Latest / Life Rescue with Lisa Dwoskin / Why So Many Women Feel Emotionally Exhausted Today
Transcript
- Lisa Dwoskin: Hi and welcome back to Life Rescue Podcast with Lisa. Welcome everybody. I am going to start today with some deep breathing because I don't know about all of you, but I definitely need it. So I want you all to close your eyes, put your hands in either prayer position or palms up or however you want, whatever makes you comfortable. Breathe in beautiful, positive energy. Hold your breath and exhale fully. any negative energy or whatever is not serving your highest good. So I'm going to do prayer position on the second breath. Breathe in. Exhale. So I'm breathing in peace, love and light and I'm exhaling stress, fear or worry one more time. Breathe in big, deep breath, positive energy, exhale any negative energy. And here we go. Look at my shirt, love, believe and dream. So I woke up today, not feeling so great, not as positive as I like to be. So what did I do? I put my crystals on. I have some lavender incense burning next to me. I put this shirt on that makes me feel, you know, like my thoughts of positive affirmations, love, believe and dream. So the topic today is about why so many women are feeling emotionally exhausted. And before I jump into this episode, want to just be honest and true and authentic with all of you. I am emotionally exhausted myself. I am definitely overwhelmed, feeling exhausted, feeling stressed out, and it happens to the best of us. We are all human beings. So it happens. And I have no shame in saying that. I am one of these women and that's why I am doing this episode not only for all of you but for myself. So let's jump right into it. So many women are emotionally exhausted right now and they don't even realize how depleted they become. It happens gradually. It doesn't happen all at once. But at some point you realize as a woman, and this happens to men as well, but this topic is mainly for women, you don't even realize it. It chips away at you very slowly, but surely until one morning you wake up and you're like, you can't even move. And you wonder, how did I get here? What happened? What is going on? So that's what I want to talk about today. What emotional exhaustion looks like. Okay. A couple of bullet points that you can definitely be aware of and notice that you might be doing in your own life. And this is pointing to emotional exhaustion. You're snapping easily at the people around you. Every little thing starts to bother you. You start feeling numb. You wake up and you're like, just numb. You don't have that mojo. You don't have that spark that spunk that bounce in your step. You kind of just like feel numb. You are overthinking everything constantly. You're it affects your sleep. It affects your days. You don't have that ease, that peace. You're just constantly thinking and going and you're like spiraling into this tornado. You're always tired. Yes, always tired. You're taking care of everyone else first. You can be functioning and still be completely drained. So I want to go over these things. Okay. Am I snapping easily at people around me? Yes, for sure. Because I am exhausted and I'm not feeling like my usual self. So every little thing is driving me nuts in the house with my family members. So yes, I'm definitely doing that. Feeling numb, as far as me, I don't really feel so numb all the time. There's moments that I feel numb, but I'm definitely a person who can easily turn my day around. Maybe not as easy as I used to. And when I feel emotionally exhausted, it's a little bit harder. But like I said, I put on my crystals. I do my incense. I have my waterfall. I go to yoga. I do everything and anything to get myself out of that feeling numb mode. I power walk. And when things are exhausting and I'm overwhelmed, I always have the energy to get my body moving. And that helps so much, so much. Always tired. Yes, I definitely feel that. And I have had my hormones checked. I'm on HRT, progesterone, estrogen. So I know that that's in check. And I know that I am now wearing a Fitbit that my dad bought me. I'm so excited about it. Cause now I'm tracking my sleep patterns to see like what's going on. And the one overthinking, I noticed that I wake up a lot throughout the night because I'm overthinking constantly. So taking care of everyone else first, I've always been doing that my whole life. Although in the last six months, This year and even last year, I told myself, no, I'm not going to constantly take care of everyone else first. I am taking care of myself, but it's a work in progress. So definitely put yourself first, take care of yourself and do good for yourself because when your cup is empty, you cannot fill anybody else's cup. So take care of you. Why does this happen? Why do we become so emotionally drained and overwhelmed, especially women more than men, constant pressure, no boundaries, over giving social media comparison and hormonal shifts. let's break this all down. Constant pressure. Okay. Here's a key point for you ladies who are watching and the men, this could relate to some men. I put pressure on myself. So I have no one else to blame but myself. I am constantly driving, striving, moving forward in my career. I want to get my TV show out there. I want this podcast to help others and grow to a larger scale. I want to get on stages and help people. I want to be real, true and authentic about what we women are suffering with and men and society, mental health awareness, obesity. So I have constant pressure that I put on myself. I only have myself to blame. And that's very important because a lot of you out there are pointing the fingers and blaming everyone else. And it's not their fault. It's your fault, my fault. I put pressure on myself and that's okay, I'm never gonna change that. I want to be the best version of myself. So I will keep putting pressure on myself. But here's the good news, which is the next point. I have put up boundaries, because I used to not have any boundaries. Now I have boundaries. I definitely say no a lot more than I used to. I take care of myself. Like I said, first and foremost, it's very important. If you're going to constantly put pressure on yourself, make sure you put up your boundaries so that you also can take care of yourself. Overgiving that, I will always do. I'm never going to change that. I'm always going to give, but like I said, I also give to myself so that my cup is not empty. Social media comparison, okay, I can definitely say I have grown and learned and matured into not comparing myself to others on social media. Maybe that's because I'm 55 years old when I was in my 40s, 30s. I did that, but not as much anymore because I really don't compare myself to others because I really don't care. Remember this it's none of your business what other people think of you as long as you love yourself and you're kind to yourself and you're worthy you feel worthy you don't need to compare yourself to others so if you're doing that try to stop doing that by giving yourself more love and more self-worth and self-esteem and self-respect that I can tell you happens when you're late 40s and 50s, you stop caring so much about what other people think and it's the greatest thing ever. I have worked on myself for years and years and years and I will continue to do so. I have finally learned how to love myself and respect myself enough to not care what others think of me. And the more haters I have, the more I welcome it because I'm doing something right. Okay, hormonal shifts, life transitions, I already talked about that. If you're between the age of 35 and 65, which most of my viewers are, get your hormones checked, do your blood work. Because we women suffer from paramenopause, menopause, post menopause. If your hormones are not in check, that can drive you crazy. And you don't want to suffer if you don't have to suffer. I'm not a doctor. I can't prescribe anything, but I can tell you what worked for me is definitely hormone replacement therapy has helped wonderful for me. So check that out. Okay. How to start healing, how to start healing your emotional exhaustion and overwhelm this and how to start taking care of yourself. Rest without guilt. So I like to take naps almost every day if I can. Some days I can't, but I used to feel bad like, ⁓ God, I'm taking a nap. What are people gonna think about that? That's selfish. I'm not going, going, going, driving, driving, striving, moving. My father raised me to work, work, work, work. And sometimes my kids are like, why do you have to take a nap or whatever? I don't feel guilty about it. If my body feels better with a 20 minute nap, 30 minute nap, I'm going to do it without guilt because I need it. I like it. I deserve it. So why not stop feeling guilty about what makes you feel better boundaries? I already talked about it. Keep building those boundaries around you. to care for yourself because you need to take care of you. Movement, movement, that I have no issue with. I'm a fitness professional, personal trainer, life coach. I have been moving my body since I came out of my mom's body. Move, move, and remember, raise your energetic vibe. Woo, yes, yes. See, I'm already starting to feel better. My voice is starting to change. I'm starting to wake up and feel more energized because I'm doing this video here and I'm raising my energetic vibe. took my deep breaths. I'm moving a lot. Movement. Walking is amazing. I'm doing 10,000 steps or more a day and my body's loving it. I love it spiritually, physically, and mentally. It helps you to move. So keep moving. Time alone. ⁓ time alone is so important. Whether you're in a relationship, not in a relationship, your kids live with you, don't live with you, whatever is going on in your life. Take time alone. If I don't have time alone every single day, I start to get very agitated and irritable because I'm training clients in real life. I'm training clients on zoom, I'm doing podcasts, I'm getting my TV show out there. I live with five, a family of five. So there's always people around. I need time alone to just chill and be peaceful. And that's when I go to yoga, I meditate, I do my walking, I do breathing, I sit outside with our waterfalls, with the Buddhas. Any time alone is good time spent with yourself. Saying no, already covered that. Saying no, stop saying yes to everybody. And if they don't like when you say no, too bad. You have to say no to make yourself better. So let me give a couple of examples while I take a sip of my water real quick. Hydration, remember ⁓ VOL 528 Hertz, water, check it out. And people are asking me why my water changes colors. It's because my spiritual magic. No, it's my electrolytes and my favorite color is purple, they're purple. Electrolytes are so important, but also this water is great. It's infused with sound vibration. Check it out on our Instagram account. But I always add extra electrolytes to everything. So a couple of examples. Okay, saying no. So I have a client who told me a story about a friend of hers who invited her over for a brunch, but she wasn't feeling well. So she said she couldn't do it and the friend got upset. Now she's a little bit younger than me. And I remember those days when my friends would get upset. And it would bother me and I'd feel guilty about it. But you know what? Nowadays, if my friends don't like it, I don't need them as friends. If they can't understand that when I say no, I don't want to go because I don't feel good or I'm tired or I want to spend time with my family. Then I don't need those kinds of friends in my life because let me tell you true friends who care about you understand and want you happy. So The friends that I have now, which went from tons of friends to a handful of friends, but they're quality friends. None of them get upset at me. If I want to spend time with my family and I cancel on them, they're like, okay, great. If I don't feel good, they tell me to feel better. So definitely you have to say no for what's best for you. So my family, my dad, my brother, my kids, even my in-laws, they came in town. They want to spend time with all of us and I did. But when I'm tired at night, I go to sleep, even if it's two hours before they all go to sleep and they understand. And I used to worry like, ⁓ I don't want to offend my mother-in-law or father-in-law. But you know what? I get to the point where I took care of myself. And that's what's important. And they didn't get offended. And Brian, my partner, he understands too. I would feel guilty. Like, I'm sorry, I'm not staying up with you and your parents all night, but I'm tired. And he would always tell me, no, take care of you. So it was me feeling guilty for saying no. It wasn't the people around me. So try not to feel guilty for saying no. Do what's best for you and your healing. Okay, it's so important. The last one asking for help. Sometimes you need help. So I have a therapist, Brian has a therapist, my kids, I made them go to therapy. I you know, they're now 19 and 21. So I can't make them anymore. But I think therapy is great. Coaching is great when things go. south or I'm going through some things. I called my therapist last night. I have an appointment with her tomorrow. Why? Because I'm not feeling okay. I'm feeling overwhelmed and I need a outsider, a coach to point things out to me that maybe I'm not seeing myself. So yes, I'm a coach, but I'm a coach who needs a coach. All coaches need coaches. All people need guidance. It's okay to ask for help. Don't forget what I said earlier. You can't pour from an empty cup. So pour that cup by taking care of you and asking for help. That's okay. emotional exhaustion is not weakness. That's so important. That's like what I just said. And this is for the men out there who think, you know, their egos and their pride, they can't ask for help. They're strong. They're like lions in the ⁓ jungle. But asking for help is not weakness. Emotional exhaustion is not weakness. It's human. We are humans. We have to remember that. It's a signal when you're emotionally exhausted. It's a signal that your body and mind are asking for change. Now this is a big, big one. Change is something that a lot of us are afraid of, we fear. Although, if you're emotionally exhausted more than you're up and happy and positive and joyful and energetic, then something needs to change in your life. And that's my biggest issue. I constantly do the same thing like that. definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome, like the gerbil running in the cage. It's hard for me to change. I don't have a lot of fears around change. I just get comfortable and don't want to change sometimes, but I need to because when I am constantly emotionally exhausted, which I've been lately, then I know that I have to make changes in my life so that I feel my mojo again. I raise my energetic vibe, yes. And I start feeling alive again and joyful and not this lower energetic vibe that you even hear in my voice because I'm exhausted. So change is coming and I am making changes in my life to... make myself less emotionally exhausted. And I want you all to make good changes in your life and not be emotionally exhausted all the time. Once in a while, yes, but all the time, no. You don't need to become someone new. You just need to come back to yourself, to come back to yourself. And with that said, I wanna do just one minute of some grounding work. I want you to put your hands down on the ground on whatever you're sitting on, on earth, I'm on a Pilates bed, so I'm touching the ground. And I want you to close your eyes and breathe in beautiful grounding, centering, balancing, breathing in. Hold your breath and exhale fully. And this time, just be still instead of taking two more breaths. Just take a moment with stillness, quiet, balancing, centering, grounding yourself with Mother Earth, with the planet, with the ground underneath you. Take a moment, just breathe in. and then bring your hands to prayer position, open your eyes and just think peace, love and light. I hope this helped you. I hope this grounded you, centered you, balanced you, made you more aware of how to cope, deal and change your emotional overwhelm this, your emotional. feeling of being drained of feeling overwhelmed. So what I want you to do is call me at 754-222-4413. Leave me a message. Let me know did this episode help you to feel less overwhelmed and less drain and give you more energy to tackle your day and do this all over again day after day after day. Raise your energetic vibe. Please do me a favor, like and share this episode if it resonated with you. If you know a friend that it could help, please let me know. Remember seven five four two two two four four one three. Just let me know how this made you feel. Leave a comment or talk about your story. Leave me a message, a text, or let me know. a subject that you want to talk about on the next episode. So have a beautiful and blessed day. Remember, love, believe and dream. Have a beautiful day. Namaste.