
• 30:14
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know it.
• 30:15
  SPEAKER_00: What do you mean?
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_00: You don't know wait, wait, wait.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_05: You don't know how to pronounce it or you don't know how to I can, however, go get you a picture from the um photos that I just organized.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, no, no.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_06: Stop, stop.
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_06: So she has zero and Philip has one.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_06: Yes, absolutely.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_05: That's an unfair question.
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_06: No, no, it's not.
• 30:33
  SPEAKER_06: Ask him about my childhood.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_06: He will know nothing.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_06: That's not true.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_06: Keep it real.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_06: Philip, here's a tough one.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_06: Can you name two of Jananne's grandparents' names?
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_06: Not four, two.
• 30:42
  SPEAKER_03: Grandparents' names?
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_03: I cannot.
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_06: That's really hard because they were both like dead by the time they were.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, that's a very difficult question.
• 30:51
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I've never met her grandparents or okay, so we'll we'll take that one out.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_06: You won't count it, okay?
• 30:56
  SPEAKER_06: I can't name his own.
• 30:57
  SPEAKER_06: Philip is one, you're zero.
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 31:00
  SPEAKER_06: Philip.
• 31:00
  unknown: Yes.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_06: Who is Gillan's celebrity crush?
• 31:04
  unknown: Oh my god.
• 31:05
  SPEAKER_01: Harry Styles, right?
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_05: Really?
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_05: 100%.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_05: I feel like if you don't know this as a commoner walking god that you're doing, yeah, I heard that is that you don't deserve to be alive.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_03: Harry Styles probably knows that.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, and just for the record, you know, I will leave you and the children for Harry Styles.
• 31:20
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, thankfully he lives in a different continent.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_05: If he just looks in my direction and I feel like there's hope.
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_06: Damn.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_06: I know.
• 31:26
  SPEAKER_06: I was like, oh my god.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_06: We still want you guys to be together after.
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, all right.
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_06: Gillen.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_06: Yes.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_05: Uh what's Philip's favorite video game to play?
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_05: Philip doesn't play video games anymore.
• 31:37
  SPEAKER_05: He plays with his cars.
• 31:39
  SPEAKER_05: But he did use to play.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, yeah, because I remember Philip used to play video games.
• 31:43
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, you used to play uh GTA and um that gun one.
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_06: The gun one.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_04: They're like all gun wars.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_03: Call of Duty.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_04: Call of Duty.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_04: Call of Duty.
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so basically now Philip is at two and Jillan is at one.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, okay.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_06: How do you eat two?
• 31:57
  SPEAKER_03: Harry Styles.
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_06: Harry Styles.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_06: Philip, what's Jillan's shoe size?
• 32:03
  SPEAKER_03: Uh depending on the brand, six or six and a half.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, that's right.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_06: Uh what's this for you, uh Gilan?
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_06: What's Philip's favorite sports team in America?
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_06: The Green Bay Packers.
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, good job.
• 32:18
  SPEAKER_06: That's awesome.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_06: All right.
• 32:20
  SPEAKER_06: So three and two.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_06: Three and two.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_01: Still ahead.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_06: Uh Gillan, I'm gonna ask you this.
• 32:25
  SPEAKER_06: What's uh Philip's favorite ice cream flavor?
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_05: Philip doesn't eat ice cream, but if he isn't gonna eat ice cream, he's gonna eat Hagenda's ice cream because that's what I buy.
• 32:32
  SPEAKER_06: Are we giving her that one?
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_06: Damn, girl.
• 32:37
  unknown: All right.
• 32:38
  SPEAKER_01: Whatever I'm giving.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_06: Exactly.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_06: So it's even now it's three and three.
• 32:44
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, Philip.
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_06: Uh what's the last TV show that Gillan binge watched?
• 32:49
  SPEAKER_03: She's still binge watching it.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know if it has like 18,000 seasons.
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_03: Which one?
• 32:52
  SPEAKER_03: But it's Love Island UK.
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_06: Oh my god.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, so that's four to three.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_06: That's four to three.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_06: All right.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_06: Uh Gillane.
• 33:00
  SPEAKER_06: What's Philip's favorite food?
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_06: Or one of the top three favorite foods?
• 33:04
  SPEAKER_06: And we'll see if he can confirm.
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_06: It's very hard because Philip likes so.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_05: So, yeah, it's very difficult.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_05: That's why I said like top.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_05: Because he eats a lot of different food.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_05: He's much more open with food than I am.
• 33:16
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, isn't it funny?
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_04: That like breaks the stereotype, guys.
• 33:19
  SPEAKER_05: And and plus, he has a much larger selection.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_05: He's had he has Dutch food, he has Egyptian food.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_05: So do you.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_07: You just don't like any food.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_05: She's stalling.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_05: She's stalling.
• 33:30
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I'm trying to do that.
• 33:31
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_05: It's pasta.
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_05: It's gonna be carbonara or it's gonna be nasi.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_03: Nasi.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_03: That's a good one.
• 33:38
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, so what's the order?
• 33:40
  SPEAKER_05: I can't remember what it's called.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_05: The the little uh thing with the mushrooms and the bees.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_02: Oh yeah.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_02: We call it pastaitha.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_02: It's like a I guess.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_02: Say that again?
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_02: Pastaitcha.
• 33:51
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_06: It's like a why is there like a secret agent?
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, it's kind of like the little thing with the end flan.
• 33:59
  SPEAKER_05: Philip.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_05: That is the only time in the middle of the phone.
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_05: For all my Egyptian peeps.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_04: That's cream karamin.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_03: No shame.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_05: So Philip becomes the child in that situation.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_05: Isn't that what you guys call it, too?
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_05: Krim Karamins?
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I'm like for all my Egyptian peeps.
• 34:14
  SPEAKER_06: That's right, but they're tied.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_06: They're tied.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, now this is Ron Two.
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_06: Favorite color.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_06: Red.
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_06: Orange.
• 34:22
  unknown: Yeah.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_05: That's right.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_05: Well, sorry, it's orange in life, but you would prefer gray for a car.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_05: Like that silver, weird silver color.
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, I'll make it.
• 34:32
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 34:33
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 34:34
  SPEAKER_06: Favorite thing to eat for breakfast for each other.
• 34:38
  SPEAKER_03: Whatever I make her.
• 34:40
  SPEAKER_04: We're not really breakfast people.
• 34:41
  SPEAKER_04: I was gonna say that's if Zan ever eats breakfast.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, we're not gonna be able to get it.
• 34:45
  SPEAKER_04: We're not breakfast people.
• 34:46
  SPEAKER_04: Caffeinated and hangry.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_06: Uh favorite snack.
• 34:49
  SPEAKER_06: I don't know.
• 34:50
  SPEAKER_02: Cheese curls.
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_05: For me?
• 34:52
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_02: Ooh.
• 34:55
  SPEAKER_05: Philip's not also not a snacker.
• 34:57
  SPEAKER_05: So whatever it is that I buy in the pantry is what you're eating.
• 35:00
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 35:01
  SPEAKER_05: Alright.
• 35:01
  SPEAKER_03: I'm just I'm not just not very picky.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_03: I guess.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, okay.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_03: Philip is not, yeah, you're not picky.
• 35:05
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, I'm very picky.
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_05: You're very not.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, honestly, Philip is way more adventurous.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_04: That's what I'm saying, breaking the stereotype, right?
• 35:11
  SPEAKER_04: You have like Gilene, who is Egyptian, and she like does not eat spicy food.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_04: She doesn't eat anything with that even spiceful.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_04: She's very like bland, like salt and pepper are like.
• 35:20
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, wouldn't call me bland.
• 35:21
  SPEAKER_05: I'm definitely very colorful in my life.
• 35:23
  SPEAKER_06: I'm talking about your taste for food.
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, it's okay, Gilen.
• 35:26
  SPEAKER_06: She's always making fun of me for the same thing.
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, but Philip will be.
• 35:32
  SPEAKER_05: You chose this life.
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_04: And then, yeah, and then Philip will just like he'll he'll try anything.
• 35:37
  SPEAKER_04: He'll eat whatever.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_04: He eats spicy food.
• 35:39
  SPEAKER_04: So Alright.
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_04: Favorite singer or band?
• 35:42
  SPEAKER_02: Harry Styles.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, I feel like this is an unfair one because like when we first got married, you hit me with like Swedish House Mafia and all this like weird stuff, and I was like, So I don't know.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_05: And you listen to like Jurassic Park or Five or whatever their name is.
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_05: Jurassic Park.
• 35:58
  SPEAKER_07: I haven't listened to Jurassic Five in a while.
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_03: Jurassic Five.
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_03: I don't even know what that is.
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_05: See what I mean?
• 36:07
  SPEAKER_05: He he listened, his his musical taste is like sophisticated.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_05: No, it's like the equivalent of like spam for food.
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_05: Oh, come on.
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_05: Meanwhile, I'm over here.
• 36:18
  SPEAKER_05: Damn, anybody out there who is in supporting Jurassic or Jurassic Five, we apologize.
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I don't, I I I I'm not saying it's bad, I just don't know.
• 36:27
  SPEAKER_05: We both listen to all different genres.
• 36:30
  SPEAKER_05: So at any given day, you'll hear anything from like house to Abdel Halim to uh hairy styles to so much rock, Bon Jovi.
• 36:42
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 36:42
  SPEAKER_06: Alright.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, so biggest fear.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_06: Like you gotta tell me what's her biggest fear, and you tell me what's his biggest fear.
• 36:50
  SPEAKER_03: Biggest fear version?
• 36:51
  SPEAKER_03: Uh-huh.
• 36:52
  SPEAKER_03: Um kids getting lost.
• 36:54
  SPEAKER_07: Yes, yeah.
• 36:55
  SPEAKER_04: Oh.
• 36:55
  SPEAKER_04: I was gonna say bugs.
• 36:57
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, bugs too, yeah.
• 36:58
  SPEAKER_04: Bugs, bugs like actually.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_04: But that's a real everyday fear and so.
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_04: The kids getting lost, they have to go out to do that.
• 37:04
  SPEAKER_05: But if the bugs are like I feel like the bugs are gonna come for my kids one day.
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, the bugs, the bugs, the bugs is like out of control.
• 37:12
  SPEAKER_05: What about if you like bugs?
• 37:14
  SPEAKER_05: Uh uh.
• 37:16
  SPEAKER_05: Not bugs.
• 37:18
  SPEAKER_05: Your biggest fear is losing me.
• 37:22
  SPEAKER_06: Philip, it's okay, you can be honest.
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_06: If that's not the fear, that's not your biggest fear.
• 37:26
  SPEAKER_03: That is not my biggest fear.
• 37:28
  SPEAKER_06: Top ten, top ten.
• 37:30
  SPEAKER_03: She's not gonna eat anything if I'm not here.
• 37:32
  SPEAKER_06: That's true!
• 37:32
  SPEAKER_05: I choose to fend for myself.
• 37:35
  SPEAKER_05: Yes.
• 37:36
  SPEAKER_03: Where is she gonna get her coffee from?
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_05: I'm not a hunter or a pillager, Philip.
• 37:39
  SPEAKER_05: I was not meant for the case.
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_04: It's not called a hunter and a pillager, it's a hunter and a gatherer.
• 37:43
  SPEAKER_04: And a gatherer.
• 37:47
  SPEAKER_04: A pillager is somebody who goes and like a viking.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, but it takes down.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_05: I'm not good at that either.
• 37:52
  SPEAKER_05: Oh my god.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_05: I don't know.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_05: What's your biggest fear, Philip?
• 37:56
  SPEAKER_05: I feel like I give you so much security, you don't have time to have a fear.
• 38:00
  SPEAKER_06: She's trying to say it all sweet.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_06: I don't have time for fear.
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody's feeding me and the kids.
• 38:08
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you don't have one.
• 38:11
  SPEAKER_03: No, I don't have heights.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_04: I'm sure everybody has a fear.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_05: You're afraid of being eaten by a whale.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_03: No, I mean heights, I guess, is is kind of there.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 38:19
  SPEAKER_05: You're not afraid of being eaten by a whale?
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_04: When the hell is he gonna beat a whale?
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_01: No, I I I think biggest.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_05: What if we go to Alaska for a next family vacation?
• 38:26
  SPEAKER_05: I really want to go to Alaska.
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_05: Okay, I feel like we should move on to the next segment.
• 38:29
  SPEAKER_05: He's he's now talking crazy.
• 38:30
  SPEAKER_05: You don't want to go to Alaska.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_05: No, I don't want to go to Alaska.
• 38:32
  SPEAKER_06: Dude, that would be so cool.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_04: Right?
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, let's go.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_04: We are so losing track of these questions.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, um, because we're gonna like wrap it up, but like you mentioned Arabic music.
• 38:41
  SPEAKER_06: Who's your favorite?
• 38:42
  SPEAKER_01: My favorite?
• 38:43
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_06: You've been in this culture for a while, also?
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um I started out to give the right answer.
• 38:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 38:52
  SPEAKER_03: Um I It doesn't have to be favorite, just someone.
• 38:56
  SPEAKER_06: Okay.
• 38:57
  SPEAKER_03: Uh he's his voice is very iconic.
• 39:00
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 39:00
  SPEAKER_03: I would say.
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_03: Um God, I can't I can't remember who else.
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_03: Not Amid.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_04: But it's more like songs and I was gonna say he likes Hamada Diab.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I was gonna say not Amadieb.
• 39:11
  SPEAKER_01: But it's more like songs than Amb.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, yeah.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, yeah, yeah.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_06: Okay, okay.
• 39:15
  SPEAKER_06: Um, yeah, I mean, did you wanna add anything else?
• 39:18
  SPEAKER_06: I'm good.
• 39:19
  SPEAKER_06: I feel like this is a good podcast.
• 39:20
  SPEAKER_06: Henan spoke the least.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_04: That's kind of my job as hosting is to let the people on the podcast talk.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_05: I think I spoke the least.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_05: Also, I want to make sure that all of your viewers know that we are in a very loving relationship.
• 39:32
  SPEAKER_04: And they're not so not.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_03: We don't have pet names, but we definitely have a dynamic.
• 39:38
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, there's they're so not like what you guys see here.
• 39:41
  SPEAKER_04: So just we're we're very fun.
• 39:43
  SPEAKER_05: Don't come after her.
• 39:43
  SPEAKER_04: She really is.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_05: Oh my god, if you guys come after me, who will brighten your day?
• 39:48
  SPEAKER_05: If you come for me, you're coming for my husband.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_04: I mean, if you come for her, she's just not gonna respond.
• 39:53
  SPEAKER_04: That's pretty much gonna happen, but this it can work.
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_06: Intercultural marriages can work.
• 39:59
  SPEAKER_05: I think as long as the the two people in the relationship have a really great foundation and a really great understanding, and they got their own dynamic, the rest of the world will always have opinions.
• 40:11
  SPEAKER_05: They will always have something to say.
• 40:13
  SPEAKER_05: But as long as there's an understanding here, that's really all that matters.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_05: So what you guys see, what you guys see, is very different than what the life that we experience looks like.
• 40:23
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 40:23
  SPEAKER_05: And go ahead, Philip.
• 40:25
  SPEAKER_03: I'll take it just some flexibility, some patience.
• 40:27
  SPEAKER_06: A lot of patience.
• 40:28
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 40:28
  SPEAKER_03: Sometimes a lot of patience.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you're absolutely right.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_06: I I I do, I I am very patient.
• 40:33
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you're so patient.
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_03: And I appreciate that.
• 40:35
  SPEAKER_03: That's true.
• 40:37
  SPEAKER_04: My skin.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, we I just thought Yeah, I we we just felt like it was really important to show you guys that this can work.
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_04: It can work out.
• 40:46
  SPEAKER_04: Like, and it's and it and everybody fits in together, and it's not like an awkward puzzle, and it's it doesn't, it doesn't take effort.
• 40:54
  SPEAKER_04: It's easy if you actually wanna, you know, if you want to do it, and if you're like what Philip was saying, if you have patience, if you have flexibility, um, it could work.
• 41:02
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, but that's for any marriage, really.
• 41:03
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, but when I mean, each other as people and not as like a cultural thing.
• 41:07
  SPEAKER_05: Right?
• 41:07
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 41:08
  SPEAKER_05: You have to understand that you're marrying one person, but you're taking on their cultures and their traditions.
• 41:12
  SPEAKER_05: Absolutely.
• 41:13
  SPEAKER_05: And you have to make sure that if you choose to have children in that relationship, that your kids understand both sides and they understand both backgrounds.
• 41:20
  SPEAKER_05: So we do a pretty good job, I think, of making sure that our kids know that they're Egyptian and they're Dutch.
• 41:26
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, that they're also American.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 41:28
  SPEAKER_03: But it's 100% a benefit, it's not a crutch, it's not a detriment.
• 41:32
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 41:32
  SPEAKER_05: It's I'm still waiting for my EU passport, but like we'll we'll talk about that off tomorrow.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, sounds good.
• 41:37
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_06: And and yeah, like Gilana is just funny.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_06: And you know, I'm just trying to help you out because you probably get some comments, you know.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_06: She's really okay.
• 41:47
  SPEAKER_06: I mean, I honestly will.
• 41:49
  SPEAKER_04: But but think about it, like I wanna like, you know, because you know, she was saying, Oh guys, this is like not, you know, giving a disclaimer.
• 41:55
  SPEAKER_04: I actually think it's pretty great because think about it like this.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_04: If you can be yourself 110% in any relationship, that means it's healthy, that means you're happy and it's fun.
• 42:03
  SPEAKER_04: It's yeah, it's never boring.
• 42:04
  SPEAKER_04: It's like what everybody should strive to be.
• 42:06
  SPEAKER_04: And so it's not boring.
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it's not no, it is not boring.
• 42:10
  SPEAKER_04: Why would you want it to be boring?
• 42:11
  SPEAKER_04: Exactly.
• 42:12
  SPEAKER_04: Exactly.
• 42:14
  SPEAKER_04: Does he look like he needs help?
• 42:16
  SPEAKER_04: Blink twice twice.
• 42:16
  SPEAKER_04: Blink twice if you need help.
• 42:18
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah, blink twice.
• 42:21
  SPEAKER_06: Well, that's it for this episode.
• 42:24
  SPEAKER_06: Thanks.
• 42:24
  SPEAKER_06: Thanks for coming to our formal uh living room.
• 42:27
  SPEAKER_06: And thank you to Jillanne and Philip for uh letting us in your home and messing up your like your formal sitting.
• 42:35
  SPEAKER_06: Your salon, exactly.
• 42:37
  SPEAKER_06: We will clean up.
• 42:38
  SPEAKER_06: Thank you guys so much.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_06: Really appreciate it.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_03: And I just don't know why it had to take this long to be on your podcast, honestly.
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_04: I know, I know.
• 42:44
  SPEAKER_06: See, we can't say bye.
• 42:46
  SPEAKER_06: This is see, he's he's taking on the Adap thing where we can't say bye and say bye.
• 42:51
  SPEAKER_04: We're gonna start the recording all the way up until we walked out the door.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_04: Exactly, exactly.
• 42:55
  SPEAKER_04: No, but thank you guys for joining us.
• 42:57
  SPEAKER_04: We'll see you guys.
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_04: Yellow, yeah.
• 42:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yella bumper.