Latest / Drawn of History / Jim Norton _ This Past Weekend w_ Theo Von _608(M4A_128K)

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Jim Norton _ This Past Weekend w_ Theo Von _608(M4A_128K) · Drawn of History

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Today's guest is his first time on the podcast. He's
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: a legendary stand-up comedian and host. He helped give me
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: my start in getting on the airwaves. He has a
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: new special on YouTube called Unconceivable and his own podcast
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: called Jim Norton Can't Save You. Today's guest is the
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: one of one, Mr.
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: Jim Norton. Welcome to the show. Well, I was just
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: telling you, we can get started. You want to? Yeah. Yeah.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: I was just telling you that I feel like, um,
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: all right. Just let me know if I'm off Michael.
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: I'm obsessed with that too. With sound. Like when I'm
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: interviewing somebody, if they're like, they're off mic, I'm like,
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: you know, Oh, I feel horrible.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: The other day I did somebody's podcast and I chewed
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: gum the whole time.
• 1:03
  Speaker 2: We've had that. Yeah, it happens. But the fact that
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: I did, it's like I do it for a living.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: How did I do that? Every day it still haunts
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: me a little bit. That you chewed the gum? Yeah,
• 1:13
  Speaker 2: just feel.
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  Speaker 1: Because I'm like, you know, they came and we all
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: put our time in, you know, just to be there
• 1:18
  Speaker 1: and do it. And I freaking just like, you know,
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: sometimes you show up and you just do the most
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Bush League thing.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: I'd like to ask them, did you notice it while
• 1:27
  Speaker 2: it was happening and did you want to say something?
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: Because we had Marlon one time and he was eating
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: oatmeal or something the whole time or chewing something. And
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: the fans were furious and were like, why didn't we
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: just say something when he was eating? Sometimes when you're hosted,
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: you don't tell the person, you're chewing gum, stop chewing gum. Yeah,
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: he should feel embarrassed. You feel embarrassed. Yeah. But he
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: still should have told you.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, I've had instances where somebody's mouth will be
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: very dry.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. You know what I'm talking about? Yes, that
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: fucking sticky fruit roll-up sound, yeah.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: And you know, all you can think of is the
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: listeners being.
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: Like, this dry motherfucker. This fucking pasty-mouthed idiot, yeah.
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: This fire survivor fucking showing up. And it's so true.
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: But you can't sit over there and like baby bird
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: somebody some water, bud.
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: Well, you want to say to them, like, you want
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: some water? And then they're like, no. It's like when
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: someone's breath stinks. You're like, you want a piece of gum?
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: And they're like, no, I'm good. And you're like, you're
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: not good. So, you know, we're trying to be courteous. Yeah,
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: you want me to pressure wash your face for a second? Like,
• 2:25
  Speaker 2: that's another thing you could offer them? But you see, like,
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: how you just said that. Now I'm making sure. I'm
• 2:29
  Speaker 2: opening my water. People have to be self-aware too. Like
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: anybody who's doing something, if your mouth is pasty and
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: dry and sticky and sounds like shit, you should be
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: aware of it. You have ears. Yeah.
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: And then that you just realize, oh, that person is offline.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: They are just not, they don't know what's going in.
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: Or sometimes it'll be a woman's lipstick is a little
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: thick and it kind of just.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: A little crack.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: A little pop.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: That stuff drives me crazy. I pick up on it.
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: And I sniffle a lot. I'm a noisy, uncomfortable-to-be-around person.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: I get it. So I have no right to tell
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: other people. But I'm always clearing my throat. It's really
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: fucking horrible.
• 3:06
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: Well, as we get older, too, it's just like, you're
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: just hoping that every now and then you're a little
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: bit of the semblance of what you once were.
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Oh, no, I've given up on that. I've thrown
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: in the towel. I will never again be what I
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: once was. And I was only mediocre to begin with.
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: So I went from mediocre to kind of shitty. But
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: it's funny. I'm so self-conscious about how I look. And
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: my wife is like, oh, you look fine. And I
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: got a text from Gutfeld the other night, a random text.
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: He's like, hey, man, I saw you on that Kill
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: Tony thing. That's a good look for you. That's a
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: good weight for you. So people are telling me I
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: look okay, but I'm like, I don't feel okay. I
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: feel fucking fat and just mushy and my neck is fat.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: I just dropped 20 pounds. Oh, you want to drop? Well,
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: it's so funny because I saw you last night.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: I was like, man, Jimmy, you kind of look, I
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: feel like you have looked better as you've gotten older,
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: kind of, as you've grown more into an adult.
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: Thank you. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I look
• 3:59
  Speaker 2: back on my old pictures. I'm not impressed with them either.
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: So I can't go like, ah, I want to get
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: back to those days. It's like, rush back to what? Yeah.
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean?
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: Do you ever feel like, cause some of us comedians
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: are so uncomfortable. Um, and I was just, I was watching,
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: you have a, you have a new special that's on YouTube, unconceivable, right?
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: And it's so funny cause I've thought of things being
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: inconceivable before, but to go as far to be like unconceivable,
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: like I should never even have been like contemplated.
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  Speaker 2: Fuck. That's intense, dude.
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: Because I think at the depth of some comedians and
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: artists and not, not trying to sound like like we're special,
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: but we're fucked up. There's something a little wrong with
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: a lot of people in the world. And we choose
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: to try to put it out there. Sometimes all artists do,
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: even strippers, I think they do that in their way.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: But like, there's something like, God, I should never even
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: have been here.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: Well, the reason I named it, honestly, people thought I
• 4:55
  Speaker 2: fucked up and spelled it wrong. But I didn't. It's
• 4:58
  Speaker 2: unconceivable on purpose. It's an old way of saying it.
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: It's actually technically correct in the English language. But it
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: was also like a nod to my wife, who is,
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: you know, cannot conceive, obviously. Oh, I haven't gotten that
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: far through it. Oh, okay, yeah. It was part of
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: the— About 20 minutes in. Oh, okay, yeah, yeah. I
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: talk about her. It was part of it's about her
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: being not able to conceive. That was kind of why
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  Speaker 2: I called it unconceivable.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: Oh, I see what you're saying. I thought— I guess I
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: just took that somewhere in it. Just because you've always
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: kind of operated on the fringes of like depravity or
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: what's okay in the world sort of in your own space.
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: Is that okay to say that? Oh, yeah. It's 100% accurate.
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: But if it was about me and my existence, I
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: would have called it should have been a load and
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: a sock. That's what I would have named it. Yeah,
• 5:42
  Speaker 2: it should have been a practice round.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I should have been like, yeah, like I should
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: not have been in the gun.
• 5:49
  Speaker 2: No, no, no. My father should have wiped me out
• 5:50
  Speaker 2: of his belly button with a Dunkin' Donuts napkin. Shemokin'.
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: Remember the Dunkin' Donuts? Dude, you turned me on to that. Yeah, the... Oh,
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: the iced coffee, cold coffee. Cold, what do they call
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: cold coffee? Yeah, her name is Edna Faust.
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: And I remember we loved them so, the joy... We
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: got from them. You gave me that joy, dude. And
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  Speaker 2: I've showed that over the years. We've had people sitting
• 6:15
  Speaker 2: here and I'm like, you got to see this. Because
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: the thing that's amazing about Edna is was her deductive
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  Speaker 2: reasoning was that she knew that like ice coffee, cold coffee.
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: Like she's just watching her go through the clues as
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: to what to call it is why I love her
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  Speaker 2: so much.
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Drop it real quick because I also want to
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: tell you Dutch came to one of my shows one time.
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: You met Dutch? I met him. Dutch is Smith. What's
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: his last name?
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: Dutch.
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  Speaker 2: What did he do? Smith? There you go.
• 6:44
  Speaker 5: A coffee shop in Shemokin is closed following an arson
• 6:48
  Speaker 5: over the weekend.
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  Speaker 2: It's definitely going to miss it, no doubt about it.
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  Speaker 5: A teenager is charged with starting the fire inside the
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  Speaker 5: restaurant on Saturday night. Shemokin Police Officer Ray Psycho says no.
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  Speaker 2: One was hurt, but the place has extensive damage.
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  Speaker 5: Psycho says the fire was started inside the women's bathroom.
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  Speaker 5: The toilet paper dispenser was lit on fire, and within
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  Speaker 5: about a minute, the entire place was filled up with smoke.
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  Speaker 2: The mother did explain that she's recently been put on
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: new medication.
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: But as far as for what reason, we're unsure right now.
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  Speaker 5: The 13-year-old who admitted to setting the fire is currently
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  Speaker 5: at a juvenile detention center. Many people who live in
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  Speaker 5: Shemokin are upset that Dunkin' Donuts is closed.
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  Speaker 4: Now I have to rely on myself to go to
• 7:31
  Speaker 4: maybe a Turkey Hill or something where I don't like
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  Speaker 4: their donuts. I'd rather the donuts at Dunkin' Donuts. And
• 7:37
  Speaker 4: I'm kind of dealing with it, but... I really miss
• 7:40
  Speaker 4: Dunkin' Donuts.
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  Speaker 2: I go there every day. I get a chicken bacon croissant.
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: I get some coffee, Powerade if I'm dehydrated.
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  Speaker 3: I sit there all the time. If I have any
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: legal work that I need to do, I go there.
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: I meet with my attorneys there. I'm going to miss
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: that place if it don't open up.
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: A lot of my friends go in.
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: There, get the cold coffee.
• 8:01
  Speaker 4: Ice coffee, I guess it's called.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: Oh, there she goes. She figures it out. She knows.
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: Edna Faust's Unsolved Mysteries. She gets to it. And Dutch
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: Smith doing his legal work. I mean, there really is.
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: And by the way, I hate to bum the podcast
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: vibe out, but the first woman at Turkey Hill Donuts,
• 8:19
  Speaker 2: she passed away. I'm almost positive we did a deep
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: dive on her. And I do think that, unfortunately, she
• 8:25
  Speaker 2: is no longer with us. God, she seemed like the
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: most healthy of the three of them, I thought. She did, too.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: She was definitely the one I was, if I had
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: to be attracted to one of the three, it would
• 8:33
  Speaker 2: have been, Faust was a close second. Dude, you could
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: play Faust in like a biopic one day.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: I would love to. Brian Dennehy right now has her,
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: but I think. Oh, but Dutch Smith came out to
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: a show, dude. He's doing great now. So, but that
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: was amazing, bro. But yeah, you put me onto this
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: and I, and I've like shared it with so many
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: people over the years.
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: So thank you, dude. It was such a bizarre. I
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: remember it was on with myself and I was on, uh,
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: Opie and Jim. And I think that was the show. And, uh, yeah,
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: we would play all these weird clips and once in
• 9:03
  Speaker 2: a while you find one, it's like, That's a gem. Yeah.
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: That's a gem. But I never had any follow-up about
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: Edna Faust. I'm dying to know how she is because
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: I think she's the best. Yeah, let's put it. We'll
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: put it out on all call.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: Hopefully somebody can send something in, man, and we'll see
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: if we can get a little follow-up. The Faust over
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: there outside of Turkey Hill and Dunkin' Donuts and Shemokin'..
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: They've rebuilt it, by the way. Oh, they have? I have.
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: We did follow-up. They have rebuilt the Dunkin' Donuts, and
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: it's a big thing in Shemokin'. I was going to
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: stop in there going to a gig one time. But
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: I'm like, no, I can't. I just, I cared while
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: I was on the air and as soon as I
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: was in the car, I was like, fuck Shamokin. I'm
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: not stopping.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: It is funny how you make little plans like, oh,
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: I gotta be, and then things come along and you're like, nah,
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: let's just keep hitting those.
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: Stay on the road. Stay on the road. It was
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: fun in theory. It was fun to think about and
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: to talk about, but now that I'm actually going to
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: be 25 minutes out of my way that way and
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: then 25 minutes out of my way that I'm not
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: doing it.
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: So unconceivable was your wife. Cause your wife can't conceive.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: You're married now.
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yes. Yeah.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: And do you feel like you kind of gate? Like,
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: what was it like? Cause you like, that was your
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: first marriage. Yeah.
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: Hopefully my first and hopefully my only, yeah. I only
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: did it because When she came into the, she was
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: having a hard time, so we did a 90-day fiance
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: visa to get her in. So we got married 90
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: days after she came in. Otherwise, I would have just dated.
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: But it's okay. You fight different when you're married because
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: you can't just go, fuck you, get out. You're there.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: So you got to resolve it faster. You have to
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: go back to your corner kind of. Got to go
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: back to your corner kind of. I used to have
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: three and four... Like I would fight with girlfriends and
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: then they would leave. And then for three or four days,
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: I would just have hookers come over. Like it really
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: was an ugly scene. And this is a lot, a
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: lot easier, a lot cleaner. Yeah.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: Does this feel easier? Kind of like, does it feel
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: like you kind of escape? Cause I mean, I got
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: like a lot of, I think commitment issues and stuff
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: like that. And I just feel like, man, at some
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: point I got to escape, like not use marriage as
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: an escape, but I would love to not be kind
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: of trapped just in this, stupid circle that I get
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: in sometimes.
• 10:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: It's like, it's almost like it's a, it's a lonely
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: spiral too. Like I forget, like whenever I get pissed
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: at her, I'm like, yeah, but I was really depressed
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: when I was single. Like I wasn't happy when I
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: was single. I was miserable. I hated being alive. So
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: if I fight with her and I'm like, yeah, this
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: kind of sucks. I'm like, yeah, but it's not, it's me.
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: I'm the problem. Cause if I'm single, I'm even worse
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: than I am right now. So no, I don't want to,
• 11:20
  Speaker 2: I like being married. I just, sometimes when you think
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: I'm married, you're like, oh, fucking life is over. But
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: I'd prefer this.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 11:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: At least you have someone to be there with you
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: in your life. You're like, and you kind of have
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: a donkey to pin the tail and you're like fucking.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah. The wife.
• 11:34
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: Fuck her. What is she?
• 11:35
  Speaker 4: What?
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah. If there's things are wrong, my fucking wife. It's
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: also a good excuse though. Like, ah, nah, my wife's
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: not feeling well. I got to go home and see
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: my wife. Like there's little built in things that are
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: kind of advantages that I didn't see. Um, And I'm
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: glad I did it because if I didn't do it,
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: I would still be running in the same. That's why
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: I fattened up because I literally am not doing the
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: same things I used to do on the road to
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: get like those little mini highs you get. You know,
• 11:59
  Speaker 2: now I'm just in the hotel room alone. And what
• 12:02
  Speaker 2: do you do? You order food at two o'clock in
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: the morning instead of having somebody come over. Yeah. It's
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: not as fun. So you're, and your wife is, uh,
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: your wife is trans. Yes. Trans. Transgender.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 12:13
  Speaker 2: Transgender. Yes.
• 12:14
  Speaker 5: Okay.
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: Okay. And so what does transgender mean exactly? Because people
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: use the term all the time, and sorry to go
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: to such rudimentary stuff, but it means a man and
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: a woman?
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like born in a male body. And they can't
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: say exactly medically what makes a person transgender. That's why
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: there's so much arguing about it. It's up to speculation.
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: Some people are like, ah, you're just a crazy fucking
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: guy in a dress, and other people are like, no,
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: you're born this way, but they can't tell you medically
• 12:38
  Speaker 2: exactly what it is in the brain. But yeah, she
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: definitely was born in a male body. But if you
• 12:44
  Speaker 2: talk to her for five minutes, that's a woman's brain.
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: But I would lose the argument in court. I don't
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: have the argument in court. She definitely does not have
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: a vagina. No, she's not at all. Okay. Hey, you look, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: It's not even a penis. It's a cock. Oh, yeah. Definitely. Wow.
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: Were you able to discern over time why you liked
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: something so unique, kind of? Like, is that a way
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: to ask it?
• 13:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you can ask whatever you want. I mean,
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: I don't know. Like, it's one of those things where
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: when it comes to sexuality and attraction, what makes a
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: person like what they like? I don't have the answer
• 13:23
  Speaker 2: to that. It's a pull. It's like you don't choose
• 13:27
  Speaker 2: what direction you're going to get pulled in sometimes. For me,
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: attraction has never been like, I'm going to go over
• 13:33
  Speaker 2: there and like that. It's going to be something hits
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: me and I kind of like lock into it. And
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: I feel it and it pulls me that way. You
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: know what I mean? But I, in a way, yeah,
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: kind of, yes, yes. But the living art, one that
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: you can really just, you know, slap against your face. Yeah.
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: Art you can sit on. Dang. Do you ever go places?
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: Now, do you have, say if you are dating someone
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: who's trans, do they ask questions like, why do you
• 14:04
  Speaker 1: prefer this? Or is that like something you kind of
• 14:07
  Speaker 1: have to make clear to them a certain way so
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: that they feel okay?
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: Is that a, I think it's like any other relationship.
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: It's like the, in bed sexually, like fucking or not
• 14:15
  Speaker 2: fucking or that type of stuff.
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: No, I think even just like on a person to
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: person basis, like, Do I seem like a trophy to
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: you or do I seem like something like a novelty
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: or like a nice piece of jewelry to like, you know,
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: this artistic collection piece or do I, do you really
• 14:28
  Speaker 1: love me because of who I am?
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: Yes. And I think that any, any person, any person
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: has to like, you know, as a guy with money,
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: you have to wonder, Hey, does this woman like me
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: because of who I am or because I have money?
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: And with her, she could be like, is it because
• 14:40
  Speaker 2: I'm transgender that he wants a transgender? I think that
• 14:43
  Speaker 2: with any person, you kind of like, you just, you
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: know what somebody's motives are after a while. And if
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: you're with someone as a trophy, like if I'm just like, hey,
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: I mean, we've been on and off for like, I mean,
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: back together since 2019. So six years and we were
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: a year and a half before then. So by this point,
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: after seven or eight years, you know what a person is.
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: Like I was like, well, does she like me? Does
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: she like because I have money? But there's a lot
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: of guys that have money and there's a lot of
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: trans people. So if that's all we want, then we
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: could easily go out and find somebody else who fit
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: that criteria.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. She's beautiful. Thank you.
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: And you see you guys live together, huh? We lived together.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: I put her up. Immigration was very slow. It was
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: just one of those things where she had something she
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: had to get fixed. And we did it right. But
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: it's just, you know, it's a slow process. So while
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: she was waiting, I moved her to Montreal and I
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: would drive up and see her. And I wound up
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: spending the whole pandemic there. I drove up. They're going
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: to close the Canadian border. So I drove up one
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: day after the radio show and I just stayed for
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: 15 months. I was out of the U.S. for 15 months.
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: It was crazy. Doing the radio show from there. just
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: live is my first time living with anyone. And it
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: was in the pandemic in a one bedroom in Montreal.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: Oh my God. And I'm like, if we can do this,
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: I can make this work. Like if we can, cause
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: Canada was even panicky more than the U S about COVID,
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: you know, eight o'clock curfew. Uh, you know, they were
• 16:06
  Speaker 2: really crazy up there about it. So I'm like, if
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: we can make it through this, we can be okay,
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: you know, in New York and having a life together.
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: So was that kind of a moment for you where like, okay,
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: this is a big thing that I was able to do.
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: And that gave you the, cause like sometimes I'm a question, like,
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: how do I get to those next places? I think
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: when you're kind of like, you know, I'm not forties,
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: I'm single. So it's like. you're like, will I ever
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: get there? You know, what's really gonna change? Was that
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: like a thing that really made it kind of different
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: for you?
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that made it like, okay, this is a real thing.
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: Like I had never done that with anybody in the States,
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: but we were forced to. Because if I came back
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: to the States once, the border was closed, I would
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: not have been allowed back into Canada. So I had
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: to choose between like being in New York or my
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: life with her, like leaving her alone up there for,
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: we didn't know for how long. So it was kind
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: of like a loaded gun to your head, like you're
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: here or it's over. And doing that, I was just
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: so grateful to be with her and so like grateful
• 17:01
  Speaker 2: to actually have a chance. It was like a test run.
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: You got to do a test run and see like,
• 17:05
  Speaker 2: do I want to be with this person? And we
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: got along like, way better than I would have thought.
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: And so life here is fairly easy compared to that. Wow.
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: But easy in a married way. Like everything people told
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: me about marriage is true.
• 17:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It sucks. I mean, you know, you got to
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: answer to somebody. Somebody's in your space. Somebody doesn't like
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: the shit I hang on the walls. Like I don't
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: like answering to a person. Nobody does.
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: No. Well, I think it's one of the reasons, especially
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: like with comedy, you just work for yourself. It's just
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: you up there. There's nobody that's telling you. The crowd
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: tells you it's fine. I'll accept it from a group.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: I'm not taking it from one person. Yeah.
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: You know, it's like it's a total space of complete control.
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: And it's very like I like the fact, too, that
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: like when you're with someone, can we talk about our
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: lives on stage? So like I've been with women who
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: got so angry at me for the things I said
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: about our personal life. And she she doesn't care at all,
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: which I love. She loves the stuff I talk about,
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: like our personal life, even matter how, how embarrassing it
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: is or how personal it is or how intimate she
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: doesn't care. She's like, great, go ahead, do whatever you
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: want to do. She doesn't give a fuck. Yeah.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: I guess if you're cuddling up at night, I mean,
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: both there's people have wieners in the bed. Yeah. Yeah.
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: I mean, I have a wiener. She's like, you know, yeah,
• 18:16
  Speaker 2: you don't, you don't spend a hundred grand on immigration
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: lawyers for a dick smaller than yours. Yeah. Oh, damn,
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: that's a good point. Oh, yeah. Tara Fett, Trump, huh?
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: I'd love to see him. Wow. Yeah, yeah, she'll like that.
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: A lot of people get mad. Why does he talk
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: about her, Jenna? Well, shut up.
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: Do you notice other men, like if you're around other guys,
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: do you think there's like a lot of curious guys
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: who are into that universe that are afraid to talk
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: about it?
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they ask questions. I never mind, though. Like, I'm not, again,
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: and that's why I joke about her the way I do,
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: because she's unbendable with that. She doesn't care. And I
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: couldn't have married a fragile personality. No, not you.
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: No, you've always been very your own way and like
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: aggressively your own way, but also in a kind of
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: I'm okay with where I'm at.
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: You've never been in this apologetic way about yourself.
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: No, and you can't like, you know, I want you
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: want people to be respectful to your partner when you
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: introduce them and everybody's been nice and you don't want
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: people to be dicks, but I don't care what people think.
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: You can't live your life and care what other people think.
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: think I have fun with her. She's my favorite person.
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: Like she's the person I should have married. Like, uh,
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: and do I get guys that are kind of curious? Yes. Um,
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: and I get a tremendous amount of messages from people
• 19:30
  Speaker 2: who are like, Hey man, I'm really glad you talked
• 19:31
  Speaker 2: about that because I, and I don't talk about it
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: in some serious, like nobody wants to be scolded. Nobody
• 19:38
  Speaker 2: wants to be fucking lectured. Just be with whoever you like. Like,
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: you know what I mean? And if you're worried about
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: what other people think and you live your life for
• 19:44
  Speaker 2: other people, you're a weak motherfucker. And then just deal
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: with that fact about yourself.
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I've had moments in my life where I like
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: didn't have certain girlfriends, I think, cause I thought some
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: of my friends wouldn't be impressed with them.
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: Maybe we've all been there.
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah. You know, it just bones down when I look
• 19:58
  Speaker 1: back at it at certain moments and not like in
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: a self-pity type of way. Like I'm like, but when
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: I look back, I'm like, man, I wish I'd, cause
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: in some ways I am my own person, but in
• 20:06
  Speaker 1: ways like that, I think I I don't know, I
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: had some tough times with it, kind of.
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: But growing up, I think it's kind of common, too.
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: I mean, you know, I'm a guy in my 50s
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: now saying this. Like, you know what I mean? Coming up,
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: when you're a really young guy, it's a little bit different.
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: We're more worried about what other people are going to
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: say about us. Yeah. Like, you know, that whole tidal
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: wave of disapproval from people. What are they going to say?
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: And after a while, you're like, I've been through it
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: so many times, I just don't care.
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: Like, you know, but I've had fighters even ask me, like, hey, bro,
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: does she like, but asking legitimate, not trying to, asking
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: questions that they'd be afraid to ask publicly because people
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: would think it was rude, but they're things that they
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: wanted to know. And I never mind answering that stuff.
• 20:48
  Speaker 2: It's not some giant sacred subject, you know, you just
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: talk about it like you talk about anything else.
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: You know, it's so funny, I always think, like, I
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: know you love the UFC and you and Matt Serra
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: have had a show for about a decade now.
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: About eight or nine years. Yeah, UFC unfiltered. Dana just
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: called me one day. He goes, hey, we're doing a podcast.
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: Matt's going to do it. Do you want to do it?
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: I'm like, okay.
• 21:10
  Speaker 4: He goes, all right.
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: And that's how it was done. So cool. It was
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: just a phone call. And I think it was 2016
• 21:14
  Speaker 2: we started. And did he fight? He fought George St.
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: Pierre a couple times, didn't he? He took the title
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: from St.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: Pierre.
• 21:21
  Speaker 2: He's the last guy to beat St.
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: Pierre.
• 21:22
  Speaker 2: And then George beat him in the rematch and took
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: the title back. But Matt is probably... the most exactly
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: how you think he's going to be guy I've ever known.
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: He's a hundred percent genuine. Like there's no bullshit with
• 21:37
  Speaker 2: Matt Serra. Like if he likes you, he loves you.
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: And if he doesn't like you, he can't pretend he's,
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: he's one of those guys. Like he can't pretend he
• 21:44
  Speaker 2: likes somebody who doesn't like, uh i love him i
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: i have such a good time with him he's really
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: funny um that's awesome very grounded guy and fighters respect
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: him like when fighters call in because he's a legend
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: i mean he did the impossible it's the biggest uh
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: underdog story in ufc history so when they when they
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: come in they all love talking to matt like you
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: know i mean i'm just kind of there yeah like
• 22:05
  Speaker 2: they'll go yeah you and then but matt you know
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: so it's kind of humiliating every week yeah If you've
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: ever worked with a legend, it's like really like, wow.
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: I mean, like you see the respect he gets from fighters.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: I'm happy to see it.
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: One thing that amazes me about UFC, like I think I,
• 22:20
  Speaker 1: there's a, there's a, like a symbioticness between, I feel
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: like fighters, comedians, strippers, even like of trying to show
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: yourself to like trying to show something about you to
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: be seen.
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 22:33
  Speaker 1: That's a little bit abnormal, right? Do you think that
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: makes any sense a little bit? Like, because I also
• 22:39
  Speaker 1: feel like I relate to some of those people, like
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: on some kind of a level of like, we're just
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: trying to be seen somehow. I just, for me, it's
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: that way anyway, you know? like sometimes it's like, do
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: you think like a kid, a young kid really wants
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: to be out there punching his brains out or he's
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: just trying to get seen by like somebody in his
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: life or some, you know?
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: I don't know what motivates people to fight. Like some
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: people like come out of poverty and it's just, they
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: see they can do it and it's a way to
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: make a living. And other people, maybe they just realize
• 23:10
  Speaker 2: they're athletic and they fall into it and they start wrestling.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: I don't, honestly, that's a good question. I don't know.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: I would equate, like what you said about strippers and comics,
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: like there's something about showing people something that most people
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: keep private and wanting them to like it and putting
• 23:26
  Speaker 2: it out there in a way where they can like
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: it and they can relate to. That I definitely see
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: a tie-in to. How do I expose this thing in
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: myself or this humiliating factor or this insecurity and get
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: people to look at it and kind of laugh and
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: then go, okay. You want people to laugh. I don't
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: want people in the crowd going, good point, Jim. No
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: one gives a shit about that. It's fucking embarrassing. You know,
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: the applause break doesn't mean anything. Like you won't be,
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: they have to laugh. It's first and foremost.
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: You almost got an applause break last night. Do you
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: feel that one moment or was like two claps away
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: from an applause break?
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: Oh, I didn't even notice it. Yeah. I did not
• 23:59
  Speaker 2: even notice it. I just, I plow straight through and
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: I very rarely get applause breaks. You know what I mean?
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: Maybe I move to. I never do either.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: But then sometimes you see guys, yeah, I mean like
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: watching Louie yesterday too. But he's on, he goes into
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: so much. you're so bizarre by the end of some
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: of his stories you're so deep.
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: It's like what a great brain like watching him we've
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: been out on the road and we got a bunch
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: more dates coming up and just watching his brain work
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: like each bit is crafted like some of these things
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: are such ludicrous thoughts and then they just wind up
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: the crowd agrees the thought and they go into this
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: strange area it's so much fun to watch like how
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: creative a stand-up can be yeah Yes.
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 24:42
  Speaker 1: And it's so inspiring watching both you guys, man. There's
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: moments where I'm watching the people in the crowd and
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: a lot of times it feels like it's a guy
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: and they usually are holding their girl pretty close. It's
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: kind of like they convince the girl, Oh, it's going to,
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: we're going to have a great time.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: You're going to love these guys.
• 24:56
  Speaker 1: And they're doing extra, like, I'm gonna put my arm
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: around my girl, make sure she knows we're here together tonight.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: Even though he can feel them, like, maybe really some
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: disdain at some of the material.
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: I feel people pull back sometimes, which is, you know
• 25:10
  Speaker 2: what I mean? I talk about certain things. I feel people,
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: but that's what it is. It is what it is.
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: You know, one thing I avoid doing, like, I never
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: preach politics. It's so boring to lecture the audience. Oh,
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: I agree, I agree. Oh my God. I don't need
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: to convince them of anything. Like I want them to
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: have a good time and hopefully see my point. Even
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: if they don't agree with it, I want them to
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: know why I got there. And that's it. Like you
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: can't try to change. No one's going to walk out
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: of my fucking show educated. It's not my job. I
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: blink a lot. I dropped out of high school. No
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: one's coming to me to teach them a lesson. Ice coffee,
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: cold coffee. Cold coffee.
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: Dude, you had the one, I don't know if it
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: was in Unconceivable or if it was on stage last night.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: It was about the military and that some of them
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: aren't mentally well.
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: That was last night. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're like,
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: that's who we want over there. You think I want
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: the fucking... I don't want mentally, what you would consider
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: mentally healthy. I don't want that. You had the nervous
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: college kid creeping around with his little gun. Yeah, I
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: want the fucking completely deranged person. The crazier you think
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: somebody is, the more likely I want them to be
• 26:16
  Speaker 2: sent over with a fucking weapon. Yeah, you do. You
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: face that. But a lot of it's common sense pushback
• 26:22
  Speaker 2: against where I think progressives were very crazy. And I
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: also think some of it's bigotry. People look at it
• 26:27
  Speaker 2: like it's just one thing. It's like anything in life.
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: There's look at this, then you look at that, then
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: you look at that. Everything is an individual thing to
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: be looked at. There's not one answer that covers all
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: of it. Yeah, I agree.
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: I mean, I'll have people ask me about how could I,
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: you know, how could I probably lean more conservative in
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: the last election? Yeah. but then also be a Palestine advocate,
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: you know? It's like, I don't see how any of
• 26:54
  Speaker 1: those things are connected. Like, I would never attach myself
• 26:57
  Speaker 1: to one specific, like, so I'm this way for everything.
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: That seems crazy to me. It's because people are dumb,
• 27:03
  Speaker 2: and they masquerade as these real brave truth tellers, But
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: a lot of people are very frightened of pushback from
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: the group that they belong to. So they do everything
• 27:12
  Speaker 2: lockstep with the group they belong to. That's true. You
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: can have mixed feelings about things. Like you can be
• 27:18
  Speaker 2: an advocate for Palestine and then you can also like
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: AOC and you can vote for Trump. Like you can
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: have mixed feelings about things. People just want to say
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: you're here or you're there. But that's their own– fear
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: of being left out alone. They're afraid of being isolated,
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: so they need the group. They're joiners, but they're masquerading
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: as brave truth-tellers. It's annoying.
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. You know, I do
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: this thing where I'll be at the grocery store, and
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: I'll talk to the butcher like he's my therapist, you know?
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: He'll be back there. He's just, you know, chopping up
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: a chicken.
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: Brisket or whatever, and I'll be like, I need help,
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  Speaker 1: Right now, our listeners get 10% off their first month
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  Speaker 1: at betterhelp.com slash T-H-E-O. That's betterhelp.com slash Theo. Is pornography
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: causing a problem in your life? Do you find yourself
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping?
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: certainly not alone. Watching pornography has become so commonplace today,
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: and oftentimes men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety,
• 29:19
  Speaker 1: and depression. Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: these issues and getting help for them. I want to
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: introduce you to my friend, Steve. Steve is the founder
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn
• 29:33
  Speaker 1: abuse and sexual compulsivity. Steve is a long-term sexual recovery
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: member and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: of abusing pornography and has dedicated his life to empowering
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: and he is a close friend of mine.
• 29:53
  Speaker 2: I mean that.
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: have a healthier sex life Their coaches are in long-term
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery,
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: please visit them at www.valorrecoverycoaching.com or email them at admin
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: at valorrecoverycoaching.com.
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: Thank you. So since you ended up marrying a trans woman.
• 30:31
  Speaker 2: Cut that out. Sorry. That's what she said too probably.
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: Cut that out. Cut that off. That's where I was
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: trying to go. It's almost there. I messed it up. Yeah,
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: that's okay. If she wanted to, she could. I'd miss her. Yeah, dude.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: Do you think we are getting more like, Do you
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: think we're getting more– I don't want to say depraved,
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: but it's more– in one view, it would be depraved
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: if you looked at like these evangelical type of views
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: or like people that came over on the Mayflower. Like sexually,
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: they'd see us probably as more depraved.
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: Sure, sure.
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: But do you feel like we're just evolving or just
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: adjusting into different, more sexual norms?
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think so. And it's also like the depravity. Like,
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: I don't believe people's, like, I don't believe the people,
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: some of them, sure, but the majority of the ones
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: who are scolding and going, how could you do that?
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: And then you realize that in DC, these prostitutes are going,
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: do you know how many of these senators I fuck
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: or how many of these congressmen I fuck? Like, so
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: I don't buy any of it. Like, there are people
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: who live that way, But as far as, again, a
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: moral lecture or a sexual acceptability lecture from some, I just,
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: I don't believe any of them and I don't respect
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: any of their opinions. But yeah, I think we are
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: more open than we used to be, sure. I mean,
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: what's considered the norm now is different. I mean, back
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: in the Mayflower days, if you were fucking gay, they'd
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: Probably hit you with a rod. I don't know what
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: they would do, but it wasn't good. They weren't happy
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: to see you.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: But I bet there was low-key a lot of support
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: for a gay man on those boats because you're on
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: the ship for a long time.
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: In high stockings. I mean, come on. Are you going
• 32:14
  Speaker 2: to tell me Miles Standish didn't get his asshole played with? Yeah.
• 32:20
  Speaker 2: I hope that was his name. It had to have been, dude.
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: But yeah, you're telling me you're out there drinking. How
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: many women were on the Mayflower? Let's take a gant
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: because that's going to help.
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: I'm going to guess very few or none. Or none.
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: I think that's a great point. How many women were
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: on the Mayflower? Probably none of them. Probably all men.
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: The number of women, most sources agree that 18 adult
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: women began the Mayflower journey. Only four or five women.
• 32:48
  Speaker 1: were still alive by the spring of 1621.
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God. I guess it was a long line
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: outside each door. Yeah. Can you imagine that, though?
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: Hiding. Pregnancy.
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: Three of the women, Elizabeth Hopkins, Susanna White, and Mary Allerton,
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: were pregnant during the voyage.
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: And the crazy part is there's no way to prove
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: whose baby it was back then until it's born, and
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: you look at it and go, oh, yeah, sure. Because
• 33:09
  Speaker 2: there was no DNA testing. There was no, so 10
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: guys fuck you, and one of them gets you pregnant.
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: Oh, well.
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: God, can you imagine, though?
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: Guys would just be trying to get you drunk so
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: that they could then go approach your wife, or they
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: would just be trying to get somebody else, like some
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: other guys, get them and another man so drunk that
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: they could just pretend that they weren't gay for a
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: little while.
• 33:32
  Speaker 2: For a little while, yeah. Oh, and have sex with
• 33:34
  Speaker 2: the woman, yeah.
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: Or no, jerk off the man or have sex with
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: the man, but just be like, oh, Suzanne, just keep
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: saying a woman's name during it or something.
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: Oh, and pretend like, By that point, you hope that
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: you wouldn't– because if you're fucking a guy, he's got
• 33:48
  Speaker 2: to know that you're enjoying it and vice versa. You
• 33:51
  Speaker 2: hope that you wouldn't have to be thinking about a
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: woman just to convince yourself. You might have to be like,
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: what's going on here?
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: There's some, I'm sure, like astute white males or whatever
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: who are like in some of these– you know, who
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: were probably getting money from APAC or whatever, who were definitely,
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: you know, who were like banging a guy and be like,
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: what's happening here?
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: This is, you know, like a tremors from an earth.
• 34:16
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: Man, the windows or something.
• 34:19
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: What's going on here? Yeah. No, I understand. What's going on?
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: I'm going to come in this guy. Oh my God.
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: How did this happen? I must've fallen. Veto. Yeah. But yes,
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: in a way you're right. Because I remember it's fun.
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: When I was a kid, when I first started jerking off,
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: I would always try to think of girls, but sometimes
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: I would think of boys. And if I thought of
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: a boy, I was so filled with shame that when
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: I came, I would throw a woman in there. I
• 34:41
  Speaker 2: would press the button, and the last slide would be
• 34:43
  Speaker 2: a girl's face. Like, oh, I just drank. It was
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: such self-delusion. But yeah, in that way, you're right. It's
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: all about shame and how to stave off the shame
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: you feel about whatever it is.
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and our society does adjust so much of that.
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: But it is interesting, like, You know, I go to
• 35:03
  Speaker 1: recovery meetings. I'm in SLA recovery and stuff like that.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: And so, and it's interesting because a lot of it's
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: intimacy disorders, porn addiction. Like there's so many things like,
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: you know, a lot of my, I'd be like, call
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: me or stay away. Like that was like, I would
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: want something like a woman to be close to me.
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: But then when they got close to me, I didn't
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: want them to, you know, just like a lot of like, just,
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: just anarchy.
• 35:25
  Speaker 2: It's being addicted to the hunt as well. It's being
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: addicted to the, the lead up to something happening. And
• 35:32
  Speaker 2: then when it's happening, you're right. You're like, get away. Okay. Now,
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: because the lead up was the high, the lead up
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: with the thing. And now that you're here. Okay. Now
• 35:39
  Speaker 2: it's time for the next drug run, so to speak. Yeah.
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: I definitely get that. Yeah, maybe that's what it was sometimes.
• 35:45
  Speaker 2: For me it was. I would literally look at hookers
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: all night. I would ride around for hours listening to
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: Art Bell. On NPR? No, he was on 770 or
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: 660 overnight. Was it Russ Limbaugh? No, no, Art Bell
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: was a guy. He was in Pahrump, Nevada, and he
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: was very big into UFOs. Oh, yeah, that's that guy?
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: He was the best. Oh, and he passed away? He
• 36:07
  Speaker 2: did die, but I would ride around the meatpacking district
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: and look at prostitutes for hours. I would do the
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: comedy cellar and then ride around. But the ritual for
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: me was looking and talking. And most times I wouldn't
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: pick up. I would just ride around and look and
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: be in that space. So a lot of times it's
• 36:22
  Speaker 2: the whole idea of doing something even more than doing it.
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: Like sometimes you do it, but other times it's just
• 36:27
  Speaker 2: the idea of it.
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: Oh, dude.
• 36:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: Would there be certain things like during the interview process,
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: like when you chat with them, you just kind of say,
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: and you'd, every now and then you just hear a
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: certain thing and you're like, oh, I'll spend more time
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: with this person.
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: Oh, well, when I would talk to them, you know,
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: if I was attracted to them, sure. But if I
• 36:42
  Speaker 2: thought they might be a cop, I was so ritualistic.
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: Like they would have to approach the left side of
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: my window. Like there was weird ritualistic things that had
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: to be clicked. Like any addiction, right? There's this weird,
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: this box is checked, that box is checked. And then
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: I can proceed. But if it didn't happen, it would,
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: one box wasn't checked. It would wreck the whole experience.
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: But yeah, that whole, that's addiction. It's so crazy. Sex
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: is hard. Like porn, I still struggle with porn. I
• 37:08
  Speaker 2: have a hard time. I go into it. I come
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: out of it. It's hard. I know.
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: I just hate the way that I feel after I noticed. Finally,
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: I hate the way I feel the next day after
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: watching and I just feel a little bit like dissolved.
• 37:19
  Speaker 1: I feel like a, like a, like the day before
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: I was kind of a bit of a Rubik's cube
• 37:23
  Speaker 1: and all the color that were matching on the sides
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: and everything. And then the next day I just feel
• 37:27
  Speaker 1: kind of broken and it takes a day for me
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: to get my, energy back organized kind of.
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: That's a good way to put it, dissolved. That's a
• 37:34
  Speaker 2: really good way to put it. you feel kind of
• 37:37
  Speaker 2: like it's a collapsed feeling. And dissolved is the perfect way.
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: You don't feel strong and whole. And it's not a
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: moral thing. It's all that weird chemicals from your own
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: drug administrator. You know what I mean? It's not attractive.
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: It's just me twiddling my nips. Fucking chimp.
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: And, oh, if you had to watch a video of
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: yourself jerking off over all the years, you'd be like, somebody.
• 38:06
  Speaker 2: shut this guy down. Somebody put this kid out of
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: his misery. Yeah, what is he doing? This is long
• 38:12
  Speaker 2: and unpleasant. It'd be like the director's cut of Apocalypse Now.
• 38:15
  Speaker 2: I get why they took that stuff out. We didn't
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: need the fucking dinner with the French people. It sucked. Yeah,
• 38:20
  Speaker 2: if you had to watch yourself jerk, especially if you
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: could add up all the time, the amount of hours
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: or weeks or months, whatever it comes to. You'd quit immediately,
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: I bet. You'd quit immediately. And it is wasted time. Oh, yeah.
• 38:30
  Speaker 2: It really is. Oh, the waste.
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: But I would do the same thing if I would
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: look at... I would get high on cocaine. I would
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: look at hookers online.
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, yeah.
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: And I would like just be looking. I would look
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: at the photo, and I would be like, ah. And
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: then I would barter. I was like just poor, and
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: I would barter. But then when someone would come over,
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: I would often take the money, put it out of
• 38:57
  Speaker 1: the door, give it to them, and have them go,
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: home I was too nervous to have somebody like yeah
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: in my presence one time a lady came over and
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: she had she said that she had to get a
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: brain tumor taken out or something and I was like
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: whoa you know and I just sat with her for
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: a little while and talked about talked about some stuff
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: and then just she just went home.
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah sometimes when you you also realize like they're real
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: people and then you realize like why am I doing
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: this like I used to love talking to women after
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: like I used to love the conversation afterwards like after
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: sex or whatever, we would just sit and chat or
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: if I would drop them off, we would talk. And
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: I realized it was just, it's a lot of loneliness.
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: Like you're just lonely and you don't know how else to, to,
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: to meet somebody. I didn't know how to go out
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: and talk to people. So that was a way of
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: meeting people. That shit I don't miss. Like, Being married,
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: the one thing I like, like, I can just call
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: my wife and talk to her. Like, you know what
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: I mean? Like, we actually, it's a nice, stable thing
• 39:54
  Speaker 2: to have in your life. Like, a person who you
• 39:56
  Speaker 2: really like. And loving somebody, yeah, yeah. But, I mean,
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: you have to like them, too. It's not enough to
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: love somebody. Like, you have to like talking to them.
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: And you have to enjoy. And we have our dumb dog.
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: And I'll just be on FaceTime with her and the dog.
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, this is the life I want. The
• 40:09
  Speaker 2: dog shits all over. It makes me furious. But it's
• 40:12
  Speaker 2: still a nice life. You know what I mean? Compared
• 40:14
  Speaker 2: to what was going on before, which was very lonely
• 40:17
  Speaker 2: and isolated. Yeah, it does.
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: It's just interesting. You get kind of like trapped in
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: patterns over time. And when you're a comedian, it feels
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: like you don't ever have to grow. Or I don't
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: know if it's a comedian.
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: I've struggled at certain points in my life to grow up,
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: you know? I didn't realize for years that I hadn't
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: been growing up really. I was kind of trapped, I think,
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: in like a child's ways a lot of times. But
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: they were working out okay because we're in comedy and
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: it's like, You don't have a ton of responsibility.
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: It's all on you. You have to show up.
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: You know, it's like, you know, it felt almost like
• 40:49
  Speaker 1: a kid could do it. And, but you also, there's
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: something about that that is good too.
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: Like, cause our impression of somebody growing up and getting
• 40:56
  Speaker 2: older was like, you know, you, you, you go up,
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: you retire, you get the gold watch and then you
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: go into a home and you're finished. Like there was a,
• 41:03
  Speaker 2: a process and there was a definitive end at the
• 41:05
  Speaker 2: end of the tunnel. But when you always feel like
• 41:08
  Speaker 2: I don't have to grow up and follow that pattern,
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: you always feel like I don't know what's ahead of me.
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: Like you don't see the end. Wait, say that part again.
• 41:14
  Speaker 2: I want to hear it. You don't feel like you
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: can always see the end. You don't know what's ahead
• 41:18
  Speaker 2: because you're not following the pattern of people growing up.
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: So it makes everything more exciting, you think? More exciting, yeah.
• 41:23
  Speaker 2: And you feel like there's an endless amount of time.
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: I don't know which direction this is going to go in.
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: That's the terrifying part of doing things the way like
• 41:31
  Speaker 2: your parents do it is that you see A, B, C, D.
• 41:36
  Speaker 2: But if you're kind of stuck between A and B
• 41:38
  Speaker 2: in some way, you have no idea where you're headed yet.
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: And it still feels like the end is not directly
• 41:43
  Speaker 2: in front of me.
• 41:43
  Speaker 1: And that makes you also continue to feel young because
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: it's that same feeling that you always had when you
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: were young.
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it is. And I think it's a healthy way
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: to be. I don't think it's crazy. As long as
• 41:52
  Speaker 2: you're paying your bills... And you're decent to the person
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: that you're with. Like, you know, it's a fun life. Like,
• 41:58
  Speaker 2: we fought to not have a boss, to not have
• 42:01
  Speaker 2: a retirement age. Like, this is the dream life. This
• 42:03
  Speaker 2: is what I wanted to do. Sometimes I'll be in
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: a hotel, man, and I'm like, shut up, you fucking asshole.
• 42:08
  Speaker 2: How many of your friends have to get up and
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: go to a warehouse on Tuesday morning?
• 42:11
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: And you're mad you have to drive to Asheville? Shut up. Yeah. Like,
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: I mean, this is like what you wanted, and you
• 42:17
  Speaker 2: got it. So even with great jobs, there's annoying parts
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: of it. Yeah, that's the truth. And it's fun. It's fun.
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: You're going to get to go to Asheville. That place
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: is amazing. Did I remember the first time? That's one
• 42:28
  Speaker 1: of the true, the blessings I think of having worked
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: in this job is like, like I got to go
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: to La Crosse, Wisconsin, dude.
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: Blew my mind. What is it?
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: It's a town in Wisconsin. It's like this beautiful like hill,
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: like kind of small mountain right on.
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: The edge of it.
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: And it's just amazing, man. It's like we were right
• 42:46
  Speaker 1: there like the weekend before Halloween. So you had like
• 42:49
  Speaker 1: All the kids being like brought home from their parents
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: after school and their costumes and the leaves are all fall.
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: It just looked like you couldn't, it was like the
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: perfect place to grow up is what it looked like.
• 42:59
  Speaker 2: Do you want kids? Yeah, I want to have kids.
• 43:01
  Speaker 3: You do?
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I just think I would like to do it.
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: I would like, I think it'll help me like just
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: not think about me. You know, you start to get
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: exhausted of yourself.
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: Yes. And they say that's the thing. Kids open up
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: that thing. And I know that by not having kids.
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: And I've never wanted kids. I don't feel like I'm missing. No, never.
• 43:19
  Speaker 1: Never.
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: Does Nikki want them? She would love to adopt. She
• 43:22
  Speaker 2: would love to adopt. I could see you getting something cool.
• 43:25
  Speaker 2: I could see me dying and then her doing that,
• 43:27
  Speaker 2: which is great. I told her, like, when I drop dead,
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: do what you want. Sell my stupid kiss posters and
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: get yourself a kid. But I've never wanted it. I
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: don't dislike kids, but I don't feel it. But when
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: I hear somebody who wants them like that, it does
• 43:42
  Speaker 2: supposedly open up a part of you. And everyone I
• 43:44
  Speaker 2: know who has kids says it. It's a good thing.
• 43:47
  Speaker 2: And you start thinking about something other than yourself and
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: your purpose is other than yourself. For me, I haven't
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: had that. Maybe that's why I'm a half-miserable fucking idiot
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: in my 50s. on Japanese kiss poster auction sites like
• 44:01
  Speaker 2: a fucking idiot instead of worrying about my kid's soccer game.
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean? Maybe that's, maybe you're right. That's,
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: it's probably, it opens up that part's healthier.
• 44:08
  Speaker 1: Going back to like, if you had, if you were
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: able to, if you're, is there part of you like,
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: cause you said that if I died, then my wife
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: could go ahead and get, if she wants to get
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: kids and that's fine.
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: Is there a little part of you.
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: That's like, that still feels like having a family in
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: a weird way. Like at least I was able to
• 44:29
  Speaker 1: help and support somebody and create an environment for them
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: to have a family, like in a weird way.
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: Does that make any sense? No, but it's not when
• 44:37
  Speaker 2: you say it, it sounds really nice, but it's never
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: occurred to me. Like, um, again, I feel like with
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: my wife and a small dog, it's such a different
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: life than I ever had. Like it's a hundred percent different,
• 44:50
  Speaker 2: but I feel like that's my family.
• 44:52
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: Got it.
• 44:52
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: But you're right. Like, I am facilitating for someone to
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: have them if she wants them. Because I tell her,
• 44:57
  Speaker 2: I'll be dead long before you. Like, so do what
• 45:00
  Speaker 2: you want when I'm dead. I don't care. Sell my
• 45:02
  Speaker 2: shit and, you know, find some young fucking Latin guy and,
• 45:05
  Speaker 2: you know, have a great life. And she would. Believe me.
• 45:09
  Speaker 2: While they were still powdering my face in the casket,
• 45:11
  Speaker 2: getting fucked.
• 45:12
  Speaker 1: Dude, they should put a tattoo of you on the
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: guy's back, though. That would be kind of nice. Or
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: on his stomach, so she really has to look at
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: it when they're intimate. No, she'll do what she wants.
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: I just never wanted it, man. I don't have anything
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: against it. I respect it. All my friends who do
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: it are happy they did it.
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: I watched Bobby Kelly go, like, from being a single
• 45:31
  Speaker 2: guy and then, you know, long-term relationship, son, loves, he
• 45:35
  Speaker 2: loves his life like that. Like, it's just not for me. Like,
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: I see it, and I'm happy for my friends, but
• 45:41
  Speaker 2: I don't envy it. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Like,
• 45:44
  Speaker 2: when I'm around children, I never go, like, That instinct
• 45:47
  Speaker 2: in me is never, and it doesn't pull me in
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: that direction. Even around my nephews, who I love very much,
• 45:54
  Speaker 2: I would love them and hang out with them, but
• 45:56
  Speaker 2: it never made me want to go have a kid.
• 45:59
  Speaker 1: But I don't know, maybe that's selfish, right? Maybe I'm
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: a selfish, maybe. Maybe it's selfish also to have them.
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't have them just in order to get me
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: out of my own ego jail that happens sometimes. I mean,
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: I know it's like– yeah, I would like to be
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: able to have like– I think part of me is
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: like I would like to be able to create a
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: safe experience for a child in the world because I
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: don't know if I felt like I had that a
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: lot of times. I felt like I want to try
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: my best to fill in some of those holes that
• 46:25
  Speaker 1: I didn't have to– because I think our lineage kind
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: of deserves that somewhat, and I think– since I really love,
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: love that childhood stuff and a lot of like the
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: emotional side of it, I think I could probably service
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: that pretty well.
• 46:41
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 46:41
  Speaker 1: So I would like to like respectfully try my hand
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: at that with a woman who is a very loving
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: mom who wants to be a mom and with a
• 46:50
  Speaker 1: kid who is willing to, you know, be, you know,
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: just be my son or daughter.
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: Well, you would actually like, you know, because you have this,
• 46:57
  Speaker 2: like you said, we don't grow up. There's a lot
• 47:00
  Speaker 2: of time to have fun with a kid too. Like,
• 47:01
  Speaker 2: you know what I mean? Like in our life, it
• 47:02
  Speaker 2: does afford us a lot of things that most people
• 47:05
  Speaker 2: can't do. Like you can book a gig on the road.
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: If you want to go to Hawaii, you book Hawaii
• 47:10
  Speaker 2: and you could bring your family. Like most people can't
• 47:12
  Speaker 2: do that. Right. They have to schedule it around Like,
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: I'm not doing radio for the first time in 20 years,
• 47:16
  Speaker 2: and it's so weird not having a schedule. It's so
• 47:19
  Speaker 2: weird not going, okay, well, Labor Day, Memorial Day, like,
• 47:22
  Speaker 2: this is when we get off, this is when we
• 47:23
  Speaker 2: don't get off. To just be able to go on
• 47:25
  Speaker 2: the road and do what I want to do is
• 47:27
  Speaker 2: a very foreign feeling. I love it. It's nice. And
• 47:30
  Speaker 2: having a kid, you could do that. You could just
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: book a place. Not that, you know, having a kid
• 47:34
  Speaker 2: and having a radio show are the same thing. But you,
• 47:38
  Speaker 2: I don't know, you got to get up early. Yeah,
• 47:40
  Speaker 2: you're right. It kind of sucks. You kind of don't
• 47:42
  Speaker 2: want to look at the people you're talking to.
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, me neither.
• 47:44
  Speaker 2: Exactly. It's like any other partnership. Yeah, the food sucks.
• 47:49
  Speaker 2: The food sucks. Yeah, the hours are kind of annoying.
• 47:52
  Speaker 2: You got to wake up when you don't want to
• 47:53
  Speaker 2: wake up. You're fucking cranky through most of it. Yeah,
• 47:56
  Speaker 2: your partner's there. Fuck them, you know. Yeah, because they
• 48:00
  Speaker 2: made it in before I did. You're like, ugh. You're
• 48:02
  Speaker 2: happy to be here, aren't you?
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 48:04
  Speaker 2: But I do kind of miss it a little bit.
• 48:05
  Speaker 2: Like I miss the structure of it, but I also
• 48:07
  Speaker 2: like not having it. Oh, it was so much fun
• 48:09
  Speaker 2: when you guys had, I mean, I only got to
• 48:10
  Speaker 2: go when it was open. Actually, I came when it
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: was Jim and Sam too. Okay. But I never got
• 48:14
  Speaker 2: to go when Anthony was there. Yeah. But it was fun.
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: Like, I mean, that was like some of the first
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: times I ever got to be in a place where
• 48:20
  Speaker 1: like people got to hear my voice that were like
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: paying attention. Yeah. Um, like we talked to Bobby Kennedy
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: on that show, which was on you guys' show, which
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: was crazy because he and I became friends years later,
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: which was wild.
• 48:31
  Speaker 2: Was he in studio? Like, I think he was in
• 48:33
  Speaker 2: studio with us. Wasn't he? Like, uh, for some reason,
• 48:37
  Speaker 2: did Robert Kennedy just call in? He called in. Oh,
• 48:40
  Speaker 2: it was a phone call. I thought I saw a
• 48:41
  Speaker 2: picture of all of us together.
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: And I'd never heard of him. And I thought he'd
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: been like electrocuted or fucking, you know. or people were
• 48:48
  Speaker 1: fucking him while he was talking or whatever.
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: Like, I didn't know what was going on. Those are
• 48:51
  Speaker 2: really bizarre reasons for the voice. Yeah. Wait, is that
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: him right there? Oh, nevermind. I thought I saw that.
• 48:58
  Speaker 2: That's myself. I can't, I don't have my glasses. And, uh,
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: Florentine and Opie and, uh, Yeah, and that's Robert Kennedy.
• 49:06
  Speaker 2: I didn't remember that. Look how skinny I was. No,
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: I know back then I look like a weird Photoshopped
• 49:13
  Speaker 2: version of what I am now.
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: You look almost feminine there a little bit. You look
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: kind of like a white Charlemagne kind of.
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: Ha ha ha ha! that is funny and he would
• 49:23
  Speaker 2: hate that He knows I think he's a handsome guy.
• 49:27
  Speaker 4: No, no, no.
• 49:28
  Speaker 2: But nobody wants to be Jim Norton to be like, yeah,
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: you kind of resemble Jim Norton. But that, you're right.
• 49:34
  Speaker 2: It is like a little, my wife hates me like that. Like,
• 49:37
  Speaker 2: she's like, you fucking look like a little twink. You
• 49:40
  Speaker 2: look sick. I don't like it. She's like, you're not
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: a fucking small. You're a medium. She makes me, she
• 49:45
  Speaker 2: never wants me to be like that again. But that's
• 49:47
  Speaker 2: how I want to be. And it does look kind
• 49:49
  Speaker 2: of sickly. Like when I see that, like my neck,
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: my head, like, and I was so depressed at that
• 49:54
  Speaker 2: point in my life. So I wasn't even happy.
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: You seem like you were doing great. And then Daryl Strawberry,
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: that's the day I came in so coked up.
• 50:01
  Speaker 2: Were you coked up that day?
• 50:03
  Speaker 1: Oh, bro, that started my, that day, I made a
• 50:08
  Speaker 1: story for Ari Shaffir's show. And that story, like, That story, like,
• 50:13
  Speaker 1: is when people started paying attention to my comedy.
• 50:17
  Speaker 2: Oh, really?
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I ended up in a taxi cab, driving a
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: taxi cab, high on cocaine. The driver had picked me up.
• 50:26
  Speaker 1: There was a girl in the cab. We're dropping her off.
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: She kind of rejected me.
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: I didn't, like, make... Like, I was just, like, she
• 50:30
  Speaker 2: was laying in my lap. I was trying to, like,
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: give her a kiss, you know? Yeah. Because it felt
• 50:33
  Speaker 2: like she was flirting. She laid in my lap. Of course.
• 50:36
  Speaker 2: So I, like, you know, whatever. And I didn't be aggressive,
• 50:38
  Speaker 2: but she, like, was like, what are you doing? And
• 50:40
  Speaker 2: so then.
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: I felt some rejection. She got dropped off where she
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: was going. It was just me and the driver. And
• 50:48
  Speaker 1: I was like, let's go get some coke. You know
• 50:49
  Speaker 1: where we can get some cocaine. And then it was
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: like next two hours later, I'm driving. He has a hooker.
• 50:54
  Speaker 1: He's bought hookers for us. He's in the back of
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: the taxi. We're up in like Washington.
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: Washington Heights. Washington Heights. Yep.
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: And I have to be at the radio station the
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: next morning at like 630. I get dropped off at
• 51:08
  Speaker 1: my hotel at 550, right? It's a couple blocks away.
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: I shower and I walk over there, dude. And it
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: was the scariest walk ever because every moment of the
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: walk was so scary. And I just was like rattled.
• 51:20
  Speaker 1: And I got inside and I sat on the show.
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: I couldn't even talk.
• 51:23
  Speaker 2: I don't remember.
• 51:24
  Speaker 1: And Daryl Strawberry was the guest. And I'd always thought
• 51:26
  Speaker 1: he was like this drug addict. And here he was,
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: pure as a driven snow.
• 51:31
  Speaker 2: Sober. He's clean and sober. I think he still is.
• 51:33
  Speaker 2: I hope he still is. But yeah, he came. Joe
• 51:35
  Speaker 2: Torre told us about him, about the plane going in.
• 51:37
  Speaker 2: It was really bad turbulence and everyone was panicking. But
• 51:39
  Speaker 2: Daryl was reading his Bible in the back. So like
• 51:41
  Speaker 2: he turned around and like has this sober life and
• 51:44
  Speaker 2: it's weird being fucked up around somebody that's sober. It's uncomfortable.
• 51:48
  Speaker 1: And I'd always thought he was this way. And I'd
• 51:50
  Speaker 1: always thought I was kind of like toe in the
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: line and do, you know, straight. And then it was
• 51:54
  Speaker 1: this moment where everything, and that's when I got into, uh,
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: recovery rooms after that.
• 52:00
  Speaker 4: Really?
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, that was... Literally the two days after. That show, like,
• 52:03
  Speaker 2: you know, the Opie and Anthony show was a different thing. Like,
• 52:06
  Speaker 2: it was... And Opie and I did what we could.
• 52:08
  Speaker 2: It's hard to follow the Opie and Anthony show. You
• 52:10
  Speaker 2: know what I mean? It's a hard act to follow,
• 52:13
  Speaker 2: especially when it was uprooted without any one of us
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: wanting it to be uprooted. But, man, I look back
• 52:18
  Speaker 2: at that show, and I'm really glad I was a
• 52:20
  Speaker 2: part of that. Like, there was some really funny shit
• 52:22
  Speaker 2: on that show. Great comics coming through, everyone being vicious
• 52:26
  Speaker 2: to each other. Like, you know what I mean? It
• 52:28
  Speaker 2: was a really... There was a lot of fun times
• 52:31
  Speaker 2: on that show.
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: God, that was so fun. It felt like the luckiest
• 52:35
  Speaker 1: place in the world. There was no better call you
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: could get at the time in the country, I don't think,
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: than to go on to that show. And some people
• 52:42
  Speaker 1: didn't even recognize it, and that's fine.
• 52:44
  Speaker 2: Fuck them. But to go in there and sit in
• 52:46
  Speaker 2: there with guys, DeStefano, Sherrod Small, Pete Davidson, Mark Norman
• 52:51
  Speaker 2: would be in there, just like... Everybody. Vic Henley, like... Yeah. Greg... Oh,
• 52:58
  Speaker 2: Jim Florentine. Oh, Jim Florentine. My bad, yeah. Just all
• 53:01
  Speaker 2: those guys, man. That was magical. It was fun, and
• 53:04
  Speaker 2: you would see your friends. I mean, the last time
• 53:06
  Speaker 2: I saw Patrice, I remember he was on ONA, and
• 53:10
  Speaker 2: he was coming in one day, and they're like, hey,
• 53:12
  Speaker 2: Patrice is coming in either Thursday or Friday, and we
• 53:15
  Speaker 2: were just having an after-show meeting, and they're like, do
• 53:16
  Speaker 2: you have any preference? And I remember going, hey, let's
• 53:19
  Speaker 2: do Thursday because I'm traveling Friday. I won't be here,
• 53:22
  Speaker 2: and I wanted to see him. And he came in,
• 53:24
  Speaker 2: and he did the show, That was the last time
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: I saw him. So it was like you saw people
• 53:28
  Speaker 2: that you would not have been likely to see coming through.
• 53:33
  Speaker 2: Friends that were on the road. You would always get
• 53:36
  Speaker 2: to see them because they'd come in the studio. That
• 53:38
  Speaker 2: I miss a lot, being in the center of that.
• 53:41
  Speaker 2: You know what I mean? And everyone headlines, so you
• 53:43
  Speaker 2: don't see your friends anymore. You'd probably go years without
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: seeing guys that you like. Totally. But there, I would
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: see guys come through. Yeah, man, I really love those
• 53:53
  Speaker 2: days a lot. It was special. Yeah, I felt like
• 53:56
  Speaker 2: it was. You got to go to, you went to
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: Ozzy's last show? Yeah, me and Jim Florentine. Florentine got
• 54:04
  Speaker 2: me my first paid gig in comedy. He's my oldest
• 54:06
  Speaker 2: friend in comedy. And we knew Sabbath was doing one
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: more show. So we went to London and Birmingham, booked
• 54:13
  Speaker 2: a couple gigs just to pay for the trip. Yeah.
• 54:15
  Speaker 2: And we did get to go to the show. I'm
• 54:18
  Speaker 2: so happy we went. Yeah?
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 54:20
  Speaker 2: And we said hello to Ozzy briefly at the end. Again,
• 54:23
  Speaker 2: he was very frail at that point. Um, he was
• 54:26
  Speaker 2: in a wheelchair, but we still got to say hello.
• 54:28
  Speaker 2: And I'm really happy. We got to say hi, at
• 54:29
  Speaker 2: least in time. I love the show. It was great. Um, yeah,
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: it was, it was an unbelievable trip. We went to
• 54:35
  Speaker 2: the black Sabbath house. We did a video where the,
• 54:38
  Speaker 2: you know, you ever see the original black Sabbath album cover.
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: There's a, a woman in front of, uh, this, this
• 54:43
  Speaker 2: ominous house. Um, and we went there and we actually
• 54:46
  Speaker 2: went up and looked inside. It was, it was a really,
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: it was like, you know, again, with your, your dumb friend,
• 54:50
  Speaker 2: it's like, we should have done this 40 years ago.
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: Like the fact that we did this in our late fifties,
• 54:54
  Speaker 2: we should both be fucking pushed into a ditch.
• 54:57
  Speaker 3: Idiots.
• 55:00
  Speaker 1: Well, there's also shit you get into on the road.
• 55:03
  Speaker 1: Did you get to see Jack or Kelly or, um, yes,
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: I saw both of them backstage.
• 55:07
  Speaker 2: Um, awesome. I don't know. Kelly, she's a sweetheart and she,
• 55:11
  Speaker 2: she actually, uh, You know, she told me she was
• 55:14
  Speaker 2: getting married and she was very sweet. And Jack is
• 55:16
  Speaker 2: always great. And it's funny, the day Ozzy died, I
• 55:20
  Speaker 2: was supposed to be in L.A. doing Jack's podcast. I
• 55:23
  Speaker 2: was going out after Sabbath to L.A. for a day
• 55:27
  Speaker 2: to do the podcast. And the day before, whenever they canceled,
• 55:30
  Speaker 2: they're like, yeah, Ozzy died. So, you know, it sucks.
• 55:34
  Speaker 2: Nobody was expecting it this soon.
• 55:36
  Speaker 1: Do you feel like as you get older and people
• 55:40
  Speaker 1: like heroes start to kind of disappear, what is that
• 55:42
  Speaker 1: kind of like?
• 55:43
  Speaker 2: You, you do see, it's almost like I look at
• 55:45
  Speaker 2: us like we're on a production line. Like, you know
• 55:48
  Speaker 2: what I mean? Like going this way. And the more
• 55:50
  Speaker 2: of them that drop off the end, you're like, Oh,
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: my turn is coming. Like, but I also am grateful.
• 55:56
  Speaker 2: Like it makes you grateful. Like you get to know people,
• 55:58
  Speaker 2: you get to meet people you love. Who's the biggest
• 56:00
  Speaker 2: hero you've met since you've been doing standup that you
• 56:03
  Speaker 2: actually got to talk to? Um, That's a good question.
• 56:07
  Speaker 2: Or even the first one. Probably Chris Rock, I think. Really?
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: Like for comedic hero, for sure. Like getting to meet
• 56:14
  Speaker 1: him was pretty, I thought was pretty special. Chris Pratt,
• 56:17
  Speaker 1: I really liked getting to meet just because I think
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: there's something really special about him. Like I think he's
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: a great entertainer, but there's something I think really special
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: about him.
• 56:26
  Speaker 2: Are you shocked when they're fans of yours too? Like
• 56:28
  Speaker 2: if you had anybody that you.
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: Love who like- Jason Momoa, like- The other day I
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: was walking through somewhere and this big arm comes out
• 56:35
  Speaker 1: and just pulls me in. It was just like two
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: different areas passing. There was an open door in between.
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: And I was just like, oh my God.
• 56:41
  Speaker 2: And I thought, I said, it's the guy from Shark Tank, right?
• 56:43
  Speaker 2: I fucked up.
• 56:46
  Speaker 1: And he just started laughing. And he said whatever show
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: it was or whatever. But he was just really nice.
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: And he likes your show. And he just said, hey, man,
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: I just want to let you know that I'm a
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: fan of yours. And, yeah, things like that, especially if
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: it's sometimes like a male figure, I think it like–
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: like I didn't have a lot of that when I
• 57:05
  Speaker 1: was a kid. I didn't have like any male ever
• 57:07
  Speaker 1: like being like– you know, I'm a fan of yours
• 57:09
  Speaker 1: or like, I like what you, you know, I just
• 57:11
  Speaker 1: didn't have any of that energy in my life. And
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: so like even little moments like that, like to me are,
• 57:16
  Speaker 1: are big, you know, um, even Dustin Poirier, he and
• 57:20
  Speaker 1: I becoming friends over the years.
• 57:21
  Speaker 2: I love him. I've never, he's one of the few
• 57:22
  Speaker 2: guys in the UFC I haven't met. I love Dustin.
• 57:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 57:24
  Speaker 1: I mean, he kind of changed my life in some
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: ways of like, um, just of like, uh, you know, I,
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: you know, like just checking in what's up, you know,
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: just little things like that, you know, it makes you,
• 57:35
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Like having like a tough figure that's like,
• 57:39
  Speaker 1: you know, I'm looking out for you. Just something, little
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: thing like that. Even though it's not, it just kind of,
• 57:44
  Speaker 1: it attaches itself to an old place in me that
• 57:46
  Speaker 1: was missing part of a magnet.
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, 100%. And when those click, it like makes
• 57:50
  Speaker 2: you feel something. There's a weird thing too, when you
• 57:52
  Speaker 2: have figures like that in your life who are checking
• 57:54
  Speaker 2: in on you, there's like a weird sense of like
• 57:56
  Speaker 2: accountability in a way. Like even though you're not, you're
• 57:58
  Speaker 2: just friends. but you still don't want your friend to say, hey,
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: how you doing? And you go, oh, fucking, like, you
• 58:02
  Speaker 2: want to at least be doing something good. And your
• 58:05
  Speaker 2: friends can keep you somewhat accountable. Like, you know what
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: I mean? And not in the way that, you know,
• 58:11
  Speaker 2: people use it now. Like, you got to be accountable
• 58:12
  Speaker 2: for what you're saying. Like, you know, that shitty fucking
• 58:15
  Speaker 2: online gotcha nonsense these children are doing. But I mean
• 58:19
  Speaker 2: like when you're personally just feeling like I don't want
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: to let this guy down and have him think I'm
• 58:23
  Speaker 2: an asshole.
• 58:23
  Speaker 1: Right. I'm going to get out of bed today or
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: I'm going to go do this extra thing. Just little
• 58:27
  Speaker 1: things like that that keep people inspired. And then I
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: think we all do that for each other in some ways,
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: you know. Like I'll get that feeling sometimes like I'm
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: just going to rattle this off to this person. Even
• 58:35
  Speaker 1: if they don't hit me back, that's fine.
• 58:36
  Speaker 2: That's right.
• 58:37
  Speaker 1: Just let them know, hey, man, I'm thinking about you.
• 58:39
  Speaker 1: Just let you know. you know, I think you're great
• 58:41
  Speaker 1: or I care about you. Are you doing great today?
• 58:42
  Speaker 1: Just little things like that, you know? And I think
• 58:44
  Speaker 1: sometimes my brother's like, well, those are things you really
• 58:47
  Speaker 1: wish that people would say to you. And I'm like,
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: that's fine. But I think the feeling I get is
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: that I want to share it with somebody else.
• 58:54
  Speaker 2: So it's, it's still okay. Right. A hundred percent. And
• 58:56
  Speaker 2: you're right. And the older you get and the more
• 58:58
  Speaker 2: people that die, like the more people like that die
• 59:01
  Speaker 2: of natural cause overdose side. I mean, we've all, you know, sure.
• 59:04
  Speaker 2: Those things happen. But when they start just dying of
• 59:06
  Speaker 2: like heart issues or things that like are people things,
• 59:10
  Speaker 2: You're like, oh, fuck. So you start telling people you
• 59:12
  Speaker 2: love them more. And like, hey, man, I miss you. Like,
• 59:14
  Speaker 2: I'm not afraid to tell guys, hey, I miss you.
• 59:16
  Speaker 2: Because like, there's one day you're going to be like,
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: I wish I could say that to this person. So
• 59:20
  Speaker 2: I say it. Like, you know what I mean? And
• 59:22
  Speaker 2: when Patrice died, he's just an example. There's nothing in
• 59:25
  Speaker 2: our relationship that went unsaid. Like, there's nothing I wish, oh, man,
• 59:30
  Speaker 2: I wish he, like, we had a complete relationship. You
• 59:33
  Speaker 2: know what I mean? Like- And you make sure that
• 59:35
  Speaker 2: with your close friends, you have complete relationships. So there's
• 59:39
  Speaker 2: nothing that you go like, oh my God, for the
• 59:41
  Speaker 2: rest of my life, I'm going to wish that they
• 59:42
  Speaker 2: knew that I felt this way. Do you know what
• 59:44
  Speaker 2: I mean? Like, and that's really important to me now
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: is like these complete relationships. Like if Bobby, not to
• 59:50
  Speaker 2: jinx Bobby, but if Bobby or Anthony or one of my,
• 59:53
  Speaker 2: dropped it, I would, I would, they, they know how
• 59:55
  Speaker 2: I feel.
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 59:56
  Speaker 2: We, we, we know it's not like it went unsaid.
• 59:59
  Speaker 1: Hmm. Do you ever think over time, like, did you
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 1: think like you were missing relationships like that when you
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: were younger? Like, were you missing like some, like, do
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: you think people could be like missing a connection with
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: like a male figure? And then that gets, that gets,
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 1: that creates gay curiosity in somebody over time.
• 1:00:16
  Speaker 2: Does that make any sense to you? Sure. I mean, what,
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: what creates curiosity in anybody? I don't know. Like that
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 2: could be one thing that causes it like, because you're
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 2: craving that connection and all of a sudden you're like, Well,
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 2: there's a sexual component to this too where I want
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 2: to connect and I think it's sexual. I don't know
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 2: exactly what, like I said, what makes me have a
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 2: pull towards something. But there are things like that I
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 2: think can influence it. Like if you don't have any
• 1:00:43
  Speaker 2: male figures in your life and you get close to
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: a male figure, you may love that person and then
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 2: not know like, wow, is this love like I want
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 2: to lay down with this person or is this just
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 2: a healthy, normal, I love you, man. Like why? Do
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 2: you have gay curiosity?
• 1:00:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I think there was time in my life where I, like, didn't, like,
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: I was just definitely, like, a late bloomer with a
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: lot of, like, intimacy of any type.
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 2: Sure.
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 1: You know, like, I was just talking about this the
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: other day with a friend, but it was, like, even
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 1: now if a woman, like, looks at me or says
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: something nice, I got to change the fucking subject. It's
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: hard for me to be in that moment, right? It's
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 1: hard for me to be right here. And, um, but yeah,
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: growing up, I just felt like I didn't get a
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 1: lot of like, uh, I didn't have like a strong
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: brotherly or fatherly connection. And so like when I started
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 1: to get relationships like that with friends later on, I
• 1:01:32
  Speaker 1: think it was a part of me for a little bit.
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: It was like, oh, is this like a gate? Like
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: I was so desperate for those relationships. So part of me,
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 1: it had a wager in my head. Like, is this
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 1: a gay thing or is this just a friend thing?
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: And then I had to learn how much can you
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 1: just be a friend to somebody without kind of over,
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 1: not seeming into a like a homosexual like space or
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 1: sexual space, but just like. Into where it's awkward for
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: them because you're trying to be too much of a
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: friend because you just have never had that sort of friendship.
• 1:02:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, but there is a it's a feeling
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 2: that there's a definitive like a moat. Like if I
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 2: love one of my friends, I'm like like Bobby or
• 1:02:14
  Speaker 2: any of these guys, a boss. Rotten Voss, who I love. Colin,
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 2: I love these guys. I mean, I really love them.
• 1:02:24
  Speaker 2: And I can hug them and tell them I love you,
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 2: but there's a moat between that and wanting to peck
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 2: them on the neck. Yeah, for sure. There is a
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 2: definitive line. And that's what people a lot of times don't, like,
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 2: Like any guys who are freaked out by my lifestyle,
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 2: like that's fucking gross. Like most guys have to understand
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 2: like the idea of me having sex with you is
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 2: as disgusting to me as it is to you. Like
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 2: it makes me nauseous to think about it. Like if
• 1:02:48
  Speaker 2: any of my friends think I want to jerk off
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 2: with them, they're very delusional. I don't. None of them.
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 2: I don't care if they're built like Rogan. None of
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 2: them would I jerk off with.
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 2: Glazing that ham, brother. None of them. So it's like
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 2: there is a line between love and really connecting with
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 2: a friend and feeling intimate with a buddy, which I'm
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 2: glad as an adult male I'm allowing myself to do.
• 1:03:12
  Speaker 2: Like I'm not afraid of that. And feeling sexual. They're
• 1:03:15
  Speaker 2: completely different things for me. But, you know, there can
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 2: be a difference. You can love somebody without having any
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 2: of that stuff.
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think you just hear so much, like,
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: you know, when you're young, it's like there was always
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 1: so many, like, you can't say this around a dude
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: or something. And a lot of that's kind of changed
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 1: over the years.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: Especially me.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 1: I'm a pretty emotional dude, and so I like thinking
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 1: about emotions. And I like, you know, I like kind
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: of examining that stuff. But, yeah, I think there was
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: probably some times where I was like, is this... Am
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 1: I like, and also I was having so much trouble
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 1: like communicating with women. So it also to say, well,
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 1: maybe I'm gay man, you know, maybe I'm gay man.
• 1:03:50
  Speaker 1: And I, but then I never felt an attraction to men.
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 1: And so it was like, um, but I think some
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 1: of that's pretty normal. I'm amazed at a lot of
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: my friends as I get older that, um, date trans, uh,
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: prefer to date trans women.
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you'll find a lot of people that.
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 1: It's a lot more than I ever expected.
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's part of... People think, like, it's this
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 2: new thing, but a lot of it is people are
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 2: just not hiding anymore.
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 2: Or they're just not as afraid of it. Or they're
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 2: more aware of it because there's more people who are
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 2: trans now, and there's more, like, you know, with surgeries
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 2: and estrogen, and, like, oh, wow, that person looks great. Like,
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 2: there's so many things people do. It's just... It's a
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: part of the culture, and it's not going to go away. Like,
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 2: I know some people... I understand nobody wants an ideology
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 2: beaten over their head. I get it. Nobody wants to
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 2: be told how to feel. I don't scold people if
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 2: they don't agree with me. I don't care. Plenty of
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 2: people I know who I respect and like would find
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 2: my lifestyle awful. It's always funny because I do a
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 2: lot of Gutfeld episodes. And when I go on. I'm
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 2: going to come there one time. He's a nice guy.
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 2: He's a great guy. He really is. He's genuine and
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 2: he's really funny and he's fair. And Jamie Lyssa's on
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 2: there sometimes, huh? Jamie's great on that show. Oh, I
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 2: love Jamie. Tyrus is really great at what he, he's
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 2: just a very naturally funny, good talker. Tyrus is a
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 2: big guy and he's mixed, right? He's mixed.
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: He lives in the town that I'm from in Louisiana.
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 2: Oh, he is from Louisiana. That's right. He goes home
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 2: all the time. That's cool. I saw him at the
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 2: gym one time. He's inspired me in a way because
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 2: he lost so much weight recently. Like it made me
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 2: get back to the gym. I'm like, and I know
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 2: for him, it's been a struggle. And I'm like, he's
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 2: doing it. He's putting up videos of himself boxing. I'm like,
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 2: just get in the fucking gym.
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 1: Dude, he looks like all of the Lion King in
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 1: one person. He does.
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 2: In a respectable way. Very intimidating. And Kat, I don't
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 2: want to leave Kat Timpout. She's fucking hilarious. It's a
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 2: great show. So anyway, I do that and I go
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 2: on the road. A lot of those, fans don't know
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 2: me except from that show. It's so, I, nothing I
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 2: like more than watching the joy just drain from their
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 2: face when they realize who they paid to see. But I,
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 2: you know, more people, I guess now are more comfortable
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 2: being themselves. Cause you also, it's, it's like, you know,
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 2: I mean, I was, when I was a kid, I was,
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 2: I'm older than you. So in the seventies, I got
• 1:06:06
  Speaker 2: called a, I get all the time. I got beaten
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 2: up and, chased by older kids for doing little sexual
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 2: things with boys. Um, the word gets out, like he's
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 2: a f * * * it. Like it was nasty.
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 2: So it's nice that people aren't being treated that way anymore.
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 2: I didn't know that you had to had that kind
• 1:06:22
  Speaker 2: of stuff happen.
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 1: And while I, I think kids got called that, like
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 1: I certainly got called shit just for being like being
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 1: smart in a neighborhood where it was uncomfortable to know shit.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 2: Um, you know, like, uh, I wish it was for
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 2: that reason, but no, that's not why they called me that.
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 2: I was nose deep on a belly button. I earned it. Hey,
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 2: some people call it penis.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 1: Some people call it long pussy, you know, that's a
• 1:06:49
  Speaker 1: new term for it.
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 2: A long pussy. Like, let's just say she's got a
• 1:06:52
  Speaker 2: long pussy, you know?
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 1: But, dude, yeah, people are such perverts now.
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 2: Who even?
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: But then also it is crazy because there has been
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 1: this energy that we've all been following this, like, astute
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 1: level of our government. But then now you realize, oh,
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 1: half these guys are damn pedophiles running around, skeeting on fucking,
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 1: you know, kids off the coast of fucking wherever.
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 2: It's like, what's going on? That's why I don't believe
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 2: any of it. Like, they're talking about the marriage and
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 2: the sanctity of marriage, and then you find out that
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 2: person's divorced. It's like, man, I don't want to hear
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 2: you weigh in.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 4: I know.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 2: If you're divorced, shut the fuck up about who can
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 2: get married because you didn't do it right. Like, you
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 2: know what I mean? Like, I don't believe any of it.
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 2: It's just like I don't believe progressives when they're talking about,
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 2: you know, being so pious and the purity checks they
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 2: put everyone through. It's like, you're full of shit too.
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 2: All your friends are white. Shut up. Yeah. Like, you
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 2: know what I mean? I don't believe any of them. Oh,
• 1:07:43
  Speaker 2: I hate that shit.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 1: When people are saying that have never lived in the
• 1:07:46
  Speaker 1: South of how things should be in the South, fuck you.
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 2: Calm down. Live in our neighborhoods for a little bit.
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 2: See what the shit is like, you know?
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It's the same sometimes with the border stuff. I
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: don't know what it's like to live on the border
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 1: in Brownsville, Texas. I don't know what people's lives are
• 1:07:59
  Speaker 1: like right there. I don't know the fears people have
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 1: when they put their kids to sleep at night. I
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 1: don't know the fears people have who are trying to
• 1:08:05
  Speaker 1: come over, who are trying to give their kids a
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 1: place where they can go to sleep at night. Like,
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 1: I don't know what that's like. So- I have thoughts
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 1: about it sometimes, but to really be so definitive and shit,
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 1: it's crazy to me.
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 2: Dealing with the immigration with Nikki, which again, we did
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 2: it legally, and it's a long... The immigration system should
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 2: be sped up. It should be a 24-hour system that's
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 2: always got people working. It's like your life is ticking away,
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 2: and you're waiting, and they're sending paperwork through the U.S. mail.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 1: It's like, Jesus Christ. Which is just a trap. The mail,
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 1: it's basically like handing... A letter to a black guy
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 1: and hoping he takes it where it's supposed to go.
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, just here you go. Please bring that to the government.
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 2: This is the request for evidence. Here it is. When
• 1:08:51
  Speaker 2: there's so much more, it's a government, anything with the
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 2: government is not going to be efficient. So immigration, they
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 2: really should streamline it more and make it and hire
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 2: more people like that. Cause I understand why people hop
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 2: the fence, but I don't agree with it because we
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 2: did it legally. Like, but I'm lucky I could afford
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 2: a lawyer. Like a lot of people can't afford attorneys.
• 1:09:09
  Speaker 2: So I kind of go back and forth with it. Well,
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 2: it's nuanced, you know?
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 1: And people get so upset about the ICE thing, but
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 1: here's what I think people don't understand. We're headed to
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 1: a surveillance state, I believe, in America. Yeah. Like, they're
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 1: doing this, like, Palantir has this new deal. They're the
• 1:09:22
  Speaker 1: same ones that are, like, owning all these drones and
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: operating a lot of these drones in Gaza and stuff.
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 2: They're a company, right, Palantir?
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Allegedly. That are sniping children. I mean, we had
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 1: a doctor, and he said bullets would come straight down it, like,
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 1: from above, like a succinct shot. So that's the same company.
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 1: You won't be able to be in, hypothetically or on paper,
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 1: illegal person in America in two years, I don't think.
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 1: Because the radar will go off. The facial recognition will
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 1: go off. You can't do it. So they're getting all
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 1: the paperwork organized now. They're just taking inventory right now,
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 1: and I know it's painful.
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 2: You're right. The facial recognition. I don't mind it at
• 1:10:00
  Speaker 2: the airport. I know some people won't let them take
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 2: the picture, but I show up at the airport sometimes,
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 2: and they just take a picture of my fucking... My
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 2: stupid face and I just walk through. I love it.
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 2: Anything that makes my life easier. And I know there's
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 2: so many civil libertarians that come tell me to go
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: fuck myself. You're right. Fine. I don't care. I mean,
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 2: I'm 57. I just like fucking going on a plane fast. Yeah.
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 1: Oh, I wish things were different a lot of times,
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 1: but also here we are, right? It's like, I can
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 1: wish things were different. I can romanticize that we're still
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 1: before nine 11, but that's not where we are right now.
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 1: We're in this fucking place. But I believe that's why
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 1: all the stuff with ice. So people sometimes are still like,
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 1: they shouldn't be doing.
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 1: I understand people have different feelings, but there's no other
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 1: way to get to where we're headed by them getting
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 1: everybody on the books.
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 2: And I would like to get people like criminals. Once
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 2: you commit a crime, Get out. Or hang. I'm fine
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 2: with hangings. I'm fine with executions. For some people, yeah.
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 2: Not everybody. No, no, no. But those who really misbehave. Yeah. Although,
• 1:11:01
  Speaker 2: it's funny. I've turned against the death penalty. Have you?
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 2: But not. They always say it's cruel and unusual punishment.
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 2: There's a line in An Injustice Roll where he's talking
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 2: about something. He goes, in theory, it's great. But in practice,
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 2: it sucks. Mm-hmm. I think in theory the death penalty
• 1:11:15
  Speaker 2: is allowable. Like I don't think it's cruel and unusual.
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 2: I think people who hurt children and kill children, I'm
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 2: all for their fucking heads being mushed between two giant
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 2: pieces of metal. I just don't trust the system enough
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 2: and I don't trust prosecutors enough to back off. Like
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 2: there's so many times that they care more about the
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 2: record of the office than they do the actual truth.
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 2: Good point. So that's the only reason that's turned against it.
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 2: It's nothing to do with it being, I think it's
• 1:11:41
  Speaker 2: a perfectly allowable thing thing, but our system isn't perfect.
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 2: That's a good point. Do you know what I mean?
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 1: It's like when a coach runs up the score at
• 1:11:48
  Speaker 1: the end of the game, like, how do you know
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 1: that that, that prosecutor's office isn't just trying to run
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 1: up the score because maybe they're trying to make their
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 1: office look better with so many deals and they're going
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 1: to sell to a bigger company. Yeah.
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 2: You just never know. That's a great point. And they
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 2: don't want to pay lawsuits. Um, so there's, I just
• 1:12:03
  Speaker 2: don't trust the integrity of the people who will look
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 2: bad if it's overturned. Yeah. Um, and you look back,
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 2: there's enough prosecutorial misconduct that We like, ah, not technicality shit.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 2: Not where a guy had bloody underpants in his fucking house,
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 2: but the search warrant had the wrong date on it.
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 2: Like I'm not talking about technical shit, but there are
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 2: people who legitimately didn't commit the crime. And then you
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 2: see like evidence that wasn't given to their attorneys. Like, yeah,
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 2: it happens a lot. I just can't get around a
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 2: lot of poor people too much more than rich people.
• 1:12:35
  Speaker 2: That's a good point too. They like, so if everyone
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 2: got the same level of legal representation, it's not what
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 2: happens though. Yeah, and I don't think it's racial. I
• 1:12:42
  Speaker 2: think it's money. If you have enough money for great lawyers,
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 2: you have enough money for great lawyers. But if you don't,
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 2: you get some guy that's overworked who's doing it because
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 2: he has to do it pro bono. You're not going
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 2: to get the level of experts and all these people
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 2: that can refute evidence. So whatever. That's how I feel
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 2: about it. But I do think that emotionally I agree
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 2: with it. I get why people want to cut throats.
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 1: What's also, it starts to, you start to think, is
• 1:13:04
  Speaker 1: there bad DNA in the universe?
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 2: Sure, you're looking at it. Yeah.
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 1: This is a fucking, this is a fucking Dahmer's Petri
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 1: dish over here.
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, there's five foot six of fucking bad DNA.
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 1: Did you guys ever get to, did you guys ever
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 1: get to interview O.J.
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 2: Simp? Did you guys ever interview a murderer? Did we ever... Um,
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 2: I don't, I don't know if he ever, I've interviewed
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 2: Frank Lucas, uh, who was in, uh, who was the,
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 2: the American gangster that Denzel played him. Uh, but there's
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 2: a moment where he went up and shot somebody. So
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 2: he might qualify. Uh, I'm dying to interview Sammy the bull.
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 2: I'm dying to talk to him. Cause I, I, this
• 1:13:49
  Speaker 2: podcast is fascinating. Uh, you know who, one of the
• 1:13:52
  Speaker 2: best guys we ever talked to was, it was this
• 1:13:54
  Speaker 2: giant cop from Milwaukee. His name was something. Kennedy. He
• 1:13:58
  Speaker 2: was six foot seven and he was the cop who
• 1:14:02
  Speaker 2: debriefed Jeffrey Dahmer when they arrested Dahmer and they brought
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 2: Dahmer to the station house. He's the cop, the detective
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 2: that Dahmer first talked to. And he said at first
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 2: he didn't believe him because he was like, yeah, I
• 1:14:13
  Speaker 2: killed all these people. And then he said he got
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 2: a call from the scene and like, yeah, with the refrigerator,
• 1:14:18
  Speaker 2: we found heads. And then he had to go back
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 2: over it. Yeah. Patrick Kennedy. Patrick Kennedy, yeah. He died, unfortunately.
• 1:14:25
  Speaker 2: He looks young. He was a giant six foot seven
• 1:14:29
  Speaker 2: beast of a man. Very nice guy. And he admitted
• 1:14:33
  Speaker 2: that when Dahmer died, he got emotional because he had
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 2: gotten to know him. And he goes, he kind of
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 2: got a little bit, he cried when Jeffrey Dahmer was
• 1:14:40
  Speaker 2: killed because he was a bad guy, but he's still,
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 2: you know, whatever. When you know someone, you know them.
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 2: But a murderer, that's a good question. I don't know.
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 2: but never OJ huh never talked to OJ I corresponded
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 2: with him once I sent him a DM trying to
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 2: get him on the radio show and he did respond
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 2: to me but we never got him on this was
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 2: after he got out of jail for the Vegas thing.
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 1: My buddy has a story where they were in New
• 1:15:07
  Speaker 1: York one night and they were doing some cocaine and
• 1:15:10
  Speaker 1: this was after the murders and somebody was like oh
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 1: I don't have a key on me and OJ pulled
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 1: a knife out of his jacket and they did it
• 1:15:18
  Speaker 1: off of the knife.
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 2: He jimmied the lock? No, they just. Oh, the coke.
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 2: The coke.
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 1: They were doing the cocaine, and they pulled the knife out,
• 1:15:24
  Speaker 1: and they did the, and they were all looking at
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 1: him like it was fucking crazy that he would do that.
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 2: Why would you carry that? And the only thing crazier
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 2: than that is me acting like someone's aunt. What, they
• 1:15:35
  Speaker 2: couldn't get in the house? What an asshole. How did
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 2: I miss the point of that? I apologize. I'm stupid.
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 2: I'm a stupid man. You're talking about doing coke, and
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 2: I'm like, what, did they jimmied the lock? Oh, fucking
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 2: blithering old idiots. I'm an old man. Um, yeah, that's a,
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 2: that's a very bizarre. Maybe OJ had to at that
• 1:15:53
  Speaker 2: point though, because he, you know, people had such strong
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 2: feelings about that. Maybe he was afraid somebody was going
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 2: to jump out and take a shot at him or, or,
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 2: or attack him. I never met him. Yeah.
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 1: Uh, I, I feel like we had a chance to
• 1:16:05
  Speaker 1: meet him when he was doing podcasts and he was
• 1:16:06
  Speaker 1: getting paid for them for a while. Yeah.
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 2: And we didn't buy it. We didn't go into that.
• 1:16:11
  Speaker 2: I would love to, I met Kevorkian once, but, uh,
• 1:16:14
  Speaker 2: Ron Bennington, I think interviewed him. And he was there,
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 2: so I took a picture with Dr. Kevorkian, but I
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 2: would love to have gotten to talk to him, but
• 1:16:20
  Speaker 2: I never got to talk to him, unfortunately. Some of them,
• 1:16:22
  Speaker 2: he's just like, fuck. Did you guys have Trump on
• 1:16:24
  Speaker 2: your show sometimes? He called in a couple of times.
• 1:16:28
  Speaker 2: Matt and I, for UFC Unfiltered, interviewed Trump. It was
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 2: before he got the nomination. We knew he was going
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 2: to get it, but it was like Biden was president,
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 2: and they reached out to us. They're like, do you
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 2: want to interview President Trump? We're like, yeah. So we
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 2: went to Vegas and we did it in the Trump Hotel.
• 1:16:49
  Speaker 2: And he was really great. It was a sports interview.
• 1:16:51
  Speaker 2: Because Dana's like, I don't want this to be politics.
• 1:16:54
  Speaker 2: This is not a political show. We talked to him
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 2: for about 40 minutes. About boxing and stuff? Boxing, MMA.
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 2: Because Trump was a great friend to the UFC. 100%.
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 2: He was a tremendous asset to the UFC long before
• 1:17:07
  Speaker 2: they had what they have now. Dana speaks about that
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 2: a lot. His brain, dude, his brain, whether people love
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 2: him politically or not doesn't matter. I sat in the
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 2: room with him. His fucking brain was really sharp. People
• 1:17:19
  Speaker 2: thought we had cue cards set up because his answers
• 1:17:22
  Speaker 2: were so on the money and he remembered every fighter
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 2: and he remembered every fight. And people are like, these
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 2: guys had cue cards set up. And he was very sharp.
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 2: And he was nice to my wife when I introduced him.
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 2: So I had a great time talking to him.
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 2: You can't not. Anybody who wins the presidency has some
• 1:17:38
  Speaker 2: form of charisma. Oh, yeah.
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 1: I'm always people are like, you had that. Dude, what
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 1: are you talking about? Do you know the street I
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 1: grew up on? If I did an interview, a president
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 1: and I had a chance. Yeah. If I didn't sit
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 1: with people, whether I agree with them or don't agree
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 1: with them, like, How the fuck am I supposed to
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 1: know anything about them or get any feeling as a
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 1: human as to what they may or may not be
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 1: like or how they operate? It's like I would sit
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 1: down with the devil probably and at least see if
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 1: I could get a feel for some of his future plans.
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 2: Absolutely. And then just I would keep looking at his
• 1:18:08
  Speaker 2: little cloven feet. Where do you get your shoes from, Dev?
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 2: But yeah, who wouldn't want to sit with the president?
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 2: And he was nice. I would show the same respect
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 2: to Biden or Kamala. Any of them I talk to,
• 1:18:21
  Speaker 2: I would be respectful to and have a nice conversation with.
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 2: There's this weird line where people are like, how could
• 1:18:26
  Speaker 2: you talk to Trump? Shut up.
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah. You shut the fuck up. You don't have the
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 1: chance to talk to any of these people. And I
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 1: don't mean that in a negative way, but fuck you.
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I absolutely agree with whoever wants to interview somebody.
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 2: Why should just the quote-unquote press have access to people?
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 2: If they're willing to come on and talk, why wouldn't
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 2: you talk to me? It's insane. Some of those guys
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 2: interviewed Netanyahu and I did not like that though. Oh,
• 1:18:49
  Speaker 2: so you had that kind of feeling? Yep, I'm just
• 1:18:51
  Speaker 2: thinking that out loud.
• 1:18:52
  Speaker 1: So I guess there's a part of me that doesn't
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 1: really feel that way.
• 1:18:55
  Speaker 2: But if you didn't, there's a difference between not liking
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 2: something and vocally. I wouldn't interview him. You would not to.
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 2: Maybe you could interview him and ask him tough questions.
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 1: I think I would probably try to ask him stuff
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 1: that really means something to me.
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 2: Sure. And that's fair. Like that, they know that if
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 2: you're Netanyahu or you're Trump or you're Biden, you know
• 1:19:14
  Speaker 2: that when you go into an interview, part of it
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 2: might be this guy asking you questions from a belief
• 1:19:20
  Speaker 2: system that is not yours. So you might hear things
• 1:19:22
  Speaker 2: you don't like. But yeah, that'd be the best thing
• 1:19:25
  Speaker 2: to do is to interview him and ask him shit
• 1:19:26
  Speaker 2: that he might not want to answer, but that you
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 2: want to know the answer to. Do you think that's
• 1:19:30
  Speaker 2: better than not interviewing somebody? It's personal preference. I mean,
• 1:19:32
  Speaker 2: I don't think you're wrong to not want to talk
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 2: to somebody. I think if you go, nah, I'd rather not.
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 2: I think that's perfectly fair. Um, but I think that
• 1:19:42
  Speaker 2: part of the thing too, is when you're sitting in
• 1:19:46
  Speaker 2: the room with somebody, no matter who they are, even
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 2: if you hate them, there is sometimes something about them
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 2: that you connect to and like, and it becomes harder
• 1:19:54
  Speaker 2: to hate them. Again, it doesn't have to be a politician.
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 2: I've met people like Lauren Bobart. I don't, I don't
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 2: know her. I don't agree with her politics. And I
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 2: met her once and she was very nice. Kid rocks girl.
• 1:20:05
  Speaker 2: Not his girlfriend. Is it? I don't know. I met
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 2: her at, she was at a kill Tony event. But
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 2: she was so nice and I enjoyed chatting with her.
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 2: And it's like, even if I don't agree with her,
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 2: I don't have the same feelings about her that are bad. Like,
• 1:20:17
  Speaker 2: you know what I mean? Cause I've met her and
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 2: she was nice. Oh, for sure. It's harder for me
• 1:20:20
  Speaker 2: to look at her like just this person who's got
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 2: no real feelings and no real connection to anything. Oh yeah.
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 2: She got them bumpers on her too. She is quite attractive. Yeah. Yeah.
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 2: She looks great. Um, I got zero vibes off her,
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 2: but I mean, she was, you know, as I shouldn't have. Yeah.
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 2: It doesn't matter. But she was nice. So when you
• 1:20:38
  Speaker 2: meet somebody, sometimes you think you know what they're going
• 1:20:41
  Speaker 2: to be like and they wind up impressing you and
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 2: you're like, ugh, it's harder for me to dislike that.
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 2: But all that, that's such a controversial issue. I'm not
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 2: saying you would like the guy, but you know what
• 1:20:52
  Speaker 2: I mean? Sitting across from him, you may feel differently
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 2: or you may hate him more. Right.
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, there is something about sitting across from somebody or
• 1:20:59
  Speaker 1: at least sitting across from them. There is some connection
• 1:21:02
  Speaker 1: of like spatial energy of, of something like that of like,
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 1: cause you, I think it is human to want to
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 1: find some commonality with people.
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 2: You want to find something that, that you, that you
• 1:21:12
  Speaker 2: kind of like, it's funny. We were interviewing one time,
• 1:21:15
  Speaker 2: Ben Kingsley. And I remember talking to him. Who is he?
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 2: He was, uh, in like, he was in the, he's just,
• 1:21:20
  Speaker 2: he's an actor. He was in, I think, uh, did
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 2: he play Gandhi? He might've played Gandhi. He's been in everything.
• 1:21:24
  Speaker 2: I mean, he's Kingsley. Yeah, he's been... Did he play Gandhi?
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 2: I could be... He's a very famous actor. He had
• 1:21:30
  Speaker 2: a great... Yeah, he was Gandhi. Wow. He's been around for...
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 2: I was thinking of Peter Billingsley. That's who I'm thinking of.
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 2: Who's Peter Billingsley? I know that name, too.
• 1:21:38
  Speaker 1: He is the guy who kissed that pipe and he
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 1: got his tongue stuck on it.
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 2: Oh, in the... Christmas story. Yes, yes. But we were
• 1:21:49
  Speaker 2: just talking to Ben Kingsley. Okay, so Ben Kingsley. No, no, no.
• 1:21:51
  Speaker 2: I just remember talking to him and he was answering me.
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 2: And I remember thinking... In any other circumstance, this guy
• 1:21:57
  Speaker 2: wouldn't fucking spit on me. Like he would never talk
• 1:22:01
  Speaker 2: to me at a party or at a premiere. But
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 2: in this weird setting, I'm like, so what about, and
• 1:22:07
  Speaker 2: he's like, well, and he's like giving a real answer.
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 2: And it's such an odd thing interviewing somebody like people
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 2: that normally would never acknowledge you now have to listen
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 2: to you and actually think about how to answer your question.
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 2: It's a weird psychology. And I remember that just struck
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 2: me when I was talking to him. Cause our worlds
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 2: are so different. Like he would never talk to me
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 2: in real life. Got it. And I've never talked to
• 1:22:29
  Speaker 2: him again. Right. I see what you're saying. I can't
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 2: think of someone I wouldn't interview, but maybe if it
• 1:22:33
  Speaker 2: was brought up in front of me, I might say no. Yeah.
• 1:22:35
  Speaker 2: I can't think of anyone.
• 1:22:36
  Speaker 1: I think I would just, I start to realize that
• 1:22:37
  Speaker 1: some people will just use you. They, and you don't
• 1:22:40
  Speaker 1: realize it. Like I used to think like everybody just
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 1: wants to come and they want to have a conversation
• 1:22:43
  Speaker 1: and stuff. You can learn stuff about each other. Sure.
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 1: But then some people just want to use, like they'll
• 1:22:47
  Speaker 1: use you to get their message out there. And I
• 1:22:50
  Speaker 1: think I didn't realize sometimes that that's how things work. Yes.
• 1:22:53
  Speaker 1: And so I think I've noticed that more over time.
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 1: So maybe that would keep me out of certain conversations,
• 1:22:58
  Speaker 1: you know? It depends on- And maybe like with Yahoo.
• 1:23:00
  Speaker 2: You're afraid that he would just use you to message?
• 1:23:03
  Speaker 1: I feel like his group is so calculated that they
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 1: would be able to do it in a way that
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 1: I wouldn't even maybe see it, you know?
• 1:23:10
  Speaker 2: I don't know. I think that all- Anyone in public life,
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 2: especially in like official politicians, congressmen, they all do this
• 1:23:19
  Speaker 2: thing where they have talking points and they're very, they're
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 2: masters at veering back to a talking point. And when
• 1:23:27
  Speaker 2: they're bad at it, we hate them. Sometimes they're good
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 2: at it and you don't realize they're doing it. But
• 1:23:32
  Speaker 2: most times we're savvy enough to go, what are you
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 2: fucking to like, look, you know, you'll be like, well,
• 1:23:36
  Speaker 2: what about that thing where they did find the dead
• 1:23:38
  Speaker 2: prostitute in your closet? No, I know. But the thing
• 1:23:40
  Speaker 2: with the economy is, and they're right back to talking
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 2: about their, and you're like, you didn't answer the fucking question.
• 1:23:44
  Speaker 2: That's why so many of them are so hateable. Cause
• 1:23:46
  Speaker 2: I think we've gotten a little bit better at seeing
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 2: it now for sure. When they're back on their talking points. Yeah. Um,
• 1:23:53
  Speaker 2: And that's why I love the interview that we did
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 2: with Trump because it was just– it really was just
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 2: a conversation about sports. And I would love to– I
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 2: wish I had told him how much I love that
• 1:24:03
  Speaker 2: he talked to Kim Jong-un. I didn't get to say
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 2: that to him. I wish I had. I just forgot afterwards.
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 2: But we were saying our goodbyes and he was taking
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 2: pictures of everybody. And I wish I had told him.
• 1:24:12
  Speaker 2: Like I love that he went to North Korea and tried.
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 2: Like I love that he made an effort with that
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 2: little short weird guy. It'd be cool, huh? You think
• 1:24:19
  Speaker 2: Oon is cool or what? If you're a Chicago Bull, yeah. Like,
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 2: if you played for the Bulls, he's awesome. Right. You know,
• 1:24:26
  Speaker 2: if your uncle was in the military and made a
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 2: questionable decision, you're executed. I imagine there's a downside to it.
• 1:24:33
  Speaker 2: Depends on who you are. Yeah, dude, he looks fucking cool, dude.
• 1:24:38
  Speaker 2: He looks interesting to be... Like, here's what I would
• 1:24:40
  Speaker 2: think with him. I would be afraid that I'd be
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 2: in North Korea and there's a language barrier and he
• 1:24:45
  Speaker 2: would want to toast... with alcohol and I would try
• 1:24:48
  Speaker 2: to tell him like, I'm an alcoholic, so I'd have
• 1:24:50
  Speaker 2: to refuse the drink. And that would start a whole,
• 1:24:53
  Speaker 2: you insulted the leader thing.
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:24:55
  Speaker 2: You wouldn't know.
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 1: I think sometimes whenever you insulted them, I think that
• 1:24:58
  Speaker 1: would be kind of, yeah. Something like that could be
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 1: really mis, miscued or something.
• 1:25:02
  Speaker 2: You know, fascinates me. The Sultan of Brunei. Really? Who
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 2: owns like the Beverly Hilton. Like that's like, that's a
• 1:25:06
  Speaker 2: guy who lives there. That, that'd be a fun guy
• 1:25:09
  Speaker 2: to know. Cause he, I might go to Dubai, Abu
• 1:25:12
  Speaker 2: Dhabi for, UFC in October. Who's fighting, Joe? Or November.
• 1:25:17
  Speaker 2: I don't know what the card is yet. I see
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 2: you at all the events. Even if I'm home watching,
• 1:25:20
  Speaker 2: I'm on the road. They always pan to you. You're
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 2: always there early. I love it in there. I love
• 1:25:23
  Speaker 2: that you're always there early, yeah.
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 1: Well, I just get to see, like, you know, Chris
• 1:25:26
  Speaker 1: Weidman was fighting on his retirement fight, I think was
• 1:25:28
  Speaker 1: fighting on the, I don't know if it was the
• 1:25:30
  Speaker 1: main card. It might have even been the first fight
• 1:25:32
  Speaker 1: of the main card or something. But, like, I mean,
• 1:25:34
  Speaker 1: there's just so many great fights. I just can't believe
• 1:25:36
  Speaker 1: that people aren't there. These are, like, guys that are
• 1:25:38
  Speaker 1: going in there and women that are giving it there.
• 1:25:41
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's like, where are you?
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 2: I wish I scheduled better because they just announced, uh,
• 1:25:47
  Speaker 2: I think Jack Della, Madalena and Makachev at the, uh, uh,
• 1:25:51
  Speaker 2: in the garden in November. And I immediately look at
• 1:25:54
  Speaker 2: my schedule. I'm in Oregon. I'm like nothing against Oregon. No,
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 2: but it's just hurts.
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 2: I probably didn't even say it right. Yeah. Oregon or
• 1:26:01
  Speaker 2: the fuck you dumb state is I'm coming.
• 1:26:04
  Speaker 1: What, oh, you know what one of my favorite conversations
• 1:26:06
  Speaker 1: was that I ever had? Honestly, it was with Louie.
• 1:26:08
  Speaker 1: It was whenever we chose, because we didn't know each
• 1:26:10
  Speaker 1: other at all.
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 2: Right, right.
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 1: And we just laughed and got to know each other.
• 1:26:14
  Speaker 1: And then after that, we became closer, but. that was
• 1:26:17
  Speaker 1: one of my favorite podcasts ever.
• 1:26:19
  Speaker 2: Probably. He loves you. And it's funny. Your name came
• 1:26:21
  Speaker 2: up while we were traveling and he's like, he's a
• 1:26:24
  Speaker 2: really great guy. He just raved about you. I didn't
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 2: know that he, you were going to be talking to
• 1:26:27
  Speaker 2: him or I was going to be even, uh, you
• 1:26:29
  Speaker 2: were going to be seeing him, uh, this week. It
• 1:26:31
  Speaker 2: was a nice surprise. Uh, yeah, he's a special guy.
• 1:26:35
  Speaker 1: He is.
• 1:26:35
  Speaker 2: And he's, uh, it'd be hard to be him.
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 1: I feel like, cause he has so many thoughts and
• 1:26:39
  Speaker 1: he's so able to like, look around the corner of
• 1:26:41
  Speaker 1: thoughts and possibilities. Like, I mean, really to like, like, Fuck,
• 1:26:47
  Speaker 1: it almost feels like it'd be scary to be him.
• 1:26:49
  Speaker 2: Does that make any sense? No, 100%, because his brain
• 1:26:53
  Speaker 2: operates so well. Like, it's such an interesting and unique brain.
• 1:26:57
  Speaker 2: Like he helped me fix a joke that I wound
• 1:26:58
  Speaker 2: up doing in the special. He saw me doing it
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 2: at the cellar. He's like, you might want to say
• 1:27:02
  Speaker 2: it like this. And I did and it fixed it.
• 1:27:04
  Speaker 2: It was better. Like, so when you have a guy
• 1:27:06
  Speaker 2: like that, like he just sees something and he lasers
• 1:27:08
  Speaker 2: in on it. And the material is so good. His
• 1:27:12
  Speaker 2: new hour is so good. And he's changing the order
• 1:27:15
  Speaker 2: every night, trying this, trying that. You know, yeah, he's,
• 1:27:21
  Speaker 2: he's brilliant, man. That word is overused on people, but
• 1:27:23
  Speaker 2: he truly is brilliant.
• 1:27:25
  Speaker 1: Getting your sweat on might seem like hard work, but
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• 1:27:35
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• 1:27:43
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• 1:27:47
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• 1:27:52
  Speaker 2: Why sauna?
• 1:27:53
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• 1:27:57
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• 1:28:39
  Speaker 2: Slash t-h-e-o.
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 1: I think well oh did you grow you grew up
• 1:28:46
  Speaker 1: in new jersey right i did central jersey did you
• 1:28:48
  Speaker 1: get to ever meet james j braddock or not who's
• 1:28:50
  Speaker 1: james j braddock the cinderella man never met him where's
• 1:28:54
  Speaker 1: he from in jersey we may miss bergen No, but
• 1:28:56
  Speaker 1: that's not that far from me.
• 1:28:59
  Speaker 2: Joey Diaz used to shovel his driveway. Is he dead
• 1:29:02
  Speaker 2: or alive? Joey's alive, but this guy's dead. No, I
• 1:29:04
  Speaker 2: know Joey. Oh, yeah. James Earl Braddock is dead. Joey's alive.
• 1:29:07
  Speaker 2: I mean, look, you gotta look at him. But if
• 1:29:11
  Speaker 2: I didn't know if Joey Diaz was, that would be
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 2: sucked if he was dead. I was like, oh, sorry,
• 1:29:14
  Speaker 2: I just talked to him. Yeah, Braddock, dude, that Cinderella
• 1:29:18
  Speaker 2: man's the best. You seen that? Have I seen that?
• 1:29:20
  Speaker 2: I don't think I have. Wow.
• 1:29:22
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 1:29:23
  Speaker 2: I don't think I have. No, and I was six
• 1:29:25
  Speaker 2: when he died. I was born in 68. Oh, yeah.
• 1:29:27
  Speaker 1: I didn't realize he died that early. Oh, you and
• 1:29:29
  Speaker 1: Nicky got to watch. Put on some condoms and watch
• 1:29:31
  Speaker 1: this thing, dude.
• 1:29:32
  Speaker 2: Condoms. Forget it. Not before, during, or after our marriage.
• 1:29:35
  Speaker 2: We'll have to use one of those. Boo to those things.
• 1:29:38
  Speaker 1: When did we win it? But, oh, this is my
• 1:29:41
  Speaker 1: favorite movie. I just watched Silver Linings Playbook again. That
• 1:29:44
  Speaker 1: movie's so good. That was very good. Yeah, De Niro
• 1:29:47
  Speaker 1: and Bradley Cooper. I always watch Irish, the Irish Mickey
• 1:29:50
  Speaker 1: Ward movie, The Fighter.
• 1:29:53
  Speaker 2: I don't know if I saw that. Oh, it's so good.
• 1:29:54
  Speaker 2: I think we've interviewed Mickey Ward, though, but I don't
• 1:29:56
  Speaker 2: remember if I... I could see that. Yeah, he was... Yeah,
• 1:29:58
  Speaker 2: he's still alive, right? He's out. I don't know what
• 1:30:00
  Speaker 2: he was promoting. UFC guys, by the way, are the
• 1:30:02
  Speaker 2: nicest of all the athletes to interview. So funny. I've interviewed...
• 1:30:06
  Speaker 2: Boxers tend to be a little standoffish, a little too
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 2: cool for the room. You keep the sunglasses on. But
• 1:30:12
  Speaker 2: UFC fighters, there's a humility to them. And Rogan said
• 1:30:15
  Speaker 2: it's because, like, they get tapped a lot in the gym.
• 1:30:17
  Speaker 2: When you're training, you're being submitted and you're submitting. So
• 1:30:20
  Speaker 2: there's a humility there that you keep. Because there's always
• 1:30:23
  Speaker 2: somebody kind of getting the better of you. And maybe
• 1:30:25
  Speaker 2: that's what it is. I don't know. But I like
• 1:30:27
  Speaker 2: those guys the best. I think that makes sense. Oh, yes.
• 1:30:29
  Speaker 1: Getting to be around some of those guys. Dude, I
• 1:30:31
  Speaker 1: accidentally called one of the fighters, Steepin' Mule Chicken.
• 1:30:36
  Speaker 2: It was not him. Oh, no. Is it a woman?
• 1:30:40
  Speaker 1: I asked two UFC employees. I was like, is that Steepin'? Like, yes,
• 1:30:44
  Speaker 1: that's him. And I went over to say, and it wasn't.
• 1:30:46
  Speaker 1: It was John Dracovic.
• 1:30:48
  Speaker 2: John Dracovic. Jan Blachowicz? Jan Blachowicz, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:30:54
  Speaker 2: And it was just fucking scary for a minute. Would
• 1:30:58
  Speaker 2: you say, hey, Stipe? Yeah. I was like, hey, how's
• 1:31:00
  Speaker 2: the retirement going?
• 1:31:02
  Speaker 1: And I think he didn't want to, you know, if
• 1:31:03
  Speaker 1: a guy's not retired, he probably wouldn't want to hear that.
• 1:31:06
  Speaker 1: And I kind of like tickled him a little because
• 1:31:08
  Speaker 1: I know Stipe a little. And it was just fucking tough. But,
• 1:31:12
  Speaker 1: you know, you win some, you lose some. He did
• 1:31:14
  Speaker 1: give me a nice look later on that made me
• 1:31:15
  Speaker 1: feel a little bit better. But just you got to
• 1:31:17
  Speaker 1: be careful.
• 1:31:18
  Speaker 2: Like, yeah, it's funny.
• 1:31:19
  Speaker 1: Like, it's almost like whenever you get to like, you're
• 1:31:22
  Speaker 1: like around a pit bull for a little while at
• 1:31:24
  Speaker 1: a party.
• 1:31:24
  Speaker 2: Like, oh, now we're buddies.
• 1:31:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:31:26
  Speaker 2: You just want to be a little careful sometimes around
• 1:31:28
  Speaker 2: those guys. You want to be a little bit careful
• 1:31:30
  Speaker 2: because you never know what past trauma you remind them
• 1:31:34
  Speaker 2: of in a minute when you do something. I was
• 1:31:37
  Speaker 2: in L.A. one time many years ago, and I walked up,
• 1:31:40
  Speaker 2: and it was Patrick Swayze was coming out of a restaurant.
• 1:31:43
  Speaker 2: So I walked up. Was he handsome? Very. And I go, dude,
• 1:31:47
  Speaker 2: I love you. Can we take a picture? And I'm like,
• 1:31:49
  Speaker 2: I'm such a fan, Patrick. And he goes, I'm not Patrick.
• 1:31:55
  Speaker 2: And it was David Keith. And he was with a date.
• 1:31:59
  Speaker 3: Whoa.
• 1:32:01
  Speaker 2: That was embarrassing. That was fucking embarrassing. I thought it
• 1:32:05
  Speaker 2: was Swayze. It wasn't. Oh, that is heavy. I could
• 1:32:09
  Speaker 2: see that a little bit. That was years ago. That
• 1:32:11
  Speaker 2: looks like Robert Wool, actually. Oh, did I fuck up?
• 1:32:14
  Speaker 2: I just got nervous. It was Keith David, you mean? Oh,
• 1:32:17
  Speaker 2: David Keith. One's black, one's white. Oh, David Keith. Sorry,
• 1:32:20
  Speaker 2: did I say Keith David? Click on Keith David. Keith
• 1:32:23
  Speaker 2: David's black. If it was him... Yeah, he was in Platoon. Mr.
• 1:32:26
  Speaker 1: Swayze?
• 1:32:26
  Speaker 2: He wasn't white. Yeah, no, no. This guy is fucking
• 1:32:34
  Speaker 2: not doing well. David Keith is white. He was in
• 1:32:36
  Speaker 2: An Officer and a Gentleman. David Keith is a great actor.
• 1:32:38
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah.
• 1:32:39
  Speaker 2: I just panicked. Oh, for sure. I was just nervous.
• 1:32:41
  Speaker 2: Keith David I met in an airport one time in LAX.
• 1:32:44
  Speaker 2: The coolest guy in history. He was wearing like a
• 1:32:46
  Speaker 2: completely white suit and white coat with a fucking white hat.
• 1:32:50
  Speaker 2: That guy is just awesome. Yeah. He was also in
• 1:32:52
  Speaker 2: that– That Michael Douglas, what was the movie? Platoon? No. Spartacus?
• 1:32:58
  Speaker 2: It was a drug movie where the girl, Requiem for
• 1:33:03
  Speaker 2: a Dream, I think he was in. Oh, that movie
• 1:33:05
  Speaker 2: was interesting.
• 1:33:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:33:07
  Speaker 2: I think Jared Leto was in that. And he was really,
• 1:33:10
  Speaker 2: Keith David is tremendous, but in Platoon- You know. Yeah,
• 1:33:13
  Speaker 2: that was a different time. Yeah. That was embarrassing. I
• 1:33:16
  Speaker 2: relate to that. It's humiliating. Yeah, I'm trying to think.
• 1:33:18
  Speaker 1: I know there's been something like that that I've had,
• 1:33:20
  Speaker 1: but I think sometimes I just can't, I think sometimes
• 1:33:22
  Speaker 1: my brain just shuts down.
• 1:33:23
  Speaker 2: Do you ever panic around people like that? Like where,
• 1:33:25
  Speaker 2: like my brain is not working and I'm just like
• 1:33:27
  Speaker 2: lost and I'm like, I know I should be more comfortable,
• 1:33:30
  Speaker 2: but they're famous or whatever it is.
• 1:33:31
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I met Johnny Depp came to the comedy
• 1:33:33
  Speaker 1: store one night and it's still like a moment of
• 1:33:35
  Speaker 1: lore because it was like, uh, Doug Stanhope brought him.
• 1:33:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:33:39
  Speaker 1: And they were in the green room at the, in
• 1:33:40
  Speaker 1: the main room and everybody was in there and I
• 1:33:43
  Speaker 1: was like, I got there and they're like, don't tell
• 1:33:45
  Speaker 1: anybody Johnny Depp's here. And I knew when they were
• 1:33:47
  Speaker 1: telling me, I was like, they've told everybody if they're
• 1:33:49
  Speaker 1: telling me. I go back in there and then all
• 1:33:52
  Speaker 1: you know, like you don't even know who else in
• 1:33:53
  Speaker 1: there was like 50 people in this little room. And John,
• 1:33:56
  Speaker 1: and then like, I got to somehow got to say,
• 1:33:58
  Speaker 1: I said, hello, Mr.
• 1:33:59
  Speaker 2: Johnny Depp.
• 1:34:00
  Speaker 1: And then I had nothing else to say. And it
• 1:34:02
  Speaker 1: was very uncomfortable. And I realized I was just there
• 1:34:05
  Speaker 1: for me kind of. And I just got out of there.
• 1:34:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:34:07
  Speaker 2: It's embarrassing. Cause you want to say something, but sometimes
• 1:34:10
  Speaker 2: a person's famous and I like their work, but I
• 1:34:12
  Speaker 2: don't have anything to say to them. Like, Hey, I
• 1:34:14
  Speaker 2: admire your work. And that's kind of, uh, you know,
• 1:34:18
  Speaker 2: where do you go from there? If you have nothing
• 1:34:20
  Speaker 2: legitimate to say, and I've done that, I've humiliated myself.
• 1:34:26
  Speaker 1: But they got to be used to it too. They're like,
• 1:34:28
  Speaker 1: and some of them will be helpful to you. They'll
• 1:34:29
  Speaker 1: kind of ask you something to fucking put you back
• 1:34:32
  Speaker 1: on your feet, you know, or someone will shake you
• 1:34:34
  Speaker 1: and be like, you're not a son or whatever, you.
• 1:34:36
  Speaker 2: Know, like no one's ever shaken me and said that.
• 1:34:40
  Speaker 2: I've tried to say that in the mirror and I
• 1:34:41
  Speaker 2: just wound up laughing. Jim has a crash test dummy.
• 1:34:51
  Speaker 1: It's like one of those battling dummies, but he just
• 1:34:54
  Speaker 1: uses it to give it uplifting, positive, semi-homosexual, like.
• 1:34:59
  Speaker 2: You're straight, Jim. Now you're not, Jim. Get back in there, Jim.
• 1:35:03
  Speaker 2: You're straight. You can do it. It's not scary. It
• 1:35:06
  Speaker 2: doesn't have teeth. Yeah, no. Here's my Johnny Depp story.
• 1:35:12
  Speaker 2: I got invited to– it was Ozzy's actual 70th birthday party.
• 1:35:18
  Speaker 2: I got to go to that.
• 1:35:19
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 1:35:19
  Speaker 2: In the U.S.? It was at his house in Beverly Hills.
• 1:35:22
  Speaker 2: And it was amazing. It was a lot of great
• 1:35:24
  Speaker 2: people there. And Johnny Depp– uh was walking around and
• 1:35:27
  Speaker 2: i was talking to him and he was very nice
• 1:35:30
  Speaker 2: um and i talked to him three or four different
• 1:35:32
  Speaker 2: times we took a picture and then i uh i
• 1:35:35
  Speaker 2: realized it was a johnny depp impersonator stupid no showbiz
• 1:35:40
  Speaker 2: jim norton like my aunt again i fell for it
• 1:35:43
  Speaker 2: i it was a johnny depp 20 years younger than
• 1:35:46
  Speaker 2: johnny depp by the way and i fucking fell for
• 1:35:49
  Speaker 2: hook line and sinker All night, you're over there. I do,
• 1:35:52
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, Johnny Depp, I got a picture. I've gotten,
• 1:35:54
  Speaker 2: Dice got me on the road years ago. We were
• 1:35:57
  Speaker 2: on the road in like late 90s. He goes, that's
• 1:35:58
  Speaker 2: Charlie Daniels. So I took a picture with this guy.
• 1:36:01
  Speaker 2: It was just some fucking hayseed and a cowboy hat. Oh,
• 1:36:06
  Speaker 2: they got me so good. They got me. One time
• 1:36:09
  Speaker 2: we were in the airport. It was an Opie and
• 1:36:10
  Speaker 2: Anthony trip. We were going somewhere, and one of the
• 1:36:14
  Speaker 2: Jonas Brothers was talking to his dad. They were traveling.
• 1:36:17
  Speaker 2: And I'm not a fan of the Jonas Brothers. And
• 1:36:20
  Speaker 2: I don't know their names. But I'm like, I got it.
• 1:36:23
  Speaker 2: I'll take a picture with them. So I walk over
• 1:36:25
  Speaker 2: and I just start talking to this 15-year-old kid and
• 1:36:28
  Speaker 2: his dad. And I just wanted to take a picture,
• 1:36:31
  Speaker 2: if you don't mind. And I look and they're all laughing.
• 1:36:34
  Speaker 2: And I realize it's just some fucking kid and his dad.
• 1:36:37
  Speaker 2: I creepily approach some 15-year-old. They're sitting in the airport
• 1:36:40
  Speaker 2: eating lunch in some fucking... old blinking pederast looking guy
• 1:36:44
  Speaker 2: wants a photo with this boy. Ice coffee. Oh my God.
• 1:36:48
  Speaker 2: Cold coffee. Edna Faust's head. Is this nothing better than
• 1:36:52
  Speaker 2: her head movements? Oh my God, dude. She looks like
• 1:36:56
  Speaker 2: the cop in Dog Day Afternoon. Keep us off drinks,
• 1:36:59
  Speaker 2: keep us off drinks. But yeah, that was, I've gotten
• 1:37:03
  Speaker 2: got a few times like that, thinking it's a fucking celebrity.
• 1:37:05
  Speaker 2: That's so awesome. It's humiliating. But I deserve it.
• 1:37:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and we all need stuff like that, man. It's
• 1:37:11
  Speaker 1: the stuff like that that just keeps you alive, I
• 1:37:15
  Speaker 1: feel like.
• 1:37:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and when you get one of your friends, and
• 1:37:20
  Speaker 2: I do like the ability to just go like, you're
• 1:37:22
  Speaker 2: an idiot. It's funny. Yeah, to laugh at yourself.
• 1:37:25
  Speaker 1: And what better thing to hit on a kid and
• 1:37:27
  Speaker 1: also realize you're not a pedophile?
• 1:37:29
  Speaker 2: Well, I didn't think he was cute. I just wanted
• 1:37:32
  Speaker 2: a picture. I wasn't hitting on him. I didn't say
• 1:37:35
  Speaker 2: to him, son, if you need to go to the restroom,
• 1:37:36
  Speaker 2: may I escort you? No, I was just trying to
• 1:37:38
  Speaker 2: take a picture while they ate lunch at some fucking
• 1:37:40
  Speaker 2: kiosk at the airport. And the father, they looked at
• 1:37:43
  Speaker 2: me like, what? And I just happened to see Anthony
• 1:37:46
  Speaker 2: and the rest of the guys fucking laughing. And I'm like, yeah, yeah,
• 1:37:50
  Speaker 2: they got me. I'm like, sorry, I just don't want
• 1:37:54
  Speaker 2: to have my camera out. Fucking jerk off. Oh, my God, dude. Yeah.
• 1:37:58
  Speaker 1: Oh, I don't know why that's for some reason just
• 1:38:00
  Speaker 1: so perfect. That was one thing I was nice about
• 1:38:03
  Speaker 1: before social media and everything. Everything was possible. Nobody in
• 1:38:08
  Speaker 1: a moment's notice could be like, that's not them or
• 1:38:09
  Speaker 1: this isn't possible. You could lie to people. But you
• 1:38:12
  Speaker 1: couldn't lie to people. You could make stuff up. There
• 1:38:13
  Speaker 1: was so much room for creativity and possibility in everything
• 1:38:17
  Speaker 1: because everybody didn't have all of the hypothetical answers at
• 1:38:21
  Speaker 1: their will.
• 1:38:22
  Speaker 2: All information. Yeah. I could have just Googled them and
• 1:38:25
  Speaker 2: then seen. I imagine I could have at that point either.
• 1:38:28
  Speaker 2: I was just so... thought it'd be so much fun
• 1:38:31
  Speaker 2: to get a picture with one of the Jonas Brothers. Yeah.
• 1:38:33
  Speaker 2: I get pictures of people I don't give a fuck.
• 1:38:35
  Speaker 2: I stopped doing that now as I'm older, but for
• 1:38:37
  Speaker 2: a long time I did it because it was fun.
• 1:38:39
  Speaker 2: We had so many celebrities coming through your world, too.
• 1:38:41
  Speaker 2: At one point, there were a lot, yeah.
• 1:38:43
  Speaker 1: I mean, that show was crazy. To be in that
• 1:38:45
  Speaker 1: lobby in that big building in New York, especially for
• 1:38:48
  Speaker 1: young comics, you go there and it looks like outer
• 1:38:51
  Speaker 1: space when you get there downstairs the first time if
• 1:38:53
  Speaker 1: you haven't been in there. And it's those glass, like
• 1:38:55
  Speaker 1: something turns green and it opens it up. But first
• 1:38:57
  Speaker 1: you have to go talk to somebody who's usually a
• 1:39:00
  Speaker 1: diversity hire.
• 1:39:01
  Speaker 2: I'm going to say it.
• 1:39:02
  Speaker 1: In a suit over there downstairs and they would call
• 1:39:05
  Speaker 1: up to somebody magically somewhere you would get the thumbs
• 1:39:08
  Speaker 1: up they'd give you a little barcode and now you're
• 1:39:10
  Speaker 1: like the doors open and then bing and it just
• 1:39:14
  Speaker 1: the elevator like almost is like come in here and
• 1:39:16
  Speaker 1: then you and then you go so high till your
• 1:39:19
  Speaker 1: ears pop and you get out and like fucking um
• 1:39:23
  Speaker 1: Evander Holyfield is in the lobby or like Doja Cat
• 1:39:27
  Speaker 1: or fucking Katy Perry everybody's waiting to go into some
• 1:39:30
  Speaker 1: little um, enclave to get their voice out to the world.
• 1:39:33
  Speaker 2: It was crazy. It was crazy. And, and, and Stern
• 1:39:36
  Speaker 2: was right down the hall too. So he would always
• 1:39:37
  Speaker 2: have huge guests. Um, I nailed McCartney coming out of
• 1:39:40
  Speaker 2: his studio one time. I got a picture with McCartney.
• 1:39:42
  Speaker 2: That was a big one. Pele. I got like, I've got,
• 1:39:45
  Speaker 2: if they weren't there for my show, I still would.
• 1:39:47
  Speaker 2: If they're in the lobby, I'm like, it's fair game.
• 1:39:50
  Speaker 2: And usually they would take it, you know, cause you're
• 1:39:52
  Speaker 2: in that, it's kind of a closed environment. Um, but yeah,
• 1:39:55
  Speaker 2: that would, that was one, uh, that was one, uh,
• 1:39:57
  Speaker 2: that's a good shot with us too. I've always hated
• 1:39:59
  Speaker 2: how my dumb neck looks, but, uh, cause I was
• 1:40:03
  Speaker 2: doing it for a selfie and then McCarty goes, let
• 1:40:05
  Speaker 2: my guy do it. So I handed it to his
• 1:40:07
  Speaker 2: security guy. He was actually very nice. And, uh, yeah,
• 1:40:10
  Speaker 2: that's a great shot. A great shot.
• 1:40:12
  Speaker 1: That's a pretty good picture, man. It's very risky handing
• 1:40:14
  Speaker 1: it to someone else, too, because you have no control
• 1:40:16
  Speaker 1: over what they're going to do.
• 1:40:17
  Speaker 2: No control. But because Paul suggested it, I knew the
• 1:40:21
  Speaker 2: guy would do as he was at. Got it. It
• 1:40:23
  Speaker 2: wasn't like I just handed it to some guy and
• 1:40:25
  Speaker 2: I'm like, quickly. Yeah. He asked the guy, and he
• 1:40:28
  Speaker 2: probably knew, like, let me just get this fucking weird
• 1:40:31
  Speaker 2: egg-headed kid out of here and go about my day. Yeah,
• 1:40:34
  Speaker 2: this is a special needs adult. Yeah, it is. I
• 1:40:37
  Speaker 2: don't look particularly mentally healthy there or handsome. Did you
• 1:40:40
  Speaker 2: feel like you were handsome when you were a kid
• 1:40:42
  Speaker 2: or not? Never. Really? No, I look back now, I
• 1:40:44
  Speaker 2: was like, I was a cute little boy. I look back,
• 1:40:47
  Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, when I was, I get why
• 1:40:49
  Speaker 2: a lot of the older kids saw my face and deserved,
• 1:40:53
  Speaker 2: that we should hump that. I got it. I got it.
• 1:40:58
  Speaker 2: Were there a lot of predators in your neighborhood and shit? No,
• 1:41:00
  Speaker 2: we were all in the same age group. There was
• 1:41:02
  Speaker 2: maybe a couple, but no, my therapist tells me I
• 1:41:06
  Speaker 2: was molested, but I was like, I was kind of
• 1:41:09
  Speaker 2: volunteering for it. I was there for it. You know
• 1:41:12
  Speaker 2: what I mean? Like I was, yeah, I don't think so.
• 1:41:14
  Speaker 2: I was hanging out on the mistletoe type of, uh, yeah,
• 1:41:17
  Speaker 2: I was, I was, I was in on it, you know? Uh, Oh,
• 1:41:20
  Speaker 2: that's me at 17. That's you. That's me at 17.
• 1:41:23
  Speaker 2: Oh my God.
• 1:41:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:41:25
  Speaker 2: Young, young, young urban gym with a lot of attitude.
• 1:41:29
  Speaker 1: Wow, I did not see this. You look like somebody
• 1:41:31
  Speaker 1: that would work for Neil Brennan. You know what I'm saying?
• 1:41:36
  Speaker 1: You look like a black, definitely like a young wigger
• 1:41:38
  Speaker 1: type of child.
• 1:41:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that hat really should have been removed from my
• 1:41:42
  Speaker 2: head white with the clockwork orange shirt. I didn't know
• 1:41:44
  Speaker 2: what I wanted to be. Oh yeah, you're doing a
• 1:41:46
  Speaker 2: lot of things here. That's why when I see people
• 1:41:48
  Speaker 2: with these identity crises, especially when they're political about it
• 1:41:53
  Speaker 2: or whatever, I understand the identity crisis. We all have
• 1:41:55
  Speaker 2: them in time and eventually you grow into who you are. Oh, yeah, dude.
• 1:42:00
  Speaker 1: I was doing the black thing for a while for
• 1:42:02
  Speaker 1: a kid. I did, like, the Nirvana thing. Sure. Stone
• 1:42:06
  Speaker 1: Temple Pilots. You know, I did all the things. Marilyn Manson.
• 1:42:10
  Speaker 1: I went down a lot of different roads. The religious,
• 1:42:12
  Speaker 1: you know, like, different things. Just, like, you were like, yeah,
• 1:42:15
  Speaker 1: you're trying shit on.
• 1:42:16
  Speaker 2: You're trying stuff on. Like, and that was, I was into, like,
• 1:42:19
  Speaker 2: the little white kid who thinks he's black. I was
• 1:42:20
  Speaker 2: doing that long before it was fashionable.
• 1:42:22
  Speaker 5: Fuck, yeah.
• 1:42:23
  Speaker 2: Like, in the 80s. Like, you know, when Adidas still
• 1:42:25
  Speaker 2: had fat laces and that was considered.
• 1:42:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:42:27
  Speaker 2: But then you grow out of it and then you
• 1:42:29
  Speaker 2: just kind of, somebody said one time, like instead of
• 1:42:31
  Speaker 2: looking for who you are, just get rid of all
• 1:42:33
  Speaker 2: the shit that you're not and whoever you are just
• 1:42:35
  Speaker 2: shows up. And that kind of made sense. Like just
• 1:42:37
  Speaker 2: stop looking for it and just live and you'll find,
• 1:42:41
  Speaker 2: but I see so many people in life that are
• 1:42:42
  Speaker 2: looking for an identity. That's what so much of this
• 1:42:44
  Speaker 2: stuff is, public, you know what I mean? People that
• 1:42:47
  Speaker 2: are so adamant, always talk, always talking about the same thing,
• 1:42:50
  Speaker 2: always talking about the same thing. You're like, you want
• 1:42:51
  Speaker 2: an identity. You just, you're looking to, you want a
• 1:42:56
  Speaker 2: little prefab identity, like a little.
• 1:42:59
  Speaker 1: And do you think there's a way that we can
• 1:43:00
  Speaker 1: get to know, like, so one of the things you
• 1:43:03
  Speaker 1: just said is like, get rid of the things that
• 1:43:04
  Speaker 1: you're not, right?
• 1:43:05
  Speaker 3: Sure.
• 1:43:05
  Speaker 1: Like, yeah, how do we find our identity more? Because
• 1:43:07
  Speaker 1: I wonder if we used to be better at that.
• 1:43:09
  Speaker 1: I feel like if we used to have more of
• 1:43:12
  Speaker 1: communication with like our parents, you know, like back in
• 1:43:15
  Speaker 1: like almost like caveman time, was there something more that,
• 1:43:19
  Speaker 1: your identity was kind of shaped with just being able
• 1:43:21
  Speaker 1: to survive, right? And now we have this, all this other,
• 1:43:23
  Speaker 1: like this, all this other fucking ornamentation that helps us
• 1:43:28
  Speaker 1: get a reflection of ourselves. I just wonder if it
• 1:43:31
  Speaker 1: was different or if, how do, how do we find
• 1:43:33
  Speaker 1: our identity better?
• 1:43:34
  Speaker 2: I wonder. Well, there's also no, there was less pressure
• 1:43:37
  Speaker 2: then because now immediately everybody weighs in. So there's this
• 1:43:41
  Speaker 2: pressure to weigh in so we don't drown. Like we
• 1:43:43
  Speaker 2: wanna just be above sea level, we just wanna survive
• 1:43:47
  Speaker 2: and be noticed and be alive. So there's no time
• 1:43:49
  Speaker 2: for it. It's almost like that's why people have these, again,
• 1:43:51
  Speaker 2: these almost like big, like when you see a house
• 1:43:53
  Speaker 2: being driven down the street on the back of a flatbed,
• 1:43:55
  Speaker 2: like that prefab, pre-built house, that's how people are with
• 1:43:58
  Speaker 2: politics and with social issues. There's no time to go
• 1:44:02
  Speaker 2: looking for nuance. It's like, okay, that's who I am.
• 1:44:05
  Speaker 2: And that's who I'm associated with. Everybody's so afraid of
• 1:44:08
  Speaker 2: being run over by all of it. So I think
• 1:44:11
  Speaker 2: just don't listen to what everybody else is saying. I
• 1:44:14
  Speaker 2: don't give a shit what other people think about stuff.
• 1:44:16
  Speaker 2: I don't begrudge them, but I don't care. Like I
• 1:44:19
  Speaker 2: have plenty of friends whose politics I totally disagree with.
• 1:44:22
  Speaker 2: I don't give a fuck.
• 1:44:23
  Speaker 1: Did you have a tough time when you were young,
• 1:44:25
  Speaker 1: like deciding I'm going to make my own choice for myself?
• 1:44:28
  Speaker 2: Can you bring me one more water, Trevin? We'll finish
• 1:44:30
  Speaker 2: up in a couple minutes. That's fine. I have to piss.
• 1:44:33
  Speaker 2: I didn't believe we were going this long. How long
• 1:44:34
  Speaker 2: was the time? Probably two hours.
• 1:44:36
  Speaker 1: What?
• 1:44:37
  Speaker 2: You want to pee really fast? Can I? Yeah, because
• 1:44:39
  Speaker 2: I'm loving this chat. There's a bathroom right behind that curtain.
• 1:44:41
  Speaker 5: Oh, okay.
• 1:44:42
  Speaker 2: Awesome.
• 1:44:43
  Speaker 1: Dude, one thing I noticed about having to pee, dude, is...
• 1:44:47
  Speaker 1: As I get older, that kind of is not fun.
• 1:44:49
  Speaker 1: But here's what I notice is some of these underpants,
• 1:44:52
  Speaker 1: the stuff on them is too tight. So all night,
• 1:44:56
  Speaker 1: your bladder has to pee even with just a little
• 1:44:58
  Speaker 1: bit of liquid in it.
• 1:44:59
  Speaker 2: It's pressing all night. You're absolutely right. And also the
• 1:45:02
  Speaker 2: fact getting fatter doesn't help. Like when I fly, I
• 1:45:06
  Speaker 2: hate that feeling pressing on my bladder. I always wear
• 1:45:09
  Speaker 2: sweatpants and no underwear when I fly. And it's not
• 1:45:11
  Speaker 2: to be creepy. It's because this way I feel like,
• 1:45:14
  Speaker 2: I'm not as confined as I was. I piss constantly.
• 1:45:18
  Speaker 2: So the fact that I can go for however long
• 1:45:20
  Speaker 2: we've been talking without peeing. Every time I do Rogan,
• 1:45:22
  Speaker 2: I got to pee at least twice. Oh yeah. It's
• 1:45:24
  Speaker 2: so hard in there. Yeah. But I'll always just go,
• 1:45:26
  Speaker 2: I got to piss. And usually he does too. So
• 1:45:28
  Speaker 2: it's not a big deal, but like sometimes you just
• 1:45:30
  Speaker 2: talk right through it and you're like, I have to
• 1:45:31
  Speaker 2: go to the bathroom. What am I doing?
• 1:45:33
  Speaker 1: Oh, and like when you're riding the bag, when you're
• 1:45:34
  Speaker 1: sleeping at night and you have to pee and you
• 1:45:35
  Speaker 1: don't get up. Yep. That mesmerizing dark thing you do.
• 1:45:40
  Speaker 1: You're like, I'm just going to lay here.
• 1:45:42
  Speaker 2: Have you ever wet the bed as an adult? No,
• 1:45:44
  Speaker 2: as a kid, I wet the bed. Oh, I wet
• 1:45:45
  Speaker 2: the bed. I was probably 27. I wet once. Last
• 1:45:46
  Speaker 2: time I did. No, I've done it more recently than that.
• 1:45:51
  Speaker 2: I've done it since my wife has been there, too.
• 1:45:53
  Speaker 2: A few times I've wet the bed. But I don't care.
• 1:45:56
  Speaker 2: I don't feel bad. Sam used to think I was crazy.
• 1:45:58
  Speaker 2: But I'm like, it happens once in a while.
• 1:46:00
  Speaker 1: You sleep every night and you pee every day. You
• 1:46:03
  Speaker 1: don't think they're going to cross paths once in a while?
• 1:46:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like two ships passing in the once in a while.
• 1:46:08
  Speaker 5: They meet.
• 1:46:09
  Speaker 2: You think it's crazy? Yeah. Once in a while you're
• 1:46:12
  Speaker 2: asleep and you have to piss and you're like, no.
• 1:46:14
  Speaker 2: You dream about being in a pool. You dream about
• 1:46:16
  Speaker 2: being in the ocean. And you wake up and there's
• 1:46:18
  Speaker 2: urine on you. And I go right back to sleep.
• 1:46:20
  Speaker 2: I'll throw a towel on it, of course. I'm not
• 1:46:22
  Speaker 2: an animal. I'll put a little sawdust on it. A
• 1:46:26
  Speaker 2: little something and I'll lay into it. Oh, yeah.
• 1:46:30
  Speaker 1: But I remember as a kid, I was so scared
• 1:46:32
  Speaker 1: going to bed that I had to do all these
• 1:46:35
  Speaker 1: checks and balances in my room because I didn't realize
• 1:46:37
  Speaker 1: why I wet the bed for so long. And it
• 1:46:39
  Speaker 1: wasn't like about six months ago. I was remembering, oh, dude, well,
• 1:46:41
  Speaker 1: when you went to bed every night. you would have
• 1:46:44
  Speaker 1: to open a door, look in a closet, look at
• 1:46:46
  Speaker 1: a certain way, lean something against the door on the inside,
• 1:46:49
  Speaker 1: then on the outside, you'd have to look at certain.
• 1:46:53
  Speaker 1: No joke, it was probably a 13-minute process every night.
• 1:46:57
  Speaker 2: What were you afraid of?
• 1:46:58
  Speaker 1: I was just afraid of people getting in from outdoors.
• 1:47:01
  Speaker 1: I was afraid of killers, murderers, these hypothetical kind of boogeymen.
• 1:47:05
  Speaker 1: And we lived in a kind of scary neighborhood, so
• 1:47:08
  Speaker 1: I was just scared of all that. But I remember like, dude,
• 1:47:11
  Speaker 1: no wonder you slept in fucking... crazy fear. I'd fall
• 1:47:14
  Speaker 1: asleep like this or something. Couldn't cut my throat.
• 1:47:16
  Speaker 2: I remember. Really?
• 1:47:17
  Speaker 1: And it was so funny. I didn't for, I forgot
• 1:47:19
  Speaker 1: about this, but for years I did that. And I
• 1:47:21
  Speaker 1: was like, dude, no wonder you, your hands, you sleep
• 1:47:24
  Speaker 1: like that. I would sleep like that. Cause I didn't
• 1:47:25
  Speaker 1: want something to cut my throat. I wanted to cut
• 1:47:27
  Speaker 1: my hand first.
• 1:47:28
  Speaker 2: I would know. Right, right, yeah, of course.
• 1:47:30
  Speaker 1: I don't know what made me so scared.
• 1:47:32
  Speaker 2: Although if somebody had the wherewithal to get in with
• 1:47:34
  Speaker 2: a knife, they could have just taken a feather and
• 1:47:36
  Speaker 2: tickled your nose, and then you would have went like that,
• 1:47:38
  Speaker 2: and then they could have fucking just sliced the jugular.
• 1:47:41
  Speaker 2: There's ways around that. Yeah, I didn't think ahead. Do
• 1:47:44
  Speaker 2: you sleep on your back? I can't sleep on my back. No,
• 1:47:47
  Speaker 2: that's crazy. Oh, you lay on your side like that?
• 1:47:48
  Speaker 2: I'll lay on my side, yeah. Okay, that I can do.
• 1:47:51
  Speaker 1: That I feel like is okay. I wanted to talk
• 1:47:53
  Speaker 1: about Kill Tony. You've been labeled by some as one
• 1:47:55
  Speaker 1: of the best Kill Tony guests. Which is kind of
• 1:47:58
  Speaker 1: rare because they hate everybody kind of.
• 1:48:00
  Speaker 2: They do.
• 1:48:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:48:01
  Speaker 2: They're like old ONA fans too. They're just animals. Yeah.
• 1:48:03
  Speaker 2: They're animals. They hate everyone. But I think I love
• 1:48:06
  Speaker 2: doing that show. You did the garden, yeah? I did.
• 1:48:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:48:10
  Speaker 2: It was like a five or six minute standup set.
• 1:48:13
  Speaker 2: That's cool. It's tough to do there. It is a
• 1:48:15
  Speaker 2: different energy, man. And I did it last year, but
• 1:48:19
  Speaker 2: they didn't film it. for me. They just kind of
• 1:48:20
  Speaker 2: shot it for clips. But when you're doing the panel,
• 1:48:25
  Speaker 2: at the Mothership, I've done the panel a lot. And
• 1:48:28
  Speaker 2: I always like to give, if I can give the
• 1:48:30
  Speaker 2: comics a bit of advice, I try to. Because a
• 1:48:33
  Speaker 2: lot of those guys are really terrible and a lot
• 1:48:35
  Speaker 2: of them are really good, but they're just raw. Yeah.
• 1:48:38
  Speaker 2: And as a new comic man, I was so fucking
• 1:48:41
  Speaker 2: easily wounded that if someone like made it seem like
• 1:48:44
  Speaker 2: I really had nothing, I probably would have quit. So I,
• 1:48:47
  Speaker 2: I always try to like fuck around and if I
• 1:48:49
  Speaker 2: can say something that helps them, I try to. That's
• 1:48:52
  Speaker 2: a good point. Yeah.
• 1:48:53
  Speaker 1: I think I remember now that when you said that,
• 1:48:55
  Speaker 1: I remember like one of the first nights I ever
• 1:48:56
  Speaker 1: did comedy or maybe the third or fourth time. Like
• 1:48:59
  Speaker 1: I started like down in new Orleans and Mark Norman
• 1:49:01
  Speaker 1: was there. Um, Dane Foshea, a couple of some, some
• 1:49:04
  Speaker 1: local guys, Scotland green, some different comedians down there. And, um,
• 1:49:08
  Speaker 1: But I remember the bartender said, hey, man, you did
• 1:49:10
  Speaker 1: a good job. And just something like that little kept
• 1:49:13
  Speaker 1: me coming back for the next two months.
• 1:49:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because somebody who's in the know, somebody who's in
• 1:49:19
  Speaker 2: that scene recognized it. You're right. The bartender in a
• 1:49:22
  Speaker 2: comedy club or in a comedy scene, they see everybody.
• 1:49:25
  Speaker 2: So when they like you, you're like, all right, I
• 1:49:26
  Speaker 2: must be doing something right because they see everyone who comes.
• 1:49:29
  Speaker 2: There was a guy named Rob at Rascals who's a bartender.
• 1:49:33
  Speaker 2: And he always liked me. And he was always like, yeah,
• 1:49:34
  Speaker 2: you're really funny, man. And that gave me confidence back
• 1:49:37
  Speaker 2: then because every comic came through there. And the fact
• 1:49:39
  Speaker 2: that Rob thought I was funny meant something. You know
• 1:49:42
  Speaker 2: what I mean? That's like when other comics respect you. Oh, yeah.
• 1:49:45
  Speaker 2: You feel like, fuck, I'm doing something right. Because the
• 1:49:48
  Speaker 2: guys that are the hardest to make laugh or the
• 1:49:51
  Speaker 2: most critical about it like what I'm doing.
• 1:49:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, one night I was coming off stage and Bill
• 1:49:56
  Speaker 1: Burr said something. I had to go on before him
• 1:49:57
  Speaker 1: at the Dolby Theater. And I was so nervous. I'd
• 1:49:59
  Speaker 1: never even been on a theater stage before. And I
• 1:50:01
  Speaker 1: did pretty good. It just went good. And I was
• 1:50:04
  Speaker 1: coming off and he's like, pretty good, man. You know,
• 1:50:07
  Speaker 1: some little, even just getting him to even fucking, even
• 1:50:10
  Speaker 1: if he just spit on my back, you know?
• 1:50:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:50:12
  Speaker 1: If he'd have come on one of my legs, I'd
• 1:50:14
  Speaker 1: have been like, that's, thank you. Be just multiple migs
• 1:50:17
  Speaker 1: to that.
• 1:50:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah.
• 1:50:21
  Speaker 1: Has the audience stopped cheering, Clarice? But yeah, it would
• 1:50:24
  Speaker 1: have been perfect, dude. But yeah, it's so funny, the
• 1:50:27
  Speaker 1: little things like that. What do you think about Kill
• 1:50:29
  Speaker 1: Tony and that whole, like, when you see that, what
• 1:50:32
  Speaker 1: do you think about? Do you see it as a phenomenon? Like,
• 1:50:34
  Speaker 1: do you see it as like a change? Like, what
• 1:50:36
  Speaker 1: do you think about it?
• 1:50:37
  Speaker 2: I think it's great because it gives a lot, the
• 1:50:40
  Speaker 2: people who badmouth it, It's like, it's really, it's honest.
• 1:50:44
  Speaker 2: It's like these young guys are getting up on stage.
• 1:50:47
  Speaker 2: Some are brand new and you're watching this minute process.
• 1:50:51
  Speaker 2: It's very hard to be funny in a minute. So hard.
• 1:50:54
  Speaker 2: And I love the fact that, cause Tony is so fast.
• 1:50:57
  Speaker 2: Like he really is quick, like lightning fucking fast. And
• 1:51:01
  Speaker 2: when he plays with people, sometimes they'll be terrible on stage,
• 1:51:05
  Speaker 2: but they'll win them over in the interview. So he
• 1:51:08
  Speaker 2: gives you a shot. You have a fair shot at
• 1:51:10
  Speaker 2: kill Tony. No one can interrupt your minute. And during
• 1:51:14
  Speaker 2: the interview, if you have a comic's brain and you're funny,
• 1:51:18
  Speaker 2: you'll be acknowledged as being funny even if your set
• 1:51:20
  Speaker 2: wasn't good. I don't feel like there's any bias like, hey,
• 1:51:23
  Speaker 2: we're going to get this guy because he thinks this
• 1:51:25
  Speaker 2: or we're going to choose that guy because he thinks that.
• 1:51:28
  Speaker 2: I agree. I think there's a very– it's a very
• 1:51:30
  Speaker 2: honest– uh formula i love doing it um and i
• 1:51:35
  Speaker 2: just have a fun time when i do it it's
• 1:51:36
  Speaker 2: so pressure free and it's just fun to fuck around
• 1:51:39
  Speaker 2: and riff it's like radio like i i love doing
• 1:51:42
  Speaker 2: that show yeah.
• 1:51:42
  Speaker 1: And you get to be around other guys like you're
• 1:51:44
  Speaker 1: saying you know you just get to be around another
• 1:51:46
  Speaker 1: group of like comics you're all together there's the blind
• 1:51:49
  Speaker 1: guy there's the chris rogers is doing art you know
• 1:51:52
  Speaker 1: it's like or the black guy they took his eyes
• 1:51:54
  Speaker 1: out for being black or whatever which is crazy It's like,
• 1:51:57
  Speaker 1: come on, dude, those times have changed, but okay. And
• 1:52:01
  Speaker 1: then Tony is in a weird way. It's so perfect
• 1:52:04
  Speaker 1: because Tony's almost always, he's kind of the bad guy, right?
• 1:52:08
  Speaker 1: He's the wizard, but he's also the bad guy, right? Like, so,
• 1:52:12
  Speaker 1: you know, he's like, cause he's so like, he can
• 1:52:16
  Speaker 1: be so, uh, just cutting. Yes. That in the end,
• 1:52:20
  Speaker 1: he's almost always the bad guy. And yeah, some of
• 1:52:23
  Speaker 1: those people are setting themselves up for complete failure. Some
• 1:52:25
  Speaker 1: of them just want a moment of that pain of
• 1:52:27
  Speaker 1: being up there. And some of them, they're getting up
• 1:52:29
  Speaker 1: there to try it. And it probably gets a lot
• 1:52:31
  Speaker 1: of those bugs out of their, just the nerves out
• 1:52:32
  Speaker 1: of their system.
• 1:52:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, if you can survive in that, it's a huge stage.
• 1:52:36
  Speaker 2: Even if you're just doing the mothership, you still know
• 1:52:38
  Speaker 2: how many people are going to see it. And he's
• 1:52:40
  Speaker 2: a sniper. Like, you know what I mean? He picks
• 1:52:42
  Speaker 2: up on everything. But if you're good, if he thinks
• 1:52:45
  Speaker 2: you're funny, he won't like, oh, let me go trash
• 1:52:48
  Speaker 2: this guy because I have to. He'll acknowledge you as
• 1:52:50
  Speaker 2: being funny and have a good time talking to you
• 1:52:52
  Speaker 2: so i think if you go into it with that
• 1:52:54
  Speaker 2: and you know like hey it can go either way
• 1:52:56
  Speaker 2: um i think you're gonna have a good time but
• 1:53:00
  Speaker 2: i couldn't have done it six months in i would
• 1:53:01
  Speaker 2: have been fucking terrified to do that show six months in.
• 1:53:04
  Speaker 1: Oh it would have been so crazy and that just
• 1:53:06
  Speaker 1: shows you that times are different somehow i think with
• 1:53:08
  Speaker 1: people seeing clips of things the the the psychology of
• 1:53:13
  Speaker 1: society changes and how people are able to be something
• 1:53:16
  Speaker 1: and not Like, when I was coming up, I couldn't
• 1:53:19
  Speaker 1: have just, I don't think, gone and done that and
• 1:53:20
  Speaker 1: known that that many people.
• 1:53:21
  Speaker 2: Could see it. It would have been way too scary. Yeah,
• 1:53:23
  Speaker 2: it would have been terrifying. But the balls on, like,
• 1:53:25
  Speaker 2: because they see guys, like, all these guys that are
• 1:53:27
  Speaker 2: coming through, they're all doing well. The ones that have
• 1:53:29
  Speaker 2: kind of come through, you know, Cam Patterson is doing great.
• 1:53:31
  Speaker 2: He just made SNL. He did. Okay, I had heard that,
• 1:53:34
  Speaker 2: but I didn't want to say it. I didn't know
• 1:53:35
  Speaker 2: if they announced it yet. He just took it.
• 1:53:37
  Speaker 3: Please don't.
• 1:53:37
  Speaker 2: Good for Cam. Good, yeah, I heard that last week.
• 1:53:40
  Speaker 2: Good for him. Tommy Brennan.
• 1:53:43
  Speaker 1: Jeremy Culhane, Cam Patterson, and Veronica Slowikowska.
• 1:53:48
  Speaker 2: That's great. Yeah, I'm happy that that was official. I
• 1:53:51
  Speaker 2: congratulate them. I'm like, I won't say. Ari Maddy is
• 1:53:55
  Speaker 2: very funny. Christina Mariani. Christina Mariani is very funny, too.
• 1:54:00
  Speaker 2: There's a good group of people there. I know Fiona Cawley.
• 1:54:04
  Speaker 2: I'm forgetting some people, so I apologize. Fiona's from here,
• 1:54:07
  Speaker 2: I think, isn't she? Is she redheaded? Yes. I don't
• 1:54:10
  Speaker 2: know where she's from. Is she.
• 1:54:13
  Speaker 1: does she seem like she's like in a wheelchair or whatever?
• 1:54:16
  Speaker 1: I did get that impression.
• 1:54:17
  Speaker 2: Okay. Yeah.
• 1:54:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:54:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Very, very definitively got that impression when she wheeled in.
• 1:54:23
  Speaker 2: I wasn't, I was like, she didn't seem like it that,
• 1:54:25
  Speaker 2: that like right now I seem like I'm in a
• 1:54:27
  Speaker 2: wheelchair cause I'm sitting here. But when somebody wheels in,
• 1:54:29
  Speaker 2: you can say without reservation, that person's in a wheelchair.
• 1:54:35
  Speaker 2: And blessings Fiona. She should be on SNL. She's great.
• 1:54:39
  Speaker 1: She and I have actually worked together on the same
• 1:54:41
  Speaker 1: show a few times. So, I just, yeah, same, yeah, definitely.
• 1:54:44
  Speaker 1: I like that whole crew, and they're all nice.
• 1:54:47
  Speaker 2: You see them on the events now, and they're getting
• 1:54:49
  Speaker 2: real followings, so many of them. So it's nice to
• 1:54:53
  Speaker 2: see these young comics doing really well. And some people,
• 1:54:57
  Speaker 2: I don't know why anybody would begrudge those guys. It's
• 1:55:00
  Speaker 2: like there's room for everybody.
• 1:55:01
  Speaker 1: That's what Rogan always says, and that's one thing that
• 1:55:03
  Speaker 1: I admire about him the most. He always says that
• 1:55:05
  Speaker 1: there's room for everybody. There's room for all of us
• 1:55:07
  Speaker 1: to lift each other up.
• 1:55:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm not afraid of my spot. We all, as
• 1:55:11
  Speaker 2: we get older, you feel like, oh, I suck, I'm worthless.
• 1:55:14
  Speaker 2: It's just a part of what made me a comic
• 1:55:16
  Speaker 2: to begin with. I mean, if I had great self-esteem,
• 1:55:18
  Speaker 2: I would not have gotten into this line of work.
• 1:55:21
  Speaker 2: That part of me has remained the same. But as
• 1:55:23
  Speaker 2: far as shitting on other people, we're trying to keep
• 1:55:26
  Speaker 2: other people down because of what they say or their beliefs.
• 1:55:29
  Speaker 2: It's just such a weak pussy thing to do. It's like,
• 1:55:32
  Speaker 2: who the fuck cares? I don't care what other guys
• 1:55:35
  Speaker 2: are talking about on stage, as long as you're not
• 1:55:36
  Speaker 2: stealing material. Whatever point of view you're talking about, good,
• 1:55:40
  Speaker 2: make it funny. Yeah, I don't even have time to
• 1:55:42
  Speaker 2: think about that. No, but guys do. You do the
• 1:55:46
  Speaker 2: joke from the wrong angle and people are like, whoa.
• 1:55:49
  Speaker 2: And it's dishonest. When people criticize that, it's not like, hey,
• 1:55:53
  Speaker 2: I'm old and I can't handle young people being involved.
• 1:55:55
  Speaker 2: It's that I think it's dishonest and attacking other comics
• 1:55:59
  Speaker 2: for material points of view is a way for you
• 1:56:02
  Speaker 2: to climb socially. it's become one more way to climb
• 1:56:05
  Speaker 2: the ladder. It's not based, these purity tests are just
• 1:56:08
  Speaker 2: one more way for people to climb the ladder. They
• 1:56:11
  Speaker 2: give you a purity test, you fail, they climb a
• 1:56:13
  Speaker 2: little higher because they gave the test. It's nonsense.
• 1:56:16
  Speaker 1: But that ladder has fallen so far down in society.
• 1:56:18
  Speaker 1: I think people are just like, whatever that whole system
• 1:56:22
  Speaker 1: was for so long is disappearing so much. You know,
• 1:56:25
  Speaker 1: I think that's why it's like, yeah, I don't know.
• 1:56:28
  Speaker 1: People just make their own choices now. Like, who's going
• 1:56:31
  Speaker 1: to listen to some article or some fuck, you know,
• 1:56:33
  Speaker 1: it's like, I believe we're in a space where more
• 1:56:35
  Speaker 1: and more it feels like people would make their own choices,
• 1:56:38
  Speaker 1: but maybe not.
• 1:56:38
  Speaker 2: You hope so. I mean, and I've never like, I never,
• 1:56:41
  Speaker 2: no one changes my mind. Like I think for myself, like,
• 1:56:45
  Speaker 2: everyone can say what they want. Cause I, I think
• 1:56:47
  Speaker 2: for myself, like people will say things about like, well,
• 1:56:49
  Speaker 2: when he says that they'll come after Rogan, what he
• 1:56:52
  Speaker 2: says is dangerous. And I'm like, well, have you listened
• 1:56:55
  Speaker 2: to him? And they're like, yeah. Did he change your mind?
• 1:56:57
  Speaker 1: No.
• 1:56:57
  Speaker 2: Well then why don't you give everybody that credit? Like
• 1:57:00
  Speaker 2: people give themselves the ability to, to, to go through
• 1:57:03
  Speaker 2: information intelligently, but they think the rest of the public
• 1:57:06
  Speaker 2: are a bunch of blithering tards who can't do it.
• 1:57:09
  Speaker 2: And it's like, no, you're not the only one. who
• 1:57:11
  Speaker 2: can sift through information.
• 1:57:12
  Speaker 1: And some people don't operate, do not make their decisions
• 1:57:16
  Speaker 1: from information based on the analysis of the information. They
• 1:57:19
  Speaker 1: base it on how the information makes them feel. And
• 1:57:22
  Speaker 1: I don't think that those people are necessarily, one is
• 1:57:25
  Speaker 1: necessarily more right than the other sometimes.
• 1:57:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And it's hard to kind of like just tune
• 1:57:29
  Speaker 2: it all out. I tried to, I like, there was
• 1:57:32
  Speaker 2: years I didn't check at mentions on Twitter. Like I
• 1:57:35
  Speaker 2: just don't, I don't give a fuck what everybody's talking about. Oh, yes.
• 1:57:39
  Speaker 2: What does he say about that? Give us a shit.
• 1:57:42
  Speaker 2: I don't have time to. Yeah, I don't. I really don't.
• 1:57:45
  Speaker 2: I don't care. Yeah. It's not interesting to me. Yeah. Like,
• 1:57:48
  Speaker 2: you know, if it's a friend and I'm talking to him, sure.
• 1:57:50
  Speaker 2: But do I care who other people vote for? Like,
• 1:57:53
  Speaker 2: it is of no relevance to me whatsoever.
• 1:57:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 1:57:56
  Speaker 2: I don't know how people. And like, if you say
• 1:57:58
  Speaker 2: something good about Trump, but there's policies he has that
• 1:58:01
  Speaker 2: I very much disagree with. But like you say anything
• 1:58:04
  Speaker 2: good about him, like he's a, how could you? It's like,
• 1:58:06
  Speaker 2: shut up. Take your little identity hat off. Just be
• 1:58:09
  Speaker 2: a person. Have a conversation.
• 1:58:11
  Speaker 1: When you think about this stuff, like in DC, they
• 1:58:13
  Speaker 1: just had where they, they want to clean up some
• 1:58:15
  Speaker 1: of these cities and they're using the National Guard, which
• 1:58:17
  Speaker 1: I've always thought is like, you know, police are in
• 1:58:19
  Speaker 1: this tough space where everybody's filming them. And it's like,
• 1:58:23
  Speaker 1: it feels like they need more support somehow. A lot
• 1:58:25
  Speaker 1: of cities have become overrun with crime. Trump's use of
• 1:58:29
  Speaker 1: National Guard in Los Angeles was illegal.
• 1:58:31
  Speaker 2: Judge rules. Yeah, I know Brandon Johnson in Chicago is
• 1:58:35
  Speaker 2: not for it. He's the worst mayor in the country.
• 1:58:37
  Speaker 3: Is he?
• 1:58:38
  Speaker 2: Awful.
• 1:58:38
  Speaker 1: Chicago's mayor pushes back as Trump administration readies immigration crackdown.
• 1:58:42
  Speaker 2: Let's see what they say.
• 1:58:43
  Speaker 1: Chicago's mayor is limited how much his city's police department
• 1:58:45
  Speaker 1: can cooperate with federal immigration agents in response to threats
• 1:58:49
  Speaker 1: from the Trump administration to ramp up immigration issues. enforcement
• 1:58:52
  Speaker 1: operations in the city. So it's just about immigration.
• 1:58:55
  Speaker 2: And like they did, I don't know. They, they didn't
• 1:58:58
  Speaker 2: want national guard helping with immigration. They didn't want to
• 1:59:02
  Speaker 2: help national guard immigration or troops, but if they're just
• 1:59:05
  Speaker 2: doing it to control crime, it's like crime is it's
• 1:59:08
  Speaker 2: a mess. I agree. As long as they're not interfering
• 1:59:10
  Speaker 2: with people's comings and goings, if they're just patrolling the
• 1:59:13
  Speaker 2: streets and giving the police some assistance, You know, most
• 1:59:17
  Speaker 2: of the people who are against these policies, a lot
• 1:59:19
  Speaker 2: of them don't live in those neighborhoods. A lot of
• 1:59:20
  Speaker 2: them can leave their house without being fucking worried about
• 1:59:22
  Speaker 2: being robbed by somebody selling drugs. So I think if
• 1:59:25
  Speaker 2: it keeps people safer, as long as you're not infringing
• 1:59:28
  Speaker 2: on their right to do anything.
• 1:59:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:59:30
  Speaker 2: Um, I, you know, I have a real salt. Look,
• 1:59:33
  Speaker 2: here's the reality. The most important thing Trump has done is, uh,
• 1:59:37
  Speaker 2: he is, he is honoring kiss at the Kennedy center.
• 1:59:40
  Speaker 2: And I'm going to tell you, there's nothing that has
• 1:59:41
  Speaker 2: made me happier than any politician has ever done. Is
• 1:59:44
  Speaker 2: he really doing that? Gene, Peter, Ace, and Paul, the
• 1:59:46
  Speaker 2: original four members are being honored at the Kennedy center.
• 1:59:49
  Speaker 2: Nothing has made me happier than that. I love him.
• 1:59:52
  Speaker 2: I love that he did that. I would hug him.
• 1:59:55
  Speaker 1: I mean, he does a lot of interesting stuff, man.
• 1:59:57
  Speaker 1: And I hope that some of the, his plans for
• 1:59:59
  Speaker 1: the country and stuff are good. You know, like I
• 2:00:02
  Speaker 1: hope we see a lot of the things that he,
• 2:00:04
  Speaker 1: you know, kind of tried to campaign on. And I
• 2:00:06
  Speaker 1: think it's just really interesting when guys campaign. And then
• 2:00:09
  Speaker 1: when they get in office, I bet things are way
• 2:00:11
  Speaker 1: different and we don't know what those things are like,
• 2:00:13
  Speaker 1: you know, but I hope that he has a lot
• 2:00:15
  Speaker 1: of long-term like beneficial things for the everyday American, you know?
• 2:00:20
  Speaker 2: I bet you Obama was very disappointed because he was
• 2:00:24
  Speaker 2: like a young, not too tainted by politics guy, but
• 2:00:28
  Speaker 2: he was still a relatively young guy. Oh, yeah, I
• 2:00:29
  Speaker 2: voted for him. And he had all these hopes and dreams.
• 2:00:33
  Speaker 2: And then you get into it and you're like, oh,
• 2:00:35
  Speaker 2: there's a lot of muck and glue and things. I
• 2:00:39
  Speaker 2: bet you that his idealism somehow got squashed a little
• 2:00:44
  Speaker 2: bit when he saw how it really worked from being
• 2:00:46
  Speaker 2: deep in it. And these things that you think you're
• 2:00:48
  Speaker 2: going to fix, you can't.
• 2:00:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what does it say here? What effect did Trump's
• 2:00:55
  Speaker 1: crackdown on crime in Washington, D.C. led to a significant
• 2:00:57
  Speaker 1: drop in reported violent crime and property crime? It also
• 2:01:00
  Speaker 1: generated controversy, strains on the legal system, and a dramatic
• 2:01:03
  Speaker 1: increase in immigration-related arrests. Violent crime fell by about 49
• 2:01:06
  Speaker 1: percent compared to the same period the previous year, with
• 2:01:09
  Speaker 1: overall property crimes and car theft also down by 30
• 2:01:11
  Speaker 1: to 40 percent. I wonder if they're just using this
• 2:01:14
  Speaker 1: as a ruse, though, for ICE and immigration.
• 2:01:18
  Speaker 2: But Yeah. I don't know. I think that there's a
• 2:01:21
  Speaker 2: genuine desire in cities that have really high crime rates
• 2:01:25
  Speaker 2: to bring it down. Please. I think people's biggest concern
• 2:01:28
  Speaker 2: is they want to be able to leave the house.
• 2:01:30
  Speaker 2: People care about abortion. They care about all this. But
• 2:01:32
  Speaker 2: people want to be able to leave the house and
• 2:01:33
  Speaker 2: go to work without being fucking hit over the head
• 2:01:35
  Speaker 2: with a pipe. Like, you know what I mean? There
• 2:01:39
  Speaker 2: is a really basic desire to want to get in
• 2:01:43
  Speaker 2: your car without it being stolen at gunpoint. Like, These
• 2:01:47
  Speaker 2: things that we take for granted so many times, violent
• 2:01:50
  Speaker 2: crime to me, because it's such an avoidable thing. So avoidable.
• 2:01:54
  Speaker 2: It's so avoidable. So if he's using these forces the
• 2:01:58
  Speaker 2: way he says he's using them, I have no problem
• 2:02:00
  Speaker 2: with it. And I don't want to see, look, illegal
• 2:02:03
  Speaker 2: immigrants who are housekeepers, who are just out working, who
• 2:02:06
  Speaker 2: are whatever they're doing. Like they're out building houses. They're out.
• 2:02:09
  Speaker 2: I have no problem. Contributing, being good. Some great members
• 2:02:13
  Speaker 2: of America. There are people who just want a better life.
• 2:02:15
  Speaker 2: Like those people I don't want to see kicked out.
• 2:02:17
  Speaker 2: I know they're here illegally, but I still have empathy
• 2:02:20
  Speaker 2: for someone doing that. But as soon as you commit
• 2:02:22
  Speaker 2: crimes and like you commit a violent felony or even
• 2:02:25
  Speaker 2: an assault out.
• 2:02:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:02:27
  Speaker 2: I mean, that's it. There should be no second chance.
• 2:02:29
  Speaker 2: I mean, if you're lucky enough to be here, don't
• 2:02:32
  Speaker 2: commit violent crimes. I mean, I don't think that's crazy. Yeah.
• 2:02:35
  Speaker 1: And especially if as a regular citizen here, if you
• 2:02:37
  Speaker 1: commit a violent crime that you're held to a certain standard,
• 2:02:39
  Speaker 1: you know.
• 2:02:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah. You're going to jail.
• 2:02:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:02:41
  Speaker 2: You're not being released immediately.
• 2:02:43
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:02:43
  Speaker 2: I think there's a lot of holes. It's, it's tough.
• 2:02:45
  Speaker 2: I don't know, man.
• 2:02:46
  Speaker 1: You know, when we just try our best and you
• 2:02:47
  Speaker 1: try your best just to show up for yourself every
• 2:02:49
  Speaker 1: day and your new wife and. Yeah.
• 2:02:53
  Speaker 2: And to not be a bad boy on the road.
• 2:02:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:02:55
  Speaker 2: Talking to her in the dog. Is that tough? It
• 2:02:58
  Speaker 2: is because again, but it's not like there's one specific thing.
• 2:03:01
  Speaker 2: It's tough because it's, addiction is selfish and like it's,
• 2:03:06
  Speaker 2: it's about, it's about getting high and it's about, feeling
• 2:03:09
  Speaker 2: that rush. So, so many times you want to do
• 2:03:11
  Speaker 2: things just to get away from yourself. Oh yeah. Like I, I,
• 2:03:14
  Speaker 2: I'm not happy with how I look. I'm going to
• 2:03:17
  Speaker 2: jerk off or I'm going to fucking, yeah.
• 2:03:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:03:19
  Speaker 2: And I do that too much. I mean, I really do.
• 2:03:21
  Speaker 2: I mean, up and down the, fucking East coast. There
• 2:03:23
  Speaker 2: are towels that probably should not be used by another person.
• 2:03:27
  Speaker 2: My apologies to any guests who's drying off and your
• 2:03:29
  Speaker 2: back gets scraped up because the towel is too rough.
• 2:03:32
  Speaker 2: That's my bed. Yeah, it really is tough times, but, uh, it's,
• 2:03:40
  Speaker 2: it's not, uh, you know, what do they say? I'm
• 2:03:42
  Speaker 2: not the man I could be or should be, but
• 2:03:44
  Speaker 2: I'm not the man I was like, you know, my
• 2:03:46
  Speaker 2: life is better now. I'm happily married. I mean, despite
• 2:03:49
  Speaker 2: being annoyed at times of being married, um, I love
• 2:03:53
  Speaker 2: the fact that my wife enjoys when I joke about
• 2:03:56
  Speaker 2: us on stage. She's not sensitive about like, you know
• 2:03:59
  Speaker 2: what I mean? I just, right. You can be free
• 2:04:00
  Speaker 2: in your relationship.
• 2:04:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:04:02
  Speaker 2: She loves it.
• 2:04:02
  Speaker 1: And we all send videos of like jerking off and
• 2:04:04
  Speaker 1: stuff like that or no, do people do that?
• 2:04:06
  Speaker 4: No.
• 2:04:07
  Speaker 2: I mean, I, she sent me some nude photos and videos,
• 2:04:10
  Speaker 2: but that's cool. We live together. And like, that's the
• 2:04:13
  Speaker 2: one thing when you're married, that perverted stuff, right? Sometimes.
• 2:04:17
  Speaker 2: Cause you can hook up whenever you want.
• 2:04:19
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 2:04:19
  Speaker 2: But if I asked her for a video jerking off,
• 2:04:20
  Speaker 2: she'd probably send it to me. She has in the past.
• 2:04:22
  Speaker 2: That's nice. Yeah, I'll ask her.
• 2:04:25
  Speaker 1: Eddie Money showed me some pictures of his new wife
• 2:04:28
  Speaker 1: one time on a plane.
• 2:04:30
  Speaker 2: Nude? Pretty nude. Whoa. I like Eddie Money. He's dead now, unfortunately.
• 2:04:36
  Speaker 1: Dude, he said he hit a can of Huff one
• 2:04:38
  Speaker 1: time so hard that one of his legs quit working.
• 2:04:41
  Speaker 2: Really? Fuck yeah. He was a fascinating guy. He overdosed,
• 2:04:45
  Speaker 2: survived a lot of stuff. Was his wife look good naked?
• 2:04:49
  Speaker 2: Are you good? I'll show you my wife's penis if
• 2:04:50
  Speaker 2: you want, but she wouldn't care. You're crazy. Yeah, she
• 2:04:53
  Speaker 2: wouldn't care. Oh, dude, maybe just do a drawing of
• 2:04:56
  Speaker 2: it for me. Okay, all right. You think? Just show it,
• 2:04:58
  Speaker 2: and I'll kind of go like this a little. All right.
• 2:05:01
  Speaker 2: I won't show it on camera just because— No, no, no,
• 2:05:02
  Speaker 2: just show it to me. I don't want to see
• 2:05:03
  Speaker 2: all of it at once. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I
• 2:05:06
  Speaker 2: can't show it all on camera because she's a lady.
• 2:05:07
  Speaker 2: She wouldn't care for that. No lady wants their penis
• 2:05:09
  Speaker 2: shown completely on camera. Oh, for sure. Dude, I don't
• 2:05:11
  Speaker 2: even want to fucking look at it. Oh, I won't
• 2:05:13
  Speaker 2: show it to you if you don't want to look
• 2:05:15
  Speaker 2: at it. No, I'm okay. Let me see here. Hold on.
• 2:05:20
  Speaker 2: I won't just hit you with it. Yeah, it's no surprise.
• 2:05:22
  Speaker 2: You don't be like. Let me find an acceptable photo
• 2:05:26
  Speaker 2: that she would be proud of. Okay. No, she wouldn't
• 2:05:31
  Speaker 2: like that. That's a video. I'll find one for you. Yeah,
• 2:05:34
  Speaker 2: take your time. I'm going to think about something else
• 2:05:37
  Speaker 2: for just a minute. All right. You want to see? Yeah,
• 2:05:39
  Speaker 2: hold on. Okay.
• 2:05:40
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:05:41
  Speaker 2: Whoa, brother. What the heck? Oh, my God, Jim. Your
• 2:05:48
  Speaker 2: wife has that? That's my lady. That's my best gal. Wow.
• 2:05:57
  Speaker 2: That is a tall pussy. She's a tall lady. She's
• 2:06:03
  Speaker 2: a tall lady. Oh, that thing's in 4-H, huh? Yeah. Oh,
• 2:06:06
  Speaker 2: you got to spray some Roundup on that. Yeah. God, yeah,
• 2:06:10
  Speaker 2: you got to get back home. Yeah, I mean, sometimes
• 2:06:12
  Speaker 2: I need a break. You know what I mean? Your
• 2:06:14
  Speaker 2: body collects and You're like, I'll take a little break. Oh, yeah. Bro,
• 2:06:19
  Speaker 2: you could file your nails down on that thing.
• 2:06:25
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:06:25
  Speaker 2: But it's funny. It's like it really is. That's the
• 2:06:27
  Speaker 2: main difference in the relationship. It's like compared to other
• 2:06:30
  Speaker 2: women I've dated. Mm-hmm. as a person, there's no difference.
• 2:06:33
  Speaker 2: Like our life is the same as anybody's life. Thank God.
• 2:06:37
  Speaker 2: She has a sense of humor. I love that. She
• 2:06:39
  Speaker 2: has a sense of humor. I love that. You'd have
• 2:06:40
  Speaker 2: to have that. Yeah. Um, but some don't, I've dated
• 2:06:44
  Speaker 2: people who would get mad if I talked about certain
• 2:06:46
  Speaker 2: things and I've even gone out with trans girls. It
• 2:06:48
  Speaker 2: would be very mad at me just doing that. So
• 2:06:51
  Speaker 2: the fact that she has a good sense of humor, man,
• 2:06:53
  Speaker 2: if she didn't, I wouldn't have done that. Like I'm
• 2:06:55
  Speaker 2: fucking around, but yeah, that's correct.
• 2:06:56
  Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, I wouldn't, I mean, I would never
• 2:06:58
  Speaker 1: even look at some, guy's wiener but it's a woman's
• 2:07:02
  Speaker 1: wiener yeah.
• 2:07:03
  Speaker 2: I mean i guess it depends on people look at
• 2:07:05
  Speaker 2: that differently too like there's a lot of people that
• 2:07:07
  Speaker 2: are uh very anti uh that label being put on
• 2:07:12
  Speaker 2: on trans women but i i think that uh you
• 2:07:14
  Speaker 2: know but if you if you spend any time with
• 2:07:16
  Speaker 2: my wife it's just it's not a man's brain and
• 2:07:18
  Speaker 2: people are like dude just admit it you're gay we
• 2:07:20
  Speaker 2: don't care I understand why people say that.
• 2:07:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:07:23
  Speaker 2: And I really do. Like, I get it. And, again,
• 2:07:26
  Speaker 2: I couldn't prove the point in court because my partner
• 2:07:30
  Speaker 2: has a penis. Like, there's no way around that. Yeah. But,
• 2:07:33
  Speaker 2: you know, unless you have a long way of time
• 2:07:34
  Speaker 2: to walk or a small ladder. Yeah. That seemed like
• 2:07:40
  Speaker 2: a woman's wiener to me. Well, yes, that's how I
• 2:07:43
  Speaker 2: look at it. But I understand why people say, just
• 2:07:45
  Speaker 2: admit you're gay. But there's a difference. And I can't
• 2:07:48
  Speaker 2: describe the difference, but I understand the difference internally. If
• 2:07:52
  Speaker 2: I was a homosexual at this age, I would tell people,
• 2:07:54
  Speaker 2: I don't give a fuck. like if oh yeah like
• 2:07:56
  Speaker 2: i it's not a that i'm running away from saying
• 2:07:59
  Speaker 2: something that people think i should say um you know
• 2:08:03
  Speaker 2: sometimes i miss vaginas i mean i like them yeah
• 2:08:06
  Speaker 2: but but hey here we are here we are and happy.
• 2:08:11
  Speaker 1: And happy there you go brother Oh yeah. That thing
• 2:08:14
  Speaker 1: is a damn God. That thing's a damn lunchable you
• 2:08:17
  Speaker 1: got going on.
• 2:08:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:08:17
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 2:08:18
  Speaker 2: You got to respect it. Yeah.
• 2:08:20
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 2:08:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:08:20
  Speaker 2: Anyone's got to respect that. Like even somebody who's not
• 2:08:23
  Speaker 2: into that lifestyle would go, you know what? Round of applause. Yeah, sir. Yeah.
• 2:08:29
  Speaker 1: Um, unconceivable is, uh, is on YouTube now. And, um,
• 2:08:33
  Speaker 1: always thanks for all the entertainment, man. Thanks for welcoming
• 2:08:35
  Speaker 1: me on your show.
• 2:08:36
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 2:08:36
  Speaker 1: Give me a chance to, uh, just, just get to
• 2:08:39
  Speaker 1: ever even be on a radio show and make it fun. And, um,
• 2:08:42
  Speaker 1: or on a podcast, you guys were kind of in
• 2:08:44
  Speaker 1: that early realm of, it was kind of a hodgepodge
• 2:08:46
  Speaker 1: in there.
• 2:08:46
  Speaker 2: It was, it was, uh, yeah. I mean, podcasting, I
• 2:08:49
  Speaker 2: remember Mark Maron used to occasionally when he was in town,
• 2:08:51
  Speaker 2: if he needed a studio to interview someone who would
• 2:08:53
  Speaker 2: use our productions to like, we were there at the very,
• 2:08:56
  Speaker 2: very beginning and good luck. Uh, I didn't see it coming.
• 2:09:00
  Speaker 2: I mean, I knew it was going to be popular
• 2:09:02
  Speaker 2: and I had a radio contract, but I didn't, uh,
• 2:09:05
  Speaker 2: I wish I had jumped on it earlier, but I
• 2:09:07
  Speaker 2: wasn't allowed to, I had a, I had a exclusivity contract.
• 2:09:10
  Speaker 2: But whatever. Who gives a fuck, Jim? Yeah.
• 2:09:12
  Speaker 1: Well, you've been I think you've done the best job
• 2:09:15
  Speaker 1: of being Jim Norton, man, from an outsider perspective.
• 2:09:17
  Speaker 2: It's been interesting.
• 2:09:18
  Speaker 1: I think you're an inspiration for people to try and
• 2:09:21
  Speaker 1: figure out how to best be themselves. I know it's
• 2:09:23
  Speaker 1: a journey for everybody, but I think it's cool, man.
• 2:09:25
  Speaker 1: I think it's interesting. You seem like kind of like
• 2:09:26
  Speaker 1: a person that's kind of brave in the world.
• 2:09:29
  Speaker 2: Well, I appreciate that, but it really is, and none
• 2:09:32
  Speaker 2: of my, I haven't lost any friends over my life. Like,
• 2:09:35
  Speaker 2: you know what I mean? Like, whoever doesn't like, I wouldn't,
• 2:09:37
  Speaker 2: there's no one I wouldn't cut loose.
• 2:09:39
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 2:09:39
  Speaker 2: Like, you know what I mean? I have my friends.
• 2:09:40
  Speaker 2: I have no shame in that part of my life and.
• 2:09:43
  Speaker 3: Who I love.
• 2:09:44
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. It doesn't seem like it at all. It's
• 2:09:46
  Speaker 2: a fun life, so I'm very lucky. I appreciate you
• 2:09:48
  Speaker 2: having me on, man. I love what you do. Yeah,
• 2:09:49
  Speaker 2: I got to come do yours before the end of
• 2:09:51
  Speaker 2: the year. Yeah, I would love that. I would really
• 2:09:52
  Speaker 2: love that. We'll make it happen, man. Thanks, pal. Jim Norton,
• 2:09:55
  Speaker 2: thank you so much. Thank you, Theo.
• 2:09:56
  Speaker 3: Thank you. Now I'm just floating on the breeze, and
• 2:10:00
  Speaker 3: I feel I'm falling like these leaves. I must be cornerstone. Oh,
• 2:10:09
  Speaker 3: but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace
• 2:10:12
  Speaker 3: of mind I found.
• 2:10:13
  Speaker 2: I can feel it in my bones.