Latest / The Multiverse Collective / Wild Wild West E11: There's a Snake in my Holy Water!

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Wild Wild West E11: There's a Snake in my Holy Water! · The Multiverse Collective

0:00
Just remember everyone back in like the 70s and 80s
0:03
handkerchiefs were a significant part of gay cruising culture.
0:06
Did I do this on purpose? Was it a nod to my community?
0:10
You'll never know it. Seems like someone's playing a
0:21
trick on me. First Jebediah kills my wife and
0:26
son and now I find out that some bitch called Lilith has a coin
0:31
of my wife. I'm hoping that this Guild that
0:35
Chicken has been talking about will lead me to get revenge on
0:38
both of these assholes. OK, so where we last left you
1:45
guys, you were leaving chickens. Cute little cabin.
1:50
Definitely, definitely not a Brokeback Mountain situation
1:54
between Slick and chicken, despite the tension.
1:57
I think there was in those 45 seconds that Itchy and Arthur
2:01
were out of that cabin. You never know what could happen
2:03
in 45 seconds. No, we do, because we talked
2:07
about it. There was a whole scene about
2:09
it. And Chicken had sent you guys on
2:14
your way to Sweetwater, TX to meet up with Preacher King
2:18
Curtis, who he says will be able to or sorry, Pastor King Curtis
2:22
or Preacher King Curtis. I don't remember.
2:23
It's my character and I don't remember.
2:25
You can figure it out yourselves.
2:27
What you said was going to help you.
2:31
Was it sweet? I thought.
2:32
It was Friendsville or whatever. Is it like it always?
2:34
Is Friendsville. You're absolutely right, it's
2:36
Friends. But it just came from
2:38
Sweetwater. I'm so sorry, everyone.
2:40
My brain is scrambled eggs. But before we find you on the
2:45
road, I think we find you all outside.
2:48
And I mean, something's very significant did also happen in
2:51
in Itchy's interlude where he traded his beloved horse for a
2:57
wheel of cheese. I don't.
3:01
How much of this do you think you remember?
3:03
All right, I'm not quite sure what you're talking about.
3:05
Itchy's never had a horse. No, I mean, itchy, you have a
3:10
horse. Don't worry about that.
3:12
But this horse that's outside, that's waiting for you is not.
3:17
He lacks that pizzazz. There's no sense of like, that's
3:20
showbiz baby here. This is just a fucking horse and
3:25
the other horses that are standing outside are like way
3:27
less unsettled by this animal as well.
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I, I imagine that when Ichi looks at it and he gets a
3:35
thought of like, you know, having some like crazy fun coked
3:40
up friend adventure with, with his buddy, not Evander.
3:45
I think instead of like getting the memory, there's just like
3:48
static that plays in Ichi's head.
3:51
Yeah. Oh.
3:52
Which actually brings me to my next point.
3:54
And Ichi and Arthur. I need sanity roles from the two
3:58
of you. Eyes are wide open to who you
4:01
are and what you've done is. It one DI can't remember.
4:03
Was it 1D62-D6? Fucking. 8D6.
4:07
You know, let me look since I haven't made you guys do this
4:09
yet. We're going to remember this
4:11
together and it's been a long time since I came up with these
4:13
rules. I believe it is just rolling
4:16
your straight smarts. Oh great.
4:19
If someone manages to pull it up before I do, that's amazing, but
4:22
I do believe it's just a straight smarts roll.
4:26
I got 2 successes. 2 successes. Hey Riley.
4:29
Yeah, what happens when I roll 2 ones?
4:32
What happens when you roll 2 ones?
4:34
You know, I didn't expect you to just.
4:36
God, this really is the fucking dichotomy of man right here.
4:40
But yeah, so Arthur, you're holding it together fine.
4:43
Like, it's not great inside your mind.
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I mean, you're like holding your wife's soul coin in your pocket
4:48
right now. And you still have no idea how
4:51
this happened, why it's here, how it found its way into your
4:55
possession. And like, obviously this is some
4:57
greater conspiracy just to fuck with you, but you know you're as
5:00
together as a man of the situation could be, but itchy.
5:03
Itchy. You just traded your horse for a
5:05
wheel of fucking cheese to some sort of arch devil and nobody
5:11
ate your Mac and cheese either, so it was like not worth it at
5:15
all, even for the bit. And now you have this fucking
5:18
thing. I mean, like, look at it.
5:19
This is not Evander. It looks like Evander.
5:22
It smells like Evander. It's a horse.
5:24
It moves like a horse does, but not like Evander does.
5:28
And this is your fault too. You did this again.
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AGAIN. You've already shot your fucking
5:35
horse and now you've traded it for a wheel of God damn cheese.
5:40
Ichi, what's wrong with you? I have I have an idea.
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Hit me. I think, I think Ichi just has a
5:49
full on fucking mental breakdown.
5:51
Describe it to me. How does this play out?
5:57
So Ichi, we may want to put a trigger warning in here for
6:01
fucking like split personalities.
6:04
But I'm imagining that Ichi just immediately, he walks out of the
6:08
house and he sees this horse that is not his horse, realizing
6:13
that he traded it for a fucking wheel of cheese for a God damn
6:18
bit. And I think Ichi, you see him,
6:23
you see him walk up his kind of normal itchy self.
6:27
Hey, Evander, how we doing? That's not Evander.
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That's a fucking fake. No, come on.
6:32
That's Evander. It looks like Evander.
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It sounds like Evander. No, that's not Evander.
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That's that's something else. Slick.
6:43
Yeah, yeah, I see it. Should have knock him out again.
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I'm not going to say no. Itchy just turns around and
6:54
looks at you. He's he's smiling, but he has
6:57
just empty eyes and he, just like y'all would do it too if
7:02
you're in the same position. As me as soon as you start
7:06
fucking crazy laugh fucking after just fall on decks in.
7:13
Can Itchy try and like catch the fist?
7:16
Are we doing a pose rolls? Yeah, you guys can do a posed
7:19
athletics rolls. I'm cool with that.
7:22
Do I get my my fancy dancey extra dice?
7:25
You don't get your fancy dancey extra dice against another
7:29
player character. No, because you both have deals
7:31
with double SI. Mean two sixes is pretty hard to
7:35
beat anyway. Yeah.
7:37
What are we rolling? You are rolling just straight
7:39
athletics. Wait, which is?
7:42
Straight athletics I. Want to get an extra 1 anyway
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because I mean bigger. That's three sixes and I cannot
7:50
make this up. Good God, good God.
7:54
All right. We've only rolled ones and sixes
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and it's been 5 minutes into this thing.
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Would I would I be able to add a die to this using a special
8:04
times point? I think since you just.
8:07
I really want to do the cool thing.
8:10
You just rolled like a serious failure.
8:13
I I guess you are in the middle of like a really serious mental
8:16
break. But if you use your special
8:18
times role now, it will have implications throughout the rest
8:21
of the session. Fuck it, let's do it.
8:25
Oh no all. Right, that's three die.
8:29
All right, that's a six. Great.
8:32
Holy shit that's a six. Great.
8:35
God damn it, if I roll, if I roll a third six, I'm fucking
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cursed. What the fuck?
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Read it and God damn weep. That's one.
8:46
So was it 3 sixes to three sixes just now?
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That's. 2 and that's fucking 3. OK, so here's what we're gonna
8:54
do. Here is what we're gonna do.
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One of you is gonna call odds, one of you is gonna call evens,
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and we're gonna have Slick roll a die.
9:04
Oh shit, rope Rochambeau for it. All right, I'm calling evens
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Even Stevens, baby. OK, I'll go odds.
9:13
Odds 5. All right, Arthur, you get your
9:17
punch off. Tell me what happens.
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Oh, it's a full on like punch straight in the jaw, like this
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bit of the jaw which has the nerve that turns your brain off
9:30
just so we just flops to the ground, just so we don't have to
9:33
deal with the crazy maniacal two person one man deal for a bit.
9:39
Yeah, yeah, that's fair. Ichi, how are you in this
9:43
moment? I think Ichi takes the punch and
9:47
he's just like laughing. He's just like, it's a good shot
9:52
kid and he drops. Yep, yeah, fully tracks Chicken
9:58
has locked his door in case you don't bite me.
10:02
That's understandable. Are you guys going to like, haul
10:12
Itchy's feeble little body up onto the back of Not Evander,
10:17
which is the official name of this horse in my documentation
10:20
now? We should probably just throw
10:22
him up on the saddle and just like, lay him sideways over it.
10:25
Yeah, just so that we can start walking and just lead his horse
10:29
as we go. Yeah, I think that makes a lot
10:31
of sense. And you can just head towards
10:33
Friendswood unless there's anything else you're trying to
10:36
do along the way. Friendswood, not Sweetwater.
10:38
Friendswood. Sorry everyone.
10:42
I don't. Think there's anything?
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I had so many epiphanies last session that have all
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disappeared from me in this moment in time.
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I mean it's only been like 2 months since we played.
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Welcome to my fucking world. It's the beard.
10:57
I've lost the beard and army power has gone with it.
10:59
As all your memories was in it. So I have this, I have the site
11:03
now right? I remember seeing a thing.
11:07
So what happens if I look at not Evander?
11:10
Do you see a regular ass horse? I think you didn't have your
11:15
site before when you would look at when you've seen Evander,
11:18
correct? I mean, it's like you had sight
11:20
and and saw Evander, but yeah, are there.
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I had looked at him but all I could tell was there's something
11:24
weird I like. You never gave me anything
11:25
specific about it, you just thought there was something off.
11:28
Yeah, yeah. And you wouldn't have any more
11:31
details now, but this horse, when you look at it, is totally
11:34
normal. There's not anything weird about
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it. That instantly makes me
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suspicious with you, Riley, I'm not going to lie to you.
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I think that's incredibly fair. Yeah, it's like we'll just toss
11:50
Itchy up over the back of this horse and I don't know, let's
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just get on the road and we'll figure it out once we get out of
11:57
here. We need to get these weapons.
12:00
Yeah, sounds good to me. And then I'm going to, as we're
12:04
starting right, I'm going to look at slick and but.
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So you knew this whole time that Byron Black was part of your
12:11
little fucking? Gang thing.
12:14
I didn't, did I? That was a review.
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For me too. You didn't know.
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I, I, I never made the connection for it.
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No, no, no, I, I Honestly, it tracks, what with the card and
12:28
all that, but I never made the connection.
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But. You know what?
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I believe you. If I'd have known something, I'd
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have told. You, you're the you're the
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sanest out of the three of us. I'm not going to lie to you.
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Hey, it comes with the territory.
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I got it on the shit early so I'm pretty used to it at this
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point. I feel like there was something
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but I don't know what it was also.
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We're supposed to be figuring out a code name for Arthur.
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Oh yeah, that's right. We thought of one, but it was so
13:00
long ago I have no idea what it would be.
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I feel like we had a really good one.
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I'm sure, I think. Mine was scratchy.
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Scratchy was a good one, but. Wild.
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Because we then we have itchy and scratchy and slick, which
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is. Which is a recipe for a really
13:17
rough STI. Thank you, I made that exact
13:25
same joke last session. Thank you for laughing again.
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Look, I have a goldfish memory, all right?
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You can make the same gift for several days in a row and I'll
13:35
laugh it. It's.
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What I'm here for? OK, so we had the Shepherd,
13:41
something trying to work purred into the nickname, and then
13:45
Rye's suggestion was Fister. I forgot about that.
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I completely forgot about that. I stand by it.
14:01
But I and I don't even think I was drunk for that, which is
14:05
even Wilder. That was a sober thought, which
14:09
is even more concerning somehow. But yeah, and you don't have to
14:13
decide right now. I mean you have a.
14:15
It's a. It's a few.
14:16
Days ride, it's a few days ride and honestly, you know, not to
14:20
be bleak, but it's probably too little too late coming up with a
14:24
a nickname for for Arthur given you know everything that's
14:28
already happened. They probably already know your
14:31
name, bud. Yeah, it is.
14:34
It is true. But it's the new people that are
14:38
the problem. Oh, that was it, Viper.
14:41
Clemson was a was a good one. That is a good one.
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Viper is a fun name, and that'll actually, you know, circle back
14:50
around here in a minute. You'll find out when you find
14:53
out. I'm so scared of everything you
14:56
say. There was also biceps and
14:59
fistor. Rattlesnake Champagne.
15:02
Beefcake Mccleary was another option that.
15:04
Is priced. That is.
15:07
The most Himbo name ever. What were we doing?
15:14
I was like ready to run this session the next day and I
15:17
remember none of this. It's, I mean, it's fully
15:23
probably been 7 or 8 weeks since we've recorded this.
15:28
We had a first and then it's been 3 weeks since then.
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Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
15:34
So sorry, gang. Was six weeks off and then three
15:37
weeks. Yeah, it was that.
15:39
Was in two months, yeah. Jesus.
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Yeah, well, it explains why I really don't know what's going
15:44
on, but we're. All sort of out of it.
15:46
We're going to get there, we're going to get there.
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OK, back at it on the road to Friendswood, Which, sorry
15:55
residents of Friendswood, I shockingly didn't do a colossal
15:59
deep dive on your shitty Dallas suburb.
16:02
I just glanced over it. So I will not be eviscerating it
16:07
as I have Bonne Terre and the other tiny little towns that I
16:11
spend a lot of time hyper fixating on for the sake of this
16:14
podcast. Honestly I thought it was a nick
16:16
or just a fake name that doodle made.
16:19
No, no, noodle. Noodle picked a real ass place.
16:23
He picked a real ass place. So if you live there, fuck you,
16:29
I guess. I don't know.
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I refuse to apologize for my actions and that's all.
16:38
We're slowly alienating one city at a time.
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Yeah. They're not good cities though,
16:44
so it doesn't matter to me. If you live outside of New York
16:47
City, you live in the country and fuck you.
16:49
But yeah, it's like it's gonna be solid two, 2 1/2 days I think
16:57
from where you're at, because you're backtracking back in
17:00
towards more Central Texas near where Dallas is.
17:03
You know, I think itchy probably after like four or five hours,
17:07
you sort of come to again. And I think the head trauma
17:09
definitely helped shake you out of your very, very unstable
17:14
mental state. Obviously, there's a lot going
17:16
on in the background. Obviously you have a lot on
17:18
your. Mind, I think Ichi just looks
17:20
over at Arthur and he's just like, well, I don't know if I
17:25
don't know how much longer my jaw can take it, but I do
17:28
appreciate it quiet in my mind. You're very welcome.
17:34
Got to tame those demons. Somehow, honestly, it's, it's,
17:36
it's, it's a win win. You don't have the demons
17:39
talking. I get some rage out, you know?
17:43
Nice and therapeutic, Itchy looks down at his horse, waiting
17:48
for a a witty one liner that just comes in the form of
17:51
static. That's unfortunate.
17:55
Yeah, you normally feel like this deep connection that goes
18:00
just beyond the regular connection between a man and his
18:02
horse. And I'm not talking about
18:03
beastiality. I'm talking about like true.
18:06
Dressage. Dressage.
18:09
I'm talking about dressage. And you just, you don't feel
18:12
that with this horse. Itchy.
18:14
He's just a horse and he's not a particularly intelligent one.
18:18
And it's not like he's stupid per SE, but it truly is like
18:23
there's nothing between his ears.
18:26
He's just a blank slate. If he were a human, he'd think
18:30
that he would not have to get. Used to this.
18:32
One of those featureless faces that you've started to see
18:35
increasingly more in your lives. I think Itchy just
18:40
compartmentalizes that and puts it to the back of his mind where
18:43
he doesn't need to think about for a while.
18:45
It's a good place to keep stuff. It's a good place to keep stuff.
18:49
Is there anything else that you guys talk about?
18:52
You're saying that you think you would.
18:55
Alright, so it is just a normal ass horse, right?
18:58
Or is it like, if we really look at it, is it a faceless demon?
19:02
Because it's what it's it's alluding to.
19:04
It's. Suspiciously very normal.
19:07
I think you need to look at it very closely if you want to
19:10
figure out more. Now I was thinking it was more
19:13
like a simile, like because it was like, it's not a vendor.
19:17
It didn't have a personality. Okay, would that be an actual
19:20
role? Yeah, that would be, that would
19:21
be a role for sure. Let me guess, it's an analyzer,
19:25
right? It would be an analyzer role,
19:26
yeah. Oh my God, how did you guess?
19:29
I'm shocked. That's cool I got 2 twos.
19:32
Never mind. If you're suspicious, you're
19:35
100% suspicious. Like the horse is too fucking
19:38
normal. Like even Bessie has some
19:41
element of personality and this horse is like.
19:43
So we've gone from over charisma to no charisma.
19:46
Exactly. This is the inverse of what
19:49
Evander was. It's like everything that made
19:52
Evander Evander is gone. Every single thing that made
19:55
Evander Evander is gone. And this is a living husk, but
20:00
it's a horse. Horses aren't supposed to have.
20:04
Does it look like a vander? Like is it the same?
20:07
Like identical. Shape and.
20:08
Identical. Horse doesn't even know how to
20:11
keep a rhythm. The horse can't even keep A4
20:15
four time walking. It's like every. 12341234.
20:21
Every element of personality was just sucked out with a vacuum,
20:26
and in its place it's been filled with just this
20:30
nothingness, just this vast nothingness.
20:33
But other than that, I think it's like a pretty quiet ride.
20:37
Yeah. Not a whole lot.
20:40
Not a whole lot to do, not a whole lot to talk about unless
20:43
you guys are trying to unpack your many internal feelings,
20:46
which seems suspicious for this crowd, but I'm not going to say
20:50
no if you guys decide. To do some, I've got a I've got
20:54
a crazy idea. Oh.
20:57
Are you going to talk? I'm not going to talk.
21:00
I'm going to. So I've still got the pouch of
21:03
19 silver coins. That isn't Clarice.
21:07
I'm going to take one of the silver coins out.
21:10
I'm going to lean over and touch it to not Evander.
21:13
You know, I honestly had the same thought, but I wasn't going
21:16
to say it. Oh Jesus Christ.
21:20
God, are we about to have a fucking boss battle God?
21:24
OK, give me one second while I think about how this would work
21:27
because I have. We should have waited until
21:29
after we had the silver bullets. Yeah, probably, but here we are.
21:34
We're just thinking about that, Chicken said.
21:37
It was a demon. It will react differently to how
21:39
we react to it, so. Yeah, it gets more power.
21:42
I'm. Not going to keep on it for long
21:45
enough. Why do I hear Final Fantasy 7
21:47
music? Is that the one wing Angel?
21:53
So here's what happens. You lean over and you touch this
21:59
silver coin to Evander. Well, to not Evander really.
22:05
And I think if it. Doesn't start doing the
22:07
Macarena. We know it's not the real no.
22:10
It it doesn't, but you see this flicker, right?
22:16
Like this flicker of personality washing over him, if that makes
22:19
sense. It's like, you know when like
22:21
the DVD logo is bouncing around on the TV screen back in the
22:26
day, back when that used to be a thing.
22:28
And it's like when it hits the corner and.
22:31
Everyone goes fucking wild. For this and everybody goes
22:33
fucking wild. So in this moment you see this
22:37
flicker of Evander, and do you see that his body has rotted
22:44
like a decomposing body would? His bones are exposed in places.
22:48
And. Oh, that's bad.
22:49
He takes the cone straight away. He takes the cone.
22:53
Straight away and it's like this molten magma like substance
22:57
where the rotting flesh is that just sort of undulates under
23:00
this this translucent membrane. And then as soon as you take the
23:03
coin away, it doesn't do that anymore.
23:06
In the distance here. Do we all see this or is it just
23:14
him because he's touching the coin?
23:15
I think anybody who's looking would see it.
23:18
I think it's. Probably for itchy sitting on
23:20
it. Pretty brief, yeah.
23:23
There are no like, you know you're not like getting.
23:26
Burned. To clarify, it's skin turned
23:29
transparent and that's what was. On Oh no it it turned into a
23:32
zombie horse is the way I heard it.
23:34
Yeah, it it was like I. Didn't know if that was
23:36
underneath it. Like didn't you say it had
23:37
transparent? It was like.
23:39
Wait a second, 2 + 2 = 4 right now?
23:43
Or three? Oh.
23:44
God. Riley is this.
23:48
The original Evander's corpse. Is it?
23:53
Oh guys, it's so cute when you figure something out.
24:01
Is this how I should be playing every time we play a wild?
24:04
I'm just never going to sleep on a Wild West, no.
24:07
I'm. So fucking proud.
24:12
Son, we need to get you a new horse.
24:15
I think I just, I did a role and if you want me to do a real, if
24:20
you want me to do a real role, I'll do it.
24:21
But I just did a role. And I think as this happened,
24:24
Ichi was just looking wistfully into the sky.
24:26
I think he missed it. Yeah, that's totally fine,
24:29
Itchy. I mean, you saw, you saw what
24:32
you saw when you went where you went and you are going to the
24:35
truth of this. I'm going to.
24:36
Notice that Itchy is looking into the sky wistfully.
24:40
Having a lovely time and I'm going to lean over to Slick but
24:44
Slick. Yeah.
24:49
He's on a fucking zombie horse. Well, I don't know if that's
24:55
better than the previous situation.
24:59
What? What do we feed it?
25:01
I don't know if it eats. Yeah, you haven't seen it.
25:04
Eat. I don't know what a horses eat.
25:08
Grain. Oh.
25:09
Fuck I forgot he can read. Mines.
25:10
Of course it is. Yeah, yeah.
25:14
Hey, don't think about. Cat No, I wasn't reading mines.
25:17
I can hear you. My ears perked up when you said
25:21
what a horses eat. How much wood would a woodchuck
25:24
Chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck wood?
25:27
I just looks back at Arthur and goes, you know, I don't really
25:33
know if there's a whole lot we can do about it until we get to
25:35
where we're going. Maybe this preacher can do
25:38
something about it. Exercise this horse.
25:41
And it's like as you observe the horse more, you're somebody
25:44
who's very used to having the site at this point and you don't
25:48
see any like evil. There's nothing you think so
25:54
about it. It's it's very benign.
25:56
It just is. It just is.
25:59
It's simply it's like to you, it's like a creature out of
26:02
place, like it clearly doesn't belong here, but it's assumed
26:07
this form and is doing horse stuff.
26:14
Like a Mongoose in an IKEA. We'll do booth stuff.
26:19
Well, for the time being, I don't think it's malignant.
26:22
So I don't think we should really worry about it at the
26:24
moment. I don't really know.
26:25
There's a whole lot we can do. OK.
26:28
But if it if it steps out a lot, I'm going to shoot that thing in
26:30
the fucking eyes. No, I'm right there with you.
26:34
Yeah. I don't think I would really do
26:35
anything about it at the moment, honestly.
26:38
Actually, it's like when you say, when you say if it gets out
26:41
of line, I'll shoot it. You'd notice itchy just wince
26:46
and try and look away. Yeah, Richie will shoot you.
26:51
I'm joking. I'm joking.
26:54
Don't bring the. The weird guy back you.
26:56
Have to clarify that. OK.
27:03
Is there anything else you guys want to see or do along the way
27:08
from Amadeus Springs to Friendswood?
27:11
I don't. Think so I I feel like we just
27:15
keep travelling. Off the top of my head, I don't
27:17
really think there's anything that Slick really wants or needs
27:21
to do until we can figure out this weapon.
27:24
Situation, anything that's going on with Holy Cedar, Chicken said
27:27
he was going to go and sort that out, so we've gotten the video
27:30
back there. For he is, yeah.
27:33
I don't if there's nothing else you guys want to do, I think
27:36
it's a pretty uneventful travel when you when you get to
27:39
Friendswood. It's been a couple of days.
27:42
It's, I don't know, it's not smaller than than Holy Cedar,
27:48
but it's not much bigger. It's definitely more
27:50
established, if that makes sense.
27:52
These buildings are a little bit more permanent.
27:54
There's more brick structures. There are more houses instead of
27:58
the tent encampment that Arthur was living at in the center of
28:00
town. But there is one tent, one large
28:04
tent of note at the very edge of the city, and outside of it
28:11
there is a painted sign that just says Holy Ghost Revival.
28:17
It's like looks. At the tent and goes please tell
28:19
me that ain't where our preacher friend is.
28:21
I don't. I hope he didn't come all this
28:23
way for a church revival camp. Excellent.
28:26
IA 100% think it's going to be. I was going to say, I'll bet you
28:31
a dollar that our preacher friend's in that tent.
28:34
God. All right, great.
28:39
I don't know, Sleek, look at it this way, how much worse can it
28:42
really get? And I think Itchy just walks in.
28:47
Flames. I've not been a praying man for
28:55
a long time. I'm going to take my hat off as
28:58
a as as respect because it's a holy place.
29:03
Yeah, absolutely it is. And then walk in.
29:11
Yeah, Slick walks in. He doesn't take it.
29:13
He's not. He's too deep in some weird shit
29:16
to care. Meanwhile, Itchy's like walking
29:18
in. He's got like mud on his boots.
29:22
God Riley, why a church revival commune?
29:27
Oh God I hate those hippies so much.
29:33
What do you mean you hate my hippies?
29:35
Is it? Going to be one of those ones,
29:36
one of those churches where they sing of.
29:39
Course it is. It's a revival, church man.
29:42
It's it's a little different. Nothing good happens when you
29:45
come across them in the woods. They just kidnap you.
29:49
That is that that remains to be seen, yeah.
29:53
At least it's not the. Woods The.
29:54
Three of you enter. It's great.
29:56
So when you enter, it's you know, it's dark, it's dim, it's
30:01
dusty. This is Texas, This is a dirt
30:06
floor. I mean, it's not even a true
30:09
floor. This is a canvas tent that's
30:11
held up with poles and rope. And, you know, there's a variety
30:15
of wooden folding chairs and aisles, and it appears to have,
30:19
like, a pretty decent capacity, but there's no one in the
30:22
chairs. And at the very front of the
30:24
tent is the pulpit on a shoddily constructed wooden stage.
30:28
And even from a distance, you can tell it's shoddily
30:30
constructed. And oddly, though, there are all
30:32
of these huge stock tanks, like livestock water tanks made of
30:39
tin, just around the room. You don't see anyone at the at
30:45
the at the moment, but there is like another tent flap towards
30:48
where the pulpit is at. Question, do these big tins
30:52
stock tin things have writing on them?
30:56
No. No, OK.
30:59
Are they are they in a position that we can see if they're full
31:03
or not? Or are they like too tall to see
31:04
inside of? Them you would have to walk over
31:06
to them to see they're sort of lined around the outer edges of
31:12
of the tent with more concentrated on the stage.
31:14
I'm I'm just curious if these are a ridiculous amount of holy.
31:18
Water. That's what I was thinking they
31:20
were. Just an unreasonable amount.
31:25
I think Ichi just flops down in one of these seats, just throws
31:28
his hands up, like, all right, explain this next crazy thing
31:32
we're going to see. Come on.
31:35
Ichi, I think we have to go for the next flap before you sit
31:39
down. No, I guarantee you somebody's
31:42
going to, we're going to sit down.
31:43
We're. We're just going to be sitting
31:45
here waiting for something to happen.
31:46
And somebody's going to come out and they're going to say that
31:49
they can, they can cleanse us or revive us or something.
31:53
And it's all right, OK, here's $500 and all right, they're
31:57
going to dunk us into a tank of water that's probably ain't even
32:01
no holier than the backside of a black bear.
32:04
And then we're going to leave and we're going to feel better
32:06
and we're going to be out of money.
32:10
Come, I just. I know how these things go, or
32:18
they're all right. It's OK.
32:20
Do I look like the kind of man to give $500 to anybody?
32:24
I don't know, maybe. I didn't even give you to a
32:27
share of the bounty money. He's got a point.
32:32
It's cool. I'm going to go.
32:33
I'm going to go back there. I'm going to find out what's
32:37
going on with all this freaky deaky shit, all this stuff that
32:40
looks like it's made out of paper mache, and we'll be on our
32:45
merry way. Yeah, yeah.
32:47
Here's hoping it's that easy, but you know it ain't.
32:50
But let's do it. Worse comes to worse, I know I
32:54
could use a bath full of holy water.
32:56
You could use more than a bath full just going to walk.
33:01
Yeah, Itchy sniffs his armpit. Yeah, you're just going to go
33:05
through the back flap in the tent.
33:06
Yeah, I'm not even going to like be like graceful and be like
33:09
hello. I'm going to be like just walk
33:11
in and she's like looking full. I'm throw throw it open.
33:14
If it was a door, he'd kick it like yeah.
33:16
It's. Like, is there anything you're
33:19
doing at this moment? Slick's just sort of licking,
33:23
but like he, I don't know, I, I think he would just stand near
33:29
Ichi. Like he's not committing to just
33:30
sitting down, but also he's like probably shouldn't leave him
33:34
alone with all this stuff. And I'm sure whatever's going on
33:37
back there, Arthur can handle it.
33:39
So. No, I was going to say Ichi's
33:42
going to Ichi's going to follow Arthur through.
33:44
Oh OK, yeah, if Ichi's following then yeah, I'm going to.
33:46
I just assumed that Ichi was going to sit and wait.
33:50
Yeah, Terra, are any of you looking any harder at anything
33:53
in the tent itself before you go through?
33:56
The It's a church. It's.
33:56
Always a validation. I don't think I don't think
33:59
using the site here is worth it. No, no, I don't think so.
34:05
I'm not going to use the site, but I'm going to.
34:07
I've I've learned better. I'm going to scrutinize.
34:10
Yeah, just roll me and analyze really fast.
34:13
You only need one success to figure out the.
34:15
Anything. Fun thing, yeah, to figure out
34:18
anything really. All right, sorry.
34:21
Remind me it's I get to add my analyze plus my bonus dice.
34:27
Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I see.
34:29
I see. You're smart, plus you're
34:31
analyze. I see.
34:33
All right, I did get one success.
34:35
Oh, sweet. As you pass a little close to
34:37
one of the stock tanks, you hear a rattle coming from it and then
34:41
you. What kind of a rattle?
34:43
Like a rattle, you can. Look like a like a baby rattle.
34:48
No. Yeah, I'll look.
34:51
Yeah, the tanks are full of snakes.
34:54
They're all rattlesnakes. Nice.
34:59
I told you nothing good happens. Fucking hey, oh hey, fillers.
35:06
Did you get away from that tank? You may want to come take a look
35:11
at this. Itch it.
35:14
The less we know, the better. Look, all I'm saying is that
35:19
ain't holy water you're going to be bathing in.
35:23
Who said I was going to have a bath here?
35:25
So you guys all make your way through the the back flap.
35:29
At some point, yeah. Yeah, I I just want to make it
35:33
very clear to the rest of the guys that the tanks are all
35:36
probably filled with snakes. Yeah, you would be correct.
35:41
In your analysis they are. All damn that doesn't happen.
35:44
God. Look at us analyzing things.
35:47
Analyzing things. I'm so proud of you guys.
35:49
I I could cry. I could weep tears of joy.
35:54
Successfully by the way. I know, yeah.
35:56
That was the that was the first success any of you have rolled
36:01
on the analyze check. I'm fairly confident, dim.
36:11
It's like a little office almost.
36:14
It's like a sub tent the size of my claw office set up on the
36:19
very back of this tent. And there's a desk and a chair
36:23
and a very, very large man sitting in the chair.
36:27
And he doesn't seem to see you, but he does turn towards you as
36:33
you come in, but his eyes are cloudy.
36:36
Have you been expecting us? We ain't quiet.
36:40
We ain't quiet, Arthur. Do you know your holy water
36:44
tanks are full of snakes? Heat size, just for a moment.
36:53
What's the air velocity of an unladen swallow?
36:59
You 3 sure ask a lot of questions.
37:03
I'm not surprised. When you say this guy is big,
37:06
how big are like? So a.
37:11
Normal human height, big. Not an unreasonable.
37:14
Oh, this guy is like, this is big.
37:16
This is the tallest, largest man you've ever seen in your life.
37:20
I didn't know if you're talking like 9 feet tall.
37:22
Like he's a fucking giant, he's still a height that a human
37:25
could feasibly be without having like gigantism, but he he's like
37:28
6768 and easily £400. He is a big fucking dude.
37:33
So you just, so you just pulled like a like fucking Vince
37:37
Wilfork into the campaign. Nice.
37:40
Yeah, fuck it, why not? Yeah, whoever that is, we'll go
37:43
for it. I was thinking more like Shaq.
37:45
Look him up after. I was literally also thinking
37:47
Shaq. He is Shaq sized.
37:52
He's he's probably a little huskier than Shaq is.
37:56
Well, he has cloudy eyes. This guy.
37:58
Can I roll and analyze the discover of this man is blind?
38:02
Of course you can. Oh my God.
38:04
Oh shit, we're all using a brain cell today, boys.
38:07
This is incredible. You guys have the brain cell
38:10
today. I don't which is.
38:11
Dangerous 1 success. Yeah, you can pretty easily tell
38:14
that he has either incredibly limited vision or is fully
38:18
blind. He's not like tracking your
38:21
movements, he's just his head is pointed in the direction of
38:24
where the sound is coming from. Guys, be careful.
38:27
I think his vision is based on movement.
38:30
Itchy freezes. I like pick up a pick up a like
38:36
a loose stone off the floor and throw it.
38:40
Like, just like. I think you're right.
38:47
Are are you by? Are you by chance a
38:51
Tyrannosaurus Rex? A what?
38:58
Sorry, ignore him. Sorry, I think I read one too
39:02
many books. Yeah, you take one point of
39:05
psychic damage, by the way. Itchy.
39:07
Great. Sorry, Sonia, he has, yeah, he
39:11
has demons in his blood. And we're we're trying to get
39:13
that sorted but. Are you by chance a preacher?
39:19
What is it, King Curtis? I am.
39:22
Pastor King Curtis. It doesn't quite matter what you
39:26
call me. My friends call me Curtis, not
39:29
King. You can just call me Curtis.
39:31
But to clarify, King is your first name.
39:34
Unfortunately, my Mama had aspirations.
39:38
Fucking based. I understand.
39:43
That's why my Mama named. Me Ichi.
39:45
Yep, tracks. We we have a mutual friend.
39:50
Well, we have a mutual we, we work for these guys now, right?
39:56
Working alongside I wouldn't say working for.
40:00
A work in progress, one might call it.
40:03
We have a mutual friend I. Heard that the three of you
40:07
would be coming. I've been anticipating, so to
40:12
speak. How?
40:14
How did you find out faster than we travelled here?
40:18
There's more than one way to skin a cat, son.
40:21
Arthur, when people lose their sight, the rest of their senses
40:26
get better. He probably hurt us from
40:29
Sweetwater. It should that that's not how it
40:32
works. Now, Sweetwater, I heard the
40:36
three of you got into some trouble in Sweetwater.
40:39
I'd be real concerned if I were you.
40:43
Actually, we didn't really get into trouble in Sweetwater.
40:45
We just sort of. Surprisingly not.
40:47
But I'm a day of spring is just outside of Sweetwater.
40:51
I'm not surprised that the three of you don't know you got into
40:54
trouble in Sweetwater, but the three of you got into trouble in
40:57
Sweetwater. Is it when we broke the
41:00
bartender? I don't know anything about what
41:04
you did or didn't do to a bartender, but there's been
41:09
talk. I don't quite know how to
41:13
explain this to all of you. I can see, but I can't see.
41:17
You understand? Nope.
41:20
That's all right. I think one of your smarter
41:22
friends can explain it to you. But golly, how do I say this?
41:28
I mean, you've made some real poor choices in the last several
41:31
months, you know that, right gentlemen?
41:34
That I can agree. With you are you are tied up six
41:37
ways to someday. It's a mess.
41:40
And, and now she knows that the three of you are out here
41:44
sniffing around and that's a it's real bad if she knows.
41:49
I mean, you know who I'm talking about, right?
41:53
The lady. Chicken to tell, is Lilith
41:55
correct? I'm pretty sure.
41:56
Yeah. I'm going to pull out a climb
41:58
and just be like. This bitch.
42:01
Oh wait, you can't. You can't see.
42:03
Yeah, I mean if you if you pull. The pitch with six sides.
42:07
Yeah, that that one. And you'd you'd spoken to one of
42:13
her thralls. The bartender I'm.
42:15
Going to look at Slick. What the fuck is a frawl?
42:21
Somebody who sort of is under the control of a demon, I think.
42:25
Are you talking about the bartender or?
42:28
That's the only person we spoke to in Sweet.
42:30
Chicken isn't a thrall of Lilith.
42:33
I don't quite know everything. I didn't.
42:38
I didn't make a very smart deal either, gentlemen.
42:42
Wait, are you talking about the judge back in Holy Cedar?
42:47
He would, he would have said Holy Cedar.
42:50
I don't want to be reductive because Lilith certainly has her
42:54
share of thralls, but she did know that you were the three of
43:00
you who were going to go poke around Amadeus Springs and that
43:05
happens to be very important place for her.
43:07
Oh, it was. That guy.
43:09
Oh, the demon. The demon the chicken killed.
43:12
I gotcha. I gotcha.
43:14
OK, we didn't. Well, to be fair, we didn't
43:16
really talk. No, no, but.
43:18
We shot it a lot and it didn't die, and then chicken shot it
43:21
and it did die and that's sort of why we're here, to be honest.
43:24
Yeah, I know that's why y'all are here and I'm, I'm ready to
43:29
to give y'all, you know, gentlemen, the help that you
43:31
require to to take care of our mutual problem, so to speak.
43:38
But first, right? You're your friend over there.
43:43
And he gestures with his head. It's itchy.
43:47
You all right, son? Itchy waves.
43:49
No, no Sir, I ain't I. Think you and I have something
43:53
in common? Slick looks at Itchy.
43:56
Are you blind too? Do you have a dancing horse?
44:01
You also do dressage. I also met the devil once, and I
44:07
I searched his eyes for a sign of love or mercy or good, and I
44:14
only found darkness. And you?
44:17
I can't even fucking see, son, but I can tell you've seen that
44:20
same darkness. What'd you get rid of?
44:23
What'd you trade? Itchy shudders.
44:25
Just above table. That was metal as fuck.
44:34
What'd you trade, son? Too much.
44:52
If the moon gives up rising, the sun stops and shining, you know
45:00
you've got a hand to hold. As we wait on the timing
45:09
together, we find it. There's more than one way to go
45:15
home. Yeah, there's more than one way
45:21
to go home.