Latest / The Bold Lounge / Carla Mack: Bold-Hearted Leadership, Fostering Empathy in the Workplace

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Carla Mack: Bold-Hearted Leadership, Fostering Empathy in the Workplace · The Bold Lounge

• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Bold Lounge Podcast.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: My name is Lee Burgess and I will be your host.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: If you're anything like me, you love hearing inspiring stories of people who have gone on bold journeys and made a positive impact in the world.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: This podcast is all about those kinds of stories.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: Every week, we'll hear from someone who has taken a leap or embarked on an extraordinary journey.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: In addition to hearing their stories, we'll also learn about their bold growth mindset that they use to make things happen.
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: Whether they face challenges or douse along the way, they persisted and ultimately achieved their goals.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: These impactful stories will leave you feeling motivated and inspired to pursue your own bold journey.
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: I believe everyone has a bold story waiting to be freed.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: Tune in and get ready to be inspired.
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Bold Lounge.
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: Today I have Dr Karla Mack.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: She is the head global and US professional education and development.
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: Karla is an innovative and progressive business leader, eye doctor and wellness fanatic.
• 1:11
  Speaker 1: She has held global leadership roles in the development and bridging of scientific, professional and commercial strategies.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: She is passionate about advancing consumer insights and innovative treatment solutions into patient quality of life outcomes.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: First thing we're going to do is jump into being bold and understanding your definition of bold.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: What does bold look like and how is it defined in Karla's world?
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: Bold to me is just a relentless pursuit of being who you are, being your authentic self always.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: Then I would add to that taking the opportunities to get yourself out of your comfort zone.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: Okay, In your world.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: What does that look like?
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: When was the first time you did that?
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: or one big example, or an example that you can think of I don't know if this is the first time, but a big one in my life would be when I changed careers.
• 2:01
  Speaker 2: I was an academic or an academic clinician.
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: I was at the Ohio State University and was a professor as well as practicing clinician and educator of our optometry students, and decided you know I was a little bit of a square pegging around whole there, even though I loved what I did, but I knew it wasn't going to be a place I'd stay forever.
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: I ran all of our in-house clinics and I had a little bit of the business side from that.
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: I also did a ton of consulting with my industry counterpart and just really started to fall in love with that part of our business and what we do and knew I needed to learn a lot more about it.
• 2:43
  Speaker 2: But there came there just came a point.
• 2:44
  Speaker 2: One day I just said I'm going to leave here and I'm going to go take an industry job.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: I went and looked up executive MBA opportunities, signed up that night and just took it from there and just made a very quick decision that I was going to leave and then became very intentional about leaving and then very intentional about the type of role that I wanted to pursue when I was ready to jump in about, you know, a year and a half later.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: Okay, question about that.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: So was the decision actually itself quick, but was the leading up to it something that was more thoughtful and pragmatic?
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: I was definitely learning.
• 3:20
  Speaker 2: It was a learning journey right where you start to recognize I really love what they're doing over there and I became super curious, asked a ton of questions to general managers or presidents of companies or whoever I was engaged with and I really started building those relationships well before I needed them, well before I was going to be really looking for the right job.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: So whether it was super intentional at the time, I think I recognize later some of the steps I was taking that were super helpful for me and now I talk about these kind of things all the time that you do need to build those relationships before you need them, that you should be intentional with what you're trying to do.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: I think for me it was a bit more organic and how it came about the net but when you look back at it I really do recognize kind of what I was doing.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, some of those stepping stones of learnings and successes and failures became kind of what you actually use, what seemed quick, but you were able to catapult yourself from academia to industry, which usually is seen as not good, right, you're going to the other side, the dark side, you know.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: I myself, you and I.
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: You know we talked about pre recording and just coming from that background.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: But it's interesting, as I had been in academics for the majority of my career till 2020, and then started working on the pharma side and CRO side, just to kind of see the other side of the penny, so to speak.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: It's really interesting to have the site or academic perspective on us on a challenge or problem.
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: You see it in a whole new light.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: Exactly, yeah, some of that's just like, oh, okay, I see the vantage points way different here and then sense that also helps us problem solve or even maybe solutionize different.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: When you made that pivot, what were you concerned about?
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: Or were you all in and I'm this is where I know I'm meant to be so there really don't, I'm not really concerned about anything.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: I definitely felt it was where I was meant to be.
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: I will.
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: I will say that I just had a.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: I had a great passion for, for that side, and I just knew I needed to learn.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: One of the things that I love is to learn, and it's easier for me to learn by doing, and so just jumping into something is the better way for me to do that.
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: I think I had to quickly recognize what I knew and what I didn't know, and so, as you change roles like that, the entire environment is different.
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: The whole political nature of a company is different.
• 5:37
  Speaker 2: You know the types of roles and the types of stakeholders are very different.
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: And so, again, jumping into that kind of setting, it was a learning experience and I started doing the same types of things building relationships and those types of things right, like where people could help me.
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: They could help me before I needed, you know, the information that they were actually providing me.
• 5:59
  Speaker 2: So I really set out, trying to build great relationships inside.
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: I will tell you, I also was working remotely, so I was a single mom at the time and was unable to move.
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: So I've had several industry roles and this was 10 plus years before COVID.
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: Remote working wasn't cool.
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: No, it wasn't permitted.
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that was probably the one thing that I wasn't necessarily concerned with, but I'm sure those who hired me the companies that hired me it probably wasn't top of their list in terms of one of my benefits right Coming to the company.
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so that was probably one of the things that I really worked hard to overcome and not have it be an issue.
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: Right, you probably work 10 fold or 10X in some places in spaces in the world to actually show that this is I'm actually doing more, getting more done or more value in those situations and I think it has taken some time had to take a pandemic for people to realize that you don't have to be sitting at a desk in a building to do great work.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: Obviously you take care of patients, so that's not a remote type of situation when you're in the clinic, but there's opportunity for that.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: One of the things you said was you knew something needed to change, like there wasn't what I would call misalignment when you made that change.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: My framework believe, own learn and design, and you've talked a lot about the learning piece, which is so important.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: What beliefs were kind of instilled in you?
• 7:29
  Speaker 1: Or did you have at that point that you knew that you could one listen to that voice that says I think I can try something different, I can get curious, and it's okay to be curious.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: Did you have certain beliefs that helped you about yourself?
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: Or think that your belief muscle that maybe you had worked on over time?
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: And I'm not sure if it's things that I recognized at the time.
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: It was more of curating the relationships and then talking to those individuals who then would say to me you would be great in this environment.
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: Let us know when you're interested and we can talk about whether there's opportunities or not.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: I think I also had this big drive to have a global role.
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: I really wanted to once see the world.
• 8:12
  Speaker 2: I had some things where I thought if I don't get out of the situations I'm in, I won't have these opportunities to learn about my profession in other regions as well as get to travel to other regions.
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: There's a point in your life where, even for me, I hadn't gone very many places and I thought I just wanna be able to travel anywhere in the world, get off a plane and feel totally comfortable with what I'm doing.
• 8:38
  Speaker 2: And it almost seems silly now because I've done it a thousand times, but at the time when you haven't done something, you're jumping into something brand new and it seems scary and it seems different.
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: But I think I've just always had this tenacity to be able to take on a new challenge and just kind of ride through it work through it.
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: Like today is a big launch for me the Bold Leaders Collective, which is a membership and it's kind of the last three years of my work coming under one roof.
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: And this morning I woke up and I said to my husband I was like sometimes being bold is hard, Like being bold has been like super exciting for me for the last three years, primarily like I mean, there's ups and downs, nothing is perfect, but it was just a lot of go, go, go, go, go.
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: And then there's this like unknown, and today kind of felt like my first day three years ago when I was like I'm making this jump, I'm doing this thing and it's interesting, kind of like one of the things that can be scary in going back to your definition is the relentless pursuit of being who you truly are.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: And I don't know if it's gender specific, but obviously my lived experiences as a woman and I think sometimes through life we don't get to be who we truly are or show who we truly are.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: Would you agree with that and what has been your experience in the sense of evolution of that for you?
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: Oh, absolutely.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: I can go back 10 plus years and think about myself operating in a meeting or in a situation.
• 10:05
  Speaker 2: Often I was with a lot of males, and it wasn't necessarily male versus female, but I can remember thinking you need to hide a lot of things about yourself because they could be perceived as weaknesses.
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: So one I was a single mom.
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: I had a lot going on in the background.
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: It was my daughters and myself.
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: All the time there wasn't family around.
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: We had to do the things we needed to do and at one point I told them we have to be a team.
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: And to this day they're 27 and 24 and we're still a team.
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: We call ourselves the team.
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: We even invite others in to be part of our team.
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: But at the time I didn't talk to colleagues about my situation at work.
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: Sometimes you would be asked well, when are you moving?
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: When are you moving?
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: Why haven't you moved yet?
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: Right, and there were things that I just wouldn't reveal in a discussion when people are talking about things outside of work.
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: I just sort of sat back and listened but didn't engage with anything about myself Because I assumed it would be looked on as weakness, as, oh, she's got all these things happening.
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: She won't be capable of taking this on or that project on, or traveling here or there or being gone for a certain amount of time.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: So I really just started hiding a lot of things about myself.
• 11:29
  Speaker 2: I think over time you become confident in who you are and Over time I just realized there's nothing wrong with me and actually the things that I could prioritize and the things that I could manage Were my strengths.
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: You know, the fact that I could create relationships Well, there I was in that office or not.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: That there were people in the office who didn't even know I didn't live there Because of the way I crafted our relationship.
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: All of these things became things that I recognized as strengths.
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: And then you just start being who you are.
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: So I would talk about myself and some nice people like oh, I didn't even know you had kids, right and and then they were somewhat surprised by it.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: But also, you know they knew it didn't stop me from doing anything I needed to do, right though I really started then, you know, talking about it more and more.
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: I started dressing as myself even.
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: You know there was a point we all used to wear the suits and all that kind of stuff, and I can jazz it up with some cool tennis shoes or, you know, do something like that and I have certain signature styles that are myself.
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: Now that you know people recognize me as, and, again, that's just part of becoming you know who you are and maintaining that yeah, I don't think I ever heard in my 20s, 30s or 40s I never heard personal branding.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: I never heard about thinking about yourself, story telling me, these are all the cool things that we have.
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: Now that I think, as A 51 year old, like I'm just grabbing all of them and I'm like wanting to really embrace that.
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: But when I left Corporating kind of came into where I am now as an entrepreneur at 48.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: I think it was the most enlightening thing for me in year One is that I could be me, all me.
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: You know, wear a hat, that was my thing.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: You know where floral things are, kind of not always be in a suit, and healthcare You're always in a suit and I was always in heels and and not that those don't look good, but it isn't really where I would like go.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: First thing in my closet, so like being able to be yourself and like how good it felt and then to realize that you were accepted and that you were.
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: You were finding your people, who you didn't have to change, to be around them or to do, and still you were competent, you were educated and you didn't lose any of like the 25 years that you've been doing what you were doing.
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: So there's something very freeing in that, but coming out of where you were, where you weren't sharing it, and Feeling a sense of vulnerability which is bold, how did you do that?
• 13:47
  Speaker 1: What was your strategy?
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: Because your strategy, in a way, at first so you were protecting your family, you were protecting judgment, right of like, you're a single mom.
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: If we can't give her that project, those have things.
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: Like you said, what would be your advice or guidance for someone who's really wanting to be themselves, to show who they are, to show their style and you know, talk about things that happen in our lives how can they start doing that?
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: I think first, it is about understanding who you are and recognizing the things that you might be holding back and why.
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: I Do think you need to know where that's coming from and also, are you even in the right situation where we're being your true self is Allowable, or that you really put in in that place?
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah you need to know when to go right.
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: Sometimes you need to know that you are not in the right setting and Really need to leave that setting, especially if you just feel like you cannot do those things.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: So I you know.
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: Otherwise, if you don't think that's an issue, then you start doing it slowly, right, because it shows confidence, and you'll see how people react to you.
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: Right, I mean it whenever you can be who you are.
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: It's confidence, and people react well to confidence.
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: It's not arrogance, it's confidence.
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, right, it's that, I'm okay with me.
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: So I think one is important to know if you are in the right place or not, and that's sometimes hard for people to recognize and hard for them to acknowledge.
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: Right, that I might now have to make a big change because this just isn't the place for me.
• 15:14
  Speaker 2: I, especially when it's a work situation, right, or when you're with certain you know people you call friends and they're not really your friends, you know.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: So I always say you know, make sure you know when to say no and when to say yes to things.
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: Mm-hmm, I, I think one of the things you said there in the sense of becoming vulnerable, knowing when the right time to do that is and where and as you were talking, I drew the circle which was something that was very important when I started doing and being more me than anything else is that I realized that maybe the circle of people who I had around me or in the center needed to move to an outer loop of that circle, because I think you may find that the only thing you had in common was the challenge at work or the bad relationship with the ex or whatever it may be.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: Sometimes there's this commonality that only comes when things are tough and crappy and then when you become happy and gain clarity on who you are and get confidence and start acting like it.
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: Not everybody's happy about that, because it brings up stuff in them that they may not be doing.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: Did you ever have that experience?
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: Well, I'll tell you, the experience that I actually really do try to craft is getting to know people.
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: That I need to work all of my stakeholders in a more personal way, because you do find that when you're working with them and if things do get contentious, it's easier to work with people you like, and there's plenty of people that I work with where we don't have anything in common.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: But when we get to know each other and know things about each other, we can ask each other about those things.
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: Like I know something personal about you and I see you when I ask about it, right.
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: Or you know, like you talked about social media, you follow people on social media and someone had a vacation or this or that.
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: You can ask them about it and it makes a more personal and conversation and relationship.
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: And so I find that when I can craft that upfront with people, when anything gets contentious, when any of those this dynamic oh you know, are they trying to build a dynasty over there?
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: Are they just protecting their people?
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: You know why are they.
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: You know, arguing with us on this that you can easily deescalate some of those things just by your relationship with them.
• 17:28
  Speaker 2: You know you just pick up the phone and have a phone call and say hey, I just want to talk to you about that conversation yesterday.
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: I'm just really not understanding it, or you know?
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: Explain again to me your perspective.
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: But now you're talking as friends and people who like each other, who want to work with each other, versus in different departments or whatever that might be.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's sometimes just focusing on what the commonality of the goal is right, and you may not go with them on a ski trip or something, but you can work on that goal together and you know that you'll need to do it together.
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: At the end of the day, I always say people are people, like your coworkers are people.
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I say slow human, that's just so human.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like we're human, things are going to happen, we're going to, we're going to succeed and fail, and things may not go as planned.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: If you don't humanize them, you start taking everything personally.
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: Right, and I've learned to not take anything personally.
• 18:20
  Speaker 2: I mean I will recognize if I'm not performed well or not done something well.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: I mean I can own that easily.
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: But if someone else is treating me in a certain way, I don't take it personally.
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: I have to recognize it's coming from somewhere with them and just recognize that.
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that took me time and I think that just goes back to like stuff that's happened to me that I didn't talk about it.
• 18:42
  Speaker 1: You know, like in my family I had six, I lost my brother, who was almost 11.
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: And it was an accident and we didn't know, like it wasn't, not that anything, that that level is planned, but it was a charm.
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: It was traumatic and that's like something that like throughout my life, like little things added up, that my job was to keep everyone safe, make sure my mom knew everything I was doing, but still having a life, but making sure everything was good.
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: And so I like took on this mantle responsibility, like being responsible for everything and everyone my brothers, my sisters like I'm the most responsible one and I'm also the person that's going to do the next level.
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: But that can actually my strength.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: There can actually be a weakness if I use it too much or in the wrong way.
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: But as I was getting older, I was learning those things, but I never talked about my brother, my loss, or maybe like why I'm over responsible for things or why I take like things so seriously when it's someone's life, you know it.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: Just like I had an intensity and an edge that probably could have just been toned down a little, sawed down a little bit.
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: Do you think it takes time to get that to realize it's not personal, Because I bet I think I just was.
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: I didn't know me first and so therefore I didn't really realize even how to settle into being who I was and be okay with some of the stuff.
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: I definitely think it takes time for sure.
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know all of our experience shape who we are in the end and I really would gravitate towards those people who would become mentors for me and would learn everything I could about how they operated and when you get to know them again beyond sort of their you know, business capacities and understand who they really are.
• 20:17
  Speaker 2: You know they're amazing people and you can learn so much from them inside of work, from a business perspective, and outside of work, how they operate.
• 20:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 20:26
  Speaker 2: And when I would go through things in my life, they were often the ones I turned to, sort of these business mentors who could help me and be like, listen, you can't do all the things that you a husband and a nanny used to do, like you just simply can't.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: And if you're not taking care of yourself first, you can't take care of anyone else.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: Well, and those are some of the things I learned along the way, right?
• 20:46
  Speaker 2: So I really do take care of myself and, like you talked about sort of this protecting everyone else.
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: If I'm not protecting myself, I can't protect anyone else, right?
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: And so there there are sort of these things I do now that are very much me focused, so that I can do some of those other things that are everyone else focused.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it comes with time, for sure, but I do think it's again starting to recognize who those great people are in your lives and how to get you know, learn as much from them as you really can.
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and except you win your I'll just use my word prickly so I think you know doing some of the things that you know.
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: When you shared your your bio with me, what you put as recent life discoveries, I really thought it was one of the coolest ways to get to know you and you even shared kind of where you focus your energy and you have a pie chart on it and you know, one of the things that you have is cool girl mom, and your second one is global and US leadership teams at Alcon and so, like those are your top two where you put your energy right.
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: So, as you're thinking about where your energy goes, some of those things also are ways for you to learn more about yourself, right?
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: If you think about your energy pie, which we talk about a lot in the corporate world, you know there are different pieces and parts of you that not everyone's going to know.
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: You're a cat lover, you know there's a time and place for wearing the cat sweater or you know whatever it may be, you'll find your people and the people that you have, those relationships and you build those relationships up in the world we're in right now, like with remote working and digital and all the things that we can do without leaving our house.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: What are some things that you do to build relationships when you're not in the office day to day with someone?
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: I mean during COVID, I think, when we were remote, I have to say everyone was so much more relaxed, right?
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: I mean, to me that was one of the best parts of this.
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: You know, you have a super high executive come on a zoom call, you know, and a hooded sweatshirt.
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: It might have been like yellow and look terrible on them and they didn't care, it was relaxed.
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: It just evenized everybody.
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: Versus the way you might sit around a room, the who sat where, and that kind of thing.
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: It really, to me, equalized everyone, and so I think there are a lot of benefits to that or sort of this hybrid type situations.
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: But we're not in the office.
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: I will tell you, my team and I we're communicating all the time.
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: We use an app where we can talk back and forth and throughout the evening we are talking back and forth so we listen to each other's messages and we can actually stop it and even respond right there, and it allows us to stay in communication all the time.
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: And I'll tell them on the weekend, you know, have have an amazing weekend and you know I love you guys, right, like you know, it's just one of these things where I'm like I do and I love them.
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: They're great, they're amazing people and you know we sometimes get together on the weekends we might go for walks and things like that, but it's really is just connecting in any way you can staying connected.
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: We talk about our lives and things that are impacting us, and one of the things I do with my team that has really been helpful is, before any meeting, they have to give me one word about how they feel right now.
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: It has to be a feeling word, just one word.
• 24:05
  Speaker 2: They don't have to talk about it and in fact I don't want them to talk about it why they feel a certain way, but it's a feeling word and then you're not going to get beyond where kind of that lowest person is in the room with your meeting and what you're trying to accomplish that day, and so it really sets the tone to know where everyone sits.
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: You know where are they sitting in their head right now, today, and then later I can ask them about it.
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: You know it's not something we're going to discuss in the in the middle of our, you know, team meeting, but it really allows me to know where they are, because if they come in, you know agitated or you know anxious or whatever, right overworked from things they've got going on, or they just came from a meeting where someone really upset them.
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: You know, I come in and I'm all pumped up about something we're going to do.
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: It's not going to work, they're not there, yeah, no.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: So again it's sort of really just.
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: Again the relationship piece is huge for us.
• 24:59
  Speaker 1: And understanding, just like in life, everyone's kind of entering into wherever the situation is or where the conversation is or where the moment is, with their journey.
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: Before that moment, right, and we don't know what that was, we don't, you know.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: Like you said, no one knew you were a single mom, no one knows that my brother passed.
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: No, you know like, and everyone has a story, everyone has moments in their life that you don't know.
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: And I think that's where being human and being empathetic and understanding that everyone's not coming into the room and I mean using your one word example, I think us knowing that too, as we walk around and we engage and the things that we do, it's important to realize sometimes we have to meet people where we are, regardless of what our goals are for that meeting.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: For example, like, okay, I realize I'm going to, maybe we aren't going to get to level six, but let's work on getting the level three during this meeting, and then I'm going to follow back up with Joe, who seems to be having a rough day and I want to learn more.
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: And then that carrying empathetic leader as well comes out in your story that you're sharing.
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: And I think that's important to that.
• 26:03
  Speaker 2: I think it's learning from what people tell you as well.
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: There's times when I would have a meeting with somebody whether it was when in academia and it was with a student or you know, even in the workplace, and someone would say you know you're.
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: I was nervous to come in here and talk.
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: Right then I'm putting out some weird vibes right, like you talked about these hard edges, yeah, and while that might seem, you know, powerful or confident or whatever it is, it doesn't allow people to engage with you way that they need to.
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: So whatever you're trying to accomplish, you're not going to accomplish very fast.
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, right, because people are fearful.
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: And I can remember having a few of these conversations with people and then they would, as they were conversing, they're like you're really nice and fun and like funny or you know whatever, and I thought you know there's a lot to warm, projecting some warmth.
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: You know making people feel comfortable is really good.
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: Right, you're going to move things about a lot quicker and I think that's part of our issue.
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: Sometimes, where these go, get them kind of people were always a few steps ahead trying to pull people along.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: But again, if you don't meet them where they are and really be kind to people, don't some parents about what in?
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: doubt, be kind.
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think right, yeah, I think the other thing I learned is I thought I could teach or share or direct or give a resource to or to have someone go from point A to point B.
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: And I think somewhere in my late 30s, early 40s I realized sometimes people can't it's not that they don't want to, it's not that they're not trying, they just can't.
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: And you have to really again meet them where they are, understand kind of what their gifts are, understand where things are fit and work through it in a kind way.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: And I think that was a learning for me to have like patience and, you know, realization of it.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: I can't, I can't resource this away, I can't guide it away, I can't performance improve this way.
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: It's just not going to fix it.
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: Being able to have those conversations in a kind way, in a way that's growth-evoking but hard to have still, I think that's something too that we learn as leaders as we grow up.
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: I'll just use my word grow up, as I did.
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's important to take the cues that other people are giving you, right Often they're telling you Right, it's like you can put it aside or you can take that as real feedback and actually do something with it.
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I definitely got the.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: You're intimidating and then like, oh wow, you're so fun and nice.
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: I think sometimes for me in an academic world, like I felt like I actually had to seem tougher, but that's kind of how we at least I thought I had to be, so then it really wasn't me being me honestly, you know.
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: So like when you think about your life discoveries and you have some cool ones and you have Wim Hof breathing and ice bathing enthusiasts can you tell me a little bit about one, what this is?
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: I know ice bathing but I would love to hear it.
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: I have bought one but I have never used it and I'm kind of scared.
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: So I'm intrigued about Wim Hof breathing and ice bathing enthusiasts.
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so I don't have the bathtub kind of thing myself, but I prefer to be in, like one of the places I go is Boulder Creek, so in Boulder, colorado, you know, in December or January when there's snow and it's about 10 degrees outside, yeah, I have a friend there who again is a real good friend and mentor of mine, who introduces me to these crazy things that as you do them they don't become crazy anymore, they're less scary, right?
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, and the idea is you do some breathing to prepare your body before you get in, and then you get in and you know you can stay for a short period of time at first, just to get your body acclimated, you know, and up to a certain number of minutes or whatnot, depending on how cold that is that you're getting into.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: If it's truly full of ice, right, you don't want to stay for too long, but you find that, using your mind to control your breathing, you don't feel cold and you can, if you're shivering, you can stop yourself from shivering, and this all becomes super powerful.
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: So, while it has great effects on your body, like you've talked about, you know, it really is sort of a powerful moment to be able to do something like that we're.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: Usually we just shy away from something.
• 30:18
  Speaker 2: Right, you know shower's cold, you're going to run out of it.
• 30:21
  Speaker 2: Right, you don't want to stay in there.
• 30:22
  Speaker 2: But that's a great way to start.
• 30:24
  Speaker 2: This, too, is using the shower.
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: You have a warm shower and they take the last 30 seconds and put it on cold.
• 30:29
  Speaker 2: It just don't move and have yourself breathe through it.
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: Right, a lot of times it's just taking the first step to do something versus doing nothing.
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you make it sound so easy, karla, like taking the first step.
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: Is this, when I work with clients, like that's one of the things, that's like you have to take the first step.
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: I can't do it for you.
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: It's right there, right, and so, like I love that this is something as simple as breathing helps you understand that you're in control.
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: Is that what it comes down to?
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: You're in control of your body, of your mind, of what you think about the situation, like when you're in it.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: I'm just curious.
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: I mean, you have to realize physically you're in something very, very cold, but where do you go to focus your thought?
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: Do you think about one thing?
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: Do you think about a myriad of things?
• 31:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I've done it alone and I've done it with people, and both are different, right?
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: I think when you're doing it with other people, you're sort of there for each other, right?
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: You want everyone else to stay calm, so you're like I'm going to be super calm so that I can help impact them and influence them to be calm and show them that they can do this, particularly when they haven't done it before.
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: And then when you're by yourself, it is more of a just being there with your own thoughts, right.
• 31:40
  Speaker 2: As those things creep in like oh, this is cold, or I can't feel my toes, you know, just moving the thought to something else, that it's not that long.
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: You're almost out of here, right?
• 31:51
  Speaker 2: Sometimes I'll just play music and listen to the music and it takes my mind off of what I'm actually doing.
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so what would be an analogy from being in an ice bath, that kind of being in the corporate setting and kind of doing some of the things that you have to do?
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: I think it relates to anything where there's some project that you don't really want to do or you think you could fail at just take it on right.
• 32:11
  Speaker 2: A lot of this stuff that we shy away from is because we think we might fail.
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: Not that we will fail, and a lot of times failure is good.
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: You're gonna learn something really great about you know yourself and how you handle that and how you pick yourself up.
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: I know that I will just verbalize things.
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: Now.
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: If I see something and I kind of think I don't really want to do that, or I have some big project I have to do and I don't want to get started, I verbalize it, and I verbalize it in front of important people.
• 32:38
  Speaker 2: I just bake myself, say it and then I can't go back on it Like I have to start it then and I have to do it.
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: Well, Right, and I have to get moving at least, and once you get moving you can carry it forward.
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: But it's that first step.
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: So a lot of times my first step is just verbalizing.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: So it doesn't have to be loud, it doesn't have to be something big.
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: It can be a quiet step, and what I mean by that is you're verbalizing it, but you didn't, like you know, hike the Himalayas or jump in the ice bath on the first day.
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: You're taking a cold shower for 15 seconds or 30 seconds.
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: It helps you kind of shake off whatever has held you in that spot.
• 33:13
  Speaker 2: But I'll say something positive, like we got this and it's gonna be great, we got it.
• 33:17
  Speaker 2: Like my team's got it.
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: We're gonna be great right?
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not always negative, for sure.
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah Well, thank you so much for being on the Bold Lounge.
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: All the information about Carla how to reach out to her and connect with her is in the episode notes.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: Thank you for sharing your bold journey, thank you.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: Thank you for listening to the Bold Lounge podcast.
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: Through the continuum of bold stories vulnerability to taking a leap you will meet more extraordinary people making a positive impact for others through their unique and important story.
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: By highlighting these stories, we hope to inspire others and share the journey of those with a bold mindset.
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: We hope you've enjoyed this podcast and look forward to sharing the next bold journey with you.