Latest / In the Valley of Giants / The Rabbi’s Responsibility: Leading Fragile Hearts | Rabbi Daniel Glatstein | ITVOG Ep. 14
Transcript
- 0:00I think part of the, the weakness of this generation is
- 0:03the, the weakness of, of leadership in the sense of, I
- 0:07think a lot of leaders are looking behind their shoulder to
- 0:11see what the people want them to say because they're afraid of
- 0:15ruffling fat, you know, anyone's feather fat, they're afraid of
- 0:18rubbing someone the wrong way. Basically, people are afraid to
- 0:21speak the truth in this generation, you know?
- 0:29Thank you so much for coming in. Excited to speak to you today.
- 0:33So one of the things I wanted to ask you about is you are very
- 0:37involved with education as well as abroad, Hashem.
- 0:41And the way that has worked previously up until very
- 0:44recently is that you can teach a few Tomidam, you can teach a
- 0:48few, you read them, but you cannot teach people that are on
- 0:51the other side of the world. And that is something we have
- 0:53access to now. And I'm assuming that because of
- 0:55that, you're also fielding a little bit of questions from
- 0:57perhaps different parts of the world as well.
- 0:59So as someone who does that and is having your own Keela, So
- 1:03what what are some challenges do you think are really important
- 1:06at the clients for all? Now that is right to speak
- 1:09about, right for people to know about.
- 1:10And and as being in someone in your position who is the Rev of
- 1:13a Shoal and manages families and people of all ages, what are you
- 1:16seeing down the line? What's everyone dealing with?
- 1:20What are people dealing with? OK, that's a loaded question.
- 1:28What are the challenges that people are dealing with in 2025,
- 1:33soon to be 2026? There are a myriad of challenges
- 1:39people are dealing with. One we alluded to in what we
- 1:42were speaking about before that we live in the a world of
- 1:47information. There's more information
- 1:49available today than there ever was.
- 1:51There's no question that we have more information than our
- 1:53parents, our grandparents, our great grandparents, not only in
- 1:56the secular world, but in Tyra, when a Yomtiff comes, we know
- 2:00more about Yomtiff than our grandparents did.
- 2:01There's no question, you know, wherever our grandparents came
- 2:04from. So maybe they knew the they knew
- 2:08Kitzer Shulkanara, and maybe they knew the Gomorrah and they
- 2:11knew the background, or maybe they knew some Svarum.
- 2:14But in today's world, the the full gamut of information from
- 2:19all backgrounds of the Jewish people, whether it's Kabbalah,
- 2:24Svardik, Hasidic, different countries, is now at everybody's
- 2:29fingertips. And everybody is bombarded with
- 2:32Shurim and messages of what Yom Tif's all about and what this
- 2:37mitzvah is all about and what this man is all about.
- 2:40So we have a lot of information that we know, but on the other
- 2:44hand, I don't think that the information that we know is as
- 2:48close to our hearts as it was to our grandparents and our great
- 2:52grandparents. What do you mean there's less of
- 2:54a Rochem? Is that what you're?
- 2:55Implying I think it less of a Rochem, in other words.
- 2:58So I think we live in the generation of artificial
- 3:00intelligence. Why is that?
- 3:04A maybe because we're so bombarded by the information.
- 3:08So our our knowledge of it is very superficial.
- 3:14I also think it's because of our immersion in Gashmius.
- 3:18OK, that sort of I think dulls are spiritual senses.
- 3:23Like because of hedonistically because we're.
- 3:25Just, I don't know if it's because we're, I wouldn't say
- 3:30necessarily that we're ballet taiva, but you know, I'll just
- 3:36give you a simple example. You know, when I was a kid,
- 3:38Shabbos meal is gefilte fish and chicken and potato cogol.
- 3:44Now it's gefilte fish and how many dips people have, and not
- 3:49just regular khala. You have to have this kind of
- 3:51khala, that kind of khala, just the abundance of bracha that we
- 3:56live with. And obviously in America it's to
- 4:00a greater extreme, but I'm sure in arts Israel, more than it was
- 4:0330 years ago or 20 years ago or even 10 years ago.
- 4:05Sure. The the more a person partakes
- 4:08of gashmias, the more their spiritual senses are dulled.
- 4:11Bishami, you shouldn't believe it.
- 4:14It's almost like ma ya sahabenshala yekta.
- 4:17So you know, we want Hashem to continue it.
- 4:20We hope Hashem always continues to shower us with bracha, but it
- 4:25does to a certain extent jade our spiritual, the acuity of our
- 4:31spiritual senses. So that's one area that we that
- 4:35we deal with. Another area is but.
- 4:37Before you go on to that, what's the response to that so
- 4:40precious? So if that's an issue, so then
- 4:42what's the response? Maybe it's deeper conversations
- 4:47with our children and when we're younger to appreciate the the
- 4:51the guidelines that we do have. I think, I think the, the way I
- 4:56don't know, I don't know if that it's, it's precious, but I think
- 5:00it's inculcating something called not increasing our our
- 5:07physical intake, which means that every year they're, they
- 5:13come up with more ways to satisfy your physical palate.
- 5:18You know, there are more flavors of each kind of food.
- 5:21There are more kinds of each kind of food where a person
- 5:24creates a certain guideline. You could call it precious, but
- 5:26you know, I'm not, I'm not advocating fasting or
- 5:30abstaining. It's more like, OK, I don't, I
- 5:32don't need, I don't need more. I don't need that.
- 5:35I don't need the newest in terms of physical intake.
- 5:41But practically, what does that look like?
- 5:42Like what? So what would we call that on to
- 5:44do? So you want them to not have the
- 5:46third Shalom on Shabbos and not go to the Kidders Club like.
- 5:50I'm I don't know. People who know me know that I I
- 5:53compare the Kidders club to Adam Harishine, the head of Adam
- 5:56Harishine Kidders show. You mean during the avening?
- 5:59That's I'm not no, no, Van, no, I'm the third.
- 6:02Yeah, I would say, you know, you let you enjoy your chill hunt,
- 6:05right? You don't need to have VIP chill
- 6:07hunt where do that. Why don't bring that into your
- 6:09life. Don't bring in the new flavour,
- 6:11but is a. Mammon who are Mashman, Right?
- 6:13The Balmor. The what the Balmor is is a
- 6:16Mammon who are Mashman, right? It's called by the Misha Brewer,
- 6:18I think. Or maybe he's in charts.
- 6:19Yeah, I'm not. Familiar.
- 6:20Yeah, but onic but onic Chavez is a mammon who are mashman you
- 6:23you fan themselves on Chavez and you know protects bionic you.
- 6:26You could enjoy, but not to not to hide in physical intake.
- 6:33So in other words, the Gras also says that the the the main
- 6:39Yeatsahara comes from eating on Shabbos and Yomtiff.
- 6:43The villain says in in his Paris Jean Michele that the the main
- 6:47power of the eatsahara comes from the rationale.
- 6:50You know, it's covered Shabbos, it's covered Yomtiff.
- 6:53So you know, it was just Hanukkah, right.
- 6:56So when I was a kid, they had, I mean it, it's a silly topic, but
- 7:00they had Jelly doughnuts and they had custard doughnuts.
- 7:02Now every year they invent. I went to the store, they were
- 7:05putting liver in their doughnuts.
- 7:08What's wrong with this? What's what's wrong?
- 7:10If you want to eat liver, eat liver.
- 7:11If you want to eat a doughnut, eat doughnut.
- 7:13But now they're coming up with different, they're inventing
- 7:16Taiva. You know, the Ramban says
- 7:18something very frightening. And, and our Rosh Hashiba used
- 7:22to say this a lot. You know, we live in a in a
- 7:23generation where there's such moral cloudiness even in the way
- 7:29people identify themselves. Zahar Nikiva, where did it?
- 7:34Where did it come from? So the, you know, there's a
- 7:37Ramban. The Ramban says in the past, the
- 7:40matter of voice, hara hara of ES hatsumaya.
- 7:46The Ramban says that when people increase their Taiba then they
- 7:54experience a need to try to intake Taiva they never had
- 7:59before. So then psychologically, a
- 8:02person will then develop a need to do something that's connected
- 8:07their nature. What do you mean by that?
- 8:11It's pretty self understood. In other words, the way that
- 8:15Taiva works, the way that desire works, is that once you
- 8:19experience it, you want something more.
- 8:21And if that more doesn't exist, then you'll desire things that
- 8:24are against normal human nature. OK, so, so it's dangerous.
- 8:33It's dangerous. You know, you could have your
- 8:35doughnut, but now you're going to start, you know, this year.
- 8:39What's the new flavor? Why does there have to be a new
- 8:41flavor? Did you enjoy it last year?
- 8:43So enjoy it this year. And that, that itself is
- 8:46precious, that itself keeping it in check.
- 8:48You mean being on guard, You know, you have a certain kind of
- 8:51car. So now, oh, now they have a
- 8:54newer version with a, with a, a newer accessory.
- 8:58Don't get it, don't get it. They have whatever it is in
- 9:01life. It's not to keep things at the
- 9:04current level. Is is a form of precious which
- 9:07is realistic in times that we live in.
- 9:10And how would you do that with kids?
- 9:13How would you do that with kids? They want the new toy, they want
- 9:15the new face comic book, even the, the, the, the from stuff
- 9:19that they have. Some of it is great.
- 9:21How are we, how are we passing that message on?
- 9:23Because you don't need to start with adults and we can start
- 9:25with children. So how would we start with
- 9:26children? If we're going to work
- 9:28backwards, right? We're going to get this Chr out
- 9:30of us. How do we do that?
- 9:37Look, when the child reaches a, a, a, a certain age, they're
- 9:41going to want something appropriate for that age.
- 9:46Yeah. So there's a way to determine
- 9:51what's appropriate and what's next level.
- 9:55And there's nothing wrong with telling a kid.
- 9:57OK, you know, you got something for your birthday present at 10.
- 10:01Now you're 11 years old, I want you to get something
- 10:03appropriate. Yeah, but did you see what they
- 10:05have now? OK, so let's break it down.
- 10:08But you know, they had something really good last year and I
- 10:12think you're old enough to get in.
- 10:13You really appreciate it and I'm going to, you know, it has to be
- 10:18a balanced decision. It's very interesting.
- 10:19Rashi says that on last week that when you when Yehuda came
- 10:25down to Mitzrayim before everybody else.
- 10:27So Rashi says that they send Yehuda the higher rest of the
- 10:31fund of Goshna. So Rashi brings down the Derek
- 10:33Hazel that Yehuda was sent to establish a yeshiva.
- 10:37But the Mehrus brings 2 opinions.
- 10:38The Mehrus brings an opinion that he was sent to build a
- 10:41house. You need Yehuda, you need the
- 10:43Ghadar to build a house. You get get an architect, get a
- 10:48construction worker. Why Yehuda, the Ghadar has to be
- 10:51sent to build a house? No, because look, when they were
- 10:55living in in arts Israel, so they could live a certain way,
- 11:01maybe a more modest lifestyle. They're not the brothers or the
- 11:05family of the king. So in terms of determining how
- 11:11do we employ the values of the, of ice from Hebraim to Mitzrayim
- 11:17in new circumstance. So we need a God, al Hadar to be
- 11:21able to make that balanced decision.
- 11:23Our values of discipline, of modesty, of, of not living
- 11:29luxuriously, but that has to be balanced with the fact.
- 11:32But now we're coming down, we're representing Yosef, the king of
- 11:34the world. We need a Yehuda to make that
- 11:36call. So no, he's not sent down to
- 11:38make you shave. He's sent down to determine like
- 11:41what the what the blinds are going to look like on the
- 11:43windows and what the trimmings are going to look like on in the
- 11:47dining room. So it needs a lot of balance to
- 11:51determine, you know, what's excessive, what's appropriate,
- 11:54what's no, that's not right. You're treating the kid that
- 11:57way. You know the kid needs a certain
- 12:00present for whatever occasion it is.
- 12:02So am I you Hooda in my house? Is that the implication?
- 12:04What am I Hooda in my house? Is that the implication?
- 12:07You're, yes, you are you Hooda in your house.
- 12:10And maybe these are things that parents should discuss with
- 12:15their rabbonium. In other words, how do they
- 12:18guide their family? You know, what kind of things do
- 12:21they buy? What kind of lifestyle do they
- 12:22live? What's appropriate in accordance
- 12:25with their means and accordance with their neighborhood in
- 12:27accordance with their family circumstance.
- 12:30You made an implication before that you feel that it's a bigger
- 12:32problem in America versus Eritrea versus the last 30 years
- 12:35here. What did you mean by that?
- 12:39I'm just my. My.
- 12:42Observation is that in the American lifestyle is a higher
- 12:48level of. Decadence.
- 12:51Gosh, me. Yes, yeah.
- 12:52You know, in America you have to have a car.
- 12:55You know, you have to have a certain kind of, you have to
- 12:58live in a house. Who doesn't live in a house in
- 13:00America? You know, in Israel these are
- 13:03not Givens, right? You know what a yumptif meal
- 13:07looks like in America is, you know, 5 notches above.
- 13:12I think what a I'm imagining what it looks like in arts
- 13:15Israel. So it's a bigger challenge in in
- 13:19America. OK, all right.
- 13:23What was the second I I interrupted you.
- 13:24So that was that was issue #1 what's another issue that you
- 13:27think is really hush of that people should be aware of?
- 13:35Many people today are emotionally very fragile.
- 13:40More than another times today, a kid could say, you know, I'm
- 13:48traumatized. I'm traumatized.
- 13:50You know, you go, you go in the store and you hear a kid tell
- 13:54his mother, you don't know what happened today.
- 13:55The teacher looked at me, Roy, I'm traumatized now.
- 13:59It could be it's just like they they just throw out that word
- 14:02out trauma, trauma. But people are saying they feel
- 14:08that they have had trauma in their lives.
- 14:11And yet I knew my grandfather, who was a Holocaust survivor,
- 14:17and I, I read in his writings that he describes what the
- 14:20Warsaw Ghetto looked like, how there were rivers of blood
- 14:23flowing through the streets of Warsaw with skeletons and bodies
- 14:27lying around in a Dome. And he was, he lived a very
- 14:30happy life where he gave of himself to counsel others.
- 14:36And it's like it's, it's ironic. It's difficult to understand how
- 14:43people who saw what the last generation saw and didn't
- 14:48necessarily seem to have been so traumatized.
- 14:50And yet people in this generation, they experience a
- 14:54little bit of difficulty and they feel that they they're,
- 14:57they have to deal with trauma in their life.
- 14:59So the main reason for that is people today are not emotionally
- 15:03as strong as they once were. I don't, I can't explain it.
- 15:09Maybe it has to do with the physical intake.
- 15:12In other words, you know they're they, haven't I?
- 15:14Think it's probably a cryos. I mean, no one takes a cryos for
- 15:16anything anymore. So you don't actually have to be
- 15:18anything or do anything. Everything's just done for you.
- 15:21So you have. No, you know, we'll have though.
- 15:24It's like someone who wants to go to a gymnasium and he wants
- 15:26to build his muscles or something.
- 15:28OK, You go and you push and your muscles get bigger.
- 15:30So yeah, the children I feel, especially in this store, they
- 15:33just have no a cryos. I mean, growing up, I had
- 15:37responsibilities. Yeah, the door that I see coming
- 15:41up, they they don't even take out the trash.
- 15:43They have zero responsibility. So there's no resiliency.
- 15:46Something didn't go my way. I'm upset.
- 15:48ABBA, fix it. Talk to you.
- 15:49Fix it, Mommy, fix it. That's that's the I'll give you
- 15:52another example. A couple years ago, there was a
- 15:54boy that I needed to take his phone away.
- 15:56Was not good for him, especially him.
- 16:00So I took it away. So he said, but Rebbe, how am I
- 16:03going to get to the to the bus station now it's impossible for
- 16:06me to get to the bus station. I'm going to have to borrow
- 16:08another phone to call my father. Like what am I going to do?
- 16:10I'm completely stuck you I'm stranded.
- 16:13So when I was here in I came up with something brand new at the
- 16:17time it was called MapQuest. You went on the computer and you
- 16:20waited like 3 minutes because there's a dial up connection.
- 16:23Yeah. And I told you more or less had
- 16:25to get somewhere. And guess what?
- 16:26When it didn't work, I guessed I spoke to someone figured it out.
- 16:30I would have had a dictionary on me when I was doing my nerves.
- 16:32So often I need to do something. Why?
- 16:34Because it's not backing me up. I got to do something.
- 16:36I got to take care of myself. Maybe the reason why people are
- 16:38so delicate is because they have everything at their fingertips
- 16:42at all times, especially have you know, they have they have
- 16:46video games, they have phones, which it's just like constant
- 16:50entertainment and and and and whenever you want it any second.
- 16:54Maybe that's it. That may be a contributing
- 17:00factor, yeah. But I think the the response to
- 17:04that is very similar to what you were saying before.
- 17:06I think kids need kids need #1 limitations that you can't give
- 17:10them everything that they want all the time, right?
- 17:12So that that Gashmius the decadence that you're talking
- 17:14about. I'm asking, but I think maybe
- 17:16it's important also for our kids to to take a cries, you know, if
- 17:22a kitchen have chores, I think that's a double push it.
- 17:24And I don't think that it's a double push it to everyone.
- 17:26That's number one. But number 2 is the teacher
- 17:28looked at you the wrong way. OK, so why don't you go speak to
- 17:31the teacher very respectfully. No, I'm traumatized.
- 17:34OK, well, you have to work through that trauma.
- 17:36So you should speak to the teacher and Devark, is that
- 17:38right? The child is asking you because
- 17:40the child wants you to call the teacher.
- 17:42Child wants you to tell off the teacher, right?
- 17:45I think that that that that might be helpful.
- 17:47OK, I think there's, you know, there's an important point in
- 17:51what you're saying, but but still the emotional makeup of a
- 17:55person today is. No, but this is this could be
- 17:59why, like you, you said your it was your your grandfather was an
- 18:02Holocaust survivor. OK.
- 18:03So I knew Holocaust survivors growing up and then there was a
- 18:06tremendous amount of stuff that they had to share.
- 18:09Our children have no idea what that is.
- 18:11They never knew Holocaust survivors.
- 18:13You know, we're Klishlishi, we're not Mavashal.
- 18:15They're Klichamishi's clear Raviz.
- 18:17They're not even Yatzel. Let us go.
- 18:18They, they, they, they have, they don't know what it's like
- 18:21to to to, to, to experience hardship, you know, but so, so
- 18:26that's what I'm saying. They need, they need access to
- 18:28that. You know, I also don't know how
- 18:30much, how much do we talk about the Holocaust with our children
- 18:33or pogroms. I'm not saying that we need to
- 18:35scare them like, you know, oddly die.
- 18:37I don't think that's very smart. That might be really
- 18:39traumatizing to just do that, but just say that, you know,
- 18:42cholesterol has been around for a long time and, you know,
- 18:45things, things are difficult. There are ups and downs, Of
- 18:47course. Brock, who gives us a crisis
- 18:49instead of just living in a fairy tale and that everything's
- 18:51going to be. You know, you can't hide it
- 18:53because a couple years ago we had October 7th and if a kid
- 18:55never heard about the Holocaust and all of a sudden they're
- 18:58suddenly they're, they're, they're told about this event
- 19:01that happened on, on October 7th.
- 19:02They have no context to view it. And they think, well, you know,
- 19:05life is Disneyland. Right.
- 19:07Were you shocked by some Costera?
- 19:08Were you shocked when that happened?
- 19:11I was saddened. I was not shocked.
- 19:13Shocked. I was not sure, but I feel that
- 19:18that the people that the next door, they were, they were
- 19:20shocked. But how could such a thing
- 19:22happen? OK, I, you know, we could, we
- 19:26could try to uncover the the cause of why people are more
- 19:32emotionally fragile, but they are the amount of anxiety that
- 19:36people have, the amount of emotional distress that people
- 19:40have is rampant. As as.
- 19:43Maybe it always was, and maybe just because life was more
- 19:48difficult, they didn't have the opportunity to dwell on it and
- 19:51to deal with it. But because our lives are in
- 19:54general easier and better, many people are suffering from
- 20:00emotional distress, and it's important to be aware of that.
- 20:04You know that. The same way, you know, people's
- 20:09heart goes out to people who are in the hospital and they have a
- 20:12physical ailment. People need to be aware that the
- 20:17the Harusa sitting next to them who looks like he's learning
- 20:20well, right? Or.
- 20:23Anyone in their life could could be suffering and you know it.
- 20:29It heightens the the importance of giving people Khazuk.
- 20:33Right. Of giving people a kind word and
- 20:38you know, the tell me them here ultimately, one day they want to
- 20:42have the opportunity to share what they're learning with
- 20:44others. And a big part of that is to to
- 20:48try to help build people up because people need it tonight.
- 20:52As a as a Rev, how do you how do you manage that when you're
- 20:56trying to you want to give physical with all you know,
- 20:59sometimes there could be a lot of sensitivities and
- 21:01negativities. What would be an ace that you'd
- 21:03give to leaders growing up? What can we look for?
- 21:07What should we be looking for? Looking for and what?
- 21:10And and how to properly lead an AM, how to properly lead a
- 21:13Kahila like knowing those sensitivities, anxiety,
- 21:17etcetera, what can we really be giving families and especially
- 21:20children? It's a very, it's a very good
- 21:23question because on the one hand you need to be aware of this,
- 21:25but it's not necessarily the role of the Rava Rasha Shiva to
- 21:30be able to help people in this area because most Rab on him are
- 21:34not formally trained as a psychologist or social worker.
- 21:41And I think a lot of Rob on him get themselves into messes,
- 21:46creeping into people's personal issues when they are more
- 21:52correctly should be referring them to somebody who's
- 21:55specialized in this area. I'm just saying that there needs
- 21:57to be an awareness. People, you know, in general,
- 21:59people should have an awareness about this in terms of
- 22:02leadership. I think part of the, the
- 22:07weakness of this generation is the, the weakness of, of
- 22:11leadership in the sense of, I think a lot of leaders are
- 22:16looking behind their shoulder to see what the people want them to
- 22:20say because they're afraid of ruffling fat, you know, anyone's
- 22:24feather fat, they're afraid of rubbing someone the wrong way.
- 22:27Basically, people are afraid to speak the truth in this
- 22:30generation, you know, so I mean, as somebody, somebody came to
- 22:37me, they're working on a Tefila project and they're show, they
- 22:41come to me in the shore. They're showing me on their
- 22:43phone of, you know, all the things that they're working on
- 22:46to help people dive in properly. And why is it that people have a
- 22:49hard time, you know, concentrating on their Tefila?
- 22:52And I told the guy, what in the world are you doing?
- 22:54Bring your phone into the shore? What?
- 22:57That's the first problem, the 1st No, no, we can't say, you
- 23:01know, I, I've, I've gone to Robin and I, I've asked, you
- 23:03know, would you, could you please consider making a rule
- 23:06that you can't bring a phone into the show?
- 23:08I can't do it that people don't like it.
- 23:10So then, so why do you have the job to make money?
- 23:13So go buy a nursing home if you want to make money.
- 23:15Do you want to be rough and you're afraid to say that, you
- 23:20know, a phone does not belong in the show?
- 23:23It's such a basic thing. I mean, people, I, I see people
- 23:26on in shul, I don't know, they're watching Netflix.
- 23:30I see people, they're doing banking.
- 23:32I see people watching the Knick game.
- 23:35Wow. Not just in that.
- 23:38That's not just in America. What would somebody would
- 23:44somebody come into a shul with a big screen?
- 23:47No. No, no, like with the on a
- 23:49wheelbarrow, bring in a big screen television and while he's
- 23:53saying bro Shama, sit back with a bag of popcorn and watch, you
- 23:57know, somebody throw. So then why is it different?
- 23:59Because it's on a little thing that then it's better.
- 24:03So whose whose responsibility is it to educate the people?
- 24:08Us, us. If you're afraid to say it, if
- 24:11you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.
- 24:14You're in the wrong profession. OK.
- 24:17And why? And we're just not saying it
- 24:19because? I don't know, I can't why I
- 24:22people are afraid. People are afraid, you know, the
- 24:26there this is this is a historic issue.
- 24:31There's a historic problem. In other words, you know, you
- 24:35have a lot of shules. So who's who's running the show?
- 24:39People paying the rub or the rub.
- 24:44So if you want to go into this job, you have to have a
- 24:48backbone, you know, Loiso groom with naish.
- 24:54So you say no, no, no. But people are emotionally, they
- 24:58can't, you know, you have to explain in a straightforward
- 25:03way. What what?
- 25:06There's a God. There's something called prayer.
- 25:10There's something called the Bass Hakanesus.
- 25:13I'm saying you have, you have people who are learning in Kaila
- 25:15and that there's they're sitting next to their phone and they're
- 25:17back and forth between the safer and the phone the whole day.
- 25:20So, yeah, it requires, I don't know what it requires, some
- 25:26level of courageous leadership to, you know, call, you know,
- 25:30call spade a spade. And if Sam doesn't listen, then
- 25:33what? Kuzam why wouldn't the majority
- 25:38of people listen? I feel like the majority of
- 25:42people wouldn't really listen. Would not listen.
- 25:45Up to to cold Turkey. I don't think they wouldn't.
- 25:49I'd like to be wrong. The last thing, I'd love to be
- 25:52wrong, but do you think that every call you go to, every
- 25:55issue, if you go to and every show I go to, you say no phones,
- 25:57they'll say sure of I'll put it away.
- 25:59If I say I'm not, I'm not. I'm not saying you, I'm saying
- 26:02I'm saying we're talking about upcoming leaders.
- 26:05A person gets a job in a show first day, we're going to throw
- 26:08away the phones. Is that going to work?
- 26:12No, we're not going to throw it away.
- 26:15When you leave the premises, you take your phone, you take your
- 26:18phone with you. Do you believe in doing it in
- 26:20stages or do you think it has to be Mila Shamelai?
- 26:24In stages, What does that mean in stages?
- 26:28Year one we only bring it in for 10 minutes a day.
- 26:31Year 2, you know, we bring it in for 9 minutes.
- 26:34I don't know what it looks like. For me personally, I like the
- 26:37Mila Shamelai approach in general.
- 26:39Meaning if something's treated, it's blank and that's it, yeah.
- 26:42I, I, I don't, I don't know that you have to take out a sword and
- 26:45say Mila Shamilai and start, you know.
- 26:49It worked well with Mila Shamilai.
- 26:50It worked well. But I don't know, on issues like
- 26:59this, I've gone into shules that I remember being there 40 years
- 27:05ago and with all the programs and all the initiatives, you
- 27:09know, the same Hebraman, they're still doing the same thing.
- 27:14They're still in the rabbit. They're still, you know, look, I
- 27:23understand a lot of rubble are in a position where you know,
- 27:26they're they don't, they can't do it.
- 27:29They can't do it because the people are going to say, you
- 27:33know, you're out of here. But maybe something has to be
- 27:37thought about the, the, the make up of the way certain
- 27:44institutions are run. You know, for example, I'm, I,
- 27:47I'm aware of three Shoals besides my own, which I also
- 27:51it's my, it's my own place. OK, three Shoals in the greater
- 27:55New York area where, you know, there's no talking and, and the
- 28:00Shoal is, let's say proper decorum and covadat fila and all
- 28:05thing. All three have one thing in
- 28:07common. It's the rabbi shul.
- 28:09Yeah. So then now why is that?
- 28:12Is it, is it just, well, if it's rabbi shul, then people have to
- 28:15listen. No, there's a psychology to it.
- 28:18The psychology is that if you know, this is the rule.
- 28:22So if you're going to come into the the shul, you know what the
- 28:26house rules are. You know, to me it almost seems
- 28:31like when, when the rabbi or the, OR the Rasha Shiva, when
- 28:35it's his place, the psychology of people are we're not going to
- 28:40challenge it. You know why?
- 28:42Because there's no point. There's no point.
- 28:46It's not our place. It's, it's like you're not going
- 28:48to go into someone else's house. Imagine if the rule was you have
- 28:51to take off your shoes. You're not going to go in and
- 28:53like test the waters like, you know, wear my shoes.
- 28:57Let's see if, you know, power struggle.
- 28:59We empower struggle. He's the authority.
- 29:02You're not the authority. There can't be a power struggle.
- 29:05So psychologically you're you're going in there.
- 29:09I think the same way with Shules.
- 29:11People understand there's no power struggle because you're
- 29:13not a Bardea. There's no discussion.
- 29:17There's no discussion and and therefore if there's no
- 29:19discussion, there's no confrontation, There's no
- 29:23there's no conflict. I always, I, I like to consider
- 29:29myself a student of history. The Hida in his firm writes
- 29:33about when he went to Amsterdam and he was offered the job in
- 29:36Amsterdam. Hida talks about the pre Kadash,
- 29:39that the pre Kadash was offered to be the rub in Amsterdam and
- 29:42he turned it out. He turned it down.
- 29:44Why? Because you know that they offer
- 29:47the job to the pre Kadash and then maybe they offered him more
- 29:49money. And then the board met with the
- 29:50pre Kadash and the board told the pre Kadash what they wanted.
- 29:54And the pre Kadash walked and the Fida writes Ashrae khelkae,
- 29:59Ashrae khelkae of because he saw that they didn't actually want
- 30:05rabbi. They wanted someone who they
- 30:08could say they have the pre Kadash as the rabbi and he's
- 30:11going to sit there up front looking good.
- 30:13And they're going to put his name on top of the stationary.
- 30:16And after simhas, they're going to bring in their father-in-law,
- 30:18their family, their friends say, hey, look who I have up there.
- 30:21We have the pre Kadash, but the but they don't want him up there
- 30:25to tell them how to live or what to do.
- 30:27So he walked. What's the pert?
- 30:28What's the point? What's the point?
- 30:32If I'm not mistaken, in, in in Canada, there was once a very
- 30:38wealthy person who gave the Rabbani a lot of money to be
- 30:42financially independent. And it turns out many of them
- 30:46invested with him and they lost their money, except for one
- 30:48particular one. But there was, there was
- 30:52initiative to, so to speak, restructure, to restructure the
- 30:56way institutions work. You know, I think the way shuls
- 31:02operate where it's run by the people is dangerous.
- 31:09How could that by definition is not leadership?
- 31:12How could leadership be, you know, we'll, we pay your salary
- 31:19and we tell you what to do. So now what?
- 31:22And but we want you to lead us. No, we want you to to lead us.
- 31:26If we're pleased with what you're saying, So can that is
- 31:31that valuable? Is that is that is that going to
- 31:35create meaningful growth in people?
- 31:39She's suggesting a totally new model of myridosterous, totally
- 31:42model of Schultz going forward. You think that'd be optimal?
- 31:45Yeah, absolutely. And yeshiva salsa.
- 31:49Oh, how are you going to do that?
- 31:50So that's, you know, it happened to me in the Shiva.
- 31:52I learned in the Hub's time network of yeshivas.
- 31:54So their operating principle is the rush yeshiva is the board.
- 31:59There is no board that cannot be a board.
- 32:00If there's a board, they close down, they should.
- 32:03So I mean, you can understand that.
- 32:06I mean, yeah, I don't have a board.
- 32:07Yeah. Yeah.
- 32:09The problem though is then the problem is the money.
- 32:13Yep, that's the big problem. But that's the catch 22 but.
- 32:16We have a big viewer up there. You have a big boss.
- 32:18You have a big viewer, big boss as a global mechanic.
- 32:21What a global mechanic? I need to know because it's very
- 32:24different. It's very, if you're not
- 32:25teaching 5 people, you're not teaching 10 people, you're not
- 32:28teaching just Americans. So is a, is a global vision
- 32:31global mechanic? What should we know?
- 32:37You have very unique experiences.
- 32:46Don't forget about the people close to you.
- 32:48You know, at the end of the day, you have your home base.
- 32:55You know, it's like almost. Did he make the party first for
- 33:00the people in Shushan or the people outside of Shushan?
- 33:02According to the Mando, We made the people for Shushan first,
- 33:05you know, because that's his home turf.
- 33:07But there's another opinion note.
- 33:09You know, he first made it to the outside because he he felt
- 33:11he could always galvanized the people near him.
- 33:14I think you always have to ensure that you know, you have
- 33:17your your people that are close to you, that have your back.
- 33:22You know, you have to don't forget about them.
- 33:25You have to like put your focus on them.
- 33:29First of all, the impact you're going to have on on live
- 33:32audience I think is more is deeper and more compelling than
- 33:36whatever ripple effect you have from people who listen to you
- 33:39electronically. And you always need, you always
- 33:43need home base. Because of the the the
- 33:47difficulty of more focus being required of you is that.
- 33:50Is that what you mean? Because at the end of the day,
- 33:54you got to go home and you know, you're with them, you're with
- 33:57them on Shabbos, you're with them on Yum taevim and you know,
- 34:03they're giving you loyalty that they're allowing you to.
- 34:08Most of our bottoms, they have to be in there.
- 34:09So every single shop is day in and day out.
- 34:12So if they're sticking with you, even though you're not there day
- 34:14in, day out, you have to, you know, what I would say is
- 34:19loyalty, being loyal to the people who are loyal to you.
- 34:22I think loyalty is a mida today that's also very flimsy.
- 34:27Very. I think loyalty used to be a
- 34:31greater value and you know, people should have loyalty to
- 34:35their rabbanim. For sure.
- 34:38And the rabbanim should have loyalty to the people who stick
- 34:41with him. Why do you say that as a
- 34:43mechanic? What?
- 34:44What is that a mechanic? Yeah, meaning a global mechanic.
- 34:46Why do you say that? Dafta as a as a global mechanic,
- 34:49they should remember loyalty in in their home base.
- 34:54It's like Kakar Satayev, you know they're.
- 34:56No, I'm saying like what is that like?
- 34:57Like what do you mean? Because because you'll have a
- 34:59whole bunch of Tamidim in Brazil that want you to come for a
- 35:02Yamptiv, but your loyalty is with your kids.
- 35:05Is that what that means or just? Like yes, to be there for them,
- 35:11you know? Even when other people are
- 35:14requesting your attention. Look, that's, that's the, that's
- 35:17the challenge of my life to balance, you know, different
- 35:20opportunities with my responsibilities on Homefront,
- 35:23you know, so. Right, 100% and as someone
- 35:27that's giving so much to the M for people that also giving a
- 35:30lot over, what would you tell them in regards to their their
- 35:33families? Like, because it's hard to
- 35:35juggle everything, right? And so kids need our attention.
- 35:39So maybe there's a few things that you want to tell people
- 35:41that are up and coming to pay attention to in regards to
- 35:44Demersh Baha. Yeah, look.
- 35:48This question I get a lot by the way, I'm really curious to how
- 35:50you answer it. Yeah.
- 35:52I'm always asking myself that that question, you know, am I
- 35:56spending enough time with my kids?
- 35:57Am I giving them enough time? I have, I have kids who are
- 36:00teenagers who are almost, you know, older and, and I say, you
- 36:04know what? I, I have to take up time and,
- 36:06you know, go learn with them and yeshiva or learn with them on
- 36:08the phone. And I think going back to
- 36:11something you said earlier is Arayas, you know, if somebody
- 36:14has the opportunity to teach beyond their daladamas.
- 36:21So one thing, you know, I always brought my kids with me.
- 36:24They usually help me out with different things and I think
- 36:27that they really enjoy that so. Wow, that's, that's a very
- 36:31beautiful thing. Is there something that you feel
- 36:36everyone, so not just Mahankham, not just the, not just kids, not
- 36:40just adults going forward with all this new, as you said
- 36:44earlier, the AI generation, things are changing really
- 36:47rapidly. And with all the pluses and
- 36:49negatives that we have, what's, what are we looking forward to?
- 36:53What should what should Kleinfeld be focusing on as we
- 36:55take the next step, hopefully right before the Ecwis of the
- 36:58Mashika. What's what's, what's the yellow
- 37:00brick road, for lack of a better term?
- 37:02Yeah. What's der Hamelich?
- 37:09I think to teach our kids that even though day-to-day sometimes
- 37:16things look very difficult in the last 70 years, think about
- 37:21it, Kaiso was decimated 70 years ago, but since then they're
- 37:26bunched. Some gave us Artsu Saral Taira's
- 37:29flourishing, like it never flourished in history.
- 37:34And I think it's an expression. Rib Schwab.
- 37:36You quoted rib Schwab before. He has an amazing teaching and I
- 37:40always like to say it over. We say I have a rabba, I have
- 37:43tano Hashem alaikeno, that rabba doesn't mean with a great love,
- 37:47but rabba means an ever increasing love, that Hashem's
- 37:50love for US is ever increasing. And as much as Hashem loved our
- 37:54grandparents, he loved our parents more and he loves us
- 37:58more. And you could tell your children
- 38:01Hashem will love you even more. And I always like to say when I
- 38:05was growing up, yeah, you know how we know this?
- 38:07Because when I was growing up, they didn't have art school
- 38:09gemaras. And if you had a Bakiya's test
- 38:13and you weren't paying attention, you had to open up a
- 38:15sensino. And what was more difficult
- 38:18though, Aramaic or the ancient English, right?
- 38:22And then all of a sudden they came out with art scroll.
- 38:24So now, so now as I'm growing up, Hashem loves me even more.
- 38:28But my kids have art scroll taisus and they have misifta and
- 38:33they have shurim that they can listen to on any topic.
- 38:36So the explosion of Tara is is an expression of Hashem's love
- 38:39for Claudius Rao and and the great things are in store for us
- 38:45in the future. So basically, hold on tight and
- 38:49brace yourself. But there's the sashem.
- 38:52Vivanshem will will show us great things coming attractions
- 38:57for the Jewish people. Great.
- 38:58Sashem, I have one final question and I think we need a
- 39:01part raising children and anom that are deep thinkers.
- 39:10How do you do that? So we spoke before about Schnuck
- 39:14capricious. I think it's helpful, right?
- 39:16But how do we get our kids to be thoughtful?
- 39:18How do we get our adult Tommy them to not just follow halacha,
- 39:23but to live tower in a very real way?
- 39:25It's very nice that, you know, cut Shin Balpet, but how do we
- 39:29make the tower more the Hova salivas?
- 39:31How do we get the Hova Salivas down, not just the Hova saliva?
- 39:34You ready? Ready.
- 39:36You have to learn how to salvavas and you have to learn
- 39:39Masila Susharam and the person has to learn Musser regularly
- 39:46because that takes all the data and brings it to the lab.
- 39:51Every Worldwick told me once, he says if you're a buckler and
- 39:53you're not learning Musser every day, you're stupid.
- 39:56If you're on a break, you're not learning Musser every day.
- 39:58That's just suicide. So it's definitely hoshev.
- 40:01But what if our kids are, you know, 456 years old?
- 40:04I can't sit down and learn with them.
- 40:06Hovis all the Volvos. You know, so how do we do that?
- 40:09And, or, and and maybe maybe, you know, we'll have all about
- 40:12them and they're very busy and they don't have time to close.
- 40:13They'll love us be in. So how do we how do we teach it
- 40:17to them? In perhaps a beginner's way?
- 40:19Yeah. The the teacher, the Rebbe, the
- 40:24rob has the model at you know and rush us and and teachings
- 40:29and personal behavior. And Hashem should give us all
- 40:34sia de de shmaya to in showing our children the right path and
- 40:40developing the right Derek for ourselves, for our families, for
- 40:44our kahilais. And we should all be Zakha to
- 40:47see good things for Kali Sobhakarov on.
- 40:50Me. Thank you very much.