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Oscar Mike Radio with Heidi Munro · Military Broadcast Radio | MBR Talk

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  We come here and we're going. To conquer.
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  And we're going to take some. Is that understood, Sir?
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  That's what we're going to do, sweetheart.
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  We are going to go and get some all.
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  slash OM radio to help. That's wreathsacrossamerica.org
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  slash OM radio. I remember a time when I was in
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  A and, you know, a not so good place and these games and these
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  activities and being able to, to come and, and have the
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  camaraderie that we have here. It, it, it makes me feel like,
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  you know, I'm not, I'm not alone.
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  There are people here that have been through what I, I've been
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  through. It makes me feel like, I don't
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  know, like, like I'm, I'm part of something great.
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  We're OM We're at the 10th Annual Elizabeth Dole
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  Foundation's convening event here at the Reagan Center in
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  Washington, DC And my next guest is Heidi.
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  These stories that you have heard from Michael Corman,
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  Joseph Kavanaugh and Heidi's next will really change the way
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  you look at care, love, family. It's just been really impactful.
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  Heidi, welcome to OM Radio. Thank you.
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  Thank you for having me. Absolutely, absolutely.
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  It's just an honor to be here with the word heroes thrown
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  around everywhere. You know, you, you, you dunk a
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  basketball, you're a hero. You, you do this, you're a hero.
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  You know, I'm a hero to my kids when I get the Internet right.
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  But I've been like humbled to talk to you all who are true
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  heroes. How did your caregiver journey
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  begin? So in December of 23, my
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  daughter, who is an active duty Army officer, I had just
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  graduated from the physician assistant program in San
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  Antonio, had come home for Christmas break and then was
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  driving to her first assignment for her clinicals.
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  And she was in a horrible, horrible car accident,
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  catastrophic severe brain injury, called us because she
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  would be dead by morning. So of course we rushed to be
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  with her, spent the time in the trauma hospital.
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  And then, and I don't want to go off in a tangent, but it it adds
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  to the story, I think, because we're military.
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  Are you sure? Right.
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  Yes. Where'd you serve?
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  I was Army National Guard but deployed to Iraq during the OIF
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  3. So her accident was in
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  Baltimore. Right car accident so she was
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  taken first to Baltimore. Shock Trauma where they saved
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  her life, but then after three or four days on life support,
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  told us that she wasn't going to make it.
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  We should take her off life support and just let her go.
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  And after, you know, praying about it and thinking about it
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  and you know, what do we do? Someone dear to me from Walter
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  Reed came over and stepped in and she was like, don't, don't
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  take that answer. The Army is here to help you.
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  We're going to do everything we can.
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  Move her from here to Walter Reed and don't give up hope.
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  Had I not had that, first of all, we probably wouldn't have
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  Vanessa with me. But we did do that.
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  She was transferred to Walter Reed, had a long, long recovery.
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  And now what, 16 months later is doing way better than expected.
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  So being in the military, you know, they, they did a great job
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  of taking care of her, but it was hard to know what I should
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  be doing to help them take care of her.
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  Can I ask a different kind of question?
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  Yes. So I talked to a Gold Star
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  mother recently who lost her son.
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  Not only did did your daughter go through this, but you serve,
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  you know what the, the, what the game is and the cost is.
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  But now you're seeing your flesh and blood in this state.
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  Did you feel a sense of, of you're powerless?
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  You can't help it. Well, and I, I'm, yeah, military
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  medical at the top of the. So you know at the top.
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  Of the scheme. So yeah, it was tough.
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  I've never been on the recipient side, I've always been on the
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  one taking care of people. So this is all new to.
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  You all new So anyway, back to the story is that they're taking
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  care of her, but I don't know where to get resources to help
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  take care of us while we're taking care of her housing.
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  And you know, we're from Idaho. This happened in Baltimore.
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  So now we're flying people back and forth and trying to be with
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  her and save her life. And, and it wasn't so the
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  accident was in December. It wasn't until June that a
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  nonprofit, Semper Fi, invited my husband and I to a caretaker
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  retreat or caregiver retreat that I learned what is out there
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  for the actually for the people taking care of my daughter.
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  The hospital is taking care of her.
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  We all need some kind of counseling or the family's going
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  to fall apart. We need to just get away from
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  it. The retreat helped us with that,
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  but while we were there, I met several people that were, had
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  been or are fellows at the Dole Foundation.
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  So I Facebook friend them and watch what they're doing.
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  And I started to realize that like, no, there's nobody in the
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  hospital that told me about this foundation that would know
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  nothing about it without other caregivers, right?
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  And so I looked at what some of them were doing and, and the
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  part of my professional life I'm missing.
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  And I thought, well, I'll do that someday.
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  But then I thought, why don't I do it now?
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  They're in DC, I'm in Bethesda building 62.
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  The soldier recovery unit has hundreds of, you know, I don't
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  know how many people are there now, but many people getting
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  Care now and their families are going through the same thing.
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  I went through even this morning, well looking away, but
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  even this morning while I'm here, I got a text from one of
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  those mothers saying I never knew this was out there and
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  they're in Bethesda. This is right across the river,
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  yeah. I didn't either, but I'm going
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  to help all of you learn more about it.
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  What? Was it like Hottie when you
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  realized that you weren't alone in this and you had the support
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  around? You so, so much of A relief.
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  Not not only did I not, I mean, of course, I know I'm not alone,
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  but what you learn from other caregivers that the, that the
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  medical system never gives you is unfathomable.
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  You know, I feel there's a part of me that, you know, I'm
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  retired. Well, I've retired because of
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  her injury, but I'm retired military.
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  I have an income. I'm not, you know, I don't
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  necessarily need financial support.
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  I'm not looking for charity. I don't even need a lot of what
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  the nonprofit's offer by ways of trips and retreat.
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  But I need the information that the people at those retreats are
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  giving up. You know, little things like
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  where do you take your loved one when they're to the rehab point
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  where they need to learn how to drive again?
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  The military, the VA doesn't do that for you.
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  But you know who does? Semper Fi, I think either Semper
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  Fi or Wounded Warrior. One of them has an end to, you
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  know, where do you go to get adjustments made to your car?
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  My daughter can't use her right arm.
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  She's slowly getting better in every way.
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  But just for the fun of it, I had her just sit in the car one
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  day and say, you know, tell me, tell me what it's like to drive.
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  What are you going to do? And she started, and the first
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  thing I realized was she can't even start the car because her
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  arm doesn't work, you know? But these are things the
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  hospital doesn't tell you, but fellow caregivers.
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  Does that make sense? It makes sense.
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  I mean, they're just focusing the patient, not all the stuff
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  after care. So you know that this whole
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  convening talks about, you know, they've got 4 pillars they're
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  working on, but the one that really speaks to me is the one
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  that integrates the healthcare systems.
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  So they do know that information.
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  Yeah, because I, I mean, like, you go to the hostel sometimes
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  and you get a sort of paper saying do this, this, this and
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  this. Yeah, it sounds like even in
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  Michael's case, you don't get a whole lot.
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  No, it's just you don't. Really get much you get great
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  care. I'm I will never say that she
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  hasn't gotten great care. But, you know, like Michael
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  Corman was talking about how the house had to be redone for his
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  father-in-law. You know, I didn't think about a
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  car. Yeah, I, I didn't either.
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  But you know who did? The other caregivers that have
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  been there, the car is one of the big things, but just like,
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  you know, once she was able to get out of the hospital and move
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  around a little, there's several places that have, you know,
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  retreats and places you can go just to connect with nature, get
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  out and walk. I wouldn't know about any of
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  this if it wasn't for other caregivers, and I don't, I had
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  never heard of anything like the Elizabeth Dole Foundation that
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  can collect those caregivers and match you up with people.
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  So the way they do it is that I'm assigned to Idaho because
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  that's where I'm from. So I represent Idaho, but
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  there's nothing to say I can't go back to Bethesda where I am,
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  which is what I plan to do, and just immediately start with all
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  of those family members in the SRU.
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  So both Michael and just talk about social media and its power
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  to connect other caregivers, are you?
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  Already working. Yeah, as soon as they enter, as
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  soon as the Elizabeth Doyle Foundation, you know, published
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  my picture and said welcome. Already getting people like, Oh
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  my God, do we have this in Idaho?
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  Do you know so and so can you? Can you help me?
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  Where can I go for this? It I can't even begin to imagine
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  as a parent, as a soldier yourself, what's been like for
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  you and your family? What's it like now?
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  You have the support from Elizabeth Doll Foundation, these
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  other orgs to start seeing your daughter come back.
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  What's that been like, Heidi? It's been amazing.
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  You know, Joseph talked a little bit about the faith part of it.
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  I mean, deep in my heart, I kind of always knew she would because
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  I have faith and I and I, you know, I just know that she's
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  coming back. But it's a pretty incredible.
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  I don't want when I tell her story, I don't want pity.
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  I don't like I said, I don't want financial resources.
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  I want other people that understand what she needs, what
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  we're going through. And I think another thing is
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  that we focus on the caregiver. Like there's only one in our
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  situation. It's not I had to, I'm employing
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  one of her best friends from high school to be there.
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  Like now when I'm not there, she goes to all of her appointments
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  with her, kind of takes care of her.
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  You know my husband, that we, my husband, my daughter who's still
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  in college, collectively A caregiver.
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  It's not just one person. So it's a team, Yeah.
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  And there's a team effort all the way.
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  And now you have support for that team so they can keep, you
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  know, your daughter in the fight.
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  Amazing. She's a warrior, isn't she?
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  She really is. And I wish, I mean for what you
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  do, I really wish that there was a time you could bring her on.
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  Because she was a. She was an Iron Man, a full Iron
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  Man triathlete, like brilliant, you know, NPA school going
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  places. Everybody loves her.
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  And then to see her life just changed so suddenly is
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  heartbreaking. But as much as they said she
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  would never be the same person, her bubbly personality and the
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  like, everybody that sees her is like her smile lights up the
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  room now. Even now with, you know, a star
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  on her face and her difficulties with her arm and difficulties
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  with walking, she's never become self-conscious about it.
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  She smiles, she laughs. Anytime you call and say, how
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  was your day? The first thing she says is
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  awesome. I'm like, was it really awesome?
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  Well, no, but then she'll kind of.
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  Here's my promise to you, Heidi. Well, let me get to February
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  2020. Sixth, we'll keep in touch,
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  please, and we will make that happen.
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  It would be an. Honor, she would be to to.
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  Come out, meet your daughter and let people understand the kind
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  of warrior she is. Because the reason I say that is
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  a lot of people get hurt and I've seen it happen where they
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  just lose the fight internally for whatever reason.
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  And then there's these people that stay in the fight and, and,
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  and fight to get back and, and fight for everything they have.
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  And I really align to that. It really resonates with me.
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  And I think it would be absolutely, it would be an honor
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  if you'd. Be the other thing I think that
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  I should have mentioned earlier about my case is that I think at
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  least from the people here, my daughter's may be the only one
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  that's actually still active duty.
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  Well, she's still active. Duty so a lot of caregivers
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  don't learn about all of this stuff until years later, you
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  know, so I'm fortunate because she hasn't been Med boarded yet
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  to be learning from other people.
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  Like make sure you get this and this and this before they Med
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  board. Her OK, we're last couple
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  questions. Yeah, why?
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  Why hasn't the Army Med board and the Marine Corps couldn't
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  wait to Med board me? They can't wait to Med board
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  anybody, right? But well, first of all, I know
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  the regulations just because I'm in Army medicine.
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  But you know, they've got to help her get better first and
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  and they aren't hesitating to do that.
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  I haven't had any problems with the Army.
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  So no one. Are they caregiver?
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  Nobody's rushing her because I think they all know she's coming
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  back. I I, I, I, I want to see that
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  come back story. Awesome, awesome Heidi, you
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  know, again, kind of like with Joseph where this this power of
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  love really manifests itself. We have a mother's love, a
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  soldiers love and this whole family team behind your daughter
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  and now you have Elizabeth Dole foundation as part of this.
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  Thank you for telling your story.
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  Thank. You awesome.
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  Thank you, Jennifer talking to us.
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  Thank you, Travis. OM Radio again, we're at the
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  Elizabeth Dole convening here in Washington, DC You've heard some
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  really impactful stories from Michael, Joseph and now Heidi.
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  support those who are giving care to our nation's heroes.
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